As a man I will say this lady truly have one of the best channels for women..I been passing her work around and posting it on social media ..she taking women to school out here!💯
My best friend was being bullied at work when we were in our 20s. I got the idea of indirectly letting her boss believe she was documenting her behavior. I took out some books from the library about workplace bullying, bought a notebook and told her to sit them on her desk where people can see.....the bullying magically stopped on it's own. LOL
Something I learned in cotillion is to look the person directly in the eye, say “your behavior is completely inappropriate,” and walk away. We were taught to say this instead of cussing the person out. 🤣 It always catches them off guard because they expect you to get emotional and you don’t give them the satisfaction.
I will never forget this nurse I worked with who would ask me questions at the nurses station and mock me after I’d answer her questions, causing everyone to laugh. Of course it didn’t take long for me to realize she was just jealous that I, 23 at the time, cute and feminine, was living a great life while she, all haggard, had to sit back and watch. I started to ignore her and her little hen friends. I made my money and kept it pushin!
Luckily the nurses i work with in my unit are all young and generally very nice and supportive.The older women all just fall in line because they know they’re the odd ones out.
i had the same thing happen but she was making fun of me because my nails were done, then i got to know her turns out she was closeted and tryna figure things out for herself SMH.
I was bullied at my workplace because I wore feminine clothes, makeup and nice jewelry to work. My fiancé also sent me flowers every week so that made me a target for the miserable and toxic females at work. I left that company once my great opportunity came along. I lasted less than 6 months. That company is now closed 💅🏾 #checkmate
Most workplace bullies will come for you for two reasons: they are envious of you, or they lack self-esteem. In my experience it was a combination of both. I always took the high road, kept it sweet and continued to do my work to a high standard. Office politics is one of the main reasons I prefer to continue working from home, ain’t got the time for masculina mind games...
*"Oh I see you care about your appearance" "oh who are you trying to impress? "oh you must be too good for us". Ladies please take these words as encouragement because, that means you are dressing feminine. It's intimidating when you come in and basically challenge their whole mindset. I can say every job I've worked at, once I come in , all of a sudden skirts, lipstick & makeup appears.*
My female coworkers never compliment me because I’m the only one who dresses feminine. Yet customers and male coworkers are always rushing to help me and compliment me. I pay them dust and mind the feminine business that pays me.
Do you compliment them for anything? Them not complementing you for dressing feminine is no reason to vilify them. Sometimes its good to look inside ourselves before we look outside
@@sophisticatedmm3632 oh wow am In healthcare field as well, looking to leave bedside for work from home. what is the title of the job you do from home please
@@munarellatv I work as an Enrollment Processor, but there's alot of RN jobs & clinical case manager positions as well, you just have to research different insurance companies for the state/ city that you live in.
The best thing I did was practice taking the high road because people purposefully push you to the edge just to turn around and play the victim when you react. The biggest mistake you can make is assuming there is maturity in coporate settings because there are adults there!
This happened to me as well in my early 20s. If your feminine it's not your fault you get easier work, better treatment and promotions from male bosses. Your not at the work place to find a bff, stay feminine get your money and ignore masculinas let their jealousy choke them.
I am a nurse which is already a feminine profession ; however, Masculinas drive the ship in most facilities. I returned to work just recently. I trigger eveyone when I come in with my pretty in pink uniform. I had a manager who I had to check in week one. She got my cell phone number and attempted to text me on my days off about things that could be addressed the next day. Well, I just found out as they were escorting her out the door, she was plotting on me. Ladies and Lurkers, the lesson for the day, "the hole you dig for someone else the hole you will fall in"!
It's terrible. I found out yesterday from my co worker that my bully supervisor has been trying to recruit him to be mean to me as well. People are sick out there.
Years ago I was working for the state I live in and I was next up for a future promotion. The young lady who was hired after me was spreading a false narrative about me and I had no clue! I really never spoke to her so she created stories. Eventually SHE got the position and became toxic with our other coworkers. One elder on our job was so damaged, she transferred to another office. Eventually I resigned, in a very careful way, just in case I needed to return one day. The workload in my department shifted on her! Her deceitful behavior unraveled and EVERYTHING came to light! I was told by a person who still worked there the entire story. This young lady quit not long after I left. 👏🏿
Ive been bullied So bad that I didnt even Know I was pretty until i was in college. I've never really academically excelled, never been the most popular, never been rude, and always humble. So I was always confused about Why they despised ME. I'm currently unemployed by choice as my boyfriend takes care of me financially not even letting me pay for so much as Gas because I would come back from my all-female job crying about the way they treated me. I'm only 23 I want to work again, but I dont want to bring that energy back to my mans house. This video is here for a reason
Yes, be familiar with HR and they are definitely a place to report harassment. (And you MUST report it to someone in the company if you want it to be addressed) BUTTTT please realize that HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND. Before you go to HR Have your ducks in a row, it is not a therapy session. Also, remember HR WORKS FOR THE COMPANY so that means they have to do what is best for the company. You always have the option to file a complaint with your state or federal EEOC.
Sadly there was no HR at the job I was told that’s actually a good thing ( idk how) but my male coworker had that bully on recording since somebody recorded his conversation plus she was bully him because he was gay so now he’s in the process of suing them and looks like he’s winning we both no long work there by the way and people keep quitting left and right
@@stellakamau6994 Yes! Same with me but I would quickly report they arse and it would quickly stop…I used to go straight to upper level management …I have been working from home now for several years resting in my divine feminine 💅🏽💕
I’ve been a Nurse for 37 years. I’ve found some female Nurses to be out and out mean, bullies, passively and directly aggressive, discouraging to new the Nurse, perpetuates discontent, and discouraging. I have left Nursing full time because the workplace has become so toxic. You’d think that those of us that have the privilege of caring for other human beings would be cohesive and supportive of others of the profession. I’ve observed that intelligent people read and talk about ideas, less than intelligent people talk about things, and non intelligent people talk about people. Most people fall into one of the 3. Bullies talk about people constantly. I now mind the hypergamous business that pays me by reading and resting in my soft femininity. Thank you Chloe, I’m glad I found you even at my current age. Never stop learning . Never stop teaching.
@@sonyab2u974 , I am so happy that you have gotten out of the daily grind. I have been looking for something to do from home because I have an hour commute both ways for my job. I have been an ICU nurse for the last 13 years with a total of 25 years as an RN. I want to work from home badly. Do you have any suggestions?
When I was 18 I did makeup at a booth in the mall.The manager was in her 30s she was ruthless and narcissistic.She would come into work with an attitude and she would orchestrate and triangulate with all the girls who worked there.I feel like working there really took me from a girl to a woman.Around that age I had no idea about femininity and what it was .But anyway I’m 25 now and I’m extremely more assertive than I was at 18 so I feel like it comes with time.😌I do not let ppl walk all over me like a doormat now idc how girly I appear to be.
A year ago, I worked with 3 loud ghetto ratched young women !! It was so embarrassing to the point I hated going to work !! Fortunately, I only had to deal with this for 2 months !! As soon as an opportunity opened up, I applied and got the new position !! and never looked back !! Thank you Chole for this informative video !!
Always act like a lady. Make your anger and frustration expensive. Remember that we're at work to make money, meet some people, get things done, and nothing more. Being overly emotional is unladylike AND unprofessional. Just think, what would a woman focused on herself and hypergamy do in my situation?
@@SpirituallyAbstract when you give your attention (energy) to someone, no matter the level of attention, high or low vibrational, the other person is the receiver of your energy therefore think about what did they give you first for you to give them your energy/attention. Before responding to a bully, ask yourself do they deserve your attention (your energy is expensive). They go low, we go high…Michelle Obama😉👑💎⭐️💅🏾 Don’t be afraid to go to HR if your silence doesn’t work and or leave for a better working environment.
Living this now…I started my level up journey after leaving an abusive ex while at my current job. I still work with two of the women he cheated on me with. Despite my inner turmoil, I was sure not to look it! I didn’t want to look how I felt because that’s what they and my ex wanted-to ruin me. Yes, they flat out said this. They mocked and gaslighted me relentlessly and it started to really get to me…but some new friends snapped me out of it! So, I dressed nicer, worked out more consistently, networked, and improved my diet. I’m now their superior, which has opened up many possibilities both in and outside the company. I don’t engage with them outside of basic courtesy and when required and they don’t affect my overall work experience, like they hoped. Long before my promotion, I informed both of them that communication between us would be work-related only. Since then, they’ve resorted to brown nosing, nice-nasty and some gaslighting again, since they’re desperate to get to me. I remain neutral. After all my hard work, I just can’t associate with trash. 🚮 🤣
Be careful when going to HR, especially if your manager is the problem, usually the managers and HR are good friends and HR will try to protect the higher ups.
I usually converse with a few and avoid the personalities that come off as hostile to me or those that try to present themselves as “being better than me”
I have experienced work place bullies through a number of employers. Sadly, these bullies were women in leadership roles. HR was not very supportive in resolving these issues. As a result, my solution for toxic work environments is to search for another job immediately. I value my peace of mind and will not tolerate a toxic work environment.
I had to tell a coworker recently that her behavior was inappropriate and I would report her if she did it again. She hasn't gotten outta line since and it felt so good to nip it in the bud immediately. Your videos have taught me not to let misbehavior fester and grow. Thanks again Chloe 🤎
I am one of those girls who was groomed to be kind and passive. I have no boundaries but I am working on it. It sucks when people know you do not have boundaries because they will walk all over you any chance they get. They know what they are doing; some stop when they see what they are doing, but others do not mind doing this. Im learning that its my job to set boundaries and tell people when something makes me uncomfortable. Thanks Chloe.
Chloe is a blessing! What I have learned: Make allies quickly! Talk to everyone initially, keep a work journal of incidents, be nimble and ready to apply to new jobs if things should go left before your workload gets too heavy.
What I do is go to Glassdoor and leave a review detailing the behavior of the building. If the CEO is not in the building he/she will be in there soon.
This came right on time. Just got a job and the masculinas that were rude are now trying to be my friends and want to hang out. They men bash all day and expect me to jump in. I’m the most feminine woman there, nails done, hair done, makeup, etc and I was almost feeling down about myself and like I was being “extra”. Chloe, you are so right about having a dating life outside of work also, I found that having someone to look forward to is a great thing
A friend of mine shared this and I am glad I watched it. I really didn’t understand how deeply affected I was by work place bullying until I listened to this. I may have even blamed myself. Just wow, thanks for sharing. I need to work on this.
Omg your always so relevant. I work in a field dominated by females. I was just telling a colleague I never met a female in which I would say I don’t like or have an attitude towards them. I’m always monitoring my energy staying positive and happy. I’ve heard people say they don’t like me just because I walk around smiling, giddy and happy. I’m ever so thankful everyday and if it’s a bad day I make the best of it. My manager and director constantly praise me for my attitude. So many of my coworkers are angry and mad females. They’re mad at a ‘man’ some even mad at the CREATOR. This video is well needed. This topic is often unheard of unspoken or overlooked Thank you kindly,
I am going through a hard time being a subordinate of this woman together with the manager. They are beyond sick and the worst part is that there's no where to go since even "employee relations/HR" are all together in this bullying tactics. Obviously the only way out is to get a new job somewhere else. I like the advice of networking because really it would make it easier to get an even better job and work environment. Trying to make things right or acting nice is futile when it comes to these narcissists because not matter what, they will always find something "wrong" since they feed on drama and chaos. Anyway I'm grateful for this channel & I'm loving the feminine schooling❤ Wish me luck in finding a way better job & conducive work environment as soon as possible 🙏
I avoid and ignore workplace bullies. They can be miserable and jealous and will not want to see you happy at work and will start drama with you for any reason. I would just do my work and go home. Meet friends outside of work to talk to.
Chloe_ this is a ON. TIME. WORD! I recently put in my 2 week notice at a job full of masculinas. The work environment drained me among other things. The day I got into a argument with one of these women was my cue to leave! Not worth it! The hate be so real. I have moved on to a job where my femininity can flourish more. No job is worth my peace of mind.
Ive been bullied at every job Ive ever had and it is extremely Exhausting. It triggered by Depression and brought my Self Esteem down so badly that I thought of ending my Life. Ive only been kind and nice to everyone that Ive encountered so I was confused. It forced me out after 3 years with the company. But eventually Enough becomes Enough. This time around I'm going to HR and getting a Lawyer. #Evolution #GodsGrace
Yes Hollee! Also make as many allies as possible quickly so when they spread those rumors around about you, it will be harder to stick! Masculinas hate beautiful secure women.
And many companies have policies that go beyond what is outlined legally and ban bullying in general as long as it is done consistently and without discrimination. This is why it is critical to have a competent HR department and to document all that you have experienced.
@@tashamack5120 Right. However, in certian workplaces HR are incompetent some are even friends with the builles. Enmode is also right workplace bullying is illegal to a person of a certian class. Also, one important thing what I learned was in my experience HR protects the corporation not a person.
@@ashlove7330 I agree with you and I actually work in HR 😩 But in my company, I am well known for playing devil's (employee) advocate and using actual logic and facts in a lot of situations. Oh well, maybe they'll lay me off one day lol...or I tell my husband-to-be that I'm done working for corporate America and putting in my notice.
@@ashlove7330 I'm sorry if you have had a bad experience with HR. I'm sure there are some HR personnel that show favoritism. I'm an HR Director and I can assure you that I'm nobody's friend. LOL. I mostly represent the Company but I am fair and consistent and will speak up when I believe the employee is right. But at the end of the day, the company's interest is what is most important because if there isn't a company, there are no jobs. That's why it's so very important to choose the company you work for like you would choose your husband. Find a company that aligns with your values and do the best you can. Wishing everyone on this thread much success and happiness.
I needed this desperately. I am a naturally friendly and understanding person. I'm the type to not like arguing and I prefer a calm mature approach to a solution rather than the dramatics because the aggressive confrontation stresses me out and I just mentally shut down. I don't understand why I can never attract the same peaceful energy. All my life I've always attracted rude coworkers who feel the need to be disrespectful and gossipy; constantly bring negativity. It's taken a toll on my self esteem because I know that I am more than competent in my workplace but the type of coworkers I attract are always bullies. It angers me and I can't stand it.
This video was so triggering for me. I’ve been in situations where I was harassed and bullied by multiple co-workers at my office but by the time I realized what was happening it was too late😢 I was forced to put in my 2week notice due to the ongoing harassment and bullying. Unfortunately it got so bad one Friday afternoon that I was forced to walk out before my two week notice was up! Thank God I’m stronger and I know better now!🙌🏾That could NEVER happen again
I just went through this for the first time in my career having to go to HR. It was not fun but my bully boss actually left me alone after that. I don't trust anyone. These people will take out their own misery and insecurity on you because they have power of "boss". Its the worst.
Great video Chloe, my former masculina unfortunately was my manager - huge, recently divorced toxic 'karen'. The entire company knew her reputation (including HR) and encouraged it. I knew my time was limited but my work was flawless and I had charmed the male senior managers which made her even more angry. This eventually helped me land a huge payout with extended benefits. On to the next...
I hate bullies that's why if anyone who is a Christian or Born again should always pray about your enemies everyday day and night for God to let vengeance be his. I guarantee you that supernatural things will start happening to your enemies, but do not rejoice when karma comes around for them always keep it moving.
I work from home, but when Chloe speaks I'm locked in! When I was going in to work, I was consistent in my femininity. Put effort into my appearance daily, and treated everyone pleasantly. Male co-workers went out of their way for me and the women (masculinas) HATED me. Smh. This video is so accurate, as always thanks Chloe for your words of wisdom ❤️
I had a guy and a girl at my work who tried me for no reason,And just before I could report them my husband ask me to married him and leave that job. Five years happily married with two kids just saying happy homemaker over here ☝🏿. Years later the guy apologized to me he said he was unhappy in his marriage and took it out others Very strange but! I accept his apology and moved on. The girl was Fired before I left I saw her at rooftop the other day very drunk. Great video thanks Chloe
Chloe, I needed this message years ago, it would've saved my health and career. I had no idea what to do. I ended up in the hospital suffering from high blood pressure and anxiety. The he-man woman and her crew of "wannabe loved" followers tried to destroy me for no reason at all. If I had this message it would've saved me some serious problems. I've been out of work for five years and I'm thinking of returning into the workforce in the coming months. I'm proud to say I got a new attitude and I'm armed with knowledge. I will not put up with the trash that I put up with from those masculine women. Never ever again will I let someone run me off a job. Thank you Chloe you don't know it but you saved my life. Thank you so very much.
Uh Chloe I messed up on Saturday I saw one of the women who used to work with me that turned out to be different than what I thought she was. Instead of paying her dust I told her "f u b". SMH. What makes it so bad is that I didn't even mean to say it out loud, it just happened. I seem to fail at running into people who I don't care for and telling them " f u" out in public. I'm working to get my masculine emotions in check.
I wish I had this video when I was at my last job pre-covid. It was always the elder masculina that would hate on me at various job for absolutely no reason and I would take it personally. Now I work for myself but your quote “bullying isn’t personal” really resonates with me.
I work in a office with nothing but women and learned you have to be grown woman and be respectful at all time .... I learned to be professional at all times because sometimes bad behavior happens when you become friends with co workers (gossip and rude behavior) SORRY HONEY YOU CLOCK IN AND OUT don’t deal with people like that!
Wow. Remember they jealous of you try to ignore those haters. I messed up before I diden tell the supervisor I was being harassed around promotion time. Let the bully get me upset. I should have told and walked away. Lesson learned. So report and make sure you take care of yourself. A back up plan is good.
It got so bad with my workplace bully that he even tried to recruit our colleagues to also be mean to me which he luckily didn't succeed at cause my co-workers said they had no issues with me and would not pretend they do.
My dear, I have experience this and it’s a tactic some lowlife men in leadership positions do... They will try to cause conflicts between you and your direct line manager or put pressure on your direct line manager to bully you. So, you’ll run to them for support and I’m the process manipulate you out of your boundaries. When they’re real gutter people that you’d not even involve yourself with outside of work.x
@@user-of9bx1uk3u thank you for that enlightenment. It was so traumatising that someone who doesn't even know me could hate me to that extent and put so much effort and time into making sure that my time at work would be as miserable as possible.
All of these tips will work wonders! But the main key is getting in front of the issue and being firm with your boundaries. Every thing said in this video rings true and don’t think your issue is small. You are important and you deserve nothing but good vibes.
Everything you said is so true. Especially the importance of documentation beats the hearsay doesn’t look professional. It can also backfire and make one look incompetent when we have it in our head and not on paper. I will be using some of these awesome strategies. Thanks
Wow Chloe, this came RIGHT ON TIME. This past week had not been great at the workplace for me....because I choose to stay out of messy behaviors, I am cast out of the island. Smh. I keep telling myself to be thankful that I the outkast. I absolutely love every advice and suggestion you shared. I will definitely be applying them. Thank you Chloe.
Thank you Chloe. This video is for me. I struggled for many years with just miserable, catty, gossiping women. For years I kept up kindnrss and people pleasing behaviors only to be more and more disrespected. I'm moving out of state (going no contact) and will do better for myself moving forward.
I haven’t even watched it and I KNOW I need this video. My supervisor loves to throw backhanded compliments my way now that I dress more feminine daily. Asked me if I had a wedding to go to not too long ago 🤷🏽♀️🙄 My boss gives employees the silent treatment when we use our days off 🤦🏾♀️ I love the job but dealing with these humans is DRAINING my soul.
I was training for a new job, this was the first week mind you. One particular woman kept coming up to me fussing at me every day. I told my trainer she had one more time to come to me and I’m making a harassment complaint. Never had issues with her ever again.
Am introverted and with strong personality and I have never been bullied reason been I walk alone, I distance myself,I don't worship friends meaning I can do without friends, I don't befriend my koligs I take them as workmates period I don't even hang out with them am just me......
Chloe_ you don’t know how I needed this video. I mind my business at work but I still had a rumor spread around the office that I was dating a male colleague, which wasn’t true. When the gossip got to the point were the office bully started talking about my male colleague and were “kissing” and other things in the office, I went to my Supervisor. I’m not playing with my reputation when everything that bully was saying was not true. 3 years later I can see the light at the end of the tunnel b/c a new job opportunity has came along. Again thanks for this video!!!!
My current work place is extremely toxic, the other day a lady shouted at me saying I should shut up she is talking, I was shocked, laughed ot off but it deeply affected me it was not just that day many different days, we work in a professional setting so I expect all of us should be but nop
I was teased at my current job for having boundaries about my mandated break and lunch time. I have an alarm set for those so that I wont miss them. They get upset when I refuse to eat in the office or tell someone to come back at a certain time (after break time). I just make sure I stay true to myself because I dont need this job…but they do.
I'm 25 and very feminine than majority of the women I work with. I've been being bullied a lot at work by some of these women including my supervisor. I know they are jealous of me and they've tried to get me fired countless amount of times but I've manage to keep my cool but i'm running out of patience and its starting to make me miserable like them and I dont want that for myself. Thank you so much for making this video I needed this advice right now.
Jesus I so needed this video about 5 years ago. I have so much to say on this topic but I am going to try to keep it short. I work in a toxic environment it has been so bad but since the pandemic I have been working at home and it has been a slight relief of not being in this building. I have go back to the building in September and I am terrified I am trying to look for another job. The women that I worked around has bern so intimidated by me that I had to interview for a position 14 times because they didn't want me to succeed and it was a game for them. I mean the poison went as high up and in so many circles. It was so bad I didn't want to get my hair and nails done or wear a new outfit because these woman would notice everything snd talk about me. I was turned into the office bitch because I was to nice and very feminine. I sorry about how long this is and I could go on but it took me very long time to learn to be assertive and I am still learning. But I am very afraid of going past assertive and becoming a bitch and it can get really nasty. Why are so many of our black women have that crabs in a barrel personality. I hate it I was never raised like that I have a Caribbean background and I have been raised to uplift one another because Sis if you make it then we have made it.
This is the reason I left nursing and I now work in the medical lab where ppl mind their own business. Sadly i find that an all-female workplace(with female bosses) is the grave for a femenine woman. Also, if management is male, i find that there is less foolishnezs that occurs. Female bosses=havoc and emotionalism) Worse, after u finish each shift of work, u bring tht negative energy back home. It aint worth it!!! It realy aint worth it girlz💕💕💕
Chloe you don’t know how much this was needed. I just had situations this week. I just kill them with kindness and keep it to a minimum. I seem to keep having this issue with older women in the workplace.
Yes I am experiencing a colleague(woman) that always trying to gaslight me by calling me by another name and it irritates my soul!!! I always correct her though and she just laughs it off which is annoying. One day I went to her department which has 3 other people(2 women and a man) there and she asked me right in front of them why I always let the men at my job drool over me with my body and clothes(I have a hourglass figure), mind you I never talk to these men unless I have to. One time she asked me why I wear thongs underneath my skirt......like huh????? Why was she even looking at my ass???? I get so annoyed with her! And she always gives me side eyes like I did something to her, but like you said chloe_ kill them with kindness and that's what I always do, I never get out of character but from now on I will ignore her antics.
Report her. The “thong” comments and body shaming is enough for you to bring to HR. It’s unacceptable and it creates a hostile work environment. I’m sorry that you’re going through this.
I was bullied at a job that I worked at for 7 years. My manager was very inappropriate and nasty towards. One day I couldn’t take it anymore and confronted her. She denied everything and laughed it off. She was nice for a little after, but things went back to how they were. I quit shortly after and now I’m in a healthier work environment and making more many. 💅🏽💁🏽♀️
Thank you so much for this I've been dealing with this for God knows how long I just turned 26 and I now understand I definitely have to assert myself more people look at me and see me as this native person because I literally get told I look 12 on a daily I've lost so many jobs because of this thank you Chole.
Chloe my love. You are always on time. I just started a new job six days ago and have been dealing with a work place bully each day I've gone into work. The company's philosophy is litterally making the environment a pleasant and fun place to be, and most people who work there are pretty great so far, it's a real team environment, except for this one Masculina. She was kinda pleasant the first day, however everyday after that she's been extremely horrible to me and a couple others co workers. This video came right on time and helped to give me some extra tips on how to deal with this situation. Thank you so much 💜
I am dealing with a masculina bully manager who is causing a lot of havoc for me at my work...this week it has intensified because I have begun to put bounderies...today I'm seeing her after working remotely for a week (which has helped a lot)...I was just wondering how I was going go deal with her while scrolling on my phone and that's when I came across your RUclips....thank you so much for taking the time to help so many women out there...you are a God send
This video was EXCELLENT. Serving women and children as a nurse and health educator is my heart and passion and I have excelled through the years getting all types of promotions, awards, raises, leveling up, and thanking my mentors and nurse leaders who invested in me and guided me along the way. I endured two HORRIBLE cases of bullying in my career and I’m thankful I overcame them both. #LessonsLearned
Yes A work place nightmare Walmart in San Antonio, Tx I was a customer host. I could drop names but no need for that. I did not know how to handle this. There was few African Americans in the whole store. The job payed very well. From the first day the management began dragging me in the office. Each manager one at a time writing me up. I was so frustrated. I was fired after many attacks and they refused to give me unemployment. Plus suspended me for 6 months. I still do not know why. I have tried to work at other Walmart stores here but they communicate back and fourth. Anyway. This place is horrible with diversity and Inclusion. I am still unemployed but I have been trying. They mentality here is really something. I am working on a plan to relocate our of Texas. I would love to turn this whole situation around. In a positive manor. Thank you Chloe_
Omggg so needed previously struggled with covert narcissist mother and grandmother and long term narc jealous besties now dealing with work environment it's like we have no peace. Please make more videos on this topic.
The truth!!! My last experience with this was such hell three years ago lol. While I was still a bit unhealed and extremely defensive because I had always been attacked by females in the workplace, I am very petite but was always very ladylike and dainty and naturally, the men were drawn to me. They would always tell the other ladies etc and when I just started there they would all try to buy me breakfast/lunch, asking me out, leaving me secret notes and flowers, brought me snacks etc. Believe you meeeeeeeeeeeeee they HATED that even more. At that time, I showed myself to not be weak so I had a bit of aggressive assertiveness lol when they began bullying me and I had my back against a wall- it was intenseeeeeeeee. The environment was indeed very toxic and the morale was extremelyyyyyyyyyy low. Man, I felt sick going to work every day eventually but I did notice that many of them began dressing like me which was cute to see lol. They even complained that I brushed my teeth after having lunch🤣🤣. I was told later on that they referred to me as "Little bitch" lolol. Admittedly, even though I knew that they did what they did because they were miserable, I still got drawn into the nonsense a bit. All I wanted to do was my job; they ganged up, lied, called the higher-ups on me because I spoke to them a bit harshly AFTER they were extremely rude to me and refused to complete tasks I had assigned to them. There was also no one to report it to-the environment was very toxic and dysfunctional. Imagine having to sit through parties that they're throwing and not inviting you and being provoked about it. It was intenseeeeeee! This would have been very helpful at that time for me, surely, but you'd be surprised the levels these demonic entities would go and sometimes it can feel like a whirlwind especially when the structure of the organization is very dysfunctional. Give yourself room to forgive yourself and others, learn from it and keep that feminine charm on point!!!
@@user-of9bx1uk3u Hahahahahahahahah, if you're in the Caribbean then perhaps hahahahhaha!!! These entities thrive anywhere! They're legit like weeds, popping up everywhere! Thankfully we know how to pluck them out effectively lol
Just started a new job at a early childhood center and as you know it’s predominantly women. And I’m the only black woman there. I mind my business and as always, there’s a woman of no color that has an issue with me. I wear my makeup, I dress professionally casually cute. All the women there wear dirty jeans or sweatpants and baggy cardigans. I know we work with small kids but damn. I watch this channel to remind me not to take it personally and keep minding my feminine business. The kids like me and the boss does and that’s all that matters.
Very valuable information! I had an abusive ex-supervisor at one point in my life and without knowing it I killed them with kindness!!! They were micro-managing me so much and when she brought up everything I was doing “wrong” I told them “Thank you so much for that! I understand that everything you are telling me is helping me become the best employee I can be. I will continue to integrate everything you have taught me, this is all very valuable information.” & Most importantly - I wasn’t sarcastic. I kept it sincere! Because I honestly didn’t know how else to rationalize them being so rude to me 💀 Thank God I am no longer under their leadership!
So amazing that this video came up on my feed. I needed to see it because every job I work at has workplace bullies who keep bothering me. I’m literally a few days in at a new job and already getting bullied by someone who is supposed to help train me. So I will definitely listen to the tips from this video.
Chloe, you have taught me more in this 16 min video than multiple therapy sessions I've taken in the past (not to knock therapy, it just wasn't for me). Thank you so much!
I’m reading through the comments and the common theme I see is women bullying women! This is scary. I already know men can be inappropriate, but the viciousness from your female counterparts is mind boggling. Why do we continue to be each other’s enemy? We need a conversation!
Actually!!! Sadly I quit a job that was like that and even 2 of the guys that worked at my job were super nice! One quit because of a better job and the other one quit because he was also being bullied because he was gay 🤦🏽♀️
I've dealt with workplace bullies and learned valuable lessons. I'm blessed to be in a healthier environment but will keep those phrases at the end in my back pocket. Inevitably, new level, new devil.
What timing Chloe. As we speak! This woman who had been harassing me since 2016. Has now ended up in the department I am in now. Yes, 2016 because the men managers didn’t want to deal with it. I even moved my seat. Good thing I have let the management here know what transpired and we are still working from home. Like you stated, they were like that way before you experience the negativity.
When I worked in the fashion industry I was bullied by a lot of women. They had to their own cliques, ostracised me, laughed behind my back. Purposely wouldn't give me any work so I looked bad in front of my manager. I went home crying everyday. 😢
THIS was weeeeelllllll needed for feminine women such as my self that work in corporate and CONSTANTLY has a target on her back as early as the interview stage! 🙄🙄
You're so right about all if this. Dealing with a racist nurse manager right now for the past 3 years. Its a man, although he says he has a wife has very effeminate mannerisms and speech. I am very feminine, and wear dresses all the time. I smile and am pleasant to everyone. I am also the only black nurse. He has hired and I haven't anyone that wasnt white be hired. I get the worst feeling of negative energy and anxiety whenever hes near. Its hard because for the most part I like my co workers. And Im great at and comfortable with my job. Its hard to decide what to do.
As a man I will say this lady truly have one of the best channels for women..I been passing her work around and posting it on social media ..she taking women to school out here!💯
Thank you
She truly is teaching us woman what we should have been taught but weren’t she is extremely insightful
This video is excellent for young Black professional women just starting out.
My best friend was being bullied at work when we were in our 20s. I got the idea of indirectly letting her boss believe she was documenting her behavior. I took out some books from the library about workplace bullying, bought a notebook and told her to sit them on her desk where people can see.....the bullying magically stopped on it's own. LOL
Most bullies are cowards. Let them know you're onto them, and they back off.
Genius!!
Something I learned in cotillion is to look the person directly in the eye, say “your behavior is completely inappropriate,” and walk away. We were taught to say this instead of cussing the person out. 🤣 It always catches them off guard because they expect you to get emotional and you don’t give them the satisfaction.
I love this🤣
I gotta remember that one I had my workplace bully deported back to honduras
Love this! It prevents an argument and gets straight to the point.
Omg!! This is amazing!! I will be using it!!
@@pianotnt lol - let her go bully her Honduran coworkers.
I pray all us feminine women break free from the bondage of a 9-5 hostile working environment! 😩
Amen! Amen! And Amen! 🙌🏽
Amen
Amen!!! I can’t wait to FINALLY become a suburban trophy housewife in the near future 🙏🏽💁🏽♀️
🙏🙏🙏🙏
Amen
I will never forget this nurse I worked with who would ask me questions at the nurses station and mock me after I’d answer her questions, causing everyone to laugh. Of course it didn’t take long for me to realize she was just jealous that I, 23 at the time, cute and feminine, was living a great life while she, all haggard, had to sit back and watch. I started to ignore her and her little hen friends. I made my money and kept it pushin!
So sad!!!
Luckily the nurses i work with in my unit are all young and generally very nice and supportive.The older women all just fall in line because they know they’re the odd ones out.
"Nurses eat their young.... " we all know that expression and why it was made.
i had the same thing happen but she was making fun of me because my nails were done, then i got to know her turns out she was closeted and tryna figure things out for herself SMH.
That’s great!!!
I was bullied at my workplace because I wore feminine clothes, makeup and nice jewelry to work. My fiancé also sent me flowers every week so that made me a target for the miserable and toxic females at work. I left that company once my great opportunity came along. I lasted less than 6 months. That company is now closed 💅🏾 #checkmate
I love happy endings !
🙌🏾🙌🏾
We love to see it!
Yes!💅🏽💕
Yes , chica play chess 💅🏾 always.
Most workplace bullies will come for you for two reasons: they are envious of you, or they lack self-esteem. In my experience it was a combination of both. I always took the high road, kept it sweet and continued to do my work to a high standard. Office politics is one of the main reasons I prefer to continue working from home, ain’t got the time for masculina mind games...
Spot on!x
I’m an RN of over 14 years and been working from home for 5 years and I love it! Best thing I could’ve done for myself💕
It's always the fat dumpy ones who have an axe to grind.....never the hot ones with a good attitude.
I agree with you 100%
*"Oh I see you care about your appearance" "oh who are you trying to impress? "oh you must be too good for us". Ladies please take these words as encouragement because, that means you are dressing feminine. It's intimidating when you come in and basically challenge their whole mindset. I can say every job I've worked at, once I come in , all of a sudden skirts, lipstick & makeup appears.*
Lol yep
And I love to see it. We influential, ain’t we? 😅
My female coworkers never compliment me because I’m the only one who dresses feminine. Yet customers and male coworkers are always rushing to help me and compliment me. I pay them dust and mind the feminine business that pays me.
Ahhh the silent envy.
Bloop! Yes, beautiful 💅🏽💕
Do you compliment them for anything? Them not complementing you for dressing feminine is no reason to vilify them. Sometimes its good to look inside ourselves before we look outside
💗
Maybe they don’t care what you’re wearing
I work from home. Although it is still work I love not having to commute and be around coworkers.
Same it’s so much peaceful!
@Star 777
I work remotely for a healthcare company doing clerical/ admin work
My sentiments exactly!! Working from home full time has been a blessing in disguise and I pray we never return back to the office like before.x
@@sophisticatedmm3632 oh wow am In healthcare field as well, looking to leave bedside for work from home. what is the title of the job you do from home please
@@munarellatv
I work as an Enrollment Processor, but there's alot of RN jobs & clinical case manager positions as well, you just have to research different insurance companies for the state/ city that you live in.
I had handed in my resignation letter on pay day from a toxic job. Currently, I'm freelancing while up Skilling myself and my soul is at peace.
YAY congratulations
So happy for you.
🙏🏽💕
Congrats, I am so happy for you. I 🙏 on my way to freedom from working job.
One thing to remember is that HR is NEVER your friend!
It is better to find somewhere else to work.
The best thing I did was practice taking the high road because people purposefully push you to the edge just to turn around and play the victim when you react.
The biggest mistake you can make is assuming there is maturity in coporate settings because there are adults there!
That last section whhhhhew 🙌🏾🙌🏾
I had to learn this lesson quick, some work place environments are reminiscent of High School.
Absolutely agree! Where have you been? Hope you doing good, I've always liked your comments.
I always love your comments, ms. X! I hope you’re having a great 2021.
@@ThatGirlSince97 thank you so much ❤
This happened to me as well in my early 20s. If your feminine it's not your fault you get easier work, better treatment and promotions from male bosses. Your not at the work place to find a bff, stay feminine get your money and ignore masculinas let their jealousy choke them.
My mind set since I started this new job.....
amen
I am a nurse which is already a feminine profession ; however, Masculinas drive the ship in most facilities. I returned to work just recently. I trigger eveyone when I come in with my pretty in pink uniform. I had a manager who I had to check in week one. She got my cell phone number and attempted to text me on my days off about things that could be addressed the next day. Well, I just found out as they were escorting her out the door, she was plotting on me. Ladies and Lurkers, the lesson for the day, "the hole you dig for someone else the hole you will fall in"!
This is why I try not to make friends or get to chummy with colleagues
It's terrible. I found out yesterday from my co worker that my bully supervisor has been trying to recruit him to be mean to me as well. People are sick out there.
@@omphilemoerane2569
I understand I have a petty supervisor as well. Luckily I work remotely & don't have to see colleagues face to face
@@omphilemoerane2569 Very very sick my dear!x
@@sophisticatedmm3632 yes you're VERY lucky. I wish I could work from home.
Yes my boss kept writing me up so I couldn’t get a promotion. So I applied elsewhere and got the raise I wanted.
Years ago I was working for the state I live in and I was next up for a future promotion. The young lady who was hired after me was spreading a false narrative about me and I had no clue! I really never spoke to her so she created stories. Eventually SHE got the position and became toxic with our other coworkers. One elder on our job was so damaged, she transferred to another office. Eventually I resigned, in a very careful way, just in case I needed to return one day. The workload in my department shifted on her! Her deceitful behavior unraveled and EVERYTHING came to light! I was told by a person who still worked there the entire story. This young lady quit not long after I left. 👏🏿
Yay. Bully got karma
God don't like Ugly people's enemies will reap what they sow. 🙏🏾
Yep karma.
@@BlackEnchantress
I've seen it numerous times. A guy that was harassing me a few years ago on a previous job got laid off several months after I left
Ive been bullied So bad that I didnt even Know I was pretty until i was in college. I've never really academically excelled, never been the most popular, never been rude, and always humble. So I was always confused about Why they despised ME. I'm currently unemployed by choice as my boyfriend takes care of me financially not even letting me pay for so much as Gas because I would come back from my all-female job crying about the way they treated me. I'm only 23 I want to work again, but I dont want to bring that energy back to my mans house. This video is here for a reason
Try to look for a permanent remote job
Yes, be familiar with HR and they are definitely a place to report harassment. (And you MUST report it to someone in the company if you want it to be addressed) BUTTTT please realize that HR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND. Before you go to HR Have your ducks in a row, it is not a therapy session. Also, remember HR WORKS FOR THE COMPANY so that means they have to do what is best for the company. You always have the option to file a complaint with your state or federal EEOC.
All facts!
Sadly there was no HR at the job I was told that’s actually a good thing ( idk how) but my male coworker had that bully on recording since somebody recorded his conversation plus she was bully him because he was gay so now he’s in the process of suing them and looks like he’s winning we both no long work there by the way and people keep quitting left and right
I’ve been bullied at pretty much every job I’ve ever had 😬
Youth and beauty triggers work place bullies
Same, just keep your feminine energy. Don't lose control of emotions they will use them against you. Always play chess with your anger.
@@lenebrantley221 They are the worst. Beware of a beckipickmisha or a Karen.
@@stellakamau6994 Yes! Same with me but I would quickly report they arse and it would quickly stop…I used to go straight to upper level management …I have been working from home now for several years resting in my divine feminine 💅🏽💕
girl you are so gorgeous omg🥺🥺 that’s why they hating, girl don’t pay them any mind and get your bag and protect you feminine peace!✨❤️💅🏾
I’ve been a Nurse for 37 years. I’ve found some female Nurses to be out and out mean, bullies, passively and directly aggressive, discouraging to new the Nurse, perpetuates discontent, and discouraging. I have left Nursing full time because the workplace has become so toxic. You’d think that those of us that have the privilege of caring for other human beings would be cohesive and supportive of others of the profession. I’ve observed that intelligent people read and talk about ideas, less than intelligent people talk about things, and non intelligent people talk about people. Most people fall into one of the 3. Bullies talk about people constantly. I now mind the hypergamous business that pays me by reading and resting in my soft femininity. Thank you Chloe, I’m glad I found you even at my current age. Never stop learning . Never stop teaching.
I appreciate your observation on intelligence and completely agree.
I agree with all of the above! Been RN for 14 years now and working from home the past 5years resting in my divine feminine 💅🏽💕
@@sonyab2u974 , I am so happy that you have gotten out of the daily grind. I have been looking for something to do from home because I have an hour commute both ways for my job. I have been an ICU nurse for the last 13 years with a total of 25 years as an RN. I want to work from home badly. Do you have any suggestions?
@@cheririch4816 you could definitely work remotely as a nurse for a telehealth company
When I was 18 I did makeup at a booth in the mall.The manager was in her 30s she was ruthless and narcissistic.She would come into work with an attitude and she would orchestrate and triangulate with all the girls who worked there.I feel like working there really took me from a girl to a woman.Around that age I had no idea about femininity and what it was .But anyway I’m 25 now and I’m extremely more assertive than I was at 18 so I feel like it comes with time.😌I do not let ppl walk all over me like a doormat now idc how girly I appear to be.
A year ago, I worked with 3 loud ghetto ratched young women !! It was so embarrassing to the point I hated going to work !! Fortunately, I only had to deal with this for 2 months !! As soon as an opportunity opened up, I applied and got the new position !! and never looked back !! Thank you Chole for this informative video !!
YAY hi five. I can't stand working around obnoxious colleagues
Always act like a lady. Make your anger and frustration expensive. Remember that we're at work to make money, meet some people, get things done, and nothing more. Being overly emotional is unladylike AND unprofessional. Just think, what would a woman focused on herself and hypergamy do in my situation?
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Yessss to this👏🏾 My main thing has always been “I’m here to make money”. I refuse to let any one block me from receiving blessings.
How do you make your anger expensive in a work setting? I’m not sure that i totally understand this
@@SpirituallyAbstract me too !!
@@SpirituallyAbstract when you give your attention (energy) to someone, no matter the level of attention, high or low vibrational, the other person is the receiver of your energy therefore think about what did they give you first for you to give them your energy/attention. Before responding to a bully, ask yourself do they deserve your attention (your energy is expensive). They go low, we go high…Michelle Obama😉👑💎⭐️💅🏾
Don’t be afraid to go to HR if your silence doesn’t work and or leave for a better working environment.
Living this now…I started my level up journey after leaving an abusive ex while at my current job. I still work with two of the women he cheated on me with.
Despite my inner turmoil, I was sure not to look it! I didn’t want to look how I felt because that’s what they and my ex wanted-to ruin me. Yes, they flat out said this. They mocked and gaslighted me relentlessly and it started to really get to me…but some new friends snapped me out of it! So, I dressed nicer, worked out more consistently, networked, and improved my diet. I’m now their superior, which has opened up many possibilities both in and outside the company.
I don’t engage with them outside of basic courtesy and when required and they don’t affect my overall work experience, like they hoped.
Long before my promotion, I informed both of them that communication between us would be work-related only. Since then, they’ve resorted to brown nosing, nice-nasty and some gaslighting again, since they’re desperate to get to me. I remain neutral. After all my hard work, I just can’t associate with trash. 🚮 🤣
Good for you! The ex is definitely mad at himself because you left him and those women are regretting it too!🙏🏽💕
Be careful when going to HR, especially if your manager is the problem, usually the managers and HR are good friends and HR will try to protect the higher ups.
Correct.
I usually converse with a few and avoid the personalities that come off as hostile to me or those that try to present themselves as “being better than me”
Same. I avoid people who annoy me.
I have experienced work place bullies through a number of employers.
Sadly, these bullies were women in leadership roles.
HR was not very supportive in resolving these issues.
As a result, my solution for toxic work environments is to search for another job immediately.
I value my peace of mind and will not tolerate a toxic work environment.
Same but only there wasn’t no HR so it was worse
I had to tell a coworker recently that her behavior was inappropriate and I would report her if she did it again. She hasn't gotten outta line since and it felt so good to nip it in the bud immediately. Your videos have taught me not to let misbehavior fester and grow. Thanks again Chloe 🤎
I am one of those girls who was groomed to be kind and passive. I have no boundaries but I am working on it. It sucks when people know you do not have boundaries because they will walk all over you any chance they get. They know what they are doing; some stop when they see what they are doing, but others do not mind doing this. Im learning that its my job to set boundaries and tell people when something makes me uncomfortable. Thanks Chloe.
Chloe is a blessing! What I have learned: Make allies quickly! Talk to everyone initially, keep a work journal of incidents, be nimble and ready to apply to new jobs if things should go left before your workload gets too heavy.
In my experience mgmt never seems to think its a serious matter and usually the bully has manipulated mgmt into thinking they are great workers....
THIS RIGHT HERE!!!! 💯👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
What I do is go to Glassdoor and leave a review detailing the behavior of the building. If the CEO is not in the building he/she will be in there soon.
@@TheJournalingSoul I tried doing that but my damn job doesn’t have a thing with glass door review 😑
@@shutit4024 You may be able to start it.
@@TheJournalingSoul you’re right I don’t understand how nobody didn’t write a review on glass door about my job this company’s been out since 1997
This came right on time. Just got a job and the masculinas that were rude are now trying to be my friends and want to hang out. They men bash all day and expect me to jump in. I’m the most feminine woman there, nails done, hair done, makeup, etc and I was almost feeling down about myself and like I was being “extra”. Chloe, you are so right about having a dating life outside of work also, I found that having someone to look forward to is a great thing
Keep being you and learn to smile through it, I hope everything worked out for you
A friend of mine shared this and I am glad I watched it. I really didn’t understand how deeply affected I was by work place bullying until I listened to this. I may have even blamed myself. Just wow, thanks for sharing. I need to work on this.
Omg your always so relevant. I work in a field dominated by females. I was just telling a colleague I never met a female in which I would say I don’t like or have an attitude towards them. I’m always monitoring my energy staying positive and happy. I’ve heard people say they don’t like me just because I walk around smiling, giddy and happy. I’m ever so thankful everyday and if it’s a bad day I make the best of it. My manager and director constantly praise me for my attitude. So many of my coworkers are angry and mad females. They’re mad at a ‘man’ some even mad at the CREATOR. This video is well needed. This topic is often unheard of unspoken or overlooked
Thank you kindly,
I am going through a hard time being a subordinate of this woman together with the manager. They are beyond sick and the worst part is that there's no where to go since even "employee relations/HR" are all together in this bullying tactics. Obviously the only way out is to get a new job somewhere else. I like the advice of networking because really it would make it easier to get an even better job and work environment. Trying to make things right or acting nice is futile when it comes to these narcissists because not matter what, they will always find something "wrong" since they feed on drama and chaos. Anyway I'm grateful for this channel & I'm loving the feminine schooling❤
Wish me luck in finding a way better job & conducive work environment as soon as possible 🙏
@@munix9351 on it queen!
I avoid and ignore workplace bullies. They can be miserable and jealous and will not want to see you happy at work and will start drama with you for any reason. I would just do my work and go home. Meet friends outside of work to talk to.
I love this! The older I get the more I feel comfortable in my own shoes and able to stand up for myself in workplace.
Chloe_ this is a ON. TIME. WORD! I recently put in my 2 week notice at a job full of masculinas. The work environment drained me among other things. The day I got into a argument with one of these women was my cue to leave! Not worth it! The hate be so real. I have moved on to a job where my femininity can flourish more. No job is worth my peace of mind.
Ive been bullied at every job Ive ever had and it is extremely Exhausting. It triggered by Depression and brought my Self Esteem down so badly that I thought of ending my Life. Ive only been kind and nice to everyone that Ive encountered so I was confused. It forced me out after 3 years with the company. But eventually Enough becomes Enough. This time around I'm going to HR and getting a Lawyer. #Evolution #GodsGrace
Yes Hollee! Also make as many allies as possible quickly so when they spread those rumors around about you, it will be harder to stick! Masculinas hate beautiful secure women.
Same here sis. You are not alone.
Having allies is important.
Same I’m glad I’m not alone I thought it was just me. It’s cause you beautiful sis
I'm sorry for you Hollie you didn't deserve that. I hope you'll find a good job environment this year or the next year.
I work in HR and workplace bullying is actually illegal when it happens to a person in a protected class.
And many companies have policies that go beyond what is outlined legally and ban bullying in general as long as it is done consistently and without discrimination. This is why it is critical to have a competent HR department and to document all that you have experienced.
@@tashamack5120 Right. However, in certian workplaces HR are incompetent some are even friends with the builles. Enmode is also right workplace bullying is illegal to a person of a certian class. Also, one important thing what I learned was in my experience HR protects the corporation not a person.
@@ashlove7330 Yep, HR is not your friend so be weary when their input is required.
@@ashlove7330 I agree with you and I actually work in HR 😩 But in my company, I am well known for playing devil's (employee) advocate and using actual logic and facts in a lot of situations. Oh well, maybe they'll lay me off one day lol...or I tell my husband-to-be that I'm done working for corporate America and putting in my notice.
@@ashlove7330 I'm sorry if you have had a bad experience with HR. I'm sure there are some HR personnel that show favoritism. I'm an HR Director and I can assure you that I'm nobody's friend. LOL. I mostly represent the Company but I am fair and consistent and will speak up when I believe the employee is right. But at the end of the day, the company's interest is what is most important because if there isn't a company, there are no jobs. That's why it's so very important to choose the company you work for like you would choose your husband. Find a company that aligns with your values and do the best you can. Wishing everyone on this thread much success and happiness.
I needed this desperately. I am a naturally friendly and understanding person. I'm the type to not like arguing and I prefer a calm mature approach to a solution rather than the dramatics because the aggressive confrontation stresses me out and I just mentally shut down. I don't understand why I can never attract the same peaceful energy. All my life I've always attracted rude coworkers who feel the need to be disrespectful and gossipy; constantly bring negativity.
It's taken a toll on my self esteem because I know that I am more than competent in my workplace but the type of coworkers I attract are always bullies. It angers me and I can't stand it.
This video was so triggering for me. I’ve been in situations where I was harassed and bullied by multiple co-workers at my office but by the time I realized what was happening it was too late😢 I was forced to put in my 2week notice due to the ongoing harassment and bullying. Unfortunately it got so bad one Friday afternoon that I was forced to walk out before my two week notice was up! Thank God I’m stronger and I know better now!🙌🏾That could NEVER happen again
Moving on..Amen 🙌🏽
@@user-of9bx1uk3u Yesss Amen 🙏🏾
I am so sorry 😞this happened to you. I pray you found something that made you happy.
I just went through this for the first time in my career having to go to HR. It was not fun but my bully boss actually left me alone after that. I don't trust anyone. These people will take out their own misery and insecurity on you because they have power of "boss". Its the worst.
Misery loves company, glad you stood up for yourself…good luck to you🙏🏽💕
Great video Chloe, my former masculina unfortunately was my manager - huge, recently divorced toxic 'karen'. The entire company knew her reputation (including HR) and encouraged it. I knew my time was limited but my work was flawless and I had charmed the male senior managers which made her even more angry. This eventually helped me land a huge payout with extended benefits. On to the next...
I hate bullies that's why if anyone who is a Christian or Born again should always pray about your enemies everyday day and night for God to let vengeance be his. I guarantee you that supernatural things will start happening to your enemies, but do not rejoice when karma comes around for them always keep it moving.
I work from home, but when Chloe speaks I'm locked in! When I was going in to work, I was consistent in my femininity. Put effort into my appearance daily, and treated everyone pleasantly. Male co-workers went out of their way for me and the women (masculinas) HATED me. Smh. This video is so accurate, as always thanks Chloe for your words of wisdom ❤️
This couldn't have come at a better time! I'm experiencing encountering catty women at work.
In my family too! the timing is impeccable
Same!
Same here
I had a guy and a girl at my work who tried me for no reason,And just before
I could report them my husband ask me to married him and leave that job.
Five years happily married with two kids just saying happy homemaker over here ☝🏿.
Years later the guy apologized to me he said he was unhappy in his marriage and took it out others
Very strange but! I accept his apology and moved on.
The girl was Fired before I left I saw her at rooftop the other day very drunk.
Great video thanks Chloe
You showed them, good for you!💅🏽💕
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
This came to my timeline right on time! Thanks Chloe ❤️
Chloe, I needed this message years ago, it would've saved my health and career. I had no idea what to do. I ended up in the hospital suffering from high blood pressure and anxiety. The he-man woman and her crew of "wannabe loved" followers tried to destroy me for no reason at all. If I had this message it would've saved me some serious problems. I've been out of work for five years and I'm thinking of returning into the workforce in the coming months. I'm proud to say I got a new attitude and I'm armed with knowledge. I will not put up with the trash that I put up with from those masculine women. Never ever again will I let someone run me off a job. Thank you Chloe you don't know it but you saved my life. Thank you so very much.
@@rockandfashion7207 thank you for this information. I'm going to look into it.
Uh Chloe I messed up on Saturday I saw one of the women who used to work with me that turned out to be different than what I thought she was. Instead of paying her dust I told her "f u b". SMH. What makes it so bad is that I didn't even mean to say it out loud, it just happened. I seem to fail at running into people who I don't care for and telling them " f u" out in public. I'm working to get my masculine emotions in check.
Done it myself. Don't give away your power. Power in poise and posture. Silent storm
I wish I had this video when I was at my last job pre-covid. It was always the elder masculina that would hate on me at various job for absolutely no reason and I would take it personally. Now I work for myself but your quote “bullying isn’t personal” really resonates with me.
Thank you for this Chloe. Work culture can be the death of us,if you allow it. Working from home has saved so many of us.
🙌🏾 I pray that we never have to go back to an office.
No lies told there !!👏🏽
@@DoubleA-ou7pj 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Block delete and ignore and keep shining is my favorite way of dealing with a Masculina.😌being ignored is their weakness.
I work in a office with nothing but women and learned you have to be grown woman and be respectful at all time .... I learned to be professional at all times because sometimes bad behavior happens when you become friends with co workers (gossip and rude behavior) SORRY HONEY YOU CLOCK IN AND OUT don’t deal with people like that!
This was right in time. Just left work early because of work place bullies
Wow. Remember they jealous of you try to ignore those haters. I messed up before I diden tell the supervisor I was being harassed around promotion time. Let the bully get me upset. I should have told and walked away. Lesson learned. So report and make sure you take care of yourself. A back up plan is good.
same here but her days are numbered when ICE knocks on the door
It got so bad with my workplace bully that he even tried to recruit our colleagues to also be mean to me which he luckily didn't succeed at cause my co-workers said they had no issues with me and would not pretend they do.
My dear, I have experience this and it’s a tactic some lowlife men in leadership positions do... They will try to cause conflicts between you and your direct line manager or put pressure on your direct line manager to bully you. So, you’ll run to them for support and I’m the process manipulate you out of your boundaries. When they’re real gutter people that you’d not even involve yourself with outside of work.x
@@user-of9bx1uk3u thank you for that enlightenment. It was so traumatising that someone who doesn't even know me could hate me to that extent and put so much effort and time into making sure that my time at work would be as miserable as possible.
All of these tips will work wonders! But the main key is getting in front of the issue and being firm with your boundaries. Every thing said in this video rings true and don’t think your issue is small. You are important and you deserve nothing but good vibes.
Everything you said is so true. Especially the importance of documentation beats the hearsay doesn’t look professional. It can also backfire and make one look incompetent when we have it in our head and not on paper. I will be using some of these awesome strategies. Thanks
Wow Chloe, this came RIGHT ON TIME. This past week had not been great at the workplace for me....because I choose to stay out of messy behaviors, I am cast out of the island. Smh. I keep telling myself to be thankful that I the outkast.
I absolutely love every advice and suggestion you shared. I will definitely be applying them. Thank you Chloe.
I am starting a new corporate job on Monday! This is perfect and right on time, thank you 🙏
Congratulations
Have fun and make as many allies as possible!
Best of luck to you.
@@kimmurrell5811 Thank youu 🎉
@@flighter7713 That’s the plan! This video came right on time 😌
Thank you Chloe. This video is for me. I struggled for many years with just miserable, catty, gossiping women. For years I kept up kindnrss and people pleasing behaviors only to be more and more disrespected. I'm moving out of state (going no contact) and will do better for myself moving forward.
I haven’t even watched it and I KNOW I need this video. My supervisor loves to throw backhanded compliments my way now that I dress more feminine daily. Asked me if I had a wedding to go to not too long ago 🤷🏽♀️🙄 My boss gives employees the silent treatment when we use our days off 🤦🏾♀️ I love the job but dealing with these humans is DRAINING my soul.
I was training for a new job, this was the first week mind you. One particular woman kept coming up to me fussing at me every day. I told my trainer she had one more time to come to me and I’m making a harassment complaint. Never had issues with her ever again.
Why was she harassing you the 1st week on your job, she was probably jealous
Am introverted and with strong personality and I have never been bullied reason been I walk alone, I distance myself,I don't worship friends meaning I can do without friends, I don't befriend my koligs I take them as workmates period I don't even hang out with them am just me......
Chloe_ you don’t know how I needed this video. I mind my business at work but I still had a rumor spread around the office that I was dating a male colleague, which wasn’t true. When the gossip got to the point were the office bully started talking about my male colleague and were “kissing” and other things in the office, I went to my Supervisor. I’m not playing with my reputation when everything that bully was saying was not true. 3 years later I can see the light at the end of the tunnel b/c a new job opportunity has came along. Again thanks for this video!!!!
Omggggg this Is so true!!! Especially about the bullying at work.
My current work place is extremely toxic, the other day a lady shouted at me saying I should shut up she is talking, I was shocked, laughed ot off but it deeply affected me it was not just that day many different days, we work in a professional setting so I expect all of us should be but nop
There are groups of women making life hell not just for me but other colleagues as well
And I’m so sorry you have to deal with that. I’ve dealt with this too but from my boss.
I just got a new job at a golf course restaurant. I am glad I've stumbled onto this video
I was teased at my current job for having boundaries about my mandated break and lunch time. I have an alarm set for those so that I wont miss them. They get upset when I refuse to eat in the office or tell someone to come back at a certain time (after break time). I just make sure I stay true to myself because I dont need this job…but they do.
Exactly my love!x
I'm 25 and very feminine than majority of the women I work with. I've been being bullied a lot at work by some of these women including my supervisor. I know they are jealous of me and they've tried to get me fired countless amount of times but I've manage to keep my cool but i'm running out of patience and its starting to make me miserable like them and I dont want that for myself. Thank you so much for making this video I needed this advice right now.
Jesus I so needed this video about 5 years ago. I have so much to say on this topic but I am going to try to keep it short. I work in a toxic environment it has been so bad but since the pandemic I have been working at home and it has been a slight relief of not being in this building. I have go back to the building in September and I am terrified I am trying to look for another job. The women that I worked around has bern so intimidated by me that I had to interview for a position 14 times because they didn't want me to succeed and it was a game for them. I mean the poison went as high up and in so many circles. It was so bad I didn't want to get my hair and nails done or wear a new outfit because these woman would notice everything snd talk about me. I was turned into the office bitch because I was to nice and very feminine. I sorry about how long this is and I could go on but it took me very long time to learn to be assertive and I am still learning. But I am very afraid of going past assertive and becoming a bitch and it can get really nasty. Why are so many of our black women have that crabs in a barrel personality. I hate it I was never raised like that I have a Caribbean background and I have been raised to uplift one another because Sis if you make it then we have made it.
This is the reason I left nursing and I now work in the medical lab where ppl mind their own business. Sadly i find that an all-female workplace(with female bosses) is the grave for a femenine woman. Also, if management is male, i find that there is less foolishnezs that occurs. Female bosses=havoc and emotionalism) Worse, after u finish each shift of work, u bring tht negative energy back home. It aint worth it!!! It realy aint worth it girlz💕💕💕
You are right !!! I went through this 5 months ago
Chloe you don’t know how much this was needed. I just had situations this week. I just kill them with kindness and keep it to a minimum. I seem to keep having this issue with older women in the workplace.
Yes I am experiencing a colleague(woman) that always trying to gaslight me by calling me by another name and it irritates my soul!!! I always correct her though and she just laughs it off which is annoying. One day I went to her department which has 3 other people(2 women and a man) there and she asked me right in front of them why I always let the men at my job drool over me with my body and clothes(I have a hourglass figure), mind you I never talk to these men unless I have to. One time she asked me why I wear thongs underneath my skirt......like huh????? Why was she even looking at my ass???? I get so annoyed with her! And she always gives me side eyes like I did something to her, but like you said chloe_ kill them with kindness and that's what I always do, I never get out of character but from now on I will ignore her antics.
WOW that sounds like SEXUAL harassment to me, which is VERY ILLEGAL. I would keep a log and report her if I were you. What disgusting behavior.
@@anonymoususer-t7r very much disgusting behavior!!!!! Because of her I don't wear my skirts anymore.
Report her. The “thong” comments and body shaming is enough for you to bring to HR. It’s unacceptable and it creates a hostile work environment. I’m sorry that you’re going through this.
@@bubblesactivated exactlyyyyyyyyyyy, mayb because she is bad built she aspects me to wear clothes like her
@@GoldenLionessxo thank you sooo much!!! I already reported her to the HR and they said they would have a word with her😒 Hopefully it happened.
I was bullied at a job that I worked at for 7 years. My manager was very inappropriate and nasty towards. One day I couldn’t take it anymore and confronted her. She denied everything and laughed it off. She was nice for a little after, but things went back to how they were. I quit shortly after and now I’m in a healthier work environment and making more many. 💅🏽💁🏽♀️
Thank you so much for this I've been dealing with this for God knows how long I just turned 26 and I now understand I definitely have to assert myself more people look at me and see me as this native person because I literally get told I look 12 on a daily I've lost so many jobs because of this thank you Chole.
Chloe my love. You are always on time. I just started a new job six days ago and have been dealing with a work place bully each day I've gone into work. The company's philosophy is litterally making the environment a pleasant and fun place to be, and most people who work there are pretty great so far, it's a real team environment, except for this one Masculina. She was kinda pleasant the first day, however everyday after that she's been extremely horrible to me and a couple others co workers.
This video came right on time and helped to give me some extra tips on how to deal with this situation. Thank you so much 💜
I am dealing with a masculina bully manager who is causing a lot of havoc for me at my work...this week it has intensified because I have begun to put bounderies...today I'm seeing her after working remotely for a week (which has helped a lot)...I was just wondering how I was going go deal with her while scrolling on my phone and that's when I came across your RUclips....thank you so much for taking the time to help so many women out there...you are a God send
This video was EXCELLENT. Serving women and children as a nurse and health educator is my heart and passion and I have excelled through the years getting all types of promotions, awards, raises, leveling up, and thanking my mentors and nurse leaders who invested in me and guided me along the way. I endured two HORRIBLE cases of bullying in my career and I’m thankful I overcame them both. #LessonsLearned
Yes A work place nightmare Walmart in San Antonio, Tx I was a customer host. I could drop names but no need for that. I did not know how to handle this. There was few African Americans in the whole store. The job payed very well. From the first day the management began dragging me in the office. Each manager one at a time writing me up. I was so frustrated. I was fired after many attacks and they refused to give me unemployment. Plus suspended me for 6 months. I still do not know why. I have tried to work at other Walmart stores here but they communicate back and fourth. Anyway. This place is horrible with diversity and Inclusion. I am still unemployed but I have been trying. They mentality here is really something. I am working on a plan to relocate our of Texas. I would love to turn this whole situation around. In a positive manor. Thank you Chloe_
This is soooooo needed. I'm currently going through this at work with management and HR. I need an attorney at this point.
Omggg so needed previously struggled with covert narcissist mother and grandmother and long term narc jealous besties now dealing with work environment it's like we have no peace. Please make more videos on this topic.
The truth!!! My last experience with this was such hell three years ago lol. While I was still a bit unhealed and extremely defensive because I had always been attacked by females in the workplace, I am very petite but was always very ladylike and dainty and naturally, the men were drawn to me. They would always tell the other ladies etc and when I just started there they would all try to buy me breakfast/lunch, asking me out, leaving me secret notes and flowers, brought me snacks etc. Believe you meeeeeeeeeeeeee they HATED that even more. At that time, I showed myself to not be weak so I had a bit of aggressive assertiveness lol when they began bullying me and I had my back against a wall- it was intenseeeeeeeee. The environment was indeed very toxic and the morale was extremelyyyyyyyyyy low. Man, I felt sick going to work every day eventually but I did notice that many of them began dressing like me which was cute to see lol. They even complained that I brushed my teeth after having lunch🤣🤣. I was told later on that they referred to me as "Little bitch" lolol. Admittedly, even though I knew that they did what they did because they were miserable, I still got drawn into the nonsense a bit. All I wanted to do was my job; they ganged up, lied, called the higher-ups on me because I spoke to them a bit harshly AFTER they were extremely rude to me and refused to complete tasks I had assigned to them. There was also no one to report it to-the environment was very toxic and dysfunctional. Imagine having to sit through parties that they're throwing and not inviting you and being provoked about it. It was intenseeeeeee!
This would have been very helpful at that time for me, surely, but you'd be surprised the levels these demonic entities would go and sometimes it can feel like a whirlwind especially when the structure of the organization is very dysfunctional. Give yourself room to forgive yourself and others, learn from it and keep that feminine charm on point!!!
I wonder if we work at the same job.. the place operates like a dysfunctional family.x
@@user-of9bx1uk3u Hahahahahahahahah, if you're in the Caribbean then perhaps hahahahhaha!!! These entities thrive anywhere! They're legit like weeds, popping up everywhere! Thankfully we know how to pluck them out effectively lol
Im glad you made this list ! If I may add ☝🏽I also like “why are you telling me this?” When the repeat requests don’t work
Just started a new job at a early childhood center and as you know it’s predominantly women. And I’m the only black woman there. I mind my business and as always, there’s a woman of no color that has an issue with me. I wear my makeup, I dress professionally casually cute. All the women there wear dirty jeans or sweatpants and baggy cardigans. I know we work with small kids but damn. I watch this channel to remind me not to take it personally and keep minding my feminine business. The kids like me and the boss does and that’s all that matters.
Very valuable information! I had an abusive ex-supervisor at one point in my life and without knowing it I killed them with kindness!!!
They were micro-managing me so much and when she brought up everything I was doing “wrong” I told them “Thank you so much for that! I understand that everything you are telling me is helping me become the best employee I can be. I will continue to integrate everything you have taught me, this is all very valuable information.” & Most importantly - I wasn’t sarcastic. I kept it sincere! Because I honestly didn’t know how else to rationalize them being so rude to me 💀
Thank God I am no longer under their leadership!
NEVER report anything HR. document everything and go over their head. HR protests the company, not you.
I had to learn this the hard way.
Go over their head to who?
So amazing that this video came up on my feed. I needed to see it because every job I work at has workplace bullies who keep bothering me. I’m literally a few days in at a new job and already getting bullied by someone who is supposed to help train me. So I will definitely listen to the tips from this video.
Chloe, you have taught me more in this 16 min video than multiple therapy sessions I've taken in the past (not to knock therapy, it just wasn't for me). Thank you so much!
Same here, therapy did not do a thing for me but this was everything. I left two toxic workplaces and start a new job next week
I’m reading through the comments and the common theme I see is women bullying women! This is scary. I already know men can be inappropriate, but the viciousness from your female counterparts is mind boggling. Why do we continue to be each other’s enemy? We need a conversation!
Actually!!! Sadly I quit a job that was like that and even 2 of the guys that worked at my job were super nice! One quit because of a better job and the other one quit because he was also being bullied because he was gay 🤦🏽♀️
T Y It’s about a matter of time before HR rearranges that whole office! Good that you changed jobs!
I have this one coworker that would say little smart shit whenever I looked cute or got a raise I stoped talking to her now she all tryna be my friend
I had a former colleague that used to harass me send me a FB friend request. Block & delete
@@sophisticatedmm3632 best thing to do cut them straight off
I've dealt with workplace bullies and learned valuable lessons. I'm blessed to be in a healthier environment but will keep those phrases at the end in my back pocket. Inevitably, new level, new devil.
What timing Chloe. As we speak! This woman who had been harassing me since 2016. Has now ended up in the department I am in now. Yes, 2016 because the men managers didn’t want to deal with it. I even moved my seat. Good thing I have let the management here know what transpired and we are still working from home.
Like you stated, they were like that way before you experience the negativity.
When I worked in the fashion industry I was bullied by a lot of women. They had to their own cliques, ostracised me, laughed behind my back. Purposely wouldn't give me any work so I looked bad in front of my manager. I went home crying everyday. 😢
THIS was weeeeelllllll needed for feminine women such as my self that work in corporate and CONSTANTLY has a target on her back as early as the interview stage! 🙄🙄
I was bullied at a job but am in a better place now if you are bullied especially by a boss leave there are greener pastures.
You're so right about all if this. Dealing with a racist nurse manager right now for the past 3 years. Its a man, although he says he has a wife has very effeminate mannerisms and speech. I am very feminine, and wear dresses all the time. I smile and am pleasant to everyone. I am also the only black nurse. He has hired and I haven't anyone that wasnt white be hired. I get the worst feeling of negative energy and anxiety whenever hes near. Its hard because for the most part I like my co workers. And Im great at and comfortable with my job. Its hard to decide what to do.