So there's a Marine general, an Army general, an Air Force general and a Navy Admiral sitting in the club arguing about who's enlisted members have the biggest balls. So the Navy Admiral tells a Seaman, "That guy standing at the end of the bar, go kick his ass " So he goes over and proceeds to kick his ass. The Admiral says, "See? that takes balls." The Army General says, "That's nothing, watch this." And he tells a Private, "Private, see those two big guys over there? Go over there and kick their asses." So the Private proceeds to go soundly kick those two's asses. Then the Army general says, "There's some balls now." Well the Marine General says laughing, that's nothing, watch what my guy can do." He tells a Marine Private, You see that table of guys over there? I want you to go over and kick their asses." So the Marine goes over over and proceeds to kick all 4 guys at that table. The Marine General says, "See, we Marines have the biggest balls." So the Air Force General says, you haven't seen nothing yet." He calls over an Airman and tells him to kick the asses of everybody in the room. The Airman says, "Fuck you sir." And the Air Force General says, "Now that takes balls."
Most of your amputees, veteran or not, tend to make the best of it, usually with humor. But Veterans are the best when it comes to dark humor. I used to work with a former Field Medic (i was an ER nurse) he was missing his left leg, from the knee down, and he used to entertain kids by asking them to help him with something, then 'trip' and have his prosthetic skitter across the room. He was fuckin epic
Elite Tanker like that to. Got a cousin, who lost his leg as a kid and is totally shy about ist. No shorts, no swimming, no nothing, not even talking about it.... :(
Agreed. My former boss whom lost his left leg below the knee in a motorcycle accident several years back. He invited me over for a New Years party and later told his best friend to get him a beer. 'Thats like the 8th beer i got for you, man. Are your legs broke?!' He took his leg off, threw it on the ground and said, 'It is now, bitch. Now get me a beer!' We all about died laughing. Hes been retired for 10 years now and the ol boy is still crazy and funny as hell.
"I was a Ranger" "Oh sick! What battalion?" "Well.. I was in 82nd, but I went to Ranger School"....."TAKE IT BACK!" XD had me dyinggg #RangersLeadTheWay!
@xSenshi21 Theres two different “Rangers” achievements. When you earn the tab, the yellow outlined patch, that signifies you sent to ranger school. Ranger school is basically a more advanced leadership school. Then there’s the 75th Ranger Scroll. When you earn the scroll, you have to pass what’s called RASP (Rangers Assessment and Selection Program) and once you pass that, that’s when you’re an ACTUAL Ranger and apart of the 75th Ranger Regiment. And are then put inside of a battalion. I hope this answers your question :)
@@ItzConFig as many times as you tell someone that they're never going to understand. In my day it was RIP, and no I wasn't a Ranger. Some things people will never understand especially the media, they call everyone with a tab a Ranger.
I'm an amputee and when he stole his leg it was the funniest thing I've ever seen and as I was laughing I got scared cause I couldn't find my leg (got drunk last night) it was under the bed
ohhh chietzzuzzz... i need it a lough... thanks... PS. your story reminds me of a friend of mine that has been getting drunk since his teens (like me) and one day i went to his house to pick him up (16 or 17 years old both of us) and noticed that his mom had all he porcelain decorations of the house super-glued to their respective surfaces.... hahahaha.... she got tired of him coming back hammered drunk destroying all
Hey Robert, you need to bungee it to your belt. Damn, that won't work if you get laid. Bungee it to your Other leg or your Giant bowling balls. RESPECT.
I dropped my phone laughing when he took his leg off to reach the cereal. I have literaly done the exact same thing, only with a box of twinkies. Great video guys, keep it up.
Brother with the artificial leg...mad respect for him!! The guy probably still does more before 9:00am than most of us do all damn day!!! Keep making these vids guys...lovin' em all!!!
@@superdave8248 That's the guy who gets paid disability by the VA Coming back from deployment without a leg isn't service related though, so no sweet disability check
if there are any veterans that read this I wanna thank you for everything you have done for us. My uncle died fighting 2 years ago, it really pains me to know what you guys go threw so I thank all the brave people that protect us 💪 stay strong.
I'm SFOD-D (sorry I'm not at liberty to tell you which one in particular since my username is also my real name) you have my condolences and may he rest in peace. It's always a tragedy to lose good men on the field. We are all thankfull for his ultimate sacrifice.
I love how Marines brag about running towards gunfire... The Army taught me to shoot back! This joke never gets old since I'm from a Marine Corps town and I enlisted in the Army. It's all love when you have different branches banging on each other and no one takes it personal. It's all a brotherhood of respect. Keep up the great videos!!
A soldier and a marine were walking through the woods when they came upon a bear. The soldier immediately takes his rucksack off, digs out a pair of running shoes and starts putting them on. The marine says" Are you crazy? You know, you can't outrun a bear." The soldier says" The way I see it I only have to outrun you."
I sometimes will freak people out when I’m at the gym I’ll act like I can only do 2 pull ups with extreme struggle and I’ll take off my leg and bust out a clean 20 Merry Christmas
Surprised that they didn't put in a biracial kid. Guy I knew in the Navy learned that his wife was sending pictures of the wrong kid when got back from the Med. The baby she'd actually had didn't have a white father.
AFN did it for me, I spent 2 years in Okinawa, and the choices were watch AFN or really weird Japanese game shows you couldn't understand. I learned Japanese after seeing that stupid commercial about military mascots with the irritating song that went with it for the hundredth time.
I need to share this with you guys. USMC 97-07, Iraq in 05 and 06. 1) Thanks for these videos. They've been good to see over the years. Add humor to things that didn't seem so humorous years ago. Thanks. 2) This video was made before my daughter was born. She's five now. I was watching it again this morning while having my coffee, and my daughter came and sat on my lap. The scene with JT and the shoulder, she says, "Dad, you have that shoulder thing too when you're on the couch." The scenes with the bottle of Jameson, she says, "Dad, you have that bottle too." The end with the guy's prosthetic, she says, "Dad, just like your friend Eric with the robot leg." So, looks like your content is aging well. Still pertinent. Good shit.
when he said sorry about your leg and walked off it made me kinda feel bad because I complain about small things hurting and yet this guy lost a leg and still works out and doesn't complain. god bless you dude and god bless all our vets
I understand you might be army, but who cares, I’m still sayin it: Row, Row, Row your boat, gently down the stream, lock and load, tactical mode, United States marine..
Had me cracking up for sure in quarantine, but seriously from the bottom of my heart you guys are all rock stars and I thank you endlessly for your sacrifices!
"we" you are a fucking sailor (if you even joined the navy yet) you need to stop watching that chris kyle movie and step into reality.. and reality is IF you score very highly on ASVAB and physical testing you have about %3 chance of becoming a seal. gave me a good laugh tho
Veteran: “I have ptsd” Me: “oh shit man I’m sorry to hear that, Thankyou for your service...did you go to Iraq or Afghanistan?” Veteran: “oh I was reserve and then did national guard here in the states, but I knew a lot of guys that went over there” Me: 😐
Reserve isn’t just 1 weekend a month unless you choose to be a lazy shit bird and do the bare minimum. I was a reservist and I did deployments to Africa in 6 month rotations to get that extra pay. You make bank with that overseas pay, family separation pay, and hazard pay.
@@Dudewitdaplan22 there was a guy on my ship, been there since day one. roughly a 6year tour. he starts talking about going back to his old job. im like brah, i dont think itll be there in 10 years or however many years your sticking in. he was like, im reserve. i stood back and was like "what the fuck are you doing on this ship. da fuck? do you not like your home?? and he said he choose to do more than the minimum. smh. the dopeset reservist i ever met. all the other ones did the cwo route so they can be part time officers.
The vehicle sequence skit actually saved my marriage. She saw I wasn’t just an asshole or a broken man, and I saw how ludicrously funny what I was doing was. Now we laugh our ass off together when we see a dead sheep on the side of the road. Love ya bro!
Thank you so much for your videos!!! My husband always has a hard time on Veterans Day, but this year I stumbled across this and he has been laughing his *** off!!! Thank you!!!!!
My husband is in the Air Force, the Air Force is kind of pampered compared to other branches. (Husband's words.) But all branches of the Military are great. One reason why they have the nickname, "The Chair Force." Lol. My husband just recently joined and is at tech school. He is at a joint base, he said that they have more freedom and less restrictions than the other branches there. (Army, Navy, Marines or just Army & Navy, I can't remember. ) While at BMT he said it was nothing like he expected. It wasn't as bad as he thought and his flight got lucky and had some "easier going" MTI's. We are friends with people from all branches, but most people do make fun of the Air Force. Personally, I respect all of the branches no matter who thinks they're better. In the end, you are all defending our country in some way. Love the video by the way! 😁
+Lindsey Wolfe It's just competitive behavior in the Services. In a bar or sports field, we might pound heads, but, we always stand together when needed.
+Lindsey Wolfe You're damn right we're pampered. I didn't join the military to crawl through the dirt all the time. I joined to put warheads on foreheads. There's no better feeling that seeing an aircraft leave the base fully loaded with missiles and then come back with not a single damn one.
First off thank you guys for your service. My whole family served and I just want to say thank you and god bless. And now these freaking videos freaking rock keep them coming.
One of my true stories: "I heard help! Help! He's in here!" I kicked in a steel reinforced project door. Took me three tries and I'm glad I did. My partner and I interrupted a murderous thug killing an old lady that he'd dragged into the bathtub with a 12" kitchen knife. She survived and we brought him to jail. Walked around for several years after that with a limp. Never got a metal or award.
+Chris that's quite a profession choice, especially these days with all of the heated politics and obvious dangers to your life, potentially your families life, avoiding being criminal tried yourself and or civilly sued where they try to take everything you may have worked decades to earn for you and your family. If you do later become a police officer, I hope your are safe and keep a hard focus on why you wanted to become a protector of your community in the first place.
1: it's sad that one of you lost a leg. 2: it's awesome that you guys do chin us from helicopters. and 3: it's kinda cool how you've adapted to make jokes and live with number 1.
3:21 haha I'm from Slovakia! BTW "I'm a spy and I'm here to kill you all" in Slovak would be "Som špiónka a prišla som vás všetkých zabiť." what she said was gibberish. Still a big fan of your videos!
I onced followed lasagna night from Arifjan to talil to scania to biap to taji to Freakin Speicher....every.....freakin.....night....I guess alah was punishing me....lolz
you know what meal was worse than lasagna….. salisbury steak…. point me to the nearest cadillac or porta shitter boys, daddies gonna explode lol kirkuk iraq had the best chow hall other than kuwait
I’m extremely late finding these and I feel so ashamed! I’ve got to say, I absolutely love these videos and I couldn’t stop rewinding back at the end of the video when those 2 soldiers were doing pull-ups on that helo! That was awesome!
+Alex Too Steez Yep. I can also walk, and breath on my own, so I got very lucky. I only have pain and limited movement because the 2 I broke fused together. Could have been a lot worse.
+rabbit12821 You get a certain level of respect from so many when you in the military. You make brothers and sisters for like, and get to play with awesome weapons. lol Civilian life is boring.
same .. my dad is a Major and I wanted to join but I decided it was cool putting scars on my wrist .. but there is tactical schools you can join to get a feel for combat.. I see a lot of Army contractors and People in the military take some courses to sharpen their skills. and most of these institutions are owned and taught by ex military and law enforcement .. like here in Texas we have Tactical Ranch owned by Tom Buccino an ex special forces dude. learn how to shoot from a helicopter and stuff
I'm 19 and have neck problems from football and hard work. I never got real medical treatment. now I can barely move . I hope to get Better and be a marine or a seal.
His reaction to that is the same one all Marines have when a guy says "Yeah I was in the Marines" and it turns out they never made it through boot, or even out to the fleet!!!
A friend of mine had a neighbor that's a vet. Had his house broken into while cleaning his guns. Said after the 10 minute Long barrage of gun fire, he saw all 6 of the intruders run out the front door and down the street, limping. It happened during the day while friend was mowing the lawn
Hilarious! I liked the fake Ranger bit a lot. When I was in 92-95, we had a guy who lied about going through RIP in 89, and then Panama happened and they dropped his RIP class into Panama, where he claims he got shot by an ak. Conveniently he doesn't know where he got shot, and has no scars. Another awesome adventure in his own mind was when he got recruited by the CIA to do a super secret high speed halo jump into Moscow during the fall of the USSR. But we just knew him as Haefer the Mad Shifter, as he frequently would shit his pants in the field and let it cake onto himself for hours. He also discharged his a2 while high crawling to a trench during a live fire, nearly hitting the CO as he was walking alongside us, observing. And perhaps his most legendary feat was when he scrapped above ground under his tarp hooch, and slept next to it all night. Have a good one!
I was Air Force at DLI. We called it 'Zombie Land.' Most walked around in a fog, except for the special forces guys. They always stood out. Bless these men!
I was never in the military, but my cousin did two tours in Afghanistan. His first go round was not to hard on him because he was stuck in support duty at the base in Kandahar. He second tour was more stressful because he was assigned to a driving job between said base and Kabul. So the driving part of your upload reminds me of him. Yes, understandably he just cringes when someone else is driving.
Billy Strickland Why wouldn't I be? Hundreds of Russian men and women join the spetsnaz. It's almost every Russian boys dream to be in the spetsnaz so they try out and can get in if they pass. Go to Russia almost everyone has at least one relative in spetsnaz or another special forces team in the Russian military.
Thank you. Turkey is supporting the Islamic state by trading oil for money and weapons. The Turks are (by association) responsible for any innocent person killed by the Islamic state.
So there's a Marine general, an Army general, an Air Force general and a Navy Admiral sitting in the club arguing about who's enlisted members have the biggest balls. So the Navy Admiral tells a Seaman, "That guy standing at the end of the bar, go kick his ass " So he goes over and proceeds to kick his ass. The Admiral says, "See? that takes balls." The Army General says, "That's nothing, watch this." And he tells a Private, "Private, see those two big guys over there? Go over there and kick their asses." So the Private proceeds to go soundly kick those two's asses. Then the Army general says, "There's some balls now." Well the Marine General says laughing, that's nothing, watch what my guy can do." He tells a Marine Private, You see that table of guys over there? I want you to go over and kick their asses." So the Marine goes over over and proceeds to kick all 4 guys at that table. The Marine General says, "See, we Marines have the biggest balls." So the Air Force General says, you haven't seen nothing yet." He calls over an Airman and tells him to kick the asses of everybody in the room. The Airman says, "Fuck you sir." And the Air Force General says, "Now that takes balls."
Rhonda Schmit coast guard is in a corner by its self
PINKY Zz Right on.
Hey that's pretty good😂
M Pate I was in the Air Force obviously. B-)
*whose, and you're welcome. 3C2X1 - USAF.
I like that the one guy is confident to make jokes about his missing leg
he's badass
Most of your amputees, veteran or not, tend to make the best of it, usually with humor.
But Veterans are the best when it comes to dark humor.
I used to work with a former Field Medic (i was an ER nurse) he was missing his left leg, from the knee down, and he used to entertain kids by asking them to help him with something, then 'trip' and have his prosthetic skitter across the room.
He was fuckin epic
Elite Tanker like that to. Got a cousin, who lost his leg as a kid and is totally shy about ist. No shorts, no swimming, no nothing, not even talking about it.... :(
Vets filter everything through dirty or dark humor. My Stepdad's the same way.
It's the same reason why Deadpool is so fucking funny.
Agreed. My former boss whom lost his left leg below the knee in a motorcycle accident several years back. He invited me over for a New Years party and later told his best friend to get him a beer. 'Thats like the 8th beer i got for you, man. Are your legs broke?!' He took his leg off, threw it on the ground and said, 'It is now, bitch. Now get me a beer!' We all about died laughing. Hes been retired for 10 years now and the ol boy is still crazy and funny as hell.
You got it all wrong.
When I was in the Air Force, we had blue balloons.
Bet its a blue birthday balloon
Fuck them pusswads .Air Force is the hardest to get in and the best to retire from.
Good for you that you made it.
I joined the Air Force and lived underground.
Ya, I was gonna say I'm pretty sure it would be a blue balloon. LOL.
Phil Swift nuclear related?
"I was a Ranger" "Oh sick! What battalion?" "Well.. I was in 82nd, but I went to Ranger School"....."TAKE IT BACK!" XD had me dyinggg #RangersLeadTheWay!
@xSenshi21 Theres two different “Rangers” achievements. When you earn the tab, the yellow outlined patch, that signifies you sent to ranger school. Ranger school is basically a more advanced leadership school. Then there’s the 75th Ranger Scroll. When you earn the scroll, you have to pass what’s called RASP (Rangers Assessment and Selection Program) and once you pass that, that’s when you’re an ACTUAL Ranger and apart of the 75th Ranger Regiment. And are then put inside of a battalion. I hope this answers your question :)
Dojocho Great regiment to be apart of
@@xRaramuri hey fuckbag every soldier that wears a ranger tab worked their ass off to get it and deserve the respect they earned
@@ItzConFig WENT THRU RIP RLTW 3 BAT
@@ItzConFig as many times as you tell someone that they're never going to understand. In my day it was RIP, and no I wasn't a Ranger. Some things people will never understand especially the media, they call everyone with a tab a Ranger.
I'm an amputee and when he stole his leg it was the funniest thing I've ever seen and as I was laughing I got scared cause I couldn't find my leg (got drunk last night) it was under the bed
MY QUESTION IS WHY ARE YOU SOBER SO SOON????
Comments like this are why I read them at all. Lol
I love seeing stuff about amputees and people in wheelchairs having fun with it, it's only a disability if you let it be one!
ohhh chietzzuzzz... i need it a lough... thanks... PS. your story reminds me of a friend of mine that has been getting drunk since his teens (like me) and one day i went to his house to pick him up (16 or 17 years old both of us) and noticed that his mom had all he porcelain decorations of the house super-glued to their respective surfaces.... hahahaha.... she got tired of him coming back hammered drunk destroying all
Hey Robert, you need to bungee it to your belt. Damn, that won't work if you get laid. Bungee it to your Other leg or your Giant bowling balls. RESPECT.
I dropped my phone laughing when he took his leg off to reach the cereal.
I have literaly done the exact same thing, only with a box of twinkies.
Great video guys, keep it up.
Germ .Fish this raises so many questions.
*OOF*
In war?
...because I don't give a fuuuck...
R/thathappened
2:00
“Sorry ‘bout your leg bro.”
-proceeds to walk off with prosthetic leg.
😂🤣😂🤣
Brandon M lmao
Hahaha
Yes that was the joke
Thank you for breaking that down for me.
I am from Slovakia, and the girl was speaking russian
The Russians are planning something
Tomu ver ale tak nech si to myslia 😎
That’s what make it more funny.😎🤪
@Thomase Synek lol 😂😂😂
@Thomase Synek beautiful
Brother with the artificial leg...mad respect for him!! The guy probably still does more before 9:00am than most of us do all damn day!!!
Keep making these vids guys...lovin' em all!!!
davesyerdaddy / Well said. Thank you for your support
No lie
derekweida.com/
Guy is a boss
The guy on the couch ...
"I'm 80% disable and my medical chart comes in volumes. Go the $#%^ away."
@@superdave8248 That's the guy who gets paid disability by the VA
Coming back from deployment without a leg isn't service related though, so no sweet disability check
I actually designed a prosthetic leg a while back I never made it due to lack of tools, and materials, but I'm pretty sure it would work.
"An SF dude told me he was a door kicker..." That was enough for me.. Luv you guys.....
Sf- Special force?
Eric Garcia yeah special forces are some door kickers
@@slayatommy5876 nah security forces
SF --- San Fransisco ...back door kicker 😛
You know how they do it there lol.
if there are any veterans that read this I wanna thank you for everything you have done for us. My uncle died fighting 2 years ago, it really pains me to know what you guys go threw so I thank all the brave people that protect us 💪 stay strong.
TeenLightskinz With all respect for a falle hero ,can i now you'r uncle name and rank?.And for people like you it's a honor to serve.
I'm SFOD-D (sorry I'm not at liberty to tell you which one in particular since my username is also my real name) you have my condolences and may he rest in peace. It's always a tragedy to lose good men on the field. We are all thankfull for his ultimate sacrifice.
my respects for all our Fallen. my respects to my fellow Veterans, as well as those currently serving.
TeenLightskinz thank you for the respect I appreciate that. The truth is we all know beforehand what we sign up for.. Stay Good
Peace to the fallen
I love how Marines brag about running towards gunfire... The Army taught me to shoot back! This joke never gets old since I'm from a Marine Corps town and I enlisted in the Army. It's all love when you have different branches banging on each other and no one takes it personal. It's all a brotherhood of respect. Keep up the great videos!!
A soldier and a marine were walking through the woods when they came upon a bear. The soldier immediately takes his rucksack off, digs out a pair of running shoes and starts putting them on. The marine says" Are you crazy? You know, you can't outrun a bear."
The soldier says" The way I see it I only have to outrun you."
Do they make Crayons in your home town? .. They must, otherwise no Marine would live there ..
Well, at least you know your limitations!!!! LMAO Marine NCO here.
I sometimes will freak people out when I’m at the gym
I’ll act like I can only do 2 pull ups with extreme struggle and I’ll take off my leg and bust out a clean 20
Merry Christmas
Lmfaooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Do you know the music when the guy is sorry for his leg
I really want a video of this for "when the doom music kicks in" XD
You sir, are a national treasure
The guy with the prosthetic is a legend
Vets are legends. Vets with prosthetics will be remembered for centuries.
No he is a leg-end
The pull ups on the helicopter is bad ass!
You had me at Tri-care, now that's Veteran humor!
Hey babe. If we pay for more than half of Mom's bills we can claim her as a dependent...
Surprised that they didn't put in a biracial kid.
Guy I knew in the Navy learned that his wife was sending pictures of the wrong kid when got back from the Med.
The baby she'd actually had didn't have a white father.
A Dependapotamus
AFN did it for me, I spent 2 years in Okinawa, and the choices were watch AFN or really weird Japanese game shows you couldn't understand. I learned Japanese after seeing that stupid commercial about military mascots with the irritating song that went with it for the hundredth time.
Haha yup. Goddam dependas. LMAO
*sits on floor with beer and cereal -a leg*
"Cause IIII don't give a fuck."
DemonWeasel1990 the cat just walking up to him
hahahaha 1:40 got me 😂😂 "babe,babe wake up I heard something"
*pops out of bed with AR, helmet and vest* " I got this" 😂
What song was that?
Looks like she also put on a PT belt around her neck. You can never be too careful.
I go to bed naked, so I’d be hoppin out of bed with helmet, AR, and a dick erect form the excitement of getting to defend myself
@@DaemonsAdvocate that is somehow incredibly relatable .
GRABES AT10 WARTHOG i got this
"SWICK!!!! COME PICK THIS SHIT UP"
Funniest shit ever.
SWCC
Yeah, I know. But it works better if you just type it out the way it sounds.
+John S no it doesnt
John S
salty
+Beardsley McBeard Nice stereotypical veteran avatar. Take a pill, go down to the VFW, and then fuck yourself.
Me if I were the prom date seeing guns:
“I picked the right one”
Happened to me once...I was like oh that's a sweet s&w .357 mag can i check it out?
1 leg dude is best.
"Sorry about your leg bro" lmfao😂😂
If this ever happens to me, I hope I'm as chill about it as he is. Beast.
+Alexander Angelus right?! that dude is awesome
Derek Weida
yep he is so positive and awesome :)
How to cure insomnia:
Step 1: go to basic training
Step 2: congrats! You have no more insomnia
Step 3: buy yourself an ice cream for your hard work
I have insomnia, thanks to eight years in the Marines. I'd still do it again, if I could.
I had insomnia, but I eventually slept it off.
That actually fucking worked for me
Yeah, I learned how to sleep at parade rest.
I've fallen asleep while marching. I'm not ashamed to admit it.
These videos are a mix between being serious, sarcastic, and mocking stereotypes and I love it
I need to share this with you guys. USMC 97-07, Iraq in 05 and 06.
1) Thanks for these videos. They've been good to see over the years. Add humor to things that didn't seem so humorous years ago. Thanks.
2) This video was made before my daughter was born. She's five now. I was watching it again this morning while having my coffee, and my daughter came and sat on my lap. The scene with JT and the shoulder, she says, "Dad, you have that shoulder thing too when you're on the couch." The scenes with the bottle of Jameson, she says, "Dad, you have that bottle too." The end with the guy's prosthetic, she says, "Dad, just like your friend Eric with the robot leg."
So, looks like your content is aging well. Still pertinent. Good shit.
"Sorry bout your leg bro " LMAO as he walks away with his prosthetic! Good shit. Semper Fi.
when he said sorry about your leg and walked off it made me kinda feel bad because I complain about small things hurting and yet this guy lost a leg and still works out and doesn't complain. god bless you dude and god bless all our vets
You might be a navy seal if... you forgot what your face looks like because you haven't shaved since SEAL training.
You no longer have a body, it’s just a set of legs moving a bush
"Sorry bout ya leg bro" - Classic!!!
"Sorry about your leg problem." He goes working out with a missing leg.
Bikini snap need to be trademarked!!!
It is :)
Awesome!
Finally some trademarks something instead of complaining when someone else copies it XD
+MBest11x no shit? You really got it trademarked?
+James Brown Anything is trademarked if you say it is, uploading something to the web allows you to contest any claims against a trademark.
I understand you might be army, but who cares, I’m still sayin it: Row, Row, Row your boat, gently down the stream, lock and load, tactical mode, United States marine..
I love that
Amazing
My dad was one of Uncle Sam's Molested Children, but I knew better than to take candy from strangers, so yeah, both my brother and I went ARMY!
Holy hell that was so good
SCP foundation Jesus you Foundation members are everywhere
How do I know you may ask?
I’m one of you
Had me cracking up for sure in quarantine, but seriously from the bottom of my heart you guys are all rock stars and I thank you endlessly for your sacrifices!
" How is this EVEN a Career Field !" lol
The AF may not be that strong on land but when going gets tough on the ground, that A10 or AC130 is the sweetest sound
I lost it with the Army Ranger one I just loved that!
Hoosier Jonny the SEAL one had me dying. "SWCC COME PICK THIS SHIT UP"
Heath Davis you cant say "we" bitch
"we" you are a fucking sailor (if you even joined the navy yet) you need to stop watching that chris kyle movie and step into reality.. and reality is IF you score very highly on ASVAB and physical testing you have about %3 chance of becoming a seal. gave me a good laugh tho
Veteran: “I have ptsd”
Me: “oh shit man I’m sorry to hear that, Thankyou for your service...did you go to Iraq or Afghanistan?”
Veteran: “oh I was reserve and then did national guard here in the states, but I knew a lot of guys that went over there”
Me: 😐
Didn't Bush send the National Guard in first? I remember something was seriously fucked up about Iraq.
Michael Lefort no clue
Some army and marine units request national guard units to assist them from my experience, as a national guard member
Reserve isn’t just 1 weekend a month unless you choose to be a lazy shit bird and do the bare minimum. I was a reservist and I did deployments to Africa in 6 month rotations to get that extra pay. You make bank with that overseas pay, family separation pay, and hazard pay.
@@Dudewitdaplan22 there was a guy on my ship, been there since day one. roughly a 6year tour. he starts talking about going back to his old job. im like brah, i dont think itll be there in 10 years or however many years your sticking in. he was like, im reserve. i stood back and was like "what the fuck are you doing on this ship. da fuck? do you not like your home?? and he said he choose to do more than the minimum. smh. the dopeset reservist i ever met. all the other ones did the cwo route so they can be part time officers.
Possible the first time I've seen a military related video where 80% of comment aren't claiming to be ex/serving military...
We just hadn't got it in our reccomended yet.
3:26 Actually, she isn't a russian spy, cuz her accents breaks everything down.
SHE IS A SLOVAKIAN SPY
You realize that it don't matter worth a squirt, because it was just a Joke - Right?
@@red5llaw do you realize that you'll get wooshed now?
@@donieee9607 unless of course, you done got trolled. But...
@@red5llaw whoosh
The vehicle sequence skit actually saved my marriage. She saw I wasn’t just an asshole or a broken man, and I saw how ludicrously funny what I was doing was. Now we laugh our ass off together when we see a dead sheep on the side of the road. Love ya bro!
Thank you so much for your videos!!! My husband always has a hard time on Veterans Day, but this year I stumbled across this and he has been laughing his *** off!!! Thank you!!!!!
My husband is in the Air Force, the Air Force is kind of pampered compared to other branches. (Husband's words.) But all branches of the Military are great. One reason why they have the nickname, "The Chair Force." Lol. My husband just recently joined and is at tech school. He is at a joint base, he said that they have more freedom and less restrictions than the other branches there. (Army, Navy, Marines or just Army & Navy, I can't remember. ) While at BMT he said it was nothing like he expected. It wasn't as bad as he thought and his flight got lucky and had some "easier going" MTI's. We are friends with people from all branches, but most people do make fun of the Air Force. Personally, I respect all of the branches no matter who thinks they're better. In the end, you are all defending our country in some way. Love the video by the way! 😁
+Lindsey Wolfe That reminded me of this meme I really like: imgur.com/yrgt4Z2
+Lindsey Wolfe It's just competitive behavior in the Services. In a bar or sports field, we might pound heads, but, we always stand together when needed.
+Lindsey Wolfe Hey Lindsey, my name is Jody......How are you doing?
+club tap
+Lindsey Wolfe You're damn right we're pampered. I didn't join the military to crawl through the dirt all the time. I joined to put warheads on foreheads. There's no better feeling that seeing an aircraft leave the base fully loaded with missiles and then come back with not a single damn one.
Soldiers doing Pull-Ups on a fucking Helicopter.
Coolest shit I've ever seen.
+mohamed Kashka Margaux eyes on you
SWCC!! COME PICK THIS SHIT UP!!!! yea I'm dead 😂😂
Hahaha
Jak Reaper Grimm so funny
Jak Reaper Grimm gets me every time
First off thank you guys for your service. My whole family served and I just want to say thank you and god bless. And now these freaking videos freaking rock keep them coming.
*In bed*
girl:Babe?! babe! i think i heard something
Veteran:I GOT THIS! *instantly jumps out of bed with assault rifle*
I'm dead xD
maggie Collin not an assault rifle, carbine
i like how he goes to sleep with red bull
• • I could see that comment from a mile a way😂
You might be a liberal if...
just make sure u check those corners
breakfast time most important meal of the fuuuuuuuuck
... Cuz I don't give afuuuuck....
I lost it when he drops the soap " SWIC COME PICK THIS SHIT UP"
"Some of us are crazy", would any of us have enlisted in the first place if we were sane? ;)
Would you have the desire to kill bad people from the ripe age of 13 if you were sane?!
Thank you guys for your service. Glad you made it back and are enjoying your freedom. And thanks for fighting for mine also
I KNOW MY MAN WITH ONE LEG STANDS FOR THE ANTHEM ... #VETERANSFORLIFE #AMERICAN not #AMERICANT
LOL I DIED WHEN HE GOT THE CEREAL WITH HIS LEG LOLOLOL
When my dad got back he couldn't drive under an overpass
Why?
Swedish Airsoft insurgents would run a thin wire invetween the pilliers that would take out the gunner
Oh
Swedish Airsoft yeah
My dad used to have the same problem but driving is his job now
"SWCC come pick this shit up!" I damn near pissed myself .
The dude with the prosthetic leg xD
+Wieger Piekema It gives you a new respect for those who served for America.
That would be Derek Weida, and he is officially badass. facebook.com/derekweida
Derek Weida. One of my favorite people
Give the one legged guy some credit. He takes his bad situation and makes comedy out of it.
"You know you're in a bad situation when you tell a guy with a prosthetic leg, he's in a bad situation" (PERRO DEL MONTE)
I was trying to make a compliment >.
Tomu Sentou warrior!!!!
Damn right he's a warrior.
That sentece
"What the titfuck"
Pure gold
My wife doesn't let me go to the store alone anymore
One of my true stories: "I heard help! Help! He's in here!" I kicked in a steel reinforced project door. Took me three tries and I'm glad I did. My partner and I interrupted a murderous thug killing an old lady that he'd dragged into the bathtub with a 12" kitchen knife. She survived and we brought him to jail.
Walked around for several years after that with a limp. Never got a metal or award.
Wait, where you an MP or something? Sorry, I don't know a whole lot about these types of things.
+Chris nope never was. I just told you a story. Do you have any heroic stories? Any medals or citations?
TruthNinja ehh not yet. Still in high school. Hoping to pursue a career in law enforcement though so hopefully I'll have a heroic story.
+Chris that's quite a profession choice, especially these days with all of the heated politics and obvious dangers to your life, potentially your families life, avoiding being criminal tried yourself and or civilly sued where they try to take everything you may have worked decades to earn for you and your family.
If you do later become a police officer, I hope your are safe and keep a hard focus on why you wanted to become a protector of your community in the first place.
TruthNinja Yes sir. Trust me I will never forget why I want to serve this community.
"You had me at Tricare. Meet your new baby!" I'm dying LOL!
Thats entitlement for you.
You might be a veteran if you
Served in the military
Or you went to uni, got a degree and now treat injured animals
Slightly different there. Good try though
@@biggfluffy2107 probably meant to say "you might be a vet"
That would be Matt from Demolition ranch
You been talking with AOC, haven’t you?
That would be ‘vet’ not ‘veteran’. Otherwise it just doesn’t make sense
I see that guy lost one of his leg and still make funny videos. Thank you for your service man.
1: it's sad that one of you lost a leg.
2: it's awesome that you guys do chin us from helicopters.
and 3: it's kinda cool how you've adapted to make jokes and live with number 1.
That's Derek Weida, check him out, RUclips channel Straight Legless.
Nathan best that's him!?!? he just became even cooler!
Oh God, I didn't wanna laugh at 1:30-1:39, but the guy just sitting there eating cereal going IDGAF made me crack up.
Lol I felt bad also XD
I lost man!!
You're supposed to laugh, it's a comedy skit
THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE TO OUR COUNTRY !!!!!! AMERICA !!!!
Mick Gepford Yeah. Those chicks were pretty hot.
Thank you so much for your service, guys. May God bless and protect you and your families.
"SWCC! COME PICK THIS SHIT UP!"
I almost pissed myself
3:21 haha I'm from Slovakia! BTW "I'm a spy and I'm here to kill you all" in Slovak would be "Som špiónka a prišla som vás všetkých zabiť."
what she said was gibberish. Still a big fan of your videos!
What she said sounded like Russian. Though, all I could make out was "Я шпион"
What she said was probably Slovenian. But people get us mistaken for them all the time....
@@thewooxer That was definitely Russian.
It was russian, but the sentence is wrong. It sounds like "Я щпиёнка, я здесь убить вас всех", instead of "Я шпионка и я здесь, чтобы убить вас всех".
@@LTLoudpack7100 yeah, it was russian, but it took me like 3 times to realize what she said (native russian).
“Hey guys it’s defiantly gonna be sunny out day for this battle!”. “How is this even a career field?!?”. “I’m Special Operations too!”. 😂
Mad respect to all of our military,army and Navy you guys and girls ROCK!? Thank you all for your services and sending love to all
You had me at the bikini start - and the all american end - damn
You might be a Veteran if...
You know the joys of steak night and you get confused if it doesn't fall on Friday.
haha the same night as crab night or mongolian night
That was crab? I thought it was some sort of synthetic rubber with crab flavoring.
I onced followed lasagna night from Arifjan to talil to scania to biap to taji to Freakin Speicher....every.....freakin.....night....I guess alah was punishing me....lolz
There were worse meals than lasagna, it wasn't the greatest, but definitely not the worst.
you know what meal was worse than lasagna….. salisbury steak…. point me to the nearest cadillac or porta shitter boys, daddies gonna explode lol kirkuk iraq had the best chow hall other than kuwait
"I'm a spy and I'm here to kill you all." Was my favorite
I’m extremely late finding these and I feel so ashamed! I’ve got to say, I absolutely love these videos and I couldn’t stop rewinding back at the end of the video when those 2 soldiers were doing pull-ups on that helo! That was awesome!
What band is that at the end? Thats good shit.
Band: Set Apart
Song: Your Counterfeit Jesus
ikr such a bro man
Tyler Kamps i woulda sent this to my girl buut her dad was in the air force ahahhahahaha man
Set Apart, the songs "your counterfeit Jesus"
Set aparr
That air force bit. I laughed so hard.
"I'm special operations too."
But it's alright, I like my branch.
"what the titfuck" Lol
Need song titles in the box, my dude.
ruclips.net/video/MfUuJma2NWY/видео.html
Of you guys are really vets I wanna say thanks for your service
Not in the military, but I grew up in a military family and have friends serving... The accuracy is painful.
Your name..... oh my fucking god....
fuck bro , wtf is that!?! jajaja a password? hahaha
lmaoo that name is not joke!
Nicolas Pino jajaja? You mean, hahaha?
***** Spanish speakers tend to spell 'ha' with j's as h's are silent in Spanish. The 'h' sound is represented by the letter 'j' in their language.
Never got a chance to join any branch. Break your neck in a car wreck, kind of gets you turned away from any branch. =/
+Alex Too Steez Yep. I can also walk, and breath on my own, so I got very lucky. I only have pain and limited movement because the 2 I broke fused together. Could have been a lot worse.
+rabbit12821 You get a certain level of respect from so many when you in the military. You make brothers and sisters for like, and get to play with awesome weapons. lol Civilian life is boring.
rabbit12821 Not military but the humor is great.
same .. my dad is a Major and I wanted to join but I decided it was cool putting scars on my wrist .. but there is tactical schools you can join to get a feel for combat.. I see a lot of Army contractors and People in the military take some courses to sharpen their skills. and most of these institutions are owned and taught by ex military and law enforcement .. like here in Texas we have Tactical Ranch owned by Tom Buccino an ex special forces dude. learn how to shoot from a helicopter and stuff
I'm 19 and have neck problems from football and hard work. I never got real medical treatment. now I can barely move . I hope to get Better and be a marine or a seal.
"I was in the 82nd but I went to Ranger School"
Best line in this
Agreed. Paradumpers. sheesus.
His reaction to that is the same one all Marines have when a guy says "Yeah I was in the Marines" and it turns out they never made it through boot, or even out to the fleet!!!
“Most important meal of the ..fuuuuuuck” hahahaha
1:35 what a fucking legend
Might be a veteran if you knife hand random things.
"Can you pass me
*Intense knife hand*
the ketchup?"
"You had me at Tricare" - that didn't age well.
Never gets old... Great videos guys. Thanks for your service.
"SWCC! COME PICK THIS SHIT UP" ROFL
The whole someone trying to break in and me whippin out my 9mm and 12 gauge. Yep that's me.
A friend of mine had a neighbor that's a vet. Had his house broken into while cleaning his guns. Said after the 10 minute Long barrage of gun fire, he saw all 6 of the intruders run out the front door and down the street, limping. It happened during the day while friend was mowing the lawn
+Morgrim DarkHeart is your friends neighbours name matt carriker? Just wanna know
+Ameera Hussain love all 3 of his channels! life is good on the ranch. 🔫😄🐕
Hilarious! I liked the fake Ranger bit a lot. When I was in 92-95, we had a guy who lied about going through RIP in 89, and then Panama happened and they dropped his RIP class into Panama, where he claims he got shot by an ak. Conveniently he doesn't know where he got shot, and has no scars. Another awesome adventure in his own mind was when he got recruited by the CIA to do a super secret high speed halo jump into Moscow during the fall of the USSR. But we just knew him as Haefer the Mad Shifter, as he frequently would shit his pants in the field and let it cake onto himself for hours. He also discharged his a2 while high crawling to a trench during a live fire, nearly hitting the CO as he was walking alongside us, observing. And perhaps his most legendary feat was when he scrapped above ground under his tarp hooch, and slept next to it all night. Have a good one!
Omfg I think I sharted
stolen valor
I was Air Force at DLI. We called it 'Zombie Land.' Most walked around in a fog, except for the special forces guys. They always stood out. Bless these men!
This guy with one leg has got some Humor... 👏👏👏
The guy with 3 legs is pretty funny too. :)
"I GOT THIS!"
*dead
What song was that?
Im ex brit army , fuck its a western thang funny as fuk
can i interview you over email for a school project due tomorrow
mick dandan sure
whoops im late lol
and also your name.
just call me x
I was never in the military, but my cousin did two tours in Afghanistan. His first go round was not to hard on him because he was stuck in support duty at the base in Kandahar. He second tour was more stressful because he was assigned to a driving job between said base and Kabul. So the driving part of your upload reminds me of him. Yes, understandably he just cringes when someone else is driving.
Wiafu hears a bump in the night...
Normal guys: grabs closest weapon
Me: grabs duct tape
My girl: grabs chloroform
Bump in the night: 😐
Lol
That will teach em!
1:30 Thats some really good sick humor.
Oh good, I felt bad laughing at that guy
***** why, he obviously has a good sense of humor about it
randomGUY843 I don't know, I feel bad giggling at disabled guys I guess
***** they want to treated how they were before they got hurt changing your attitude towards them messes with there mind
Anyone: Airforce sucks
Airforce: Angry A10 noises
BBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!
Sorry, we cant hear you over our F-22 Raptors!
Say hello to my little friend.....MOAB sticking out the ass end of a C130!!!!
You are ALL awesome!! Thank you for your SERVICE!!
Yo infantryman fromAlpha Company 1-22 4th Infantry Division 2003 to 2006 Iraq war veteran steadfast and loyal love you vets
You might be spetsnaz if you have to disarm a nuclear weapon with your toothbrush on a daily basis.
(I'm spetsnaz by the way)
+Moscow Memories no youre not
Billy Strickland
Why wouldn't I be? Hundreds of Russian men and women join the spetsnaz. It's almost every Russian boys dream to be in the spetsnaz so they try out and can get in if they pass. Go to Russia almost everyone has at least one relative in spetsnaz or another special forces team in the Russian military.
Thank you. Turkey is supporting the Islamic state by trading oil for money and weapons. The Turks are (by association) responsible for any innocent person killed by the Islamic state.
Владимир Рыжов That's not even including to want they did to Christian people of the Balkans and Caucasus.
+Владимир Рыжов I live in Turkey but i'm a kurd and i think spetsnaz IS COOL AF.
: uses prosthetic leg to take down the cereal : cuz I don't give a fuck
Thanks for all y’all do. Our modern day heroes!