Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
At a large hospital in the North West where I was in IT. Caller: I can't get anything on the screen and I know it's switched on because the light on the monitor is on. Me: OK, Let's check if the lead from the monitor to the computer is plugged in correctly. Have a look round the back of the monitor and see if you can see two cables coming out of the back. Caller: NO! I'll get a shock. You're trying to give me an electric shock! Me: No I'm not, please let's just check the cables and I promise you won't get a shock. Caller: Not likely, you'll have to come down here and fix it. So I wandered over to her office and was surprised to find the monitor was there but the computer wasn't. I asked where the computer was and she said 'Oh, they took that bit away for repair yesterday'.
Jesus christ 😂 I was in a hospital on IT once as well, but the people who were calling at least admitted, that they don’t know anything about computers and tried to learn some stuff 😂 but there was one woman, that had problem with connecting her phone on the wifi, and when me and my boss (I wasn’t employed there, I had my practical studium there) got there, he told me to explain her the phone and he is going to check the computer and one machine connection, because that wasn’t working either. He fixed it in seconds, as it needed just pluging the cable, and click on the icon 😂 the we stayed there for 10 minutes, before I explained here what to do with the wifi, as you needed to log yourself on the browser (I don’t remember the name of that security config) and then explain her why it does so
Gordon Jackson " she said 'Oh, they took that bit away for repair yesterday'." And that's why it's best to work for a third party ie: the manufacture/maintainer. That will be £48 call out, £248 labour, all excluding vat, because there's nothing wrong apart from you are an idiot. I did ask if I could add a "stupid tax" but was told no :( Always makes you feel better to punish stupid with a large bill. "User Error, replace user and continue".
We are all from the past. I once called IT support after waiting 30 minutes to log in. I suggested to a disinterested IT berk that he needed to go down into the cellar and whip the stokers to shovel more coal into the Mr Charles Babbage's Great Shoeburyness Difference Engine. 'Eh' he replied...I hung up and went to dine at my club in Mayfair.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@PORRRIDGE_GUN Marvellous haha, you certainly did show that miserable lout what a true upscale sense of humour is like, all the more pity for him not being able to comprehend your finely crafted guffaw. I hope the gents at the club showed a bit more appreciation for the old "coal-powered IT infrastructure" line, what an absolute killer. You sir, are a genuine comedic talent.
My two favorites: 1. Upper level executive, when a program he launches from his desktop wouldn't work, I needed to figure out where it was located. I asked him to right-click the icon. His response, "Don't get technical with me!" 2. Working warranty support for a computer manufacturer, got a ticket to fix a computer under warranty. Of course, if it's not a warranty issue, the company that owns the system has to pay for the service call. The problem is nothing comes on the screen at all when the computer is turned on. Called the user and asked him to confirm the monitor is plugged into the computer. I said, "I'd hate for it to be a simple issue that will end up costing us both time and you money." He got pissed and said, "Of course I checked it! Get out here and fix it!" No problem! On my way. Walked up to the desk, plugged the monitor into the computer, verified it worked and had him sign the invoice for the service call.
That first one is why Apple mice don't even have a right click button, they just click the whole mouse. That second one is why . . . well, let me tell you a story. Back when I was going to school to get my mechatronics degree, I had the pleasure of being taught by some of the best professors in the business. One of them would always tell us "check that it has power before you do anything else." He was talking about sensors, but still. I've heard the story more than once from him that a fellow would call from the factory floor, multimeter in hand, and go "my sensor isn't working." So my professor would ask "what's the voltage going to the sensor?" "12 volts. What, do you think I didn't measure it?" "No, I need to know, 12 point what? It's for the form here that I have to fill out." About 2 minutes later, the fellow on the floor would invariably go "hey, figured out the problem" and hang up, having discovered the sensor didn't have power. Now, IDK what you could ask the fellow on the other end that would produce the same response, but it seems to me that there should be something along those lines. Maybe ask for the color of the light by the power button? If it isn't even on, then we've got a rather obvious problem there. If you turn the monitor on and it's not connected to a PC, most modern monitors will display a rather prominent "device not connected" message, so that's a self diagnosing issue as well. If those fail, attempt to turn the PC off and on again, which will solve the issue if the PC was never on in the first place. With stubborn people, you have to hold their hand and take them on a walk through fields of wildflowers, otherwise they'll just hunker down, refuse to check, obstruct any efforts to fix the problem, and just generally waste time, money, and effort in an attempt to not look stupid. In some businesses, that attitude can lead to deaths, like the various miscalibrated radiotherapy machines that killed via radiation overdose, all because the technician who miscalibrated the machine in the first place refused to check his work, on the grounds that he obviously did it right the first time. There's a guy rotting in jail at this very minute because of that, I'm 90% certain.
You talking about Therac-25? That wasn't because of a technician not doing their due diligence, it was a software error because the company very stupidly assumed they wouldn't need to update some of their code because "it works" even though they updated other parts of it. The result is was a race condition in which if the technician didn't do things at exactly the right time patients could be administered lethal doses of radiation.
@@CrizzyEyes yes and no. I don't know the specific details of each incident, but I do know that patients have been administered lethal doses of radiation on at least 3 separate occasions, all resulting in similar death tolls over similar time-frames. As terrible as it is though, the mechanics of that incident are damn interesting.
@@mage3690 That sounds like it, in reality there were 6 cases where they were held accountable for poisoning a patient, but only 3 of them were lethal. Apparently the software was always buggy but they had hardware locks to prevent lethal dosages before, then arrogantly removed them because "the software works" even though they had no testing suite at all. It's one of the most absurd cases of arrogance and recklessness you'll ever read about in engineering
I once spent more than half an hour on the phone with a client that was upset that their website was down. Their website was up and running just fine. I asked them to go to a computer and check, and they said that they couldn't. I asked them why, but they didn't tell me. I asked them if they could go to another office in the building to check, and they said that wouldn't work either. I finally got them to explain that they believed that their website had to be down because the computers in their office weren't working. I explained that their website ran on computers outside of their office, but they didn't believe me. After about the tenth time asking them why their office computers weren't working, they shouted in frustration "because our power is out!" To this day I have no idea how they expected me to get their website back up if their idea of "our website runs on a computer in our office" was correct when the entire area was in a blackout.
Most people truly think IT can fix everything lol. I work as an IT staff (mostly software dev, but I do troubleshoot too if anything in the office went 'wrong'), one time my coworker ask me why she can't registering a new accounts to a certain website (it was stationary ecommerce web). I noticed it need captcha, but the captcha doesn't work somehow and she ask me to fix it. The thing is that website is somebody else's website so I have no access to it (hell I don't even know who made it or who's the owner it) so I suggest her to call the number of that company yet she insisted that I should fix that because according to her "IT people must be know how to fix this kind of things". I literally just left her desk, back to my desk and wear earphone so she wont bother me again lol.
About twenty years ago I was working at a computer repair shop. On one occasion I received a call from a woman who explained that her computer wouldn't turn on and asked if there was anything that I could do to help her over the phone. While walking her through the basic things that one would check, she made a comment that she couldn't see very well because the power was out. I had to dig real deep to find a nice way to explain how the power outage was directly related to the state of her computer. It was a painful experience. My career in the tech support industry has left me with many such stories of an equally disturbing nature, but I can't share any more of them with you right now because thinking about them is making me sad.
I once had to do an onsite fix to a lawyer bufette cause one of their newer computer was making "weird noise".. my boss said "just go and do what she says , she will pay anything and doesnt listen to our advise" .. so i went there.. she pointed the computer and said "its making noise!" ... all i could hear was the regular fan noise .. so i told her and she answers "no look. the other computers dont make noise.. this is not normal!" .. turned out the other computers in her office were really old office rigs with passive heating.. no nearly fans.. so they were more quieter.. she just had got a newer computer with CPU fan and she couldnt process that.. and as my boss said she just paid the full going there and "cleaning" the computer fan just in case .. he also told me later that she generated a LOT of work cause she used really old outdatter stuff and refused to upgrade.. they had even offered her new stuff at discount to help but she refused and prefered to pay a lot more to keep old stuff running
It took me years before I realized that Moss' "Did you try forcing an unexpected reboot?" is essentially asking the caller to turn it off and on again.
+silvercomic Well, sort of. Unexpected reboot means you don't go via the normal path of letting it do a proper system shutdown. It means you cut the power then restart it, either by hitting the reset button or holding the power button down for 10 seconds.
I'm sorry to tell you that, but unexpected reboot means the Restart Button. Turning it on and off is completely different action. I hope that it won't take you years to understand the difference between those 2 actions.
Some things never change. Back in the days when personal computers were a distant dream, personal music players were called "transistor radios". As an electronics student I was frequently asked to fix someone's radio. My standard reply was "put in a new set of batteries, and I'll have a look at it". I never had a follow up call.
Back in the early 70's, working for a music shop, housecall on faulty organ.... She - 'Have you found the problem ?' Me - 'Yeah, just one of the transistors needs replacing' She - 'Wot, so it's got a lot of radios in it, then ?................
@@codefeenix Based on years of observation (and being properly old), I have noticed that Middle Age is the point where being warm becomes more important than being cool.
Does anyone still come here? Anyway, my personal most favourite story was a customer calling in, because her internet connection wasn't working. It was an elderly lady, so she really had no experience whatsoever. I asked her which lights on her router were glowing and she said she needed to go and look. So I waited. She then apologized, saying that she had to go way back, because she had placed the router "back in the cupboard". When I asked her to specify, she explained to me that she had done just as the flyer said, she plugged the router in and waited for three days. (That was the time we needed to set the maximum speed for our customers at the time). Now, according to her logic she kept the router plugged in for three days (the flyer literally said "keep connected for 3 conseclusive days", indicating that it should not be dis- or reconnected during this time), and that would somehow "charge" the internet. She then unplugged the thing, thinking that it was "finished charging" and put it in a cupboard, so it wouldn't be standing around needlessly. I then explained to her that the router needs to stay connected in order to work and that we had only set the speed during the first three days. 😅😅 I thought that her idea was kind of endearing.
It's cute, but still completely illogical. I guess some people *REALLY* don't understand how things work. Or don't try to figure any of it out on their own. I guess we all do this to a certain extent in a area we know nothing about.
I got a new device a few months back. Came with a power cord. I plugged it in and waited an hr for it to charge so I could use it. Unplugged it, cause it should be charged by now, and went to use it. It took me longer than it should to realize that it wasn’t chargeable and had to remain plugged in.
I.T. support for just over 30 years. Seen it all. Best story. Came in early one day to swap out a workstation before the employee gets to his desk. I transfer his home folder to the new Mac and head back to his desk 5 minutes before he's due in. As I step into his cubicle, he's already there, tapping on his keyboard, clicking his mouse, staring at the blank monitor screen. I say, "Would you like me to hook up the new machine?". He turns, seeing the computer in my hand and his eyes pop. "No wonder it wouldn't wake up from sleep." , He says as he notices, finally, the empty spot on his desk where the computer should have been.
When I first started I was working in a repair shop and I dunno , must've been in my first week or my second , I had this lovely old lady come in and ask me if we sold replacement cup holders. I knew right at that moment I would have work for the rest of my life.
My funniest story was when I was working at a chemical company. I had a call from one of the lab technicians, saying her inkjet printer wasn't working (which was a common problem with them in the 90s, they were properly temperamental buggers). On entering the lab, I met the frustrated tech who proceeded to tell me she'd tried everything; turning it off and on again, reloading the paper, checking the cartridges, even shouting at it. Now for some reason I can't explain, I found myself asking if she'd tried being nice to it and, when she looked at me like I'd lost the plot, I explained that printers perform better if they're shown a bit of love. I turned to the printer, patted it gently and said, "Are you going to work for me, please?" I sent the print job to it and, lo and behold, it printed out straight away. The funny part was two weeks later, when I bumped into her colleague, who told me he'd just watched her stroking her printer and talking to it like it was a cherished pet dog! I can't believe she actually fell for it!! I got out of IT support after 15 years and moved into consultancy, when I finally got fed up of people telling me my job can't be that hard because they had a Windows PC at home.
There's a rule when it comes to tech support, similar to Sod's Law. If you've got a competent techie on the line, you can guarantee that they will talk to a total idiot. If you're an end user who isn't a complete moron when it comes to computers, you'll end up with the thickest/laziest tech support guy/woman of all. It's not always the case, of course, but it often seems to be.
666NedFlanders It's not pre-canned responses that I have an issue with. The issue I have is when you contact tech support with a specific problem, it takes them two months to solve it (when it is an issue affecting your entire flat), and they decide to "fix" things that were similar to what you asked for, but actually had nothing to do with it (making networking changes for an Xbox One when I said my Xbox 360 was one of the things not working on the network). Oh, and yeah, "please contact your admin" messages suck enormously. Still, they're more useful than an error message I got whilst working on a Toshiba laptop; "The installation is failure. Please make sure its reason then retry install" - and yes, that was an official Toshiba program/driver.
+Lukeno52 As someone with *some* PC savvy (i.e. far from expert, but some!) I fully endorse your concept and suddenly everything in the World makes sense.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@noneone8726 jesus can you not read or something? Your response, which you copy pasted in many threads, is completely unrelated to what the person said, and cannot be a real response. Shit, I'm talking to a bot aren't I.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@noneone8726 um.... i think you responded to the wrong comment, sweetie. edit: Also that's utter bullshit. Just sayin. "The customer is always right" is the mentality that creates Karens.
LOL, I just started working as a computer technician. You would be surprised how often you have to tell them to turn the computer on. Not just rebooting, but a lot of the time the computer will actually be turned off, and they cannot figure out why it's not working...
Junior Santiago Fortunately my job is a bit demanding than that. Yeah sure 25% of the time a quick power cycle will fix it, but I have to deal with a lot of old POS(point of sale, though piece of shit works too) equipment that fails all the time. Some of these systems still use 8 bit hardware, they're that old...
Phlaked Corn I am glad to get out of IT. But, things will go a lot better if you are nice to the users. IT guys have a bad wrap as being jerks, so people appreciate the kindness (at least in my experience) good luck!
Worked in IT for my life in a car factory, two of my best stories: 1 . Guy calls me up , tells me his computer doesn't work. Ok I say, well I'll go out and see what's the problem, when I get there I see it and I say: "Mhm, well dude, there is a hole the size of my hand on the side of the PC...." he says, yes, a forklift hit it, but I should fix it because it doesn't work... 2. Guy calls us up, tells us their printer doesn't work, OK, collague and me go out and see what's up at the logistiks office. We get there and see that the printer has been damaged. Pretty clear cut, they hit it with something so I say, wait here I'll get the papers, you fill it out we take it away and your department can pay for repairs. I go to the car to get the papers but when I get back the printer is nowhere to be found (huge office printer), so I ask the same people there , where is printer? They say what printer, they have no idea what I am talking about.... OK, I have better things to do, I leave them, the printer is not ours, if they loose it, it's on them anyway. A few hours later our boss comes in and asks us if we know something because he got a call from the company's home factory from Germany as to "Who the fuck packaged a fucking printer with the engines on the train??"
My first helpdesk job I had a lady call in because her computer didn't work. I went to her desk and she simply hadn't pushed the power button on the computer. She had been trying the monitor. She actually got really mad at me since she was so embarrassed. A few years later I had the exact same issue with a different user. This time the person was embarrassed as well but instead of being a jerk, they were apologetic. Several years later I had another similar incident. I tried so hard with the lady. The woman called in claiming her computer was dead. I asked all the right questions. She assured me that the computer had lights on. She told me that the monitor had a power light lit. She guaranteed me that the power strip was turned on. I drove to the site. I walked through the building and into her office, looked at the power strip, clicked the power switch to the on position, and walked away. As I passed her I simply said, "Your power strip was off."
I had a lot of great stories while working in ISP IT support like 10 years ago. I guess I've could wrote a book about that times. Top two: 1. Once an eighty-year-old woman called me in support and complained that the Internet was not working. I prepared for an hour-long conversation, as based on my experience, such cases have always been extremely difficult. Difficult - because it is almost impossible to explain how the Internet works to an elderly person. Instead, granny cheerfully inquired about her network settings, complaining that the network connection switched to DHCP instead of static IP. I told her the network settings, after which everything worked, and it took like 3 minutes. I was amazed. 2. Once a person called asking for drivers for a network card issued by our company when connecting computers to the Internet. At the same time, he mentioned that he uses linux, to which I replied that unfortunately, we do not support linux (at that time we only worked with windows machines). The dude was upset, thanked me and hung up. I left a comment in the system about his call and soon forgot about this case. A week later, he calls support again and gets on me. Complains that the Internet is not working. I look at the comment in the system left by me, I remember this situation and just in case I repeat that we do not have drivers for linux. He replies, "don't worry, I just need network settings, I have already written drivers for the network card myself."
I've had numerous teachers be amazed at the fact that you can move windows across different monitors using extended mode. Definitely helped a lot of them during distance learning. And at the same time, I had several teachers be completely confused with even attempting to drag a window across. I have a lot of patience most of the time, but some of them couldn't even understand how to do it, no matter how many times I sat with them and showed them step by step. One of them just gave up within the first few minutes of the demo.
My professor said whenever he was forced to fix silly things he would tell the person asking, "Oh yeah it was an ID-10T problem. You are good now." And no one ever realized what he was saying XD
Or nobody felt confident enough to show they understood the insult. That phrase has been around far longer than PCs and I saw it referred to with military forms.
When this first aired I couldn't believe what I was watching. I started in IT as a field service engineer in 1970 and finished my sentence in 2000. I feel as though I've met every character in this amazing series.
Working Tech support for an IT department in an elementary school district. Overheard a colleague trying to walk a teacher thru a problem she was having with her computer. Tried very hard not to lose it when my colleague finally asked "Is there a child in the room?"
I genuinely don't think you can be roasted harder than to have a technician prefer to attempt to explain himself to an actual elementary school child rather than that child's teacher.
I once got a call from a user that she was missing a program that we installed for her the day before. I connect to her PC only for her to tell me I was interrupting someone else. "Sorry about that, on my end her PC shows up as yours. Did you two switch computers recently?" "Yeah we switched desks today. That shouldn't affect the programs though, right?"
As a retired IT person this is exactly what to expect. I've had enough dealing with stupid. Most problems are PEBCAK. Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard.
We had the researchers from this show visit our company and speak to our IT dept, my boss had to tell all the funniest stories we had in IT and define our IT support people to help them with the show. It's great how close they were to some of the things we told them.
I work in IT. I know a ridiculous amount about computers and troubleshooting compared to average people, but at least a third of all my jobs literally involve me forcing the machine off, turning it on again and it working fine. That's why this scene coined the slogan of the industry. Most people never try turning it off and on again.
+boiledelephant I'd say about 90% of all computer related problems can be fixeed by a simple reboot. Seriously, it's the first question I ask if I get a call. "Have tried restarting it?"
It never ceases to amaze me, even after twenty odd years, that people laugh about us using the old reboot line and yet never actually do it before calling in with a problem.
Really? REALLY? How do they don't reboot? That's the first thig a toddler learns to do about troubleshooting his game PC. It is hilarious if your job depends on computers and you don't have elementary skills of maintaining it.
Yep. But considering the millenials, it may be better to have a dinosaur behind the desk that has no clue what a computer is, rather than a punk that has no clue about what work is.
jesus christ this brings back bad memories. so fucking glad i left. ironic enough, i became registered nurse at a mental ward. less insane and more relaxing.
Worked in IT support too long. I have some crazy stories. I had a WoW kid complaining about a graphics card not working and when we took in the card we saw that he had actually mounted a custom fan on it, that wasnt the problem. The problem was that he mounted it with wooden screws that went straight through the circuit board of the graphics card. When i explained that this is not covered by warranty he threatened me that he would wait with his WoW guild outside my job and kick my ass. (WoW = World of Warcraft)
One user had some trouble with a program so i asked for the name of his computer so that I could connect via remote desktop. Once connected I see a guys profile for a dating website, with tabs for 3-4 other dating websites. I try to go to the control panel so that I can fix his troubles but he and I end up fighting over the control of the mouse pointer. Eventually he wins and closes all his tabs, so I ask "did you ever receive a remote desktop approval message?" Turns out he didn't and that I had typed the wrong computer name and connected to a completely different person.
Windows is just so, so stupid. Why limit 2 users logged on simultaneously? Why does remote desktop even allow the user to control the mouse pointer at the same time as the remote agent?
@@CrizzyEyes Are you aware that all remote control software does this...? You can disable remote input, but you shouldn't be taking over a users' computer either.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@noneone8726 needless foul language aside, i agree with this overall sentiment. if you are being paid to to provide a service, and the manner in which it is delivered is almost equally important to the technical expertise involved.
I'm actually a network engineer, but when we don't have anything to install or expand, I also do the IT support for the private customers in the small company I work for. We once had a small stand at a trade fair as a company and I had to work on our stand. An elderly woman came to our booth and entered our sweepstakes and asked what she could win. Tried to explain it to her but she didn't understand the concept of IT and tech and after way too long here and there I told her that she could get someone to come and do some housework for her at home for free. Silence for weeks after normality returned and everything: Then I had the week off and when I went to work again, my boss told me that someone had won our lottery and would like someone to mow the lawn and that some idiot told her that we do these kind of services. Anyway, after esplaining to my boss what exactly happened I went to the older woman at home who I lied to for fun and mowed her lawn...
I always felt a bit sorry for IT people dealing with idiots like me, so I always made a point of trying to understand what they were doing, taking an interest and being really grateful for their support. In my last workplace, this resulted in me acquiring a coterie of IT ‘groupies’ - there were four of them - very nerdy lads, bless them - and they started coming up to the building I worked in for lunch and chats on a regular basis. I think people may often have been quite rude to them - ten years later, I’m still FaceBook friends with one of them! 😂 I worked in a large organisation, but I never had to wait for any IT issue to be resolved - pays to have friends in the right places!
My parents once told me that there are two groups any good manager in an organisation respects. The secretariat, and the janitorial staff. I guess you could add the IT department to that list.
Even just being nice to others at your workplace can get you so far. If you have multiple tasks to do of the same priority, you bet your ass I'd do the task requested by someone nice than do the task requested by the person who thinks your subhuman. I haven't even worked IT and that transfers to any other industry.
Same! Many years ago I worked for a newspaper & there were two main IT guys. No one treated them very well, especially the sports editor. Anytime one of them helped me with something, I was always sure to thank them profusely and treat them like humans & shockingly, they always helped me first (or close to it)😉 One time I was being helped and he muttered some choice words about the sports guys😂 Anyway, they would always come by my cubicle for a chat and I'd swing by their office & bring them desserts and things. It worked great. I mean, niceness pays off.☺️
I once heard a story about a woman who was told to move mouse up and click the "View" menu at the top of the screen. After 10 min of her responding trough the phone that it doesn't work, IT came to her desk. It turned out that when she moved the mouse up, she picked it up and held it 10 cm above the desk xD
I remember going on a service call and asking the receptionist who's PC was not working if she had tried turning it off and on again. She looked at me and asked "You can turn it off?"
That's an old trick. I use it sometimes, but only as a joke. More than one of my university professors have been burned by that line (I wasn't the one doing the burning, promise), and they will absolutely refuse to touch my keyboard or mouse, because once they do, everything is their problem and they have to fix the whole program written by their student. Oh, sure, they'll tell you what to do, step by painful step, but you bet your boots they ain't touching your keyboard or mouse. "What did you do?!?" Well, first of all, it's what did _you_ do, I have yet to do anything.
One of the best support stories on my behalf. User calls in with computer problem, remote into their system and began doing the work. All is going well and then suddenly I don’t have connection. Running pings, checking the sites server, etc - everything is fine on site except for the users machine. Call the user and ask them what’s up with the computer? User tells me that he turned it off to save power. Was baffled when I explained to him that the computer needs to be on, in order for me to have a remote connection and troubleshoot the issues.
I was interior communications in the Navy many years ago(many decades ago). There was a piece of equipment called a DRAI table (Dead Reckoning Analyzer/Indicator) It's essentially a big lighted game of Risk at sea. Shows all the expected positions of ships friendly or otherwise within shooting distance. It wasn't working and in the Navy, you can't ask the caller to trouble shoot over the phone because that's YOUR job. So I went up to the bridge and looked at it for about 3 seconds, then turned it on. I really tried to not look smug because that's bad, so I asked if I could be of further assistance and was dismissed quickly. At the end of my enlistment I went to work for Pacific Telephone (you know it as AT&T). That situation never stopped happening for the next 30 years but at least I could save myself a drive by having the customer trouble shoot it if they would. It saved them time to do it themselves and often saved them money. My favorite comment of all was after taking off the phone jack cover (Yep kids, you used to have to plug your phone into a phone jack for it to work! I know right?! Barbarous!!! inconceivable!!!) People would often say after seeing 4 wire spade clips screwed down, "Is that all that's in there?" Like there's supposed to be flashing lights and technology in there. Next one was when I'd replace a defective phone set they'd ask, "Is it still the same phone number?" "Yes it is. The phone set doesn't determine the phone number." It was a really fun job most days!
Since everyone seems to be sharing IT stories, I'll give one. I received a call from an office worker employed by one of my clients. Their computer was extremely slow. It was not a bad computer ether. I deleted windows temp and user profile temp files (there were a lot) but then I wanted to see how long the computer was turned on. Sometimes the easiest way to do that for a computer that has sleep mode disabled is to check the length of time the internet was connected. I do that and see that the computer was on for more than 700 days. I told her that you have to reboot a computer for it run optimally at least once a week if not twice. She got extremely mad at me for saying that and stated "I was told turning off a computer is bad for it". She say that in a very rude way, so I responded with "No IT professional on earth would tell you that". Mind you, this was 2 years ago and this woman sounded pretty young. I will never forget that conversation.
So turn out she was working for google and her computer was google server she turned them off like you told her to and google stoped working for a while. XD haha imagine of that hapenned XD
With all due respect, normally you don't need to reboot your computer a couple of times a week. Yes, if the operating system or some application has memory leak bugs, it can help. But if the computer works fine, normally there's no reason to reboot it. Also, while a good thing to do once in a while, cleaning temporary files usually doesn't improve performance. That being said, if the computer has been up for 700 days, it means there were no updates installed, including security updates. Which normally is not OK for a computer connected to the internet. Also, she was not entirely wrong. Turning a computer off and on too frequently is not great for the longevity of mechanical drives. Then again, neither is keeping them on for extended intervals when not actually needed. After a number of years of continuous spinning, the hard drive bearings can fail. Also, sometimes the IT department tells you never to turn your computer off, because they want to be able to automatically run maintenance operations on them over night, but it doesn't seem to be the case here.
@@VladimirNicolici TECHNICALLY if it was a linux system it would mean it did have updates; since, rolling release n all that but i am very much assuming that was not the case here
@@Gaze73 That is a failure of the IT department, not hers. Automatic updates can be enforced by group policy, and any failures can be monitored centrally.
Whoever wrote for this show definitely worked in IT at some point. Here is a couple of gems that I have gotten over the years: "There's black smoke coming out of the back of my computer. Is that bad?" "Can you break into my boss' computer to delete an email I accidently sent him?" "My computer will not power on." (after some basic troubleshooting she says:) "Boy, its hard to see in here with no power in the building."
I've had each of these countless times. "My computer won't power up" eventually (after quite a while) becomes "oh well there's flooding so we had to close the entrance to patients"
Ahhh, the tales that could be told. In a move to streamline the business there was no IT support on location. Protocol was to call the "Help Desk". In Costa Rica. And hope to heaven you could get someone you could understand in the upper Midwest. Didn't take long to begin to refer to that support as the "Helpless Desk". I'm not really an '"IT" guy, I just know a little more than the average bear. Came into work one morning and all the managers are gathered in the production office. They wave me in and said don't bother trying to work, everything is down. Except email... Sure enough, no office network, no production network, hmmmm. Went up and let myself into the server room (with the "secret" hidden key) just to have a look. All the servers activity lights were winky, blinkin'. Went past the big UPS charger and battery and looked at the rack of switches. Three of the dozen and a half were dark. Well that's not right. what are the odds they fail simultaneously? Took a peek in back and followed all three power cords to a cheapie $5 power strip which was plugged into a UPS protected outlet. Nah... Can't be. Grabbed my outlet checker. UPS outlet was fine. Power strip was toast. Flipped the switch, tried the reset button. Nary a flicker. Dead. Funny thing was a few weeks prior we had some mercenary network installers put in a number of wireless access points. Each was protected by a small UPS nearest the switch the AP was using. Upstairs there apparently weren't enough of the main UPS outlets to plug there piggyback into so they used the power strip to make some room for their stuff. Funnier still was their protected UPS had 8 unused outlets that the switches could have used. I plugged the three dark switches in to those and watched everything light back up. Now for the very best part... I went back down to the managers huddle in the office, tossed the power strip on the desk and announced, "OK everyone! Coffee break is over, back to work!" They looked at me in disbelief. The plant manager said. "But there's a support team flying up from Texas!" to which I replied, "Better call 'em and tell 'em to turn around."
"In a move to streamline the business we got rid of the people who vaguely knew how our magic machines work and outsourced help to somewhere that barely spoke English" Ah, a true classic. I don't bother helping people with their PCs anymore.
Which above average intelligence bear is running around with an outlet checker? Just use the multimeter you left in the trunk of the car: for these occasions. Right next to my torx/hex set, alan keys, and ratcheting driver. /s (kinda)
@@dfunited1 Sure, I've got all that stuff around too. Really though, all I needed was a quick, reliable go/nogo check on the simplest, most obvious cause. No need to bring the whole squad when recon can clean things up in a sec.
@@XA-lm5oz That's part of what's gone wrong with America today. Everyone want compensation for every little thing. Just do your job plus whatever else comes at you that is within your capability. And don't be chest thumping or looking for a stroke either. If you're really doing the work folks know who it is. Skip the end zone dances and move along like you do it everyday. That outlook has served me well. Gotten me to places and jobs I most likely wouldn't have had if I'd chased them. Took a bit longer but it all happened and when it did I was practically bullet-proof.
I had too many funny moments working as a tech at my university's computer shop. The totally stupid ones, ok, amusing but mostly covered by those here. I had a uni professor come in and say he wanted to set up WiFi so he can get reception between his two offices. I asked how far is it between his offices? He said one is here in Melbourne, the other is in Sydney. Lol.
I once explained to a customer how to hook up monitor to a PC. He couldn't believe he needed two cables for his monitor since everything he knows works with only one. I was very patient and professional. The call took 40 minutes.
I've had similar calls. I don't work help desk, but I did do help desk duties during school closures. Apparently some teachers, parents, and students didn't realize that they need to charge their device in order for it to function from battery.
It's even "funnier" the other way around, when you're the unlucky sod who seems to be the only person in your 5000+ person company who keeps running into the most unexpected, exotic problems that you end up having to do IT and DevOp's job *for* them. I've lost count of the number of times people roll their eyes at my inability to do "simple, 5 minute" things, then try to show me how it's done, only for them to quickly realize theres a serious problem and they can't fix it either. It's frustrating, but kind of funny.
Tell me about it, there was some arcane virtualization error I dealt with for over a year where my machines time was off by one regardless of DST which lead to some occasional(read : unpredictable) if not extremely frustrating problems with git. IT man came over rolling his eyes at me thinking he was going to type "timedatectl set-ntp 1" and go back to jerking off before half of the sysadmin team got on board.
I seem to be that guy, apart from the "me having to do the IT guy's job for him" aspect. I run into some weird problem, I exhaust my limited understanding and ability to figure things out for myself from on-line searching, I sheepishly go to the gurus. They start out with a fairly obvious air of humouring the guy who's far too inept, but their "obvious" solution doesn't work. And then they start digging into things, and dig deeper, and deeper... I readily admit that in some respects, I'm in over my head: I don't have the background in IT that most of my colleagues do. But sometimes that means that I'm trying things the way our customers might, rather than what's "obvious" to my colleagues. And sometimes, truly, stuff just fails for me without my having done anything odd. In some respects it's useful for making our code robust; I've a knack for finding obscure bugs. But it's often frustrating.
I am that guy. Its become a meme to the point they no longer bother me if I'm on a 40 minute call. "Its probably one of those 1 in a million cases he always catches."
I am that guy, except I went into IT because of it, trying to solve my own issues constantly. Worked out well enough, but I do believe it gives me a predisposition to assuming those rare issues are more common than they are. 95% of the time it is exactly as simple as it looks, which is why they try the fast fixes first. Also saves time, money and resources going easy to hard instead of going for the instinct of the problem.
Once had a call where the person, used to sewing machines, was using the mouse as a foot pedal. The 90's transition into PC's for some people was completely alien but hilarious for us.
It took me about an extra year to update from dos to Windows because I was sure that needing a mouse was just a scam to get us to buy extra peripherals
That is gold! In the early ‘90s I worked at a national cultural institution (in Australia) that shall remain nameless and was part of a group developing what was then a ‘cutting edge’ educational resource on CD-ROM. Such was it’s novelty and significance that we received a visit from the relevant government Minister who was going to ‘test-drive’ the product for a media clip. So there we all are: production team, Minister, Minister’s minions, TV crew, reporters and whatnot - all crammed into our little office. Cameras start rolling. My boss gives a description of the product and invites the Minister to have a try. The Minister walks over to the desk, PICKS THE MOUSE UP OFF THE DESK AND AIMS IT AT THE SCREEN LIKE A TV REMOTE WHILST CLICKING FURIOUSLY, turns to my boss and says “It doesn’t appear to be working”.! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
One of my favorites was with a husband and a wife. The wife walks in with her laptop, mistakenly bringing her husband in along side her, and says there’s an issue with her laptop. See, she purchased the laptop from us. We have a warranty on all purchased devices. She insists that it’s an issue with the laptop and that we should fix it under warranty, and she says she’s certain of this since she’s a self-professed “technical person”. I look down at the laptop she had set on the counter, I open the laptop up, and I notice the power button indicator light is slowly dimming and brightening. I then hold the power button down for 10 seconds, click it once more, and it fires right up. I concluded that it was hibernate mode. I at least think it was hibernating. Also, the settings suggested that as well. Anyway, the *reaction* I got out of her husband by doing that was priceless. He goes, “I thought you were technical! HAHAHAHAHA!” And then he kept ripping on her as they left. She took it well, but that was very funny.
Ahhh tech support. Been there. "No madam, there is no way the computer is already booted up, wait, did you turn off the monitor, no you have to turn off the computer. It's going to be the big beige box, it's probably on the floor... no I can't actually see your desk from here."
I once had a person calling in because their internet wasn't working. Upon asking them to check the ethernet cables on the modem, they said, "Hold on. It's hard to get to because I mounted it under the table." Turns out, they put sheetrock screws THROUGH the modem to mount it to the table.
Unless you have actually worked in IT, you wouldn't ever understand. Even if you think you understand, you don't. not even close. I could write a book with the stories... The face that he makes is absolutely perfect. I have made that face before. It's not a face of anger, disbelief, or even annoyance. It's a face of momentary physical pain. It's caused when the stupidity is so thick, and so powerful that it actually bridges the gap between the non-physical thought realm and the physical world, and for a fleeting moment it materializes, takes on mass and form, slaps you across the face, then POOF, disappears as quick as it came. Like a spirit in the night. It's like receiving a short electrical shock. It's actually jarring. I'm not joking. That shock and physical pain only comes after years of working in it. If you have only worked in it for a short time, you wont have truly experienced the "jarring" effect yet. You'll think you have, but trust me, you haven't. Just remember what I've said here some years from now...
Somebody last week put a ticket in because their cellphone was taking pictures upside down. The solution was for her to turn her camera upside down while taking pictures
I once talked myself out of a job in an IT support office, the job was to provide documentation for an office package that predated Microsoft's offering by at least 5 years, written by civil servants. My job was to be, packaging up 3 inch thick bundles of line-printer output into a "book" and posting it out to the users when they requested it over the equivalent of email, via post office landlines and modems. I said: Why don't you just send them the file via the landlines and they can print it off?" Stunned silence. Didn't get the job.
Heard a story from a coworker who was at a rollout of new software at a hospital that when a nurse was having issues, he asked her to double click on a specific folder. She asked how to do that and he said to move the mouse over to the file and click it twice. She lifted the mouse off the table, held it up to the picture of the folder and clicked...
A similar thing happened to me. I told the guy to move the mouse up and he literally raised it off the desk! To be fair if you're not familiar with these things I imagine it's extremely confusing at first.
during my 3 months in tech support, I had both types of customers, as well as everything in between. The first I was taught during training was to ask the customer "have you tried powering it off and on again?". I genuinly had to start every single converssation with that question, and every now and then the situation depicted in the video did occur. I wish I was kidding.
We manufactured color analysis instruments for various industries. One day I get a call asking to diagnose a failure in their new light-booth. Go through the symptoms until I asked "There's a long black cord at the back of the booth. Is it connected to the wall?" All I heard was a 'click'. Wish I'd known THIS script back then!
A call centre agent rushed me to her workstation once, screaming that she couldn't enter an order because her keyboard wasn't working and the customer was waiting on the line for over 10 mins. I ran to her workstation and she had put her phone on they keyboard's numpad... I explained to her that the phone was pushing down on all the keys and that's why her keyboard wasn't working. She thought about it for a while and then she said that she didn't care for those keys because she rarely ever used them... 🤦🤦♀️🤦♂️
There are so many stories from car mechanics about customers saying their engine keeps shutting off or some of the levers on the steering wheel are not working, just because all the stuff on their key ring gets in the way or pulls on the ignition key.
I had someone who was adamant their password wasn't working, I could see their screen and asked them to type the password in to the application. I couldn't see anything happening for about 15 mins I asked to try again and nothing was happening on screen. I could type the password on their screen but when they did it NOTHING happened. Their keyboard worked fine. I ultimately asked "Where are you typing your password?" to which they replied "On a piece of paper" Outsourcing! It's the future, apparently.
I better understand now than I did before, that it actually is very important for IT people to start off with asking such things as is it turned on and is it plugged in. Thank you all of you IT people who have put up with nonsense at your job. It is not always easy for a person to realize that user error is so commonly the problem. Or maybe 98% of the time, It is difficult for them to realize that they messed up or missed something. I now I'm having Weird Al Yankovic's parody "All About the Pentiums" come to mind🙂 definitely worth a listen if you've never heard it.
My best story was working Tier 1 for a small network management company and getting a call from one particular customer. When the other guys in the office heard who was on the line, most grinned and one chuckled while walking away. The guy was the owner of his particular company and notorious for getting malware and virus' all the time because he would browse porn at work. This was one such call. I remote in, clean up his system and disconnect while he was at lunch. A short time later he calls back saying his bookmarks aren't working and wants me to look at it for him. I remote back in and take a look. I'd say half of his bookmarks were porn sites. I had to open up each website, visible on my screen and fix the bookmarks. Our CIO's office was right behind my desk and he had a window that looked out at my station. Luckily he was a really cool guy so all he did was message me while I'm doing all of this and give me crap the whole time. The kicker of this whole thing was before I disconnected the guy calls me to thank me for taking care of that for him. HE WATCHED THE WHOLE TIME.
I helped a fella set up a second monitor remotely last year (initially by guiding him - and the two colleagues he'd asked for help - on how to plug it in). When I'd finished configuring their orientation in Windows settings the guy asked me when he would be receiving his second mouse and keyboard.
I have never laughed so hard at a TV show as I did watching The IT Crowd! I laughed so hard I cried, then I couldn't see the picture through the tears, and I'd have to pause it to wipe my eyes! Back in the day, Fawlty Towers had me rolling with laughter too, but this is even better.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
Whenever we showed up on a PCIT issue, and we had been digging in the system for just 5 minutes the manager would show up and ask what is wrong. Our answer was one that we used by one of our best techs and I used it to end of my 38 year career..."Something broke somewhere"... Proved a successful answer for decades to the Process Managers to leave us alone while we figured out what was really broke.
Been working in IT for a very long time and hearing the audience laugh at the jokes that are a reality to us always made me laugh even harder. I wish they did more jokes about ID10T and PEBCAC errors. One of my favorite memories in my career was when my manager answered a question from a director about “Who’s responsibility it is to manage a certain software suite” . My manager, with a deadpan delivery” said go in the bathroom and look above the sink. Lol! The Richmond character is spot on as well. To all the non-IT people, us nerds do care and work hard for you. While we are fixing your Ethernet connection please don’t rest coffee cups on our back or worse sit down and start doing other work at the desk we are under. That last one happens and it’s really weird.
Not really a tech support story but similar, back in 2003 or 2004 I was working at an Internet Cafe Teaching basic IT usage one on one from what the icons were and did to Microsoft office etc, anyway for a few months this guy shows up once a week to take the course and he was pretty strange to say the least, for a start he only trusted a Gemini and of course that turned out to be me (regret to have admitted it) so i was thrust forward into this venture with him, he tended to be pretty loud and manic during the hour i would attempt to teach him in (always a big sigh when he walked in) he used to bring in piles of newspaper clippings for me to scan so the he could e-mail then to various authorities and government representatives (no idea why) he barely even bothered with the course, after a while he mentions to me that he has bought a computer and that he could not get it working, so i talked him through the steps he had taken to set his system up monitor, mouse, keyboard, modem, yes to all, but that he could not figure out where to plug it all in to, then it dawned on me, i pointed to the tower unit and asked you do have this don't you? he replied whats that? i could have strangled him...
When I was in 'university' many years ago (we call it Hoge School, perhaps 'School of Higher Learning' it's a good bit below the level of actual university but anyway) There was a small room with half a dozen Apple computers so it was a rather popular spot. There was also a printer so it was an even more popular spot. However, with so many students printing stuff out, the toner would often run out so it would not work again untill the toner had been refilled. Whenever I noticed it, I walked upstairs to IT and explained the toner had run out again. In fact, it often was empty when I entered the room I mean, I never ran out of toner because I never printed that much stuff. So the nice chap from IT would check the printer, find that indeed the toner had run out, which he then refilled. After which, the printer always went into overdrive and started handling all the earlier print requests so dozens or hundreds of pages would literally fly out. Because most students probably responded in a different way when they found the printer would not print. Huh? Okay, press 'print' again. And again, And again, And again, And again, And again, And again, Etc.. Finally they would reach the conclusion they weren't going to get anything printed that day so they simply packed up their stuff and left. Without even informing IT to refill the toner in which case they could have happily continued printing and printing and printing!!!
@@els4044 Simpelweg niet op 'print' klikken als je ziet dat iet niet print? En het even melden bij systeembeheer een trap naar boven is ook geen optie?
@@AudieHolland Ja, maar dat duurt even voordat je dat snapt. Ik heb hetzelfde met mijn eigen printer gehad die niet wilde printen en toen die het wel deed bleef hij maar blaadjes spugen. Maar het is toch snel opgelost als je naar printerinstellingen gaat en je alle opdrachten cancelled. Het verbaasd me dat dat probleem door de it-er niet in 3 minuten opgelost was.
I swear I am Moss everyday of my life. I try so hard to make computers not seem like magic when I talk to people, I give short easy to understand examples, use layman's terms and answer any questions... but all i ever get is, glazed over look and I just know in there head they are screaming ""OH GOD PLEASE DON'T TEACH ME ANYTHING!" so sad, so so sad.
the problem with them not learning what I'm trying to teach them is, they will call back in for the same exact issue. There are people that call in so often you essentially end up doing their job for them. A lot of IT call center positions are hardly IT related, it is a position with an actual thinking person on the line because half the people calling are not. Like when your error message tells you to call a specific department for support, but you call the general line, or it tells you the EXACT thing you are doing wrong and you keep doing it!
Oh, my god you're _soooo_ smart, you must be a computer genius. I don't understand anything (because I refuse to bother learning for five minutes). - Every single person I talk to about computers.
The worst thing is when I call IT, do everything they say, and it doesn't work, so they come, and I watch them do the exact same thing I did, and suddenly it works... Magic. It just feels like I'm making fun of them.
We get a lot of "my computer isn't working the screen says no signal"...my standard reply is "turn the PC on"..... but one of my favourites is enjoying remoting in and taking control of a users computer when they call to say they can't find a program (as it's not in their recently used programs list so clearly doesn't exist on the PC anymore) and showing them where the All Programs/All Apps button is....You know... the button that appears when you click the start button.... It's usually at this point I wonder how they manage to dress themselves.... or make toast....
Heh, back in elementary school, I remembered I used Ctrl + Alt + Delete to try to fix a problem. I was apparently perceived to be a computer genius by both my fellow students and my teacher. Funny times, heh-heh.
"im sorry are you from the past?" one of my favourite lines just as good as the episode he gets fed up with asking "have you tried turning it on and off again?" then follows it with "have you tried sticking it up your arse?"
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
In middle school, I had a basic computer class, but my friend and I passed on almost entirely extra credit for fixing the computers. The teacher was always amazed that we were able to do it so fast. The only problem that ever occurred was that the same 7 or 8 kids kept swinging their legs under the desk and kicking the power cable loose. The only other thing that occurred was one time a student (and the teacher) were convinced that a computer was broken, because it was making noise but wasn't displaying anything. The monitor was off.
I also started my career in a hospital IT department (wow living the dream) and I was like Moss, but I've since learned to teach people instead of confusing them! I had to build my own workstation from the weirdest setup of a scavenged laptop with an extra screen, external floppy and CD, guitar amp for speakers etc. The department was also in a basement and the office manager knew nothing about what the technicians actually repaired. He was called John though not Jen!
+The Staggy Yup, had that, too, in my time in IT. The best thing was the "excuse": "Eh, I don't know anything about computers. Just as you don't know anything about the optical instruments I work with every day, because you don't work with them". Uh, yeah, good thing you don't work with computers, eh?
+The Staggy I remember trying to do that with someone, and then I told them "hit the windows key on your keyboard, its on the bottom left between control and alt" and I got the response, "there's no control key"
+Linkxsc I don't know how these people go about their daily work. In my case I just tell them to click the ''circle with colours in the bottom left corner'' and hope they don't open Chrome/Firefox.
+Andre Sampaio My personal favorite is, "My monitor is stuck on a black screen." "Can you check if it's plugged in?" "I would, but I can't see anything." "Huh? Why?" "The power's out."
And here am I, a daughter of an IT guy. When I'm at work and encounter a problem with my computer I need to check everything a million times just to be on the safe side that when I finally call the helpdesk, there is an actual problem to deal with and not just my stupidity.
The vast majority of IT support is various degrees of turning things off and on again. Sometimes Windows needs to clear it's memory, sometimes it needs a power cycle, sometimes it's knowing which individual process needs to be forcefully shut down, sometimes it's a reboot to apply a patch, sometimes a user locked a shared system and no one can log in, sometimes it's to refresh policy settings, sometimes you need to clear an error code, sometimes it's to spite the user...
These days IT support is layered, so if you, the customer, have a real problem, you end up at Level 3, about 45 minutes after you called in. By then, you're ready to kill.
I forgot the starting point. You go blue in the face circling through the company's website, trying to dodge stupid FAQs and irrelevant Community Forums until you finally find a phone number. Or not, in some cases.
I have a copy somewhere of Harry Enfield doing the start-up sounds for our Apple computers in a dealership back in the 80’s in Baker St.. He was a great customer and a lot of fun. Plenty of you ‘don’t want to do that’.
I was repairing a PC that belonged to my girlfriend's sister and she was so focused at me like I'm doing a surgery so i told her bring me a napkin and she jumped and brought one, then i said wipe sweat off my forehead and she did it seriously, i was expecting for a laugh but they were dead serious 😂
One guy once told me if a person was being a jerk then it was a “penalty reboot” they would just make the person do that while they went for coffee or just sat around .... it was sort of like a timeout 😂🤣
i am IT help desk for a big corporation. i have the power to kick people off. restart there computers and even delete all there stuff. there are plenty of times where if a user argues with me on what is the proper troubleshooting or they just dont read or listen to what i say i will just force a restart on there computer. normally takes them 30 mins to log back in and when they call or chat back in i ask them if they are still having the issue and they say no and just want a ticket number. there was one guy that pissed me off so much i said i need to rebuild his citrix profile. but never told him his stuff will not move over to the other profile. they are supposed to keep there files in a network drive and not on the computer desktop anyway. so i went ahead and did the reset and deleted all this stuff. i had a copy of his stuff on a back up drive already but told him he had to submit a ticket and it will take a few days to get restored once he saw all the files where gone.
Jonathan thanks for letting me know that.... I’m a bit of a dinosaur but always knew the person on the other end was really trying to help me. Keep up the great work ✌🏼
Had co-worker continually asking others how to download 'torrent' files from the company' s T1 line to his new laptop. One computer-savvy co-worker advised he search for the System 32 file and delete it - thinking NO ONE would do that. Well, he DID. 2nd worker spent the next day restoring worker 1's system!
I have more IT stories than I can count, more often the problems were easy but dealing with the public was the worse. One customer was a bit of a shut in and owned cats, her computer room doubled as the litter box. Another customer answered the door wearing a pistol. Another memorable one was a young women answering the door in a nightgown that was practically see-thru. Needless to say its hard to concentrate surrounded by a bunch of half naked drunk sorority chicks.
I sat within earshot of the IT office and, as a guy who was better with computers than my coworkers, I couldn't help but laugh whenever I heard some of their complaints. I am not IT good but the number of times the problem was solved with "is it plugged in?" was surprising.
I used to travel around the us fixing servers, networks, etc for hospitals. One hospital would have network issues every now and then for years. No one could figure it out. They wrote it off as a weird quirk of that hospital because the problem persisted with different software and hardware. New admin came in, they wanted it fixed, made a huge deal about it so me and a few other people from various departments were sent out to fix it. I was in the attic tracing cables when I see in the corner a blueish hue coming from a ceiling tile. I go over and look down. I'm not kidding you there is a server in this small room completely enclosed. The hospital admin years back did a remodel for a MRI unit at the hospital (you have to build the room around the unit), and redid the entire radiology, lab wings. In doing so they walled up this old closet that has this old AIX machine and it's been spitting out dhcp it's as it was the domain controller ever since. They never took the old server offline and put in new hardware, old admin left along with the original IT quit so it was forgotten about.
I accidentally got tricked into doing tech support once, I lasted the 15 minutes it took listening to the guy I was supposed to replace take exactly one phone call.
I once had a call from a rather angry client stating XXX branch was down and it was all our fault (as per usual - you get my drift). Turned out the branch had decided to do a refurbishment, and rather than have someone come in to move the NTU, wandered off to their local supplier to pick up a phone extension cord to run to the new location. Humble pie was consumed that day. Not sure if that was my favorite, or the building contractor that yanked off the entire MDF, and sheered off the main feed flush against the wall. Queue calls to the council, permitting, traffic control, digging up footpaths, and a very very large bill...
Moss = How I feel at the start of a job
Roy = How I feel a year later
Moss: how I feel at 9am.
Roy: how I feel at 10am
Moss=crab
Roy= wait that makes no sense
accurate
@@shootmcrunfast you have a busy cosplay life.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
Quoting my IT teacher ... "99% of the computer problems sit in front of one." 😂
He used to say "The problem is usually between the keyboard and the chair"
PEBCAK
@@kamran_b3189 I deal with a lot of PICNIC and ID:10T errors where I work.
In france we call that the "Chair to keyboard interface issue" XD
OSI layer 8 problem
At a large hospital in the North West where I was in IT. Caller: I can't get anything on the screen and I know it's switched on because the light on the monitor is on. Me: OK, Let's check if the lead from the monitor to the computer is plugged in correctly. Have a look round the back of the monitor and see if you can see two cables coming out of the back. Caller: NO! I'll get a shock. You're trying to give me an electric shock! Me: No I'm not, please let's just check the cables and I promise you won't get a shock. Caller: Not likely, you'll have to come down here and fix it. So I wandered over to her office and was surprised to find the monitor was there but the computer wasn't. I asked where the computer was and she said 'Oh, they took that bit away for repair yesterday'.
LOL)))
Please tell me that this person didn't have any lives depending on them.
Jesus christ 😂 I was in a hospital on IT once as well, but the people who were calling at least admitted, that they don’t know anything about computers and tried to learn some stuff 😂 but there was one woman, that had problem with connecting her phone on the wifi, and when me and my boss (I wasn’t employed there, I had my practical studium there) got there, he told me to explain her the phone and he is going to check the computer and one machine connection, because that wasn’t working either. He fixed it in seconds, as it needed just pluging the cable, and click on the icon 😂 the we stayed there for 10 minutes, before I explained here what to do with the wifi, as you needed to log yourself on the browser (I don’t remember the name of that security config) and then explain her why it does so
"that bit"
god bitches be fuckin stupid
Gordon Jackson
" she said 'Oh, they took that bit away for repair yesterday'."
And that's why it's best to work for a third party ie: the manufacture/maintainer.
That will be £48 call out, £248 labour, all excluding vat, because there's nothing wrong apart from you are an idiot.
I did ask if I could add a "stupid tax" but was told no :(
Always makes you feel better to punish stupid with a large bill.
"User Error, replace user and continue".
"Are you from the past?" I need to remember that one.
Technically we all are from the past and heading for the future... :D
We are all from the past. I once called IT support after waiting 30 minutes to log in. I suggested to a disinterested IT berk that he needed to go down into the cellar and whip the stokers to shovel more coal into the Mr Charles Babbage's Great Shoeburyness Difference Engine.
'Eh' he replied...I hung up and went to dine at my club in Mayfair.
The problem is you can never be that rude unfortunately. Just got to take it with a grin.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@PORRRIDGE_GUN Marvellous haha, you certainly did show that miserable lout what a true upscale sense of humour is like, all the more pity for him not being able to comprehend your finely crafted guffaw. I hope the gents at the club showed a bit more appreciation for the old "coal-powered IT infrastructure" line, what an absolute killer. You sir, are a genuine comedic talent.
My two favorites:
1. Upper level executive, when a program he launches from his desktop wouldn't work, I needed to figure out where it was located. I asked him to right-click the icon. His response, "Don't get technical with me!"
2. Working warranty support for a computer manufacturer, got a ticket to fix a computer under warranty. Of course, if it's not a warranty issue, the company that owns the system has to pay for the service call. The problem is nothing comes on the screen at all when the computer is turned on. Called the user and asked him to confirm the monitor is plugged into the computer. I said, "I'd hate for it to be a simple issue that will end up costing us both time and you money." He got pissed and said, "Of course I checked it! Get out here and fix it!" No problem! On my way. Walked up to the desk, plugged the monitor into the computer, verified it worked and had him sign the invoice for the service call.
That first one is why Apple mice don't even have a right click button, they just click the whole mouse. That second one is why . . . well, let me tell you a story. Back when I was going to school to get my mechatronics degree, I had the pleasure of being taught by some of the best professors in the business. One of them would always tell us "check that it has power before you do anything else." He was talking about sensors, but still. I've heard the story more than once from him that a fellow would call from the factory floor, multimeter in hand, and go "my sensor isn't working." So my professor would ask "what's the voltage going to the sensor?" "12 volts. What, do you think I didn't measure it?" "No, I need to know, 12 point what? It's for the form here that I have to fill out." About 2 minutes later, the fellow on the floor would invariably go "hey, figured out the problem" and hang up, having discovered the sensor didn't have power.
Now, IDK what you could ask the fellow on the other end that would produce the same response, but it seems to me that there should be something along those lines. Maybe ask for the color of the light by the power button? If it isn't even on, then we've got a rather obvious problem there. If you turn the monitor on and it's not connected to a PC, most modern monitors will display a rather prominent "device not connected" message, so that's a self diagnosing issue as well. If those fail, attempt to turn the PC off and on again, which will solve the issue if the PC was never on in the first place.
With stubborn people, you have to hold their hand and take them on a walk through fields of wildflowers, otherwise they'll just hunker down, refuse to check, obstruct any efforts to fix the problem, and just generally waste time, money, and effort in an attempt to not look stupid. In some businesses, that attitude can lead to deaths, like the various miscalibrated radiotherapy machines that killed via radiation overdose, all because the technician who miscalibrated the machine in the first place refused to check his work, on the grounds that he obviously did it right the first time. There's a guy rotting in jail at this very minute because of that, I'm 90% certain.
You talking about Therac-25? That wasn't because of a technician not doing their due diligence, it was a software error because the company very stupidly assumed they wouldn't need to update some of their code because "it works" even though they updated other parts of it. The result is was a race condition in which if the technician didn't do things at exactly the right time patients could be administered lethal doses of radiation.
@@CrizzyEyes yes and no. I don't know the specific details of each incident, but I do know that patients have been administered lethal doses of radiation on at least 3 separate occasions, all resulting in similar death tolls over similar time-frames.
As terrible as it is though, the mechanics of that incident are damn interesting.
@@mage3690 That sounds like it, in reality there were 6 cases where they were held accountable for poisoning a patient, but only 3 of them were lethal. Apparently the software was always buggy but they had hardware locks to prevent lethal dosages before, then arrogantly removed them because "the software works" even though they had no testing suite at all. It's one of the most absurd cases of arrogance and recklessness you'll ever read about in engineering
I love when people ask for help and then get annoyed when help is provided
I once spent more than half an hour on the phone with a client that was upset that their website was down. Their website was up and running just fine. I asked them to go to a computer and check, and they said that they couldn't. I asked them why, but they didn't tell me. I asked them if they could go to another office in the building to check, and they said that wouldn't work either. I finally got them to explain that they believed that their website had to be down because the computers in their office weren't working. I explained that their website ran on computers outside of their office, but they didn't believe me. After about the tenth time asking them why their office computers weren't working, they shouted in frustration "because our power is out!" To this day I have no idea how they expected me to get their website back up if their idea of "our website runs on a computer in our office" was correct when the entire area was in a blackout.
Most people truly think IT can fix everything lol. I work as an IT staff (mostly software dev, but I do troubleshoot too if anything in the office went 'wrong'), one time my coworker ask me why she can't registering a new accounts to a certain website (it was stationary ecommerce web). I noticed it need captcha, but the captcha doesn't work somehow and she ask me to fix it. The thing is that website is somebody else's website so I have no access to it (hell I don't even know who made it or who's the owner it) so I suggest her to call the number of that company yet she insisted that I should fix that because according to her "IT people must be know how to fix this kind of things". I literally just left her desk, back to my desk and wear earphone so she wont bother me again lol.
@@rchrch4922 Maybe they see IT worker as a magician or wizard who can fix anything with a spell.
About twenty years ago I was working at a computer repair shop. On one occasion I received a call from a woman who explained that her computer wouldn't turn on and asked if there was anything that I could do to help her over the phone. While walking her through the basic things that one would check, she made a comment that she couldn't see very well because the power was out. I had to dig real deep to find a nice way to explain how the power outage was directly related to the state of her computer. It was a painful experience. My career in the tech support industry has left me with many such stories of an equally disturbing nature, but I can't share any more of them with you right now because thinking about them is making me sad.
@@solosecondhandstore5087 “Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.”
I once had to do an onsite fix to a lawyer bufette cause one of their newer computer was making "weird noise".. my boss said "just go and do what she says , she will pay anything and doesnt listen to our advise" .. so i went there.. she pointed the computer and said "its making noise!" ... all i could hear was the regular fan noise .. so i told her and she answers "no look. the other computers dont make noise.. this is not normal!" ..
turned out the other computers in her office were really old office rigs with passive heating.. no nearly fans.. so they were more quieter.. she just had got a newer computer with CPU fan and she couldnt process that.. and as my boss said she just paid the full going there and "cleaning" the computer fan just in case .. he also told me later that she generated a LOT of work cause she used really old outdatter stuff and refused to upgrade.. they had even offered her new stuff at discount to help but she refused and prefered to pay a lot more to keep old stuff running
It took me years before I realized that Moss' "Did you try forcing an unexpected reboot?" is essentially asking the caller to turn it off and on again.
+silvercomic I didnt know that thanks mate :)
+silvercomic technically speaking, an unexpected reboot is different from just turning it off and on, rather it's forcibly powered off and on again
+silvercomic Well, sort of. Unexpected reboot means you don't go via the normal path of letting it do a proper system shutdown. It means you cut the power then restart it, either by hitting the reset button or holding the power button down for 10 seconds.
I got it instantly, just put two and two together to see Moss saying what Roy says except the Moss version
I'm sorry to tell you that, but unexpected reboot means the Restart Button. Turning it on and off is completely different action. I hope that it won't take you years to understand the difference between those 2 actions.
Some things never change. Back in the days when personal computers were a distant dream, personal music players were called "transistor radios". As an electronics student I was frequently asked to fix someone's radio. My standard reply was "put in a new set of batteries, and I'll have a look at it". I never had a follow up call.
Back in the early 70's, working for a music shop, housecall on faulty organ....
She - 'Have you found the problem ?'
Me - 'Yeah, just one of the transistors needs replacing'
She - 'Wot, so it's got a lot of radios in it, then ?................
How to tell someone you are old without saying you are old?
@@codefeenix Based on years of observation (and being properly old), I have noticed that Middle Age is the point where being warm becomes more important than being cool.
@@plrndl being cool is overrated; it's just a bunch of peacock flaunting.
I miss the tube tester at the hardware store...
Does anyone still come here?
Anyway, my personal most favourite story was a customer calling in, because her internet connection wasn't working. It was an elderly lady, so she really had no experience whatsoever. I asked her which lights on her router were glowing and she said she needed to go and look. So I waited. She then apologized, saying that she had to go way back, because she had placed the router "back in the cupboard". When I asked her to specify, she explained to me that she had done just as the flyer said, she plugged the router in and waited for three days. (That was the time we needed to set the maximum speed for our customers at the time). Now, according to her logic she kept the router plugged in for three days (the flyer literally said "keep connected for 3 conseclusive days", indicating that it should not be dis- or reconnected during this time), and that would somehow "charge" the internet. She then unplugged the thing, thinking that it was "finished charging" and put it in a cupboard, so it wouldn't be standing around needlessly. I then explained to her that the router needs to stay connected in order to work and that we had only set the speed during the first three days. 😅😅 I thought that her idea was kind of endearing.
Plot twist, she's from the future and all routers use 8G technology and are powered by black mater fuel
@@mateusmercer2280 or are so energy efficient that the wifi itself powers them through electromagnetic emissions: THAT will be real wifi!
It's cute, but still completely illogical. I guess some people *REALLY* don't understand how things work. Or don't try to figure any of it out on their own. I guess we all do this to a certain extent in a area we know nothing about.
I assume she also didn't understand how wired phones work.
I got a new device a few months back. Came with a power cord. I plugged it in and waited an hr for it to charge so I could use it. Unplugged it, cause it should be charged by now, and went to use it. It took me longer than it should to realize that it wasn’t chargeable and had to remain plugged in.
I.T. support for just over 30 years. Seen it all. Best story.
Came in early one day to swap out a workstation before the employee gets to his desk. I transfer his home folder to the new Mac and head back to his desk 5 minutes before he's due in.
As I step into his cubicle, he's already there, tapping on his keyboard, clicking his mouse, staring at the blank monitor screen.
I say, "Would you like me to hook up the new machine?". He turns, seeing the computer in my hand and his eyes pop. "No wonder it wouldn't wake up from sleep." , He says as he notices, finally, the empty spot on his desk where the computer should have been.
I've had the same feeling😂
When I first started I was working in a repair shop and I dunno , must've been in my first week or my second , I had this lovely old lady come in and ask me if we sold replacement cup holders. I knew right at that moment I would have work for the rest of my life.
My funniest story was when I was working at a chemical company. I had a call from one of the lab technicians, saying her inkjet printer wasn't working (which was a common problem with them in the 90s, they were properly temperamental buggers). On entering the lab, I met the frustrated tech who proceeded to tell me she'd tried everything; turning it off and on again, reloading the paper, checking the cartridges, even shouting at it. Now for some reason I can't explain, I found myself asking if she'd tried being nice to it and, when she looked at me like I'd lost the plot, I explained that printers perform better if they're shown a bit of love. I turned to the printer, patted it gently and said, "Are you going to work for me, please?" I sent the print job to it and, lo and behold, it printed out straight away. The funny part was two weeks later, when I bumped into her colleague, who told me he'd just watched her stroking her printer and talking to it like it was a cherished pet dog! I can't believe she actually fell for it!!
I got out of IT support after 15 years and moved into consultancy, when I finally got fed up of people telling me my job can't be that hard because they had a Windows PC at home.
leopold If that story is true, it's actually adorable, haha
Not a word of a lie, Dorsal. It's my personal "truth is stranger than fiction" story :)
There's a rule when it comes to tech support, similar to Sod's Law. If you've got a competent techie on the line, you can guarantee that they will talk to a total idiot. If you're an end user who isn't a complete moron when it comes to computers, you'll end up with the thickest/laziest tech support guy/woman of all. It's not always the case, of course, but it often seems to be.
666NedFlanders It's not pre-canned responses that I have an issue with. The issue I have is when you contact tech support with a specific problem, it takes them two months to solve it (when it is an issue affecting your entire flat), and they decide to "fix" things that were similar to what you asked for, but actually had nothing to do with it (making networking changes for an Xbox One when I said my Xbox 360 was one of the things not working on the network).
Oh, and yeah, "please contact your admin" messages suck enormously. Still, they're more useful than an error message I got whilst working on a Toshiba laptop; "The installation is failure. Please make sure its reason then retry install" - and yes, that was an official Toshiba program/driver.
+Lukeno52 As someone with *some* PC savvy (i.e. far from expert, but some!) I fully endorse your concept and suddenly everything in the World makes sense.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers.
And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back.
If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else.
FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design.
THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@noneone8726 jesus can you not read or something? Your response, which you copy pasted in many threads, is completely unrelated to what the person said, and cannot be a real response.
Shit, I'm talking to a bot aren't I.
@@noneone8726 Sometimes the customer is right. Other times, the customer tries to use a CD drive as a cupholder.
"You do know how a button works don't you? No, not on clothes."
lol
I missed that line 😂
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@JZ's Best Friend I'm sorry, are you from the past?
@@noneone8726 um.... i think you responded to the wrong comment, sweetie.
edit: Also that's utter bullshit. Just sayin. "The customer is always right" is the mentality that creates Karens.
@JZ's Best Friend .........what?
LOL, I just started working as a computer technician. You would be surprised how often you have to tell them to turn the computer on. Not just rebooting, but a lot of the time the computer will actually be turned off, and they cannot figure out why it's not working...
Yes I can vouch for that too. One time someone asked me to help when all that was wrong was the monitor was in standby...
that will be your main solution bro you will see
Junior Santiago Fortunately my job is a bit demanding than that. Yeah sure 25% of the time a quick power cycle will fix it, but I have to deal with a lot of old POS(point of sale, though piece of shit works too) equipment that fails all the time. Some of these systems still use 8 bit hardware, they're that old...
Phlaked Corn I am glad to get out of IT.
But, things will go a lot better if you are nice to the users. IT guys have a bad wrap as being jerks, so people appreciate the kindness (at least in my experience) good luck!
Do you use an Irish accent?
Worked in IT for my life in a car factory, two of my best stories:
1 . Guy calls me up , tells me his computer doesn't work. Ok I say, well I'll go out and see what's the problem, when I get there I see it and I say: "Mhm, well dude, there is a hole the size of my hand on the side of the PC...." he says, yes, a forklift hit it, but I should fix it because it doesn't work...
2. Guy calls us up, tells us their printer doesn't work, OK, collague and me go out and see what's up at the logistiks office. We get there and see that the printer has been damaged. Pretty clear cut, they hit it with something so I say, wait here I'll get the papers, you fill it out we take it away and your department can pay for repairs. I go to the car to get the papers but when I get back the printer is nowhere to be found (huge office printer), so I ask the same people there , where is printer? They say what printer, they have no idea what I am talking about.... OK, I have better things to do, I leave them, the printer is not ours, if they loose it, it's on them anyway. A few hours later our boss comes in and asks us if we know something because he got a call from the company's home factory from Germany as to "Who the fuck packaged a fucking printer with the engines on the train??"
"with the engines on the train"
What? I don't quite follow.
@@crackwitz Pretty sure their company makes engines and it was shipped with the cargo instead of being send for repairs.
I once told a guy to close all his "Windows"... He then stood up, walked around his house closing all of the windows around the actual house.
And what else was he supposed to do , sirrah? Perchance he was sitting in a draft. Ever think of that? Durr
XD, Sounds like a computer exorcism
Must have watched "my blackberry is not working"
i used to work for America online. almost all problems were "well is it plugged in? well plug it in then."
Adam M That job must have been terrible. You had to deal with idiots all day and then take customer calls.
My first helpdesk job I had a lady call in because her computer didn't work. I went to her desk and she simply hadn't pushed the power button on the computer. She had been trying the monitor. She actually got really mad at me since she was so embarrassed.
A few years later I had the exact same issue with a different user. This time the person was embarrassed as well but instead of being a jerk, they were apologetic.
Several years later I had another similar incident. I tried so hard with the lady. The woman called in claiming her computer was dead. I asked all the right questions. She assured me that the computer had lights on. She told me that the monitor had a power light lit. She guaranteed me that the power strip was turned on. I drove to the site. I walked through the building and into her office, looked at the power strip, clicked the power switch to the on position, and walked away. As I passed her I simply said, "Your power strip was off."
I had a lot of great stories while working in ISP IT support like 10 years ago. I guess I've could wrote a book about that times.
Top two:
1. Once an eighty-year-old woman called me in support and complained that the Internet was not working. I prepared for an hour-long conversation, as based on my experience, such cases have always been extremely difficult. Difficult - because it is almost impossible to explain how the Internet works to an elderly person. Instead, granny cheerfully inquired about her network settings, complaining that the network connection switched to DHCP instead of static IP. I told her the network settings, after which everything worked, and it took like 3 minutes. I was amazed.
2. Once a person called asking for drivers for a network card issued by our company when connecting computers to the Internet. At the same time, he mentioned that he uses linux, to which I replied that unfortunately, we do not support linux (at that time we only worked with windows machines). The dude was upset, thanked me and hung up. I left a comment in the system about his call and soon forgot about this case. A week later, he calls support again and gets on me. Complains that the Internet is not working. I look at the comment in the system left by me, I remember this situation and just in case I repeat that we do not have drivers for linux. He replies, "don't worry, I just need network settings, I have already written drivers for the network card myself."
Oh wow, the second story, actually so cool
that's what linux is for
@#2 he did? that's crazy cool
You placed your words very finely in a sentence. It feels like i’m reading a novel. 😄
Did the company bought his code?
I recall resizing a window for someone. She went crazy with excitement that was possible. Best career ever lol
I've had numerous teachers be amazed at the fact that you can move windows across different monitors using extended mode. Definitely helped a lot of them during distance learning. And at the same time, I had several teachers be completely confused with even attempting to drag a window across. I have a lot of patience most of the time, but some of them couldn't even understand how to do it, no matter how many times I sat with them and showed them step by step. One of them just gave up within the first few minutes of the demo.
Did she continue to talk to you after that?
My professor said whenever he was forced to fix silly things he would tell the person asking, "Oh yeah it was an ID-10T problem. You are good now." And no one ever realized what he was saying XD
Its an XTP Colactron
@@KaityKat117 I was told about pebcak from a college professor, the most important code in IT
@@KaityKat117 or picnic (problem in chain not in computer)
Or nobody felt confident enough to show they understood the insult. That phrase has been around far longer than PCs and I saw it referred to with military forms.
..and THAT is why he is a TEACHER now. Don't talk down to or insult your users... You will wind up as a "professor"....
When this first aired I couldn't believe what I was watching. I started in IT as a field service engineer in 1970 and finished my sentence in 2000. I feel as though I've met every character in this amazing series.
Working Tech support for an IT department in an elementary school district. Overheard a colleague trying to walk a teacher thru a problem she was having with her computer. Tried very hard not to lose it when my colleague finally asked "Is there a child in the room?"
I genuinely don't think you can be roasted harder than to have a technician prefer to attempt to explain himself to an actual elementary school child rather than that child's teacher.
Kid fixed it straight away? LOL
Digital natives vs grannies. The odds... Everyone would bet on the kid.
Also: kids don't think they "know" everything already.
@@crackwitz lots of kids are insufferable know-it-alls, esp by 4th or 5th grade
I once got a call from a user that she was missing a program that we installed for her the day before. I connect to her PC only for her to tell me I was interrupting someone else.
"Sorry about that, on my end her PC shows up as yours. Did you two switch computers recently?"
"Yeah we switched desks today. That shouldn't affect the programs though, right?"
Wash this around the time of switching from mainframe terminals to corporate networks?
As a retired IT person this is exactly what to expect. I've had enough dealing with stupid.
Most problems are PEBCAK. Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard.
Also known as Error 40 in Danish ("Fejl 40"): Problem is 40 centimeters from the device.
@@lDanielHolm Whatever the language, it's still the same!
The old ID10T error indeed
When I did IT for the army I called it a "wet-ware" issue.
Layer 8 issue 🤓
We had the researchers from this show visit our company and speak to our IT dept, my boss had to tell all the funniest stories we had in IT and define our IT support people to help them with the show. It's great how close they were to some of the things we told them.
Hahah were there any examples of specifics that they used in the show
Was taking prostitutes to the fair one or the stories? 😂
I work in IT. I know a ridiculous amount about computers and troubleshooting compared to average people, but at least a third of all my jobs literally involve me forcing the machine off, turning it on again and it working fine. That's why this scene coined the slogan of the industry. Most people never try turning it off and on again.
+boiledelephant I'd say about 90% of all computer related problems can be fixeed by a simple reboot. Seriously, it's the first question I ask if I get a call. "Have tried restarting it?"
It never ceases to amaze me, even after twenty odd years, that people laugh about us using the old reboot line and yet never actually do it before calling in with a problem.
Really? REALLY? How do they don't reboot? That's the first thig a toddler learns to do about troubleshooting his game PC. It is hilarious if your job depends on computers and you don't have elementary skills of maintaining it.
I agree with you, Stefan, but you'd be surprised at how few children work in an office.
Yep. But considering the millenials, it may be better to have a dinosaur behind the desk that has no clue what a computer is, rather than a punk that has no clue about what work is.
jesus christ this brings back bad memories. so fucking glad i left. ironic enough, i became registered nurse at a mental ward. less insane and more relaxing.
as long as your happy.😀
Hey, that was a real nice comment. Good for you!
Do I know u!?
Picobyte i don't think i know anyone from netherlands. greetings tho.
***** Doesn't matter! I've never met someone in a internet capable canoe so far from my desk before.What do you do for work?
Worked in IT support too long. I have some crazy stories. I had a WoW kid complaining about a graphics card not working and when we took in the card we saw that he had actually mounted a custom fan on it, that wasnt the problem. The problem was that he mounted it with wooden screws that went straight through the circuit board of the graphics card. When i explained that this is not covered by warranty he threatened me that he would wait with his WoW guild outside my job and kick my ass. (WoW = World of Warcraft)
Don't leave us hanging. What happened next?
I like that you had to clarify that WoW is World of Warcraft.
He sounds like a bit of a rogue.
LOL
The hilarity of it..
One user had some trouble with a program so i asked for the name of his computer so that I could connect via remote desktop. Once connected I see a guys profile for a dating website, with tabs for 3-4 other dating websites. I try to go to the control panel so that I can fix his troubles but he and I end up fighting over the control of the mouse pointer. Eventually he wins and closes all his tabs, so I ask "did you ever receive a remote desktop approval message?" Turns out he didn't and that I had typed the wrong computer name and connected to a completely different person.
😂
Windows is just so, so stupid. Why limit 2 users logged on simultaneously? Why does remote desktop even allow the user to control the mouse pointer at the same time as the remote agent?
@@CrizzyEyes Are you aware that all remote control software does this...? You can disable remote input, but you shouldn't be taking over a users' computer either.
Did anyone see that ludicrous display last night?
the problem with arsenal is that they always try and walk it in
What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on that early?
Oh, you seen it too? It's crazy! I was yelling at my TV.
Ham.... west ham
@Tree Fiddy You put a pony on Liverpool? This guy put a pony on Liverpool.
Did she continue talking to you once you fixed her computer? No.
- I felt that one.
Lots of tradesman get that response 😂😂
Same thing also after you shot her, and you moved on to another one
Moss - When I graduated University.
Roy - Me, now, almost ten years later of IT work.
same energy and just with five years
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers. And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else. FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design.
THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@noneone8726 needless foul language aside, i agree with this overall sentiment.
if you are being paid to to provide a service, and the manner in which it is delivered is almost equally important to the technical expertise involved.
I'm actually a network engineer, but when we don't have anything to install or expand, I also do the IT support for the private customers in the small company I work for. We once had a small stand at a trade fair as a company and I had to work on our stand. An elderly woman came to our booth and entered our sweepstakes and asked what she could win. Tried to explain it to her but she didn't understand the concept of IT and tech and after way too long here and there I told her that she could get someone to come and do some housework for her at home for free. Silence for weeks after normality returned and everything: Then I had the week off and when I went to work again, my boss told me that someone had won our lottery and would like someone to mow the lawn and that some idiot told her that we do these kind of services. Anyway, after esplaining to my boss what exactly happened I went to the older woman at home who I lied to for fun and mowed her lawn...
I always felt a bit sorry for IT people dealing with idiots like me, so I always made a point of trying to understand what they were doing, taking an interest and being really grateful for their support. In my last workplace, this resulted in me acquiring a coterie of IT ‘groupies’ - there were four of them - very nerdy lads, bless them - and they started coming up to the building I worked in for lunch and chats on a regular basis. I think people may often have been quite rude to them - ten years later, I’m still FaceBook friends with one of them! 😂 I worked in a large organisation, but I never had to wait for any IT issue to be resolved - pays to have friends in the right places!
My parents once told me that there are two groups any good manager in an organisation respects. The secretariat, and the janitorial staff. I guess you could add the IT department to that list.
Tbf it works with anyone not just it guys, everyone likes when their work is recognised and respected.
It always helps to be nice to the person keeping the computers running.
Even just being nice to others at your workplace can get you so far. If you have multiple tasks to do of the same priority, you bet your ass I'd do the task requested by someone nice than do the task requested by the person who thinks your subhuman.
I haven't even worked IT and that transfers to any other industry.
Same! Many years ago I worked for a newspaper & there were two main IT guys. No one treated them very well, especially the sports editor. Anytime one of them helped me with something, I was always sure to thank them profusely and treat them like humans & shockingly, they always helped me first (or close to it)😉 One time I was being helped and he muttered some choice words about the sports guys😂 Anyway, they would always come by my cubicle for a chat and I'd swing by their office & bring them desserts and things. It worked great. I mean, niceness pays off.☺️
I once heard a story about a woman who was told to move mouse up and click the "View" menu at the top of the screen. After 10 min of her responding trough the phone that it doesn't work, IT came to her desk. It turned out that when she moved the mouse up, she picked it up and held it 10 cm above the desk xD
That's the best one I've read here
Some people are just too stupid to live.
I remember going on a service call and asking the receptionist who's PC was not working if she had tried turning it off and on again.
She looked at me and asked "You can turn it off?"
My favorite would be:
Me: Helpdesk! How can I help!
Customer: "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY COMPUTER?!"
Me: "Windows 10"
the old massive problem being dragged to another tech to be responsible for a coworker's fault
That's an old trick. I use it sometimes, but only as a joke. More than one of my university professors have been burned by that line (I wasn't the one doing the burning, promise), and they will absolutely refuse to touch my keyboard or mouse, because once they do, everything is their problem and they have to fix the whole program written by their student. Oh, sure, they'll tell you what to do, step by painful step, but you bet your boots they ain't touching your keyboard or mouse. "What did you do?!?" Well, first of all, it's what did _you_ do, I have yet to do anything.
One of the best support stories on my behalf.
User calls in with computer problem, remote into their system and began doing the work. All is going well and then suddenly I don’t have connection.
Running pings, checking the sites server, etc - everything is fine on site except for the users machine.
Call the user and ask them what’s up with the computer?
User tells me that he turned it off to save power. Was baffled when I explained to him that the computer needs to be on, in order for me to have a remote connection and troubleshoot the issues.
I was interior communications in the Navy many years ago(many decades ago). There was a piece of equipment called a DRAI table (Dead Reckoning Analyzer/Indicator) It's essentially a big lighted game of Risk at sea. Shows all the expected positions of ships friendly or otherwise within shooting distance. It wasn't working and in the Navy, you can't ask the caller to trouble shoot over the phone because that's YOUR job. So I went up to the bridge and looked at it for about 3 seconds, then turned it on. I really tried to not look smug because that's bad, so I asked if I could be of further assistance and was dismissed quickly.
At the end of my enlistment I went to work for Pacific Telephone (you know it as AT&T). That situation never stopped happening for the next 30 years but at least I could save myself a drive by having the customer trouble shoot it if they would. It saved them time to do it themselves and often saved them money. My favorite comment of all was after taking off the phone jack cover (Yep kids, you used to have to plug your phone into a phone jack for it to work! I know right?! Barbarous!!! inconceivable!!!) People would often say after seeing 4 wire spade clips screwed down, "Is that all that's in there?" Like there's supposed to be flashing lights and technology in there. Next one was when I'd replace a defective phone set they'd ask, "Is it still the same phone number?" "Yes it is. The phone set doesn't determine the phone number." It was a really fun job most days!
Since everyone seems to be sharing IT stories, I'll give one. I received a call from an office worker employed by one of my clients. Their computer was extremely slow. It was not a bad computer ether. I deleted windows temp and user profile temp files (there were a lot) but then I wanted to see how long the computer was turned on. Sometimes the easiest way to do that for a computer that has sleep mode disabled is to check the length of time the internet was connected. I do that and see that the computer was on for more than 700 days. I told her that you have to reboot a computer for it run optimally at least once a week if not twice. She got extremely mad at me for saying that and stated "I was told turning off a computer is bad for it". She say that in a very rude way, so I responded with "No IT professional on earth would tell you that". Mind you, this was 2 years ago and this woman sounded pretty young. I will never forget that conversation.
So turn out she was working for google and her computer was google server she turned them off like you told her to and google stoped working for a while. XD haha imagine of that hapenned XD
With all due respect, normally you don't need to reboot your computer a couple of times a week. Yes, if the operating system or some application has memory leak bugs, it can help. But if the computer works fine, normally there's no reason to reboot it. Also, while a good thing to do once in a while, cleaning temporary files usually doesn't improve performance. That being said, if the computer has been up for 700 days, it means there were no updates installed, including security updates. Which normally is not OK for a computer connected to the internet. Also, she was not entirely wrong. Turning a computer off and on too frequently is not great for the longevity of mechanical drives. Then again, neither is keeping them on for extended intervals when not actually needed. After a number of years of continuous spinning, the hard drive bearings can fail. Also, sometimes the IT department tells you never to turn your computer off, because they want to be able to automatically run maintenance operations on them over night, but it doesn't seem to be the case here.
@@VladimirNicolici TECHNICALLY if it was a linux system it would mean it did have updates; since, rolling release n all that but i am very much assuming that was not the case here
@@VladimirNicolici Windows has new updates requiring restarts like once a month, how did she go 700 days?
@@Gaze73 That is a failure of the IT department, not hers. Automatic updates can be enforced by group policy, and any failures can be monitored centrally.
Whoever wrote for this show definitely worked in IT at some point. Here is a couple of gems that I have gotten over the years:
"There's black smoke coming out of the back of my computer. Is that bad?"
"Can you break into my boss' computer to delete an email I accidently sent him?"
"My computer will not power on." (after some basic troubleshooting she says:) "Boy, its hard to see in here with no power in the building."
I've had each of these countless times. "My computer won't power up" eventually (after quite a while) becomes "oh well there's flooding so we had to close the entrance to patients"
"The internet pedal doesn't work. Can you fix it?
Later on we found out it was the mouse.
Ahhh, the tales that could be told. In a move to streamline the business there was no IT support on location. Protocol was to call the "Help Desk". In Costa Rica. And hope to heaven you could get someone you could understand in the upper Midwest. Didn't take long to begin to refer to that support as the "Helpless Desk".
I'm not really an '"IT" guy, I just know a little more than the average bear. Came into work one morning and all the managers are gathered in the production office. They wave me in and said don't bother trying to work, everything is down. Except email... Sure enough, no office network, no production network, hmmmm. Went up and let myself into the server room (with the "secret" hidden key) just to have a look. All the servers activity lights were winky, blinkin'. Went past the big UPS charger and battery and looked at the rack of switches. Three of the dozen and a half were dark. Well that's not right. what are the odds they fail simultaneously?
Took a peek in back and followed all three power cords to a cheapie $5 power strip which was plugged into a UPS protected outlet. Nah... Can't be. Grabbed my outlet checker. UPS outlet was fine. Power strip was toast. Flipped the switch, tried the reset button. Nary a flicker. Dead.
Funny thing was a few weeks prior we had some mercenary network installers put in a number of wireless access points. Each was protected by a small UPS nearest the switch the AP was using. Upstairs there apparently weren't enough of the main UPS outlets to plug there piggyback into so they used the power strip to make some room for their stuff. Funnier still was their protected UPS had 8 unused outlets that the switches could have used. I plugged the three dark switches in to those and watched everything light back up. Now for the very best part...
I went back down to the managers huddle in the office, tossed the power strip on the desk and announced, "OK everyone! Coffee break is over, back to work!" They looked at me in disbelief. The plant manager said. "But there's a support team flying up from Texas!" to which I replied, "Better call 'em and tell 'em to turn around."
"In a move to streamline the business we got rid of the people who vaguely knew how our magic machines work and outsourced help to somewhere that barely spoke English"
Ah, a true classic. I don't bother helping people with their PCs anymore.
Which above average intelligence bear is running around with an outlet checker? Just use the multimeter you left in the trunk of the car: for these occasions. Right next to my torx/hex set, alan keys, and ratcheting driver. /s (kinda)
@@dfunited1 Sure, I've got all that stuff around too. Really though, all I needed was a quick, reliable go/nogo check on the simplest, most obvious cause. No need to bring the whole squad when recon can clean things up in a sec.
why would you have fixed it instead of milking that free money?
@@XA-lm5oz That's part of what's gone wrong with America today. Everyone want compensation for every little thing. Just do your job plus whatever else comes at you that is within your capability. And don't be chest thumping or looking for a stroke either. If you're really doing the work folks know who it is. Skip the end zone dances and move along like you do it everyday.
That outlook has served me well. Gotten me to places and jobs I most likely wouldn't have had if I'd chased them. Took a bit longer but it all happened and when it did I was practically bullet-proof.
I had too many funny moments working as a tech at my university's computer shop. The totally stupid ones, ok, amusing but mostly covered by those here. I had a uni professor come in and say he wanted to set up WiFi so he can get reception between his two offices. I asked how far is it between his offices? He said one is here in Melbourne, the other is in Sydney. Lol.
Yea, that'll work! Ask the folks at Pine Gap!
For those not familiar with Austrailia, thats thousands of kilometers / miles apart.
I once explained to a customer how to hook up monitor to a PC. He couldn't believe he needed two cables for his monitor since everything he knows works with only one. I was very patient and professional. The call took 40 minutes.
I've had similar calls. I don't work help desk, but I did do help desk duties during school closures. Apparently some teachers, parents, and students didn't realize that they need to charge their device in order for it to function from battery.
It's even "funnier" the other way around, when you're the unlucky sod who seems to be the only person in your 5000+ person company who keeps running into the most unexpected, exotic problems that you end up having to do IT and DevOp's job *for* them.
I've lost count of the number of times people roll their eyes at my inability to do "simple, 5 minute" things, then try to show me how it's done, only for them to quickly realize theres a serious problem and they can't fix it either. It's frustrating, but kind of funny.
Tell me about it, there was some arcane virtualization error I dealt with for over a year where my machines time was off by one regardless of DST which lead to some occasional(read : unpredictable) if not extremely frustrating problems with git.
IT man came over rolling his eyes at me thinking he was going to type "timedatectl set-ntp 1" and go back to jerking off before half of the sysadmin team got on board.
"See, now you just ...that's odd... it should... Ok, scoot over, I'll need to... s'funny, that should work..."
I seem to be that guy, apart from the "me having to do the IT guy's job for him" aspect. I run into some weird problem, I exhaust my limited understanding and ability to figure things out for myself from on-line searching, I sheepishly go to the gurus. They start out with a fairly obvious air of humouring the guy who's far too inept, but their "obvious" solution doesn't work. And then they start digging into things, and dig deeper, and deeper... I readily admit that in some respects, I'm in over my head: I don't have the background in IT that most of my colleagues do. But sometimes that means that I'm trying things the way our customers might, rather than what's "obvious" to my colleagues. And sometimes, truly, stuff just fails for me without my having done anything odd. In some respects it's useful for making our code robust; I've a knack for finding obscure bugs. But it's often frustrating.
I am that guy. Its become a meme to the point they no longer bother me if I'm on a 40 minute call. "Its probably one of those 1 in a million cases he always catches."
I am that guy, except I went into IT because of it, trying to solve my own issues constantly.
Worked out well enough, but I do believe it gives me a predisposition to assuming those rare issues are more common than they are. 95% of the time it is exactly as simple as it looks, which is why they try the fast fixes first. Also saves time, money and resources going easy to hard instead of going for the instinct of the problem.
Once had a call where the person, used to sewing machines, was using the mouse as a foot pedal. The 90's transition into PC's for some people was completely alien but hilarious for us.
It took me about an extra year to update from dos to Windows because I was sure that needing a mouse was just a scam to get us to buy extra peripherals
That is gold! In the early ‘90s I worked at a national cultural institution (in Australia) that shall remain nameless and was part of a group developing what was then a ‘cutting edge’ educational resource on CD-ROM. Such was it’s novelty and significance that we received a visit from the relevant government Minister who was going to ‘test-drive’ the product for a media clip. So there we all are: production team, Minister, Minister’s minions, TV crew, reporters and whatnot - all crammed into our little office. Cameras start rolling. My boss gives a description of the product and invites the Minister to have a try. The Minister walks over to the desk, PICKS THE MOUSE UP OFF THE DESK AND AIMS IT AT THE SCREEN LIKE A TV REMOTE WHILST CLICKING FURIOUSLY, turns to my boss and says “It doesn’t appear to be working”.! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@vjc2270 😂 Classic
One of my favorites was with a husband and a wife. The wife walks in with her laptop, mistakenly bringing her husband in along side her, and says there’s an issue with her laptop.
See, she purchased the laptop from us. We have a warranty on all purchased devices. She insists that it’s an issue with the laptop and that we should fix it under warranty, and she says she’s certain of this since she’s a self-professed “technical person”.
I look down at the laptop she had set on the counter, I open the laptop up, and I notice the power button indicator light is slowly dimming and brightening. I then hold the power button down for 10 seconds, click it once more, and it fires right up.
I concluded that it was hibernate mode. I at least think it was hibernating. Also, the settings suggested that as well.
Anyway, the *reaction* I got out of her husband by doing that was priceless. He goes, “I thought you were technical! HAHAHAHAHA!” And then he kept ripping on her as they left. She took it well, but that was very funny.
Ahhh tech support. Been there. "No madam, there is no way the computer is already booted up, wait, did you turn off the monitor, no you have to turn off the computer. It's going to be the big beige box, it's probably on the floor... no I can't actually see your desk from here."
I can't imagine. Almost all the office computers I have seen were on the desks since the risk of damage to the tower would be too great otherwise.
I once had a person calling in because their internet wasn't working. Upon asking them to check the ethernet cables on the modem, they said, "Hold on. It's hard to get to because I mounted it under the table." Turns out, they put sheetrock screws THROUGH the modem to mount it to the table.
Unless you have actually worked in IT, you wouldn't ever understand. Even if you think you understand, you don't. not even close. I could write a book with the stories... The face that he makes is absolutely perfect. I have made that face before. It's not a face of anger, disbelief, or even annoyance. It's a face of momentary physical pain. It's caused when the stupidity is so thick, and so powerful that it actually bridges the gap between the non-physical thought realm and the physical world, and for a fleeting moment it materializes, takes on mass and form, slaps you across the face, then POOF, disappears as quick as it came. Like a spirit in the night. It's like receiving a short electrical shock. It's actually jarring. I'm not joking. That shock and physical pain only comes after years of working in it. If you have only worked in it for a short time, you wont have truly experienced the "jarring" effect yet. You'll think you have, but trust me, you haven't. Just remember what I've said here some years from now...
+Chris A Had this guy once, using the mouse with his feet, apparently he called it a "pedal" :v it was pretty hilarious
+Rúben Viegas that's fantastic!
Somebody last week put a ticket in because their cellphone was taking pictures upside down. The solution was for her to turn her camera upside down while taking pictures
+Chris A This the funniest comment i've ever read. Because it rings so much truths in it.
+Chris A Dude! I feel you big time! 4 years in IT and counting, and that feeling that you describe is so accurately portrayed I cant even begin...
I once talked myself out of a job in an IT support office, the job was to provide documentation for an office package that predated Microsoft's offering by at least 5 years, written by civil servants.
My job was to be, packaging up 3 inch thick bundles of line-printer output into a "book" and posting it out to the users when they requested it over the equivalent of email, via post office landlines and modems.
I said: Why don't you just send them the file via the landlines and they can print it off?"
Stunned silence.
Didn't get the job.
One of the funniest shows I've ever seen. Just finished re-watching it all the way through for the fifth time lol.
My daughter said I should watch this show, so glad I did. So funny, so many great moments, I just love it!
Heard a story from a coworker who was at a rollout of new software at a hospital that when a nurse was having issues, he asked her to double click on a specific folder. She asked how to do that and he said to move the mouse over to the file and click it twice. She lifted the mouse off the table, held it up to the picture of the folder and clicked...
A similar thing happened to me. I told the guy to move the mouse up and he literally raised it off the desk! To be fair if you're not familiar with these things I imagine it's extremely confusing at first.
during my 3 months in tech support, I had both types of customers, as well as everything in between. The first I was taught during training was to ask the customer "have you tried powering it off and on again?". I genuinly had to start every single converssation with that question, and every now and then the situation depicted in the video did occur. I wish I was kidding.
We manufactured color analysis instruments for various industries. One day I get a call asking to diagnose a failure in their new light-booth. Go through the symptoms until I asked "There's a long black cord at the back of the booth. Is it connected to the wall?" All I heard was a 'click'. Wish I'd known THIS script back then!
I ended up in a job like this, and I actually love it.
I'm sorry are you from the past? XD
Well working for IT in the french Departement of Justice, i can tell you there is A LOT of peoples from the past working there...
Best line ever
A call centre agent rushed me to her workstation once, screaming that she couldn't enter an order because her keyboard wasn't working and the customer was waiting on the line for over 10 mins. I ran to her workstation and she had put her phone on they keyboard's numpad... I explained to her that the phone was pushing down on all the keys and that's why her keyboard wasn't working. She thought about it for a while and then she said that she didn't care for those keys because she rarely ever used them... 🤦🤦♀️🤦♂️
There are so many stories from car mechanics about customers saying their engine keeps shutting off or some of the levers on the steering wheel are not working, just because all the stuff on their key ring gets in the way or pulls on the ignition key.
Probably the funniest show ever to be on TV. How I wish they'd bring another season back!
I had someone who was adamant their password wasn't working, I could see their screen and asked them to type the password in to the application. I couldn't see anything happening for about 15 mins I asked to try again and nothing was happening on screen. I could type the password on their screen but when they did it NOTHING happened. Their keyboard worked fine. I ultimately asked "Where are you typing your password?" to which they replied "On a piece of paper" Outsourcing! It's the future, apparently.
Does the stupidity not know limits??
The person: my goals are beyond your understanding
...
...
...
F O
No way
@Hatwox I wish it was, and this was the short version.
"Did she continue talking to you once you'd fixed her computer?"
"No"
So very accurate.
Poor Roy :(
I better understand now than I did before, that it actually is very important for IT people to start off with asking such things as is it turned on and is it plugged in.
Thank you all of you IT people who have put up with nonsense at your job. It is not always easy for a person to realize that user error is so commonly the problem. Or maybe 98% of the time, It is difficult for them to realize that they messed up or missed something.
I now I'm having Weird Al Yankovic's parody "All About the Pentiums" come to mind🙂 definitely worth a listen if you've never heard it.
I worked 4 years for Comcast customer service. This is a documentary…
I love how he reaches over and grabs his coffee before grabbing the phone.
LOL!!! The anticipation!
My best story was working Tier 1 for a small network management company and getting a call from one particular customer. When the other guys in the office heard who was on the line, most grinned and one chuckled while walking away. The guy was the owner of his particular company and notorious for getting malware and virus' all the time because he would browse porn at work. This was one such call. I remote in, clean up his system and disconnect while he was at lunch. A short time later he calls back saying his bookmarks aren't working and wants me to look at it for him. I remote back in and take a look. I'd say half of his bookmarks were porn sites. I had to open up each website, visible on my screen and fix the bookmarks. Our CIO's office was right behind my desk and he had a window that looked out at my station. Luckily he was a really cool guy so all he did was message me while I'm doing all of this and give me crap the whole time. The kicker of this whole thing was before I disconnected the guy calls me to thank me for taking care of that for him. HE WATCHED THE WHOLE TIME.
'ello, oyyy teee.
I HAVE to use that phrase at work.
"Sorry, are you from the past???"
I helped a fella set up a second monitor remotely last year (initially by guiding him - and the two colleagues he'd asked for help - on how to plug it in). When I'd finished configuring their orientation in Windows settings the guy asked me when he would be receiving his second mouse and keyboard.
No issue there - dude was obviously ripped typing with hands and legs at the same time
I have never laughed so hard at a TV show as I did watching The IT Crowd! I laughed so hard I cried, then I couldn't see the picture through the tears, and I'd have to pause it to wipe my eyes! Back in the day, Fawlty Towers had me rolling with laughter too, but this is even better.
Que?
Exactly 😂😂😂
1:48 after seeing this for third time I just realized, She does "come down there and make him" later on, by beating him to a pulp with her shoe xD
I'm so sad this cuts off right before the line (and illustration of) "and while I was working on it, she rested a cup on my back". :)
She didn't?!
AvRail 5seveN 2 cup bottoms' stain, literally, at his back..
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers.
And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back.
If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else.
FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design.
THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
@@noneone8726 I think you replied to the wrong thread...
@@noneone8726 good lord! bad day, mate?
Whenever we showed up on a PCIT issue, and we had been digging in the system for just 5 minutes the manager would show up and ask what is wrong. Our answer was one that we used by one of our best techs and I used it to end of my 38 year career..."Something broke somewhere"... Proved a successful answer for decades to the Process Managers to leave us alone while we figured out what was really broke.
Been working in IT for a very long time and hearing the audience laugh at the jokes that are a reality to us always made me laugh even harder. I wish they did more jokes about ID10T and PEBCAC errors. One of my favorite memories in my career was when my manager answered a question from a director about “Who’s responsibility it is to manage a certain software suite” . My manager, with a deadpan delivery” said go in the bathroom and look above the sink. Lol! The Richmond character is spot on as well. To all the non-IT people, us nerds do care and work hard for you. While we are fixing your Ethernet connection please don’t rest coffee cups on our back or worse sit down and start doing other work at the desk we are under. That last one happens and it’s really weird.
And that's how you become a desk rabbit
I know ID10T but not PEBCAC... Google is my friend
This entire video was about the user being the error.
PEBKAC: problem exists between keyboard and chair
I had a sign taped to my cubicle for years that just had PEBKAC written on it.
Also PICNIC: Problem In Chair, Not In Computer
ID-10-T problem
I also have this sign taped up in my cube (looking at it right now) but mine says PEBCAK. For some reason I went with Chair before Keyboard...
SBS Shit Behind Screen
Not really a tech support story but similar, back in 2003 or 2004 I was working at an Internet Cafe Teaching basic IT usage one on one from what the icons were and did to Microsoft office etc, anyway for a few months this guy shows up once a week to take the course and he was pretty strange to say the least, for a start he only trusted a Gemini and of course that turned out to be me (regret to have admitted it) so i was thrust forward into this venture with him, he tended to be pretty loud and manic during the hour i would attempt to teach him in (always a big sigh when he walked in) he used to bring in piles of newspaper clippings for me to scan so the he could e-mail then to various authorities and government representatives (no idea why) he barely even bothered with the course, after a while he mentions to me that he has bought a computer and that he could not get it working, so i talked him through the steps he had taken to set his system up monitor, mouse, keyboard, modem, yes to all, but that he could not figure out where to plug it all in to, then it dawned on me, i pointed to the tower unit and asked you do have this don't you? he replied whats that? i could have strangled him...
A girl talked to me once. AFTER I was finished fixing her computer. I ran away.
Sounds like a keeper. You fucked up. teehee
You should have got her number but I would have run away 2 😂😂
When I was in 'university' many years ago (we call it Hoge School, perhaps 'School of Higher Learning' it's a good bit below the level of actual university but anyway)
There was a small room with half a dozen Apple computers so it was a rather popular spot.
There was also a printer so it was an even more popular spot.
However, with so many students printing stuff out, the toner would often run out so it would not work again untill the toner had been refilled.
Whenever I noticed it, I walked upstairs to IT and explained the toner had run out again. In fact, it often was empty when I entered the room I mean, I never ran out of toner because I never printed that much stuff.
So the nice chap from IT would check the printer, find that indeed the toner had run out, which he then refilled.
After which, the printer always went into overdrive and started handling all the earlier print requests so dozens or hundreds of pages would literally fly out.
Because most students probably responded in a different way when they found the printer would not print.
Huh? Okay, press 'print' again.
And again,
And again,
And again,
And again,
And again,
And again,
Etc..
Finally they would reach the conclusion they weren't going to get anything printed that day so they simply packed up their stuff and left.
Without even informing IT to refill the toner in which case they could have happily continued printing and printing and printing!!!
Delete alle opdrachten was geen optie?
@@els4044 Simpelweg niet op 'print' klikken als je ziet dat iet niet print?
En het even melden bij systeembeheer een trap naar boven is ook geen optie?
@@AudieHolland
Ja, maar dat duurt even voordat je dat snapt.
Ik heb hetzelfde met mijn eigen printer gehad die niet wilde printen en toen die het wel deed bleef hij maar blaadjes spugen.
Maar het is toch snel opgelost als je naar printerinstellingen gaat en je alle opdrachten cancelled.
Het verbaasd me dat dat probleem door de it-er niet in 3 minuten opgelost was.
I swear I am Moss everyday of my life. I try so hard to make computers not seem like magic when I talk to people, I give short easy to understand examples, use layman's terms and answer any questions... but all i ever get is, glazed over look and I just know in there head they are screaming ""OH GOD PLEASE DON'T TEACH ME ANYTHING!" so sad, so so sad.
I can understand that, same thing @work for me. "Please don't teach me, I don't want to understand it, I just want to use it".
the problem with them not learning what I'm trying to teach them is, they will call back in for the same exact issue. There are people that call in so often you essentially end up doing their job for them. A lot of IT call center positions are hardly IT related, it is a position with an actual thinking person on the line because half the people calling are not. Like when your error message tells you to call a specific department for support, but you call the general line, or it tells you the EXACT thing you are doing wrong and you keep doing it!
Yup, i may have to physically damage the next person who asks me what the wifi password is - that is available on the homepage of the intranet.
Oh, my god you're _soooo_ smart, you must be a computer genius. I don't understand anything (because I refuse to bother learning for five minutes). - Every single person I talk to about computers.
tell me something I don't know.
I love this scene, but at the same time it disgusts me a bit. Because of how goddamn true it is.
“Have you tried turning it off and on again?” Fixes 90% of all problems
The worst thing is when I call IT, do everything they say, and it doesn't work, so they come, and I watch them do the exact same thing I did, and suddenly it works... Magic.
It just feels like I'm making fun of them.
We get a lot of "my computer isn't working the screen says no signal"...my standard reply is "turn the PC on"..... but one of my favourites is enjoying remoting in and taking control of a users computer when they call to say they can't find a program (as it's not in their recently used programs list so clearly doesn't exist on the PC anymore) and showing them where the All Programs/All Apps button is....You know... the button that appears when you click the start button.... It's usually at this point I wonder how they manage to dress themselves.... or make toast....
... a little bit of toast.... (I had to!)
Please tell me, do they ever learn to use the all apps menu?
***** Probably not on the build...
At least occasionally on that one, they honestly kicked the cable out of the back. Happens a lot with newer HDMI cables.
Heh, back in elementary school, I remembered I used Ctrl + Alt + Delete to try to fix a problem. I was apparently perceived to be a computer genius by both my fellow students and my teacher. Funny times, heh-heh.
"im sorry are you from the past?" one of my favourite lines
just as good as the episode he gets fed up with asking "have you tried turning it on and off again?" then follows it with "have you tried sticking it up your arse?"
When I call IT for help I start with apologizing for my ineptitude and my appreciation for their help.
Then your IT teacher was a douchebag ASSHOLE. Hardware assholes blame the software people. Software assholes blame the hardware people. Manager assholes blame the workers. Workers blame the managers.
And now you do the worst thing of all: BLAMING THE END USER, who puts food on your table, a roof over your head and clothes on your back.
If the user has a problem YOU FUCKED UP in design, implementation, testing, quality control, support, service and everything else.
FORM FOLLOWS FUNCTION, which means you design the machine to suit the user, not ARROGANTLY blame the user for not conforming to your shitty design.
THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT. The Customer Signs Your Paycheck, you condescending arrogant pieces of SHIT.
Clever, be liked and you'll get better service
@@noneone8726 jesus Christ you spammy bastard, at least paste something else!
In middle school, I had a basic computer class, but my friend and I passed on almost entirely extra credit for fixing the computers. The teacher was always amazed that we were able to do it so fast.
The only problem that ever occurred was that the same 7 or 8 kids kept swinging their legs under the desk and kicking the power cable loose.
The only other thing that occurred was one time a student (and the teacher) were convinced that a computer was broken, because it was making noise but wasn't displaying anything. The monitor was off.
I also started my career in a hospital IT department (wow living the dream) and I was like Moss, but I've since learned to teach people instead of confusing them! I had to build my own workstation from the weirdest setup of a scavenged laptop with an extra screen, external floppy and CD, guitar amp for speakers etc. The department was also in a basement and the office manager knew nothing about what the technicians actually repaired. He was called John though not Jen!
Quite a unique show, cast and writers are brilliant, one of the funniest British comedy sitcoms.
Not really. Quite silly actually. Makes it's the UK - US disconnect.
I once asked a user to click the ''Start Menu''.
''What is the start menu?''. . .from a person that uses a PC every day.
+The Staggy Yup, had that, too, in my time in IT. The best thing was the "excuse": "Eh, I don't know anything about computers. Just as you don't know anything about the optical instruments I work with every day, because you don't work with them". Uh, yeah, good thing you don't work with computers, eh?
+The Staggy I remember trying to do that with someone, and then I told them "hit the windows key on your keyboard, its on the bottom left between control and alt" and I got the response, "there's no control key"
+Linkxsc I don't know how these people go about their daily work.
In my case I just tell them to click the ''circle with colours in the bottom left corner'' and hope they don't open Chrome/Firefox.
+The Staggy What about "Could you share your desktop?" - "No, i have a laptop! I told you this!"
+Andre Sampaio My personal favorite is, "My monitor is stuck on a black screen."
"Can you check if it's plugged in?"
"I would, but I can't see anything."
"Huh? Why?"
"The power's out."
And here am I, a daughter of an IT guy. When I'm at work and encounter a problem with my computer I need to check everything a million times just to be on the safe side that when I finally call the helpdesk, there is an actual problem to deal with and not just my stupidity.
I'm an engineer daughter, not IT, but I do my best to try and fix it myself as well. It's got to be pretty bad for me to break down and call IT!
The vast majority of IT support is various degrees of turning things off and on again. Sometimes Windows needs to clear it's memory, sometimes it needs a power cycle, sometimes it's knowing which individual process needs to be forcefully shut down, sometimes it's a reboot to apply a patch, sometimes a user locked a shared system and no one can log in, sometimes it's to refresh policy settings, sometimes you need to clear an error code, sometimes it's to spite the user...
These days IT support is layered, so if you, the customer, have a real problem, you end up at Level 3, about 45 minutes after you called in. By then, you're ready to kill.
I forgot the starting point. You go blue in the face circling through the company's website, trying to dodge stupid FAQs and irrelevant Community Forums until you finally find a phone number. Or not, in some cases.
I have a copy somewhere of Harry Enfield doing the start-up sounds for our Apple computers in a dealership back in the 80’s in Baker St.. He was a great customer and a lot of fun. Plenty of you ‘don’t want to do that’.
I was repairing a PC that belonged to my girlfriend's sister and she was so focused at me like I'm doing a surgery so i told her bring me a napkin and she jumped and brought one, then i said wipe sweat off my forehead and she did it seriously, i was expecting for a laugh but they were dead serious 😂
great thing about the whole show is that this is the same line that closed the final episode - great writing and a great series
One guy once told me if a person was being a jerk then it was a “penalty reboot” they would just make the person do that while they went for coffee or just sat around .... it was sort of like a timeout 😂🤣
i am IT help desk for a big corporation. i have the power to kick people off. restart there computers and even delete all there stuff. there are plenty of times where if a user argues with me on what is the proper troubleshooting or they just dont read or listen to what i say i will just force a restart on there computer. normally takes them 30 mins to log back in and when they call or chat back in i ask them if they are still having the issue and they say no and just want a ticket number. there was one guy that pissed me off so much i said i need to rebuild his citrix profile. but never told him his stuff will not move over to the other profile. they are supposed to keep there files in a network drive and not on the computer desktop anyway. so i went ahead and did the reset and deleted all this stuff. i had a copy of his stuff on a back up drive already but told him he had to submit a ticket and it will take a few days to get restored once he saw all the files where gone.
Jonathan thanks for letting me know that.... I’m a bit of a dinosaur but always knew the person on the other end was really trying to help me.
Keep up the great work ✌🏼
That's actually brilliant
With SSDs nowadays it would a darn quick coffee lol
Had co-worker continually asking others how to download 'torrent' files from the company' s T1 line to his new laptop. One computer-savvy co-worker advised he search for the System 32 file and delete it - thinking NO ONE would do that. Well, he DID. 2nd worker spent the next day restoring worker 1's system!
I have more IT stories than I can count, more often the problems were easy but dealing with the public was the worse. One customer was a bit of a shut in and owned cats, her computer room doubled as the litter box. Another customer answered the door wearing a pistol. Another memorable one was a young women answering the door in a nightgown that was practically see-thru. Needless to say its hard to concentrate surrounded by a bunch of half naked drunk sorority chicks.
I sat within earshot of the IT office and, as a guy who was better with computers than my coworkers, I couldn't help but laugh whenever I heard some of their complaints. I am not IT good but the number of times the problem was solved with "is it plugged in?" was surprising.
I used to travel around the us fixing servers, networks, etc for hospitals. One hospital would have network issues every now and then for years. No one could figure it out. They wrote it off as a weird quirk of that hospital because the problem persisted with different software and hardware. New admin came in, they wanted it fixed, made a huge deal about it so me and a few other people from various departments were sent out to fix it. I was in the attic tracing cables when I see in the corner a blueish hue coming from a ceiling tile. I go over and look down. I'm not kidding you there is a server in this small room completely enclosed.
The hospital admin years back did a remodel for a MRI unit at the hospital (you have to build the room around the unit), and redid the entire radiology, lab wings. In doing so they walled up this old closet that has this old AIX machine and it's been spitting out dhcp it's as it was the domain controller ever since. They never took the old server offline and put in new hardware, old admin left along with the original IT quit so it was forgotten about.
I accidentally got tricked into doing tech support once, I lasted the 15 minutes it took listening to the guy I was supposed to replace take exactly one phone call.
I once had a call from a rather angry client stating XXX branch was down and it was all our fault (as per usual - you get my drift). Turned out the branch had decided to do a refurbishment, and rather than have someone come in to move the NTU, wandered off to their local supplier to pick up a phone extension cord to run to the new location. Humble pie was consumed that day. Not sure if that was my favorite, or the building contractor that yanked off the entire MDF, and sheered off the main feed flush against the wall. Queue calls to the council, permitting, traffic control, digging up footpaths, and a very very large bill...
After 30 years in this line of business, I have to say it is going to be much funnier for the IT guy than average person.