Specific Boundaries, Staying Hopeful, S*xual Desires, Shame | Christian Dating Q&A | Melody Alisa

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  • Опубликовано: 23 дек 2024

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  • @MelodyAlisa
    @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +43

    hey, sis! In the comments, let us know where you are in your relationship journey! Are you in your single/ waiting season? dating? engaged? or a fellow member of #teammarried? rolllll calll!

    • @oneof7billion627
      @oneof7billion627 2 года назад +8

      Waiting: Praying. Trusting. Hoping. Believing. Living lovely in the meantime.

    • @Tyra-EIL
      @Tyra-EIL 2 года назад

      I am in my single season , it’s been 1 year and honestly sometimes it can be really tough, but when I remember how the lord speaks to me , how my relationship with him has growth I do think it’s better I wait and stay patient 🙏🏾😊

    • @missmiinnieme
      @missmiinnieme 2 года назад

      I am in my single & waiting season currently, and I am so grateful for your content. Your videos are really helping me get through this season and grow closer to the Lord. ❤️🙏🏾

    • @mariahornage527
      @mariahornage527 2 года назад +1

      I am a divorced mom of three adult children. My ex-husband left when my children were 1, 2 and 3 years old and I never remarried. I married and divorced before I accepted Christ. While I wish I could have met someone to assist me in raising my children, my hope now is that 2 of my children will meet someone who loves the Lord, as one son is married with a family. I pray for my sisters in Christ who never married but hearts still beat for the loving relationship you and others have found! As for me and my life (house) as a single person, I will continue to serve the Lord.

    • @erdinadavids6033
      @erdinadavids6033 2 года назад +3

      been waiting for my BOAZ to find me, its been a looooonnnnng wait though lol still trusting and praying on it.

  • @PrettiLee
    @PrettiLee 2 года назад +564

    I’m 33 and waiting for marriage. I’ve kissed a lot of frogs and no longer want to give my body to someone who will not be my husband. I am so nervous and afraid of ultimately ending up alone. But I’ve tried to do it for so long without God and it hasn’t worked! Im learning to trust God and am building my relationship with God during my single season. It’s not easy but I’m learning to trust God more and more everyday. We cannot put limitations on God!

    • @mwitwamwelwa4850
      @mwitwamwelwa4850 2 года назад +17

      This is exactly my situations am 33 turning 34 soon, I thought of been alone is scary. God help us

    • @Ellenelcyy007
      @Ellenelcyy007 2 года назад +15

      Girl yes ! 33 as well . Like I literally be in my head about being single forever .

    • @doneciadavis7717
      @doneciadavis7717 2 года назад +12

      Yessss girllll!!! Every word you said!!! I'm 33 as well. Lord help us all to remain faithful and true towards our walk in you CHRIST JESUS 🙌🙏

    • @mariahornage527
      @mariahornage527 2 года назад +9

      I know that you know in your heart you believe in God and His promises. You are a "gift" from God and your body should not be "unwrapped" until your wedding night...Until the man finds you, continue to be a blessing to those who are around you and I know that you will attract that person one day. But you must be happy knowing that single or married, you will not lose your faith in God. Jeremiah 29:11 all day long.

    • @Redrover14
      @Redrover14 2 года назад +7

      Amen sister, I've had two relationships before coming to Christ and they failed miserably. This world teaches us so many lies on what love is and the idea of finding "the one", and I was searching for it in all the wrong ways. I am now unlearning all these worldly things and following the Lord, saving myself for marriage and seeking to glorify Him. Now my focus is no longer on finding "the one" but on finding how much of a blessing it can be to be alone and walking with Christ.

  • @HeyItsMaori
    @HeyItsMaori 2 года назад +351

    My boyfriend and I often say these desires aren’t bad they just aren’t needed now. There is a time and place for everything and right now we are focusing on building a God centered foundation.

    • @trinitylawrence5099
      @trinitylawrence5099 2 года назад +17

      I really love that form of phrasing!!

    • @emilystardawnn
      @emilystardawnn 2 года назад +2

    • @HeyItsMaori
      @HeyItsMaori Год назад +6

      @@SpokenTruth-ld4eg I don't plan to take forever but I believe God brought us together so I am doing my best not to rush into marriage. And we are doing our best and deciding not to do married things until we are married.

  • @Redrover14
    @Redrover14 2 года назад +232

    Wow, when you said that these desires are not something to be ashamed of, my eyes welled up in tears! Because I have been feeling ashamed...I've struggled with sexual desires since I was very young, and dealt with masturbation and engaging in sexual intimacy with men in the past. Now that I am in my single season again, I am leaving it all up to God and I vowed to let Him guide me to my husband. Now I don't struggle with masturbation anymore, but after catching feelings for another man at my church, I found that I still struggle with sexual desires. The enemy has been tempting me in my dreams and whenever I would think impure thoughts about him, I would catch myself and feel so terrible. I cried the other day while praying because I knew I was following the same thought patterns from my sinful past and felt so guilty, I begged God "Please Lord, don't allow me to sin against you. I don't want to let another man come between us, I want to desire only You!" So this video is a huge comfort to me, because it's basically God saying that He doesn't condemn me for feeling things that He created me to feel.

    • @artforchrist5065
      @artforchrist5065 2 года назад +21

      You’re not alone sister. ❤️ We got this through the power & grace of the Holy Spirit! God knows we don’t want to burn with lust or passion & he doesn’t want that for us either so I’m believing he will send our husbands sooner than we expect. God bless you!

    • @Itsthanyaroyale
      @Itsthanyaroyale 2 года назад +13

      I have a similar story & I am glad that we are not alone. Thank you for sharing because this help me because I too struggled w/ soo much shame & guilt

    • @yasheekapalmer410
      @yasheekapalmer410 2 года назад +30

      I deeply relate to this. I am a virgin at 27 but I have crossed some lines with sexual intimacy. God in His grace stopped it from going all the way. Sometimes I feel tainted and not as "special" and set apart. I currently struggle with lust and masturbation. It makes me feel like a monster who objectifies men in my mind. It really disturbs me. I was on a streak and then fell back and it's been a struggle clawing my way out. I know that it hurts God, makes me ashamed and guilty and will make it harder for me to receive full pleasure from my husband when the time comes but it's so hard to get out of the cycle. But God specializes in what is humanly impossible. I am holding on to that.

    • @simiohh
      @simiohh 2 года назад +14

      Please continue to encourage yourself in Christ and remind yourself of the ways He’s helping you make progress. The fact that you no longer struggle with masturbation is such a huge step. Sometimes healing/Godly transformation takes place in layers.

    • @Redrover14
      @Redrover14 2 года назад +3

      @Tyler Lee Thank you so much! Im getting the sense that these feelings I have for this man serve a purpose, whether he is the man who is to be my husband I'm not sure because these feelings are new and unexpected. I'm praying for confirmation and for God to lead the way 🙏

  • @Heart3019
    @Heart3019 2 года назад +167

    Single, waiting and preparing. Sometimes I’m content in this season and sometimes I’m aggravated bc I’m like okay Lord where is he I’m ready to share life in the boundaries of marriage u know. Thanks Melody for the word

  • @rubyb7071
    @rubyb7071 2 года назад +67

    I’m 38, and #teammarried! I’ve been married for 10 yrs. I remember when I was single I focused on the Lord, There are sooooo many things you will not have time to do as a married person. Marriage is great, but my hope for all women is that as you are single you allow yourself to know yourself better while you have time to think through without a husband and kids.
    To help myself stay holy I would dress modestly and I would leave his place before 10 pm. I treated myself like I was in high school again lol. But like Melody says, draw near to the Lord and he will draw near to you. Be blessed ladies! 🙌🏾

  • @polescodes
    @polescodes 3 месяца назад +6

    I’m turning 35 and single. I told the guy I’m dating I want to abstain but we were intimate once. Once I sent my boundaries he’s been no responsive and I’m grateful. God is sparring time from heartache and I’m blessed in every other way so I won’t make a man my idol.

  • @DMarrettTV
    @DMarrettTV 2 года назад +63

    I'm 32 y.o. Man. Single. Feeling alone in these comments but it can be super tough to stay strong and outta these streets. I'd like to be married soon. I pray for the encouragement and strength of all the virgins who are losing hoping.
    And just all the people who want to honor their temple. Thank you for making this video.

    • @amaragrace94
      @amaragrace94 8 месяцев назад +3

      Just know you're not alone. Look into men's fellowship at your church. Remember the Holy Spirit, our helper and comforter is always there for you. I hope one year later you have learned more about yourself, grown in the Lord, grown in other areas of your life, and learned more about what you desire in a future wife (deal breaker must haves vs preferences) and marriage. May God bless you and guide you. Keep putting yourself out there and getting to know people. If it is in His will for you, it will also be in His timing. So you've got to trust in His plan because often times it looks nothing like what we imagined for ourselves.

    • @DMarrettTV
      @DMarrettTV 7 месяцев назад +2

      @@amaragrace94 appreciate this comment & envouragement. Def been tryna establish some type of accountability. Idk if I'll find that at my current church but I have talks with friends about it. I haven't had sex since that comment but I've had other "solo slipups", usually stress induced. I come across more Christians than not that are not taking their purity seriously. It would be cool to have person(s) I could walk this out with.

  • @AnnAnn-gz2ux
    @AnnAnn-gz2ux 2 года назад +119

    Hello beautiful Melody! I thank God for sending me here. I just love your videos. I was in a relationship for 15 years unmarried. We have five children together. I have also had other sexaul relations. Unmarried. The Lord told me this year, it was time to stop doing things my own way. The sexual desire and the unhealthy relationships, etc. I was doing all of these things hiding from God. But I have finally turned over those wicked ways. I know the true love I desire only comes from the Lord. I have not had sex in three in a half months. All glory to God. Because this was not easy. But I finally had to take a stand. I am so thankful each day for growing and evolving in the Lord.

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +25

      Oh, sis!! What a beautiful testimony that is going to be on the other side of this obedience.

    • @AnnAnn-gz2ux
      @AnnAnn-gz2ux 2 года назад +2

      Oh thank you! Yes ma'am we will keep going in the name of Jesus!!! 🤍🤍

  • @MardiGrasMobile36613
    @MardiGrasMobile36613 Год назад +7

    I’m 50 & single. No one of value ever approach me. I don’t understand why I’m still single. The loneliness is overbearing at times but I’m not willing to settle. I am constantly praying to God asking him to allow me to accept that I might end up single for the rest of my life.

    • @Jabberwocky_McScrugel
      @Jabberwocky_McScrugel 2 месяца назад

      It's because no man wants to be patient, and men like me that are willing to wait get rejected by the women we love Christian or not.

  • @samantharassie4554
    @samantharassie4554 2 года назад +16

    I'm 26 years old.. I've never had a boyfriend or even had a proper kiss. I've chosen to honour God, myself and my parents. I also have a promise ring which my parents blessed me with at the age of 21. It was not imposed on me but we had a conversation about it before they got it.
    Its definitely not easy waiting and hoping and trusting that God is going to come through especially in the society we live in. I have seasons of loneliness and there are times when I'm filled with doubt.
    I desire a godly marriage, a healthy one, and I would love to be a mom. My constant prayer is that God would grant me the opportunity to be an amazing, wholesome and Godly wife to a man after His own heart.❤

    • @bubblegumprincess
      @bubblegumprincess Год назад +2

      I didn’t get my first kiss till 31 … I’m glad I didn’t go around just kissing randoms bc he was worth it.. hang on my sister ❤

    • @samantharassie4554
      @samantharassie4554 Год назад

      @@bubblegumprincess thank you so much for this.. I definitely needed it🥺 God bless

  • @AngieeShipps
    @AngieeShipps 2 года назад +57

    Love this video so much! I appreciate your honesty and transparency. I have been single since I was born. I never been in a relationship or had a boyfriend and I hope this doesn't sound weird but I am so thankful. I am thankful because God has hidden me and protected me from the wrong guys my whole life. In high school and college guys would show interest or ask me out and I would say no because the Holy Spirit told me this isn't the person I have for you. I messed up at 23 being friends with a guy I had a crush on and God told me to let go of the friendship and I obeyed. I realized it was so important to obey God in that situation. I have been praying for my future husband majority of my life and asking God to prepare me to be a Godly significant other and wife one day. I do have crushes so that's fun but learn not to fantasy about them and just respect them. I often pray over my sexual desires and just surrender them to God and not take them away. I'm enjoying my single season at 27 years old finishing up graduate school and working towards landing my dream job in the mean time.

  • @keishlyvazquez6100
    @keishlyvazquez6100 2 года назад +49

    I’m newly single after a relationship that I thought was it but wasn’t lol I’m of course not looking but learning to learn from my mistakes and use this time to discover who I am I’m Christ and how my God sees me ❤️

  • @sibesonangalelwa5228
    @sibesonangalelwa5228 2 года назад +12

    I am in my single, waiting and preparing season. I have left it all in God's hands, am tired of doing things my own way which never work out. I am trusting him to bless me with a Kingdom Marriage. I pray that he helps me stay faithful and patient with him. I really want to live a life that honours God.

  • @aleishahicks
    @aleishahicks 2 года назад +31

    I’m single, very much waiting… & I am not looking to date (because there are no prospects pursuing me). I’m one of those people that is wanting on God to bring us together and to be pursued. I’m trying to trust God in this area more bc parts of me are afraid… I don’t want to date the wrong people

  • @robinvanrensburg2565
    @robinvanrensburg2565 Год назад +13

    I’m 22 and I’m in my single season. 4 months ago I was in a relationship and my ex partner wasn’t saved. God spoke to me for longer then a year to leave the relationship, and I finally did. We were dating for 3 years and 5 months. Single season this far hasn’t been the best but I know it’s worth it. ❤️

    • @think8691
      @think8691 Год назад +2

      Can you please share how God spoke to you? Was it just a feeling on your heart you should go through with it? I’m going through a similar situation?

  • @mariahornage527
    @mariahornage527 2 года назад +30

    Thank you for this message. I remember someone said in a singles group that I was in years ago, "not everyone will get married" and while it seemed harsh, they were speaking in love. It took a long time for me to understand, and I have come to the conclusion that we need to find our joy in serving others, sharing His Word and whatever He has planned for us, we will accept AND be okay because God is in control.
    If we left this world tomorrow, unmarried, will we complain to God or thank Him for the people He put on our path to share His love.

  • @nothile
    @nothile Год назад +12

    I'm a 23 year old virgin from SA🇿🇦 and embracing my singleness. This journey has been tough but I know that the fruits of waiting will be rewarding. I know and believe that God has much in store for me and just like Juanita Bynum I don't mind waiting on the Lord. And sis your videos are amazing God bless you.❤️❤️❤️

  • @TinaLudidi
    @TinaLudidi 2 года назад +14

    I related so much when you said "what God has for you exists". I'm definitely in my waiting season, and one revelation I've received from God today is that I can trust Him even with my dating life. People around me are in serious relationships, and I've felt so hopeless because I'm always in the wrong relationships, and lately the guys approaching me don't align with God's will for my life. But I've had to remind myself that His plans for me are prosperous, so He will guide me through it all because the right guy does exist... It just isn't the right time for me.

  • @taylordavis4683
    @taylordavis4683 2 года назад +9

    Single!! Had a crush on this guy who doesn’t believe in the Lord and it’s so funny because in the video you talked about this, and you talked about free will. When I was praying to the Lord about this guy It really felt like God was saying “I mean you could have this, you could choose this but it’s not my best for you”. This video was so reassuring and comforting. Thank you! So on time! Made me so happy!!!!

  • @girlnamedrehoboth
    @girlnamedrehoboth 2 года назад +6

    I am certainly waiting but also feel very strongly that the man Abba has for me is literally around. I know I won't be single for long and this is me recording that in time. I'll be back a year from now and I'll be reading this comment in a totally different state of mind.

  • @tammylashe1019
    @tammylashe1019 2 года назад +31

    I am single and waiting, but get discouraged because I don't get out much and don't know how or if I would meet the man God has for me. The old saying is he's not gonna come knocking at the door so get up and get out. Idk what to think Melody!!! Thank you for this video it was encouraging.

    • @PoSHEmediaglobal
      @PoSHEmediaglobal 2 года назад +16

      Am in the same boat. I even quit remote working in order to get an office job so I get out more. I definitely feel trapped.
      The dating world is challenging. There aren’t that many godly gentlemen out there who are READY for marriage!

    • @tammylashe1019
      @tammylashe1019 2 года назад +4

      @@PoSHEmediaglobal I agree and I also work in an office setting that gets me out of the house but still no luck on dating. We're in this together!

    • @LoverofJesus26
      @LoverofJesus26 2 года назад +13

      I was thinking the same thing today! How am I going to meet this man if all I do is go to the grocery store and back home 🤣
      But God reminded me of Rebekah. She went out to do her usual chores and bam! She ran into a man who came to bring her to the husband God had for her, Isaac.
      We don't need to worry, God has a way of getting us to where we need to be, to meet whomever we need to, at just the right time.
      He is our limitless waymaker ❤️

  • @naomingwono1606
    @naomingwono1606 4 месяца назад +2

    I trust God to bring my way someone who wont lose interest when I tell him that I'm waiting

  • @chizzyjacinth260
    @chizzyjacinth260 2 года назад +13

    Reading through all the comments and I'm so grateful for you all❤️ I'm in my early 20s, single and not 'really' searching;8 months celibate and counting..while channelling my energy to some other things;I trust God to bring my Boaz at the right time. Shout out to you Melody.. you're my biggest inspo on this journey!

  • @sarasland8755
    @sarasland8755 2 года назад +5

    I believe you hit the nail on the head when it comes to turning the switch off to sexual desires because if a person can't control it, it can manifest into lust and when a person masturbates the spirit gets drained and eventually becomes empty and then a person will look up and wonder why their prayer life is in full like they wanted their not getting fulfilled spiritually like they want to

  • @peaceful22023
    @peaceful22023 Год назад +2

    Great job with this information!
    Reasons You May Still Be Single:
    A) 'Unequally yoked' unions causes conflict & heartache. ID a person on your spiritual level.
    B) Rejection of Godly advice will lead to regrettable decisions.
    C) Recover from past traumas. Then enter a new relationship.
    D) Prioritize your friendship first. Save sex for your marriage bed.
    E) ID the red flags and move on.
    Beware of these 15 Red Flags that he discussed:
    1) Lack of honesty. Integrity.
    2) Lack of prayer & spirituality.
    3) No physical attraction.
    4) Lack financial responsibility.
    5) Not emotionally balanced.
    6) Failure to commit to you.
    7) A narcissist. Selfish. Evil.
    8) A control freak over your life.
    9) Extreme criticism about you.
    10) No freinds, social skills, etc.
    11) Anger and abusive issues.
    12) Low self esteem.
    13) Co-dependent personality.
    14) Cannot resolve conflict.
    15) Aggressively jealous. Steals your freedom. Boring.
    Marriage is not designed to be a jail sentence. Instead, a Godly experience with a 'lifetime mate' to navigate through life together. Choose wise. Because marriage is truly a God thing! ❤

  • @elohoroghorodi196
    @elohoroghorodi196 Год назад +5

    I’m turning 28 soon and single. This video really encouraged me and I’m trusting God to get in right in dating and marriage.

  • @tarahjeannot
    @tarahjeannot 2 года назад +7

    I am currently in my waiting season. God has thru dreams and several confirmation revealed my future husband to me.Exciting and scary at the same time! The process has been hard, lots of ups and downs but God has been shaping me in terms of my patience, faith and trust in Him. Can’t wait to share my testimony. Awesome video as always Melody, thank you!

    • @oalatishe
      @oalatishe Год назад

      That is exciting, just keep your flesh in check and don’t start idolizing like I did 😅

  • @brittanybradley5389
    @brittanybradley5389 2 года назад +1

    S3x and the single girl is a really good resource for Christian women trying to navigate their s3xual desires in God honoring ways while also not attempting to "turn it off". It was super helpful for me and the woman who wrote it is a Christian psychologist.

  • @kenadysanaa
    @kenadysanaa 2 года назад +5

    I’m currently dating after a year and a few months of believing and waiting on God to bring a godly man into my life and while writing in a prayer journal for my future husband. Me and him started off as friends for months - having so many conversations about the Word, watching sermons and discussing them all of that, and it was unexpected when we both realized we became interested in one another in a romantic sense. Since we’ve been dating long distance for a few months (not in a relationship yet), it’s been a journey for sure on navigating how to honor the Lord with purity. I love how you said in this video it’s not about how close you can get to the line, it’s about how far you can stay away from it. I NEEDED TO HEAR THAT!! Bc that’s been a struggle with not getting close to that line. So thank you sm for this video 💕

  • @BlackDiamond8724
    @BlackDiamond8724 2 года назад +6

    Thanks so much for this video!! I am currently in my single and waiting season. I have decided to wait for my husband this time around. The last times I was in a committed relationship and both times felt like I gave away a part of me that I can’t get back. Only the man hand picked by God deserves that gift. I know it will be worth it. I have desired for a long time marriage and children, to pray for each other and to work through things with God in the center. He was missing in both of my relationships and I don’t want him to ever not be apart of it again. So many of the questions I could relate to also! Looking forward to your next video.

  • @krupaabrokwaa
    @krupaabrokwaa 2 года назад +37

    Sis is looking absolutely gorgggg! 🤍🤍

  • @biblestudyqueen20
    @biblestudyqueen20 2 года назад +20

    I was dating and living with my boyfriend for 2 years before I was too convicted to keep fornicating. He felt like I was being manipulative because of the seemingly sudden decision. Also I turned the sexual part of my brain off during the waiting season and still struggle as a married women. Def still working through that 2 years later

    • @ayannamarie123
      @ayannamarie123 2 года назад +8

      That is a fear of mine that I turn off the sexual part of myself until marriage and that in marriage I would struggle with turning it back on.

    • @ajordan1847
      @ajordan1847 2 года назад +4

      This concerns me, too; once I get married. Praying for you.

  • @Itsthanyaroyale
    @Itsthanyaroyale 2 года назад +14

    Hey Melody, thank you so much for this video! Every time I would get sexually desires I would either try to turn it off or say no I’m waiting for marriage. But it’s hard & I feel like I should have such a pure mind. At times I even hate that God gave me these desires because it’s so much emotion in trying to control it in my single season

  • @shaverim_
    @shaverim_ 2 года назад +6

    Ty for this Melody. Something I took away was that if both people are pursuing God first with all their heart then both can be at peace as they discern the relationship together. Amen! Oh and I’m in the waiting season and to be honest I’m trying to soak every second up because I imagine I won’t have nearly the same time to fill my life the way I am now once I’m a wife and mom. Peace 🕊

  • @GodlyWarrior_
    @GodlyWarrior_ Год назад

    Year 5 of my single season y’all 😅 but I have only walking with the Lord for the past 3 months. I really tried to approach the world with my understanding and what I thought I needed/wanted but no one even came close to filling that void so I talked myself into singleness and independency. Now I’m opening up to the Lord, letting him fill me with his word, promise and purpose, and I just trust that the right man will fall into my life seamlessly and he’ll be a support my walk with God.

  • @kaylanfomby7506
    @kaylanfomby7506 2 года назад +16

    Oh man I just commented a question in the thread only to find you just posted the q&a😭 bummer but thanks for being so honest and encouraging!❤
    I'm single just out of college, in a situation where I have feelings for someone who might return those feelings, he loves the Lord and really desires to honor God in all things but it's hard to tell if he has a desire to be with me or not!
    We've been friends throughout college and right now though apart we're closer than ever before. I'm not ready to date and neither is he so I'm just trying to navigate how to guard my heart while also walking in friendship wisely w him. Currently seeking the Lord on the timing and necessity of confessing feelings!😪

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +5

      hopefully i answered one close to yours! let me know :) more than happy to film a part 2!

  • @YasmineM80
    @YasmineM80 2 года назад +159

    As a 42 y.o. virgin who wished at a young age to have s3x until marriage, I’m officially starting to give up.
    I don’t know many women in my age group who knows what this feels like. I’ve dealt with a lot of humiliation, including from self-ascribed Christian men who believe 40+ women who are virgins are a red flag.
    Going into 2023, I feel like there’s a strong chance I’m going to break my promise to my Creator, because it seems utterly pointless/hopeless at this point. I’m going to watch your video a few times, as it came at the right time. Thank you. 🙏🏿

    • @aleishahicks
      @aleishahicks 2 года назад +84

      Hi love. I will be praying for you!! I just wanna tell you that your wait is not pointless and I encourage you to keep waiting mama!!!! We usually get the most tired when the finish line is right around the corner. Nevertheless, you are stronger than most people I know. God has sustained you in waiting for marriage thus far for a reason and I pray He keeps you sustained in peace until your husband walks right up to you. Sending love and support through prayer sister ❤️

    • @oneof7billion627
      @oneof7billion627 2 года назад +42

      Hold on pls...Ps.84:11. It's a trick of the enemy. Read Sarah& Hagar s story. He doesn't work in man s time. You are NOT alone even though it truly seems like it.

    • @artforchrist5065
      @artforchrist5065 2 года назад +33

      You are very special, & it will take an extremely special man of Christ to be yolked to you as your husband.
      I know it’s easier said than done but, don’t give up!!! You have something priceless & it is not worth the trash that is in this world. Don’t allow the enemy to trick you into something you may likely regret.
      God hears you. 💗

    • @Jstwatching
      @Jstwatching 2 года назад +37

      While I can definitely understand your frustration, you are to be applauded!!! It is not worth it (doing “it” outside the will of God). Trust Me. I know a lady that got married in her 40s, they both waited all their lives. She said it was totally worth the wait. Hold on sis!! It’s coming!

    • @coralieonguele3640
      @coralieonguele3640 2 года назад +3

      Hi beautiful Yaz , im praying for you !! And i can feel what you feel !! Stay strong God will surprise you with a man of God 😍🌹

  • @jaleesafelter7099
    @jaleesafelter7099 2 года назад +7

    Your video's are so amazing and i am right now in my single season and need to learn to love me first and then the rest will come! As i waiting i want to build my relationship with God

  • @roselineuiras8603
    @roselineuiras8603 2 года назад +4

    This was so helpful, I'm in my waiting season and i won't lie it’s not that easy but I'm trusting the FATHER's timing for me. Just to know that I'm not alone on this journey is encouraging me to hold on to GOD and HIS word that HE will bring to pass in our lives. Thank you Melody

  • @MrEugene13
    @MrEugene13 Год назад

    Single season 5 years into my celibacy. It’s certainly tough and I have my moments but doing my best to stay focused on pleasing God

  • @robinw7364
    @robinw7364 2 года назад +3

    I'm so glad I found your channel. I really need to hear how to continue to grow my relationship with God while I'm in my waiting season. I know I can trust him.

  • @Martina_E
    @Martina_E 2 года назад +6

    I agree what you said about therapy and understanding your beliefs

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +3

      Yes!! It makes such a difference!

  • @ZisCorner
    @ZisCorner 2 года назад +9

    This was good! Im in my single but do not have the desire to date season!

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +3

      love that for you sis, enjoy it!!!

  • @asiajana4314
    @asiajana4314 2 года назад +1

    I am in my waiting season. God is using this time I think to prepare me, hopefully, one day He will let me know when can start dating.

  • @allofdestiny
    @allofdestiny 2 года назад

    Beautiful video & great advice. I’m single & waiting❤

  • @oneof7billion627
    @oneof7billion627 2 года назад +4

    Tysm Jesus. Tysm Melody. Blessings to Blessings to you and the incredible ministry.

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +2

      🤍🤍🤍 thank you for being here!

  • @debonaesimpson3742
    @debonaesimpson3742 2 года назад +2

    "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"
    2 Corinthians 6:14 NIV.
    Perfect scripture to answer the third question. If you are already in an unequally yoked marriage, yes indeed, keep praying and trying to get that person to receive salvation. The Bible indeed also states that if an unbeliever wants to stay in a the marriage with a beliver, they can, so the marriage automatically just ending isn't the only solution, keep praying for that person to turn over their life. But knowingly getting into it, is indeed a sin and really highly not recommended. I've been there before really liking and being in relationships with guys that were non belivers and I really have to thank God for pulling me out of them. God's way is best sista, God's way is best. Love from Jamaica 🇯🇲. God bless.

  • @aleciavasquez3677
    @aleciavasquez3677 2 года назад +4

    I am 29 and contently single lol. It’s tough though because I’m nervous about the transition to being in relationship again when God calls me to my spouse. For pretty much ever I’ve always had either a crush, significant other or situationship type thing, but it’s been a nice vacation from boys for the last couple years as the Lord has called me to focus on my studies and important goals that fell by the wayside when not focusing on my singleness. It is interesting though as the Lord has been prompting me to watch sermons and leading me to verses about Godly relationships so we shall see. But I definitely am nervous about my ability to surrender my ways and compromise with my husband when God United me with him also I am nervous about my ability to resist temptation when it presents its ugly self to me, since I’ve been very single, I haven’t had any need to resist, so I’ve been praying that God gives me the fortitude to obey his command of celibacy

  • @valerieeey
    @valerieeey 2 года назад +4

    Your videos are always so timely, it’s crazy 🙌🏾

  • @keystothekingdom0293
    @keystothekingdom0293 Год назад

    Thank you for sharing this topic. I addressed dating and the red flags that you may experience with dating. This topic is certainly something that is needed.

  • @Jarnell_m5
    @Jarnell_m5 2 года назад +7

    Single and waiting for marriage ♥️ my desire for marriage gets stronger and stronger

  • @eyethumfazwe
    @eyethumfazwe 2 года назад +1

    Thank you for sharing. If God leads you to talk about navigating unemployment and job hunting, I'll definitely watch it. I also look forward to more story times, the one you did on Sarah was so good and I'll definitely watch the other one. You are a blessing in this world. God bless you and yours

  • @jasnajasmine7872
    @jasnajasmine7872 2 года назад +6

    Love your videos. I m in a godly relationship and we both want to save ourselves for marriage. Please say one prayer for us, to have strenght and stay on the Lord s path.

    • @chizzyjacinth260
      @chizzyjacinth260 2 года назад

      May God's grace be sufficient for you both, Amen❤️

  • @MarkieYoung
    @MarkieYoung 2 месяца назад

    Single, divorced. I married before coming to Jesus and it was a pretty awful experience. I love the perspective of having the desires in an open hand lifted to the Lord. I cannot relate to the "just turning off" the sexual desire part though. Good for you. That has been a definite challenge for me. My body definitely has NOT turned off. I have no issues around men, but I really struggle just being by myself. I cannot pray out of it. I can lose sleep over it. It has nothing to do with thoughts it is completely and solely physical and it manifests itself any time. I tried making myself so busy that I was just exhausted before bed, but that only half worked and only for a while. There is really no escaping it for me. I have surrendered my sinful nature to the Lord and I pray that He helps take that from me or provides me with a husband.

  • @chaela1937
    @chaela1937 2 года назад +1

    This video gave me confirmation on a revelation God gave me a week ago today! You literally spoke the exact phrase I wrote down about this revelation! I thank God for you and your words of encouragement!!!! ❤️❤️❤️

  • @missmiinnieme
    @missmiinnieme 2 года назад +1

    I am currently in my single & waiting season, and I am so grateful for your content. Your videos are really helping me get through this season and grow closer to the Lord ❤️🙏🏾

  • @daise19
    @daise19 2 года назад +2

    38 and waiting on marriage, it's discouraging, to say the least. I tried online dating and met some solid dudes. None of them had a submitted relationship with God. Most of them respected my wishes to wait until marriage, but it wasn't a lifestyle they were open to. I'm in Florida it's tough here. I've been asking God for marriage for 10 years....idk what's going on at this point 🤷🏿‍♀️

    • @prrophetjonathandzugba9246
      @prrophetjonathandzugba9246 6 месяцев назад +1

      GOD IS FAITHFUL, HE NEVER FAILS.
      MAYBE IS TIME TO LOOK OUTSIDE YOUR FAMILIAR SURROUNDINGS
      THERE MANY GODLY MEN, LIKE MEN TOTALLY SOLD OUT GILCHRIST JESUS AROUND THE WORLD
      REMEMBER, WE'RE ONE IN CHRIST JESUS, NO BARRIERS IN GOD'S KINGDOM, SO LOOK BEYOND YOUR SURROUNDINGS
      BLESSINGS TO YOU

    • @daise19
      @daise19 6 месяцев назад

      @prrophetjonathandzugba9246 Thank you. I've matured since this post. I now realize God's timing is best, and at the appointed time, I will meet my future husband. I'm not even looking just enjoying God and what he has called me to do. God bless!

    • @prrophetjonathandzugba9246
      @prrophetjonathandzugba9246 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@daise19 Glory to God

    • @prrophetjonathandzugba9246
      @prrophetjonathandzugba9246 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@daise19 Glory to God. Blessings to you

    • @prrophetjonathandzugba9246
      @prrophetjonathandzugba9246 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@daise19 I want to introduce you to Apostle Arome Osayi
      I have matured tremendously by his ministry as a man of God.
      And his books has blessed me, the wife is an amazing woman of God also.
      You can find their videos online, it will bless you as you continue on your waiting and trusting on the Lord .
      Blessed are you

  • @emilystardawnn
    @emilystardawnn 2 года назад +2

    Omg and I’ve been praying for a Christian therapist. Wow thank you Jesus 🙏🏼🤍

  • @ayannamarie123
    @ayannamarie123 2 года назад +3

    Can you elaborate more on your answer to the last question. This very thing is one of my biggest fears. Ive been hesitant about going to God about my sexual desires while waiting because the easy way out would be to ask for suppression of these desires until I get married but I don't want to struggle with feeling sexy or have a mental block when it comes time to have sex when I finally get married because I suppressed these desires so much during the wait. I take personal pride in being comfortable with my body and being sensual and the idea that I would "lose" some of these positive attributes while waiting is so scary to me and has been a pain point for a while now.

    • @mshbk9794
      @mshbk9794 2 года назад +1

      God has not given you a spirit of fear but of power love and a sound mind.
      Leave it to God, speak the desires of your heart to him, he will listen and make it right in the end

  • @Bella4Chrissy
    @Bella4Chrissy Год назад

    For any sisters still unsure about the question of trying to make it work with an unbeliever, this is the most commonly cited verse on the subject:
    "14 Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?" -2 Corinthians 6:14
    Some translations say "do not be unequally yoked." Agreed with Melody that it wouldn't be wise to enter into, but know that there is a scripture that speaks directly to this. It makes complete sense when juxtaposed with verses like Matthew 12:25 "a kingdom divided against itself cannot stand"--different context but same principle. *Especially* as a woman, you'd be willingly allowing yourself to be led by a man who is not pursuing or emulating Christ, who does not acknowledge or feel held accountable by the biblical standard of marriage.
    Wait for the man that God would bring you, who is pursuing God above all else, even you. He's well worth the wait!

  • @natbat23
    @natbat23 Год назад

    I am glad I stumbled upon your channel. I have been single for a year now. I was engaged to my best friend and had to call off the engagement. During this season of singleness I am pursuing God more and more intentional about it. However I get lonely and crave intimacy. So I really appreciate you sharing these points on how to navigate 💛

  • @rosegreen8441
    @rosegreen8441 7 месяцев назад

    I'm done. I've lost all hope in this area and have bowed out. I just want to focus on parenting, having enough resources to be able to retire with dignity and to travel.

  • @adtsmj
    @adtsmj Год назад

    In. God honors your commitment and obedience and it WILL BE worth it WHEN the time comes unless He says otherwise. Stay hopeful God got us!!

  • @Momo_Mo781
    @Momo_Mo781 2 года назад +1

    Singleness be hard sisters, I agree but God wants us to stay close to him and make the most of this time alone without the duties of being coupled up. A little experience (although with faults) is showing me the time and energy I can use productively in the single season, it's hard but we come as singles on this earth so I guess it's the default so God is not crazy for allowing this season to exist....

  • @fameatabryant1041
    @fameatabryant1041 2 года назад +8

    Hi I've been reading a lot of the comments and Yaz M don't feel bad your not by yourself. I'm a 50 yr old single virgin who is still waiting on God to send me someone but don't give up on God or your virginity. It's a possibility that the one man that Goes has for you may not be ready so God is still working on him. And he also might still be working on you to prepare the both of you for marriage.

    • @yasheekapalmer410
      @yasheekapalmer410 2 года назад

      You guys are an encouragement to me to keep holding out. Sometimes i think i just won't be able to wait on God to provide.

  • @makalsiashepherd3275
    @makalsiashepherd3275 2 года назад +2

    Mel, thank you for sharing. Need a part 2 please.

  • @annamariamashauri7927
    @annamariamashauri7927 2 года назад

    Heeeyyyyyyyyyy Sisssssssss
    I'm 27 and single. Started my healing journey with Jesus.

  • @sindithabisilephungula8127
    @sindithabisilephungula8127 2 года назад +2

    Hi Melody. I’m a 24 year old all the way from South Africa 🇿🇦 I’m in my single season but I’m in a long term relationship. My partner and are celibate. It’s definitely not easy though but the boundaries we’ve set and the long distance help.

  • @christinaradebe4487
    @christinaradebe4487 Год назад +1

    I'm 30 😊 from SA.. And the dating life can be challenging child🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️
    But I trust the lord 😊😊 so much that I know my husband is out there working on himself with Gods help of course 😊

  • @mirahlachae
    @mirahlachae Год назад

    One of ur younger audience here 👋🏾. I’m 19 years old and I’ve had a few childish relationships but obviously nothing serious except for 1 person. I met this boy when I was 12 years old didn’t even bat an eye at him but one day my freshman year he had popped up and caught my attention I was at a different school so I ignored it but when I moved to the school he was at, it was like God himself said “he’s going to be very important to you.” We were dating for 2 years before I broke it off, I had absolutely no reason but did it anyway it has been a struggle since. I keep praying about it and God gives me signs but I’m so doubtful bc what he’s saying to me doesn’t match with reality. We started working on things again and it was getting very very good again and God whispered in my ear and said “tell him you need space” it’s only been a couple weeks now but I’m soooo confused. I don’t want to hold onto something that isn’t from God, I’ve been binge watching ur videos and it’s been matching with my situation a little bit like telling me things that God wants me to hear so now I’m starting a fast and just going to be patient and see what God tells me.

  • @jordanaqueen8213
    @jordanaqueen8213 2 года назад +1

    So currently I’m single and is in waiting season. The waiting is really hard because not only do I have the normal desire regularly but I also have dreams that temp that desire and it’s quite frustrating 😭😭

  • @AggieWes
    @AggieWes 2 года назад

    I thank God that made me come across this video. I am in my single season even though I have been through a lot and I am determine to walk this journey with the Holy Spirit guiding me each day. I must say that it is not easy especially when we live in the world full of shouting colours left and right, I realised that I have been trying to do things my way with the mindset that I could beat down my flesh but eventually it ended in disaster! I am waiting for that man that God has for me and while I wait, I am allowing God work on myself to prepare me for that man.

  • @jennifervillalpando3166
    @jennifervillalpando3166 2 года назад

    Hey Melody! Hey everyone.
    Right now I am a single mom of 3. Focusing on my responsibilities but feel like I’ve been waiting too long for my God given spouse. I don’t want just anyone and I don’t know how to date. So far the only relationships I have had so far have been led by flesh and not the spirit. Men leave the relationship early when I don’t give in.

  • @MoClaire
    @MoClaire 2 года назад

    Hi,am 34 yrs. Am single,waiting and preparing myself for marriage. Been through alot of relationships but I haven't given up .

  • @serena.24
    @serena.24 2 года назад

    I'm in my single season.I really want what God wants for me. At times I do feel pressure to be in a relationship but trusting God wholeheartedly in this area of my life.

  • @Nishaxo28
    @Nishaxo28 2 года назад +1

    Love the video. May we get a video on some prayers you used for unbelief and how you felt it helped during times where your faith was tested?

  • @casindraisenia9271
    @casindraisenia9271 2 года назад +1

    Great content, May God continue to bless your channel and family!

  • @DaughterofYah101
    @DaughterofYah101 2 года назад +1

    Thank you big sis love youuuu. Very helpful. Loved this sit down and talk video style

  • @taryndodds1390
    @taryndodds1390 2 года назад +11

    Needed this- Thank you! 🤍 you look beautiful ✨
    I am single and with no prospects on the horizon at the moment. I am in the season of preparation and growing in my relationship with Christ.

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +1

      so glad it was helpful sis! & thank you!

  • @GabiHume98
    @GabiHume98 2 года назад +5

    I'm 24, dating (on the path to engagement soon). I do feel more encouraged after watching this. Personally, I've been trying this switch off my desires thing from I started dating my boyfriend 5 years ago and its not a fool-proof plan. I have failed and made the bad decision to have sex with him but for some reason up until recently, I thought continuing to try to switch off my desires was the right thing to do. I realized how distant this plan has made me from my boyfriend, I wouldn't hold his hand, didn't necessarily want to hug or lay down next to him. I didn't know it came off as me communicating to him (unintentionally) that I didn't want to be around him, show him affection or wasn't attracted to him. None of those things are how I feel but its how my actions made him feel. I'm wondering now if there's a better way to approach this. (For additional context, we're currently in a season long-distance).
    Thank you for sharing sis, I look forward to hearing your perspective on things like this.

  • @shj221-m2y
    @shj221-m2y 2 месяца назад

    thank u sis for this we love and appreciate u so much may the lord continue to bless u from the crown of urhead to the soles of ur feet in our Lord and Savior Jesus Name we Pray AMEN

  • @rachousmile
    @rachousmile 2 года назад +1

    Thank you so much!!! It was so helpful.
    At the moment, I am in a "situationship" that I know I should walk away from BUT I just don't know how because:
    1- I don't want to break the heart of that person
    2- I feel like I am a way to bring peace into his life
    That is so weird because I want to leave so bad but at the same time I want to help him go through what he is dealing with so I can leave telling me "ok you did what you had to do"
    I do be bringing it to God but I feel like even if He tells me to walk away, my flesh just won't let me execute his will 💔

    • @hilarymasaraure3960
      @hilarymasaraure3960 2 года назад +1

      Heyy i been where you are till my pastor preached something along the lines of you cannot fix someone. Its the Holy Spirit who does that. You continu praying for the person when you have walked away.

    • @rachousmile
      @rachousmile 2 года назад

      @@hilarymasaraure3960 Thank you so much for your reply ❤
      I am going to pray about it because lately it has been eating me inside and I just don't want to step into 2023 knowing I'm refusing the will of God

  • @jessicajasson1872
    @jessicajasson1872 Год назад +1

    I wish I knew back then wut I know now about soul ties. I wud of abstained from sex a long time ago. The grace of Jesus upon my life, oooooooh Lord😭😭😭😭

  • @jadatownsend2108
    @jadatownsend2108 2 года назад

    Man, God knows what he is doing this video was so good and right on time!

  • @Naomibecks4real
    @Naomibecks4real 2 года назад +1

    You’re such a blessing! I love your channel!

  • @Xmlfelicity
    @Xmlfelicity Год назад

    This video helped me so much! I know God has made things clear to me but I question it bc I want an earthy relationship to work out & this gives me so much hope! This is such a great video & I’m so glad I came across your videos❤️ I can’t stop watching, thank you for sharing!

  • @DD-pv2jl
    @DD-pv2jl Год назад

    Keep in mind, men deal with this too. Also, your 3 or 4 years of waiting is nothing … try waiting 3 or 4 DECADES as some of us are doing … & still waiting!

  • @viviankatamunua9324
    @viviankatamunua9324 2 года назад

    Hi Melody. I thank God for your content everyday. God is using you to change lives.
    I am currently in my single and waiting as a believer but at the same time I re-connected with someone I had a fling with over 6 years ago, just shortly after I told God I am finally ready for my husband. He's been a believer longer than I have. The crazy part is; I specifically told God I want nothing to do with any of the people I.ve been with before (ex). I told myself this is the devil trying to stand between me and my destiny so I broke up with him as soon as we tried courting. But like you mentioned the voice is getting louder that I need to give him a chance at a slow pace, He also hears the same voice because he doesn't want to let go. Its a bit challenging to understand if its really God even if I said I do not want to be with an ex again.

  • @nadiasworld1514
    @nadiasworld1514 Год назад

    Just started my celibacy so excited about it. Glad I found this channel, I love it here. 😂

  • @siyamagalela6823
    @siyamagalela6823 2 года назад +1

    This video was everything I needed to hear and more! I’m single and waiting (some days I struggle with the waiting part).

  • @annatexas2974
    @annatexas2974 2 года назад +2

    Thank you for being open with your faith, I love you ♡♡♡♡♡

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +1

      thank you for being here sis!

  • @ajordan1847
    @ajordan1847 2 года назад +1

    Waiting🙏🏾❤ I am asking God to redefine my purpose as I wait.

  • @kellacanb
    @kellacanb 2 года назад +4

    If I may insert my two cents, something about the phrase "a woman saving herself for marriage" has always seemed inadequate or inaccurate to me for what people mean by it. It's a way to avoid using the word 'sex', but that's what they mean. A woman's whole self is not her ability or decision to have sex. I've always thought it was objectifying. You aren't "saving yourself" sis; you are choosing to be obedient and engage in the right behaviors at the right time.

  • @ChamaraFray
    @ChamaraFray 2 года назад

    Waiting season /season of singleness . God revealed to me who I would marry know I am in the journey of trying to stay focused & allow to better prepare me/ mold me into a woman of wife , mom , etc
    These videos have been very on time for me lately
    thank you for obedience ! Glory to God ❤

  • @8ThatUp2
    @8ThatUp2 2 года назад +5

    i’m in my single season and i’m enjoying it lol

    • @MelodyAlisa
      @MelodyAlisa  2 года назад +1

      yesss, i love to hear it! enjoy every minute sis!

  • @leenateepoo670
    @leenateepoo670 7 месяцев назад

    Amen 🙏 thank you sis am in my waiting Season I pray for God to sent Me the right person to married ❤

  • @ifeomabibiana6479
    @ifeomabibiana6479 2 года назад +1

    This was very educative,I have learnt a lot.Thanks Melody😘.

  • @HamiltonRowan-r6z
    @HamiltonRowan-r6z Год назад +1

    I'm not waiting, because I am not interested in dating!

  • @jessicawilona9594
    @jessicawilona9594 Год назад

    I’m crying🥺 Thank you for sharing