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Dating & Waiting | What I Got Wrong + What I got Right! | 29 & Waiting Until Marriage | Melody Alisa

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  • Опубликовано: 13 авг 2024
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    Hey friends! We're back with episode 3 in our Godly relationship series! Today, I am talking about dating and waiting! Specifically dating (not courtship or being in a full committed relationship) and waiting! I am sharing the things I got right and the things I got wrong when going out on dates while waiting/ I touch on boundaries in dating, specifically Christian boundaries in dating, and purity advice. ENJOY!! To get Verb Energy’s Starter Pack for only $12, visit cen.yt/VerbEnergyMelody2
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    NEW HERE?
    -
    Hi! My name is Melody Alisa - welcome to my channel. I lived in South Korea for two years where I met God and I documented my life as an English teacher (check out my Life in Korea playlist for more on this!) Now, I call Atlanta home. On my RUclips channel, I share my Christian faith and life as a creative, a newlywed, a soon-to-be first time mama through weekly new videos!
    0:00 Introduction
    4:50 Not being obedient
    7:38 Let Loneliness be my Driven Force
    9:30 Being so Impatient
    11:38 Being Upfront & vocal about my relationship w/God
    12:33 Being Upfront with my Desire to wait until Marriage
    14:14 Allowing my Friends to hold me Accountable
    christian dating, christian dating tips, melody alisa, physical boundaries in dating, dating boundaries

Комментарии • 455

  • @MelodyAlisa
    @MelodyAlisa  3 года назад +42

    Hey guys!! be sure to comment below & share something you got right & something you didn't get so right (if you feel led!) and remember, to get Verb Energy’s Starter Pack for only $12, visit cen.yt/VerbEnergyMelody2​

    • @denisedean8503
      @denisedean8503 3 года назад +1

      Love your hair what products do you use. 🙏🏾

    • @mariav0722
      @mariav0722 3 года назад +1

      Oh my gosh same for me on the dating apps!!! God literally convicts me and tells me to get off the dating apps…

  • @bynes2674
    @bynes2674 3 года назад +1179

    One thing I believe that I am doing right in this season of my life is not dating. I was 22 when I decide to stop dating( I'm 23 now) . I realized that I had to love God and myself before I could properly love somebody else. One thing I can do better is to not drown myself with social media. It's a distraction for me and I can definitely use that time to get closer to God by reading my Bible and praying.

    • @saseeke
      @saseeke 3 года назад +25

      Delete it for a year it's hard to do but it's so life-changing.

    • @believe8754
      @believe8754 3 года назад +31

      I absolutely agree with you. Social media is a distraction or an idol for me and I'm really fighting to over this idol and make God my one and only. I want to give my full attention to Him only. I pray that the Grace of God will locate us all and help us overcome out idols or distractions.

    • @Bee-wd4mh
      @Bee-wd4mh 3 года назад +5

      🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾👍🏾

    • @missfefeloves
      @missfefeloves 3 года назад +5

      Same

    • @glennnesley1811
      @glennnesley1811 3 года назад +4

      Yessir, definitely .

  • @mocah1217
    @mocah1217 3 года назад +473

    ...."but now ya girl is married" let them know sis. Period.
    CONGRATULATIONS

  • @morake452
    @morake452 3 года назад +472

    That loneliness has taught me to be on God, hooked on God.

  • @martinrenderstudio802
    @martinrenderstudio802 2 года назад +644

    I have advice for my single folks. I waited until marriage and so did my husband and I didn't meet him until I was 32 and didn't marry til 35. I only dated a few short lived times in my 20s. I was extremely focused on God in my 20s. I don't have regrets because I was doing God's will but once I hit 30 it got harder because I thought God forgot about me. I was on the verge of giving up and then my husband came. I would advise single folks....PLEASE ENJOY SINGLE LIFE....STAY FOCUSED ON GOD. DONT IDOLIZE MARRIAGE. Pray for it and have faith for it but don't want it more than God. Your spouse won't fill you. Create an environment that welcomes your singlehood. So hang around people single so you don't feel out of place. There is nothing wrong with being single. Jesus was single. Focus on God. Travel and have Fun. Don't waste years being sad about being single. I don't regret focusing on God in my 20s. I do regret not traveling on my own. Travel with family and kids is hard. I also regret spending years being sad. From 30 to 32. I was so sad I wasn't in a serious relationship instead of enjoying my life. Now my kids CONSUME my whole life. It's hard to focus on myself at all. God knew this so he gave me alot of single years to focus on myself and my dreams. I wish I never wasted a minute being sad but traveling and enjoying life alone! You yearn for alone time when married with kids. It's the extreme opposite of single life. So enjoy the alone time. When lonely hang out with lots of friends or get a roommate!

    • @vee_101Q
      @vee_101Q 2 года назад +4

      Great word

    • @kareenah9290
      @kareenah9290 2 года назад +4

      Thanks for this advice 💖💖

    • @rayplaysyt
      @rayplaysyt Год назад +2

      God Bless u for sharing ❤u

    • @MelodyNicoleSibley
      @MelodyNicoleSibley Год назад +7

      Where did you find single friends after 30?

    • @karenmkindaro9764
      @karenmkindaro9764 Год назад +12

      This is the most beautiful comment. I just turned 32 last week and I felt that you are talking about me. I've been single forever sometimes it feels like no one is interested at all and it's been boring and lonely for a while now. But the only thing I love to do I travel places alone and it made me happy.🙂

  • @kellymarmol7193
    @kellymarmol7193 3 года назад +428

    Something I got right:
    Deciding to stop dating and be celibate to focus on healing myself and my relationship with God at the age of 18.
    Something I got wrong:
    Flirting/ entertaining situations I knew weren't going to go anywhere / were not bringing God honor.
    I am currently 21 (turning 22 in July), happily single and my relationship with God is stronger than its ever been and I can truly say he is the property in my life. I am no longer looking at God for what he can do for me but what I can do for him, to serve him and spread his gospel whenever I am given the chance. Everything I do, I make sure I do it following His commands and honor His name.

  • @camishatolliver
    @camishatolliver 3 года назад +107

    “God is not the author of confusion”
    That part!❤️

    • @godwinpeter4974
      @godwinpeter4974 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you...................

  • @alanataylor5879
    @alanataylor5879 3 года назад +267

    Things she got wrong:
    1. Not being obedient
    2. Letting loneliness be her driving force
    3. Being impatient 9:33
    Things she got right
    1. Upfront on believing in God
    2. Upfront about waiting till marriage
    3. Allowing friends to hold her accountable

  • @kara_laray
    @kara_laray 3 года назад +293

    Yes to the dating apps! Lol literally every time I download, it’s deleted within 24 hours, its just not for me

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  3 года назад +59

      Sometimes you just know it in your spirit!!

    • @tracymuzuva7035
      @tracymuzuva7035 3 года назад +1

      Haha Kara La'Ray me is you girl😂😂

    • @tannycaines1252
      @tannycaines1252 3 года назад +8

      Same for me. I be on then shortly after I'm like no way!

    • @chanelfyffe23
      @chanelfyffe23 3 года назад +26

      I literally just deleted a dating app after two months. I said no this pool of men are lonely and too sexual for my liking during this pandemic. Oh my all the things you said in the last portion about what you got right is exactly where I am at. This is for sure confirmation.
      What I got wrong: ignoring the the big bright red flags for example talking about sex the first phone conversation then the second and third and I continued to talk to them smh.
      What I am still learning: accepting the bright red flags from the start. I would give a person many chances to confirm if what I saw was really a red flag. I hope now that I will believe it the first time and not question it.

    • @LonitaChiquita
      @LonitaChiquita 3 года назад

      Lol same

  • @faithwalk.
    @faithwalk. 3 года назад +330

    I feel like something I got wrong is telling friends who don't believe in waiting that I was waiting.

    • @tshepinicol
      @tshepinicol 3 года назад +60

      That is one thing I decided to change, I learnt that i can't go around announcing that I am waiting.

    • @lisamedla
      @lisamedla 3 года назад +34

      This...I should have shut up more about this.

    • @prayingmotherfrye1350
      @prayingmotherfrye1350 3 года назад +6

      Amen Sister!!

    • @kelleykelz1433
      @kelleykelz1433 3 года назад +3

      YESSS!

    • @Kaveee12
      @Kaveee12 2 года назад +4

      This!!!

  • @rosejohnson5974
    @rosejohnson5974 3 года назад +49

    God is good.
    When you are single, let Jesus be your best friend. He will carry us through our season.

  • @tobiosiname9408
    @tobiosiname9408 3 года назад +80

    Some thing I got wrong was an over-dependence on my bf to help solve my issues instead of depending more on God. Some thing I got right was that we are both believers. ☺️ God sent me a man who loves Him earnestly.

  • @trinitywood8148
    @trinitywood8148 3 года назад +113

    22 and waiting and not ashamed! No more compromising my body to please a guy or feel more accepted. 8 months of singleness have been a beautiful journey, having a relationship with God is what’s on my mind everyday. I too was very into online dating and finally gave it up and decided to fully trust in the lord.

    • @metcalf3485
      @metcalf3485 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you............

    • @frankbobby1930
      @frankbobby1930 Год назад +1

      Hi @Trinity

    • @trinitywood8148
      @trinitywood8148 Год назад +1

      Now 23 and still waiting after 2 years, still going strong 💪

    • @frankbobby1930
      @frankbobby1930 Год назад

      @@trinitywood8148 can we connect on IG

  • @baaabydoll.k
    @baaabydoll.k 3 года назад +110

    I often find myself comparing myself to my friends. I have two close friends and they are both in relationships, so I definitely feel lonely a lot of the time. I’m learning how to let God fill that area instead of sulking in sadness.

  • @MelissaJackson-ry2er
    @MelissaJackson-ry2er 3 года назад +85

    I have been learning not to compare! I have been afraid of commitment because I have been around a lot of bad relationships and marriages. Now I look for the good and if the good is not there, I move on. And I don’t rush into any relationship. There is joy in patience. If he can’t be patient, then he is not the one for me. I want what God wants for me.

  • @sidoniahamilton2218
    @sidoniahamilton2218 3 года назад +88

    The part when you said that you even struggled with believing that your husband was out there hit me because that’s something I struggle with believing at times but seeing you hold it out and trust God really encourages me 🙏🏾 thank you! ❤️

  • @naongakalumbi8670
    @naongakalumbi8670 Год назад +10

    I just turned 27. Watching this video has encouraged me. I really want God to have his way in my life

  • @veekahbapey
    @veekahbapey 3 года назад +110

    As a single person waiting for God I'm grateful for your videos because at times because of the world many cannot bare to wait, I refer your channel to my friends who struggle in this area.

  • @mnisi_sindile
    @mnisi_sindile Год назад +48

    I grew up a promiscuous girl, had more than 100 sexual partners by age 35,started having sex at a very early age as a result of rape and my mother's modeling (promiscuity). I mainly had sex to please guys, never for pleasure, I've had a handful of pleasurable sex out of the over 100 encounters.I'm now 38, single, and want to wait until marriage. I pray God renews my mind and view of sex, because a big part of what i believe about sex is that it is only to please a man and not for my enjoyment aswell. A big part of my view about it is that it's wrong, it's sinful, i edned up condemning myself and got stuck in the cycle of promiscuity and over compensating by trying my best to live right.

    • @hellenkekana5544
      @hellenkekana5544 Год назад +10

      I was promiscuous until God convicted me and I healed emotionally through therapy and finding God, now I made a vow of celibacy and its the best thing I ever did...I actually view it as a gift because sex took so much from me and made me a person I'm not
      And I believe sex within the confines of marriage will be so much enjoyable by both parties because it is God's will for us
      Don't condemn yourself know that God forgives us of all sin, but we must repent 😊

    • @demetraking5556
      @demetraking5556 Год назад +4

      It was this comment for me. I have a similar story. Would love to connect. I’m often feel like I am the only person walking around with story. Also makes me feel that I’m not worthy for much of anything. God bless your courage.

    • @simplykayy
      @simplykayy Год назад +5

      The Lord will renew your mind and transform you and your story

    • @JoiLHogue719
      @JoiLHogue719 Год назад +1

      This is my hard truth as well… this hit home thank you for this comment ❤

    • @mnisi_sindile
      @mnisi_sindile Год назад +2

      @@JoiLHogue719 hi beautiful, loved, forgiven and favored child of God 😊i recently discovered this channel LOVE ALWAYS MINISTRIES by Brittni De La Mora She is a former prostitute who found God and is now happily married to a wonderful man of God, i believe if God did it for her He can do it forble as well, i was really encouraged by her story and testimony, if she could overcome the shame, guilt and condemnation that came with her past life, then so can we 🤗be blessed God loves you and knows you personally, nothing about your past is a surprise to Him.

  • @simangelemngomezulu5809
    @simangelemngomezulu5809 3 года назад +105

    Definitely felt the part about loneliness, I feel lonely everyday and esp being around people that are in relationships, can make you feel a certain way about waiting, I recently decided to intentionally choose to distract myself from such thoughts by reading a book, a Bible verse or listening to some worship music, and Wait On You by Maverick City and Elevation Worship has been my go to for everything, not just dating.

    • @brxanashanae7879
      @brxanashanae7879 3 года назад +5

      I run to song for EVERYTHING! It speaks to me in every aspects of my life. I know with waiting and obedience God will fulfill his promises. I seek him everyday and everywhere so I’m not distracted.

    • @daniellemarshall3251
      @daniellemarshall3251 3 года назад +2

      Wow literally wait on you has been my song for this season as well. Know that you are definitely not alone sister we just need to depend on God and trust in him ❤❤ he is our everything and will be our everything even within a relationship

    • @simangelemngomezulu5809
      @simangelemngomezulu5809 3 года назад

      @@daniellemarshall3251 Most definitely. Because we have goodness and we have mercy, our souls have sherpards in the valley we shall not want✨

    • @Claudia-yc8xk
      @Claudia-yc8xk 2 года назад +3

      This is me right now, everyone is getting married, having children and in relationships and I feel like I'm the only one. I'm trying so hard to stay in prayer and distract myself and know God has a great plan for my life and yours too ! The loneliness is hard 🥺

    • @EssenceofPolish
      @EssenceofPolish Год назад

      That song uplifts me as well! I love Maverick City!! “The One You Love” is another favorite because the guy I was with in my last relationship didn’t/wouldn’t make time for me so it really hurt and drained me that I didn’t feel like a priority. So the part of the song that says “I am safe there. And secure there! Not fighting for attention, fighting for affection! I belong there!” that part always makes me feel God’s arms around me!! It feels so safe and secure just like the song says!!! 😌😌☺️🥰🥹🥹😌😌😌😌

  • @aQueen2adore
    @aQueen2adore Год назад +18

    Currently 42 and still waiting and waiting patiently (never married). I’ve been single since 2010 and started my celibacy journey in 2017. In the beginning it was haaarrdddd, still hard but not so bad. There is a reason for this waiting season and I have to continue seeking what that reason is. Love all of your videos and truly grateful to have come across your page. God Bless Queen and thanks for your transparency.

    • @dokido258
      @dokido258 Год назад

      Am finding it so hard, its a lonely place the waiting esp when you live alone in a foreign country & everyone around you is getting married, starting families etc…. 😢

    • @ThhLeader
      @ThhLeader Год назад

      Have you read “What Mama Couldn’t Tell Us About Love?”

  • @Gbaby_1241
    @Gbaby_1241 3 года назад +242

    Last night I hooked up with this guy cause I was reading the bible and saw the type of love God had for people like Ruth, Esther, etc. And my heart ached for it. I settled for simple physical attraction and the morning after I felt bad. Like, I could feel a piece of me leave with them and this video is just SO on point like okay God I'm listening now lol

    • @deebestest100
      @deebestest100 3 года назад +24

      Sending you love girl ❤️ I know how that feels

    • @sincerelykayyy
      @sincerelykayyy 3 года назад +14

      I had a similar experience this weekend. I feel you Gaby!

    • @ydruck19
      @ydruck19 3 года назад +45

      Thanks for being so transparent. You are strong and loved by God. I'm with you, I'm done giving away a part of myself to someone for a few minutes pleasure. God will bless the ones who are patient and obedient.

    • @rosemarirodriguez3793
      @rosemarirodriguez3793 3 года назад +22

      By his strength not by ours ! This happened to me as well but all glory to God he brought me through the storm and help me overcome ! I am truly free from that bondage now and in the name of Jesus you will be too ! Seek him above all

    • @Gbaby_1241
      @Gbaby_1241 3 года назад

      @@nakeshabwala5222 huh?

  • @aprilvojtek8007
    @aprilvojtek8007 Год назад +13

    The Lord sent me my husband when I stop trying to do it my way and gave it to him which means no dating at all waited for him to guide me now been married 3 years yeah 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 praise God

  • @NigelFulmoreSmith
    @NigelFulmoreSmith 3 года назад +29

    Why is everything in your home so aesthetically pleasing? 😭

  • @jewelskinney4926
    @jewelskinney4926 2 года назад +19

    I’m 33 and have a close relationship with God but I have failed I’m some areas. I’ve recently decided to start over and continue to wait until marriage. I hope to find my person as I am getting older lol thank you Melody Alisa for showing us it’s possible when you have patience.

  • @mkelly3846
    @mkelly3846 Год назад +23

    Currently 29 & waiting 😁 Everyone’s journey is different and I try not to compare my life to others, but 1 thing I’m doing right is changing my mindset which I know will allow me to live my desired life. 1 thing I was doing wrong was not getting to know God. It’s a process, but I’m practicing patience. Thank you so much for your videos! I’m glad you popped up on my feed! 🙏🏾🙌🏾

  • @ThandolwethuSpace
    @ThandolwethuSpace 3 года назад +78

    im single but not looking to be in a relationship, looking back something I notice was really hindering my purity and relationship with God is engaging in texting that's sexual and flirty with the opposite sex. another thing id advise people to be careful with is their friendships, most of my friends were on the lgbt spectrum and that really confused me for some time. i was confused about how to think about God, is He righteous and just or just hateful and judgemental? i also wondered about my own sexuality because of who I surrounded myself with so yeah, that's my advice for anyone reading this. GOD BLESS YOU!

  • @hentsoful
    @hentsoful 3 года назад +56

    I am 28, never been in relationship. That is very old and late in my country. I surely see God's hand protecting my mind and preventing me from messing with myself, but I am just willing to meet my person, I feel I am ready. Please pray, thank you!

    • @metcalf3485
      @metcalf3485 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you.........

    • @bolanleadeola456
      @bolanleadeola456 2 года назад +2

      I celebrate you sis. Worry not, the best man is coming your way, the very perfect will of God for you.

    • @hentsoful
      @hentsoful 2 года назад +2

      @@bolanleadeola456 His blessings be with you sis, always. Thank you so much! Glory to God only, I am still persevering in His grace 🙂 He gave me more important clarity lately

    • @sanitationEng
      @sanitationEng Год назад

      Wow!This is truly grace

  • @chanelwilliams8509
    @chanelwilliams8509 3 года назад +65

    Suggestion for the name of this series: "The Wait is Over... Now What?"

  • @novascotia20
    @novascotia20 3 года назад +17

    3 things I learned during my singleness (and continuing on that path)
    • Be patient like you said, don’t rush into things and call to God and ask him to continually guide you.
    • When I went on a date I wasn’t confident or comfortable enough to tell a guy I was saving myself for marriage. When I felt that way I knew I wasn’t ready to date yet and I knew that this was my time to grow stronger in my faith and relationship with God.
    • Enjoying your singleness and finding joy in every day. Thanking God and praying without ceasing!
    💛 I’m a new subscriber and loving your content!

  • @alifewellshared
    @alifewellshared 3 года назад +29

    Wow reading through some of these comments has so resonated with me it’s unreal. I think being surrounded by relationships and “hot girl summer” and everything else has ended up making me feel so lonely sometimes and it makes it difficult to trust in God’s timing that there’s someone for me. But it takes me finding that validation and companionship within myself and Him first before anything else can come!

  • @analysialuke7096
    @analysialuke7096 3 года назад +32

    So, thanks so much for this video. It's is encouraging. I'm in this waiting season 28 and waiting. And yes God told me to get off those dating sites and everything. At first, I was so anxious and lonely but now I am so focused on God and I found peace and comfort in God. I am like God I really didn't imagine that I could be satisfied, happy and peaceful in God.

  • @smchapman23
    @smchapman23 3 года назад +17

    I resonate with not being in the right spaces. God called me into a season of singleness but I ended up being involved with guys on three separate occasions. Like yourself, I had to have the “break up” conversation with people I wasn’t even dating. While I was in this disobedience, I found my impatience , loneliness , and frustration at an all time high. Once I said yes to His will and obeyed, I’ve been great ever since! Thank you for this video❤️

  • @jackiek4159
    @jackiek4159 3 года назад +42

    Congratulations on the marriage sis!! 😍💍 I can sooo relate to not being obedient and being on these dating apps when I knew deep down that I wasn't going to find him on there! They are filled with guys not knowing what they want and only looking for one thing! Keep the faith in God ladies, you godly man will find you! 🙏🏻💞

  • @missycolson4137
    @missycolson4137 3 года назад +16

    This is what I needed I’m 30 and I’m going to patiently wait sometimes it’s hard but but I have been through a lot before and I’m trying being content and enjoy being single. Having a better relationship with God .

    • @metcalf3485
      @metcalf3485 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you.........

  • @StrawberryJamJam29
    @StrawberryJamJam29 3 года назад +43

    I’m 26, never dated and struggle with the thought that I’ll be in a relationship one day when I’ve never been approached by someone interested in a relationship. It kind of feels unrealistic, like a movie? The only people that approached were cat callers. Am I supposed to be more active in searching?
    I always felt spiritually I’ll know in the first meeting who my future spouse is like I already know what he’s like but I can’t find him? So I just feel impatient because I’m like okay I worked on myself now what 😅 But now I’m focusing on the Proverbs 31 woman and learning how to create boundaries in dating because that’s something the women in my family lack when it came to dating.

    • @FaithsStardust
      @FaithsStardust Год назад

      How are you meeting men? Do you go to Church?

    • @StrawberryJamJam29
      @StrawberryJamJam29 Год назад

      @@FaithsStardust ah my above comment is old. I meet them through shared organizations and events that I participate in. I don’t go to church, I used to. The churches in my area do not have good leadership and don’t teach the truth, so still looking for one. But even when I was at church, I noticed there was a lack of men, especially single men my age. So I think I have a higher chance of meeting someone outside of church.

    • @annaadebisi3205
      @annaadebisi3205 Год назад +1

      Sometimes it’s not about going to event or churches,ur man may not even be in ur state. This is the time to pray and ask God to lead u to d right place u need to be to meet him, or tell God to drag him personally to ur inbox.

    • @byrea4634
      @byrea4634 Год назад

      I’m 27 and everything you just mentioned is my reality, sadly for me I’ve met a man and he’s what you’d call “a Godly man” and he’s been pursuing me, I think for the past 2 months and we gave it a try for one month, he wants to marry me, I don’t want to get married (focusing on my career) and it’s been so draining, he’s a good guy but I don’t think he’s the one for me.

    • @MaEtVaBien
      @MaEtVaBien Месяц назад

      ​@@annaadebisi3205Amen !

  • @preciouschauke3109
    @preciouschauke3109 3 года назад +32

    As someone currently dating & waiting this was such an awesome video that caused me to reflect on what I’m doing right/wrong. Also got a little bit of conviction. Thank you for sharing ❤️❤️❤️

  • @BasicBeautyNaturally
    @BasicBeautyNaturally 3 года назад +15

    yes! I defintely feel the being obedient to stop yourself from being hurt AND from hurting others; especially when you truly care for them and you being the one bringing the trauma.

  • @asnardafeliz9665
    @asnardafeliz9665 Год назад +9

    30 and still on the waiting list! 🙌🏾🙏🏾
    …here i am still praying! 🤲🏾

  • @tracymuzuva7035
    @tracymuzuva7035 3 года назад +34

    You always always speak directly to me. God is using you girl.. Trust me😊. Thank you for allowing yourself to be a vessel.

  • @meadowsol11
    @meadowsol11 3 года назад +32

    You could call the series “The Successful Wait” or “After The Wait” 😊

  • @TheeNaturalLeah
    @TheeNaturalLeah 3 года назад +28

    As a person who is not super fond of ads, you do a tremendous job of incorporating them seamlessly into your video! Fabulous work as always!! :)

  • @marahreyes6881
    @marahreyes6881 3 года назад +8

    God always draws me to your videos and it’s for great reason!! I’ve struggled with trusting that God will grant me the desires of my heart. I’ve never been in an adult relationship and I’m knocking on 30 lol, so at times I do get impatient and begin to doubt that it’ll ever come to pass for me.
    Things I’ve done well with are prayingggg over whomever I’m beginning to have interest in, that God remove the person if he isn’t for me in any way. I’m also very clear about my abstinence, morals, and values and I stand in them.

    • @metcalf3485
      @metcalf3485 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you.........

  • @reneeramoleta6262
    @reneeramoleta6262 3 года назад +23

    I’m really grateful that there are channels like yours that help me navigate through waiting.

  • @aprilvojtek8007
    @aprilvojtek8007 Год назад +8

    I did find my husband online but it was after I stop forcing myself to do it my way God truly helped me I’m glad I listened 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🥰

  • @nek_k9160
    @nek_k9160 3 года назад +11

    Kinda similar to what I’m going through, except I’m running away from it all and to some extent trying to sabotage it....even when God has warned me to stop. It’s ironic how it still boils down to me not trusting God and his plans. This definitely showed up on my recommended videos for a reason, thanks!

  • @morake452
    @morake452 3 года назад +23

    I also experienced impatience. God is so gracious. I’m learning patience so much this year.

  • @sincerelykayyy
    @sincerelykayyy 3 года назад +11

    Melody you read me like a book on all three things you got wrong 😭 feeling the conviction!

  • @ydruck19
    @ydruck19 3 года назад +8

    Your testimony about going on dating apps just to see what's out there has really resonated with me and what I'm going through. I know it's not what God has called for me, but I keep finding myself going on 'just friend' dates to 'just get to know each other, as friends'. After I accept, I automatically have a bad feeling about it. I know it's God talking to me. He's probably up there yelling at me to stop and saying 'not again' hahaha.

  • @MelissaJackson-ry2er
    @MelissaJackson-ry2er 3 года назад +11

    I have been afraid of commitment. Some of the biggest mistakes that I have seen have been bad marriages and bad relationships. God is helping me work on getting rid of this fear. Comparison is not good! Now I look for the good and if the good is not there, I move on. There is joy in being patient. If he is not willing to be patient, then I know he is not for me. I want what God wants for me. God’s will is peace and love💕 .

    • @DMcConn
      @DMcConn 3 года назад

      ❤️❤️❤️

    • @franceluceborgella1508
      @franceluceborgella1508 3 года назад

      I struggle with the same thing and I’m trying to heal from that In this season.

  • @jacquiah.1577
    @jacquiah.1577 3 года назад +6

    I recently got engaged and I agree going on dates to get to know each other is really important. That's a good time to build a foundation for a possible exclusive relationship and get to know what the person is about. You have to make time for that.

  • @annesandanam3483
    @annesandanam3483 3 года назад +46

    Looovee this!!! Can you do a video on how your husband came back into your life? Pleeease? 😊

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  3 года назад +33

      Yes!! I think it’s about time we did a proper “how we met” video :)

    • @annesandanam3483
      @annesandanam3483 3 года назад

      @@MelodyAlisa Yaaay!! Can’t wait! 😊
      And for my title suggestion, what about “Marriage, after having waited”?

  • @milkandhoney7879
    @milkandhoney7879 3 года назад +16

    Advice starts at 4:45

  • @CookieMonstro21
    @CookieMonstro21 Год назад +2

    I’m about to be 40 lol did a lot backwards but it’s so refreshing seeing the responses.
    Been a widow/single father for a year and half, just focusing on the lord, my career and family.
    I have a lot to make up for with the Lord. No rush for me to jump into something as I need to heal as well before I love someone else.
    “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.” Deuteronomy‬ ‭6‬:‭5‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

  • @katythebeauty330
    @katythebeauty330 3 года назад +5

    I was thinking about downloading a dating app again and giving it another try and now I’m watching this. I know deep down that dating apps aren’t for me. Loved the part about being content with God and ourself. No one can fill the void that God can ❤️ I have to be content in where I am now

  • @jessKui777
    @jessKui777 2 года назад +7

    Chiiiile I can relate: I had a STRONG conviction from the Holy Spirit telling me NOT to join dating apps, but I kept making excuses saying how else will I meet my future hubby? Finally obeyed and left after being on & off for LONG, felt so much at peace. I also got impatient, being in my mid 30s. Now that I have my focus on God & cultivating a more intimate relationship with Christ, I learnt to trust Him, His will & timing. I also prayed for a partner that didn't quite fit what I know God wants for me: Someone on the same page with me spiritually, loves Christ, seeking a deeper relationship with Him, growing spiritually together. So I ended up in aa situation where the guy couldn't understand my choices which were spiritually-led, e.g. had abstained for years before meeting him, but he wasn't for it, it was more of me trying to convice him we abstain. We forget that we're human, so when we choose a partner that isn't like minded we easily end up being scathed/compromising in one way or another, which I did. As I nurtured a deeper relationship with Christ I accpted fully that I was praying for the wrong kind of man and began praying for the right kind, that Christ destined for us :)

  • @tannycaines1252
    @tannycaines1252 3 года назад +9

    I think that God is teaching me patience in this season and to incline to his word more. I find myself on the dating sites as well for a short while then I deactivate. There are times when I get lonely and impatient as well. When I lay down and reflect I am always wondering who God is gonna send for me. Lol!
    I like how you say you are often upfront about your focus on God and your desire to get married before anything else. That is so me right now and if they dont have the same beliefs then I know direct that is a no, no.
    I love your video as well.

  • @babelove45
    @babelove45 3 года назад +16

    I love your hair! 😍

  • @andreaweir-laverde838
    @andreaweir-laverde838 Год назад +1

    I am 30 and really understand what you are talking about... letting God fill you up, and not expecting someone else to come along and do that for you. I am building that relationship and ever since this past week I really feel that I have put things in His hands, I have felt ... calm. God's got this. Wherever the person is, I pray that God continues to bless him and mold him more and more into Jesus' image.

  • @kourtniedixon9245
    @kourtniedixon9245 3 года назад +12

    What I got wrong was to seek affirmation from my bfs which led to an unconscious dependence on their approval. You know that punctured and sunk that relationship because he couldnt fill the God-shaped hole in my heart. BUT WHAT I AM GETTING RIGHT is that Im acknowledging more that Im already in relationships eg. with Jesus, family and friends so Im working to improve how I relate to them, getting to know and appreciate them more and such. #workingprogress

    • @lead8381
      @lead8381 2 года назад +1

      that is such a profound paradigm shift! God bless you sis :D

    • @kourtniedixon9245
      @kourtniedixon9245 2 года назад +1

      @@lead8381 thank you. I do fall but I get back again. God bless you, keep you, shine His face upon you, smile on you and give you peace🙏🤗😁

  • @ShirleyT652
    @ShirleyT652 3 года назад +3

    I truly believe the right man betrothed to you from God comes when you are focused on the cross and focusing on God. I learned this.

  • @HeyItsMaori
    @HeyItsMaori 2 года назад +4

    Right now I am dating someone and what I got right was expressing early on that God was a priority and that I am waiting until marriage. What I used to get wrong and am now working on is trying to please everyone outside my relationship. All that matters is me, him, and God. Other peoples input can be taken into consideration but not be the sole reason I do or don't do things.

  • @briellemayes6723
    @briellemayes6723 3 года назад +10

    Will you do a video about how God brought y'all together and confirmed that it was His will for you to be married?

  • @misst2098
    @misst2098 3 года назад +15

    I can so relate with the part of dating apps, I just keep having that feeling that it will kit happen that way.
    My Mistakes:
    1... Not building my relationship with Jesus.
    2... Not being patient
    3... Not trusting Him.
    4... Being blinded by my feelings for the wrong guys.
    What I am doing right
    1.... Now building my relationship with Jesus. (best decision ever)
    2... Being upfront about wanting to wait.
    3... Looking at a guys fruits and not his looks.
    Thank you for the video.
    What I

  • @esteri638
    @esteri638 3 года назад +12

    Love the kettle 🤩

  • @dreamAngelXO
    @dreamAngelXO 3 года назад +4

    Love this! I have been taking a hiatus from dating but feeling lonely (we're in a pandemic so things are tough) But I know God is the only thing that will satisfy me. This video is reassuring because I know I am on the right path.. Thanks Mel

  • @londymhocho421
    @londymhocho421 2 года назад +2

    Watching your video for years, 2 years, if not mistaken, and I can say I'm motivated to continue to wait ❤️🤞🏾I'm turning 26 this year, been single and celibate for 5 years, it's been soo hard but ima continue to wait, been reading book, sermons and just preparing myself but most importantly drawing closer to God , and I'm enjoying being single ❤️🤞🏾I love your content ❤️

  • @ItGirlAri
    @ItGirlAri 3 года назад +4

    Loveeeee this video sis! Something I’m getting right: Paying attention to red flags 🚩 and something I could be better at: giving God even more time when I’m feeling lonely 💗

  • @thereshegrows113
    @thereshegrows113 3 года назад +2

    You have grown so much and you giving many people hope. You are prove that what you going through does not compare to joy God has for you!

    • @godwinpeter4974
      @godwinpeter4974 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you...................

  • @KelsShavon55
    @KelsShavon55 3 года назад +3

    Dating and waiting should be the title of the videos. You said it at the end of the video and I think it’s perfect!

  • @daelu7265
    @daelu7265 3 года назад +5

    I’m 22 rn n before I used to go on dating apps looking for love n someone I can love, but as of recent I realized I wasn’t ready to have a relationship cause I still needed to grow n find, know n love myself way more than I was doing, I’ve deleted most of my socials n only limit to 1 or 2 at a time.. I’m learning more abt the creator n praying more n be whole with my spiritual life n for the first time I’ve surrendered to have love find me n not go out looking for it.. ps I still get days when I want to just give up n go hook up with someone but pray for me I’m trying lol

  • @lillyshanz1
    @lillyshanz1 3 года назад +4

    Still on my waiting period
    At one point i felt lonely so i joined a dating app lets just say i ended up deleting it two days after installation,i have gone on "dates" and always disappointed for no one measures up to the path i want to take but glad it's a reminder of not lowering my standards....now slowly developing my patients to wait upon the Lord to guide me to my partner it's never easy and can be overwhelming but i know at the right time He shall surely make it happen for He has a plan for us filled with hope

  • @renf5246
    @renf5246 3 года назад +5

    Wow did this ever bless me.. so timely. Thank you for your honesty + encouragement Melody. All Glory to Jesus 🙏🏼🤍

  • @shywildliving
    @shywildliving Год назад +2

    thank you for this,i am waiting and have been waiting even before i gave my life to Christ. now that i am 27yrs,waiting is not hard, its choosing right especially when you feel drawn to someone. recently i have been drawn to someone (a believer but who is not completey submitted to Christ), we have different views on faith yet we have similar likes so i was so confused. your video has helped me acknowledge what i already knew that i can not have a relationship with this guy,the attraction will pass away.

  • @BeautyLoverShaa
    @BeautyLoverShaa 3 года назад +2

    Thank you for sharing your journey! What i got right - having very clear set boundaries of what i will and will not tolerate!

    • @godwinpeter4974
      @godwinpeter4974 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you...................

  • @massramara2485
    @massramara2485 3 года назад +3

    I think the name is still fitting because you are sharing about that season in your life. You were dating and waiting

  • @JennyGaston
    @JennyGaston Год назад +1

    Yes indeed sister. God is not the author of confusion. So glad that you're able to wait for your husband to pursue you. Thanks for sharing this encouraging message. ❤️

    • @amegdanish9363
      @amegdanish9363 Год назад

      What about women who are 55years old and still single ? I mean what does God want for them. This is not too easy to wait on God..

  • @keepingupwithfrancine
    @keepingupwithfrancine 3 года назад +6

    I am literally walking in the same footsteps as you did. Might not be the same, but the same way you moved with God is literally the same way I'm moving with God and I have a strong belief in my heart that God is working for my Good...God has been good to you and I pray he keeps on blessing you and your husband, your story is so inspiring😍

  • @zaniekacarmichael4650
    @zaniekacarmichael4650 Год назад +1

    Thank you so much. I stumbled upon you. I just had this conversation with a guy. I told him I have to wait and even though he is a man of god (pastor)we are not on the same page. I know this was sent by God. I know He wants me to wait. This is exactly what I needed thank you and thank the Lord

  • @falaniaae1835
    @falaniaae1835 2 года назад +1

    I’ve been content and trust God to bring the right person for me for a long time. I’ve been convicted with online apps cuz I thought of creeps and stockers and God telling me it’s not for me. This year I’m praying for a companion/husband. My loneliness has been my faith so I wouldn’t think about how lonely I am. I really like you videos of faith thru your life. God bless you

  • @jacolizedejongh8386
    @jacolizedejongh8386 3 года назад +6

    when people in their 20's complain while we are here in our late thirties and still waiting

    • @metcalf3485
      @metcalf3485 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you.........

  • @Vanestaroi
    @Vanestaroi 3 года назад +6

    This was an awesome video, I’m not interested in dating right now but this will be helpful when I’m ready.

  • @JaleiaChristine
    @JaleiaChristine 3 года назад +32

    I’m still in my single season even though I met my husband. We aren’t dating yet but the Holy Spirit gave me a word of knowledge a couple months ago.
    Some of the things i’ve done wrong are:
    1) Losing faith because I couldn’t “see” it.
    Even though the lord gave me a prophetic word and told who my husband is, I tend to go through waves of I really really believe you lord and this is never gonna happen. Im still learning that even though I don’t see what God is doing doesn’t mean he’s not working.
    Some things i’ve done right:
    1) Taking this time to HEAL!
    I have taken advantage of it just being me and the lord because it gives me the time to just sit with him. To ask him “God search my heart”, “heal me from past relationships”. I’ve had a traumatic childhood and have had some quite rough experiences in my romantic relationships. But sitting with God and letting him heal me has been one of my most favorite things about this season! Of course it’s not easy but the results of walking in freedom, forgiveness, and wholeness are totally worth the process.

    • @missliz_
      @missliz_ 3 года назад +1

      ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

    • @nclcanadian13
      @nclcanadian13 3 года назад +1

      This is LITERALLY the same exact situation for me! As I was reading what you wrote, my jaw hit the floor and I'm like omg this is me to the tea! 😱

    • @JaleiaChristine
      @JaleiaChristine 3 года назад

      @@nclcanadian13 omg that’s so funny! that’s just a reflection of how powerful the holy spirit is; I contemplated even making a comment but i’m so glad you can relate girl! follow me on insta @jaleiachristine🤍

    • @nclcanadian13
      @nclcanadian13 3 года назад +1

      @@JaleiaChristine yesss the Holy Spirit is beyond powerful and He's always working on our behalf even when we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel ❤️ I'm currently doing a social media detox this weekend but I will add you when I'm back on. Actually in the meantime you can add me @canadian_beauty20

    • @wariko_
      @wariko_ Год назад

      Did you heal before you started dating your husband

  • @mathapelonyembe4702
    @mathapelonyembe4702 3 года назад +5

    So, I'm gonna wait on You, I'm gonna wait on You.
    I've tasted Your goodness, I Trust in Your promise.
    I'm gonna wait on You (Singing)
    Thank you so much for the advice and encouragement Sis ❤️❤️❤️

    • @godwinpeter4974
      @godwinpeter4974 3 года назад

      Thank you for your comment and support.
      your comment and constant supporting have
      brought me this far. keep supporting
      michaelfoundation285@gmaill.com
      it an orphanage that has a baby dying
      from Leukemia please send an email to MD
      in charge for more support..,
      proverb;3.27,27,:26 Psalm 51,46,130, deu
      28,15God bless you...................

    • @mathapelonyembe4702
      @mathapelonyembe4702 3 года назад +1

      @@godwinpeter4974 SCAM ✋

  • @privilegephakathi3494
    @privilegephakathi3494 Год назад +2

    I've beeeeen holding back on watching this video and today I genuinely resonate with it, not only with dating but with other things in my life. I am so grateful for this video. Thank you Mel❤❤❤

  • @kshealieceartistry358
    @kshealieceartistry358 3 года назад +15

    hey i loved the series ! maybe instead of trying to rename the series you end this chapter and create a new series since you're in a new season of life ? just a thought !anywaysss you look gorgeous !

  • @chengliu872
    @chengliu872 Год назад +1

    One thing I found funny about the sex before marriage thing is culture. In Chinese-American culture it is not nearly as common, especially for Christians so it has never been seen as a big issue. When my now wife (who is black) and I were dating she was super nervous about telling me that she wanted to wait until marriage. I was like "I am thinking the same thing and I assumed that we were on the same page about that".

  • @Ang36914
    @Ang36914 Год назад

    I'm 33 years old and relate so much to this. I've been on and off dating apps for a few years now but am hesitant to go back to them because 1) you always worry about how safe you'll feel as a woman with a stranger, 2) it feels forced and unnatural and 3) some guys are in a rush to meet you or just like to neg you/play you on there. Everyone I know has met someone off dating apps (with the exclusion of one person), so I'd prefer to meet someone more organically than on a dating app. I was also using the dating apps a lot while feeling lonely and isolated during the pandemic, so I wasn't in the best headspace to be using them.

  • @ambitiousgirlR
    @ambitiousgirlR 3 года назад +7

    Looking available 🤯😳👀👀👀👀 I literally just had a conversation with myself and Jesus earlier, "I'm not about to stress myself to go and stay in a place because I can possibly meet "my husband ".... he'll find me.....

  • @jasmine-mae-c
    @jasmine-mae-c 3 года назад +2

    Enjoyed this Video A Lot! I catch myself impatiently waiting for a lot of things these days! & That means I need to look more into trusting God.
    I’m in the waiting season but not so much the dating. I have done ungodly dating before re-dedicating my life to Christ.
    And have had to deal with soul-ties that I created.
    Now moving forward in the waiting.. I am just learning more about God and His character, about who I am in Christ and allowing the Holy Spirit to Intervene and guide me through life.

  • @kathradabeverly669
    @kathradabeverly669 4 месяца назад

    On time for the 21 year old in me!Thank you for your obedience.

  • @LuckyFish3000
    @LuckyFish3000 Год назад +13

    Some of us are 38. Send prayers guys. It can be way worse.

  • @chridegekatasohire3578
    @chridegekatasohire3578 Год назад

    This is one of the best dating advice video I’ve ever watched. I’m 26 years old and single currently in the phase where i desire more God’s perfect will to manifest in my life. One thing I know that I’m doing right is the fact of me waiting upon the Lord. Thank you for this wonderful video and May God bless your mariage. Greetings all the way from Athens 🤩

  • @tonyenni
    @tonyenni 3 года назад +6

    Waiting And Dating: A Guide to Christian Singleness. its my suggestion but it might be a bit too long. on another note pleaseeeeee can you share your makeup routine pleeeaseeeeee

  • @judysimon8438
    @judysimon8438 3 года назад +7

    Thanks for this inspirational message i needed this cause its something am going through right now.🙂🙏

  • @shaylacox1489
    @shaylacox1489 3 года назад +6

    Yesss agreed!! Be obedient to God first! I am married as well so I shared this link with my amazing single friends. Also yes on the snack verb bars. You shared few videos ago and I am enjoying them, they have the best customer service experience as well. Appreciate you lady, thank you 😊 🙏

  • @Nadiamatlala
    @Nadiamatlala 3 года назад +12

    You and Jesus must be in same Watsapp group because that’s what He’s been telling especially in this season 🙌🏾 He always does confirm His word ❤️ Thank you

  • @bellainbuenosaires
    @bellainbuenosaires 3 года назад +1

    Thanks for sharing. I can relate (except for the being married part)🙈. It's good that God doesn't give us everything we want when we want it. It's not easy to wait but it is important to wait.

  • @odreamsdreams6230
    @odreamsdreams6230 3 года назад +2

    *Things I got wrong by Melody*
    1.Not being obedient
    2.I let loneliness being my driving force
    3.Being so impatient
    *Things I got right by Melody*
    1.Very upfront and vocal about my relationship with God
    2.Being upfront with my desire to wait until am married
    3.Allowing my friends to hold me accountable

  • @boitshokobuthelezi8469
    @boitshokobuthelezi8469 3 года назад +2

    Thank you for vulnerability, you're helping so many people