Spot on Dr Hawkins. After 3 months, my abuser still has not said anything to me after catching him in a lie. Prior, he yelled at me as if I was accusing him of something. Unfortunately, I'm done. I was calm and direct. Limited no contact.
Thank you, doctor. I have been struggling with how to deal with the narcissistic and emotional abuse by being empathetic to his emotional state while also setting boundaries, respecting myself and preserving my sanity. What you said is great advice for doing so.
Coherency happens with a healthy person. This is impossible with an abuser. Their whole game is to be Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde all the while denying it...
I’ve been married for 24 years & I’m 65 years old, I’ve been blamed for everything that has ever happened, nothing I have to say matters because he already knows how I feel what I’m thinking what I did or didn’t do or say!!! So what can I do at this stage of the age? Please don’t misunderstand me, I am a certified mediator specializing in family dynamic & problem solving & yet I can’t resolve my own deal here, I feel like something I can’t explain….
A coherent story is his enemy, and when i would try to tell him that story, i would hear i didn't forgive, i am good at bringing old stories up, that his past will always follow him because of me bringing it up, or it wasn't as bad as i told it, i exaggerated the whole thing. I do have a question though: could there be a link with forms of autism and narcissism?
But talking about it isn't going to happen..if it is spoken it's not the person doing the damage that will ever come clean with a story ... so change will never become a possibility.
Spot on Dr Hawkins. After 3 months, my abuser still has not said anything to me after catching him in a lie. Prior, he yelled at me as if I was accusing him of something. Unfortunately, I'm done. I was calm and direct. Limited no contact.
Thank you, doctor. I have been struggling with how to deal with the narcissistic and emotional abuse by being empathetic to his emotional state while also setting boundaries, respecting myself and preserving my sanity. What you said is great advice for doing so.
Lack of object constancy. All occurance are separate and distinct
Coherency happens with a healthy person. This is impossible with an abuser. Their whole game is to be Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde all the while denying it...
I’ve been married for 24 years & I’m 65 years old, I’ve been blamed for everything that has ever happened, nothing I have to say matters because he already knows how I feel what I’m thinking what I did or didn’t do or say!!! So what can I do at this stage of the age? Please don’t misunderstand me, I am a certified mediator specializing in family dynamic & problem solving & yet I can’t resolve my own deal here, I feel like something I can’t explain….
This is so validating. Thank you. ❤
A coherent story is his enemy, and when i would try to tell him that story, i would hear i didn't forgive, i am good at bringing old stories up, that his past will always follow him because of me bringing it up, or it wasn't as bad as i told it, i exaggerated the whole thing.
I do have a question though: could there be a link with forms of autism and narcissism?
I often wonder the same thing. It is so bewildering. Councillors don’t seem to get it. - the behaviours. That makes it worse.
Thank you
Selective memory, it's what made them famous. Sorry I don’t remember, can't recall and so on and so on.
SOOOOOO TRUE.
Thank you so much.
God bless you
from JANESVILLE, WI
Lack of self view. Cant see the 30k foot view of connected emotions.
But talking about it isn't going to happen..if it is spoken it's not the person doing the damage that will ever come clean with a story ... so change will never become a possibility.
This sounds like my former boss.
Nothing was true.