Ace Metaphor Talks Secret Life of F* Boys, Healthy Masculinity, Why People Get Hurt + More
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- Опубликовано: 23 авг 2024
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This week on the podcast Hafeez and Chris is joined by Ace Metaphor to discuss the secret life of f* boys, healthy masculinity, why people get hurt + more. If you like this episode with Ace Metaphor and want to see more of The Roommates be sure to subscribe to our podcast via any podcast streaming catalog to access our full catalog.
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Men who can practice celibacy are worthy of so much respect. Self control and discipline are characteristics of leaders.
That's what alot of women say online, but it's the opposite in real life..m
Outside of religion, I've never met a man that practiced celibacy. It's just not natural for a man.
True
@@TheEnigmaticBM39 true
I mean I’ve been celibate for 17 years, I’m 17 years old btw
I'm SO happy Ace spoke on the self-worth of men and the need to love themselves. Women get that talk a lot but men need to hear this too.
I'm 40 and I can assure you that it's not only young folks who are doing this. My generation is sadly immature as well.
kuunami facts!
Yes indeed.
Soooooo sad.
I have seen immature 50 year olds plus some years as well.
Yup... for a while there, I was meeting men 10 years younger who where more mature than men my age. it was weird! LOL
Praying to meet a healed man, preach it 🙏❤Ace. We r all work in process😔
The healing process takes time! Be patient with yourself ❤️
Andrea Janae first comment I see as I clicked on this video...thank you for this reminder ❤️ needed to read this rn
Very interesting view on serial dating and being intentional while dating. Have friends, but know how to draw the line and avoid “practicing” with people’s hearts. Couldn’t agree more.
Great advice and discussion guys!
Its dangerous to treat someone heart wrongly
@@stevosacorner you and the commentor would look cute together.
Thank you very much Ma. Its just that cool, respectful, God fearing and nice guys like us are still praying to be lucky to heart our own heartbeat. 60% of ladies today are gambling with good heart.
we practice as human beings to gain and enhance skills. There are other outcomes from sexual romantic relationships than hurt and heartbreak. I have had very joyful romantic experiences through which I learned a lot about relating, sensuality, partnering on projects and goals from relationships that did lead to marriage and were not intended to. I get their point but it’s narrow.
I’ve been single and celibate for 4 years ever since my last break up
Power to you brother, was celibate for 6 years up until recently as I'm in a relationship now. It was only after forming a healthy bond with my mom, and facing my mommy issue, was I able to enter a healthy relationship now.✊🏿
Im about to go onto my third month brother, trying to just focus on myself and grow so whenever i get into another one I can have a better relationship
MultiDiceman gotta start with forgiveness if the breakup was bad and if it wasn’t travel and post tons of pics on all your social media that’s what I did
@@Solgotmotion33 Been celibate all my life.. No one believes it when I say it but its actually true. I do not attribute it to power though. I think i just grew up with a contrarian mindset and I always never really felt that I needed a girl to validate me. Then I did the church thing and took that adultery stuff a bit too seriously.
You know when a woman is walking and there is this innate desire to look at her behind? I do not know what that is because it has never really occurs to me to do it myself unless someone tells me about it. Oh, I am 38 years with a bunch of academic degrees. I wouldnt call myself an academic genius by any means but I am driven to be the best clinician I can be
Any tips
Man the respect for this brotha Ace just went through the roof.
I totally agree!
Exactly bc he's being transparent
Pastor Voddie B. says
"Casual dating is nothing but Divorce practice ."
Doesnt make sense. Casual dating will get you to know what kind of women you like, it'll help you with communication skills and plenty more.
Makes perfect sense
BEST EPISODE OF THE YEAR SO FAR HANDS DOWN 🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️
First one held my attention I agree
I totally agree!
This was a highlighted episode for this season for sure ! I appreciate you all having Ace in for this discussion!
This was an awesome episode!
So many good things. Practice affirming yourself and learning about yourself.
"Most successful martial relationships aren't successful because of what they did after they said "I do", it's what they did before they did. It's the preparation they did on their character!" WOW ! 🔥🔥🔥
Preach Ace!!! 🙌🏾 So much truth! So many gems 💎!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Ace is so interesting and wise. This conversation good. I laughed and learned. Thanks guys!!! ❤️
Nice to hear a young smart black man!
I enjoyed this thoroughly. I teach my son that it's okay to be vulnerable and it's a sign of strength. I think it's so important to take time to heal as well. I hope people apply your message to their lives and I will as well. I am so grateful to have run across this video, I appreciate y'all xoxoxox
Becareful.. You dont wanna raise up a woman trying to raise a man
Such a great video! Ace has a high emotional IQ. I’m sure he will find a healthy forever relationship. ♥️
He is indeed a home builder
He has!
This is one of my favorite episodes I've listened to so far. I love when they have guests on who are just wildly emotionally intelligent where it's the PERSON who's interesting, and it literally doesn't matter what they say because all of it is valuable. Also, hafiz and chris's friendship is so precious and special and they both add so much to each episode. The show could not be what it is without both of them.
This just defined what I’ve felt but could never articulate effectively...thank you!
Thank you for sharing your insight. So many young people, as wells as older folks, need to hear. It can save us a lot of heartache. Spot on. 👍🏼
Man, this may be my favorite interview thus far. I love y’alls vulnerability in this episode. Definitely makes me feel like their are good guys that are out here putting in the work. Keep up the good conversations y’all!
Of course there are good men out there. Its up to you to differeniate between the person who has strong vs weak character.
Very profound insight Ace ! Selfishness , pride/egos, not knowing yourself or not following God’s direction biblically as the foundation of the relationship will harm the relationship and set it up for failure
I am branching out and moving away from the medical field too. It is scary, but I am over this rat race as well. You don't realize how much time is spent working each day and not much else.
I am moving unto the medical field to one day have my own business
This was such a great episode! I have dated both types and in the end my value for myself is worth more than my want for them if they aren’t ready. Emotional intelligence is key and this is why I am always seeking to improve myself and be self-reflective and self-aware so that my communication skills and relational skills are lit 🔥 😁
When he said “then do friend stuff...” i felt that!!A guy tried to tell me “we’re just friends” and that was my answer..”we’re not doing friends stuff,we are not just friends” but he didn’t hear me tho...i had to leave lol.
Ace reminded me of something I came to a conclusion of after a serious relationship had failed. "You can only meet someone at the depth they have met themselves" The statements about the gifts you bring and the size of someone else's glove is so damn accurate. you can't work to change someone's glove or make them understand but you can realize that what you have to offer may be received better elsewhere. being careful with your heart and where you place emotions is a serious thing
I wasn’t sure how I would receive this message but so far I love it and I’m not half way through the video. Ace got my follow on IG 😁😁😁
Love is a sacrifice!! Do your work to get healed! This interview was amazing thank you Roommates and Ace Metaphor I had never heard of him and he dropped some good nuggets!!!
Man Ace gave me so much hope just now. It's funny how things work. I remember watching a video of Ace couple years ago on Facebook. Yesterday I went out with a friend and she mentioned a guy name Ace that does videos and what have you not. Now first video I see pop up on my RUclips. So glad I decided to listen. Was such a breath of fresh air.
Thanks Hafeez and Chris!
Such a great video of black men giving information to the world about relationships and what needs to be done to make us better as men and women. Thank you RoomMates and Ace.
Just when i think "Oh that last episode was fire"!!! then Monday happens. Good information again guys.
Thank you brothers for the creation of a "safe" space to hear what we need to hear not what we want to hear. For years I jumped from relationship to relationship without healing. This message today helped me realize I've been a good guy with f boy tendencies. Looking back and realizing I've been hurt and never addressed the hurt. The old addage that hurt people hurt people is real, the hard part is living in the truth that you were the culprit behind future hurts and the pain of the women who've encountered you "broken". Ace and roommates, another good video. New follower 💯
Wow!! I'm so happy to have found this platform, finally men talking to men about their actions, so so often I see men telling woman what the should do, thank you✌🏾❤
this was one of the best episodes ..very healthy relationship talk...this is so needed to heal the way men and women relate...the work of healing oneself and taking time between relationships to look inside and learn about ourselves... and most importantly to stop blaming others for what we did or did not do that contributed to the demise of the relationship... this Brother is headed into the right direction..as a fellow Nurse...I could relate to the end of life story.. when it s all said and done.. family and relationships are what is most meaningful !
Loved listening to this discussion, Ace is a young man with an old wise soul, love him!❤
Yep broken hearts and so many baby mommas and daddies. Sad
This genaration don’t even know how a relationship works look at some of these comment. You have so much wisdom and education in this video and it’s small minded low budget education people who never hade a real relationship trying to disagree. You need more then good conversation and ciumsetry to have relationship
"Low budget education" 🙄🤭
This generation doesn't know about relationships? You think they knew any better back in the day? Lol.
Jae West compared to now ya this generation thinks relationships are about sex and being a roommate relationship now are a joke and won’t last past 3 years. I’m happy being single cuz I don’t have time for high school relationship
shanell the real issue is that, hes just speaking for woman, so this seems real to you. But he dont know what he talking about. thats why he been single 10 years
One of the most powerful and impactful episode video I have ever seen on RUclips. Period. 🙏
Best episode ever! Knowledge at every turn! ACE, I am officially a fan! Love your work. Thanks for having him on!
Woooooooooowwwwww that is my exact story from my early 20's I was an F*** Girl. So glad I am healed, whole, and pursuing self mastery and purpose now.
Omg....Good Guy with F boy tendencies...It just clicked that I am seeing one. Everything Ace said was real for me. This came at the right time for me. Im no longer entertaining these types of men!!
Marry someone who will change ur weakness to a strength. Watch and pray sister
Oh shit right here we saving lives, watch it there sis u make him aware of it he'll pivot and change the script on you and make u then think your helping become a better man baby omg and use that to keep you reeled in..that's advice confessions from a FBoy in recovery that is
I didnt know there was good guy with f boy tendencies until I experienced it in my last relationship. Sigh... I'm wiser now
This was so good! I'm feeling refreshed by this conversation and hopeful for men! I want to make it one of my goals to encourage men to be men and to also be ok with being vulnerable and expressing themselves. That's so important!
Thank you for sharing this valuable information, Ace, thank you for taking the time necessary to grow, mature and develop. I would love to sit across a table from a man who is full of your content, wisdom and level of maturity. I will continue to keep the faith that God will indeed send me a man like you....until then, I will patiently wait and continue to do my "work".👑❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
"Good Morning Beautiful" 🤣 That shit really work! Lol Great podcast all together. 👍
Mannnnnnnnnnnn this pod cast on point good job guys all day.
I normally do not comment on RUclips, but great vid fellas. The guy you were describing is me, a good guy with f boy tendencies. I’ve never heard it put that way and the video truly opened my eyes. I’m seeking growth and change to become that man envision myself being. Thanks!
I agree that the truth is stop playing games and be real! This is good to hear!!! Do the right thing!!! 😎
Thanks!
Loved everything about it! Go for the one that does and says what he/ she says is going to do ... 💜🙌🏼
This is such a good episode and talking about loving 3 parts of that person are so key... Thank you Ace for your amazing words of wisdom. All 3 of you men are doing amazing work, keep doing what you're supposed to be doing to better this world.
I love you Ace, you have helped changed my life! Much love.......
I really enjoyed this podcast. I've got some soul searching to do
Yes! Confirmation for me about a guy who I dated (no sex) previously who is everything on paper. Drives a BMW SUV, has a Master's degree and is handsome. Yet something about him kept telling me to back up. He has reappeared in my life and I told him as I did before NO SEX! I have never had a man try to use his education and usage of language to try to persuade me so much. I call him an educated f---boy. He has been engaged 3 times never married though and for some reason he feels that the flowers and dates are his way to my panties. Well, not today. He sends sexually suggestive texts and it's a turn off, especially after I told him NO SEX. I am just so disappointed in Black men right now. Even the "good guys" are jerks.
Tammi B You attract who you are not what you want, your description of what make him look good on paper says it all.
Disappointed in that black men...
Perhaps tell him he's getting BLOCKEDT if he sends another sexually suggestive text, as that's a clear violation of a boundary that you established for yourself. You have to show n prove with these men....with people in general.
I think this society hasn’t taught men and women how to be. Or to properly and intentionally give. It’s taught us how to take/run through.
Lakeisha Carter
Girl thank you so much for breaking it down to Patrick. I am so tired of humanism and word salad from these men.
The way he said “it is the simple things that matter” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣so funny 🤣
Chris is hilarious lol
But guys!!!!! This episode is LIFE!!!!!!!
I appreciate yall so much
You guys really put things into the right perspective and this is much needed.
So many people have no clue who they r and what they do or dont like because we go into these situationships and relationships blindly. We have this go with the flow mentality and that's so unwise. I took a year off for no dating to get to know me and God deeper. I'm going on 2 years and it's the best decision I've ever made. I believe God is opening me up to dating now and it's a shift in my mind involving myself with a man now. Im happy to have videos like these on RUclips
When you do the right thing, honestly from the deepest part of your soul, it will follow you for the rest of your life.
You can never be bitter whatsoever
But life is gonna be fulfilling
I feel so sad, I can't trust one single man anymore. My heart is so broken by one guy, a year we're not together but I can't heal at all. He mistreated me so badly, lied to me, sold me false dreams and completely broke my self-esteem. I feel suicidal at times. Everything is just one big joke to guys, I hate them all. I'd rather die alone then go through that hurt again.
@Dani Hx Thank you so much for the kind words. I'm better now, but even with the hurt he caused me I still want to call him from time to time, because I still care. I stop myself but I'm sad without him. I try to remind myself that I was even sadder with him and unfulfilled.
I just don't understand men, they say they love you but don't want to commit. They want to keep their options open and don't care who they hurt along the way.
I wish you the best. With or without somebody we will be happy, I refuse to not believe that.
@@iridescentraindrop I know this won't heal your pain, but its not just women who go through this.
It's messed up when either ssx does this to the other. But its not just a man or woman thing.
@@Mental_Alchemist Thank you, I'm trying to not be hateful or biased against every guy, but it's difficult sometimes. I know everyone can go through this regardless of their gender, but maybe because men are less expressive it feels like it's mostly women that get hurt like that.
Girl I definitely feel your pain. I’m 30 years old and I definitely don’t want a relationship at all.
Wow!
Amazing content!
Thank you for creating this platform and for the intelligent dialogue.
I often find that us not taking the time and space to understanding what we really feel, why we feel it and not being clear about what we want is why we waste so much time and have to go through a lot pain. I really enjoyed this conversation and loved hearing it from a male perspective. Thank you.
Ace made a lot of great points thank you very much we all suppose to love ourselves even though your hurt on the inside
This is why I’m focused on God, my purpose and my family.🙏🏾💰👩👧👦
Keep up the great job Kings!!
1:08:20 ..every man needs to hear this
What a blessing, thank you so very much my young brothers.💯
I appreciates ur speeches and talking about making a sound home. I love the aspects of marrying for who they are.
Preach Ace lol...real men do cry and share their blankets if their homie is cold lol...Go Roommates Podcast keep inspiring, growing and uplifting.
Amazing! Watching from UK
Dope podcast ❤️
It's very unfortunate that men think we care about a man's financial status. It is frustrating dealing with men who aren't financially responsible or who I feel like is comfortable with me taking care of him like he's still a child. But it has more to do with lack of ambition/initiative than how much money he has. Like, I wouldn't want a man who just sits around the house all day watching tv or just hanging out with his friends. There are plenty of women like me who don't expect men to financially take care of/splurge on us because we are in a time where we can do that for ourselves. So, a man's "wealth" is less appealing since we now don't have to depend on it to survive.
No ma'am....please never tell a man that his financial status is not important because in this world a man must be a provider in order to compete with the other men in society and win. Black men have been let off the hook when it comes to providing. Black women must be independent because the men are not dependable. Although women can do for themselves, women in a relationship with a man should not HAVE TO do for themselves. The man is useless in a marriage if he is not resourceful.
Forget all the romance crap...finance plus romance keeps communities strong.
@@user-wr5he7df6z and being submissive and feminine also goes a long way in maintaining families
You chose to date a loser woman. Most men are employed. You're just good at finding the losers
@@TheEnigmaticBM39 Black chicks man
@@infozone9601 yeah.
20:45 is the answer. I think more time needs to be spent on emphasizing on developing and listening to intuition/spiritual discernment. Yes!!! And the right questions - men and women. Believe the answer!
One of the best episodes!
Chris's reaction to hafiz's use of the word "French" was absolute gold
One of the best episodes!!! I learned so much.
This was so good. Getting back on the horse after a long relationship can be scary thing. Watching this gives me hope that some men really want a real relationship.
Some dope books on this
Manhood Restored : How the Gospel makes men whole by Eric Mason
Cry Like A Man by Jason Wilson
End Faking Fine by Esther Fleece
Sex ,Jesus and The Conversation the Church Forgot by Mo Isom
14:22 my ex boyfriend good guy with fboy tendencies.... Wow. Thank you one of my good friends told me he was when I told her about what he did during the breakup. I kinda didn't believe her but now you have confirmed it.👏👏👏
So good!!! I really enjoyed this episode!
🤦🏻♀️🤣😂👌🏼 "Nike sign" Lo-Key subliminal message to the Hunnies....Baby be like Nike "Just Do It" 🤦🏻♀️😂🤦🏻♀️
That was deep man.. Such I powerful message from Ace Metaphor. Thank you for the amazing content you beautifully handsom people!
I can't wait to see him when he comes to Memphis! I love him
Awesome message 👏🏾💯 I need to hear this thank you. I have to do better
This!!!!! what a great convo, Ace is preachin
What a blessing to see these topics being discussed and valued by men as we so often only hear the female perspective. Thank you for everything you guys are working on. This content will be therapeutic for so many who are lost.
One of the best sessions so true so real great guest!
I also cried during that movie.. very good to be able to relate emotionally to those types of experiences, memories and such.
This was so dope
Wheres the lie? All truth. I love , love , loved this episode. Thank y'all
Great video
Ace!! That last statement was a deep one. Come on sir! Never thought about it like that
Ace THANK YOU
Thank you brother Ace for all the bombs. Needed this at this transition time of my life.
I think hurt is necessary. Hurt equals growth. I’m thankful for my experiences and wouldn’t be the Queen I am today without hurt/lessons.
Every man needs to hear and really UNDERSTAND 57:00.
This guy is so smart and so on point. Whatever woman gets him will be sooo fortunate.
Great conversation 🔥🔥
Great show for men and women ❤️
Thank you so much! God bless you! Very informative!,,
OMG this is soooo goooddd 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Great stuff! Very powerful! 👍👍💙🔥
This guy is so right. We ladies really fall just the little things. As a lady its really had to sport such a fuck boy. To be honest Thank God I have a deeper connection and strong relationship with God. That really helped me hey. The way to actually eliminate these fuck boy is telling them that you are celibate and will only have sex after marriage and you don't do sleepovers, Netflix and chills. Remember you don't say all these things on the first date.
Get to know them, ask questions what they want in life, their goals and if you hear them say, "I said marriage its not my thing.... I will see it myb after 4 yrs and please stop overthinking life like you have to have an answer to every feeling or situation. and lastly , Wen am with u am wit u in our world alone.... No other ppl". Talking from experience. Run... He will say it's your choice, You leaving me I am not, I love you.."
Ace needs a 30 second vid about her being there at end of days. Been saying it for years.
Practical advice. Dating with intention or not at all. Strongly agree. At the root is a disconnected man. The root of addiction, being a player/f-boy, narcissism, violence, withdrawal, etc.
The documentary The Mask You Live In does an incredible job breaking down societal conditioning of masculinity and the unhealthy aftermath.