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My sister is an INFP and growing up she always had so many guys interested in her, especially in high school and college. People would call her out on flirting when she didn't mean to. However, when she actually was interested in someone, her flirting skills were zero. Now she's in a happy relationship with an INTP so it doesn't come up as much!
The tragedy of being INFP. We just being nice & comfortable around people often gets mistaken for attempts at flirting & whatnot. Hell, the overwhelming majority of us DON'T even have a flirt switch & most probably NEVER developed one!
I’m curious as to how they got together because speaking as an INTP myself, the IN_P’s in general aren’t that great in flirting or confessing their love
Similar INFP. I use to flirt outrageously to put others at ease, yet I was horrified if anyone mistook it for REAL FLIRTING?!. I'm much more of a single-for-life type.
INFP here, not a fan of flirting with strangers and really awkward when interacting with my crush, but man, when I am comfortable with someone... It's a whole different story. I flirt with my best friends all the time, it is almost a love language to me - as is constantly teasing them. Last year it even got to the point where I almost ended up in a relationship with one of them because of all the flirting and the deep connection we had in the first place. So, I think INFP's are great at flirting, as it is, in a way, just playing with words and being quick-witted. But only with people we feel comfortable showing our true selves to, so that kind of leaves all the people we actually should be flirting with😂😂
See, that later part, ain't actually flirting. It's just us being in our element, being very comfortable & just outright being nice. We do that with just about everyone we're comfortable around, crush or otherwise. It's just a thing we do that others MISTAKE for attempts at flirting. To be a good flirt, hell, to actually flirt, it has to be something intentional & targeted, & THAT is where we often end up crashing & burning.
Totally agree. It's a love language with my friends! I'm so flustered if I want it to be intentional, i can't get through with it just stand their all red fucking my head like a stupid teenager! 💀
The ESFPs or ESTPs would definitely get my vote for "Most Flirtatious", but I've known a few ISFPs or ISTPs who can be VERY coy when it comes to flirting!
As someone who is friends with an ESFP and ESTP, I fully agree. I'm pretty sure this ESTP has flirted with me before which leaves me confused as heck but oh well
Yep. Totally agree. I am an INFJ and I will follow your trail blaze with that one. Romance is seriously a dying trend and now we are left to be told to take self care into consideration more. That to me is selfish. This is what has caused women to be more entitled and for men to become more submissive over the decades and it is causing a huge problem on a mans masculinity. They are predominantly letting us women have empowerment. It is no wonder that the world is crumbling apart. We need harmonious balance. Let us stop competing in the Gender boxing ring , and instead start to love and respect each other.
I'd say it's kinda funny as an ENFP to think about flirting. Like when I've actively tried it, I've been very very awkward, and ultimately failed, but when I'm just messing around or being kind, it gets connected with flirting. So In a way you're probably right, but it's also one of those things where it isn't actual flirting cause *I'm not actually trying it just looks like it*. I feel like that old spice commercial with just "I'm on a horse" but it's mostly cause I'm having fun... but I guess people are very positive to that 🤣 it can get awkward...
I agree! being friendly, laughing, and making someone else feel good about themselves by giving them time & attention seems to be easy… but if I’m actually attracted to someone and try to flirt it comes out super awkward and it’s so embarrassing 😂
absolutely! the way to tell if i have a crush on you is that i *stop* flirting with you, because i suddenly start actively thinking about it and it makes me incredibly flustered and awkward haha
What I (as one INTJ) can say is that the limited amount of "flirting" that I engage in entails a series of probing, interrogative questions. All of which I ask in order to understand the person's deeper motivations, principles and long-term ambitions. I wouldn't mind being asked or answering these questions myself, but it seems like they make many people either uncomfortable, bored or both (which I'm guessing is quite antithetical to the typical goal of flirting). Especially when it turns out that most people my age don't seem to think about such things a lot, or really at all.
Provide examples, cause this sounds creepy. (Also intj) Fun fact. I once attempted to do small talk with my standard three safe subjects, music, movie & series, hobbies. After that the guy (almost total stranger) i was talking with ~a total extrovert~ dm me to go out. Ofc i declined. The poor soul didn't believe when i said i truly don't consume alcohol any more.
I flirt like this if I find someone worthy of such a response from me, but I tend to do exactly these things as well. I like to make attempts to show that they have a high priority with me at that current time and I'd like to make them happy by doing things that they enjoy or find interest in. It helps me to understand them on a deeper level, and to see what our compatabilitiy levels may be like if I decide to pursue if given the green light in return. Though, it's incredibly rare for me to actually take an interest in anyone in that manner. (INTJ-A female :D ). At the same time, I also seem to scare people with how straight forward I am about any feelings I may have about them -_-
@@fayem4091 I have difficulties recalling adequately illustrative instances at this moment, but one of my standard questions is "Do you have any words that you live by?". When they do, I ask them follow-up questions for them to elaborate on their idea(s) in different ways, so that I can get an insight into the core of their philosophy, and judge that accordingly. If their answer is "No", I encourage them to think about it. This doesn't need to be a short, catchy phrase or anything, but just some form of definable foundation that guides them throughout existence and it's plentiful challenges. Essentially, I ask them what they do and why. I don't really "let them go" in that respect, which might be a significant cause of discomfort. I also notice and point out if they do not answer one or several of the questions. If this becomes a pattern, I question their avoidance (unless it's information that, if uncautiously shared, would potentially pose a physical threat). But I figure that if I can ultimately get them to think more seriously and live more purposefully, then my objective of the interaction is, more or less, completed. With that said, the right person will not be opposed to my true goals and motives, so I imagine that the ideal scenario would be when the person is willing to answer important questions and does so with mutual intrigue. I realize that this isn't really what most people are looking for when flirting, but if flirting requires me to disregard the deeper meaning and long-term implications of the interaction (to make it playful, one might say) then I suppose flirting simply isn't for me. Because such an act would not be in accordance with my greater vision.
As an ENFP, I absolutely agree ! Most of the time, people don’t understand that we don’t necessarily want something as a result of the conversation. Sometimes I am flirtatious just because it’s fun and it’s a great way to put yourself in a social mood (even in moments I’m in a not talkative moment). So yeah, flirt is more like a game with two players. I mean it’s cool if you end up in a relationship, but it’s cool as well to flirt for the pleasure to flirt and talk.
Error 301: Does not compute. Further input is required. You guys are the total opposite of us. I will never get you. Especially all the extroverts. Omg j get overwhelmed from all the colours in the supermarket, let alone all the facts i have to learn and sort about a stranger, let alone i like, let alone i might (like my 16yo niece would say) like-like.... You guys are too much. ~intj
@@fayem4091 I'm ISFP, highly extroverted when I'm alone with my mind yet the naturally introverted in social settings. I do get the ENFPs' view of personal pleasure. I'm just a kid and so I resonate with the concept. But yeah, what good in return are you have by giving in to your fantastic and youthful desires? Neither their parents, nor their future selves won't benefit to it.
(INFP here) My experience is that I haven’t actually tried flirting. I just Don’t. Know. How. To properly flirt. Most of the time, I’ll be crushing on someone and depending on my relationship with them and who they are to me already, that may or may not be apparent. I must mention that when I like someone, banter and more teasing is done is done my part cause I’m scared to be *too* nice that it makes things awkward🥲 whenever I’m nice, I tend to come off too strong lol. Yea… awkward. That’s the perfect word for my love relations. As for the video like I said, the closest thing I get to flirting is banter. And I’ll imagine entire scenarios with a crush without ever making a move.😂
As an ISFP, I definitely resonate with the full on/off notion. Mood and interest level play a huge factor in how I’ll interact. Thought it was an individual quirk, but I'm starting to think it's common among ISFPs
Yes. But for me I think the biggest factor is whether I like the person I’m interacting with or not (which I obviously usually know instantly upon meeting someone lol) and whether or not I feel like the person I’m interacting with likes me. If I don’t like someone, I’m instantly off. If I think they don’t like me, then why bother? Off again. But if I do like someone, the flirt is automatically turned way up lol totally subconscious I have no idea how it happens
This is such a comfort channel for me. I'm really struggling with life at the moment, but watching these videos just makes life so much better. Thank you ❤️🥐
INFP here - the last time I was head-over-heels for someone I actually used to dread seeing him because I was so awkward around him. Openly flirting was out of the question! I am good with words, on paper only. Someone else has mentioned that they sometimes give people the idea they're attracted to them without meaning to. This has been a huge nuisance to me too. Almost always much older guys, incidentally. Also, there's nothing more mortifying (and irritating) than being rejected mid-innocent conversation by someone you genuinely have no interest in!!
Seems to me INTPs and flirting is a potent but very chaotic combination. The flirting techniques of choice might be so outre that few people realize they are attempts at flirting, and at the same time there's a good potential of just enthusiastic good-spirited wittiness which can come off as flirtatious without the INTP even realizing it... And we are notoriously bad at picking up the flirting of others. So "sometimes" sounds right, but a good deal of it misses its target or happens despite ourselves...
There was no proof (Ti) of anyone flirting with me, and I could think of any number (Ne) of other meaning their words might have had between the lines. Therefore I conclude that humans can't read each others thoughts in any circumstance and anyone claiming to is lying to themselves. So if anyone flirts with me I stay ignorant of the fact.
Accurate ISTP assessment, as usual. To add to your description, I’d say we can be pretty sly - but in an obvious way. Our intentions? Clear as day. The humor and comments we use to achieve said intentions? You might have to think for a second to realize the clever execution. We definitively have a characteristic flirting style, imo at least. ~ISTP
INFP here, & I've actually been told in the face by a girl, that i was really awful at flirting. Much as i'd like to prove you wrong, i'd say that even the best among us in the game could only kinda get the basics right & little else.
As an INFP I have to say I'm terrible with flirting, not just with the attempting to (I don't think I ever have really), but also when someone tries to flirt with me, even if I like them I'll just start giggling uncontrollably because I don't know how to respond and then cover my face. it's a good job I don't mind my own company.
I'm an ENFP and I totally agree with you about my type. I have to add that I was the one who had to make the more obvious moves when I met my INTP guy. But his flirtatious talk included the mating habits of Komodo Dragons. This kind of dragon is real, not fantasy. We both have a very playful side and have weathered almost 3 decades together, even though we don't always agree.
I'm an INTJ and my girlfriend is an ISFP. When we first met, we hit it off _very_ well, which neither of us usually experience with other people, since we can both be reserved and uninterested in what others do or want. She's one of a handful of people I have chosen to flirt with, and the few times prior to that were a disaster because I was not a fully-realized person. She had initially told me no, actually, because we were online friends and she wasn't willing to do long-distance, which was fine, we valued our friendship and wanted that to remain intact. But it flipped around when I moved to her state (she was not the reason, it was to remove toxicity in my life) and she became immediately open to dating. I think you described us both pretty damn well with her ISFP tendency to be either on or off, and how an INTJ can do things expertly but chooses not to. lol I don't know how you do it, but you're definitely one of the few channels I think has personality type down in both generalization and nuance.
The interaction with your girlfreind sounds pretty similar to mine with my ISFP boyfriend! The first time we met we started chatting very easily, although we are both reserved. And then I am the one who initiated the next interactions leading to dating (I don't know if we can call this flirting though, just finding excuses to chat online lol), while in the past I was the one being flirted on by extroverts... Actually I think I don't like when men try to flirt with me. It makes me feel like a helpless prey, I don't know how to respond to it so the interaction ends up being unbalanced. It only works if the interaction flips to being an interesting conversation (yeah with ENFPs and ENTPs, I admit)!
ENTP here.. I guess I am usually a good flirt because I enjoy having playful, fun conversations and am open to any topic.. But if I'm intentionally trying to flirt with someone I'm attracted to, sometimes I'm great at it and at others, quite awkward
Yeah I never flirted with my SO cause be made me nervous but i flirt often with random ppl I don't even feel attracted to lmao I think it's just to make them better about themselves idkk
You have awaken an embarrasing memory in me, Nathan. I NEVER flirt, but one day, I decided (for some reason) to write a love poem to a girl I liked. The next day, I gave it to her before entering classes, and her twin sister was with her. I GAVE IT TO HER IN PERSON how? -INFP in denial.
@Linda Torres She took it, at least. I remember when I gave it to her she looked at her sister and the whole situation was a little bit weird. I sometimes wonder if she kept it or not. She had a boyfriend then (if I'm not mistaken), so the result was obvious. Maybe our relationship did change a bit, but nothing remarkable. I'm awkward anyway 🤣 Pd: At least you didn't reject him in a very direct way. Could be worse.
I’m an eccentric and playful INFP with adhd, and people have always thought that I am constantly flirting!! Even when I was in kindergarten. It’s horrible. I hate the accusation and misunderstanding. I don’t even know how to flirt, I’m 24 F and I never had the chance to learn that because I’ve experienced that every single human male on this earth is wired to experience curiosity, respect, friendliness, and presence, all out of my personal principal and nature, as sexual interest. I also can’t recognize when a man is flirting with me unless if it’s super sexually foreword and direct. Side note- I love the thumbnail!
I'm an INTP. I don't know if that has anything to do with what I'm going to say about this, but here I go. I hate the idea of flirting. I think direct communication of intent is the most meaningful (which is a subjective notion) because it takes guts to be clear about how you're feeling. Guts that I rarely demonstrate. I have more respect for people who can be direct about that than people who are socially smooth. I also learned pretty recently that some people flirt with their friends, and when I learned this, I remember thinking in that moment: "Are you serious??? I hate people!!" Anyway cool video! Interesting stuff as always. I hope anyone who is reading this has a good day or whatever you call "now" in relation to the sun's placement in the sky or in the depths of hell.
Loved this video. As an INFJ female, my ESTP work colleague use to slam me constantly for flirting, when all I was doing was being a friendly social chameleon. I can spot if someone is being flirty with me in a heartbeat, and I for the best part want to run for the hills. My Se inferior cannot cope with the unwanted attention. Unless I like them of course. Like you say, I take my sweet analytical time to mentally screen them to come to a " is this worth going for?" verdict.
Haha I can relate to this so much. Especially the mentally screening them part. Sometimes I feel like I’m being too fussy when I do this, but I think it’s just how we work as INFJ’s? 🤷♀️
ISFJ here, and you nailed it. I struggle with flirting because I'm afraid I'm flattering myself if I read something as flirting that isn't intended that way, and I never want to come across as feeling more than I do, so I am very reserved. It makes attempts to date super difficult, but when a relationship does happen, I feel much safer because we've been direct and up-front with each other rather than teasing and dancing all around each other and causing possible confusion and hurt feelings.
Excellent-concise and informative as usual! As an ENFJ, I can sometimes come across as flirting when I’m actually just engaged in conversation and trying to figure out who this other person is. Likely is the correct spot for ENFJ, I believe. We are quick to turn it off if flirting wasn’t our intention.
ISFP here. Yes, we are 'full on, full off' in most things if I am in any way typical. Things and people that interest us get our attention, things that don't, don't.
When I was younger I used my skill at writing to flirt with girls online. Like showing off my literary muscles or something. :p But when it comes to real-life flirting, I think INFP rather seek a deep connection with the other person, by engaging, talking, listening, sharing… rather than flirting. At least, that's my experience as an INFP. :)
Hi! An ISFP here. I noticed that when I'm fully interested with a person (be it an artist I idolize or an individual within a close proximity), I tend to go quite crazy. Not too much, because I also leave something for myself. I think in flirting, we kinda know how to balance whether to go or no go. It's like we try to assess: "Will this (flirty) actions benefit me? Or hurt me?" "Does this person ever is genuine with his intentions?" "Can I make their lives better with me in the picture?" Maybe too self-centered in a sense. For me, I can never ask myself if I'm good enough. I'm good and want good for you, so I deserve good treatment. And if that person somehow fell short on this, better luck next life.
INFP here! I must say I consider myself quite the flirt. If this were just about me, I’d put myself in the Likely category. Of course it’s not just about me, and there is range in every type :D but I do think I’m on the more wellspoke/better at communicating side of the INFP spectrum. I’m still painfully introverted and prefer to spend time alone, with my loved ones or pets, BUT when I am forced to be around people - at work, out at a bar etc, I find myself rather easily maintaining a bubbly and welcoming persona and people often seem to feel comfortable approaching and speaking to me. And when it comes to someone I feel drawn to, I must say I enjoy a bit of a flirt. Perhaps this is because I’ve been able to gain a sort of confidence over the years, and I have been in 2 longer term relationships so it’s not so foreign to me anymore? But all I know is that I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy the attention… i think it’s quite an INFP thing to enjoy feeling special/seen by people. Maybe my flirting is just that?
Same. My twin sister is an infp and she often tells me about her flirting experiences. I am an intj, and the exact opposite. I envy her for that though 😆
Your experience basically summarizes my INFP fiance. He has a very bubbly and welcoming persona when in social situations, but left to his own devices, he would be at home with just me, watching RUclips videos.
What's your gender? I'm just curious because im starting to form the hypothesis that male infps might tend do be more communicative on average than female infps
I'm an INTJ and I if I like someone I would probably just say it outright (after a month or so of observing them of course). If they're scared off, good, it probably wasn't meant to be. If they're somehow still around there's a chance it could work out in the long run.
I'm an INFJ and apparently just being myself is flirtatious enough that I've been mistaken for an ENFP on occasion lol no, but seriously, a lot of people seem to think they're my soulmate when I'm not trying to flirt at all. on the rare occasion I do flirt on purpose, there's no mistaking it in the form of sheepish admiration or exaggeratedly contrived smooth moves 💥😏😂
15:51 I think Personality Hacker answers the question about INTJ being unwilling to do many things they _could_ do very well. Fi, nicknamed _authenticity_ in 3rd slot, AKA child. In PH's car model you have the driver (dominant function), a co-pilot (strong, utility function), a child (complementary to the co-pilot; underdeveloped, very sensitive, and highly treasured), and a baby (complementary to the driver, cries and sh!ts itself making an already bad situation even worse). On top of that, introverted decider (Fi/Ti) is tied to one's identity, and Ni/Se has no respect for rules and external authorities - Ni is fiercely independent, Se is outright rebellious. So, IxTJs want to stay true to themselves, and I'd expect NJs to show it much more than SJs would. Circling back to the original topic of flirting: INTJ who's core identity is based on romantic relationships would probably be quite flirtatious. I wonder if those even exist though. Any other INTJ will likely see flirting as a waste of time and energy, and in some situations maybe even identity violation (play-pretend). There are other, more authentic ways to satisfy (modest) social needs, and when things become really hard, it's more _efficient_ (Te co-pilot / utility) to get your hands dirty or pay for a professional service.
I am with you for what you said. I can sense a bit of "social engineering" for flirting, but I refuse to do it because they are highly against my Fi values. There was one case where I "joked around" with her level of humor matching with mine, but it was extremely exhausting. My version of flirting is being Te professional at first, by yes, asking questions, then I more and more throw in Fi and it is pretty much Fi once very comfortable, depending on the person of course.
As an INTP, on the flip side, I am well aware of when I'm trying to flirt but have no idea when I'm being flirted with. My first two dates I had ever been on, I didn't even know were dates until days afterwards when said person was upset that I didn't call them back for another date (this was mid-90s...pre texting, even e-mail was something of a novelty).
Yup, the first major hurdle is for me to be remotely aware of someone is flirting with me the second is me convincing myself that the person is most likely not flirting with me.
In my experience with infps (ik a ton of infps) they tend to under-react to shocking or pleasing things they might be ashamed of, or simply don't want others to know they like.
I am an INFP and this described me exactly. So much so that when you mentioned writing dirty fanfic for someone as a means of flirting, I burst out laughing because of how eerily accurate that is for me personally.
INTJ... I like to ask random questions & figure the other person out, piece by piece. *Layer by layer* ... not the most conventional form of "flirting" but that's my love language ●__●
"ENTPs are often masterful at creating... sparks. Sometimes one that can lead to attraction, other times to thermonuclear explosions." Such a force 💥 Also that thumbnail pic 😳😳💀
I can say for myself (I'm an INTJ) that I usually flirt with the intend of joking around. Because when I notice that the person is flirting in a "true flirty way" I tend to get bored or ashamed for some reason and just want to get out of this interaction as quick as possible.
Friendly flirting is a default position for the EXFP types. I just really enjoy fun and silly conversations with people, and if it makes them feel good, that’s even better
The description of being on/off as an ISFP is right on, though sometimes the ESFJ problem of people latching on by misinterpreting my politeness with “flirting” is also a thing, which I find very annoying at times. I’m either not flirting, or I am /definitely/ flirting. There’s very little room for doubt between the two. Nicknames, poems, really laying it on, etc. It’s hard to miss lol.
INFP, and what you said was pretty much spot on... For teenage me. Post college, I started being able to handle the back and forth, but never really initiated it. With my ENTP partner, when we started dating, it was very much a "boke and tsukkomi" relationship (or in British comedy terms, the wise guy and the straight man). Over the years, the roles now switch between us, because we both have that strong Ne and can be absurdist with each other. In public though, I'm still unintentionally seen as the more serious one.
As a female infj, I think you are 100% right about what you said. At first some people might think I'm a little shy or reserved but after getting to know me better I can become really flirty, especially after I have analyzed what each person would like to hear or what would make them laugh or even blush. My really close friend is an esfp and she is flirty 24/7 and when I'm with her I kind of catch up on her flirtiness and become like that too. Also, combined with sometimes really dark humor that people don't expect from me at all, they can be really surprised once I open up to them, haha
I’m an ISFP. I can be extremely flirty, but only if im seriously interessted. So you are right. I would never flirt just for flirting. So it’s actually rare. I can be charming if I want something, but it needs an extra focus.
I'm an INFP personality and in my younger years I flirted a lot, regardless of whether I was dating others or in a relationship (harmless fun). Agree others initiated the flirt, but I enjoyed the banter. I think I still flirt a bit, even after over 20 years of marriage. Oh, and the insight that we tend to be reserved even when acting flamboyantly and / or showing eccentricity is spot on. I've been described as friendly yet aloof.
An ISFP. Sometimes I flirt without realizing it, and people misunderstand, but most of the time, it is just fun teasing people and they misunderstand (or maybe I am not so clear). I also saw a few ISFPs flirting in a not so clear ways, leaving my friends to question their words and actions (and ISFPs probably didn't give a second thought about it)
Yeah, I like to tease people who reciprocate well (tease back or get flustered). It is fun. But most of the time, it doesn't matter who the person is and if I like them romantically or not. I just enjoy the interaction. I may flirt one time and be closed-off the next time we meet, depending on my mood.
This is fascinating. As an INTJ, I will differ. You need to be more specific. With most people I dont know, I question them. I usually dont flirt with strangers, I drill them, question, give a death stare. But with my soulmate/other half, I am a passionate, lascivious, hot blooded seductive flirt.... very sensual.
This is very accurate. As an INTJ happily married to an INFJ, we flirt with each other practically all the time. Ask either of us to flirt with someone we don't want, and you're unlike to get your ask, however.
Are you trying to flush out the ISFP’s watching your channel? 🤣 Great video, as always! As an ISFP myself I think you where spot on with the full on / full off thing. Most of the time it depends on my mood, the situation or the person. For instance, if I am tired, I don’t give a crap about anything and I just want to be left alone. When it comes to flirting it really depends on whether I am comfortable with the person I am with, and if I sense if he’s interested in me or not. In that case I can even be teasing and flirting without really being aware of it myself.
I’ve noticed (as an INFP) that if I SEEM to be flirting then I’m really just being nice. If I intend to flirt, then it gets all awkward and weird and then I want to melt into the background. I’ve also noticed that if others flirt with me, I tend to go into shy mode way too easily, regardless of whether I like the other person or not. ☺️
Yeah I honestly don't flirt unless I'm pretty damn sure I want something with the person. When such is the case, I like to be playful and seductive, which somehow I'm not bad at, despite rarely ever doing it.
ENFP talking to just anyone: Lay that friendly (misinterpreted as flirty) on thick. Pull out all those flirtatious, witty banter. Smile, body language, the works. E ENFP actually flirting: So, do you like Potatoes? If you were a Potato, what kind of Potato would you be? If you think an ENFP is flirting with you, they probably are not. If you think they are the most awkward thing you have ever laid eyes on, they are probably flirting.
INFP here, whenever I try to be close with someone, I feel it often goes over their heads XD Maybe it doesn't tho and they're just keeping it to themselves to not hurt my feelings- How can I say for sure when I never confessed to them to begin with? 😅
I, INFP here, can really only speak for myself of course, but I'm curious if any other INFPs might relate to this. I'm kind of a natural flirt, but I probably think of flirting a little differently. I think of flirting as the energy that bubbles up either between people or within an individual that is similar to the energy of being in "flow state" but in the very extroverted sense. It's a happy enthusiasm while being very at ease in your interactions and speech and inspiring that ease and enthusiasm in others. I flirt with all kinds of people and it's very rarely because I'm thinking of that person in a romantic or sexual way. I feel good about myself when I can create a space that allows for others to feel comfortable, or better yet, feel confident. It serves my own need for harmony. Granted, it sometimes ends up being misconstrued by somebody and it's never fun to have to correct that perception. If I’m flirting because I'm romantically or sexually interested, there's really no way of mistaking it for something else, it means I'm actively pursuing you. I'll typically wait til the other person makes the first move or gives me some sort of "tell" and then I pounce. More touching and smiling and laughing, holding eye contact just a little bit longer, and probably some dirty jokes peppered in here or there with a more tasteful or highbrow slant, lol. Any INFPs or people familiar with INFPs- thoughts?
Also an INFP and I would say that I'm terrible at flirting. But, I can relate to this "social flow" state. I can't imagine it happening if I had a crush on someone and not knowing whether it's mutual or not yet though.
What's intersting is that I'm an intj, but I have been told by people multiple times that I can come across as naturally flirtatious. I have been mistyped by people as a infp, enfp or entp before (I'm actually for real an intj though no doubt). But when I am actually flirting often times people don't realise it, either because I get incredibly sarcastic or harsher to people I actually like. Also I have a very distinct type of flirting I enjoy, so yes I am very good at pretending to flirt but i personally wouldn't consider it actual flirting
All or nothing at heart is 100 true. The level of openness to giving mid varies though. When I feel super connected to my true self, I like exploring, performing, embracing different parts of my persona. Because I’m at ease with who I actually am, I can have fun doing things, let’s say flirting just for the sake of it. It’s only when I lack a sense of self, I get super picky on things/people I do. So probably the only time people think me as a full-on/full-off type of person is when I’m unbalanced, or around my dearest&closest one whom I can feel safe & guaranteed will love every aspects of me. Others might see me as like stereotypical Ne dom. (Also I’m an ADHDer)
I've never flirted in my life. Wouldn't know how to and don't think I'd ever try, mostly cuz I don't want to. Your analysis of INFPs was very accurate, for me at least.
Ye so true about intjs. When I want to I could fake flirt so well and sometimes I do just as sort of social experiment or if it would benefit me in a situation. But mostly I just am not interested so yes it would be out of choice. And when I actually flirt when I'm interested in someone my flirting style isn't for everyone
As an INTP, can confirm use of playfulness to flirt. Another element is my use of double entendre, especially in verbal communication. That’s when someone knows I’m really into them … which is rare.
Hit the nail on the head for ENFJs. I can be a little awkward, but I really enjoy the playful spontaneous banter that flirting requires. I suffer the same problems as ESFJ where I'm often mistaken as being flirty though and that's a pain.
I am an INFP and in my experience I'm pretty awkward romantically until 1. I'm drunk, 2. I'm feeling particularly cool that day (probably drunk), or 3. I've known the target for a long time already.
I think that INFPs don't really like to flirt or "can't" flirt is because of Se trickster. Se is somewhat the "shameless fun"-function and I've observed that INFPs have some sort of correct, sacred stiffness to them (a combination of Fi and Si I suppose), some earnest refusal of "superficial" fun, because they percieve it as something more or less immoral and coarse.
Thoughts of an INTJ. I rarely flirt with people, but it doesn't mean I can't do it. I've tried to force myself to flirt before, but I can't unless I'm flirting with someone I actually want to flirt with for whatever reason. I have a few friends that I think are good people that I flirt with, and once in a blue moon I'll meet a girl that I can tell immediately they're a good person and I flirt with them just fine. It's really funny when this happens because most of my friends have no idea I can do this and consider me an emotional invalid. I think it's a combination of functions. Firstly, Ni Hero pretty much means that if I don't want to do something I'll have no motivation to do it. Hence, I can't flirt with just anyone on command. Second, Fi Child gives me a strong moral compass and a lot of sympathy for the victims of my "friends" that toy with/abuse others emotions, so my repressed regretful memories (Si Demon) help a lot. Third, Fe Trickster means that I don't use systems. I just don't understand them, and it's sometimes really frustrating. However, it also means that the way I flirt is erratic, spontaneous and genuine. If I don't like someone, I'm too proud to pretend otherwise (Fi Child) and I simply can't come up with something I like about them because I'm afraid of making them uncomfortable (Se Inferior); it's enough that I don't interact with them, but how will being cruel help them to improve? So I completely agree with you, we are bottom of the barrel from my experience because we can't turn it on whenever we like. Due to this, when an INTJ flirts it has a sincerity to it but very little tact, so we're pretty good at it but ill-practiced
As an Infp, my niceness comes off as *kinda* flirtatious sometimes?? Especially on text, when I love something someone’s done, I think I smother them with compliments (it’s what I genuinely mean, of course) in a lot of detail. So I do realise how people might think I’m interested in them… although it’s a different thing that I’ll probably love you if you give me the slightest attention shsushjshhsj-
You got me. ESTJ here, and, yes, flirting is something I can do, but it loses usefulness quickly. I want intent, not possibility. I prefer to flirt within an established relationship as a fun, regular mode of communication. But if I’m looking for a person? Direct and forward is where it’s at.
Spot on about the ESTP!! 'Twas swept off my feet by one and married to him for 20 years (I'm an ISTJ). He definitely honed in on me and immediately noticed and evaluated my quirks, but made me think they were charming rather than annoying. He could win over a room and be everyone's best friend~~oh, to be that light on my feet! :-)
Hahaha that is SO ENTP. I really DID used to think people would thank me for the community service of correcting them and now I don't care about whether they do or not.
An istj once tried flirting with me multiple times and I got scared, firstly because I didn't like them and also because they were acting completly opposite to their personality. Like irl they would be all boring and unemotional then they would text me all these incredibly flirtatious messages and overuse emojis. I think they were trying to copy their esfp ex, but ye it freaked me out icl
Wow, I expected us INTPs to be lower. It makes sense, but I’ve lost any ability or interest in flirting as I’ve gotten older. Now I’m too self conscious and get embarrassed either by flirting or being flirted at.
INFP here. I experience the exact situation you described: not flirting, but being flirted at. Bad thing about that is that I'm hopelessly unaware of their intentions and go along with it, seemingly giving hints when I don't mean to. When I feel comfortable around people I do tend to get a bit more adventurous with teasing and flavouring my speech a bit, which could possibly be seen as flirting (one of my good friends at least took it as such). Being on the aromantic spectrum is possibly why I'm so ignorant in these manners. However, when I feel playful it might become a bit chaotic. Thankfully most of my friends now know that it's just how I am and I get clingy and like teasing sometimes.
Enfp. I flirt therefore i am! I absolutely love having a laugh and making other people smile and what better way to give someone the warm and fuzzies by a little bot of flirty banter?? So much fun :)
I always feel caught in both INFP and ENFP, quizzes flip back and forth for me though typically land on INFP. It makes me wonder how mental illnesses like bipolar disorder, which I’ve been diagnosed with, plays into these personality types and how we self identify. Since recently starting taking medication, I feel I identify more with ENFP than before, but both types I highly identify with
3:39 I'm an INFP with a well-developed ENFJ side. And I'm also an e9 that had a sorta flirty ENFP mother I emulated from a young age. It's always been pretty easy for me to spark romance even in ordinary situations; & meaningful romance, at that-not merely superficial. -- It's true, though, that I get hit on far more often than I make advances toward others. In some cases this is invariably so-e.g., when the respective other has a direct & initiating interaction style. But a lot of the time I vet people from afar & conduct thought experiments in my imagination before approaching. In some cases, though, I've long before meeting someone decided they were my type, or my Fi+Ni actually gives me premonitions about them before meeting them. If either of these is the case, I might rarely approach someone romantically on the first or second encounter, based off my premeditation &/or intuitive instinct.
INFP Ive Read a few books on " how to flirt", I deeply desire the skills to be able to do it and in my thoughts I am an excellent theatrical flirt. If I could let my inner beast come to the surface and endulge its self in conversation, it would be very witty and extremely seductive. However that part of my self is hidden in the depths of me, and will come out only to the people who truly earn it. The people who look beneath the surface and see more, will be rewarded and that I believe makes it more spectacular and special. INFPs value deep connection and will reveal more once trust is astableshed. We yern for emotional intermacey and playful interaction, but we may hide our crude, flirtatious side when the interactions are on the surface, perhaps out of morality, loyalty and our devout search for sacred love. ... But who knows 💁♀️
I think, for INFPs, pickup lines and other short form interactions don't really encompass the depth of emotion they might be feeling. The intensity with which they experience their emotions makes it hard to communicate to others. I think it applies in this area as well. Though, if they're with the right friends (usually ExFPs), they can joke-flirt well enough. And, of course, it's much easier to imagine an entire life with them and be vaguely disappointed when it never happens, than to actually take action because of the blind spot Se. So, in conclusion; yes, dirty fanfiction is much more likely than direct flirting.
INFP here - I flirt a lot but I do it very subtly, or ambiguously most of the time. It would be more quippy and with use of a good twist of words. It's a lot of fun until those quips go over someone's head, then I feel stuck waiting for the next opportunity to slide one in. I can be bold, albeit rarely... but I'll just chalk those times down to surges of confidence.
As an INFJ I overthink if and how I should flirting so much. Its always a battle between, "Was that too obvious?" and, "Was that too subtle?" when I flirted by saying something like 'You look cute today' to someone I've known for over a year.
ENFP here and I'm not a flirt at all. Other people assume I'm flirting and flirt back and then I get excited only to realize that it was a means to an end for them and they wanted something from me when all I wanted was a witty conversation. Yeah. I don't really talk to single men all that much anymore.
ENFP here, I can agree to an extent. I am super friendly and bubbly, which people sometimes mistake for flirting when I'm just being friendly. However, if I like you FORGET IT I'm all over you like a bee to honey HAHA
I am an ENTP and I have what I call a curse. I am very flirtatious, unknowignly and several people has fallen for me, but sadly it is not the people I want to be with. However, I have never ever been able to be with any of my crushes. Like my crushes do not even become my friends, or maybe only distant friends. Somehow all my crushes hate me somehow. Or they seem to like me and suddenly they hate me. Sadly, I do not care about sex and or appearances, because I would be very succesful if I did, but I simply don't. I am more interested in the person, and the people I want simply... well they aren't in me. I mostly care to find someone with a good heart and great mind. Which I have found some, but maybe it is because I get way too excited when I find one, that I scare them off.
Oh lol, I went on a tangent, what i wanted to say mainly, was that I unknowningly flirt with people. Like My Ne Fe might make it seem like I am interested in the person, romantically.
As an ENTJ yeah we have a gregarious side other than the suited business image. I personally like flirting because of the reactions I get or just to entertain myself really or to get something out of the person
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As an INTP, I feel wronged
Here’s for the people who wanna skip to their type since I didn’t see one yet:
ESTJ 0:00
ISTJ 1:04
INFP 2:33
ENFP 3:51
ISFP 4:47
ESFP 5:44
ESFJ 6:44
ISFJ 7:48
ENTP 9:17
ENFJ 10:34
INFJ 11:34
ISTP 12:32
ESTP 13:15
ENTJ 14:07
INTP 14:53
INTJ 15:50
Thank you
That's so kind of you. Thank you
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My sister is an INFP and growing up she always had so many guys interested in her, especially in high school and college. People would call her out on flirting when she didn't mean to. However, when she actually was interested in someone, her flirting skills were zero. Now she's in a happy relationship with an INTP so it doesn't come up as much!
The tragedy of being INFP. We just being nice & comfortable around people often gets mistaken for attempts at flirting & whatnot. Hell, the overwhelming majority of us DON'T even have a flirt switch & most probably NEVER developed one!
I’m curious as to how they got together because speaking as an INTP myself, the IN_P’s in general aren’t that great in flirting or confessing their love
Similar INFP. I use to flirt outrageously to put others at ease, yet I was horrified if anyone mistook it for REAL FLIRTING?!. I'm much more of a single-for-life type.
INFP here, not a fan of flirting with strangers and really awkward when interacting with my crush, but man, when I am comfortable with someone... It's a whole different story. I flirt with my best friends all the time, it is almost a love language to me - as is constantly teasing them. Last year it even got to the point where I almost ended up in a relationship with one of them because of all the flirting and the deep connection we had in the first place. So, I think INFP's are great at flirting, as it is, in a way, just playing with words and being quick-witted. But only with people we feel comfortable showing our true selves to, so that kind of leaves all the people we actually should be flirting with😂😂
See, that later part, ain't actually flirting. It's just us being in our element, being very comfortable & just outright being nice. We do that with just about everyone we're comfortable around, crush or otherwise. It's just a thing we do that others MISTAKE for attempts at flirting. To be a good flirt, hell, to actually flirt, it has to be something intentional & targeted, & THAT is where we often end up crashing & burning.
I full on agree! I couldn't have said it better
Totally agree. It's a love language with my friends! I'm so flustered if I want it to be intentional, i can't get through with it just stand their all red fucking my head like a stupid teenager! 💀
The ESFPs or ESTPs would definitely get my vote for "Most Flirtatious", but I've known a few ISFPs or ISTPs who can be VERY coy when it comes to flirting!
ISFP I'm actually very flirty in a shy weird way but it works lol But I can be very bold sometimes if I'm sure the person likes me back.
😘😂 thank you queen! - ESFP
There is no better way to describe it than “coy.” Spot on.
As someone who is friends with an ESFP and ESTP, I fully agree. I'm pretty sure this ESTP has flirted with me before which leaves me confused as heck but oh well
@@jacobandersen6075 I firmly agree
INFPs: The most romantic but one of the least flirtatious types.
That's an oof lol
Yep. Totally agree. I am an INFJ and I will follow your trail blaze with that one. Romance is seriously a dying trend and now we are left to be told to take self care into consideration more. That to me is selfish. This is what has caused women to be more entitled and for men to become more submissive over the decades and it is causing a huge problem on a mans masculinity. They are predominantly letting us women have empowerment. It is no wonder that the world is crumbling apart. We need harmonious balance. Let us stop competing in the Gender boxing ring , and instead start to love and respect each other.
@@tonyharrison1726 treat her with respect and she starts calling u soft lol
@@tonyharrison1726 Nah, I don't think romance is gonna die any millenia soon.
Well romantic isn't always equals flirty
I'd say it's kinda funny as an ENFP to think about flirting. Like when I've actively tried it, I've been very very awkward, and ultimately failed, but when I'm just messing around or being kind, it gets connected with flirting. So In a way you're probably right, but it's also one of those things where it isn't actual flirting cause *I'm not actually trying it just looks like it*. I feel like that old spice commercial with just "I'm on a horse" but it's mostly cause I'm having fun... but I guess people are very positive to that 🤣 it can get awkward...
As an ENFP that has been my experience as well.
I agree! being friendly, laughing, and making someone else feel good about themselves by giving them time & attention seems to be easy… but if I’m actually attracted to someone and try to flirt it comes out super awkward and it’s so embarrassing 😂
THIS!!!
I think this is the burden of E__P females. The playful nature will get automatically seen as interest.
absolutely! the way to tell if i have a crush on you is that i *stop* flirting with you, because i suddenly start actively thinking about it and it makes me incredibly flustered and awkward haha
What I (as one INTJ) can say is that the limited amount of "flirting" that I engage in entails a series of probing, interrogative questions. All of which I ask in order to understand the person's deeper motivations, principles and long-term ambitions.
I wouldn't mind being asked or answering these questions myself, but it seems like they make many people either uncomfortable, bored or both (which I'm guessing is quite antithetical to the typical goal of flirting). Especially when it turns out that most people my age don't seem to think about such things a lot, or really at all.
I wouldn’t mind being asked these too ~ enfp
This sounds exactly like how I naturally “flirt” as an ISTJ
Provide examples, cause this sounds creepy. (Also intj)
Fun fact. I once attempted to do small talk with my standard three safe subjects, music, movie & series, hobbies.
After that the guy (almost total stranger) i was talking with ~a total extrovert~ dm me to go out. Ofc i declined. The poor soul didn't believe when i said i truly don't consume alcohol any more.
I flirt like this if I find someone worthy of such a response from me, but I tend to do exactly these things as well. I like to make attempts to show that they have a high priority with me at that current time and I'd like to make them happy by doing things that they enjoy or find interest in. It helps me to understand them on a deeper level, and to see what our compatabilitiy levels may be like if I decide to pursue if given the green light in return. Though, it's incredibly rare for me to actually take an interest in anyone in that manner. (INTJ-A female :D ). At the same time, I also seem to scare people with how straight forward I am about any feelings I may have about them -_-
@@fayem4091 I have difficulties recalling adequately illustrative instances at this moment, but one of my standard questions is "Do you have any words that you live by?".
When they do, I ask them follow-up questions for them to elaborate on their idea(s) in different ways, so that I can get an insight into the core of their philosophy, and judge that accordingly.
If their answer is "No", I encourage them to think about it. This doesn't need to be a short, catchy phrase or anything, but just some form of definable foundation that guides them throughout existence and it's plentiful challenges.
Essentially, I ask them what they do and why. I don't really "let them go" in that respect, which might be a significant cause of discomfort. I also notice and point out if they do not answer one or several of the questions. If this becomes a pattern, I question their avoidance (unless it's information that, if uncautiously shared, would potentially pose a physical threat).
But I figure that if I can ultimately get them to think more seriously and live more purposefully, then my objective of the interaction is, more or less, completed. With that said, the right person will not be opposed to my true goals and motives, so I imagine that the ideal scenario would be when the person is willing to answer important questions and does so with mutual intrigue.
I realize that this isn't really what most people are looking for when flirting, but if flirting requires me to disregard the deeper meaning and long-term implications of the interaction (to make it playful, one might say) then I suppose flirting simply isn't for me. Because such an act would not be in accordance with my greater vision.
As an ENFP, I absolutely agree ! Most of the time, people don’t understand that we don’t necessarily want something as a result of the conversation. Sometimes I am flirtatious just because it’s fun and it’s a great way to put yourself in a social mood (even in moments I’m in a not talkative moment). So yeah, flirt is more like a game with two players. I mean it’s cool if you end up in a relationship, but it’s cool as well to flirt for the pleasure to flirt and talk.
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You guys are the total opposite of us. I will never get you. Especially all the extroverts.
Omg j get overwhelmed from all the colours in the supermarket, let alone all the facts i have to learn and sort about a stranger, let alone i like, let alone i might (like my 16yo niece would say) like-like....
You guys are too much.
~intj
@@fayem4091 I'm ISFP, highly extroverted when I'm alone with my mind yet the naturally introverted in social settings.
I do get the ENFPs' view of personal pleasure. I'm just a kid and so I resonate with the concept. But yeah, what good in return are you have by giving in to your fantastic and youthful desires? Neither their parents, nor their future selves won't benefit to it.
I've been dating an ENFP for a while, & it's such a different story when they're truly in love.
@@fayem4091 I am an ENTP. What can we do better, do less and do more, how could we soften our extroverted energy - we need a clue-
I feel exactly the same as an ENTP!
(INFP here) My experience is that I haven’t actually tried flirting. I just Don’t. Know. How. To properly flirt. Most of the time, I’ll be crushing on someone and depending on my relationship with them and who they are to me already, that may or may not be apparent. I must mention that when I like someone, banter and more teasing is done is done my part cause I’m scared to be *too* nice that it makes things awkward🥲 whenever I’m nice, I tend to come off too strong lol. Yea… awkward. That’s the perfect word for my love relations.
As for the video like I said, the closest thing I get to flirting is banter. And I’ll imagine entire scenarios with a crush without ever making a move.😂
There has never been more truthful statement
As an ISFP, I definitely resonate with the full on/off notion. Mood and interest level play a huge factor in how I’ll interact. Thought it was an individual quirk, but I'm starting to think it's common among ISFPs
Very common, I agree. At least from my trying to flirt _with_ them perspective. - ESTP
So no objective constancy
Yes. But for me I think the biggest factor is whether I like the person I’m interacting with or not (which I obviously usually know instantly upon meeting someone lol) and whether or not I feel like the person I’m interacting with likes me. If I don’t like someone, I’m instantly off. If I think they don’t like me, then why bother? Off again. But if I do like someone, the flirt is automatically turned way up lol totally subconscious I have no idea how it happens
@ddm584 i thought INTJs aren't controlled by their feelings?
@ddm584 no. That'd make you a feeler. Not everyone's a slave to their feelings. Everyone has feelings
This is such a comfort channel for me. I'm really struggling with life at the moment, but watching these videos just makes life so much better. Thank you ❤️🥐
Same I love this channel 💙 I struggling with life too for any weeks. INFJ.
Knowledge, theories, learning, make me feel better.
Mate... With such a name - I believe you. I totally believe you.
Can relate…
Same! 💚
As an INTJ I have to say that I have been very flirtatious... with the two women I liked in my life so far.
Underrated comment.
Lol. Same. As an INTJ, I'm pretty good at flirting too, but only with a few people.
@@micahmock3505 can I know how u guys flirt... especially through texts?
INFP here - the last time I was head-over-heels for someone I actually used to dread seeing him because I was so awkward around him. Openly flirting was out of the question! I am good with words, on paper only.
Someone else has mentioned that they sometimes give people the idea they're attracted to them without meaning to. This has been a huge nuisance to me too. Almost always much older guys, incidentally. Also, there's nothing more mortifying (and irritating) than being rejected mid-innocent conversation by someone you genuinely have no interest in!!
Infp here
I have this problem too
Though never with older men
INFP, totally agree. I don't really do flirting, I do ~pouring out my heart and soul~. Or just being friendly. Or watching mysteriously from afar.
Seems to me INTPs and flirting is a potent but very chaotic combination. The flirting techniques of choice might be so outre that few people realize they are attempts at flirting, and at the same time there's a good potential of just enthusiastic good-spirited wittiness which can come off as flirtatious without the INTP even realizing it...
And we are notoriously bad at picking up the flirting of others.
So "sometimes" sounds right, but a good deal of it misses its target or happens despite ourselves...
There was no proof (Ti) of anyone flirting with me, and I could think of any number (Ne) of other meaning their words might have had between the lines.
Therefore I conclude that humans can't read each others thoughts in any circumstance and anyone claiming to is lying to themselves.
So if anyone flirts with me I stay ignorant of the fact.
INTPs are freaks it's dope
-entp
This is 100% true. I try and flirt with my crush and now she sees me as the “weirdo emo friend who people like for some reason” 💀
Accurate ISTP assessment, as usual. To add to your description, I’d say we can be pretty sly - but in an obvious way. Our intentions? Clear as day. The humor and comments we use to achieve said intentions? You might have to think for a second to realize the clever execution. We definitively have a characteristic flirting style, imo at least. ~ISTP
INFP here, & I've actually been told in the face by a girl, that i was really awful at flirting. Much as i'd like to prove you wrong, i'd say that even the best among us in the game could only kinda get the basics right & little else.
Among Us is not a good place to practice flirting imo
amogus
As an INFP I have to say I'm terrible with flirting, not just with the attempting to (I don't think I ever have really), but also when someone tries to flirt with me, even if I like them I'll just start giggling uncontrollably because I don't know how to respond and then cover my face. it's a good job I don't mind my own company.
Finally someone who acknowledges the other side of ENTJ! We are far more complex than many people like to paint us as! 😤
I'm an ENFP and I totally agree with you about my type. I have to add that I was the one who had to make the more obvious moves when I met my INTP guy. But his flirtatious talk included the mating habits of Komodo Dragons. This kind of dragon is real, not fantasy. We both have a very playful side and have weathered almost 3 decades together, even though we don't always agree.
100% INTP 😂
That’s adorable
I'm with your intp 😂🙋
-intp
I'm an INTJ and my girlfriend is an ISFP. When we first met, we hit it off _very_ well, which neither of us usually experience with other people, since we can both be reserved and uninterested in what others do or want. She's one of a handful of people I have chosen to flirt with, and the few times prior to that were a disaster because I was not a fully-realized person. She had initially told me no, actually, because we were online friends and she wasn't willing to do long-distance, which was fine, we valued our friendship and wanted that to remain intact. But it flipped around when I moved to her state (she was not the reason, it was to remove toxicity in my life) and she became immediately open to dating. I think you described us both pretty damn well with her ISFP tendency to be either on or off, and how an INTJ can do things expertly but chooses not to. lol I don't know how you do it, but you're definitely one of the few channels I think has personality type down in both generalization and nuance.
The interaction with your girlfreind sounds pretty similar to mine with my ISFP boyfriend! The first time we met we started chatting very easily, although we are both reserved. And then I am the one who initiated the next interactions leading to dating (I don't know if we can call this flirting though, just finding excuses to chat online lol), while in the past I was the one being flirted on by extroverts... Actually I think I don't like when men try to flirt with me. It makes me feel like a helpless prey, I don't know how to respond to it so the interaction ends up being unbalanced. It only works if the interaction flips to being an interesting conversation (yeah with ENFPs and ENTPs, I admit)!
ENTP here.. I guess I am usually a good flirt because I enjoy having playful, fun conversations and am open to any topic.. But if I'm intentionally trying to flirt with someone I'm attracted to, sometimes I'm great at it and at others, quite awkward
Haha yes I’ve witnessed this often with an ENTP
Yeah I never flirted with my SO cause be made me nervous but i flirt often with random ppl I don't even feel attracted to lmao I think it's just to make them better about themselves idkk
You have awaken an embarrasing memory in me, Nathan.
I NEVER flirt, but one day, I decided (for some reason) to write a love poem to a girl I liked. The next day, I gave it to her before entering classes, and her twin sister was with her.
I
GAVE
IT
TO HER
IN
PERSON
how?
-INFP in denial.
@Linda Torres She took it, at least. I remember when I gave it to her she looked at her sister and the whole situation was a little bit weird.
I sometimes wonder if she kept it or not. She had a boyfriend then (if I'm not mistaken), so the result was obvious. Maybe our relationship did change a bit, but nothing remarkable.
I'm awkward anyway 🤣
Pd: At least you didn't reject him in a very direct way. Could be worse.
@Linda Torres There's always a first time.
Wait for the right one and go with confidence when the moment is perfect.
I’m an eccentric and playful INFP with adhd, and people have always thought that I am constantly flirting!! Even when I was in kindergarten. It’s horrible. I hate the accusation and misunderstanding. I don’t even know how to flirt, I’m 24 F and I never had the chance to learn that because I’ve experienced that every single human male on this earth is wired to experience curiosity, respect, friendliness, and presence, all out of my personal principal and nature, as sexual interest. I also can’t recognize when a man is flirting with me unless if it’s super sexually foreword and direct.
Side note- I love the thumbnail!
I'm an INTP. I don't know if that has anything to do with what I'm going to say about this, but here I go. I hate the idea of flirting. I think direct communication of intent is the most meaningful (which is a subjective notion) because it takes guts to be clear about how you're feeling. Guts that I rarely demonstrate. I have more respect for people who can be direct about that than people who are socially smooth. I also learned pretty recently that some people flirt with their friends, and when I learned this, I remember thinking in that moment: "Are you serious??? I hate people!!"
Anyway cool video! Interesting stuff as always. I hope anyone who is reading this has a good day or whatever you call "now" in relation to the sun's placement in the sky or in the depths of hell.
"I like you, take it or leave it"
This. I deeply appreciate when people are direct with me, but I suck at doing it myself
YESSS Same!
YESSS Same!
me too
direct communication mean less wasted energy
Loved this video. As an INFJ female, my ESTP work colleague use to slam me constantly for flirting, when all I was doing was being a friendly social chameleon. I can spot if someone is being flirty with me in a heartbeat, and I for the best part want to run for the hills. My Se inferior cannot cope with the unwanted attention. Unless I like them of course. Like you say, I take my sweet analytical time to mentally screen them to come to a " is this worth going for?" verdict.
Yup
'want to run for the hills' you've got it spot on 😂 I hate the attention but the chameleon survival mode kicks in haha
@@imurcatmom HaHa. Nice to know I am not on my own. People get us so wrong at times don't they. Thanks so much for the response.
Haha I can relate to this so much. Especially the mentally screening them part. Sometimes I feel like I’m being too fussy when I do this, but I think it’s just how we work as INFJ’s? 🤷♀️
@@c_mendes omw i was just thinking the same 🤣
ISFJ here, and you nailed it. I struggle with flirting because I'm afraid I'm flattering myself if I read something as flirting that isn't intended that way, and I never want to come across as feeling more than I do, so I am very reserved. It makes attempts to date super difficult, but when a relationship does happen, I feel much safer because we've been direct and up-front with each other rather than teasing and dancing all around each other and causing possible confusion and hurt feelings.
Excellent-concise and informative as usual!
As an ENFJ, I can sometimes come across as flirting when I’m actually just engaged in conversation and trying to figure out who this other person is. Likely is the correct spot for ENFJ, I believe. We are quick to turn it off if flirting wasn’t our intention.
ISFP here. Yes, we are 'full on, full off' in most things if I am in any way typical. Things and people that interest us get our attention, things that don't, don't.
When I was younger I used my skill at writing to flirt with girls online. Like showing off my literary muscles or something. :p
But when it comes to real-life flirting, I think INFP rather seek a deep connection with the other person, by engaging, talking, listening, sharing… rather than flirting. At least, that's my experience as an INFP. :)
Hi! An ISFP here. I noticed that when I'm fully interested with a person (be it an artist I idolize or an individual within a close proximity), I tend to go quite crazy. Not too much, because I also leave something for myself. I think in flirting, we kinda know how to balance whether to go or no go. It's like we try to assess:
"Will this (flirty) actions benefit me? Or hurt me?"
"Does this person ever is genuine with his intentions?"
"Can I make their lives better with me in the picture?"
Maybe too self-centered in a sense. For me, I can never ask myself if I'm good enough. I'm good and want good for you, so I deserve good treatment. And if that person somehow fell short on this, better luck next life.
INFP here! I must say I consider myself quite the flirt. If this were just about me, I’d put myself in the Likely category. Of course it’s not just about me, and there is range in every type :D but I do think I’m on the more wellspoke/better at communicating side of the INFP spectrum. I’m still painfully introverted and prefer to spend time alone, with my loved ones or pets, BUT when I am forced to be around people - at work, out at a bar etc, I find myself rather easily maintaining a bubbly and welcoming persona and people often seem to feel comfortable approaching and speaking to me. And when it comes to someone I feel drawn to, I must say I enjoy a bit of a flirt. Perhaps this is because I’ve been able to gain a sort of confidence over the years, and I have been in 2 longer term relationships so it’s not so foreign to me anymore? But all I know is that I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy the attention… i think it’s quite an INFP thing to enjoy feeling special/seen by people. Maybe my flirting is just that?
Same. My twin sister is an infp and she often tells me about her flirting experiences. I am an intj, and the exact opposite. I envy her for that though 😆
Your experience basically summarizes my INFP fiance. He has a very bubbly and welcoming persona when in social situations, but left to his own devices, he would be at home with just me, watching RUclips videos.
Not sure, this ENTP is unconvinced, I would have to get a taste of said flirtiness to confirm it. *ENTP grin*
What's your gender? I'm just curious because im starting to form the hypothesis that male infps might tend do be more communicative on average than female infps
Agreed, I think INFPs in a good state of mind, with a bit of playfulness and confidence, can be excellent flirts (when they're interested)
I'm an INTJ and I if I like someone I would probably just say it outright (after a month or so of observing them of course). If they're scared off, good, it probably wasn't meant to be. If they're somehow still around there's a chance it could work out in the long run.
Same!!!
ENTP - Probably the best one you’ve written. Can’t imagine a more complete or accurate answer. That’s hot.
I'm an INFJ and apparently just being myself is flirtatious enough that I've been mistaken for an ENFP on occasion lol
no, but seriously, a lot of people seem to think they're my soulmate when I'm not trying to flirt at all. on the rare occasion I do flirt on purpose, there's no mistaking it in the form of sheepish admiration or exaggeratedly contrived smooth moves 💥😏😂
I think the INFP doesn’t always flirt because they are too noble.
-INFJ
As an ISFP I resonate with the off and on thing very much, I grately shape my appearance unconsciously when talking to different people
15:51 I think Personality Hacker answers the question about INTJ being unwilling to do many things they _could_ do very well.
Fi, nicknamed _authenticity_ in 3rd slot, AKA child.
In PH's car model you have the driver (dominant function), a co-pilot (strong, utility function), a child (complementary to the co-pilot; underdeveloped, very sensitive, and highly treasured), and a baby (complementary to the driver, cries and sh!ts itself making an already bad situation even worse).
On top of that, introverted decider (Fi/Ti) is tied to one's identity, and Ni/Se has no respect for rules and external authorities - Ni is fiercely independent, Se is outright rebellious.
So, IxTJs want to stay true to themselves, and I'd expect NJs to show it much more than SJs would.
Circling back to the original topic of flirting: INTJ who's core identity is based on romantic relationships would probably be quite flirtatious. I wonder if those even exist though.
Any other INTJ will likely see flirting as a waste of time and energy, and in some situations maybe even identity violation (play-pretend). There are other, more authentic ways to satisfy (modest) social needs, and when things become really hard, it's more _efficient_ (Te co-pilot / utility) to get your hands dirty or pay for a professional service.
Well said 👍
I am with you for what you said. I can sense a bit of "social engineering" for flirting, but I refuse to do it because they are highly against my Fi values. There was one case where I "joked around" with her level of humor matching with mine, but it was extremely exhausting.
My version of flirting is being Te professional at first, by yes, asking questions, then I more and more throw in Fi and it is pretty much Fi once very comfortable, depending on the person of course.
As an INTP, on the flip side, I am well aware of when I'm trying to flirt but have no idea when I'm being flirted with. My first two dates I had ever been on, I didn't even know were dates until days afterwards when said person was upset that I didn't call them back for another date (this was mid-90s...pre texting, even e-mail was something of a novelty).
Definitely been there before... whoops •.•'
Yup, the first major hurdle is for me to be remotely aware of someone is flirting with me the second is me convincing myself that the person is most likely not flirting with me.
In my experience with infps (ik a ton of infps) they tend to under-react to shocking or pleasing things they might be ashamed of, or simply don't want others to know they like.
I am an INFP and this described me exactly. So much so that when you mentioned writing dirty fanfic for someone as a means of flirting, I burst out laughing because of how eerily accurate that is for me personally.
INTJ... I like to ask random questions & figure the other person out, piece by piece. *Layer by layer* ... not the most conventional form of "flirting" but that's my love language ●__●
Yep, we don't flirt to Fe play, we flirt to Fi find the best/ right person for us. So our flirting is serious business!
Just because I'm nice to you and want to know your inner world and blueprint to your soul, doesn't mean I want to marry you - ENFJ
"ENTPs are often masterful at creating... sparks. Sometimes one that can lead to attraction, other times to thermonuclear explosions."
Such a force 💥
Also that thumbnail pic 😳😳💀
I can say for myself (I'm an INTJ) that I usually flirt with the intend of joking around.
Because when I notice that the person is flirting in a "true flirty way" I tend to get bored or ashamed for some reason and just want to get out of this interaction as quick as possible.
Same it feels "wrong" to me, probably because it often means forcing yourself to act a certain way
I understand the feeling very well. It might have something to do with the need of authenticity of your Fi.
-INFP
Friendly flirting is a default position for the EXFP types. I just really enjoy fun and silly conversations with people, and if it makes them feel good, that’s even better
The description of being on/off as an ISFP is right on, though sometimes the ESFJ problem of people latching on by misinterpreting my politeness with “flirting” is also a thing, which I find very annoying at times. I’m either not flirting, or I am /definitely/ flirting. There’s very little room for doubt between the two. Nicknames, poems, really laying it on, etc. It’s hard to miss lol.
INFP, and what you said was pretty much spot on... For teenage me. Post college, I started being able to handle the back and forth, but never really initiated it.
With my ENTP partner, when we started dating, it was very much a "boke and tsukkomi" relationship (or in British comedy terms, the wise guy and the straight man). Over the years, the roles now switch between us, because we both have that strong Ne and can be absurdist with each other. In public though, I'm still unintentionally seen as the more serious one.
As a female infj, I think you are 100% right about what you said. At first some people might think I'm a little shy or reserved but after getting to know me better I can become really flirty, especially after I have analyzed what each person would like to hear or what would make them laugh or even blush. My really close friend is an esfp and she is flirty 24/7 and when I'm with her I kind of catch up on her flirtiness and become like that too. Also, combined with sometimes really dark humor that people don't expect from me at all, they can be really surprised once I open up to them, haha
I’m an ISFP. I can be extremely flirty, but only if im seriously interessted. So you are right. I would never flirt just for flirting. So it’s actually rare. I can be charming if I want something, but it needs an extra focus.
I'm an INFP personality and in my younger years I flirted a lot, regardless of whether I was dating others or in a relationship (harmless fun). Agree others initiated the flirt, but I enjoyed the banter. I think I still flirt a bit, even after over 20 years of marriage. Oh, and the insight that we tend to be reserved even when acting flamboyantly and / or showing eccentricity is spot on. I've been described as friendly yet aloof.
An ISFP. Sometimes I flirt without realizing it, and people misunderstand, but most of the time, it is just fun teasing people and they misunderstand (or maybe I am not so clear). I also saw a few ISFPs flirting in a not so clear ways, leaving my friends to question their words and actions (and ISFPs probably didn't give a second thought about it)
Yeah, I like to tease people who reciprocate well (tease back or get flustered). It is fun. But most of the time, it doesn't matter who the person is and if I like them romantically or not. I just enjoy the interaction. I may flirt one time and be closed-off the next time we meet, depending on my mood.
This is fascinating. As an INTJ, I will differ. You need to be more specific. With most people I dont know, I question them. I usually dont flirt with strangers, I drill them, question, give a death stare. But with my soulmate/other half, I am a passionate, lascivious, hot blooded seductive flirt.... very sensual.
This is very accurate. As an INTJ happily married to an INFJ, we flirt with each other practically all the time. Ask either of us to flirt with someone we don't want, and you're unlike to get your ask, however.
Are you trying to flush out the ISFP’s watching your channel? 🤣 Great video, as always!
As an ISFP myself I think you where spot on with the full on / full off thing. Most of the time it depends on my mood, the situation or the person. For instance, if I am tired, I don’t give a crap about anything and I just want to be left alone.
When it comes to flirting it really depends on whether I am comfortable with the person I am with, and if I sense if he’s interested in me or not. In that case I can even be teasing and flirting without really being aware of it myself.
Lol I just commented something so similar and then I read this! Totally agree.
I'm an infp, and I can confirm that you've got us pegged.
Yes you're right about ISFPs. I personally am either completely uninterested in a member of the opposite sex or completely invested.
I’ve noticed (as an INFP) that if I SEEM to be flirting then I’m really just being nice. If I intend to flirt, then it gets all awkward and weird and then I want to melt into the background.
I’ve also noticed that if others flirt with me, I tend to go into shy mode way too easily, regardless of whether I like the other person or not. ☺️
So glad it's not just me
Yeah I honestly don't flirt unless I'm pretty damn sure I want something with the person. When such is the case, I like to be playful and seductive, which somehow I'm not bad at, despite rarely ever doing it.
ENFP talking to just anyone: Lay that friendly (misinterpreted as flirty) on thick. Pull out all those flirtatious, witty banter. Smile, body language, the works. E
ENFP actually flirting: So, do you like Potatoes? If you were a Potato, what kind of Potato would you be?
If you think an ENFP is flirting with you, they probably are not. If you think they are the most awkward thing you have ever laid eyes on, they are probably flirting.
INFP here, whenever I try to be close with someone, I feel it often goes over their heads XD Maybe it doesn't tho and they're just keeping it to themselves to not hurt my feelings- How can I say for sure when I never confessed to them to begin with? 😅
ISFP here and you nailed it❤️
I, INFP here, can really only speak for myself of course, but I'm curious if any other INFPs might relate to this. I'm kind of a natural flirt, but I probably think of flirting a little differently. I think of flirting as the energy that bubbles up either between people or within an individual that is similar to the energy of being in "flow state" but in the very extroverted sense. It's a happy enthusiasm while being very at ease in your interactions and speech and inspiring that ease and enthusiasm in others. I flirt with all kinds of people and it's very rarely because I'm thinking of that person in a romantic or sexual way. I feel good about myself when I can create a space that allows for others to feel comfortable, or better yet, feel confident. It serves my own need for harmony. Granted, it sometimes ends up being misconstrued by somebody and it's never fun to have to correct that perception. If I’m flirting because I'm romantically or sexually interested, there's really no way of mistaking it for something else, it means I'm actively pursuing you. I'll typically wait til the other person makes the first move or gives me some sort of "tell" and then I pounce. More touching and smiling and laughing, holding eye contact just a little bit longer, and probably some dirty jokes peppered in here or there with a more tasteful or highbrow slant, lol. Any INFPs or people familiar with INFPs- thoughts?
Also an INFP and I would say that I'm terrible at flirting. But, I can relate to this "social flow" state. I can't imagine it happening if I had a crush on someone and not knowing whether it's mutual or not yet though.
What's intersting is that I'm an intj, but I have been told by people multiple times that I can come across as naturally flirtatious. I have been mistyped by people as a infp, enfp or entp before (I'm actually for real an intj though no doubt). But when I am actually flirting often times people don't realise it, either because I get incredibly sarcastic or harsher to people I actually like. Also I have a very distinct type of flirting I enjoy, so yes I am very good at pretending to flirt but i personally wouldn't consider it actual flirting
Flirting is play, which means it should be fun. So that means it EP land.
All or nothing at heart is 100 true. The level of openness to giving mid varies though. When I feel super connected to my true self, I like exploring, performing, embracing different parts of my persona. Because I’m at ease with who I actually am, I can have fun doing things, let’s say flirting just for the sake of it. It’s only when I lack a sense of self, I get super picky on things/people I do.
So probably the only time people think me as a full-on/full-off type of person is when I’m unbalanced, or around my dearest&closest one whom I can feel safe & guaranteed will love every aspects of me. Others might see me as like stereotypical Ne dom. (Also I’m an ADHDer)
I've never flirted in my life. Wouldn't know how to and don't think I'd ever try, mostly cuz I don't want to. Your analysis of INFPs was very accurate, for me at least.
Ye so true about intjs. When I want to I could fake flirt so well and sometimes I do just as sort of social experiment or if it would benefit me in a situation. But mostly I just am not interested so yes it would be out of choice. And when I actually flirt when I'm interested in someone my flirting style isn't for everyone
Having several INTP friends, I found the INTP assessment hilarious and accurate :-D
As an INTP, can confirm use of playfulness to flirt. Another element is my use of double entendre, especially in verbal communication. That’s when someone knows I’m really into them … which is rare.
Hit the nail on the head for ENFJs. I can be a little awkward, but I really enjoy the playful spontaneous banter that flirting requires. I suffer the same problems as ESFJ where I'm often mistaken as being flirty though and that's a pain.
I am an INFP and in my experience I'm pretty awkward romantically until 1. I'm drunk, 2. I'm feeling particularly cool that day (probably drunk), or 3. I've known the target for a long time already.
I think that INFPs don't really like to flirt or "can't" flirt is because of Se trickster. Se is somewhat the "shameless fun"-function and I've observed that INFPs have some sort of correct, sacred stiffness to them (a combination of Fi and Si I suppose), some earnest refusal of "superficial" fun, because they percieve it as something more or less immoral and coarse.
That is precisely my view on flirting. (INFJ here)
Thoughts of an INTJ. I rarely flirt with people, but it doesn't mean I can't do it. I've tried to force myself to flirt before, but I can't unless I'm flirting with someone I actually want to flirt with for whatever reason. I have a few friends that I think are good people that I flirt with, and once in a blue moon I'll meet a girl that I can tell immediately they're a good person and I flirt with them just fine. It's really funny when this happens because most of my friends have no idea I can do this and consider me an emotional invalid.
I think it's a combination of functions. Firstly, Ni Hero pretty much means that if I don't want to do something I'll have no motivation to do it. Hence, I can't flirt with just anyone on command. Second, Fi Child gives me a strong moral compass and a lot of sympathy for the victims of my "friends" that toy with/abuse others emotions, so my repressed regretful memories (Si Demon) help a lot. Third, Fe Trickster means that I don't use systems. I just don't understand them, and it's sometimes really frustrating. However, it also means that the way I flirt is erratic, spontaneous and genuine. If I don't like someone, I'm too proud to pretend otherwise (Fi Child) and I simply can't come up with something I like about them because I'm afraid of making them uncomfortable (Se Inferior); it's enough that I don't interact with them, but how will being cruel help them to improve?
So I completely agree with you, we are bottom of the barrel from my experience because we can't turn it on whenever we like. Due to this, when an INTJ flirts it has a sincerity to it but very little tact, so we're pretty good at it but ill-practiced
As an Infp, my niceness comes off as *kinda* flirtatious sometimes?? Especially on text, when I love something someone’s done, I think I smother them with compliments (it’s what I genuinely mean, of course) in a lot of detail. So I do realise how people might think I’m interested in them… although it’s a different thing that I’ll probably love you if you give me the slightest attention shsushjshhsj-
You got me. ESTJ here, and, yes, flirting is something I can do, but it loses usefulness quickly. I want intent, not possibility. I prefer to flirt within an established relationship as a fun, regular mode of communication. But if I’m looking for a person? Direct and forward is where it’s at.
Spot on about the ESTP!! 'Twas swept off my feet by one and married to him for 20 years (I'm an ISTJ). He definitely honed in on me and immediately noticed and evaluated my quirks, but made me think they were charming rather than annoying. He could win over a room and be everyone's best friend~~oh, to be that light on my feet! :-)
"they're more of the type that are madly in love with you without you ever realizing it"
As an INFP, this encapsulates my love life 😂
Hahaha that is SO ENTP. I really DID used to think people would thank me for the community service of correcting them and now I don't care about whether they do or not.
I adore that thumbnail!
Being an ENFP is like you just say what you think in a way you naturally do and people consider that to be a flirting.
An istj once tried flirting with me multiple times and I got scared, firstly because I didn't like them and also because they were acting completly opposite to their personality. Like irl they would be all boring and unemotional then they would text me all these incredibly flirtatious messages and overuse emojis. I think they were trying to copy their esfp ex, but ye it freaked me out icl
Wow, I expected us INTPs to be lower. It makes sense, but I’ve lost any ability or interest in flirting as I’ve gotten older. Now I’m too self conscious and get embarrassed either by flirting or being flirted at.
As en enfp, flirting with you is my way to get closer to you, and i flirt with my friends sometimes too !
I think you were spot on with your infp assessment. Loved the visual of Prof Tolkien down the pub, not flirting 😅
However, I could see Tolkien being approached by many women and leaving them completely mystified.
Yep, me as ISTJ fully agree :D basically it's business all the time :)))
INFP here. I experience the exact situation you described: not flirting, but being flirted at. Bad thing about that is that I'm hopelessly unaware of their intentions and go along with it, seemingly giving hints when I don't mean to. When I feel comfortable around people I do tend to get a bit more adventurous with teasing and flavouring my speech a bit, which could possibly be seen as flirting (one of my good friends at least took it as such). Being on the aromantic spectrum is possibly why I'm so ignorant in these manners. However, when I feel playful it might become a bit chaotic. Thankfully most of my friends now know that it's just how I am and I get clingy and like teasing sometimes.
Enfp. I flirt therefore i am! I absolutely love having a laugh and making other people smile and what better way to give someone the warm and fuzzies by a little bot of flirty banter?? So much fun :)
I always feel caught in both INFP and ENFP, quizzes flip back and forth for me though typically land on INFP. It makes me wonder how mental illnesses like bipolar disorder, which I’ve been diagnosed with, plays into these personality types and how we self identify. Since recently starting taking medication, I feel I identify more with ENFP than before, but both types I highly identify with
3:39 I'm an INFP with a well-developed ENFJ side. And I'm also an e9 that had a sorta flirty ENFP mother I emulated from a young age.
It's always been pretty easy for me to spark romance even in ordinary situations; & meaningful romance, at that-not merely superficial.
--
It's true, though, that I get hit on far more often than I make advances toward others.
In some cases this is invariably so-e.g., when the respective other has a direct & initiating interaction style.
But a lot of the time I vet people from afar & conduct thought experiments in my imagination before approaching.
In some cases, though, I've long before meeting someone decided they were my type, or my Fi+Ni actually gives me premonitions about them before meeting them.
If either of these is the case, I might rarely approach someone romantically on the first or second encounter, based off my premeditation &/or intuitive instinct.
INFP
Ive Read a few books on " how to flirt", I deeply desire the skills to be able to do it and in my thoughts I am an excellent theatrical flirt. If I could let my inner beast come to the surface and endulge its self in conversation, it would be very witty and extremely seductive. However that part of my self is hidden in the depths of me, and will come out only to the people who truly earn it. The people who look beneath the surface and see more, will be rewarded and that I believe makes it more spectacular and special. INFPs value deep connection and will reveal more once trust is astableshed. We yern for emotional intermacey and playful interaction, but we may hide our crude, flirtatious side when the interactions are on the surface, perhaps out of morality, loyalty and our devout search for sacred love.
... But who knows 💁♀️
I think, for INFPs, pickup lines and other short form interactions don't really encompass the depth of emotion they might be feeling. The intensity with which they experience their emotions makes it hard to communicate to others. I think it applies in this area as well.
Though, if they're with the right friends (usually ExFPs), they can joke-flirt well enough.
And, of course, it's much easier to imagine an entire life with them and be vaguely disappointed when it never happens, than to actually take action because of the blind spot Se.
So, in conclusion; yes, dirty fanfiction is much more likely than direct flirting.
I never flirt with anyone. Even if someone flirts with me, I often change the subject because I get so uncomfortable haha
- infj
INFP here - I flirt a lot but I do it very subtly, or ambiguously most of the time. It would be more quippy and with use of a good twist of words. It's a lot of fun until those quips go over someone's head, then I feel stuck waiting for the next opportunity to slide one in. I can be bold, albeit rarely... but I'll just chalk those times down to surges of confidence.
As an INFJ I overthink if and how I should flirting so much. Its always a battle between, "Was that too obvious?" and, "Was that too subtle?" when I flirted by saying something like 'You look cute today' to someone I've known for over a year.
ENFP here and I'm not a flirt at all. Other people assume I'm flirting and flirt back and then I get excited only to realize that it was a means to an end for them and they wanted something from me when all I wanted was a witty conversation. Yeah. I don't really talk to single men all that much anymore.
☝🏼
ENFP here, I can agree to an extent. I am super friendly and bubbly, which people sometimes mistake for flirting when I'm just being friendly. However, if I like you FORGET IT I'm all over you like a bee to honey HAHA
You’re so intimidating… As an INFJ I’m usually the one analyzing people without them even knowing, but you make me want to hide!
I am an ENTP and I have what I call a curse. I am very flirtatious, unknowignly and several people has fallen for me, but sadly it is not the people I want to be with. However, I have never ever been able to be with any of my crushes. Like my crushes do not even become my friends, or maybe only distant friends. Somehow all my crushes hate me somehow. Or they seem to like me and suddenly they hate me.
Sadly, I do not care about sex and or appearances, because I would be very succesful if I did, but I simply don't. I am more interested in the person, and the people I want simply... well they aren't in me.
I mostly care to find someone with a good heart and great mind. Which I have found some, but maybe it is because I get way too excited when I find one, that I scare them off.
Oh lol, I went on a tangent, what i wanted to say mainly, was that I unknowningly flirt with people. Like My Ne Fe might make it seem like I am interested in the person, romantically.
As an ENTJ yeah we have a gregarious side other than the suited business image. I personally like flirting because of the reactions I get or just to entertain myself really or to get something out of the person