What is the ESFJ dark side?! | CSJ Responds

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  • Опубликовано: 18 окт 2024

Комментарии • 51

  • @deja925
    @deja925 9 месяцев назад +7

    My future mother-in-law is an ESFJ,.. Help!
    When we had a good time at a restaurant, having a great dinner, she asked about our wedding plans, and I told her I don't want a big wedding or party, the mood totally shifted. She gave me the silent treatment basically the rest of the night.
    She even had a conversation with my parents about OUR wedding, not HERS. Luckily my mom told her that I don't want a big wedding party.
    So controlling and boundary crossing in my opinion.
    I respect that she's very traditional and extroverted, but I wish she would respect that I'm very different from her.

  • @00Klingon
    @00Klingon 9 месяцев назад +4

    This matches my own experience with an ESFJ sister in-law (who lived with us for a time) which ended badly when she pulled that rug at a terrible time in my family's situation. What's worse is her Se critic was going off on both me (INTP) and my INFP daughter nearly constantly, but it was like she was grasping at straws for the way I pronounced things or put my socks into the laundry. Like of all the things to hate someone for... and what's worse is we never asked her for anything (we provided roof, meals and transportation), but we never said "no" to her helping out and now I know that's how it all began. She now gets nothing, no information, no communication. She tries to have another sister (ESFP who lives with her now) contact us occasionally to pry info and open wounds. My ENFJ wife has an amazing way to tell someone to get lost and they look forward to it.

  • @jojoqueenofswords932
    @jojoqueenofswords932 9 месяцев назад +6

    I have been married to one for 19 years. Here's my twopence worth. Try to control you with money. Think you owe them sex. Shout you down. Think you should always listen to their opinions, even when they are talking total crap. Enable people who are behaving badly. Inherit money (a bit too often, but also a plus). Micro-manage all cooking. Shadow caretaker, definitely.

  • @Garfeellasagna
    @Garfeellasagna 10 месяцев назад +3

    The dishes thing is so real, I have to do that with my ISFJ mom. I love her but I have to contribute to cooking/cleaning sometimes to take that card away

  • @supremegentleman4276
    @supremegentleman4276 10 месяцев назад +8

    That perspective of “doing the dishes” to punish an ESFJ is so silly to me, lol. As an ISTJ, I’d be happy if someone just did the dishes. Seeing that as a punishment is the goofiest thing 🤣
    If I eat I usually wash the dishes cuz I am raised to have good etiquette, but if someone else does it instead, it’s my birthday then, baby! 🎉

    • @chandanalourembam6993
      @chandanalourembam6993 7 месяцев назад

      Wht do you think about esfj

    • @supremegentleman4276
      @supremegentleman4276 7 месяцев назад

      @@chandanalourembam6993 they’re usually sweet, helpful and feminine. They don’t usually “stand” for any ideal tho, usually going with the majority POV, which I think isn’t good. Real people gotta stand for a real ideal imo.

  • @webisayoub237
    @webisayoub237 10 месяцев назад +6

    First of all chase. If it was not for your channel, i’d still think that I’m an isfj. I just wanted to say that people need to stop hating on esfjs or mean-girl stereotyping us. We already feel inadequate as it is. Aside from that. Keep it up. It’s refreshing to watch a video in which we are more than just doormats

  • @INFamousJudge576
    @INFamousJudge576 10 месяцев назад +5

    2:33 That's something you don't usually hear about INTPs.
    I rarely ask about other people personal lifes but I also rarely refuse to hear about them if someone else is talking about it.
    I guess origin of discovery is the reason. Can't say no to some juicy info, whatever the topic may be.

  • @ameliadeshane9192
    @ameliadeshane9192 10 месяцев назад +4

    Why are you wearing sunglasses? And I wear my sunglasses at night
    So I can, so I can
    Watch you weave, then breathe your story lines
    And I wear my sunglasses at night
    So I can, so I can
    Keep track of the visions in my eyes!! ❤

  • @Brickwilliams
    @Brickwilliams 10 месяцев назад +5

    You should do one of these for all the types so people know what type of people to avoid.

    • @honor9lite1337
      @honor9lite1337 10 месяцев назад +2

      Avoid all type of people.
      -an intp emulating an intj

    • @INFamousJudge576
      @INFamousJudge576 10 месяцев назад +1

      He explained it in season 3

  • @Brickwilliams
    @Brickwilliams 10 месяцев назад +3

    Yeahhh, had a uduf esfj best friend for years, who I recently door slammed, who would spam me with invites if I didn’t wanna play with him or if I muted him. He’d get mad and torture me with invites, very controlling and manipulative little weasel, but also sweet at times.

  • @amyw4216
    @amyw4216 10 месяцев назад +5

    The infp voice at 0:47 😂😂

  • @Researcher9868
    @Researcher9868 10 месяцев назад +4

    If you borrow money from them give it right back when you get paid. Thats what I do. Don't listen to the bs. They will be like no I'm not accepting it and blah blah blah. SEND THE MONEY. LEAVE ON THE COUNTERa(maybe even take a pic of it)!!! AND IF YOU SEND MONEY MAKE SURE YOU PUT WHAT ITS FOR!!!

  • @pthfnder450
    @pthfnder450 10 месяцев назад +2

    I was hoping you would pull out the neuralyzer and tell us, after activating, that we will use this science to improve the world. 😂😂 Nice distinction there with the care taking and giving, sir.❤ Thank you for sharing! Guess the virtue and vice of the ESFJ can then be refined to them being a curse in giving only to receive back and a blessing when they give without any strings attached. Sort of angelic?

  • @chisaki8368
    @chisaki8368 10 месяцев назад +3

    Pro tipp: Make your voice louder in your videoediting program.

  • @maggie1321972
    @maggie1321972 7 месяцев назад +1

    Bloody hell, that describes my best friend/second mother to a T. Fortunately she isn’t too unhealthy.

  • @Brickwilliams
    @Brickwilliams 10 месяцев назад +1

    Woahhh, this explains why my uduf esfj friend who I doorslammed randomly texted me after months of not talking to him that he has a job for me if I wanted it. I declined

  • @Brickwilliams
    @Brickwilliams 10 месяцев назад +2

    I get saying “as a whatever type” can be cringe, but sometimes it’s necessary, I’ve heard you say it.

  • @duckbacon3117
    @duckbacon3117 10 месяцев назад +8

    ESFJs are so annoying lmao 🤣
    Fe Hero covert contracts
    Affiliative
    Se Critic
    Tripple informative
    And the worst one... Te Demon

    • @kiaadams104
      @kiaadams104 10 месяцев назад +1

      Bruh ... the worst.

  • @nethercords
    @nethercords 4 месяца назад

    They suffer from malign elitism

  • @rawlingsmwangemi
    @rawlingsmwangemi 9 месяцев назад +1

    How does an ISTP and ESFJ relationship work?

  • @WilliamHerman-p7d
    @WilliamHerman-p7d 27 дней назад

    VonRueden Expressway

  • @DavidChrisman-p4b
    @DavidChrisman-p4b Месяц назад +1

    Langworth Bypass

  • @Brickwilliams
    @Brickwilliams 10 месяцев назад +7

    It’s nice being ni hero, just being completely detached from people and their bullshit covert contracts. Couldn’t care less if these people never do a thing for me again, there are a lot of people in this world.

    • @chriskozak7356
      @chriskozak7356 10 месяцев назад

      Damn straight man. I kind of love having the ability to not be controlled by xSxJs and their BS norms especially. Nothing can really stop us from doing what we want.

    • @honor9lite1337
      @honor9lite1337 10 месяцев назад +1

      How about INFJ then? 👀

    • @kiaadams104
      @kiaadams104 10 месяцев назад

      ​@@honor9lite1337🤮🤮🤮🤮

    • @rogerbee1234567
      @rogerbee1234567 10 месяцев назад

      free will doesn’t exist so you were just destined to avoid them anyways

    • @nullnun1608
      @nullnun1608 8 месяцев назад

      Preach

  • @willtravel2758
    @willtravel2758 10 месяцев назад +1

    Pollen in December?

  • @ChanelPainter-g4z
    @ChanelPainter-g4z Месяц назад

    Priscilla Roads

  • @briancramer2358
    @briancramer2358 11 дней назад

    634 Nienow Plaza

  • @DongBur-w3v
    @DongBur-w3v Месяц назад

    Gusikowski Crest

  • @AngleaFormichelli-w2z
    @AngleaFormichelli-w2z Месяц назад

    Isaac Square

  • @CharlesHernandez-t9s
    @CharlesHernandez-t9s Месяц назад

    Monahan Pike

  • @FrankRobinson-z6t
    @FrankRobinson-z6t Месяц назад

    Katlyn Heights

  • @agathakeatase9243
    @agathakeatase9243 9 дней назад

    18451 Pollich Course

  • @RebeccaMelvin-p6e
    @RebeccaMelvin-p6e Месяц назад

    31943 Windler River

  • @WallisGordon
    @WallisGordon Месяц назад

    22363 Rodriguez Isle