When it's best not to touch the deceased
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- Опубликовано: 16 апр 2023
- In this video Tracy explains that sometimes it's best that families do not touch their deceased loved one. Communication is key in these situations and complete care and respect from the funeral home in communicating the facts can ensure that a family's final goodbye is as peaceful and less traumatic as possible.
Don't miss our livestream coming up on Sunday, April 30 at 6am Brisbane, Queensland Australia time. We look forward to seeing you then :)
Til next time,
stay safe,
T&T xx
Contact us:
insta: @are_you_dying_to_know
email: areyoudyingtoknow@gmail.com
WARNING:
This video contains graphic material that may disturb some viewers.
It is not suitable for children. Viewer discretion is advised.
The views, thoughts, explanations and opinions expressed in this video belong solely to the presenters Tracy & Trish and not necessarily to their employers, organisation, or other groups or individuals.
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A close friend died in Paris, he was 84. It was amazing to see how he looked in his coffin, despite how terrible he looked in his last days. You deserve praise for your great work.
🙏💜
I know it's amazing how they make a person look just like they use to look like. I've seen it with my mom in her last days she did not look the same but at her funeral here in the USA she looked like she did when she was alive. I don't know how morticians do this but it's amazing.
My Dad was laid out on a big fat green body pillow on a guerney.
He was lightly made up with a slight smile, wrapped in lovely coloured sheets, maroon, soft green and white sheets, then a beautiful coordinating quilt.
He looked as snug as a bug in a rug, and as if he was sleeping.
He looked good, and he was under a beautiful stained glass window.
We were able to cry, speak to him, hug him, and stroke his head and arm.
I'm glad to have this memory. Not the least bit morbid and was very comforting.
Blessings to both of you for what you do.
Thanks for sharing such a beautiful private memory. Sending hugs 💕
I found a dead man sitting against a dumpster when I was 9, it's been nearly 40 years, i'll never ever forget it.
That would stay with you. So sad😢
I am so sorry you had to see that.
You ladies compliment each other beautifully. Thank you for sharing your knowledge so respectfully.
Thank you so much for your kind words 🙏💚💚
I was fortunate to see my Mom on Feb 17th. She passed on the 25th of Feb. I had already flown home. I would have loved to hug my Mom one more time. I admire you for what you do. Thank you. Yes, Mother's day wasn't a good day. Nevertheless, bought Mom a Mother's day card and put it next to her little Urn. Actually all of us girls received a little, urn with Mom's ashes as a keepsake. Most of her ashes are in a larger Urn in her home. In the in law suite, All the little Urns match the large one. What a brilliant gift.
We are so sorry for the loss of your mum. It is tough to go through. We hope you find peace in memories of her and the support of family xx thanks for sharing your story. 💜
Before my Mum died she begged me not to leave her in a cold, dark room on her own. I promised her I wouldn’t. I tried to insist to the funeral director that she come home immediately so that she could be with us, telling him that I had promised her. He said that she had to be embalmed because she had died with peritonitis. He pointed to my pregnant tummy and said “It could be harmful for your baby.” I had to agree, but I felt like I let her down. 😢
They brought her home the next day and we had her with us for two nights. It was important for me to spend that time with her because I didn’t make it to the hospital to be with her when she died.
The saddest thing was that she never got to meet her first grandchild, although she did know her name - Jessica. Mum said she would call her “wee Jess”, not knowing that she was not going to be around for my daughter’s birth.
💚💚 thank you for sharing 🙏 we both hope you are doing well take good care 💚💚
They broke the law embalming never required by law and if your in the us it’s legal to have your loved one at home so now you can go after the funeral home and they can lose there license.
And it likely wasn't harmful to your pregnancy.
I have never heard of a prepared deceased person placed on a bed where they could be touched or “cuddled” in a funeral home here in the US. They go in caskets. Very clinical here. Are they embalmed & stiff when people are lifting & hugging them? This info blew me away. You guys are so kindhearted there. I think the business here would freak at that prospect!
Hi Cyndy, I had never come across viewing in the bed until I worked for the family business where I am now (McCartney Family Funerals, look us up on Google, such a beautiful family to work for) as I worked in a big corporate company before it's like you say, no diverting from what's always happen for years viewing in coffins or casket. Family love the fact that they is no barrier around the deacesed. No most of the time the bodies are not embalmed that only happens if the family request this and the bodies won't be stiff as I would have massage all the rigor mortis out. Of course if the family prefers to have the viewing in the coffin or casket we will do that too, what ever the family wants or needs we will try our best to accommodate. Have a great weekend 💚💚
Not normal
Yes, not many places do this, we do and the family give us great feed back about how it's really good to get closer to the deceased loved one without a coffin or a casket been in the way acting like a barrier.
Thank you for your comment, take care 💚
In the US, it's called a slumber room. More popular prior to cremation where a casket is not necessary.
I live in TN in America & don't know if it was just this state that done this or not but back in older days they used to lay the loved ones out at home like in a casket somebody would make homemade of course in the living room & they would always be somebody in the family that would stay up round the clock till the loved one would be laid to rest & lots of times they would have their own family cemetary to .I still remember going to a few of them when I was pretty young maybe bout 5 or 6 & it would always just scare the crap outta me how sometimes their eys would pop open & one of the family would go close them again & try & put some kinda glue or whatever they had back in to the eyes to try & keep them closed again .@@Areyoudyingtoknow
I think that’s such a wonderful thing to have a viewing that way…..how comforting it must be for the family
Yes, very true. They are usually very grateful ☺️
I have learned so much from your videos things that you wouldn't even think of when a loved one dies
Hi, thank you so much 😊💚💚
When Mom and I somehow got onto the subject of burial attire, she mentioned that one of her aunts was buried in a silk nightgown & robe set, and it looked so natural and elegant that Mom wanted the same idea whenever her time came. When Mom's health started declining rapidly, she said she wanted a white or cream colored coffin and ordered a lovely aqua penior set with long flowy sleeves. A few months later Mom passed after a long battle with a very painful debilitating illness. The mortuary did a fabulous job with Mom and the aqua penoir made her skin glow. She looked so beautiful, as if sleeping peacefully without the pain she had suffered as long as I could remember.
Dad passed the next year, just two weeks after being diagnosed with cancer. He and my stepmom had been in an Old West reeanactors group, everyone dressed in their 1870s formalwear for the funeral and Dad was buried in his finest vintage "Gambler" style outfit. Dad looked so much like he was just sleeping, that one of my cousins said someone should toss a rubber snake into the coffin to wake him up (if only).
I'm so grateful to both mortuaries for their dedication to making both of my parents look as natural as possible, and their skill at concealing the harrowing effects caused by disease and medical interventions. It's such a blessing that the final images of my parents were more like a happier, healthier version of themselves, rather than the trauma surrounding their deaths.
Hi, thank you so much for sharing your stories and it wonderful to hear both your parents have been cared for will told respect and dignity and sounds so beautiful both funerals 🌹🌹
We are truly sorry for your losses 😞 take good care ❤️❤️
Yikes! In light of our recent bereavement, we have SO, SO much to be thankful for. I could never imagine not being able to touch or kiss my Mum. That said, our local Funeral Director has been in business since 1918, and, in my opinion, they have just got better and better. Thank you for another marvelously informative upload ❤❤❤
Thank you 💚
It makes me so happy to hear that other funeral home across the other side of the world are as kind, caring and respectful as the little family owned one I work in out here in Brisbane Australia. We both hope you are ok and if course we know it's very early days 😔 look after yourself sending hugs 💚💚
My 84 year old grandma was embalmed for her funeral. My young cousin went up to kiss her and touch her hand, and he was absolutely horrified by how she felt. I mean horrified. Poor kid, no one had explained to him what a dead, embalmed body feels like.
Oh no how awful for your young cousin. Hope your cousin is ok now 🙏 take good care 💚
I had the habit of patting my father on the shoulder in his later years. When he died at age 96 I did that at his wake and was shocked as to hard it felt.
I was 8 yrs old when my great grandfather passed; I had been with my grandmother (his daughter) during his illness and helped her take care of him. No one told me anything about after death. Nothing. I have a very distinct memory of touching his hand and in my 8 yr old naivete connected that he 'felt like cold fried chicken' and got in trouble for it. You know, that adult in public type of trouble where you get the look and the yank and the silent treatment. I think that bothered me the most, actually.
. J@@cherisenunez2530
Same here I was 7 when my gram died. The pastor told me I could touch her, she looked so pale and when I touched her fingers I flinched in horror. Sh was ice cold.😢
I thourougly enkoy the frank discusions about the process of death, dying and the way the conversations arent "dumbed down' thank you gurlz!
Thank you for watching ☺️
Take good care 💚💚
So pleased to watch your videos and you always answer the things I am interested in! Thank you both 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Your welcome, thank you for your kind words 🙏💚💚
For our young baby sister's mental health, my brother and I decided we'd have a "closed casket" funeral for our father, since it was three days after death in which he was found deceased...
There was no way he would resemble what he looked like in life, no matter the experience of those in the mortuary's "makeup department," so why risk our sister possibly having nightmares for life??
To each of his or her own, but that was OUR decision, and to this day, no one has regretted it.
We are so sorry for your loss. That's exactly the point, it is everyones individual decision. We just want to make sure they are not told they cant view if they feel they need to, wherever possible. 🩷Thanks for sharing your story xx
When my grandma died after a long illness the funeral home did such amazing work on her! I think part of it was her face had not been relaxed in years. She looked about 70 rather than 90.
Sorry to hear you have lost your grandma 😔 It's good to hear she was well cared for ❤️❤️
@@Areyoudyingtoknow ❤️
My mom and dad passed in the last three years. No embalming and quick viewing before direct cremation. I hugged them and touched them both. Very cold and hard but skin soft. I had not seen my mom almost a year on hospice as quarantine from Covid. Sad but my half hour with her gave me the chance to say good bye. Dad lived with me and got sick and passed in 6 days. Looked so well and peaceful. As though he was sleeping. You do a lovely service for grieving family❤
So very sorry for your losses 😞 sending you our deepest condolences 🌹🌹
Always be kind to yourself ❤️❤️
Hello T&T, Hope your both well. Thanks for another brilliant, informative video! ❤
Hi 😊 thank you so much as always 🥰💚💚
I almost missed this 🖐🖐🖐 . That would make me sad . I love , love ,love listening too ya'll. I like how Tracy pronounces words .👍👍. I live in Kentucky and we don't speak English , we have our own words and phrases that if you're not from here , you won't know what we are talking about. Ya'll look fabulous as always. ❤❤
Thank you so much Francis 🥰 yes lots of people find Tracy accent a little challenging 😉
It would be fun to sit around a dinner table with you and have a chat the 3 of us, we probably won't understand each other 😂
Take good care out in Kentucky 💚💚
Hey ladies! Another great video! Always informative, always beautiful ladies! ❤
Thank you so much! Kim 🥰💚😘
Thank you ,, once again ,,, have a perfect day .. love and Light to all
Same to you! And thank you as always Donna 🙏💚💚
I enjoyed the end of life doola videos. Love your shirt, Trish! Hi Tracy!
Thanks so much 😍 Tracy says hi 🙂 💚💚
I was brought up with death being talked about and treated as the normal progression of life - which it is! To sanitise and hide it away only instills fear. I live in the UK. I went to the funeral home to see my sister with her daughter a couple of years ago. We did her hair and the undertaker said it was unusual for anyone to do this. I come from a very large family and we used to keep our dead family members at home BUT, after the Doctor had recorded the death officially, the undertaker would remove, embalm and dress the body and put it in the coffin. It would then be returned to the family home. Visitors would come and see the deceased and cry and share memories and have tea etc. The room would be kept cold, full of flowers and the funeral would be held within 3 days. I am an old lady now and you never hear of anyone being kept at home after death. The wait for PM’s, cremation slots etc since Covid has increased the time between death and the actual funeral and to my mind, puts a lot more stress on families but it won’t change any time soon.
That's such a lovely thing to do for family. It still happens in some cultures, see our videos on the Maori culture with Chas, but yes, we agree with you. Death is a part of life and should be talked about more openly, which is why we have our channel. 🙂Thanks for taking the time to write to us. Sending love💜
@Areyoudyingtoknow loving the top!
I live in the UK what podcast can I listen too?
Great video as always
Thanks ❤
Would love to see a collaboration with “Ask A Mortician “ Caitlyn! Love both of your channels and not only how informative you all are but empathetic as well! @areyoudyingtoknow
💜thanks for watching xx
Your chat makes it what it is... great channel to watch.
Thanks Amanda, lucky, because we do love to chat! 😎💕
Hopefully you are both are doing well and Kal as well . A couple of times my family and I have gone to the funeral home to say our good byes to a deceased family members and related family . I have kissed the deceased on the head ,this has given me peace in a respectful good bye. .And hopefully the sunshine is still shinning over your both shoulders.👻❤
Thank you as always Wayne 💚💚
Yech!!! No kissing for me!
My humour is dark but I totaly respect your professionalism in your trade I could'nt do what you do and yes it's a job if thats the right way to phrase to see the awful things you see I salute you.
I know when my dad passed i was advised not to see him even though it was only a short time after his passing even though no trauma.
only found your channel by chance and will watch your vlogs.
Welcome to the channel 🙂
So sorry to hear you lost your dad are was not able to see him after 😞 sending our best, take good care 💚💚
Love your podcast and both of you lovely ladies❤
Thank you so much! So very kind 😘💚💚
evening ladies yet another fascinating informative video again I love all your videos
Thank you so much Natalie 🥰💚💚
Love yal's video's always interesting info thanks so much for sharing .Sending love from america .
Thanks for watching! All the way from America 🤗❤️❤️
Saying Hi from Boerne Texas. I have enjoyed learning so much from your programs.
Thanks for watching! Out in Boerne Texas ❤️❤️
Just stumbled into your video ladies, and I’m hooked. While I’m absolutely pro my own life, I have for the last five years, had a payment plan for my funeral (essentially to cover the cost of a hole and a box for when my time comes), it just makes sense no? The payment appears on my bank statement as FUN PLAN (merely an abbreviation). From curiosity my daughter, now 28 asked me what it was. After winding her up a bit for comedy value, I then just said “it’s my funeral plan payment”. She was struck dumb, she was upset and a little annoyed asking me why I needed that?! I explained I wanted to take care of it in good time so she and my son 24 don’t have to. The question I have is, how do I broach the subject with the big kids when it upsets them to think about it? Here in the UK we don’t talk about death or the passing of loved ones, our wishes etc. I truly believe they’d be horrified if I asked them to keep me at home, deceased in my bed until my funeral. I know it’s distressing for them to discuss but I’ve tried humour and that went down like a lead fart. Any pointers on a starting place please would be very helpful, after all, statistics prove that 1 out of every 1 persons WILL die. Thank you for the honest, open accounts you give on a subject that can be a terrifying thought 🤍
Please feel free to rabbit as much as you like. Love hearing you both. 😊😊
Awww thanks Gary 🤗❤️❤️
Thank you for another very informative upload. I went to a funeral many ago and where we had a partial viewing of the top third part of a beautiful young woman friend of mine who had passed. There was a glass cover fixed over her, so noone could touch her, only view her face and shoulders.
I think it was mainly because ( the Pathologist had performed 2 autopsies on her ) and in hindsight, I now understand her brain would have been removed, since a white scarf had been beautifully arranged around her head, and it was clear her fringe had been cut quite short ❤❤
Oh, that's sad. 💙
GREAT HUMANITARIAN WORK YOU DO.
Thank you 🙏💚💚
Thanks ladies
🤗❤️❤️
Thank you for a great video, love watching you both.... I have a question.... How did you both come together to produce these videos? To have a mortician and a massager, how did you both decide on doing these videos, and who's idea was it?
Oooh we've done videos on this before.Trish is a former journalist who had another RUclips channel - she pestered me and pestered me but I was reluctant to get Infront of the camera. After time we just got started, but gee I wasn't comfortable in those early videos 💐
Awsome video ladies 😊x hope you're well x ❤I've managed to put a picture of me and my lovely dad, as I'm not good with technology 😅😅, xNEVER GIVE UP NEVER GIVE IN WHAT YOU DO COZ UR BOTH AWSOME XXXX
Aww Lorraine, that's beautiful. We hope.you are well lovely, take care xx💕
I love your videos ladies.... you have your audio channels crossed on this vid... its so strange to watch with headphones on 🤪
Hmmm..how did we do that? I'm not sure I understand. Total amateurs here. Sorry if it was unpleasant but thanks for letting us know.🤷🫣💚
Not a Question about Mortuary science. But you guys are Funny, Good, and CUTE 🥺.
🤗💚💚
Hi from Canada love your videos
Hey there! Thanks heaps Tom, take care in beautiful Canada 😚💚💚
Oh Gosh i absolutely love that blouse with those green hypnotizing eyes😊😊
Oh thank you! ❤️
Love your chat!
Thanks lovely 💜
Veiwing on a bed is such a good idea! Never heard of it here in the US. And, I imagine, elderly people's asking can start out pretty fragile.)
Yes, it's not common here either but we do it and it's just that bit less confronting 💚
A former co-worker was from Sicily, and she said they did that with one of her elderly relatives.
At my moms viewing she was in her coffin. I think it would of been a sweet touch to see her lying in a bed. I've been watching a lot of your videos since she passed a month ago. Gives me some comfort thank you ❤.
Sending love to you xx
@@Areyoudyingtoknow 💕💕💕
Lol you guys are never rambling on with crap 💩 tho at least smell delicious 😮 Fascinating as ever. I believe with a fragile deceased person it would certainly take more delicate procedures plus more work or just a certain system in place...luv ya work TnT, but who wouldn't 😊
Awww thank you 😚 always so kind 💚💚
Just discovered your channel, going to binge watch your videos
I can’t pin point if you’re Australian or gordie 😂
From Birmingham,uk 😊
Hi Kerrie Ann, welcome to the channel all the way from Birmingham UK 😄 their is a lot of videos to watch 😉
Trish is the Australian and me (Tracy) I am from Co Durham UK so nearly a Geordie😉. Thank you & Take care ☺️💚💚
I think it is a shame that in Australia we still follow our English background of not viewing the body. This means many kids never encounter death and simply know that Granny and Grandpa, or whoever, just disappear and are never seen again. It is strange to me that America, also with much English heritage, routinely view the body, yet in Australia we have not had that custom.
Hi, we don't find that happening here in Queensland Australia we do lots of viewings for families we have a huge diversity in cultures that do. Thank you for your comments take care ❤️
❤ you ladies..
Hugs back to you Tiffanie xxxx
I love your cat blouse!
Thank you! 😊
I lost my Mum to cancer 17 years ago. I didn't go to view her body as i was scared of what it would look like. I said my goodbyes at the funeral. Something scary about a deceased person 😢
So very sorry to hear 😔 sending you our deepest condolences 🌹
Nothing scary about a dead body honestly ❤️❤️
thats reassuring, thanks. x
You are SOOOOOOO lucky that you have never seen a decomposed person up close. Once you get that smell in your nose...good luck getting it out.
Hi are talking about Trish not seeing a decomposed body ? Because I (Tracy) have seen and cared for many many decomposed bodies.
@@Areyoudyingtoknow LOL Sorry Tracy, of course I meant Trish. The follies of typing while thinking while watching while working. Sorry. 🙂
I never want to see a dead body especially not someone i love
You don't have to view a loved one in death if you chose not too. 💚
Trish,I thought you were going to school to be an embalmer,mortician ? A great presentation as usual ladies..
Hey Robert..that's Tracy, Trish - I'm a journalist and now therapist 🙂
What a great idea of putting the deceased on a bed !! I would have done this for my mother if it was offered in America.....
Yes it's much more personal and less confronting surrounded by a casket. Sorry to hear you have lost your mother 😔🌹🌹
Take care ❤️❤️
Nice hair Tracy🥰
Thank you! 🤗 💚💚
My aunt was laid out on a hospital bed like table covered up with a blanket even though cold air was being blasted on her. Sbe was cremated.
Great and interesting video ladies. I’ll bet there’s at least one person that would be curious and touch the body. That’s where you would want to have someone there to smack their hand and say no no no. Do you ladies celebrate Easter? If so, how was it and what kind of food and drinks did you have
Hi Neil, thank you. We had a few days off work for Easter but didn't go far it's to crazy out and about in the roads at Easter time here. Hope you had a lovely Easter 💚💚
Hey ladies you said about skin slip on the face about airbrushing and shaving. How would you do set the face thanks ❤
Hi, I would still set the facial features in the same way but when I clean the face I use a drying embalming based chemical this firms up the skin a little to assist when touching the face. But the less you can touch the skin on the face the better, so it's a fine line 😬 thank you for your question take care 😊💚
I know it's highly inappropriate, but you made me giggle when you said about the head falling off.
Hi Maree, it's not a statement you hear everyday 😉 it's healthy to giggle or would all be crying.
Thank you take good care 💚💚
I always kiss my loved ones on the forehead at the funeral! I have to explain that the person is at room temp and they aren't there anymore when my grands are there.
❤️❤️
New subscriber here, I'm from North Carolina. In the United States....How did you two meet,?How long have you two known each other?? Love your videos
Hi welcome to the channel 😀
We meet 10 years ago at our local parkrun 🏃🏻♀️ we are both runners and have been great friends since. Take good care out in North Carolina 💚💚
Thank you... Thank you for all you do.. and thank you for answering my questions.. I hope you have a wonderful week..
You too 😊💚
❤🎉
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A question regarding skin slippage: When a baby dies in utero and isn't delivered immediately the condition of that fragile newborn skin deteriorates so fast. If a baby is then delivered vaginally rather than cesarean he can look pretty beat up when he's born with skin slippage already happening. With grieving parents still needing to process the shock, it would be good for them to have time with their baby. As you've explained here, it would be better for the appearance if the baby weren't touched, but surely there is a need to hold and rock and cuddle. Is there anything you can do to secure the skin a bit so they could be handled?
Hi, yes we can treat little ones with a very mild Embalming wrap. Basically wrapping the body up for an hour with cotton that has been soaked in a very mild chemical this just firms the skin enough to be able to dress baby and nurse baby ❤️
I knw someone that's mom passed on there birthday 10 years ago my question is illegal to put the date of death the day after even tho it wasn't the next day
Hi Thai, hope you are well.
Here in Australia you do need the correct date of death on the death certificate, not sure of the laws in your country sorry.
Have a wonderful weekend 💚💚
In Scotland, 2 doctors have to certify death. No way would a different date of death be recorded
Is any of that leakage considered biohazard?
Hi, wouldn't say it was, as feces, urine and blood go down toilets in our homes. Thanks for your question take care 😊💚
I'm assuming (and could be wrong), that you're doing all this from the UK...
I 'm wondering why it takes so long for a cremation date in your country...
I'm from USA, and while in the UK (for other reasons), I was asked to stand in for a relative (who couldn't make it back to the UK) for their relative's cremation/funeral event -- which took place THREE weeks AFTER death!!
I admit, it was an amazing ceremony,m/ event, to include the all black horse-driven hearse, but it just took a too long of a time to happen.
Hi noninoni,
No, sorry, we are in Australia, not the UK and funerals here can be the next or two days if needed. In the UK the wait is generally because of the huge population in such a condensed space. You just have to wait your turn but if you are happy with a non popular funeral day ( ,like a thursday) it can usually happen sooner. Companies can only do so many funerals on one day. Thanks for your comment. 😁
❤❤🌹🌹😘😘
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Why not suggest using a Unionall ( plastic jumpsuit) when dressing a body with advanced skin slip or bad oedema?
Hi thank you for all your comments and I agree with them. Yes I do use unionalls when needed, we talked about these in other videos 🙂
I know you are been very thorough with all you comments and that's great. We do this channel not to teach people like yourself how everything works you know all the answers, I talk in layman's terms and a brief overview of what may or may not go on behind the mortuary doors. Again thank you so much for all you comments and advice 😊 take care ❤️
Do you ever feel that it hurts the body when entombing . Thank you Ss
Hi, I used to think like that when I first started this job but not now. I know these people have gone and I have to care for the body with care and respect ❤️❤️
Cling film works well 👍
☺️❤️
Hello Tracy hello Trish my name is Christopher Craig I am from Northern Ireland Downpatrick I would like to know on your next video do youse have a same as us in Northern Ireland awake for two days and a burial on the second day and how do youse come about that thank you❤️❤️❤️
Hi Christopher, yes some family culture do the same and take their loved ones home for a few days then have the funeral service after. Thank you for your question take care 😊💚
I am from the United States. Each family is different in regard to wakes, etc. It was very common to have two days of visitations and the funeral the next day. A lot of people are opting for one day wakes now. Others have a visitation on one night with two the next day and then the funeral the day after that. Some have cremations and then the wake. Some people don't have ANYTHING. They just cremate them and nothing else. My father's wake was held for one day four days after he died. He was buried at a military cemetery the next day; it was a freezing, rainy day with the recording of the bugle played at a staging area.
Intresting - have you ever had a body purge or extreme fluid seeping while there been a viewing ?
Hi Andy, yes it's happened only a few times but luckily before family have arrived. I have been setting up the viewing and moving the deceased into place when suddenly fluid appeared on the lips 😬 even though I have already aspirated and cleared as much fluid out as you can when you start to move the body it often brings up more fluid. In these cases it's easy to clean up clear the mouth and nose again. Thank goodness these cases are few and far between 🙏💚💚
@@Areyoudyingtoknow thanks , lucky you caught it in time
I am paranoid I all was check the body a million times before the family arrive for the viewing 😬
🎵Please release me; let me go...🎶
😊💚
i know this is morbid but....when a head has been detached....does that make embalming easier because the blood is pretty much all gone?? If you haven't seen decomp you should look up the people that donate their bodies to the forensics people....i think the state of Tennessee has one....I'm sure there are others
Hi Michael any type of damage to the body makes embalming difficult. Take care 💚
My mother was autopsied bc we had questions about her death. She was horribly misdiagnosed. I feel bad for whoever embalmed her. Her sclerotic veins would've been trouble too.
Do people do home funerals?
Hi Tracy, yes people still have funeral at their homes not to common but still happen. 😊💚💚
I was at one about five years ago.
Yes
My mom told me her father was waiked in 1940 at home in the living room. For some reason she still remembered having to have to scrub the kitchen floor.... don't know the connection as a main memory.
Hi tracy, yes home funerals are very common in Greece because its a belief that the deceased is going from their home to their last home... And it is something more spiritual...!!!
Just a thought, would you work be cut by quite a bit if no one ever viewed? Xx
Everyone I care for is always prepared if family are going to view or not. The reason we do this is one out of respect for the body (certainly not nice just to place a body in a coffin with no prep especially if that body is coved in purge) and become I have lost count of the amount of times family decided at the very last minute at the church or chapel that they really desperate to see the body one last time.
Thank you for your question take care 😊💚
@@Areyoudyingtoknow that’s a lovely response, I would not have known. Thanks for responding! You do a great social media job as well as your professional job! Xx
Awww thank you so much, so very kind of you ❤️❤️
11:45 to get to the question/answer.
They did 😁
Does Texas allow family to see cremations?
Sorry we have no idea of the laws out in Texas. We are in Queensland Australia 🦘 x
What about not touching the body cause of medical like covid or tb or other things
Hi, I wear PPE all the time because everyone could be contagious. Some families want to view, to have funerals and take their loved ones home. We are there to cater to what they need, which is why the job exists. 🌻
My father had goosebumps after he passed, is that normal? I was afraid he wasnt really dead, from massive stroke. Please answer. Thank you. 😮😢
Hi, we are so very sorry to hear you have lost your father 😞 sending you our deepest condolences 🌹🌹
Goosebumps are very common after death in lots of people. It's all down to rigor mortis settings in. Rigor mortis is a chemical reaction in the muscles, starting to stiffen you them up. The hairs on our arms and legs are attached to tiny little muscles and when the rigor mortis sets in, it pushing on them tiny muscles making them stiff and the hair stand up, so the body look like it has goosebumps. Thank you for your question take care ❤️❤️
@@Areyoudyingtoknow Gosh thank you so very much for putting my mind at ease. That has always bothered me.
With an edemetous body, have you ever used topical drying agents to assist with 'weeping' ?
Thanks in advance, homecare/hospice nurse.
Hi Susan, yes I do but the drying agents I use have some mild embalming chemicals in, not to be used on the living.
Thank you for what the job you do 🙏 amazing kind of people to do that kind of work. We take our hats off to you 💚 Take care 😊💚
I have a question..... If someone is cremated how do u know u got ur loved one and not someone else??
The process is all barcoded from the beginning to the end. So every single body has its own unique code along with their name for ID. ❤️
Those mangroves sound bloody freaky… poor goat 🥲
Definitely freaky at 4.30am on a dark morning 😕 we tend to run faster at that time of a morning through there 😝
Yes poor goat 😔🐐 💚
Tret, proper geordie pet 😂
🤣 totally, you can see take the girl out of the North East but you can't take the North East out of the girl 😉💚💚
I have no idea what you're saying.
Have you ever stopped anyone from seeing their deceased person?
I only advise not to view if I thinks it's to traumatic but I have never stopped a family. Thanks for your question take care 💚
Thank you for your quick response. My son was killed in a plane crash last October which a horrific fire. They had to i d the body at the coroners. They wouldn’t even let me see a finger.
Hi Stephanie, we are so very sorry to hear you lost your son in such a traumatic way 😔 please accept our deepest condolences to you and your family 🌹 so very sad.
I totally understand your pain of not seeing your son in any way possible after his death. This is a huge part of the reason I became a mortician as me and my family had the similar experience 😔 like yourself my mum was killed and was identified by police not the family and the funeral home flatly refused to let us even see her, even her hand. We were told the mortician was unable to do any kind of reconstruction to her head and face so said we could not see her at all, I am sure we could of held her hand for one last time, with the rest of her been covered but it was a big no.
This is why I specialise in reconstruction work to try my best to give the family peace of mind and to touch their loved one for the last time. I think that's the important thing and to know it is definitely them. This is why I would never stop anyone to view and after all we are just the caretakers, the loved one belongs to you not us.
If you are struggling and need more support I highly recommend seeing a grieve councillor, don't wait 10 years like I did. I do however now understand why funeral homes tell us not to view after caring for so many traumatic cases, it is extremely confronting. But know that your son would have been well cared for🌹 I really do hope I have not upset you any further 🙏 please take very good care of yourself and be kind to yourself too💚
My mother had a stillborn baby girl in 1963 a few years after I was born. Dad told me he wanted to see the baby but was advised by the funeral director not to bc she was in bad shape.
You ladies ever come to America
Hi Dave, we haven't as yet but maybe one-day 😊💚💚
Do people actually cuddle dead bodies?
Hi, yes they do. It perfectly fine to to so, once we wash and dress the body and ready for viewing the family can touch that person. Thank you for your question take care 😊💚
Please release me, let me go.
Love that song 😍💚💚
If you have to put a lot of extra time in , do you charge extra money to the family for this ?
Hi, no not in the funeral home I work in. But I can't say what other funeral Home would do and it extra charges are added. I have worked many unpaid hours too just so I can make sure I am not rushed when I have busy days. Thank you for your question take care 😊💚
@Are you dying to know? thanks
What if the deceased died from a highly contagious disease?
Thanks for your comment. We've done videos on this.basicallybwe treat everyone as if they are infectious until they are washed and disinfectant is used. After that we advise the family when not to touch but in the cases of known nasty like ebola etc, we don't even get the bodies in. They are cared for at death by special response teams.💜
Can you dress someone who was not embalmed after being in the fridge for 5 days without slippage?
Hi, yes i have done many time. Thank you for your question take care 😊💚
You guys are krazy at times but you have to be when you are talking about death. And then you have to have a laugh once in a while also to keep your sanity.
Hi Joy, yes life is so short try and enjoy every moment 💚 while we have a laugh and a joke it's never laughing at death or dieing just ourselves and crazy little things we get up too 🥰 take care 💚💚
Your viewing are on a bed ? How marvelous, homey etc… so NOT LIKE IN AMERICA. Any chance we could see your viewing room? Obviously without someone in the bed. Just lovely!
Hi, yes the viewing bed is always loved by the families because they can sit on the bed, get closer to their person it's very special. We have done videos on the viewing room but we can maybe revisit this. Thank you ❤️❤️
These women are funny haha
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What does decomp smell like😮???
Sometimes it smells very sickly sweet like rotten fruit 🍓
How long did it take you to get use to being a mortician? Thank you Ss
Hi, not sure how to answer that. Because some days a question why I do it when I have exstream trauma cases to care for, but most day it fine ❤️❤️
Interesting stuff, but if you want to continue with your videos you NEED to upgrade your audio!!!
Thanks for your input. That was an old video.
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Y'all talk to much. I wish you'd just get to the point. Trying to block you off my feed now geez
Thank you for your comments. We are not for everyone. Take care
Don't be so miserable just scroll on if it's not for you.
Thank you Sara 🥰💚
That was very rude and totally uncalled for!