Feel Them Pulling Away? - AVOID THIS MISTAKE!

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  • Опубликовано: 21 сен 2024

Комментарии • 2 тыс.

  • @AaronDoughty44
    @AaronDoughty44  Год назад +169

    2023 is the year for you to completely upgrade your vibration! see how here! ➡ whatsmyvibration.com/

    • @crusoebower3391
      @crusoebower3391 Год назад +8

      Cheers brother I just got out of jail and lost my partner. You are a real blessing thankyou

    • @joanne5275
      @joanne5275 Год назад +1

      Please get the superheart on the top bar so people can give. There's a video showing how to do it if you don't know how. Thnx

    • @airakhan7979
      @airakhan7979 Год назад +1

      Thrs a man asking me to whtsapp him if want to manifest anythg i want. i thgt it you who recommended. So out of curiosity i texted him. He s frm Nigeria. Seems like a scam. Please be alert of this!

    • @crusoebower3391
      @crusoebower3391 Год назад

      @@airakhan7979 yeah it's pretty obvious hey

    • @airakhan7979
      @airakhan7979 Год назад

      @@crusoebower3391 ya.

  • @breezepeace531
    @breezepeace531 Год назад +1923

    “Don’t afraid of losing someone, afraid of losing yourself.”

    • @siaitsme6800
      @siaitsme6800 8 месяцев назад +11

      Exactly 💯 💯 🎯

    • @Freestylebender101
      @Freestylebender101 4 месяца назад +4

      Real talk ever listen after ages 🔥

    • @marguskiis7711
      @marguskiis7711 4 месяца назад +3

      Finally you remain totally alone. Simple.

    • @the-stoic-insights-1
      @the-stoic-insights-1 2 месяца назад +3

      The more women expect from you, the more you need to manage those expectations. However, your time, energy, and money are finite resources that can't be given out freely. Therefore, mastering the art of saying "no" to women is crucial.

    • @Selflove1970
      @Selflove1970 2 месяца назад

      Well I'm a year late now I'm finding my way back home to me!

  • @lerak8452
    @lerak8452 Год назад +5808

    It's such a pathetic game people play. Relationships shouldn't be difficult but people make them. If you're too nice, if you're too mean. If you give too much attention. If you don't give enough attention. If you're close. If you're distant. It's like Goldie Locks. So sad what people have come too.

    • @lou15176
      @lou15176 Год назад +396

      I agree ☝️ society has over complicated one of the most natural things. Humans meeting, bonding and interacting with each other. Sounds so easy, feels so difficult (at times) x

    • @Aman-nk5uq
      @Aman-nk5uq Год назад +190

      Agreed. It's pathetic to be honest

    • @exoticindiaa
      @exoticindiaa Год назад +27

      This ❤

    • @jonchapman8344
      @jonchapman8344 Год назад +123

      True. Im an honest man but being honest women say im being dramatic. So you want me to lie. 😅

    • @kaponde2196
      @kaponde2196 Год назад +21

      I agree

  • @rosemarybgallet
    @rosemarybgallet 4 месяца назад +806

    When a person ignores you, they are teaching you how to live without them.

    • @alexiaajamian5236
      @alexiaajamian5236 3 месяца назад +1

      Very nice thank you

    • @sirtype-alot3391
      @sirtype-alot3391 3 месяца назад +13

      I have a feeling that's what my GF is trying to do. I video called her on my break at work abd she didn't answer...abd she also didn't even text me a goodnight. When I called her out on it she replied.."You'll Survive" lol

    • @YtulaLama
      @YtulaLama 3 месяца назад +1

      I know it's quite cringey but I am your 200th like 😂.. congratulations 🎉

    • @cheerubebayonettaholopaine2638
      @cheerubebayonettaholopaine2638 3 месяца назад +1

      i heard this quote like 15 years ago... and its so true. so damn true...

    • @Bashteo
      @Bashteo 2 месяца назад

      @@sirtype-alot3391well truth be told good morning and goodnight text aren’t needed, Maybe every now and then. But definitely not in the beginning of the relationship

  • @aditamamukti9650
    @aditamamukti9650 3 месяца назад +126

    So its basically dont chase someone who doesnt value you, instead just sorround yourself with people who appreciate, need you and make you feel worthy because of that value you have.

  • @jrcapix369
    @jrcapix369 Год назад +233

    I would usually say before i sleep " I'm claiming back my energy now, from other people, places and situations I gave my attention to, I am now complete"

  • @sophiedavidson1579
    @sophiedavidson1579 Год назад +3128

    - Bring the ENERGY back to yourself, stop focusing on them
    - Give them space
    - Don’t seek external validation
    - Just let go, if they don’t choose you
    - It’s their stuff, not yours
    - Stop abandoning yourself

  • @robert4you
    @robert4you Год назад +943

    The quickest way to get someone's attention is to remove yours. I do not chase, I attract. What belongs to me will come to me without hardship and without pain. What I attract will stay with me. Always pursue, but do it in a frame of being cool, calm and collected. Never ever chase! Never! Avoid desperation, just patiently wait for results. She already knows how you feel, she's not going anywhere, relax.

    • @rogersyme1368
      @rogersyme1368 Год назад +14

      Great advice!

    • @Prince_Unknown1
      @Prince_Unknown1 11 месяцев назад +4

      What if its your wife and she's seperated and at her mother's place and you have 2 lil kids with her? You can't stop contacting her because of the kids...I wish I could not contact her but I love my kids so much and always have to know how they are

    • @robert4you
      @robert4you 11 месяцев назад +13

      @@Prince_Unknown1 When kids are involved, a former wife, the economy etc... the situation is of course different compared to the courting stage. My comment was aimed for the stage before it turns into a full fledged relationship, kids, a house, car payments, house loans, a joint economy and everything else. In this circumstance you must have contact to fix all these things. But even then, as soon as possible detach from your ex and heal, heal, heal....

    • @Prince_Unknown1
      @Prince_Unknown1 11 месяцев назад +2

      @@robert4you thanks

    • @robert4you
      @robert4you 11 месяцев назад +4

      @@Prince_Unknown1 Good luck and always remember to stay calm and collected, even if you are provoked or irritated by your former wife. Calmness will get you so much farther and solve things for the better compared to constant anger, fury, etc...

  • @sisimmonds1472
    @sisimmonds1472 Год назад +834

    "Are you choosing people who are not choosing you"
    that's DEEP 👌🏾

  • @aanandrajpara8584
    @aanandrajpara8584 Месяц назад +1253

    there's a book called whispers of manifestation on borlest , and it talks about how using some secret tehniques you can attract almost everything in life it's not some bullshit law of attraction, it's the real deal

  • @T-KRD
    @T-KRD Год назад +525

    "Stop abandoning yourself", that's powerful, thank you

    • @JAHCUBAN
      @JAHCUBAN 8 месяцев назад

      10:20

    • @bocahpetualang89
      @bocahpetualang89 8 месяцев назад

      can you explain "Stop abandoning yourself" in the other meaning? becuz english is not my mother tounge..

    • @serenitygilles7064
      @serenitygilles7064 4 месяца назад

      YES!

  • @sayless1445
    @sayless1445 Год назад +378

    You pull away! I pull away! Simple! No chase here✌🏾✌🏾

  • @johnreyorenday2316
    @johnreyorenday2316 Год назад +400

    "and as you start choosing yourself, you then make a space for someone that can actually choose you"

    • @FredrikAntonsen
      @FredrikAntonsen 5 месяцев назад

      ❤❤❤

    • @FredrikAntonsen
      @FredrikAntonsen 5 месяцев назад +1

      Do you have a tip jar? ❤️❤️❤️Because you are serving! 🥰🥰🥰

    • @yckss17
      @yckss17 4 месяца назад

      the one choosing me is fat ugly...
      what should i do?

  • @northshorelight35
    @northshorelight35 Год назад +347

    If they're pulling away, I'll let them go. I don't have the energy to do anything about it. If they come back I'm going to say "no". I don't have time for mind games. I want to be with someone who is consistent. Been married for over 20 years.

    • @rs5570
      @rs5570 Год назад +37

      Yes. Doing that will wear you out, eat you alive and use you up. Let them GO and as you said don’t take them back. If you take them back they will put you through it again.

    • @mOOniverse1111
      @mOOniverse1111 4 месяца назад +1

      Smart! Why bother chasing, pulling. All this energy can be used on yourself!

    • @shedagirl1726
      @shedagirl1726 2 месяца назад

      Going through this now, im not chasing!

  • @tigerexo6577
    @tigerexo6577 Год назад +127

    Choose yourself. Choose people who choose you.

    • @gh1214
      @gh1214 24 дня назад +2

      Wrong…choose each other

  • @hollygrapher7574
    @hollygrapher7574 Год назад +95

    Ive struggled with relationships and now i prefer to be alone solitude is better than toxicity

    • @Wizard-Girl9
      @Wizard-Girl9 Месяц назад

      Unless you have nothing to give

  • @Nike.Crystalia
    @Nike.Crystalia Год назад +633

    Chose people who chose you, if they wanna go the door is open, they wanna stay and they show them worth the we give a chance🧘🏻‍♀️🕯️✨💕 this is my energy right now🧬

  • @myles2168
    @myles2168 Год назад +597

    I was unwanted and abused as a kid. You hit the nail on the head....when I'm left feeling unwanted in this adult life, it reminds me of being young.

    • @BellaStarr8737
      @BellaStarr8737 Год назад +41

      I'm so sorry you were made to feel that way. Especially being as young as a child. Those feelings are so confusing... Even as an adult now. I hope things are getting better for you.

    • @AS-on1fz
      @AS-on1fz Год назад +19

      Mee too, it really sucks.

    • @myles2168
      @myles2168 Год назад +23

      @@BellaStarr8737 bless your heart....I honestly think the damage has been done,but what I do know is make the most of what and who you have in your life,and I'm grateful for all the good people that surround me. I've just started listening to people like Aaron,and I can truly say that it has helped me quite a bit 💜

    • @adedot7
      @adedot7 Год назад +23

      I know exactly what you mean. I had abandonment issue as a child. For about 4 years now, I've been learning to let go of my past, forgiving my parents, everybody in my past and myself. This has helped me with my self esteem and being able to walk away from people and things that don't serve me because I was addicted to toxic people and situations; not anymore.

    • @generationalcursebreaker5397
      @generationalcursebreaker5397 Год назад +3

      Me too

  • @ATREASUREOFGOLD
    @ATREASUREOFGOLD Год назад +114

    “ it’s just fighting to avoid abandonment” … ouch… so true

  • @susanlovesjava4961
    @susanlovesjava4961 27 дней назад +8

    Amazing how this wasn't a problem until texting became the dominant form of communication.

  • @Remember-Death
    @Remember-Death Год назад +44

    "I'm not good enough, people don't choose me."
    Man, that struck a nerve in my soul. That sentence encapsulates so much of my younger years.

  • @LL-ki9em
    @LL-ki9em Год назад +62

    If someone doesn’t want you just walk away. Cry. Heart pain just do whatever u want to grieve. Then time will heal us. Dun chase for someone who doesn’t belong to you.

  • @86Kera
    @86Kera Год назад +214

    But you have to keep in mind that they may end up not missing you but at least you no longer have to put that energy into something that will end up draining you. You do feel a shift in a person’s energy towards you. Everything mentioned makes so much sense.

    • @naimasophie
      @naimasophie 2 месяца назад +9

      They usually don't miss you. People pull back for a reason

    • @nsd594
      @nsd594 2 месяца назад

      True...mine didn't miss me..coz he was already cheating ​@@naimasophie

  • @stayhappylittlemermaid
    @stayhappylittlemermaid Год назад +180

    Even in your darkest moments, you are feeling something. If you're not feeling, you're simply just existing, and that isn't what living should be about.

    • @Lexmycity
      @Lexmycity Год назад +1

      Realest thing to remember

    • @jeoe88
      @jeoe88 Год назад

      Great ! When i say i fear death because i fear no existing i rather even hell ‘cause that way i still exist ,
      I got to deatach from that fear , embrace the nothing “Osho “ would say

    • @tagunprice9762
      @tagunprice9762 Год назад

      @@jeoe88 That's interesting because I'm the opposite. The idea of hell or even eternity in general freaks me out so bad. But if I knew that I would just stop existing after I die I would be relieved. Because if you don't exist then you can't feel pain, or boredom, or anything.

  • @kimberlygillis9074
    @kimberlygillis9074 9 месяцев назад +18

    This is so true. You can actually feel them pulling away from you even when you are not in their presence.

  • @gricel8402
    @gricel8402 Год назад +29

    Guys, if someone you are truly being kind, loving , caring and open to in a healthy manner and they take this as you being " too much" . This individual is not your person. They are not for you. Move on.

    • @YotaQuebill
      @YotaQuebill День назад

      and when we move on and focus on our growth that person comeback out of the blue and feeling that they lose you, if that happen and you still want them, make a deal/boundaries if not this gonna be a repetitive cycle

  • @NiceTry469
    @NiceTry469 Год назад +441

    Let me share with you my experience with this because it works, but only in certain ways. Let them miss you, do no contact, all those good things. But the MOST IMPORTANT THING. Work on the things YOU have issues with. Put work and time into yourself so intentionally that you literally start to become the version of yourself you always were supposed to be. They can miss you and may want to eventually come back, but ultimately if you put no effort into yourself and your own shortcomings with YOURSELF, you will not be able to fix the relationship

    • @jessicarowling
      @jessicarowling Год назад +7

      This im doing and will get my shortcomings sorted in JESUS NAME

    • @Caolan-b6r
      @Caolan-b6r 11 месяцев назад +5

      I've done that and I'm a different person and became a far better man but doesn't seem like she'll ever give me a second chance. Life just seems empty without her

    • @Prince_Unknown1
      @Prince_Unknown1 11 месяцев назад +4

      What if its your wife and she's seperated and at her mother's place and you have kids with her? You can't stop contacting her because of the kids...I wish I could not contact her but I love my kids and always have to know how they are

    • @blackpantherandfamily4793
      @blackpantherandfamily4793 11 месяцев назад +2

      ​@@Prince_Unknown1Pray for you brother tough times, cant believe time is changing and she is not with me now. I will try this if its gonna work but im gonna work abroad in october 18, and i wanna see her for one last time before i live,

    • @rosearered17
      @rosearered17 11 месяцев назад

      i agree to this

  • @elyksteeley1181
    @elyksteeley1181 Год назад +134

    Just recently realized this with a girl I've liked. Started getting self conscious and nervous. "I have to make sure this works with her, don't mess this up" constantly walking on eggshells to make sure I don't make myself look like a fool around her. This extreme self consciousness was ultimately doing more damage than helping, and I ended up having a wonderful epiphany the other night: If I can't just be comfortable and be myself with this girl then this is never going to work, and even more so, she won't feel comfortable with me either. And even more so, maybe she and I just aren't a match after all. That was such a moment of clarity for me and things are so much better now. Just. Let. Go. If it doesn't work out with whoever you like, then it wasn't meant to be.

  • @Docandballtorture7756
    @Docandballtorture7756 Год назад +100

    My girlfriend actually called me out on this behavior, but what was special about her is that she didn't leave me or call me pathetic, needy, or a loser she understood why I'm this way (she's getting a degree in psychology) and helped me through it. Now I'm a lot better about this and feel way better

  • @aritrachakraborty251
    @aritrachakraborty251 Год назад +64

    Man this worked like magic. I understood the concept of giving and having space for myself. And after one month that person started a conversation with me and fixed everything herself. Thanks Aaron.😊

    • @jo-annenordin7032
      @jo-annenordin7032 7 месяцев назад +6

      So glad everything work out good for you may you guys still be happy

  • @KienTo-gn2jq
    @KienTo-gn2jq Месяц назад +4

    The moment he said "if your parents weren't there, it's NOT YOUR fault!" , my tears ricocheted, i felt a sudden relief from my heart.

  • @rage0in0the0cage
    @rage0in0the0cage Год назад +47

    The only person you should always be 100% available to is yourself.
    Take care of yourself first and foremost, everyone is expendable.

    • @Ella-te7fe
      @Ella-te7fe Месяц назад +1

      Word!

    • @annehedonia156
      @annehedonia156 15 дней назад

      Um, no. Parents of children can't do this, wtf. Everyone is expendable is a sociopathic stance.

    • @rage0in0the0cage
      @rage0in0the0cage 15 дней назад

      @@annehedonia156, my parents did, so did many other parents neglect and abuse their kids.
      There's nothing "sociopathic" about severing ties with toxic people, be they family or otherwise.

  • @dessi88
    @dessi88 Год назад +294

    I was doing that mistake. I wasn't pursuing him physically but I was doing it energetically :( now I'm learning how to go back to my feminine energy ☯️

    • @lolelyn1
      @lolelyn1 Год назад +22

      Same 😓. Eventhough I didn't text him, I was always thinking about why he hasn't texted yet eventhough he said he will and it turned out he didn't write at all.. Now I feel kinda pissed and mad about the whole situation what makes me let the whole situation and my attachment go so much easier.. I think letting go is also a lot about being real to yourself and feel emotions.. i think it's an act of selflove and selfworth to be sad or angry about things.. the problem is I tend to forbid myself to feel them and that makes it even harder..

    • @judydavenport9698
      @judydavenport9698 Год назад +4

      How do you go back to your feminine energy

    • @DO-ez7mz
      @DO-ez7mz Год назад +1

      And?

    • @theworldisimmense
      @theworldisimmense Год назад

      @@lolelyn1 I got a little story from a girl at the gym , lmk maybe you can give some advice

    • @rs5570
      @rs5570 Год назад +1

      Yes. Don’t even think about them. If you do, they will feel it.

  • @mbha.ngubane
    @mbha.ngubane Год назад +16

    It all comes down to the law of supply and demand. The more love and attention you give to someone, the less valuable the response or reaction you will receive back

  • @EMBL2011
    @EMBL2011 3 месяца назад +4

    "As you're choosing yourself you're making space for someone who can actually choose you". Good point.

  • @donsdesignideas6952
    @donsdesignideas6952 3 месяца назад +19

    I have no more energy to save friendships or relationships, if you want to go then just go.

  • @edleer11
    @edleer11 Год назад +82

    “It wasn’t your fault” - that hit me.

    • @serenitygilles7064
      @serenitygilles7064 4 месяца назад +3

      every time I hear the part I feel like crying...every time . BIG HUGS

    • @celemax4692
      @celemax4692 4 месяца назад +2

      I understood so many things when he said that. Childhood trauma unresolved. Almost started crying.

    • @ontariohiddenpearls
      @ontariohiddenpearls 3 месяца назад +1

      Reminded me of Goodwill Hunting!!!

  • @anushreekm8507
    @anushreekm8507 Год назад +118

    Maturity is when you realize ur self worth and move on. Cause you might have tried 100% to save ur love for them but still if u feel ignored or unloved by them, just step back and give importance to urself, be patient and let the right person recognize ur true love. All is well👍☺

    • @anushreekm8507
      @anushreekm8507 Год назад +7

      I had a one sided love. I truly loved him. But he said he had no such feelings over me. I can't take off my love for him. But I am trying. Hope one day I will become free from this. ☺

    • @brocklesnar3603
      @brocklesnar3603 Год назад +1

      ​@@anushreekm8507 have you moved on ??

    • @anushreekm8507
      @anushreekm8507 Год назад +1

      @@brocklesnar3603 I am trying day by day...u know it takes time

    • @brocklesnar3603
      @brocklesnar3603 Год назад

      @@anushreekm8507 same here , my crush is also ignoring me , it feels really sad

    • @anushreekm8507
      @anushreekm8507 Год назад +2

      @@brocklesnar3603 it's ok..it takes time..U don't expect ur crush to love u back...

  • @MrDSmith
    @MrDSmith Год назад +82

    I’m going through this right now. I’m choosing someone who isn’t choosing me, so I’m going to follow your advice and let them go.
    I absolutely act as you have outlined and this is a light switch moment of realization of how toxic and backwards my self-hate is from childhood abuse. I will fix myself for me so I can learn to love myself and stop abandoning my self-worth.

    • @Schmalzlocke123
      @Schmalzlocke123 Год назад +4

      How did it go for you ?

    • @abbz23
      @abbz23 Год назад +1

      Ikr same going through it too

  • @snapcracklepop360
    @snapcracklepop360 Год назад +89

    COMMUNICATION! It’s ultimately the key to everything. You can’t go by week after week staying silent with your partner. Express yourself on a daily basis before you meet someone and when you do find your person you will already be good at expressing your love and feelings with them. You will gain respect from your partner and they will know exactly how you feel about them and won’t have to assume anything that may be incorrect. My gf just broke up with me and I’ve already learned that was the main reason it happened. I didn’t express myself and my feelings of the future (even the things that bothered me) and so she assumed that I didn’t care enough about her to move forward with her. I was stuck in my own head and it got in the way and crumbled the relationship over time. Practice your love, become comfortable with it and you will find someone that enjoys you for who you are ❤

    • @ailyntan1539
      @ailyntan1539 Год назад +3

      I AGREE with you!COMMUNICATION is the ultimate key in everything!I feel sorry for what you’ve been through but I’m pretty sure you’ll gonna meet someone who is the perfect and right person for you!😊

    • @user-scorpiara
      @user-scorpiara Год назад +3

      I agree, no one should need validation from me because they won't play games.i love communication, honesty and clarity.this push pull thing is bollacks. If I have to pull away, they weren't worth it

    • @dat1tacoguy936
      @dat1tacoguy936 Год назад +3

      Love communication. Just wish I had found this video earlier this year

    • @BTinHD
      @BTinHD 11 месяцев назад +2

      I believe what he is saying here in the video is, yes, communicate, but from place whereby you're centred in yourself, not out of a place of insecurity. I too am going through what you're going through, but for slightly different reasons. Take care.

    • @madridejosryuchan
      @madridejosryuchan 11 месяцев назад +3

      This is exactly what I want to tell my partner. I wanted to be close to him and trying to but it feels like there's a thick wall between us that i cant break.. and then i get thought of as not supportive enough, or flirting with other guys (im not)..

  • @CPE1704TK5
    @CPE1704TK5 Год назад +12

    They feel uncomfortable because they are worried that you might ask them to take responsibility for their choices. Let’s make sure we all bend over backwards and give them all a perfect pain free existence since they made such an effort to protect our feelings!

  • @Cosmicsurfpro
    @Cosmicsurfpro Год назад +90

    If you want somebody so bad that you can't be happy without them don't think that you can't forget about them. Stay busy maybe smoke weed and don't let yourself think about them and within a month they are not that big of a deal 🤙✌️💪

  • @llkg9
    @llkg9 Год назад +14

    I gave my spouse space, and they filled it with everything but me. Now I'm counting the days til our youngest kid is grown and I leave.

  • @theinfinitevic9017
    @theinfinitevic9017 Год назад +18

    "I choose you".
    "I choose Myself".
    Feels great. Thanks, man.
    Also, "it's not your fault" was on point.
    Pure Gold, my Beautiful Brother.

  • @OPL-ou2uc
    @OPL-ou2uc Месяц назад +39

    With a heart full of joy i thank you Dr oluwaseun for restoring my relationship again with the chants, you're the only sincere one l've ever seen. He can help you also ❤🎉

    • @OPL-ou2uc
      @OPL-ou2uc Месяц назад

      He’s on Facebook…

  • @Mati2432PL
    @Mati2432PL Месяц назад +2

    I rarely comment anything on RUclips, but this time I just have to speak up. Seriously, there's A LOT of bullshit tutorials out there, how to behave, what to do, but none of them touches the core of the problem, which in this case is childhood trauma. I love how you have compassionate approach to this topic. "It's not your fault", that hit me hard. The magic happens, when you start to love yourself, and convince yourself that it is NOT your fault that you've been abandoned. Thank you Aaron, for this lifechanging video.

  • @leonramsay21
    @leonramsay21 2 месяца назад +5

    Even if they never come back i learnt something here.

  • @nishinesss
    @nishinesss Год назад +11

    Too helpful !! Value yourself, what is yours will come back to you, if it didn't it was never yours.. don't loose yourself..

  • @elisegray6962
    @elisegray6962 5 месяцев назад +7

    After a full month of one sided story, I decided to let go. I needed to hear that message today.

  • @iamanushreedey
    @iamanushreedey 9 дней назад +1

    And how powerful the words are, more power to everyone who is reading this, you should not be afraid of loosing anyone❤

  • @austin6041
    @austin6041 Год назад +157

    Been binge watching watching your videos and meditating and trying to re-balance my energy like crazy since me and my girlfriend have been in a breakup/break of sorts over the last week. Since the night we broke it off we haven’t talked and I feel honestly way more amazing than I did that day bc I’m genuinely trying to focus all of my codependent energy back to myself and I’m learning a lot about this. Still hasn’t deleted anything of us or changed any profile pics. I think genuine space is making her realize things. It is for me too. Not even sure how I FEEL anymore! Haha. But I’m moving forward day by day and that’s all that matters
    So thank you for your videos! I would be a MESS right now without you man. Thank YOU

    • @maryanngarcia3798
      @maryanngarcia3798 Год назад +1

      How are you now?

    • @villanellesdyke
      @villanellesdyke Год назад +1

      Curiously asking, how are you doing now?

    • @austin6041
      @austin6041 Год назад +10

      @@villanellesdyke I am doing alright. I was really upset because I found out she was lying and cheating on me towards the end of our relationship through friends of friends… and we actually have a class together at university. But, I’m dealing with it fine. I have no resentment towards her, and I don’t care to have her back in my life romantically. I’m solely focused on myself, all humans have flaws, and it’s harder on the self to harbor hatred, than it is to love and forgive. Remember that

    • @austin6041
      @austin6041 Год назад +2

      @@villanellesdyke I am still meditating daily and watching videos daily. All helps.

    • @villanellesdyke
      @villanellesdyke Год назад +4

      @@austin6041 oh wow im sorry for hearing this ending. And damn you got strength my friend! Definitely doing the right thing to shift your energy and attention back on yourself, im trying to do the same as well. So many people are on this journey with you!

  • @borrisdillan9783
    @borrisdillan9783 Год назад +7

    wow.. i cried... dude.. i need these words to slap on my face... "Let Go" is always hard on my part especially when you build this special feelings towards that person.. but what you said is true.. very true.. i just need this strength... i know my worth.. i believe someday i will the right person for me..

  • @giancarlojacobs9982
    @giancarlojacobs9982 Год назад +161

    My friend group was very distant towards me in 2022 (unless they needed /wanted something from me). I would try to engage with them one on one thinking if I performed random kind gestures for each of them that things would change, but they continued taking my presence for granted and prioritizing each other while ignoring me. I left the group in Fall 2022 and distanced myself from them for months, after which they began telling me how the group hasn't been the same without me, inviting me to parties (that i knew I'd be ignored at) , and asking when they (as a group) would see me again. They all separately invited me to a New Year's Eve party that I politely yet instantly declined. It's strange that when I stopped wanting their friendship they made genuine effort to get me back in their lives , but when I was actively in their lives they barely noticed (again unless I was providing something for them).

    • @nutellajizz9459
      @nutellajizz9459 Год назад +26

      glad you see ur worth 💛✨️

    • @LovelyMel99
      @LovelyMel99 Год назад +19

      It’s crazy but people take your presence for granted well done

    • @revealiam
      @revealiam Год назад +18

      Your body knows the correct energetic invite for you. Your people will show up as you continue to honor you. You are worthy!

    • @KevinMeehanWhistle
      @KevinMeehanWhistle Год назад

      Fuck them. You now see your worth!

    • @thirstonhowellthebird
      @thirstonhowellthebird Год назад +16

      @@LovelyMel99 I’m sorry that happened to you. It sounds like you might’ve been the scapegoat of the group. There are some groups that just like to ignore people and shun them because it makes them feel powerful. Something about you must make them feel “less than“ so they have to put you in your place when the reality is you’re just a good and kind soul who mirrored back more than likely all the things that they are not and that made them feel some kind of negative way and they responded by treating you how they felt. Good to move away from them. Sounds like they are jealous.

  • @dareumi_
    @dareumi_ 24 дня назад +1

    You're a savior. It is unfolding to me now. I understand now their pov, it is uncomfortable.

  • @Juliet-rh3vd
    @Juliet-rh3vd 2 месяца назад +39

    I was following the instructions of Dr Oluwaseun with hope and faith. Not up to three days later, my ex called me and we reconciled❤

  • @ilovesatla
    @ilovesatla Год назад +15

    I just made that mistake a while ago. The absurd part is that I knew that i'm doing a mistake but I was really desperate and needy, I'll gladly take a time machine now to fix things but this is not realistic. Instead I'll learn from my mistake to be a better man for the next time. Thank you Aaron, I really needed that video

  • @randyredman
    @randyredman Год назад +50

    And also like you’ve said in other videos when you’re doing this process you’re not doing it to get someone potentially back (manipulating situation) but doing it just for you to get “you” back 🎉❤

  • @Princessk8
    @Princessk8 Год назад +8

    This is some good stuff. It's important to remember that, as much as we want to, we can't make someone stay. We can't change the direction another person wants to go. The best thing to do is to accept that first, and then go from there depending on the situation. But it all comes down to being emotionally stable and finding happiness within yourself.

  • @FatimaFathi-lx3cv
    @FatimaFathi-lx3cv 3 месяца назад +5

    And I started crying when he said does that remind you of something 😃

  • @yourhealingjourney9824
    @yourhealingjourney9824 Год назад +56

    I'm in my own frame and honestly thanks you, Aaron. It has changed my life. Even if people haven't come back, I've learnt to gather myself and feel good about myself. That's what matters the most

  • @TwistedSisterK
    @TwistedSisterK Год назад +35

    Wow, this is all so true. I always give people physical space but had been sending healing thoughts / energy to my TF when feeling their sadness instead of focusing on myself first. Thank you so much for shining a light on this ego obstacle to overcome. You're definitely a lightworker, can see it in your eyes. Thank you, beautiful soul; peace.

  • @babyj5298
    @babyj5298 Год назад +14

    Wow!!! what an example of pulling back. Self respect, that's my motto for the year. No more investing energy where it isnt worth or of use.

  • @Stoned-jl6ky
    @Stoned-jl6ky 2 месяца назад +29

    I’m so happy to the extend my appreciation to
    Dr Oluwaseun, I can't stop thinking Dr Oluwaseun for connecting me back to my family thank you for the grate love spell.😇

  • @mildamilda3211
    @mildamilda3211 5 месяцев назад +130

    My daughter thought you were Jesus 😂

  • @MargetMints
    @MargetMints Год назад +7

    It is so true. It's irony of how it works.
    I gained a lot of confidence going to therapy, and it's changed my view on everything and that has changed my attitude and the way people look at me.
    I wish I went to therapy so many years before. I wish everyone would go and then it would be a world 10 times better cause everyone would be so mature and in control of themselves ❣️👌🏼

  • @cailic.774
    @cailic.774 Год назад +48

    Aaron you've truly changed my life. The last 6 months i've listened to your podcasts/all your videos, found your videos at a perfect time because I was the one chasing. You really changed my whole mindset and got me on a path to choose myself, and give others the advice i've learned from you too! Keep making videos and inspiring us all to realize our worth!!

  • @daniellemoreno1987
    @daniellemoreno1987 Год назад +17

    This is something I'm guilty of right now. This video hit me hard. Did not expect to break down! Thank you for making this video.

  • @catherine8499
    @catherine8499 4 месяца назад +7

    I am in this situation right now and i decided to just let go. I don't wanna chase anymore. Let him do the chasing this time.

    • @readwithahmai
      @readwithahmai 4 месяца назад

      me too. I've been available for my husband all the time and now he's pulling away from me. I'll just give him all the space he needs and let him realize my worth. He's only thinking about getting stronger and over exercising till bedtime. I'm so annoyed.

    • @Shiekhempathpowers
      @Shiekhempathpowers 4 месяца назад

      Same here ! Hun how u feeling I’m in my power and I fight to keep it everyday took me long to get here ❤I missed two phone calls and he said I’m done I’m like wait we was nothing but getting to know each other an friends geesh 😂😂

  • @maianhdao986
    @maianhdao986 Год назад +8

    What you said hits me hard. True. You're right. Their pulling away has nothing to do with my worth. If they want me, they will come back. If not, that's still fine. I don't know if there is really someone better out there among 8 billion people, someone who is meant for me, someone who is willing to stay no matter what but ... I will keep my hope and faith. Thank you for making this video. I do feel like it links to some moments in the past when I felt neglected and ... I did have to prove myself to receive care and attention. I will care about myself now. It's hard to do because I have never really cared about myself. Gonna try my best. Just feel mentally and emotionally drained, resent and all the negative emotions ... This is gonna be a long journey for me ...

    • @carlauchoaknoll
      @carlauchoaknoll Год назад +2

      Good luck for you. It is pain full the journey to meet/heal ourself but it is worthy. It is more painful to realize we've spent precious time of our life trying to fix other people in our life who doesn't chose us. Negligencing ourself is insane. Choose you anyway ❤️

    • @maianhdao986
      @maianhdao986 Год назад +1

      @@carlauchoaknoll Thank you for your kind words. Yeah, learned the lesson the hard way sadly. Just want to have someone reciprocating my feelings but oh well, what will be will be I guess.

  • @whtchclt85
    @whtchclt85 Год назад +23

    This is exactly what I needed to hear at this very moment! The universe speaks to us in amazing ways. I choose me!!

  • @AFO3310
    @AFO3310 Год назад +6

    It's amazing how true this is. I've learned the hard way as well. It's 100% natural instinct to chase. DON'T CHASE!

  • @brentvanderzanden3891
    @brentvanderzanden3891 Год назад +65

    Perfect timing!

  • @jenniferklopman2557
    @jenniferklopman2557 Год назад +5

    Do that frame technique he's talking about! It works ❤ I'm only in the beginning stages of making these changes and all of this is truly helpful. No nonsense approach to knowing, valuing and truly loving yourself. Keep going, there's a tremendous prize waiting for you!!!
    And he's right, you ARE worthy AF and deserving of all of that love you've been putting out. Chose yourself

  • @debradeane6151
    @debradeane6151 8 месяцев назад +1

    I learned this late in life, but at age 60, I am living this. I do not chase. I stand firm in my own care and power now
    It's fantastic! I am a Narcissist-Free Zone now!

  • @MysteriousRNP
    @MysteriousRNP Год назад +28

    This video reminds me to take a step back and give myself energy back that I don't realize I really need it right now. Thank you so much ❤️

  • @hibaal-sharif374
    @hibaal-sharif374 Год назад +212

    I think this kind of dynamic is immature like can't ppl love each other both ways I just dislike the whole chasing games

    • @malhunt7
      @malhunt7 Год назад

      Games are played by unhealthy, emotionally stunted fools.

    • @KNOCKOUTCLUBFC
      @KNOCKOUTCLUBFC Год назад +36

      It is what it is, we didn't make the game, we're just the players

    • @EviLxFifi
      @EviLxFifi Год назад +2

      This!

    • @krs10xnicole
      @krs10xnicole Год назад +3

      YES 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

    • @yashadiwal5712
      @yashadiwal5712 Год назад +11

      Ikr,, feels like holding back ,,, just because the world is so fucked up around us,, and so in a way the whole world is the culprit

  • @MaybeBeni
    @MaybeBeni 5 месяцев назад +3

    Really needed to hear this. I have abandoned myself for some time now, and I need to give myself all the love I’ve been wanting to give someone else. Thank you for this video man ✊🏼🖤

  • @Selfmagnet
    @Selfmagnet Год назад +16

    Ouch that hurts 😢 I definitely have some abandonment issues. I felt like a wall. I’ve been choosing me lately

  • @kerry-leeslamat252
    @kerry-leeslamat252 Год назад +17

    I have chosen myself 🙋🏻‍♀️😁💯.....❤️🙌
    I AM ENOUGH, MORE THAN ENOUGH, INDEED! I'm re-investing my energy into myself and letting go.
    THANK YOU AARON for imparting your knowledge with us 😁🙋🏻‍♀️

  • @violets7775
    @violets7775 Год назад +11

    So true. I just emerged last year after 14 years of learning to love being single. At first i thought i might meet someone at my new Latin dance class, and no one paid any attention. Then i fell in love with ALL the men and decided it was better being single. Suddenly a flurry of them asked for my number and two came to my place at New Year. It's crazy!

  • @pandababyz77
    @pandababyz77 4 месяца назад +2

    I wasn’t expecting this message to strike reality in me. Even shed a little tear. Great job 👏🏾

  • @angusyoung119
    @angusyoung119 Год назад +9

    This made me cry so much. On my break at work. And I needed it. Thank you.

    • @lawofthesun
      @lawofthesun 4 месяца назад

      Be strong mate . Man up

    • @angusyoung119
      @angusyoung119 4 месяца назад

      @@lawofthesun I was in a tough spot a year ago. Doin MUCH better now💪

  • @Andrew_Garza
    @Andrew_Garza Год назад +7

    It’s tough when you learn and realize this too late, I needed to hear this.

    • @Ladybugginit
      @Ladybugginit 6 месяцев назад

      It's never too late. You're right on time.

  • @Junior-zf5ed
    @Junior-zf5ed Год назад +9

    I needed this today. My wife of 25 years is separating from me and getting her own place and I been to dependent on her and needy, this stops now, I’m a good person and will focus this energy on myself

    • @GUITARTIME2024
      @GUITARTIME2024 Год назад +1

      Update

    • @Junior-zf5ed
      @Junior-zf5ed Год назад

      @@GUITARTIME2024 we talk daily, try to do something together once a week, I know she’s out there partying and sleeping around but my focus has been on myself. I lost 70lbs since this post several months ago and strive to be the best version of myself I can be. Maybe someday she will see that and want to work things out, but if not i truly hope she finds what she’s looking for in this life. I’m gonna wait 6 more months which will be a year and if there’s no change I will file for divorce.

    • @drprofessor1414
      @drprofessor1414 10 месяцев назад

      Update us

  • @hcpcapitalllc
    @hcpcapitalllc Год назад +10

    I 100% agree with the energetics explained, however, I also learned that if you've already developed a mature trusting and vulnerable relationship with a person (whether romantic or friend), you can also reach out and communicate and be direct AKA ask what is wrong. You have to read the situation. Sometimes you should truly give them space, other times it's okay to gently and honestly ask what's going on.

    • @Stuttsis
      @Stuttsis 8 месяцев назад

      This. It´s not about games or doing things a certain way. Sometimes you just want to check on them too.

  • @juniorfelix6776
    @juniorfelix6776 Год назад +4

    I know people usually watch these videos and say that they needed to hear this or the person reported their life 1000% accurately!
    But duuude, this is me! For the 1st time, I relate 100000% to a video like this! It’s like you’re talking about me specifically and directly! Daaamn! Thanks!

  • @allsky4203
    @allsky4203 Год назад +2

    thank you for this video, i've been thinking about this girl that has been pulling away from me and i could't think straight because she made me feel the emotions i think i've never felt. I was scared of letting go, thinking i won't be feeling those things without her, but this video is a confirmation of what i've been thinking of for the last few days. Life goes on, if she doesn't come back i will still have myself

  • @CambiaSeTuMejorYo
    @CambiaSeTuMejorYo Год назад +5

    It’s actually true! Thank you very much for expanding on the subject taking into consideration the energy, I was wondering why I was feeling like crap. The moment I stopped trying to pull her back with my thoughts, it suddenly my energy came back to me and felt very at ease and calm. I will definitely stop thinking about her and yes, I had a problem with abandonment in my childhood and finished a codependent relationship. Finally I and making my way to total emotional healing. You nailed it 👍🏻

  • @peipeixi
    @peipeixi Год назад +20

    A guy I dated is pulling away and it made me want to chase him more. He’s really making me feel bad but I don’t have enough self-discipline to stop chasing him

    • @anushkachaturvedy3624
      @anushkachaturvedy3624 Год назад +9

      You do , find it within you. You're stronger than you give yourself credit for .

    • @KuGirlFilms
      @KuGirlFilms Год назад +1

      I am in the same situation. Have u managed to break free?

    • @anushkachaturvedy3624
      @anushkachaturvedy3624 Год назад +6

      @@KuGirlFilms It ended in a break up. I was in the same situation as peixi. The first few days / weeks were horrible. After all, it's the energy cords snapping, and the one who loves more will always be in pain.
      However, now that it has been exactly a month. It couldn't have been for the better. Sometimes people show themselves out. It's for the best. Believe me, the peace and tranquility you'll feel when this energy sucker is gone is incomparable. So don't chase. Really don't. You'll never have to chase people who are meant for you.

    • @peipeixi
      @peipeixi Год назад +7

      @@KuGirlFilms Yup :) It's been a month but I feel so good. I feel free. Going back to this comment makes me wonder why the hell I did all that chasing for? Lol

    • @KuGirlFilms
      @KuGirlFilms Год назад +2

      @@peipeixi @Anushka hugs. so proud of you both. i hope I can do the same successfully.

  • @julieheinemann7654
    @julieheinemann7654 Год назад +10

    Aaron- you don't know HOW much I needed to hear this message right now! Thank you, thank you , THANK YOU!!!! xo

  • @Dan-dp5qi
    @Dan-dp5qi Год назад +2

    RUclips knows. Suddenly this video show up right when im having a battle in this toxic friendship of my mine. Thank you, my god Thank you

  • @ava198
    @ava198 Год назад +7

    Ugh was feeling playful but then you said some truth that made me cry 😪

  • @fabios779
    @fabios779 Год назад +8

    Dude…this videos are like therapy. I needed this SO F MUCH!
    Do more…please!

  • @ergitab1123
    @ergitab1123 Год назад +14

    Such a perfect timing! I'm going through something like this at the moment and this vid was quite eye-opening. This girl I've been going out recently started ignoring my texts and it has been fucking with my head for the last couple of days. But I think I found the answer in your video. I'll just...let go:)
    UPDATE:
    I think I can totally relate with what you said in the second part of the video. I was choosing someone who was not choosing me. I had to learn the hard way, after letting myself fall for her and trust her, I came to the realisation that I was much less important to her than she was to me. It's difficult to deal with, but I guess I'll have to move on.

    • @AnubhavSingh259
      @AnubhavSingh259 Год назад

      it's not perfect timing, probably u searched something related and RUclips now pumping similar vids

  • @Mamaratchet
    @Mamaratchet 5 месяцев назад +2

    Brooo!!! Ur better than therapists or psychologists!! I love this content!! I did come here and now I’m thinking I am choosing a person that’s not choosing me- Real Talk!!! Wow 🤯

  • @celemax4692
    @celemax4692 4 месяца назад +2

    I found your channel today, and I have two video so far, but let me say one thing, I think that all of the things that you say are very helpful. I have done tons of therapy, and I even spoken to my therapist a couple of weeks ago about this guy I can't stop thinking about, but now after watching this video I must say, I find myself understanding more about what's really happening to me than what my therapist told me. It's not an easy thing to do to break the toxic cycle of some relationships that we try so hard to mantain, mostly when they seem to be attached to some childhood toxic dynamics we seem to have from our past. I have felt so bad over the last month since I can't seem to understand why this person keeps making me feel so anxious and good at the same time, but it won't really give me all of the things that I need. I hope I can be strong enough to let him go If he is not really meant for me and move on. Thank you for your videos.

  • @shaggysmurf4422
    @shaggysmurf4422 5 месяцев назад +3

    It's so hard to let go because of the fantasy that it can turn into the most wonderful thing if you can make it work. But he's right. And I did use the word fantasy for a reason. I guess this is goodbye for now, my dear friend.

  • @user-blessingSam
    @user-blessingSam 2 месяца назад +30

    I don't really know how to thank Dr OLUWASEUN, you're sure a wonderful spiritualist ... thanks for bringing back my boyfriend🥰

  • @Ivy2713_
    @Ivy2713_ Год назад +22

    Not anymore I'm not. I chose me from now on!🖤

    • @FredrikAntonsen
      @FredrikAntonsen 5 месяцев назад

      ❤❤❤

    • @FredrikAntonsen
      @FredrikAntonsen 5 месяцев назад

      Do you have a tip jar? ❤️❤️❤️Because you are serving! 🥰🥰🥰

  • @thecastoutone1026
    @thecastoutone1026 Год назад +2

    i was abused multiple times in my childhood. then i found love of my life years later. i did some mistakes ( not cheating ) the way i cared about her made her feel that im controlling her life. im always feeling guilty about that and i wish more beautiful days will come soon like we two used to have. thanks aaron!