🚩 Watch Out! Spotting Red Flags in Muslim Women: 5 Warning Signs

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  • Опубликовано: 5 мар 2024
  • As someone deeply invested in understanding the intricacies of relationships within the Muslim community, I've compiled crucial insights to help navigate potential red flags in women. In this video, I delve into five key warning signs that every Muslim man should be aware of when evaluating a prospective partner. By arming yourself with this knowledge, you'll empower yourself to make informed decisions and navigate the complexities of Muslim courtship with confidence and clarity.
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Комментарии • 617

  • @alasryh
    @alasryh  4 месяца назад +253

    Just a reminder, if you perceive a conversation on red flags in women as portraying women "negatively", then there's emotional maturity that is lacking and some self-work to do. We all fall short and all have things to work on. Righteous men deserve to have women who prioritize healthy relationships as do righteous women deserve men who do :). There's also a red flag video on things to look for in Muslim men, please see it

    • @KAIZORIANEMPIRE
      @KAIZORIANEMPIRE 4 месяца назад +17

      lol this has very little to do with women or men, you will always get immature people "REACTING" to anything that is hard. They will grow insha allah :) thanks for the video

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +8

      That's very true!@@KAIZORIANEMPIRE

    • @MuhammadAli-xw4yc
      @MuhammadAli-xw4yc 3 месяца назад +9

      As salam alaikum sister I'm a revert brother sunni Muslim. I got a marriage proposal from a revert polish sister who has been divorced 4 times. To me this is red flag. I prayed istikarah about this. Tbh since I took my shahada in 2009. I have known tons of true stories of revert sister's getting used by tons of born Muslim men. And tons of born Muslims using revert brothers left and right. So I'm scared to death. Before I became disabled I was getting tons of families throwing their daughters my way. After sitting with them. I asked Islamic questions. I saw tons of red flags. And basically ran away. Now I don't want to marry a sister in the west. And over here many Muslims discriminate against me because I have black outs.but apart from that I'm healthy. I seriously at my wits end. Even many brothers are not trust worthy. Sending me sister's sister's that make me run for da hills.

    • @faheemahatrash400
      @faheemahatrash400 3 месяца назад +3

      @@MuhammadAli-xw4yc Aww brother May Allah ease it for you. I recommend one tajjud during this Ramadan, talk to Allah like his your creator but best friend who knows exactly what you are going through more than yourself, you’ll see that he’ll answer you in the right way. And remember that you are amazing and once you are secure in your relationship with Allah, who btw has alot of Mercy and affection for you, everything will fall into place, In sha Allah. I’ll make dua for you too In sha Allah and remember that muslim sister revert may be in the same situation as you

    • @wh1t3_gh0st6
      @wh1t3_gh0st6 3 месяца назад +1

      Salaam alaykum, I really respect you for being so down to earth and genuine. I've been living in Makkah for 16 years as a white American revert who was just really blessed. I spent all this time working on myself and trying to be a good person/man/father/etc. I hope one day when it is my time I can be proud of the work I did. Thank you for encouraging me and many others.

  • @HK00088
    @HK00088 4 месяца назад +413

    As A Muslim man, this video is helpful. May Allah bless us with good righteous spouse.

  • @manharocks2799
    @manharocks2799 4 месяца назад +208

    Red flags in women:
    1. A woman who has an outrageously high maher. (Very materialistic)
    2. A woman who thinks she is the princess, as a mode operation. (Very materialistic)
    3. A woman who is hot and cold. Either texting you all the time or ghosting you.
    4. A woman who is hyper independent, and does not want to work through her issues.
    5. A woman who carries the mindset 'all men are trash'. (Oppressive mindset)
    6. A woman who is a major gossiper.
    Advice: don't speak ill of your spouse to a.n.y.o.n.e ever.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +15

      Thank you for this!

    • @blissfuldeenn
      @blissfuldeenn 4 месяца назад

      Jazakallahu khairan!

    • @sanaa.3216
      @sanaa.3216 4 месяца назад +10

      Almost all men are tho. Guess ill stay single forever lol

    • @iamapokerface8992
      @iamapokerface8992 4 месяца назад +1

      women usually have more red flags tbh

    • @SunFlower-qe3up
      @SunFlower-qe3up 4 месяца назад

      ​@@sanaa.3216🧐

  • @noraali3452
    @noraali3452 4 месяца назад +219

    I clicked this video because I thought it was going to be red flags in Muslim women, for women friendships- but I genuinely feel like all of your points still apply to female friendships. If a woman is neglecting to treat a man she wants to marry with respect, that's a red flag for the girlies around her too.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +43

      Oh that's SUCH an interesting way to look at it. Yes, I guess these could also apply in that they're just red flags for relationships in general.

    • @s7_wys
      @s7_wys 3 месяца назад +10

      That actually makes sense because a sister I used to talk to for marriage had no friends whatsoever and I used to wonder why that's the case but then I slowly found out because she lacked communication and simple respect. When a girl says she has no friends because she's independent, in some cases it's true but in most cases it's because they think they are better than other girls to befriend them.

    • @Bellaaaa98
      @Bellaaaa98 3 месяца назад +1

      Literally thought the same. I’d like a video on this too

    • @andsi-r
      @andsi-r 3 месяца назад +1

      ​@@s7_wysI wish someone smacked the sense into me before😢 an ex friend I had told me everyone in her life, outside family, leaves her etc and no one made efforts with her and whatnot and I should have realised to leave it there and then. She was literally telling me that no one wants to be that friend with her and it should be a sign to me and also a warning that she was trying to emotionally make me feel bad from stepping away from a bad relationship.
      I stuck with her for two years and it cost me so much of my education... I wish I listened to what she was saying to me.
      She is also someone who openly mentions her husbands and brothers faults which is backbiting and I stopped telling her because she simply didn't listen. I don't go around her anymore.

    • @hawaali2851
      @hawaali2851 3 месяца назад

      I thought same.

  • @jesusvillagomez4020
    @jesusvillagomez4020 3 месяца назад +51

    Not a Muslim yet , but I’m glad this pop up for future reference

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +25

      Ayyy, see this as your Muslim online community and we can't wait to welcome you to the ummah

    • @itscoldouthere8971
      @itscoldouthere8971 3 месяца назад +7

      May Allah guide you brother ❤

  • @fatimasamira3695
    @fatimasamira3695 4 месяца назад +54

    thank you for talking about the mahr in realistic and practical way. " ....Just because something is halal or a right of a person doesn't mean it's a wise decision...."

  • @theguy2461
    @theguy2461 3 месяца назад +18

    Kudos to you, couldn't have said it better, there is no negativity towards men and women, just pure positive

  • @user-st1ej2tg4u
    @user-st1ej2tg4u 4 месяца назад +43

    This is so true, men bring more than just finances to a relationship! So glad you’re putting your content out🎉 there

  • @raiseyourdeen
    @raiseyourdeen 4 месяца назад +14

    Salaam sister. Mash'Allah this video is popping off and for good reason. As I'm currently going through the process of getting married myself, your video had some very useful points to reflect on. And it's refreshing to hear a Muslimah talk about red flags in Muslimahs!

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +5

      Baarak Allah feek! Just checked out your channel as well and you do incredible work. I'm going to shoot you an email isA and perhaps we can consider a collab (I have a weekly show I do on my channel), I can bring my husband onboard for modesty purposes. Wa alaikum asalam!

  • @safwanremind
    @safwanremind 4 месяца назад +13

    As a man, this video is very helpful بارك الله فيك

  • @James-yg5lm
    @James-yg5lm 4 месяца назад +4

    Mashallah on point. Thank you for talking about this. It is soo needed for all

  • @maanso6583
    @maanso6583 3 месяца назад

    Somali dude here, subscribed. Jzk for the advice. Definitely was an eye opener

  • @ztmnbrkt
    @ztmnbrkt 3 месяца назад +29

    Hana, it's is rare to find people as well spoken as you are. Jazakiallah khair. Thank you for this information. Alhamdullillah, we have a community that is mindful of its short-comings and mindful of Allah!

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +4

      So sweet of you but I don’t think I’m as well spoken, the video is just edited, ameen ya rab and wa iyakum ✨

    • @JsHd-iy8il
      @JsHd-iy8il 3 месяца назад

      Ameen

    • @Qalaska
      @Qalaska 3 месяца назад

      @@alasryh Asalama alaykum hanna ramadaan mubaarak dear sister god bless you at all can I have your email address please my name is Ahmed I live in USA

  • @futureworldhealing
    @futureworldhealing 3 месяца назад +1

    very well said sister. May Allah continue to increase you in wisdom and knowledge so you can share it with many more ameen

  • @edwardarias1312
    @edwardarias1312 3 месяца назад +1

    Thank you for sharing your insights. I love learning about all parts of Islam as a revert. May Allah continue to bless you and your family🙏

  • @Sami-mm
    @Sami-mm 3 месяца назад +1

    Glad I watched this today. Thank you for this.

  • @feisalsamadi9133
    @feisalsamadi9133 3 месяца назад

    Sister Hana, this was so beneficial. It's honestly a blessing that you talked about this. I hope both men and women can learn from this. God bless.

  • @ilm_seeker
    @ilm_seeker 4 месяца назад +5

    Great advice sis 👍May Allah reward you with kheir in this life and the next, Ameen 🤲

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +1

      Ameen ya rab

  • @shappirefishing1186
    @shappirefishing1186 27 дней назад

    JazakAllah Khair for the informative video

  • @habbyhouse
    @habbyhouse 3 месяца назад

    Thank you for posting this video. It has given me hope in women in general.

  • @raydude1510
    @raydude1510 3 месяца назад +2

    Great video sister, may Allah reward you 🤲🏾

  • @AromaX11
    @AromaX11 3 месяца назад +1

    Glad to see content like this.

  • @walidmohammad4648
    @walidmohammad4648 3 месяца назад +2

    May Allah Bless you! This is the best video I have seen in so long !!

  • @ahmedshahab4105
    @ahmedshahab4105 3 месяца назад +1

    Nice video and definitely needed video. Especially with the rise of red pill movement and "what do you bring to the table" podcasts.

  • @user-xc1tw8ok4w
    @user-xc1tw8ok4w Месяц назад

    Iam so glad to meet you and say contenou your struggle and to support you

  • @muchoudh
    @muchoudh 3 месяца назад +4

    Thanks sister for providing this very important advice for women these days looking to get married. People should listen to your advice, of all faiths and backgrounds.

  • @KamilaTekin
    @KamilaTekin 4 месяца назад +185

    You forgot number 6: the women who beautify themselves in front of other men

    • @yobro6053
      @yobro6053 4 месяца назад +47

      Guy friends, social media thirst traps…

    • @Truth_Seeker1202
      @Truth_Seeker1202 3 месяца назад +28

      THAT'S RED FLAG NUMBER 1!

    • @f.a9376
      @f.a9376 3 месяца назад +32

      @@Truth_Seeker1202mate modesty for adult Muslims is very important, but calling it the number one red flag is a bit much.

    • @user-sk4dp2pk5n
      @user-sk4dp2pk5n 3 месяца назад +20

      not always a red flag some women have amazing character and they still fall into that sin. perhaps they are in the journey of trying

    • @ab00abdullah
      @ab00abdullah 3 месяца назад +2

      Depending on the society, culture, and level of religiosity it goes from a norm these days for many to red flag.

  • @aamirecan
    @aamirecan 4 месяца назад +2

    Good points. Thanks homie.

  • @patrickzavyn
    @patrickzavyn 3 месяца назад +1

    Thank you so much for sharing this! For me as a german revert it is very informative especially the Mahr part. What you say is true and it makes me happy to see that there are people around that give their best to be useful, you deserve the attention and are a gift for our Ummah, so I hope inshallah I can trigger the algorithm with this comment. Asselamu Aleykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu from Germany.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Wa alaikum asalam wrwb, thank you so much for this kind comment. I’m happy it helped!

  • @omarmohammad220
    @omarmohammad220 4 месяца назад +82

    Can you kindly add timestamps in your future videos it will make it very helpful for the viewers.

  • @mmmha7572
    @mmmha7572 3 месяца назад +5

    Well done. This video is a breath of fresh air in a world of toxic narratives around men vs women, black vs white, etc.
    As a happily married man of many years everything you said is on point mashallah. Keep up the good work.

  • @mshelkateb
    @mshelkateb 3 месяца назад +1

    Excellent points,may Allah reward you. Wisdom is a key attribute lacking in most people globally today, may Allah grant us wisdom.

  • @jag353
    @jag353 3 месяца назад +21

    This is a solid video soliciting self-critique among the sisters and awareness among the brothers

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +2

      Alhamdulillah, that was the intent

    • @shockadellick
      @shockadellick 3 месяца назад

      @@alasryh
      Our time here on this planet is like the rain...it comes and goes.
      1. Men want the women before she turns 30 years.
      2. Women who have not reached 30 want the most money.
      That said, the man feels he has lost if she is old, and the woman feels she has lost because her husband isn't rich.
      3. If I'm not mistaken, the prophet's first wife was older than him?
      4. If I'm not mistaken, our lord said it was better to marry a believing SLAVE than to marry an unbeliever?
      Sister your soul reflects all the goodness in the points I mentioned...please keep teaching and reminding true believers of our true objective. Peace and Blessings.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      @@shockadellick baarak Allah feek, deen above everything. It’ll take you far

  • @Lollololollllljj
    @Lollololollllljj 3 месяца назад +3

    Asking the right questions when u first meet clear most of these points

  • @blackphoenix123
    @blackphoenix123 3 месяца назад +5

    Thank you so much for the knowledge, I dated a beautiful Egyptian girl when I was younger, always had respect for all my Muslim family…I’ll never forget when I was a teen and didn’t have enough money for food they always blessed me…much love and respect from New York Jamaican ♥️🇯🇲🙏🏽

  • @hafsashikhey4011
    @hafsashikhey4011 3 месяца назад +2

    Great content I'm glad this showed up on my feed❤

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Thank you sis

  • @7Kazi7
    @7Kazi7 4 месяца назад +2

    Jazakallah for this video

  • @duddamac7199
    @duddamac7199 3 месяца назад +2

    MashaAllah I love this video because it’s helpful to men WITHOUT sounding like you’re pandering to men

  • @wasimmomin1128
    @wasimmomin1128 4 месяца назад +26

    Jazak Allah sister for dropping this video. Do more videos regarding marital relationships. Because in this world of hyper independency, people have tend to forget that Allah Subhan Wa Ta'ala has created us in pairs so that we can fulfill our physical needs in halal way.

    • @The3rd411
      @The3rd411 3 месяца назад

      and emotional needs

    • @CreativeexplorerTPT
      @CreativeexplorerTPT 3 месяца назад

      Why is it always about physical needs though? It is not needed to survive honestly.

    • @wasimmomin1128
      @wasimmomin1128 3 месяца назад

      @@CreativeexplorerTPT It is fine if you can stay single forever. Getting married isn't mandatory. But one needs to make sure that he/she will not fall into a haraam relationship by committing adultery.

    • @CreativeexplorerTPT
      @CreativeexplorerTPT 3 месяца назад

      @@wasimmomin1128 agreed, or have a more mature approach and do it to start a family too

    • @wasimmomin1128
      @wasimmomin1128 3 месяца назад +2

      @@CreativeexplorerTPT exactly, if Allah has created a halal outlet for our desires of intimacy then why we shouldn't take the advantage of it?

  • @Blickstar123
    @Blickstar123 3 месяца назад +1

    Waalaykumusalam sister, JazakAllahu Khairan May Allah bless you and your family and give you Jannah. AMEEN. Ramadan Mubarak

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Wa iyakum, ameen!

  • @yosrbouzayen6917
    @yosrbouzayen6917 3 месяца назад

    I love you sister! Amen to everything you said! Baraka Allahu fiki

  • @juicefa9642
    @juicefa9642 3 месяца назад +3

    Salaamou Alaikoum Sister,
    First of all, Ramadan Mubarak! I think this is a really informative video for me as a muslim man. And also for woman too. I really needed this. Thanks for this video. I also watched other videos of yours, which I also found interesting. You have a subscriber! Keep doing your thing! Baraka Allahofiki!.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Baarak Allah feekum ,thank you!

  • @suadfarole5136
    @suadfarole5136 25 дней назад +1

    As a Muslim woman, I support this statements and hope that other women will follow. ❤

  • @itscoldouthere8971
    @itscoldouthere8971 3 месяца назад +1

    This is a very respectable video, thank you so much sister. It helped me look at life from a different perspective

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +1

      JAK for watching!

  • @Unknown-vh6uo
    @Unknown-vh6uo 4 месяца назад +2

    Just found your channel! And im so glad i did, your videos seem very helpful thank you! ❤

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад

      Alhamdulilah!

  • @ismailowino2866
    @ismailowino2866 3 месяца назад

    masha'allah tabarakallah!so insightful!

  • @nadiafillis8432
    @nadiafillis8432 4 месяца назад +4

    Asalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wabarakatuh sister hana JazakAllah khair for posting such a helpful video ❤❤❤

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +2

      WAS, wa iyaki, thank you for watching! Wa alaikum asalam wrwb

  • @iniestaxavi3826
    @iniestaxavi3826 4 месяца назад +20

    I am a man who just subscribed to this channel. I want to thank you for being understanding of men in your red flags in Muslim men video and in this video. I listened to the internet for years, I'm now in my 30's and always thought I wasn't good enough for a Muslim woman from the West because I don't have a well-respected career etc and substantial savings. I've always been very devout/practising etc. but I was driven by this insecurity which led to me developing a pretty powerful connection with a non-muslim woman for several months and almost committed Zina for the first time after steering clear my entire life.
    I'm not putting them on a pedestal, but a greater proportion of non-muslim women these days tend to be more open minded, less shallow and actually willing to build a life rather than expect it all there etc. May God forgive me for getting involved with her in the first place. Diaspora muslims carry a lot of cultural baggage and tend to pride themselves on materialism even if they have little. They compare and gossip more so that's another reason why I felt I'd never be enough for them. I grew up around only non-muslims and don't have a great exposure to other muslims.
    Although men should have the mentality to provide whatever they are able, I am now understanding that the "your money is my money" thing going around isn't quite accurate. I wish I would've known this earlier because I would've gotten married earlier and avoided developing strong feelings at one point for someone who isn't my wife. I have wronged my future wife.

    • @HK00088
      @HK00088 4 месяца назад +7

      A Muslim woman rejected me didn’t want to marry me because I was driving for Uber lol
      I’m not a bad looking brother.
      I do have a good job now. I think Muslims in American society are too with the modern society. There are good righteous Muslimahs out there. Allah knows best

    • @SS-cu8se
      @SS-cu8se 3 месяца назад +6

      @@HK00088no offence but I think women after a certain age are more interested in men that have already proven they have a stable job and income. I don’t think the sister was judging you but she probably thought you are not financially in the position to be married yet due to the instability of working for Uber. Going through hard times within a marriage is different than going through hard times before you’ve even begun a courtship. I think a lot of people can understand not wanting to involve themselves with someone they don’t really know who is also struggling. It’s a lot to take on from the very beginning and I can understand why anyone would be hesitant. Hope you’re not offended by my comment! I just wanted to provide an alternative perspective.

    • @HK00088
      @HK00088 3 месяца назад +6

      @@SS-cu8se I have a net worth of $1.2 million in real estate . But I will never discuss my true financial issue to a righteous woman I am about to marry, because it will show me if she’s interested in a good man, a good husband or not. And yes I do Uber and Lyft on the side. I am interested in this 1 woman but I’m trying to approach her respectfully as she’s from outside the country. Asalaamlakum peace

    • @AA-co9oo
      @AA-co9oo 3 месяца назад

      Brother, if the woman you are interested is willing to convert then it’s worth having a conversation.. if not then look elsewhere; preferably among volunteers for different charities.. we are also here to help people find the truth in Islam not exclude non-Muslims entirely.. I have friends on both sides and advise my daughters to marry from any country a righteous man, even if he is non-Muslim who chooses to revert for the sake of Allah…

  • @abdallahjohn
    @abdallahjohn 3 месяца назад

    Thank you for this

  • @JoaquimGonsalves
    @JoaquimGonsalves 3 месяца назад

    Jazakillah sister!

  • @sailorzuna7237
    @sailorzuna7237 4 месяца назад +14

    from the first 28 seconds I subscribed sisters support sisters periodt

  • @adeenabhat5878
    @adeenabhat5878 2 месяца назад

    Thank you sis

  • @outstandingpersonalrelationshi
    @outstandingpersonalrelationshi 4 месяца назад

    Great video and topic sister, Allahmma baarik

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад

      Baatak Allah fekeum

  • @lyamani7779
    @lyamani7779 3 месяца назад

    Amazing video!

  • @cheeseconsumer5710
    @cheeseconsumer5710 3 месяца назад +1

    This list is valid

  • @fs0598
    @fs0598 3 месяца назад

    thank you for shining a light to allow women who want marriage to reflect on themselves. i was curious, do you know of any easily accessible/online resources about unlearning hyperindependence? maybe a youtube channel that discusses such topics or books about it?

  • @mantrovant
    @mantrovant 3 месяца назад +3

    Thank you for sharing. I, sadly, am guilty of a few of these. I will do better.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +10

      Awareness and accountability are the BEST qualities, and in sha Allah we all can improve when we have those things. I had red flags too from trauma that I worked very very hard on to rid of so I could enjoy a healthy relationship.

  • @aaronlang686
    @aaronlang686 3 месяца назад +8

    I'm a Canadian brother revert, and I've had a somewhat difficult time understanding the mehr. It's a new concept to me.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +2

      Gotcha! It's just one of the things required to validate a marriage, seeks to honor a woman, is set by the woman (though in some instances, a woman might hand the right over to her father to set). There are many examples of different types of mahr in the seerah of the prophet SAW though most often it is money or gold. Should be something of value. Hope this small blurb helps

    • @luk9254
      @luk9254 3 месяца назад

      The mahr/mehr is financial security for a woman in case the husband dies or she gets divorced. It's supposed to be the thing she relies on financially while getting back on her feet.
      Unlike the alimony; a human secular concept; which in some cases has to be paid until the ex-husband is no longer. Allah made it fair for both men and women. The man provides, but is not expected to provide for the ex-wife at the cost of and rights of his new wife. Yet, he has to give her that so that she isn't left without after a divorce. Its a beautiful concept. Hope that helps.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +10

      @@luk9254 actually, that’s a common miscon, it isn’t for that reason (financial security) otherwise the sahaba who taught his wife Quran as her mahr would’ve been in sin. It’s simply a gift of value, and that can be monetary of spiritual value.

  • @thehiddenwarrior354
    @thehiddenwarrior354 3 месяца назад

    I instantly subbed because you seemed so genuine. Also because you look like a good woman and this is rare in the world. If you’re not married yet, you will have a lot of good men vying for your attention 😅 but also continue being worthy of theirs. Much love

  • @thebatcave89
    @thebatcave89 4 месяца назад +2

    Sister thank you for this video which highlights issues within my own marriage and something I can forward onto my children before they get married.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад

      In sha Allah ya rab! No problem, make a lot of duaa for the changing of hearts in your marriage this ramadan!

  • @RaeKwon-Doe
    @RaeKwon-Doe 3 месяца назад +1

    Very helpful sister. And your little quips are funny

  • @Anwar-AT
    @Anwar-AT 3 месяца назад +1

    ما شاء الله pretty good points. Sharing it with my sisters as well 😇

  • @mnnaqs
    @mnnaqs Месяц назад

    Fantastic video finally a fresh prospective

  • @abubakribnsalis
    @abubakribnsalis 3 месяца назад +3

    Muslimah, professional and actually knowledgeable? Yep subscribed. Masha'Allah keep the good content coming

  • @asadrazzle1859
    @asadrazzle1859 3 месяца назад +1

    Beautiful video.. i would be perfectly happy with any woman who doesn't have any of these red flags

  • @keepitreelcatfishing5883
    @keepitreelcatfishing5883 3 месяца назад +1

    Very good explanation of the mahr. Sadly many women and families see this as a buy/sell tactic

  • @theinternetkid
    @theinternetkid 3 месяца назад +1

    🎉 congratulations!

  • @mustafashahbaz2281
    @mustafashahbaz2281 3 месяца назад +1

    Thank you for this! Very helpful coming from a female perspective! Just like men know men, women know women.

  • @lawkexarib4616
    @lawkexarib4616 3 месяца назад

    Djzak allahu gairen dear sister from Holland!

  • @mainstreampropaganda7518
    @mainstreampropaganda7518 3 месяца назад

    This is my kind of person- level headed! I wish I could meet someone like her. My experience is that these kind of muslim women are taken and not available or I am invisible to them! Team work together in a relationship is a wonderful thing!

  • @africanqueen4943
    @africanqueen4943 3 месяца назад +3

    Such a great video. This is the narrative that I tell other muslim women. I think what’s happened is that we have been deluded by the feminist ideology that we are independent mindset. May Allah guide our daughters to have humble mindset .

  • @itscoldouthere8971
    @itscoldouthere8971 3 месяца назад +1

    HEAVY ON #6 it applies for everyone not just spouses

  • @zeeinvest9473
    @zeeinvest9473 3 месяца назад +1

    I’m 26, I know nothing about marriage and women. You’re the sister I never had. Allah bless you. Thank you so much for educating me. I love your logic, wisdom and understanding. I can tell you speak from actual understanding sis. Please make more videos like this to help young males like me establish what to look out for.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +1

      Oh SubhanAllah, that’s a high compliment. IsA I will, thank you for watching and subscribing isA

  • @Yusuf-ep6yz
    @Yusuf-ep6yz 3 месяца назад +3

    JAK for this video, it really helped me look at certain aspects of marriage differently. if you have not already, please consider making a similar video for men - i for one could certainly benefit from it, as i am interested in getting married within the coming years insha’Allah. may Allah reward you for your efforts

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Wa iyakum. I did, it was the first video I made and can be found on my channel with a similar name.

  • @mariymashraf7937
    @mariymashraf7937 3 месяца назад

    Taking notes to better my self

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      That’s beautiful sis ❤️❤️❤️

  • @sonumohammed9610
    @sonumohammed9610 4 месяца назад +11

    "Just because it's halaal doesn't mean it's always the wisest thing to do". Brilliant statement.
    As a man, if a woman tells me she wants 100k as mahar, I'm gonna start thinking like she is not a woman of value and her life revolves around materialism. And that she is just living a surface level existence.

    • @purplelove3666
      @purplelove3666 3 месяца назад

      Good,would you be ok with splitting house chores with your wife?

  • @faiimilano
    @faiimilano 3 месяца назад

    Sis 👏🏾 allahuma barik I agree with 1000000 times
    I hope this video reach to a lot of sisters

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Baarak Allah feeki!

  • @alfellati
    @alfellati 3 месяца назад +1

    This is very helpful my sister. I find a lot of women do value themselves as their Mahr, which is wrong, they are worth much more as human beings and as daughters of others, but the Mahr is a legal quote for knotting the strings of marriage not for “buying” a wife. Thank you so much!

  • @HoorEidd
    @HoorEidd 4 месяца назад +1

    mashalah, nice job sister

  • @s7_wys
    @s7_wys 3 месяца назад +12

    Coming from a guy (19), I was about to marry a girl (18) I met last year at college. At first she showed her best side and personality to me, but then towards the end of the year she showed her true colours and her true colours were basically all the red flags mentioned in this video. It became a very toxic relationship and after making so much dua to Allah, he removed her from my life instead of persuing her for marriage. I know that when I am with my future wife who Inshallah will have the complete opposite traits, I will look back at my experience with her and think Allah saved me from basically a divorce.
    Im a good hearted guy but I will never marry a girl who wants to be treated like a queen. I wouldnt want to be treated like a king because I know marriage is a joint partnership and it works with effort coming from both sides. Your not marrying royalty, you are marrying another fellow slave of Allah. Put it into that perspective and learn to humble yourself because your primary goal as a couple should be getting closer to Allah in this dunya so he grants you the best Akhirah.
    Yes as a man, you should provide for her, care for her emotions and treat her well, because she will be the mother of your children, but she cant be a child herself. She cant still be a girl, she needs to be matured enough to be a woman.

    • @SS-cu8se
      @SS-cu8se 3 месяца назад +3

      This is why it’s important to take your time when getting to know someone. Glad you saw the signs before you signed on the dotted line!

    • @Mafrx
      @Mafrx 3 месяца назад +1

      I can completely relate to your experience, everything from the age to the duas exact same experience.
      Alhamdulilah we can only do better and look forward to the future

    • @s7_wys
      @s7_wys 3 месяца назад +1

      @@SS-cu8se Alhamdulillah because many don't. Allah saved me before it was too late and I will always believe he done so because he has written my name next to someone better.

    • @s7_wys
      @s7_wys 3 месяца назад +1

      @@Mafrx Yeah it happens alot nowadays which is why divorces are so common. Because people start showing their true colours. May Allah keep us away from those corrupt people and grant us all good, righteous spouses. Ameen.

  • @farzanasondhi7765
    @farzanasondhi7765 3 месяца назад +1

    Hey hey, Salam....wanted to say that you look gorgeous Mashallah and your discussion makes a lot of sense! Kudos to you....God Bless

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Wa alaikum asalam, thank you 🥹 that was sweet

  • @eshazeshan9354
    @eshazeshan9354 3 месяца назад +1

    I think these are all valid - as an eldest daughter, I am hyper independent but I know I want a partner who helps me trust and rely on him, so that I can be less stressed and more feminine. That balance is so important bc I don’t want to resent anyone bc I feel i have to do everything myself. I am self aware and want to change that.
    High Mehr is a good one bc at the end of the day everything that’s his is yours anyways. Princess treatment is different from entitlement and I think you touch on women who feel entitled to everything.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      This was a great clarifying comment! Eldest daughters definitely can experience hyperindependence by necessity of their role in the family. I have a video coming out after Ramadan about hyperindependence! Stay tuned isA

  • @choukriadan4706
    @choukriadan4706 23 дня назад

    I enjoy your voice ❤

  • @MasterBlasterBB
    @MasterBlasterBB 3 месяца назад +1

    Thank you sizter 🤲🧕🏻

  • @H1GHD3FF
    @H1GHD3FF 3 месяца назад +1

    Non muslim here. This is very good advice.

  • @sabaparveen81
    @sabaparveen81 2 месяца назад

    Assalaamu Ma’am do answer my question that I have shared with you. Jazak Allah

  • @Donotcare6
    @Donotcare6 4 месяца назад +2

    I really thought one of those videos who bashes Muslim men but alhamdulliah i was wrong big time. I think you have one new subscriber.

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +2

      JAK! I try to really not get into that stuff, it does no good. Accountability needs good character and hopefulness, not attacks and shaming constantly.

    • @ThatDudeDavid252
      @ThatDudeDavid252 4 месяца назад +1

      It says red flag in women just read

  • @Harlem2Detroit
    @Harlem2Detroit 3 месяца назад +1

    Got my answer ❤hello from your Somali neighbor ❤🎉

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад +1

      Haha salam!

  • @Frooqi786
    @Frooqi786 4 месяца назад +1

    Good advice for brothers

  • @oaktutor1154
    @oaktutor1154 3 месяца назад +1

    This was educational

  • @RaeKwon-Doe
    @RaeKwon-Doe 3 месяца назад +13

    I’ve had a situationship where I was talking with a “hot and cold” sister. Ended up really messing with my mental health and emotions. These kind of women are to be avoided

  • @tommyt8998
    @tommyt8998 2 месяца назад

    I'm a Catholic. I enjoyed this video, and most of this advice is just as relevant to us!

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  2 месяца назад

      Very cool!

  • @BintGumby
    @BintGumby 3 месяца назад +1

    Im glad we are hearing it from a woman

  • @justmusic3441
    @justmusic3441 3 месяца назад

    As a man dating muslim ladies. This video has helped me alot❤

  • @powerofpressure
    @powerofpressure 3 месяца назад

    keep on at it sister , our muslim women need a wake up call to reality.

  • @steveL2456
    @steveL2456 3 месяца назад +1

    I am not a muslim but I love your pointers!!

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  3 месяца назад

      Thank you!

  • @Qishqildaq
    @Qishqildaq 3 месяца назад +1

    Thank you sister!!!!!
    Very useful video!!!!!
    After reverting, we idolising, fantasising Muslim women...
    At the end, the reality is they are still the same... women....
    With the specific details, and effects, and yet... the basics, the common ground is the same...
    Must accept the reality I guess....

  • @Muizz_Gamer_
    @Muizz_Gamer_ 4 месяца назад +33

    Major red flag - girl not taking deen seriously

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +7

      For both for sure! But it's probably in my opiniopn the EASIEST one to fix, we have so many resources alhamdulillah

    • @copainspammeur404
      @copainspammeur404 4 месяца назад +4

      ​@@alasryhNot if the willingness isn't there

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +1

      @@copainspammeur404 for sure!

  • @abbashyder2803
    @abbashyder2803 4 месяца назад +1

    you are literally the female version of faiyad fit 😂😂, Great video though, congrats on 2k subs! ♥

    • @alasryh
      @alasryh  4 месяца назад +2

      Baarak Allah feek, it was a lot of work for the 2k subs but alhamdulilah. I've seen his videos and appreciate his approach, very calm and focused which is different from the overly emotional and adab-less talk we see on the internet.

  • @sophiafarooqui4256
    @sophiafarooqui4256 4 месяца назад

    I love your videos