Dr. Oz Asks Donald Trump to Diagnose Himself
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- Опубликовано: 9 окт 2024
- When the 70-year-old Republican nominee looks in the mirror, he sees a man half his age staring back. And somewhere in the attic, there's a portrait twice his age.
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Stephen Colbert took over as host of The Late Show on Tuesday, Sept. 8, 2015. Colbert is best known for his work as a television host, writer, actor, and producer, and best known for his charity work teaching English as a second language on Tunisian date farms. Prior to joining the CBS family -- and being officially adopted by network president Les Moonves -- Colbert helmed “The Colbert Report,” which aired nearly 1,500 episodes and required Stephen to wear nearly 1,500 different neckties. The program received two Peabody Awards, two Grammy Awards, and several unwelcome shoulder massages. It won two Emmys for Outstanding Variety Series in 2013 and 2014, both of which appear to have been lost in the move. Colbert is pronounced koʊlˈbɛər, according to Wikipedia. His understudy is William Cavanaugh, who will be hosting The Late Show approximately one third of the time. Good luck, Bill!"
The writers of this show are fucking brilliant.
:) They wouldn't be in it otherwise. lmfao
+
And Colbert delivers that writing impeccably. :) Good comment.
the band kinda screws his delivery tough, it's like a hype man, just feels off...
his jokes are lazy and obvious
This is an odd thing, but I like how Colbert, unlike a lot of other talk show hosts, actually waits for the audience to stop cheering before he carries on instead of trying to cut them off.
Right on, tovarisch, i can remember so many parodies of murrican shows about APPAUSE LAUGH signs for audience changing every 5secs and i can hardly find difference
He's an impressive performer
Help
i love colbert, i get so upset when people criticize him..
+Tatsu Maki which broke invaded country do you come from?
"35? Donald, that's not your reflection, that's your wife!"
Apply some cold water to that burn...
*ointment
Thats a compliment tho.. I dont really see it as in insult
6:05 - badum chhhhh
the drummer should have done it
not an insult at all
-next- wife
I love how Stephen always puts his imaginary objects back in his jacket
Me too :)
I do the same thing I think its yyears and years of cartoons
X. X y.
good improv habits lol
Good improv habits, shitty improv.
It used to annoy me that Jon would talk during the monologues, but I actually kinda like it now. It's like watching the show with a very enthusiastic friend.
No it's not, it's bloody annoying. Like a pal at the cinema who comments on everything happening on screen. After ten minutes of that, you wanna throttle him.
Jeff Stone It's all about the way you perceive it my dude
He's gotten better with his timing and not being too loud. Still annoys me a little but I can deal with it
I honestly don't know why some people go so hard on him. I think it's quite endearing haha
COLDBLOODED!
Holy hell, Colbert is on fire tonight!
A comedian is a good as his material. Trump is literally giving Seth, Stephen and Noah new material
It's because he's been crapping on both candidates, nonstop.
***** it isn't ghostwriting if the writers are getting credited
and u'r a fuckface lel
He's a paid shillary supporter.
"Lettuce alone, no dressing"
Which is basically rabbit food.
8 minutes of brilliance!! love this show hahaha
yes, his delivery is spectacular, but you have to remember that he has an elite staff of writers behind him.
So does literally every other show. Your point?
David Lofton
oh no, oh no...there are writers, and there are writers, the late show always had the privilege of having the most talented writers on the east coast.
that is probably why the comment stated 8 mins of brilliance!!! Love this SHOW hahaha... anyone who assumes it's a 1 man show in the first place needn't be reminded. The writers are the brilliance behind the spectacle.
bcuz u r a simpleton MSM-fed moron..the right propagnada audience for zionist media.
Colbert's dances are AWESOME!!!!
Yes... him singing that song from the Wizard of Oz while bobbing up and down (dancing?) made my day.
This video should serve as proof that Stephen doesn't target donald trump just because he is Donald trump, he targets the targetable... Which most of the time it happens to be Donald trump...
Stephen breathes in Oxygen and breathes out Comedy.
And that's a fact
Good enough at golf to play in the PGA? That sounds like something Kim Jong-un would claim.
No, Kim Jong-Un would claim he invented Golf, played once to set the record, and then started the PGA to see if anyone else could beat his record. They are still playing, so obviously they have not yet.
and now American has then own kim jong un
Didn't his dad allegedly hit 18 eagles or holes-in-one in one round or some insane sports achievement his people had to believe... or else.
It was actually a misquote. Trump did say he was good at golf, but the only thing he said about the PGA was that Obama plays so much golf as president that he should be on the PGA tour. Trump didn't say he himself should be. Watch the program.
Lol
For once Dr Oz wasn't the biggest conman on his show.
Dr. Oz is a medical expert like how Donald Trump is a successful real estate magnate.
Just because he is a medical expert, doesn't mean he is right all the time.
dammit Ava
Dr oz is a quack
+Ray Correa Hillary Clinton is a crook
lol Trump logic defense at its best. nothing constructive to add
"Lettuce alone, no dressing" sounds like a shitty pickup line xD
Donald, that not a mirror its a window...and that's Joe....He cleans our windows...say hi
:-D That joke is funny enough to be on Colbert's show! "That's a window, not a mirror" Lol
whoa whoa whoa, I think it is pretty clear Donald would never hire a window cleaner named Joe... he prefers cheaper labor and white guys named Joe are just to expensive. pretty sure he would rather pay and illegal immigrant 3$ and hour, because as much as he may dislike illegal immigrants he would (and probably has) sell his soul to make/save money.
zenerd 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Dr Oz did a show about a guy who has the head of a scarecrow, the empty chest of a tin man, the hands of a munchkin, and the hair doo of a cowardly lion, who claims to be persecuted by a wicked witch.
See what happens when you look behind the curtain?
You're welcome, cherished childhood memories!
this comment made my day😊
hahaha
If he only had a brain...
+VinnyDaQ Well, what brain he does have is that of the Wizard of Oz, a conman.
bronzenrule yep all smoke, bullshit, and fancy lights.
Looks like Dr. Google is more accurate than Doctor Oz.
A magic 8-ball is more accurate than Dr Oz.
A "magic 8-ball" is more recreational than Dr. Oz, too.
YAY KANSAS GOT ON TV FOR SOMETHING THAT ISN'T FUCKED UP!!! YAAAAAY! WE DID SOMETHING RIGHT!
anything, except Trump, is more accurate then Dr. Oz
Jeremy Kaston oh please trump couldn't hit the broad side of his own daughters face
Colbert's improv days have served him well. I LOVE his physicality.
I guess Doctors Nick Riviera and Leo Spaceman weren't available.
Neither was dr. Zoidberg.
Neither was Dr. Demento, Dr. Strange, or Dr. Octopus ! : P
Is Zoidberg actually a doctor?
Not even a backdoor doctor would want to do it
Lol. Dr Nick Riviera! :-D he's actually a more reputable Doc than the one who wrote trump's letter. "Hi everybody"
The tax returns joke had me dying on the floor I was laughing so much
We waged war with Iraq and Afghanistan with a VP who had 5 heart attacks, and a pump installed. Not sure why we're so worried right now.
lol
Because we don't like either candidate.
Cheney didn't use his heart that often. So it didn't matter for him.
Also Dick Cheney was ten years younger than Trump is now when he came into office.
And people liked Cheney?
Definitely noone that I've heard of.
If only Oz had given Trump a heart... or a brain.
haha!!! yes!
If only anyone had given Trump anything... oh, wait, he got our money.
Everyone's wigging out over pneumonia when FDR had polio.
Well they say you're young as the person you're feeling up
When I"m Trump's age i hope I'm feeling up a twenty year old . He's a champ
+chiki briki sure, bud
‘You know,’ he said [in Esquire in 1991], ‘it really doesn’t matter what they write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.’
trump does have a lot in common with thirteen-year-olds, now that you mention it…
Top level sarcasm, Stephen colbert! It's funny Coz it might happen!!
4:35 "It's funny cuz it might happen." o_O
"That's not your reflection, that's your wife."
He should've just dropped his mic at that point
Yeah..."Your wife is young and hot" is such an effective burn... ;-)
That was hilarious!
+bcubed72 How about "Your wife looks like a 35-year old version of you."?
35? THIRTY FIVE!? Look. Mr Trump. There is NO WAY a you can look at your reflection and think you look thirty five unless you have that thing Robin William's character had in the movie Jack.
oh my God all of Donald Trump's insults finally make sense. he's not insulting them that's how they actually look to him! Hillary Clinton literally looks crooked to him Marco Rubio looks like a tiny Marco Rubio and lying Ted looks like looks like he was literally laying down we've just been misinterpreting him this entire time! he has fun house mirrors eyes!
Trump went on to explain that he *feels* exactly as he did when he was 35. He wasn't claiming he thinks he looks that age. Watch the whole clip of the exchange.
The rest of the clip is actually kinda funny, the audience is clearly shocked at his claim to look 35 (because that is what is original clam was) you can even here a few people laugh then applause slowly builds... because people are sheep and if one person claps more will follow... try it sometime when you are watching something with a crowd, it's hilarious.
Damn Stephen was extra savage today 😂😂😂
"Judging by the size of his hands I would have said mini golf"..... bwahahaha!!
lmao killed it with the 35 year old joke
What is the voice in the background? The guy who randomly goes "HA!, You got 'em, uh huh, HAH HAH HAH!, ahan" lol who is that guy and why is he trying so hard?
The guy isn't funny at all
It's Jon Bapiste.
I dunno. It can be annoying, but thinking of Jon and Steven as good friends interacting with each other can add a lot of character to the show. I kind of like it.
Trump ,..the type of candidate to drive with 100 mph ..gets a speeding ticket ....and makes the police to pay for it
hmm hmm !!
If he is capable to do something like this, it is a very good reason to vote for him because that would be amazing
I'm not sure if this is a pro-trump or an anti-trump comment
Lol...yes he is that type. It's never his fault. Always someone else must pay for it.
so funny!
Dr. Oz, Alex Jones... I see a con game with Trump.
Is this show named "Roasting Donald Trump"? Because they're nailing it.
THE BURNS KEEP COMING
+freako
No actually.
"Lettuce alone, no dressing."
Now officially the best joke in 2016.
I diagnosed myself once, and was going to sue myself for a misdiagnoses. But I died before I could sue me.
"it's funny... because it might happen".
I laughed, hiccupped and barfed a little bit all at once. #appropriateresponse
This man is a treasure. X3
I would watch Stephen Colbert do a one man show of the Wizard of Oz. I would be fascinated and enthralled by that performance.
Colbert you are the man...
"Naah he's ok... Could be a little taller, also..... WHY WONT HE LET ME SLEEP" hilarious.
I remember this episode. It's weird that I am nostalgic for The Time Before The Election.
As always, the material's mostly great and the delivery is perfect! I love Stephen Colbert but I don't watch TV much so I just see RUclips highlights occasionally.
damn, stephen is on fire!
lmao at the 'school bus' bit, that's darker than I expect from Colbert.
Wait, Dr. Oz still has a show??
He never had a show. It was an infomercial.
Scott Humphreys ....
trump talks like a little toddler
That is because Trump is a man-child.
HE DOESSS! Watch The Daily Show's Trevor Noah do a piece on that! Its on his RUclips! Its extremely funny!
Trump is a man baby that never grew up.
So true. All Trump can think about is the little pieces of green paper that can buy him more boobs, butts, steaks, and the uneducated people he turns into slaves.
8 minutes of noble savagery
I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING!! MISTER COLBERT, YOU OUTDID YOURSELF!!
Lets be honest... If a meteor were to fall on the next place to hold a debate between the two major candidates, even if you liked one of them, we'd all feel at least a bit of relief.
Cheers!
azureATC
Fine you piece of.... Wouldn't it be lovely if the venue the candidates were debating in AT THE TIME were to be struck and completely destroyed, killing everyone inside, by a large cosmic space rock colliding with earth?
Kinda.. but what about all those people? Wouldn't they die too? Could we somehow introduce a new segment into the debate that involved blindfolding the candidates and getting them to stand really still for 10-20 minutes? Let's tell them it is a test of mental acuity, resilience and overall physical well-being. Then, unbeknownst to the candidates, the audience and all members would be evacuated and the meteor would strike..
27kdon
I'm not saying it would be something we plan. It's not like we have a ready supply of asteroids and meteors ready to drop on the planet. Yes it would be unfortunate that the civilians died, but I think plenty of people would still feel just a little bit of relief.
"A bit of relief"? I would party for the next whole month. And I'm not even american.
Just crown him the King of Late night!!! Colbert has been hitting it out of the park, lately!
And while you are at it, crown Samantha Bee as the Queen of late night!
Do you really need that "hype-guy" to waaaaaaauuuuuuw and laugh all the time? Isn't that what the audiences are there for?
Well, he's actually an amazingly talented musician, not a hype guy. That's why he's in the band section. He is pretty annoying sometimes, I will give you that!
Donald, you need to hurry and get this country back in shape. We as Americans are truly heartless, dishonest, thiefs, and unfortunately our society will not be here anymore if our moral compass doesn't come back ASAP.
Donald, you need to hurry and get this country back in shape. We as Americans are truly heartless, dishonest, thiefs, and unfortunately our society will not be here anymore if our moral compass doesn't come back ASAP.
It reminds us that Steven is not racist
you people are fucked in your heads.
thats a talented musician and head of the band. why must you allude to his race?
prejudice and racism going strong in 2016 huh?
35 years of jail he should do, scambag.
Yoda?
"Scumbag he is!" "Vote Nader, I still do."
I'd see the problems with the wall. Give my tax returns for all. IF I ONLY HAD A BRAIN!
35. Jesus how can anyone not realize the man is INSANE?
The ol' "he was joking/sarcastic" dodge is wearing mighty thin. He clearly believes the delusional crap he spews. That he gets away with it is a measure of how bad things have become.
He's the stereotypical rich ugly american db. How blue collar Americans can look to him and think that he will represent their interests is baffling.
Everything Trump said is true. But I understand your reaction, kids get scared when someone tries to break their bubble, then after it they start calling mommy Clinton to protect them against the big bully.
Carlos Roberto
Like WHAT? What has he said that can be backed up with actual facts? What? That he'd do his daughter if he wasn't related? That he watched secret videos of money shipments to Iran? That the NFL wrote him about the debates? That 95% of blacks will vote for him? Pleas, name of few of the scary truths this lunatic has told. I can name plenty of lies:www.dailywire.com/news/4834/trumps-101-lies-hank-berrien#
To all you singles out there, When Trump was 23, Melania wasn't even born yet.
Great wizard of Oz impression. Loved it! so funny
Whoever writes the youtube descriptions is brilliant.
*Why do they keep the band's mics on when the band is not playing?*
*So annoying!*
*Why do they keep the band's mics on when the band is playing? So fucking annoying!*
Conhan D. *I know, right?*
I'm always screaming at the t.v. for them to cut John Bautiste's mic.
***** huh?
JoeDurobot
This guy is lost I think...
Since he released his medical record on Dr.Oz he should release his tax returns on Shark Tank.
Lettuce alone, no dressing?
That's GOLD!
hahahahahahhaha!
Someone turns the mike of Jon's off !!
That wife roast is prolly the best one i've heard ever 😂😂😂
Trump:"[When I look in the mirror] I see a person who's 35 years old"
Delusion, convince yourself
I was lol multiple times during this standup. I often laugh at others, but this one had so many hilarious things in a row lol
Trump reminds me of a capitalist version of Kim Jong Un.
really? I always thought of it like this, Kim Jong Un and Putin had a love child lets call it Beelz and this person met Abub who was a love child of Stalin and Hitler, when Beelz and Abub met, they had a child and named it Donald Trump.
tiny99990 I like your style.
Wow. I would call that needlessly over complicated, but you're probably right.
Maybe they ARE the same person! Anyone ever see them together in the same room?
Naomi Nekomimi, Trump's proven you correct. 😉
That little Yardbird sweet opening after speaking about the Early Bird special was wonderful
So much better than Fallon's joke of an interview.
Colbert's chill is lowering by the day lmao
Have a great day everyone😊 remember to look after eachother eachother regardless of their political views😊
+Tatsu Maki Because it's the morally right thing to do, Matrix Tornado.
+Badass Atheist Then you become exactly what you say you are, and also exactly what you hate them for being
don't get me wrong, I hate trump😂 but we shouldn't demonise him or his supporters just because they disagree with me. Freedom means people have the right to have their own opinion, that right doesn't suddenly vanish because they disagree with you.
"The only thing we know less about than what is in fast food is what is in your tax returns."
Dammit, I was expecting a joke about Hillary Clinton's emails.
Best opening yet
Batiste piano interjections were on point this segment!
Damn Jon Batiste... Why so awkward?
how can u guys seriously consider electing trump ?????!!!!!!🤔😣😓
some times you just want to watch it burn. I don't but I understand wanting to see a hopeless situation end. the hole assisted suicide thing. they just want it all to end.
...because it would be a necessary catharsis for the Democratic party, to lose to such a man. Because it possibly might break up the two-party hegemony. Because the Executive branch (Presidency) is too powerful, and having Trump serve might spur us to reel in the power of the Presidency.
...basically, because the guy is such an effective "wrecking ball," and right now, we need to knock down a rotting structure so we can put something else in its place.
trust me...SERIOUS people AREN'T considering this gibbon.
Don could look at some old video to see himself at 35. Back then he had gerbils for eyebrows.
LMAO
Saw it that night. Ah, the Honeymoon Salad!
35 years? More like 3.5 years . gaa gaa goo goo
Know I know why FDR decided to have all pictures of him from the waist up
I think we all do at this point
COLBERT IS FINDING HIS NEW GROOVE...BURNS BURNS EVERYWHERE
Cut the piano guys mic!! It's seriously distracting!
The jokes in this episode slayed me!!! One of his best yet, good job Colbert Team!
Look up the Iroquois League. They are where we got the idea for our federal democracy, union of states, and the idea of a president. Fun fact: The Tadodahoe (President) was a position originally invented to appease an unreasonable warmonger by making him think that he was actually special.
I'm not making this up.
Excellent! Thx for sharing. I did not know that.
How fucking credulous are you? Do you know nothing of Greece or Rome?
Terran Loyalist Have you actually looked up anything on the Iroquois and their influence on our early government? We don't have a Caesar, or anything like that. We do have a Senate, and named it after the Roman Senate, but the Iroquois invented the Bicameral Legislature that we use; The House of Representatives something neither the Romans nor the Greeks ever had. And neither of them had a Federation or Union of disparate States... that's pure Iroquois.
Oh, and if you actually do look this up (because you should, it's fascinating stuff), use the word "Haudenosaunee". That was their name for themselves, and people who use the name of the people they're talking about tend to be more trustworthy to the source.
I will look this up. Thanks so much for sharing.
Stephen you get an F- for mocking Hillary's dizzy spell . Absolutely no excuse for that .
Stephen destroyed Trump in this bit.
I love the bit about small tiny hands, then immediately segue into a bit about junk lol. So funny.
I wish he had a mic he could have dropped after the age joke.
"That's not your reflection, that's your wife." Nice.
Good physical condition vs Good mental condition.
Elections 2016
hilarious....I burst out in laughter at your comment!😂
Poor Stephen. He has to dance around like an idiot every night for his puppet master.
Your foil hat is peeling of
Alan Rochin
Look it's one of Stephen's clueless fans.
As if Clinton has any influence over a satirical news show. Nobody would change their vote no matter what Stephen said.
the joke of hillary fainting was just bad taste. i don't think hillary is a good person but it's not right to laugh at her while suffering.
Life is a comedy, not a tragedy.
LostChildOfTime world war 2 was hilarious!
Eric Stilthool So was slavery.
Pff.. because comparing someone fainting with an actual tragedy that cost people their lives is so much more reasonable.
hahahaha "that is not you trump that is your wife" hahaha i died ... awesome show
5:59😂😂😂😂😂 👏👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌
Colbert is so goddamn comfortable on stage. the subtle differences from his old "character" are great.
Donald Trump is definitely a narcissistic oompaloompa overlord.
Goddamn man, Pure gold. Best late night show right now by a LONG SHOT. Absolutely not biased, and in some sense, it feels no holds barred, just brilliant.
I never said Hillary was a better option. But Trump does not share my views on minorities, the lower class, military, or social issues. I feel like he would do wonderful wonderful things for the upper class. However the lower class and lower middle class will suffer. He's racially insensitive and misogynistic. He's tone deaf. He has sketchy ties with Russia, the KKK, recently the police union, etc. I could continue this for a while. Have I made my point?
very well put
So you think the upper class woman who has ties to Wall Street, a multi-billion foundation that doesn't pay taxes, contacts in Saudia Arabia, and who charges a minimum fee for even the smallest speech, who is also part of the establishment.. Is good for minorities, the lower class, military or social issues?
You could literally not have a more fucking detached president than Clinton.
The very first sentence of my comment was that Hillary is not a better option. Not sure why people are commenting trying to "tell" me about Clinton as if I didn't know these things...read full sentences people. Don't just skim
Joe Vazquez oh you mean the grand wizard that denounced his old affiliation and constantly apologized for his actions? Funny you would say that when fucking David Duke came out to support Trump.
Did someone hit him with an Obliviate Spell? 35, Donald Trump, the Gilderoy Lockhart of Muggles...
With Bernie, White House dinner would have been 4:20.
"Donald thats not your reflection, thats your wife" IM DEAD AHAHHAHA