Why Must the Narcissist Always Mess With Your Mind?
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- Опубликовано: 6 окт 2024
- #narcissist #narcissism #hgtudor
Why is the behaviour of the narcissist so confusing? What are the common responses that result in people remaining stuck? What is the ultimate aim?
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So many lies. Constant shifting, changing, hiding, dodging and layers and layers of lies. On again, off again, 7 years of my life and the desperate need for something I don't even want. Thank-you HG.
Same Nancy this is some crazy shit
Never a truer word spoken. I so understand you. Hope you are healing and feeling better now. I wish you well.
She can't just like my mom
Well said!
Absolutely agree
Masters at mind fuckery...
💯
Anyone else ever hear the phrase “I hate drama” from the narc? I heard it constantly whereupon, he would create drama. Responses to his lunacy were always referred to as “attacks”. Consistently, any disagreement with his opinion, lies, victim hood, bullshit, all referred to as “attacks”. One trick pony. I’m still working towards ZERO, no reaction to this human excrement as a nothing, a zero.
Yea me too !!
Oh man the 'no drama' catch phrase 😂 do they all say it? Because that's uncanny
@@DebRoo11 Oh my, they DO!!! I've met so many people online with 'no drama' policies who've accused ME of causing 'drama' while I couldn't even figure out what they even meant by that. 'Drama' as in a Shakespeare play that isn't a comedy? a serious movie? I finally figured out that it's any display of emotion or even the slightest disagreement with, even daring to ask 'why?' of a narcissist. Or as a 'normal' friend of mine so aptly described it although she couldn't put her finger on what narcissism is, 'It seems to me that the people accusing _other_ people of drama are always the ones _causing_ it.'
When he joined a dating app (while I was in hospital very unwell) my friend got a notification that he had ‘liked her’ profile (they hadn’t met, but she knows what he looks like) and she called me to inform me, and matched with him to see what he would say - he said he was looking for a new wife and wanted someone grateful and NO DRAMA 😅
She gave me a month of silent treatment and when I called to talk about us I was anxious and thought it was my fault ...
She never apologized ... Never ... Nothing ...
And I, for wanting to continue the relationship, I was the one who apologized.
Today I realize that it was she who made me feel this way.
(assertion control)
This video was the most enlightening I've seen so far.
Thanks, again, for the legacy / work presented.
How many times I was left waiting. Anger building, rehearsing in my head the things that I was going to say to him... give him a piece of my mind...
But when he finally shows up, and speaks his unbelievable excuses of where he has been, which I let myself BELIEVE!!! the only feeling that I have is a sigh of relief, when I finally see him. Like a drug..
Drug. Chemical reaction in the brain
Yep SAME
@@dsoule4902
Manipülasyon gerçeği bozuyor bu da zihnin kimyasını ve bağımlılık burda başlıyor
This is exactly what’s happening to me as we speak and I’m tired 😓 I’m tired‼️
Same. You can get through this. Just find your happiness 😊
Make peace and harmony a priority in your life and reject any and all that restrict it
So glad I’m out of the crap 💩 sorry never happens …… so well put ….HG❤
You helped me figure out that I need to end these so called friendships. One narc is an alcoholic. I just thought it was his anger and alcoholic addictions. . .so I made excuses for his behavior. Some days he helped me and made me laugh and the next he would criticize me. I am a narc magnet. Time for me to end all of these abusive/exhausting relationships. I feel like I'll never meet a normal friend. It seems like most people don't have more than one true friend nowadays.
One true friend is all you need.
They say we only need a total of 3 to be really happy. I just discarded my narcissist friend. It will be 2 yrs. prior to that another narcissist friend. They love me! Always have. My blunt honesty 😟
Typical Narc apology- 'Im sorry YOU feel that way'....
So in essence, they do it because they can and we allow it to happen.
Sad but true
Until that one day when you don't. Only takes 1 day
You’ll be hurting over the obvious lies then once they open their mouth it’s like a Tylenol for headache ; your pain goes away because you believe everything they say. Maybe we prefer the lies to the obvious painful truth. It’s so sad that we are all involved with such people who are human destroyers .
“I never said that” or “it’s all in your head” totes narc.
According to you Hg it is their Narcissism, but what I have learned to do when I am in the presence of a Narcissist individual is not to come to their aid concerning anything. When it comes to money I am always broke( no residual benefit) When it comes to advising I say do what you think is the best(no character traits) When it comes to sex I am never in the mood (no residual benefit). When asked how do they look? I say how do you think you look. When I say these things I notice the stare, the rolling of the eye, and that smirked smile as if to say B***h just wait. I win they lose. Thank You, Hg for the excellent information
I try to be as boring as possible, just a dull little pebble.
Grey rocking
Mine used to say, "sorry if I did something to make you mad". Which we all know doesn't constitute an apology.
Omg... mine too. They are satanist scripts !! All the same, different names 💯🤡
Narcissism is a passionate subject. Through your sharp expossition & drs analysis I'm finally understanding this antagonistic behavior & its unconscious motivations. Lack of affection plus physical abuse, in an uncontrolled environment can manifest as self importance defense mechanism.
So during adulthood, this person who is looking for love but fear trust will find in admiration a much safer option. That's how the narcissist concilliate love w/o trust... the wound was that deep to never trust anyone again assuming all individials are going to behave in the same way as their perpetrator.
This person achieve in order to be surounded by admiration. After a period, same output from the same source can become boring, so the narc change the stimuli's polarity or the stimuli source.
At the subconscious, everyone needs to be loved, what happens w the narcissist is that they never knew true love from the beggining...its so alien to them that they can't even understand it. This person's injury is arrested in time. |**:
Every time I'm around a narc I can feel their jealous about me..
me too, because they are.
Same
Troll them. Stick a narc injury or wound right up the spooky.
xrouagial That's what the narcissistic people often believe though! Mind you, a lot of them ARE jealous and I've experienced it from many women over the years, due to being a petite person. I'm not beautiful, especially now that I'm older, but people said that I was attractive, which didn't help matters. I was even told by a group of young women, who treated me badly, that they were jealous. I had huge issues in regard to my looks though.
I really feel for young women, and even young men, nowadays, because the jealousy is much worse, due to social media. I'm aware that I went off the subject, but don't want to waste my writing now. ❤
@@pattayaesl7128 Thanks for the laugh, even though I don't like to intentionally hurt others. 😂
It when you’ve had enough and call them out that the true messing with of the mind begins. Their existence depends on a well maintained facade.
Narcissist are everywhere-most specially on social media and some of them don’t even know they are Narcissist.
Most of the Narcissist are people who works in the Government and some celebrities around the world .
Ugh god I am so happy to not have to deal with this anymore, I must have caused a giant narc Injury too because after years and years of fighting her I had finally deluded myself into accepting everything was my fault and she was so so happy to hear me say that but all that just for me to finally catch her cheating red handed and I couldn't take anymore of the lies, it was all true, everything I was gaslighted into not believing was true. It's still sad and still difficult to accept but these people won't change, they aren't going to have some moment of clarity and realize how they need to change and all the damage and pain and misery in their lives is their fault, the last text I got from her from some number I hadn't blocked was telling me how I was a liar and I used her for 6 years and I was fake and I was a sex freak pervert because I wasnt happy with her and her harem that I kept catching her messing around with or her lying down on her back once every few months and saying let's get this over with and the best part how I was narccistic, that drove home the point, she cheated on me, yet I was all of these awful things, they can never face what awful things they do so they will always project them on to their nearest and "dearest"
Demonic possession and spiritual corruption is real as the grass growing
So true!! My life wrapped up in 14:05 min!
yeah, i feel the same
Your work is invaluable HG. I am most grateful 🙏
me too
I appreciate that.
Just get out and stay out GOSO... And then you will mess with the narcissist's mind... Thx HG 💖
I want to believe this... but does it really?? They will just move on to the next, forget about you like you didn't exist.
@@sandragarraz8048 It'll mess with them at first, but yes, they quickly move on. However, they do want to know that they can come back whenever they want to get some supply, and they'll be pissed when they find themselves blocked everywhere. Stay no contact.
Thank you for these videos because I think I would have become mad because I wouldn’t have understood what was happening to me.
EXACTLY..these videos came RIGHT on TIME....me knowing it's not ME...is definitely a game changer
No apology will be forthcoming. I've seen enough narcs enter the grave with ZERO contrition. Nothing. It's a Gdamn black hole. Expect NO apology except crocodile tears
I can smell dangerous narcissist from far distance, Easy for me to handle because I know who they are
And I know their special medication 💊. if you can not handle them Walking away is the best option so you don’t be a prisoner slave to yourself
I could listen to this video every night
HG, thank you so much for explaining this. He has done my head in since day 1.
Hi there, I hope all is going good for you. The narcissist likes to mess around with a person's mind, it gives them a buzz to stress and confuse you.🤔
@@steadypace1262 thank you, dear, for writing to me. i am still suffering! i feel stupid for it. i blocked him, but i think about him 24/7, and don't sleep well.
Yep..mine ALSO... I KNEW something was OFF....I went against MY BETTER SELF...smh 😞 and there. are dire consequences behind THAT...
The obsession with video games. And the rage that I don't care for them. Oh the memories.
I've been binging old HG videos. They age like fine whiskey.
This was spot on.
Double minded unstable in all ways.
I will forever be a fan and a follower……Dear HG❤
Beyond accurate summary
I like how you can mirror to us, the compassion and empathy we feel…..how giving benefit of the doubt looks. I can more and more see the mind games. And how all are different in how it shows up. Trick is to get that it is what it is, no matter the different ways it shows up.
narcissist jealous of your spirit. but you HG you have spirit. even you are a narc we love you. you give so much. you deserve all the fuel cause you go against the river of life harmonicaly
Malignant narcissists do this the most to a T.
Wow. This hit home so much. Thank you HG.
"Being too weak to stand wondering why he'd ignore/never help"... I'd emotionally reason he himself hated being sick so I'd rationalize it w empathy instead of logic.
Once I was even blamed for having a seizure and passing out. I confronted him w that one but my physical health was seriously declining by that point.
I'm perfectly physically healthy now that he's out of my life .
But wow... Ur bringing back such clarity to things I had forgotten all those years ago. Holy confusion to Holy clarity.
HG, you have perfectly described my experience dealing with a narcissist. This is another core video that crystalizes the dynamic interplay between the narcissist and IPPS. Thank you once again HG for another outstanding video!
I did get after I realized what my parents were, that a way to identify one of these people is the total inability or refusal to apologize. Ever.
Awwww I love HG's voice
Addictive
Worn the T shirt, bought the shop. Done. No contact 4.5 month and more resolute not less. I've reciprocated the discard to said ex narc. But my one is a permanent discard
Keep up the fantastic and fascinating….. work ….HG❤
I so relish the fact I honestly don't miss this anymore. Ie I don't miss the Narc
Wow!
Thank you again, H.G.!
I felt like such a dumb ass looking so long for any apology or personal responsibility. I got one crumble that was more like pulling teeth. The half hearted "apology " showed no insight. It was insincere to keep me in but by then I was done with the formal relationship.
"Just once?"
No apologies
Rarely a peaceful holiday or occasion
No vacation without some drama
Just never going to happen. So helpful to hear this exact too familiar account out loud.
Yet another spot on video HG! I could relate to at least 80% or more of these manipulations! Some of them made me laugh out loud since I've spent enough years crying over him. I love listening to your videos when I'm driving in the car.
🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 ONE OF YOUR BEST! 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
I've shattered my wrist falling on black ice. I required surgery. Where is he? No where to be found but bitterness in my inbox. It is a flashback of when I was with my children's father, and he too was a Narcy. He fed me, and the children to the wolves when I severely got injured. Sixteen years I spent with him, and stood by his side. The clown after him; six years. Both narcs. Two injuries on me. Same outcome. Moral of the story? I was able to cut the strings immediately this time around after six years of ups and downs because I will NEVER re live the outcome of what I went through with my X. John, you are so far gone, and you're never getting back in. When things go "south" in your life people, see how quick they vanish... if it's not about them, it's about no one. Disgusting to say the least.
Good for you for you for cutting the strings! So sorry you had to go through all that.
@@minoozolala thank you! Everything happens for a reason! God wanted him GONE 🙏♥️
So amazing how HG can read the script of my life with the Narc and never having met either of us. Makes me know it was bad before I even suspected. And I suspected just 6 months in.
Precisely!
again…… thank goodness because of the revelation of your work….. otherwise l might still be there ….. what a horrific thought 💭 not going there……HG❤….
That was a good one!
Beginning 9:28 to 10:04 and 10:33 to 11:04 speaks of what I’ve suffered through for decades 😔
Spot on 100%.
No contact 4ever.
HG you must be knighted.
I already am, but thank you.
@@hgtudor-theultra Congratulations ! So was Jimmy Savile ! Only the creme de la creme get the honor of being knighted by the queen of the reptilians .
An ADHD toddler to teen is easier then a Narcissist to manage. And I know both from life experience over decades doing just that. Managing them
Thank You HG. I am failing but trying...
An narcissist will always be jealous always, they are so jealous of an empathist they got to bring you down to your knees and they do succeed but then I'm an empathist and I had him removed... So is he strong? Is he in control? No
I found the narcissist I lived with was so moany moany such a whiner whinger.. He was so like a naggy old woman.. Yeah he was verbal yeah he was offensive and all the name calling... Whinge whinge whinge even if you cooked it like that or like that he's such a robot and nothing more
I'm so glad I rid of that narc... Such a drag
Never right or wrong left or fkn right up or down omg he's so gone thank fk for that
No sorry required,I am amazed at what you said earlier and the amount of time you spent up in the air.You came out with the truth in a panic but I already knew it.All the same thank you,I can imagine what you thought was happening today and got the wrong end of the stick.Still if it prompted you to tell the truth.I did say I am protected. You made me laugh,you got in such a panic.You completely misread what was happening today.Still friends ?You are a lunatic with that machine.
One of your best videos... hits home hard unfortunately.. love the part another Fucken lie... and all the maybes we tell ourselves.
Superlative..a very useful video to help those in need ...
Yhey fear there will be no end to admitting a simple single singerie because of their guilt so deep inside due to what they have endured in the childhood.
06:20 I put up with this for 8 years 😢
07:08
08:10-08:40 onwards
This was/is my life
I think i got tricked by our mutual friends... it’s been 4 months since I’ve been discarded by my narc, and I’ve been hanging out with a common friend several times, and suddenly last Friday his gf (which is my ex’s bff) decided to hang with us (1rst time since the breakup) which I found odd, she chose the restaurant right next to the parc my ex usually trains, she told me that my ex knew we were hanging out this day but didn’t supposedly tell her in which parc we were going (although the restaurant was 50 m from the park). i ended up crossing path with her... i just looked at her and kept walking 🚶🏻♂️. The others stopped to say hello I just waited around the corner. It just feels like it’s a lot of coincidences
Extraordinary video!
HG thank you so much for your work! Definitely elucidated a few mysteries and gave me closure where I'd lost hope for it!
If you're taking suggestions on famous potential narcissistis to roast, might I offer Tess Holliday and Jameela Jamil as candidates?
Because, they do not have one of their own.
In a healthy sense
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!♡♡♡
I got left on my own one new years eve all dressed up and ready to go. They are such awful people.
That's a good word. H G says they aren't demonic or satanist. Others say they aren't evil. Regardless, they are definitely "awful" people.
Food for thought.
Thank you
lovely
Yeahhhhhhh!!!!♡
HG, hope you can do an update analysis on the Duke and Duchess's recent Opra Winfrey interview. And how Prince Charles is asserting control in the wake of these events. Seems to be a lot of discussion about how he is coping with the situation. Is Queen Elizabeth a narcissist? It would be entertaining for you to go one by one of the royal family and give your take as to what they are personality wise and what effect the other narcissists have on the other members of the family.
pagesix.com/2021/03/08/half-sister-says-meghan-markle-has-narcissistic-personality-disorder/
Lol all of this ..... it’s so true makes me sick
Because they are kids they are supposed to be outside
Preach 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
One question…isn’t it a balancing act though? Doesn’t the threat of the IPPS throw a wrench into all that scheming? Doesn’t’t it make the scheming more difficult?
For me, just the way they speak to me is repulsive.
This is my best fucking video to date💕💙💕
Hey its MY video, you rascal!
I stand corrected .👌🏾
@@hgtudor-theultra I'm glad you like to tease people. It makes you seem more human. You may argue that narcs ARE human. Another narc self- professed narcissist says they are androids.
@@hgtudor-theultra
😀
Not adapting to sleeping paralizis
Yes- I remember this - remember it well- now gone into the grave with her
LMAO...”telling another fucking lie.” Isn’t that the truth!
What if she is messing around from a distance in spite of the nocontact, ???
Now, let me guess...because it's such fun???!!! 😈
Sorry not Sorry.
'The wolf of wall street'
HG what about the claims that narcissists look for a motherfigure in their so-called significant other? The claim that women are either viewed as mothers or whores.. If these are true what kind of traits does a narcissist want to ’morph’ into their own? Do they only want to take on the traits of a ’good’, ’well-behaved’, ’humble’ woman (aka the motherfigure) since they will be the only ones who will be able to become a potential partner/spouse?
This is sooooo true I was his mother , I had to “mind him” he would even say things like I’ve abandon him , as if he was a child , and his voice would turn child like when he would ring me apologising ..... creepy
Excuses,Excuses,Excuses!
Have y'all ever heard " speak your face" From a narc?
So if u guys don't want to pay rent u need to give them allowance
If HG is indeed a narcissist, then how can he openly and easily acknowledge everything that narcissists are?
Because he is the best of his kind. His intelligence is beyond what we can understand and comprehend. His brain works completely in logic and sees clearly through everything with all emotion out of it. So hence he can study every action and reaction . His kind is the most dangerous and I have been with two this way and believe me when I say you have to be very emotionally strong to play the game.He is letting us know all of this because it does feed his narrative and gives him fuel in a sense. I assure you he does not do it for us in a way of helping. But I still thank him for all these videos.
Read his about section. He tells you why he does this.
@@tammy5926 Yes, he said he does not do it to help others. He said, "I hate everyone equally."
@@TexasGirl-Z71 it's a lucrative gig
It's easy because he remains anonymous and doesn't have to deal with the people he treats like this.
How about a life time !!
Thx , everyone & my marriage is not working !
We cried more in one year than the 30 plus years! THX everyone 4 the pain
Why care about these automatons? It's boring to hear the ramblings boast about the inflicted abuse. It's not telling you to help you...to cash in on your pain still. Think about it...and your thanking it🤷🤦
You are missing the point. HG is giving those of us who are or have been ensnared by a narcissist the insight needed to make sense out of our experience. It really sounds like you are looking at this from a vantage point of never been on the receiving end of a true narcissist or been entangled in a relationship with a narcissist. I too was ignorant of this situation till I got entangled romantically with a narcissist. Working through the trauma of an ordeal like this is why so many of us are listening to HG and trying to make a new path for ourselves. Unless you have been in this situation you are not likely to "get it" and I truly hope you never have to learn what we have been through.
HG Do you know of a female equivalent to you? I'd love to hear a female narcissist discuss their Confabulation. One day! Please DO NOT pitch-shift the audio; we'll know. p.s. would you be interested in a covert-narcissist who went to on to become a cult recruiter for educoworld?
Did you discard a previous channel? Your voice sounds slightly different now?
He led a gay double life. That’s why!
First