How To Set BOUNDARIES With Men...
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- Опубликовано: 2 июл 2024
- NEW SUMMER 2024
Ryan now offers self-guided online courses to help women of ANY age crush those single streets FASTER and more efficiently!
Check out his course offerings here: www.boyfriendblueprint.com/co...
In this video, dating coach Ryan Patrick puts out 5 action steps in how to set boundaries with men and why none of these steps should EVER be skipped.
These should be rules for life - Set boundaries and stick with them. Never let anyone step too far or make you feel uncomfortable.
Find people that respect you. Respect your time and Respect your wants.
I have come to adore using boundaries. You will learn so much and very quickly about a person by the way they respond to your boundaries.
Dating is hard. I had one guy try go to far 1st date, told him my boundaries, and he argued with me and put me down. Ugh.. some just don't have any respect.
Yep. Man-boys today are so entitled. Tell them no, pay the price. Most are like overgrown toddlers. 👩🦲We do all the work it seems. They've gotten away w so much as women made too easy, too long. They can swipe left if u dare disagree....internet ruined dating.
The instant that happens next time, make a deal with me right now: get up from the table and WALK AWAY. Deal? 🤝
Same! After a third date, I still wasn't ready to go further than kissing. He completely turned, got upset and tried to tell ME, that I had issues. It's rough out there...
@@datingcoachryanpatrick deal... I'll just walk away.
@@Julia-jb7nf I would of yes I do have issues and I am looking at it..good bye
This is SO GOOD, Ryan!! I’m *terrible* at setting and sticking to boundaries but getting better. Unfortunately, I think many guys see boundaries (especially no-sex) as a challenge. “Oh, really? Let’s find a sneaky way to talk you into just the opposite.” I’m doing the work though. My most important boundary? Honest and open consistent communication. I don’t need to be up a guy’s hiney, but if you’re busy or have an issue TALK about it instead of ignoring the problem or breadcrumbing or ghosting. Why? I was often humiliated or ignored when I tried to talk with my mom as a kid. I’m not needy - but I have legitimate reasons for not wanting to be made to feel like “you don’t matter.” I LOVE that you ask us to identify WHY each boundary is important. Eye-opening. These are great tools and reminders. Keep up the good and important work! 💕
Regardless of your sex, you need to be doing the work to figure out your own boundaries first, the boundaries of who you are, your character and values, and how you want to be treated. When you have a solid foundation on this, no one gets to hold the power to take it from you. But if you’re too thirsty for love, you drink toxic water.
Ive set my boundaries on the 2nd date, telling and asking him what not to do (things I don't like) from the last date recap.
Ladies! Communication and valuing yourself more than you take for is really important
I would like to see more videos like this, I find men are always pushing boundaries especially with the texting Do they really need constant reminders on how to be respectful ,
Glad you like this topic, Lisa. Noted 😉
Wow I’ve noticed men who have success(es) or especially “affluent” supposedly (Bc idk if he’s lying yet) ... is this a red flag? I know men get competitive and wanna show off but how much is too much?
Thank you for clarifying boundaries and how to handle. Sometimes, an explanation is needed. I feel better about the last situation I was in.
My pleasure, Carolyn 👌
Really liked, when you said don't sacrifice especially for him. I was thinking of spending my weekend with my boyfriend, instead of family. Now I know it is not necessary to sacrifice the things you love :)
You don’t have to sacrifice - Everything is about balance. You spend time with him on a weekend, you spend time with them on a weekend. It doesn’t have to be exclusively 1 or the other :)
@@PeoplePleaser578 thanks 🙏
Learned this the hard way after being divorced from an 18-year marriage, started dating & got into situations where men ignored my boundaries.
Now I just flat-out tell 'em before we even have a first date. Sure did change the dating pool from dozens to ...one maybe once in a while, but it weeds out the perverts, so what, better to be alone than be a blow-up doll. I've started making mental bets with myself as to how long it takes for the guy to disappear, it's almost funny.
Well said! Couldn't agree with you more!
Ha ha wcm back …it.s not funny..it.s kinda sad after awhile …….
Dating is hard when you invest a time to it .you do all the effort but if you feel that its wasting your time. Then you must step forward and never sacrifice just for him.
thank you this video came right when I needed it! learning how to implement boundaries in your 30s bc your parents never taught you how to have them is hard but so important 😩
Wow this was so very helpful for me. I’ve been married for 30 years and now in the dating world and things have changed since the 80s. I have felt like the expectations from men where out of my own standards and there were no such thing as boundaries. Love learning stuff like this. Thanks Ryan!
Wish this video existed last year before I started dating my toxic, abusive and manipulative ex. Thank you for sharing this 💜
Thank you for this video; boundaries are quite a hurdle for me. Sometimes, you don't know you have boundaries until they've been crossed and it takes some work to be able to put them into words for someone else to understand.
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So true! I think for some of us who grew up without autonomy over our person it can be very hard to know what our boundaries are and even harder to be upfront and vocal about them instead of being in the moment and disassociating. It’s like time slows down while you’re swimming underwater, and when you come up for air time jumps back forward and you think “that’s not what I wanted at all.”
I've been watching your videos for a while and as a result I feel more confident and sure of what I want and need. Thank you so much :)
love this video!! i have hold on to my convictions and beliefs and boundaries especially this year and my last boyfriend i noticed just pretended to listened to it but then i noticed that he didn't really had any respect for me or what i said and then he got dumped !! i won't stand for any disrespect!!
Olivia’s in the house! 🙌 How’ve you been? 😀
@@datingcoachryanpatrick i'm Good thank you!! 😄 I am focusing in work right now and i just found out that i am going to be an aunt for the second time so i am very exited ☀️👶🏽
Good stuff. Glad you’re back.
Ryan that was a great video. Thank you for helping me through my dating journey.
I wish I had better boundaries in current relationship. He keeps pushing my boundaries and I have to keep asserting them. It is exhausting.
Be careful ☹️ guys like that usually won’t change. My ex used to do that. He rubbed it in my face once “you draw a line, and I keep doing my best to jump over it hahaha.” And ultimately he cheated and left. It wasn’t until I’ve started seeing a man who’s been my friend first, that I realized how men act when they value who you are to them. He has not pushed me, he has actually asked if we could talk when he noticed something bothering me, he has asked if I’m comfortable. Just be careful not to wear yourself down on a guy that’s actually trying to wear you down.
If he doesn’t step off and start listening up, it’s a big ol’ NEXT! 👉👉👉
Its never too late to up your standards and boundaries in all your relationships, a relationships should feel just right, easy. Not exhausting at all.
That is a red flag! Ryan says NEXT and I agree! They WILL NOT change, because they don't care and don't value how special you are. Find someone else who will and respects your boundaries. You deserve better, sis.
Thank you so MUCH for this video!
Love that you are coaching from Spain! And you seem so much more comfortable and relaxed- so i can focus more on your wisdom! I learned more and it’s a good reminder to lay the foundation with the correct material. Boundaries we set are so important and this message came at an opportune time! Thanks 🙏
Or they leave when they don’t get their way…. But that is ok with me lol!
Your advices are always on point. You have the best approach about dating. I wish I had a coach like you before jumping into the worst relationship I just came out from. As soon as I start dating again, or being ready to do so, I’ll register to your classes.
you always have the best advice!
You have me wondering, if Its not so much a boundary, as a tolerance level! When it comes to a person's behavior, Its true that its the little things that can make or break a relationship. Don't do anything you don't feel good about. Set boundaries for yourself. Good advise.
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Thank you so much, watching from Uganda.❤️
Thanks for your insight, Ryan 😎! It is much appreciated!
Word up, Erin! ✌️
Ryan you're awesome. Thank you for your great advice!
Many thanks Ryan 🙏👏👏
Really helpful 👌👌😍
Do you have a video with suggested boundaries that I can/should set? I’m a new sub. Just found you. Amazing advice. Thank you!
Excellent content, as always, Ryan! ¡Viva España!
Thanks Mo! 🇪🇸🇪🇸
Thanks Ryan! ❤ Love your content! Thank you for still making videos while on vacation 🙌 hope you're having a great time in Spain! So jealous! Haha 😜
Traveling and working, really, but we get vacation-like breaks indeed 😜
@@datingcoachryanpatrick any time off is welcome, I'm sure 😅😁
Loved this Ryan!
Wonderful NK 😄
Ty for this lil bro ,great timing ❤️
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Boundaries was why I'm divorced. I kept reminding him of my boundaries, so he felt I was being toxic, so he filed for divorce. Yeah ok whatever validates his behavior. Now that I'm back into the dating pool age appropriate men are after the barely legal. Even though I'm 40, I look 20, but the number on my profile keeps suitors away. Also straight away the ones that do contact me are either scammers or want nudes right away.
Brilliant u are so awesome at what you do - you’d actually make a great actor too u have amazing presence
Just a man here to take notes.
Appreciate the advice ❤but why are we always learning, trying, etc. No matter what we do is wrong & most don't like strong women😊😎💪. But so true ladies...Just Leave & Show Consequences.
It’s wrong to the wrong guy. It took me a long time to get that. The right guy won’t have a problem with it and won’t say that you’re wrong for how you feel. He will listen.
This isn’t for anybody other than yourself, if you personally feel you need stronger boundaries. Don’t jump through these hoops for men, specifically. It’s all about YOU 👍
@@datingcoachryanpatrick Makes sense 😊thanks. I stopped jumping thru hoops 15 yrs ago. Thanks for your time & advice 💚❤👋
Thank you for your insights on the boundaries matter. This is what I’m going through right now… it’s tough and challenging at the same time.
I cam really relate on this now. And im gonna follow all the advice. Thanks Ryan, i need a sign and it lead me to this video of yours.
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God bless you Ryan
🙏🙏
I love watching you.
You deserve more subscribers. I love all of your content and its very helpful im sure same with others. Thank you so much!
I know of a man| who can heIp you bring your ex back permanent within 2days without delay
Wh'tsapp him for heIp
✛𝟮𝟯𝟰8139934468(☉｡☉)!
✛𝟮𝟯𝟰8139934468(☉｡☉)! it really worked I can't believe am with my love again after so many years of break up
@@julietdifference1153 sorry i dont want my ex back
I would love to see a video on types of connections! 🙏🏼
I seem to be constantly struggling to find the right kind of connection! I meet one person where after a few months there is a physical connection but no emotional intimacy or intellectual connection and the next person there is an intellectual connection but no physical or emotional and my long term partner previously I had the emotional intimacy but no physical or intellectual connection! Is it ever possible to have more than one type of connection or do I have to settle for unfulfilment? Am I picking the wrong people for me or is a couple of months not long enough to establish a connection? I’m feeling quite lost with it all!
Noted Sara, thanks for the suggestion! This would be a fun, insightful video to make 🙏
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Sara Lou…story of my life and relationships! I refuse to settle for anything less than a total package, so I prefer to stay single until I find what I need. It’s hard and I’m lonely, but at least I’m not miserable 😉
Ahh I wish this video came out when I first started dating this guy and now I'm in massive limbo about him
Yessss please
Ryan, can you please do a video about creepy behaviors and creepy men? Or at least clingy/red flags that we can spot on when talking face to face with a guy.
I asked this because as a college student, I get approached by many guys on campus daily. We have lunch or coffee together for once, but after that, I figure the guys typically move on too fast. That means they would want to see me more often, and would text me every now and then. WORSE, THEY WOULD ASK ME TO GO OVER THEIR PLACE after some time. I need to know the early signs of clingy/needy/creepy behaviors so I can save myself some time. I'm truly appreciated your help, time, and great humor.
Great content! Thank you! How do you set a clear boundary when you’re not interested in someone you regularly interact with socially? Is it possible to be pleasant, friendly and polite without sending the wrong message and leaving him with the impression that he might still have a shot in the future if he just keeps trying harder?
Looks like your values with him don't match with what's he's looking for
Dude is in Spain ! Come to Paris, it's nice as well and you're not far :p
Ryan got so tan!!!
Indeed Keyawna! Great to see you in the thread 😎
Man do not respect for boundaries they just leave you and move on
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Let them move on. The main reason why men have no respect for boundaries because most women have no standards. Therefore, a lot men can just simply move on to the next one. That is okay too because who needs the nonsense?
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
i have a question about this - a guy i like and have some hooking up history with straight up never texted me back when i asked him to hangout. a couple days later i sent him a text basically laying down the boundary that i didnt appreciate that and that i would like to get to know him more than hookups but anything else to leave me out of it. he immediately texted me back 7 texts kinda with a lame excuse but that he shouldn’t have done that to me and asked if i really hate him now. i have not responded to that yet. i don’t hate him but i do mean business so idk from here go with that approach. like he still has a chance but he fucked uo and will have to earn it now. any guidance? thanks
Men are very, very inflexible so it is very hard to set boundaries. Especially older men that have been in long term relstionship
If a guy is SERIOUS about you, then he'll make the change to keep you. No excuses. You deserve someone who will respect your boundaries and not force you to do something against your will.
If you regard your own limits as a bargaining chip - so will a man. When you understand you have set “Non negotiables” that IS what they are. You have set them in place to protect you, not to be bandied about like an object at an auction. NO means NO. And not just to a man. To anyone.
I dated a guy for over a year and whenever I'd not put up with the crap he gave me he would say "I'm sorry you got offended, what I did was totally normal but you have a problem with it". I let him gaslight me and convince me that I was the a-hole for being so strict... Big mistake. It ended in shambles
I have problems with a guy who's getting angry with me because I set boundaries and he's been sexually harassing me when I told him over and over I'm not interested. Any advice?
Tell him to stop contacting you or the police will probably love to get to know him 👌
@@datingcoachryanpatrick Lol
@@datingcoachryanpatrick I have mentioned reporting him to the police but he doesn't care. It's a male friend of mine who wants to be more than friends but I don't feel the same way. But I feel like what he's doing is sexual harassment. This is why I'm single. I don't trust men.
@@monikavarro2020 I would call the cops in his presence, get a restraining order.
@@saffiyahfleary94 I would be afraid what he would do if I did that. He's quite an angry man. He has major anger issues. Don't think the police could protect me from a maniac like that.
I grew up in Asian culture and maybe it's just me, laying down boundaries is so not a female thing to do. How do i lay down a boundary when this guy ignores my messages i send and not feel like i am being too demanding or needy? Little background, we are LDR and he has recently said he wanted to step back because LDR during a pandemic is tiring for me it seems. I am not buying that though he has reiterated this everytime i confront him. Am i being too needy?
Are you still on Wisio? Sent a request.
Yes I am 👍
What if I lose him with these boundaries ?
Then he was never good enough in the first place 👍
@@datingcoachryanpatrick Well said Ryan keep up the good work. Love your videos what you always say always make sense. Love from the UK. ❤️🙏👍
Sexing isn’t my thing and he knows that and we are still together because he really really likes me. Which is great for me because I really really like him too.
I know of a man| who can heIp you bring your ex back permanent within 2days without delay
Wh'tsapp him for heIp
✛𝟮𝟯𝟰8139934468(☉｡☉)!
✛𝟮𝟯𝟰8139934468(☉｡☉)! it really worked I can't believe am with my love again after so many years of break up
@@julietdifference1153 I am happy with who I am with now
Another Awesome show!
Left my 20 yrs of mariatal nightmare beyond mental an physical abuse of 20 years
marriage
Moved 3 hours away
Still stalks me
M
Have had know over zero care wanted to see date a man
But now I feel stronger being independed except understand after cousling I have learned in can an enjoy me alone ti.e!
I cant live in fear i have learned to just live life an
So happy I am freeeeeee
Mt question is?
How to learn know???
Avoid a possible controling
NEGTIVE unkind ?
I am very on guard
Any tips how to spot BEHAVOR wen just newly stating to careful date after 20 yrs
I been threw much horrible abused I do not hate men I know there are truly good out there just scared
Deann, take time to know yourself. Unwind. You learn to honor your limits. You place them there to protect you. You’ll get a gut reaction when you feel unsafe. You might actually feel it right in your belly. Or you might tell yourself, “Something’s not right...” Learn to listen. Protect yourself.
Need a ❤️ button
I love that idea! 😍
Have you taken a tattoo? What does it say :)?
‼️💕💖💃
Just going to put it out there, that it’s uncomfortable to watch someone being uncomfortable, so Ryan…get out of the sun, boo 😂we love ya just as much sitting somewhere comfy ❤️
It was certainly warm that day lol but that initial redness will turn to a nice Mediterranean golden tan in 48 hours usually 😅
@@datingcoachryanpatrick Oh I was talking about the squinting
I nip it in the bud when a guy crossed my boundaries. Someone having a mental health issue is not an excuse to be disrespected as a woman. I'm not afraid to lose a guy and yes thank you for stressing enough for ladies to be their own advocate and be assertive in a kind way! Enjoy your trip Ryan, stay safe 😘
@@mariaupton8429 Yes, exactly! No excuses!
I'm tired of dating men
Why are you glitching out? The editing is just weird!
My style isn’t for everyone, friend.