Does the narcissist treat the new supply better

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  • Опубликовано: 30 июл 2024
  • Narcissist #narcissism #narcsurvivor #empath #mentaldisorder #monipulativerelationship

Комментарии • 713

  • @Missdaisy247
    @Missdaisy247 4 года назад +312

    I'm woke and healed from watching hundreds, if not thousands of hours of videos on narcissism, with online experts, and you're definitely up there with the best! So glad I've found your channel. Brilliant. Thank you for sharing your knowledge.

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +16

      Missdaisy247 thanks for the kind words and thank you for watching

    • @stephumstead2193
      @stephumstead2193 4 года назад +9

      Well said. I agree with u

    • @juliascott1618
      @juliascott1618 4 года назад +8

      Yes I've been watching these videos everyday and its helping me learn exactly what I went through and how to handle these narcissists

    • @pualo9263
      @pualo9263 3 года назад +3

      Same. I ended up going to meditation videos and quigong forms. Its good to detox from narc videos.

    • @morganchastain5113
      @morganchastain5113 3 года назад +1

      Yes great channel !!!

  • @Megzm6
    @Megzm6 4 года назад +455

    Oh yes they have a new supply way before they leave you. Be glad they are gone you lost nothing , you gained freedom from toxicity.

    • @antoinetterocco3701
      @antoinetterocco3701 4 года назад +31

      I’m destroyed. He also turned so many people against me, including his family. They all believe what he’s told them. I’m so hurt by it all.

    • @Princess-gy5kx
      @Princess-gy5kx 4 года назад +37

      Antoinette don’t be hurt ! When this all turns around everyone involved will be mentally scattered like bird feathers when they find out the beast!

    • @antoinetterocco3701
      @antoinetterocco3701 4 года назад +19

      Ms. W it’s so hard. It’s shocking. I still can’t believe this happened. The rebound didn’t last but he still never tried to reach out to me to even say sorry. He had me blocked everywhere as if I did something to him.

    • @Princess-gy5kx
      @Princess-gy5kx 4 года назад +17

      @@antoinetterocco3701 yes it can be shocking! As you allow yourself to heal & press forward it will be more shocking to the Narc perpetrator when you MOVE AHEAD and never look back!! Trust me “ they won’t say sorry” if they do there is an agenda to tear you down behind the fake apology! Pat yourself on the back and thank GOD you came to the light!! Some victims are so blind that they NEVER see or understand the destruction upon them! Process your emotions & thoughts and refill with Positive things . Be mindful and vigilant in future relationships.

    • @Princess-gy5kx
      @Princess-gy5kx 4 года назад +10

      @@antoinetterocco3701 trust me it can be 10 years or 20 years from now the Narc perpetrator will be doing the same thing to someone else. Life is to precious to WASTE on someone like that. I’d rather have hurt Feelings & the ability to move on instead of two happy days with such a spineless monster. The Narc is spineless and weak !! The only power they have is what you give them ! Usually it’s your emotions. Don’t allow that . Rebuke the feelings of sorrow. Breathe in and out. Repeat positive affirmations whenever the pain and hurt comes to mind

  • @sonjamcintosh7813
    @sonjamcintosh7813 3 года назад +79

    To all the victims of narcissists who look for closure. Let the revelation of these videos be the closure you need. Closure don't always come from the person who hurt you, the closure is videos like this to let you know what you were dealing with, how to get away and be personally victorious to not go back or fall for another narcissist. Knowledge is POWER and in this case all the closure you will need.

  • @user-zg7nf5yv1r
    @user-zg7nf5yv1r 4 года назад +80

    People, who are dealing with narcissits right now - i am praying for you. May God give you strength to overcome that addiction and break away from that unhealthy relationship🙏❤

    • @TheHereigoagain
      @TheHereigoagain 3 месяца назад

      I'm just sitting here scrolling and I read your comment just now. I hope you don't mind me messaging you. But I'm still periodically feeling the traces of pain as well as longings for the moments few and in between where I thought that we had made some strides forward in our relationship. Where I would look at her and say to her, I love you and I don't want to see you suffer,no I'm going to get an apartment, or a used car so that you have a way to etc. etc.
      And yes maybe at some level she did want a better life, but for whatever reason, as sincere as she came off she couldn't sustain it. It wasn't in her and it was just sad to watch her gear up for what she was familiar with disappointing everyone around her. Almost an expected confirmation that she was no good and then a backwards walk back to the drugs, and the abusive men.
      Then I'd see her a week later bc shed come and retrieve some of her things and she looked like a fish that you throw back in the water, not truly happy but seemingly back on familiar ground and glad to be back in the familiar even if it was miserable! Peace!

  • @jonie4619
    @jonie4619 2 года назад +22

    This is so true, narcissist as they become older, they get bitter and bitter and destructive and full of toxicity and negativity.

  • @lashondaward2924
    @lashondaward2924 4 года назад +191

    I never want him back and Lord strengthen me so I will Never go back to that EVIL Demonic spirit.

    • @jessicafrost9894
      @jessicafrost9894 2 года назад +1

      What really hurt my spirit was when I realized I befriended the devil. That alone made me sick to my stomach. Given I know the word of God, there’s nothing that could ever make me wanna go back to someone or something like that. Honey I’m cringing at the very thought now.

    • @gladyscuervo2212
      @gladyscuervo2212 2 года назад +2

      You are right. It’s a spiritual battle. That’s why I needed God to overcome evil

  • @Rossi5007
    @Rossi5007 4 года назад +278

    If I still beat myzelf up, it's that I was so freaking blind and trusting. 6 months no contact and feeling better and better!

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +41

      Rositsa Росица that’s incredible, stay strong and don’t go back! Life is so much better on the other side.

    • @Rossi5007
      @Rossi5007 4 года назад +20

      @@harioovadtop2827 Thanks! I was almost forgotten what s life without a narc around ;)

    • @ladasiahjackson4206
      @ladasiahjackson4206 4 года назад +20

      Six months no contact... I cannot be happier!!!!🙌🙌🙌

    • @Moneyoverbullshit850
      @Moneyoverbullshit850 4 года назад +9

      @@harioovadtop2827 Thank you for all this video

    • @gilmourishgilmourish6205
      @gilmourishgilmourish6205 4 года назад +9

      16 months... alive and kicking

  • @divineintentions7866
    @divineintentions7866 4 года назад +88

    The narcissist friends are “the flying monkeys” lol they know the narcs are dangerously hopeless beings but will still side with them...this also includes their parents as well...my life has been so beautiful since I discarded him😁💃🏽

    • @marhineykaye5026
      @marhineykaye5026 4 года назад +5

      This is the best description of a narcissist's friends I've ever encountered.

  • @womanofjudah4746
    @womanofjudah4746 4 года назад +100

    They are Demons on Earth..I call my soon to be exhusbands..El Diablo! I thank The Most High God for my deliverance!

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +3

      Woman of Judah thanks for watching

    • @abiolu7679
      @abiolu7679 4 года назад +4

      Me too, I thank almighty God for my deliverance.

    • @estherdanquah4226
      @estherdanquah4226 4 года назад +1

      # me too the God grace is so massive on my life Amen 🙏.

  • @RoxyMs567
    @RoxyMs567 4 года назад +40

    They treat the new supply the same way. I was once a new supply. Now I am no contact. The narc wanted to hook me on the honeymoon. Hindsight the honeymoon is the addiction I have broken with God help. No contact and the honeymoon is not worth it. I was conned duped and I forgive myself.

    • @bonitasmith6064
      @bonitasmith6064 2 года назад +2

      So true. We need to remember we were the new supply too. Look how good we were to them and it didn't matter. Rest assure especially if your narc is up in age he is set in the evil dark ways so no new supply is going to be happy or be there long.👏👏👏

  • @marnerose2315
    @marnerose2315 4 года назад +117

    Wow. I loved "stop thinking you lost something. You gained something." Amen to that. I also loved if " it was in them he would have been good to me or the person before me." A human hurricane that left a path of destruction. Always had a sob story. I always thought he was having a bad day. My biggest error was thinking he just had a bad day. Wanted to see the good in what turned out to be a snake. He was a monster to me and the person before me and the person before them. It was torture. He disrespected our family time and time again. His cruelty was beyond belief. No amount of love could touch that rotten maggot. I had to discard. God bless you for the powerful truth. So much truth spoken here. The truth will set you free!

    • @tanyarawat9700
      @tanyarawat9700 4 года назад +8

      Ifkr! We empaths are always trying to look at the good and finding excuses FOR THEIR BAD BEHAVIOR! FUCKING CRAZY! NEVER AGAIN THO!

    • @dianezielinski462
      @dianezielinski462 4 года назад +1

      Had 2 discard this user 2!! Great riddance!!

  • @robinsaxophone232
    @robinsaxophone232 4 года назад +109

    So many in these types of relationships are hungering for closure or some explanation. We need to understand that sometimes there is no closure from some people. Your closure is walking away and excepting all your new freedom and possibilities.

    • @LatashaCM
      @LatashaCM 4 года назад +3

      Thank I understand it now. I don't need closure anymore.

    • @iraidushka
      @iraidushka 4 года назад +3

      They don’t give you closure because they want to leave the door open, so they can Hoover you in the future when they done having their fill with a new supply, as they believe they own you for life. Never allow them back in, under any circumstances! Shut that door down tight and for good!

    • @RedBandit_83
      @RedBandit_83 4 года назад +4

      Super true!! That was just for me! I wanted that closure and explanation, but God was saying it doesn’t matter just walk away and stay gone. Move on, I have better waiting on you!! Just trust me!!

    • @antoinetterocco3701
      @antoinetterocco3701 3 года назад +2

      Yes. It happened to me

    • @myvideos4utube
      @myvideos4utube 3 года назад +1

      My soon to be ex husband was texting me repeatedly one day right after I moved out. He apologized for bothering me, said he guess expressing himself was giving him some kind of closure. Me being empathetic told him he wasn't bothering me. Well it's been 3 months since I've seen him and I'm at a point where I don't care to ever see or hear from him again. He's dragging out the divorce while in a full blown relationship with a narc

  • @pope1089
    @pope1089 4 года назад +87

    WTF was that is how you feel after a narc. Broke in ball of debt. Feeling like your soul was leeched off. Vampires

  • @copper067
    @copper067 4 года назад +203

    you can always tell when somebody was with a true Narc and understands the disorder. and this brother has been. great talk keep it coming. you and Quinn from Assc Direct are on point>.

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +19

      Bruce Parkins you’re absolutely right and I’m trying to articulate everything the correct way, thanks for watching

    • @gratefulsoul1661
      @gratefulsoul1661 4 года назад +10

      True Gents.. this is a matter of fact subject. People have died because of not being able to get to this point of their lives and information like this. Thanks for the support. "The Truth Shall Make You Free". Take care Gents, God bless..

  • @lovinglatonya3499
    @lovinglatonya3499 4 года назад +317

    Being nice to a narcissist is like going into the wild at night dripping in blood 🩸...u can’t

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +27

      Loving latonya thank you for watching, and yes you’re absolutely right. They’re the worst

    • @raymondezell7817
      @raymondezell7817 4 года назад +4

      🎯🎯🎯🎯

    • @ogk4lyfmuzik
      @ogk4lyfmuzik 4 года назад +6

      Well said 🔥💓🔥

    • @Princess-gy5kx
      @Princess-gy5kx 4 года назад +6

      Loving latonya. Best statement I’ve heard!!! True, True and very true !

    • @sandrarthornton
      @sandrarthornton 4 года назад +4

      Loving latonya RIGHT ‼️

  • @carriedillmann4455
    @carriedillmann4455 4 года назад +97

    THANK YOU!!! I so wish I had listened to my intuition
    I wasted 18 years but am now free

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +1

      Carrie Dillmann thank you for watching

    • @razasyeda6054
      @razasyeda6054 4 года назад +4

      I wasted one and I’m so glad he discarded me. Initially it felt like he ripped my heart out of my chest but one month into this, I’m like hallelujah

    • @believer2223
      @believer2223 4 года назад +14

      Wasted 20yrs myself. Four children together. Better we got out late, than never!

    • @officialcherry730
      @officialcherry730 3 года назад +4

      Same here.. 18yrs and 4 kids..

    • @myvideos4utube
      @myvideos4utube 3 года назад +4

      @@believer2223 so true...28 yrs 3 sons later, but im out now and waiting for divorce

  • @healthandwellness6312
    @healthandwellness6312 2 года назад +16

    Yep I couldn’t take it no more so I discarded him. 16 months Narc free. I’m at peace and happily single now. Dropping my first book as a breast cancer survivor and got a amazing job and finishing up my Masters Degree. Never would of got this far and beyond if I remained in the relationship. It was so draining and stressful. Those in the beginning 🚩🚩🚩🚩 are important don’t ignore them. Peace Love and Happiness 🙂

  • @samantha5600
    @samantha5600 4 года назад +50

    People warned me from the beginning, my ex would always find a way to blame the person when I confronted him. I stayed over 20 years because of our kids. He got engaged only a few months after our divorce, which was only a couple days before our anniversary. Good luck to her, she thinks she's found her prince charming. 🤢

    • @tipdaughterofthemosthigh9751
      @tipdaughterofthemosthigh9751 4 года назад +7

      Wow the same thing happened to me but he got the girl pregnant while we were married.

    • @samantha5600
      @samantha5600 4 года назад +4

      Tip Yahanah So sorry, thats awful

  • @kadiva3429
    @kadiva3429 3 года назад +33

    The biggest mistake you can make is trying to love someone who doesn’t love them-self . If they don’t love themselves then that can’t possibly love you and You deserve better ~ KaDiva

  • @donnastewart4999
    @donnastewart4999 4 года назад +30

    So true, I was his primary supply until I figured him out. I left twice and foolishly went back. I ran on the third attempt for him to brainwash me again. I blocked him, he is mad as hell, keeps wishing me luck with my new man. He told me I am the one who needs help, not him.
    Sure he is on to his new supply. It hurts but I am free and happy.

  • @tomorrowsworld3674
    @tomorrowsworld3674 3 года назад +38

    You really do start loving yourself more AFTER being in a relationship with a Narc and also you get your freedom back!! Little did he know, he push me right back into the arms of my Creator!! Deuteronomy 31:6 and Romans 8:38-39.

  • @niccivictorious5594
    @niccivictorious5594 4 года назад +51

    I am grateful for making the decision to discard this relationship headed for destruction. God thank you.

  • @shewins3775
    @shewins3775 4 года назад +140

    You have a very soothing voice and it’s so comforting. You are going to have a huge following! I am currently going trough this and it’s so hard. Thank you!

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +34

      She Wins thank you, it’s hard for everyone that goes through it, but you’ll make it and life is so much better without them

    • @omgimover4075
      @omgimover4075 4 года назад +9

      Ikr? lol. I’ve been watching his videos at night which helps me fall asleep. I tend to suffer from insomnia.

    • @iraidushka
      @iraidushka 4 года назад +2

      Yes, he’s got very nice voice timbre ☺️

    • @jeanetteoneillrodz5536
      @jeanetteoneillrodz5536 4 года назад +4

      I grow from every video. After 23 years I have a lot of healing to do.

  • @jensparx892
    @jensparx892 4 года назад +14

    I left my ex narc and returned to my country after 5 months with him. During that time, I saw things in him that I NEVER saw in another human being. Their lack of empathy is animalistic, the lack of morals are uncivilised and the self-sabotaging is just plain sad. Be thankful that you’re not still in that mess and feel sorry for the ones that they’re with -

  • @lisas772
    @lisas772 3 года назад +19

    This one made me cry. (My narc discarded me a week before Christmas, already had side piece moved in 2 days later) Listened to this while taking down all his pictures...to look in his eyes, the eyes I fell in love with, and know he'll never know love makes me pity him.
    I'm coming out of this injured, destroyed and defeated...but at least I know that I will heal and still have the ability to love.
    Thank you. Thank you so much for your brutal reality checks. You've helped me in my darkest moments.

    • @suemorgan2185
      @suemorgan2185 3 года назад +4

      Lisa, you can do hard things! Keep moving! A year ago, I realized I was married to a covert narcissist for 17 years. My divorce was final January 5th and while 2020 was absolute hell, I feel so free and grateful I didn't spend another 17 years with him. You are a beautiful person who will not only survive this, but thrive in a new life. Love yourself unconditionally and you'll never be with another narc again!

  • @doloresortiz3545
    @doloresortiz3545 4 года назад +38

    I did 40 years of a demon didn’t understand what a narcissist everything you mention fits him to a glove I threw him out and at peace and alone now and loving it and will stay alone I give myself peace and happiness and God life is beautiful I kept my promise he pushed me to the edge the lies cheating abuse no more for me God is good.

  • @earlmckinney2849
    @earlmckinney2849 4 года назад +41

    They come to reck havoc

  • @carriedillmann4455
    @carriedillmann4455 4 года назад +51

    I never knew I couldn’t fix him

    • @myvideos4utube
      @myvideos4utube 3 года назад +4

      Wow, those are the exact words my narc said to me, " you can't help me, you can't fix me and you can't protect me" He says he was always considered weird, odd, strange and peculiar as a kid. Well let me tell you, they were ALL right. I had no idea what I was in for on this 28 yr journey. He was so charming and God centered at the beginning, now he's clearly going against what he said God told him and that is that I am his wife. For the last 3 yrs he's been grooming his new supply who was also married at the time. Her ex divorced her once she up and moved from FL to AZ to be with my husband. I am currently waiting for a divorce after living this disrespected life with her here for the last 11 mths. They deserve each other. According to her ex, she's a narc too. Im making a shirt that will say, "Somebody tell Angela I said thank you". I win

  • @dblock8645
    @dblock8645 4 года назад +77

    It seems like the nicer I was the more she hated me

    • @marcsmith5017
      @marcsmith5017 4 года назад +7

      I know man. Same with me

    • @jaimematus7308
      @jaimematus7308 3 года назад +8

      Matthew 7:6
      Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.

    • @1991windsor
      @1991windsor 3 года назад +7

      Same here. Dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

    • @kevinford4701
      @kevinford4701 3 года назад +7

      @@MichelE-mu3ep i did the same. I mirrored her and she became confused..then she hurried and sabotaged it immediately because at this point..she knew...I KNEW.
      After one month...she's engaged to a new supply. He has NO IDEA what he's about to face.

    • @ataerabella
      @ataerabella 3 года назад +4

      @Derrick Franklin you are handsome. Don’t settle. Let em go. Hopefully you’ll find the one that will bring you favor. In JESUS Name.

  • @msprettykawaii950
    @msprettykawaii950 4 года назад +30

    James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you

    • @jessicafrost9894
      @jessicafrost9894 2 года назад +1

      🙌🏾🙌🏾❣️

    • @drayanicole
      @drayanicole 2 года назад

      I just busted in tears after I got discarded tonight. I needed this reminder from God! Thank you Angel Kawaii ❤️❤️

  • @msprettykawaii950
    @msprettykawaii950 4 года назад +14

    This really happened to my husband. I saw his text to a single mom and that woman asked my husband if he was married to me, my husband admitted it and the woman said "I don't like married men because I was fooled by one recently in fact he lied to me that they are separated but in fact, they are still living together", It gives me chills reading that message because she had no idea that he was talking to another narc with the same situation. There is a bonus, I talked to the woman and advised her to avoid those type of guys because she attracts them (she said the father of her child is toxic). Single moms, young vulnerable girls, empathic, low self steem are easy targets

  • @cr3062
    @cr3062 4 года назад +17

    He said...i don't want to destroy your life..apparently they KNOW what they are doing...He's gone now..found new supply!

  • @rennexoxo
    @rennexoxo 4 года назад +41

    "you reap what you sow"

  • @heatherlynn3438
    @heatherlynn3438 4 года назад +37

    I realize now, I was tortured for my Christian beliefs for the whole 20 years I was married. My ex Narc has had 2 new supply sources since me. The 1st one he could live “like they were married” without the commitment, and use her for all the perks that her and her huge family provided. Vacations all over the place, fancy dinners, Suites at the Tigers games, free tickets ect.. She paid 1/2 of the bills and shopped for our daughter. He was nice to her until she got sick with a terrible ear infection. He left her alone to suffer and when it was all over she left him. I spoke to her once and she was shocked to see how fast he replaced her with a “Wild” new supply! She said up until then she thought he was “Classy”.. The major difference between she and I was “Jesus” and a bunch of perks! (I had his 2 beautiful children who he didn’t mind torturing me in front of) . Now this new chick (2 years running) likes to blast everything on Fakebook! She’s either Borderline or a Narc herself. She puts inappropriate stuff out there about their Sex. It’s gross! I watch her go up and down and around and around through the cycle. The only reason I watch is because I have to send my daughter to them and I need to know what I’m dealing with! I warned my daughter about how she takes pictures with them that she doesn’t get caught up with acting like them on camera. No stupid duck lips! Or any other ridiculous poses.. She probably doesn’t need for me to even tell her, but anyone can caught up in a moment that they regret.. They advertise what boozers they are. Somehow by the grace of God they don’t drink when our daughter comes there now. Drunk driving tickets, getting hauled off to jail for smacking her own daughter at their campground ect.. THAT is his lifestyle choice over his own loving and devoted wife and 2 beautiful well behaved, intelligent, sweet children. Narcissists suck!

    • @heatherlynn3438
      @heatherlynn3438 4 года назад +5

      SKYWALL Enterprise Hello! He USED my Faith and my own love for God and him ias a tool of manipulation. I was already broken from a Narcissistic home as the Family Scapegoat. Knowing this, he played “the part” that he loved Jesus and me! It didn’t help that we attended “Word of Faith” Churches! False teachings made EVERYTHING WORSE! He acted one way in public and a myriad of “others” behind closed doors. (Just like my family of origin!) I never knew anything else! Consequently, NOTHING I did helped. I got REALLY SICK with multiple systems breakdown with ailments that they didn’t understand or even find the name of for years of guinea pigging and torture at the Dr.’s. Things like Fibromyalgia, Interstitial Cystitis ect.. I had no idea that people could make you so sick! I got cancer twice of my bladder, 10 cm mass on my ovary.. Just HELL on EARTH! Our baby came a month early from the STRESS of his Abuse! He got his Green Card (Canadian) and his Awesome job with all the perks by using me.. Narcissists are the houses of The Jezebel Spirit. They are the Wolves in Sheep’s Clothing. They come as An Angel of Light. They come “Mirroring” YOU!! Reflecting ALL your same values and qualities for as long as it takes. Once they know that you trust and love them, they USE it ALL against you! The Corona Virus has NOTHING on Narcissistic Abuse on this planet! Narcs ARE the Virus that’s plaguing the Earth!!! It’s an epidemic! My story is told by millions over across the world, played out the same way, yet it’s hard for the same victims to find people “out here” that understands or believes us! These imposters are running the Worlds Governments! They Mirror EVERY Person they know, but save the torture for behind closed doors. The Anti-Christ will Fool the Whole World the SAME WAY! It’s the SAME Spirit. False Christ’s running around wreaking havoc! I hope I answered your question

    • @veronicaglouster1713
      @veronicaglouster1713 4 года назад

      Sounds like u still love that wife title..u waiting for him to come back too

    • @heatherlynn3438
      @heatherlynn3438 4 года назад +2

      veronica glouster No. Absolutely NOT! I would like to see him turn to Christ and start behaving like a Father to HIS 2 Children tho! He acts like a horny teenage boy with his girlfriend on Fakebook. It’s embarrassing but very TELLING of the TRUTH

    • @veronicaglouster1713
      @veronicaglouster1713 4 года назад

      @@heatherlynn3438 they dont change..only on their death bed...they become kids..needy and crying ..and you are the type that will run back to clean his ass..cause you are the wife and baby mama..and praying harder than a priest

    • @Melia_Mer
      @Melia_Mer 4 года назад +1

      @@heatherlynn3438 I hear you, sister! I'm happy you survived the worst! ❤❤❤

  • @wendyapfeldorf2120
    @wendyapfeldorf2120 4 года назад +14

    I've done so much research and thought about this so much. I was discarded by a narcissist for a married female narcissist. I thought he would marry her as soon as we were divorced, but she kept her husband as primary supply and kept my ex-husband as secondary supply. The blueprint for the narcissistic relationship is idealization, devaluation and discard. Devaluation occurs once the narcissist knows they intuitively "have" their target. They love the thrill of the chase in the idealization phase but it is meant to be a sprint. The married female narcissist found a way to remain in the idealization phase with my ex-husband, by never letting him know he intuitively "had" her by never leaving her husband for him. This meant that the chase for him would not be a sprint, but a perpetual marathon. This is probably why I saw him stewing in anger and frustration in his own little world in the last months of our marriage. It occurred to me that this was his karma; to always chase but never catch her, which would be exhausting, because perpetual love-bombing is work for narcissists. There have probably been some mask slips along the way. I am also aware that the passion they feel for the secondary source is derived from the betrayal of the primary source. Since we are divorced and No Contact, he cannot derive the same level of passion for her that he did in the original way. To feel that same level of passion, he would have to lock down a new primary source, which would be work for the lazy narcissist, which is also his karma. I do struggle with regret every day, that I stayed as long as I did, and endured the level of abuse I did. You are right: you really do have to forgive yourself, and I tell myself that every day.

  • @marnerose2315
    @marnerose2315 4 года назад +18

    "Good deals don't last long."🔥🔥🔥

  • @AmandaCaseyy
    @AmandaCaseyy 4 года назад +15

    Your videos made me become unstuck with this thinking! Thank you so much. I got out a year ago and I lost 25 pounds I was hurting for months... I felt like I lost but you remind me I won

  • @razasyeda6054
    @razasyeda6054 4 года назад +38

    Man, I loved this. Bless you. It’s like a brother speaking to me and making me feel some peace

  • @Chris_1011
    @Chris_1011 4 года назад +30

    One of the best videos I’ve listened to on this subject..you sir are helping many people with this..thank you for sharing.

  • @tonyahayes9229
    @tonyahayes9229 4 года назад +13

    Wow!!! Thank you! I was married to one for 21 years. We have 3 children. I didn't know what hit me. It was hard to realize he didn't love me. These people are so cookie cutter. It's been 2 years and now I can really see,.smh. He is still angry because I discarded him. Thank you so much and keep doing these videos. You are touching many lives.

  • @tiayvette2048
    @tiayvette2048 4 года назад +61

    He told me he never met anyone who loved them the way I did ... funny how he never returned the compliment. He did destroy me . He just started his smear campaign 🤦🏽‍♀️pray for me

    • @razasyeda6054
      @razasyeda6054 4 года назад +12

      They really are nuts!!! And that resonates with me so much because now I look back although I got the empty I love yous in the millions, it was always about how nobody can care as much as I did for him, nobody could love him and all that jazz. How I needed to be better at LOVING HIM MORE. Screw em! You can do everything and be discarded. They petty.

    • @freemanx9654
      @freemanx9654 4 года назад +4

      Wow....she told me the same thing about not having someone love her the way I did

    • @tanyarawat9700
      @tanyarawat9700 4 года назад +3

      @@freemanx9654 GOD one of them narcs also started calling me her bestfriend and the only one who really understands her lolll

    • @freemanx9654
      @freemanx9654 4 года назад +1

      @@tanyarawat9700....Yep told me the same thing

    • @antoinetterocco3701
      @antoinetterocco3701 4 года назад +2

      In so sorry. The same here. Humiliated me on fb for all to see. Only thing is I think he got dumped by the rebound.. please stay strong. I’m trying to with everything I got. I breakdown a lot but seeing everyone on here expecting the same thing validates I’m bit crazy. 🙏🏻❤️❤️

  • @Empress4ever
    @Empress4ever 4 года назад +35

    I needed to hear this today. Thank you 🙏🏾

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +2

      Heidi Salome boss4life007 thank you for watching

  • @alexmorgan1095
    @alexmorgan1095 4 года назад +11

    7 months no contact! It’s still a rollercoaster! I needed to see this today!! Brilliant,
    thank you!!

  • @ogsagittarius3147
    @ogsagittarius3147 4 года назад +32

    This is such an amazing video. My husband is a narcissistic. He has found himself a new supplier and she’s just so in love with him. Poor lady🤦🏾‍♀️

  • @joisimone5609
    @joisimone5609 4 года назад +11

    @Hario Ovadtop. they do things to make you feel good at times but the thing is it’s a transaction to them. You can best believe they did something or is up to something that will cost you more in time energy money etc...everything is a transaction for them

  • @carriedillmann4455
    @carriedillmann4455 4 года назад +21

    Wow! I just learned from you!
    I made excuses for him

  • @freemanx9654
    @freemanx9654 4 года назад +12

    So true... intuition was telling me the whole time....right, gave me the story that everyone's done them so wrong; and has had a hard life

  • @jesussaved
    @jesussaved 4 года назад +11

    This should be taught in High School GOD help I was married to one for 4 years because i was never taught about them. Its a hard lesson to learn.

  • @pooh4025
    @pooh4025 4 года назад +6

    New Subscriber
    I pray for protection from the Ex narcissist. He moved on/in with the new women so fast after a long term marriage. But I know it bothers him to see me doing great. I am in school ,growing my business and getting fit .I always told him your not hurting me your only hurting yourself.

  • @more444store6
    @more444store6 4 года назад +13

    It is so good to hear from someone who understands what you have been through.

  • @robdieseldiesel8960
    @robdieseldiesel8960 4 года назад +15

    Man you made me think back to the beginning of my 15 years of torture when I first told her I love her and she responded with a smile like dang already??! I was embarrassed but let it pass me.... man I'd take that day back if I could...

  • @slimskinny
    @slimskinny Год назад +2

    I swear I remember one of last conversations with the narc she said and I quote “I had to ask myself, why am I doing you so wrong, and you’ve done nothing to me.”
    I looked at her and said wow!

  • @freemanx9654
    @freemanx9654 4 года назад +6

    This is why she says..."I don't let people get close to me".....feel like I'm missing something, because she's got everyone else convinced that she just this amazing person

  • @janiedavis477
    @janiedavis477 4 года назад +21

    I felt that" they are coming to destroy"~satan. I woke up one day, literally, it was like GOD was saying drop this zero, I didabruptly, I didnt even know that it was what I needed to do u till later I wanted answers to the whirlwind of craziness that I had been dealing with,smh. Now I know,, let's get the word out so that others can be free as well, ty for this video.

    • @kalima13
      @kalima13 4 года назад

      Janie Davis I had to call god , and pray to open my eyes as I started to feel like I wasn’t the only one , one day he called me , being In another country and you could hear him getting a bj ...for real
      It broke me In pieces but then I started to see the pattern , I started to get info about narcissists and I don’t feel bad no more , I mean it hurts cause it’s like living a Truman show , or waking up in matrix ...it was all a theatre...an act
      So I don’t blame myself , wish I could get out sooner , but I wasn’t talking to God, separated from family and friends, I was in a dark hole , now I pick myself up and try to be nice to myself
      I did what I could , but every time I brought a conversation about god , he would get soooo angry and try to change my opinion , these people are demons In human flesh
      Praise the lord I’m out , thank you god for listening to my prayers
      And god will give you the best partner in the world , god always has a plan
      Sometimes we need to be patient
      But I sacrificed so much for crumbles of love ....
      Should’ve stay in Gods path and do me
      But I always tend to see positive in people
      Bless u xx

  • @Josee2030
    @Josee2030 4 года назад +5

    They are damaged, they can't change and they know who they are. Someone told me on our first date that he is one and he knows how to control it. Wow! No time to waste

  • @Jordanie245
    @Jordanie245 4 года назад +21

    Au contraire Mon frère, your french is on point, your voice is everything, thank you for helping us 💙 I am so glad that I found your channel.

  • @mounmouna2168
    @mounmouna2168 4 года назад +5

    I ve always thought that when someone say i love you, only good happy things will happen, i ve always thought that love is the strongest thing in the earth, i ve never thought that there is people who gonna say i love you and be willing to destroy you.
    Oh My God.

  • @ProGambler101AP
    @ProGambler101AP 4 года назад +9

    Thank you 🙏🏼 I give myself permission to let it go. I’ve gone back way way way too many times. I feel like this time is different and I intend to stay away forever!

    • @cassandrahaas2448
      @cassandrahaas2448 4 года назад +3

      I pray you do ! Keep watching video's. I've been watching these kind of videos for about 2years now. They really help.

  • @PatriciaDeBride
    @PatriciaDeBride 3 года назад +2

    Before i discarded my narc, we were living together for three long long years, he would tell me he see demons chasing him in his dreams..i could not even get through a week without his madness!! When it was time for me to get away he punched me in my face and choked me, and he told me i dont listen to him, he couldnt control me and that pissed him off, but hes in jail and i moved to a new place!! And i thank GOD im delivered!!!

  • @heatherbonanno8465
    @heatherbonanno8465 4 года назад +10

    They are souless and have no redeeming value!!

  • @perryhowells5666
    @perryhowells5666 4 года назад +15

    Thank you for your videos. Your mellow voice, your confident in depth answers to the truth of what these people do and are. It is truly helping and you are probably one of the best coaching videos I have watched on RUclips. Please keep these long videos coming. Thank you

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +3

      Perry Howells thanks for the kind words and for watching

  • @Occupied_South
    @Occupied_South 4 года назад +28

    This man took decades of my life, on and off, only to tell me lately that he was never really that serious about me. I wanted to die. We share a child so I always hoped he would wake up and learn how to be a human being. Starting again. Hoping to cut it for good. Need prayers. Trying to get my head straight. So incredibly confusing.

    • @TamaraGarrettAlpha
      @TamaraGarrettAlpha 4 года назад +1

      They only care about them.

    • @lexuriouslife_24
      @lexuriouslife_24 3 года назад +1

      I’m so sorry! You are strong and you deserve the best! I believe in you! ❤️

    • @TamaraGarrettAlpha
      @TamaraGarrettAlpha 3 года назад +1

      @@lexuriouslife_24 I understand her because I'm in the same boat 😠

    • @angelsummers6555
      @angelsummers6555 3 года назад +1

      He is mean! I hope you have healed already.

    • @jmorgan5870
      @jmorgan5870 2 года назад

      Hope you are doing well 💕

  • @zobella8392
    @zobella8392 4 года назад +3

    My narc discarded me for a female he was entertaining while we were together she is very trashy and disrespectful. She knew about me and our then 5month old baby. I said Karma will definitely come around. I never knew people could be this horrible. My ex definitely tried to break me, stole from me, verbally abused me, cheated with some of the most horrific creatures continuously, Definitely a lesson learned and will never put up with that mess again! Whole family of trashy narcs.

  • @irenebuford8930
    @irenebuford8930 4 года назад +33

    Hario, I think the being kind concept towards the narcissist to me means to walk away from the narcissist in peace... My ex narcissist caused me great pain, he often would say he was sleep, however I found out that he never stopped dealing with multiple sources of supply... What gave me my strength was when I walked away in a Godly manner... I feel sorry for any source of a supply that my ex narcissist gets with... I think God loves me by freeing me from him once and for all... My ex narcissist is a user, the only thing that he ever really wants from any supply is sex or money... You are right it is in their DNA... I have healed enough to know that the only thing I could of done better is to not fall for the hoovering... I admire you and your knowledge that you are putting out here for everyone... My ex narcissist used to tell me that all relationships take their course which means that he was telling me that for him all things end, he also would say that one day I was going to completely stop talking to him, my ex narcissist knew this all along because he knew that he was in my life to be destructive... My ex narcissist was so fake... He screwed over every woman he ever had, actually my ex narcissist was worse to the women that lived with him that were once married to the narcissist... I am so glad that I got out before I ended up living with my ex narcissist... Narcissist are some serious back stabbers.... I pray for their soul...

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +1

      Irene Buford thanks for watching

    • @razasyeda6054
      @razasyeda6054 4 года назад +8

      I wish you strength. The same happened with me and though everyday I felt like going to his house and beat the living shit out of him for what he did to me, I never reacted. Even when him and his new wife plastered their happy marriage photos in my face after two weeks of him discarding me and ending our year old engagement for her. I did not say a word, only prayed to God and thanked him for making me see the devil that was hiding behind the mask. You ARE WAYYY BETTER OFF without such filth in your life. Sending you prayers 💕

    • @sabrinaalston1243
      @sabrinaalston1243 4 года назад

      Irene you are so right.I remember talking g to my Ex Narc one day and he was telling me as a kid his mom was ADAMANT that her children must look good at all times she would prioritize their image over feeding them so if she had to steal clothes from a department store before she gave them a bowl of cereal her MINDSET was at least my kids look good before their nutrition his father came from generational Narc activity Narc activity on both mother father grandparents and maybe even further No way

    • @miza5276
      @miza5276 2 года назад

      Y. Try

  • @jasminearcher7241
    @jasminearcher7241 4 года назад +38

    They are PESTS very annoying and purposely pick arguments

  • @safehaven3949
    @safehaven3949 4 года назад +6

    Facts...my subconscious perked up and prompted me to do the discard

  • @keziahmethu7469
    @keziahmethu7469 6 часов назад

    It’s crazy how I had such a strong intuition when I first met him. I remember looking deep into his eyes (soul) and all I could see was evil spirit, rudeness, selfishness and mean human being. He called me weird but that’s who he became in the relationship. That’s who he always was before me and will always be.
    Always follow your intuitions and ask God for discernment.

  • @AaronTheA
    @AaronTheA 4 года назад +5

    Good catch! Of course THEY want you to be nice! They always try to use the morals they don't have against you! Devil in Disguise!

  • @michaelclarke4736
    @michaelclarke4736 4 года назад +3

    The trick is to beat them to the discard guys - RUN AND LAUGH YOU GOT OUT LISTEN TO THIS MAN HELL YEAH!

  • @pollabolla
    @pollabolla 4 года назад +15

    I want to hear YOUR story!

  • @Julia-ez7vi
    @Julia-ez7vi 3 года назад +1

    U R so right. They tell U things that make U feel Sorry for them. This is the way they get in

  • @KeishaMs
    @KeishaMs 4 года назад +28

    I have watched so so so many videos about narcissism. This was thee best, most informative one I have seen thus far. Mush love to you, Sir. Thank you for taking the time to make this video.♥️

    • @harioovadtop2827
      @harioovadtop2827  4 года назад +5

      Star thanks for the kind words and thanks for watching

  • @glory9585
    @glory9585 4 года назад +3

    Man, you got these “Narcissist” down pack!💯💯💯💯💯💯💯, love your channel. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @foxycleopatra2271
    @foxycleopatra2271 4 года назад +31

    Why do they act so paranoid, like everyone is out to get them? Even their loved ones... smh

    • @jendavis9374
      @jendavis9374 4 года назад +4

      They are paranoid. Mine thought there were cameras in our hotel rooms. People peed in the coffee machine. People spit in their food at restraunt. Doctors were using our baby as a test rat. He was so strange

    • @foxycleopatra2271
      @foxycleopatra2271 4 года назад +1

      Jen Davis wow, just crazy. Mine had our house armed like Fort Knox. Two alarm systems and he slept with a gun under his pillow. So unnecessary.

    • @daze507
      @daze507 4 года назад +2

      It's not an act, they are.

    • @mercedeswalker7819
      @mercedeswalker7819 3 года назад

      They messed up a lot of women !

    • @peachesmonty1506
      @peachesmonty1506 3 года назад

      MY EX NARC WAS SUPER PARANOID! HEARD THINGS, CLAIMED GHOSTS WERE IN HIS HOUSE, COULDN'T SLEEP! I ONLY SLEPT PEACEFULLY WHEN I WAS AT MY OWN HOUSE! PLUS HIS PHONE RANG ALL DAMN DAY & NIGHT!DROVE ME NUTS!!!!!

  • @discernthetimes
    @discernthetimes 4 года назад +2

    The No Contact is difficult to do as many become co-dependant. The world is a lonely place and so the Narc takes advantage of the vulnerable individuals. It takes strength to free yourself from them. Their mind is always buzzing, they are like a hunter seeking their prey. Silence is death to them. They don't know how to be contented in every circumstance. They enjoy confusion, full of drama!

  • @anndra1160
    @anndra1160 Год назад +1

    I'm almost grateful for having gone through my "situationship" with ex narc. It's really opened my eyes about myself. I've always been overly trusting, wanting to see the good in people, and always giving second chances. I'm not naive, I know some people are bad but I really only thought they were the ones you read about or saw on the news. Not the ones you let into your life, your heart, your home. The ones you gave everything to. Now I know better. I've learned to be more discerning! Thank You Jesus!!! 🙏

  • @dn8018
    @dn8018 4 года назад +4

    Thanks for the powerful support may good bless you. I escaped my demonic narcasstic devil husband and I thank God

  • @natarshawhite7016
    @natarshawhite7016 3 года назад +4

    I'm just now realizing that I was with a narcissist and I don't understand why I'm scared to move on. Having a child with a narcissist is the worst thing I've ever done in my life. Thank you for every video because they are really therapeutic to my life and informational

  • @Chrissy-Snow
    @Chrissy-Snow 4 года назад +3

    Watching this video really hit hard.
    Reading the comments really shows how someone always had it worse and mine was pretty bad. So much emotional, physical and mental abuse. The lies, the lies , the lies , the lies.. ugh! I tell him “ you can’t tell the truth for s**t” and “ you really believe you can just lie your bs away” Smh I can’t wait till I’m way over this person and can move on with my life.. till then, I’m alone, healing and dealing with what I allowed to happen to myself.

  • @onelove269
    @onelove269 4 года назад +5

    HARIO...how long does this discard $#!+ LAST? ....it's been 4 friggin years and he's STILL popping up with this BS😠 how come he won't just GO AWAY ALREADY 😠?????

  • @imdifferent7294
    @imdifferent7294 4 года назад +11

    I wish I could have dealt with someone else.....why did I have to be with the worst. He was a Christian, fake......I'm glad I got out.

    • @iraidushka
      @iraidushka 3 года назад +1

      Mine too! Alleged man of God, who got involved with a married woman, committing adultery with her. Pathetic piece of trash!

    • @simonemeghoo4944
      @simonemeghoo4944 3 года назад

      Girl mine was a Christian also. Said he wanted to be a pastor!!! He is a demon from the pits of hell!!!!!! Thank god he’s not leading a congregation!! Run as far away as u can from these people.

  • @demolitor2359
    @demolitor2359 4 года назад +18

    What are fantastic tone of voice you have sir...... New sub here.... ;-)

  • @deannab4175
    @deannab4175 4 года назад +5

    You came at the right time.

  • @gabriela_sd260
    @gabriela_sd260 4 года назад +4

    "Much more vulgar"! So true! So true!

  • @precioussamson2264
    @precioussamson2264 4 года назад +7

    This type of people are pretenders they try to hid who they are some time and tell a lot of painful stories they are totally devil.

  • @hassnapapyb1365
    @hassnapapyb1365 4 года назад +13

    Why he kept asking me after he broke up with me if I found someone if I got a boyfriend??? Is what I don’t understand he was with the new supply already

    • @iraidushka
      @iraidushka 3 года назад +5

      Exactly what mine ex narc was asking me. Who I was sleeping with. Whom I was dating, even though he already was with a new sad lady lol. They are burning with jealousy, cuz they think they own you for life and dare you to go out with someone on a date. But them screwing a new supply is no big deal and should not be questioned. They exhibit truly bizarre behavior.

    • @bharatisharma5034
      @bharatisharma5034 3 года назад +3

      Irisha n Hassna same here
      He asked same question from me

    • @AmandaWilke-Realtor
      @AmandaWilke-Realtor 3 года назад +2

      Same here and I think it’s because they want you to come out to people with your new partner before them so they can smear you more. They don’t want to show their new supply off so soon b/c people will be surprised and see that the new girl was in the pic BEFORE you guys broke up. They always want to look like “the good guy” 🙄 Think in the most devious way, and you will find your answers...sadly.

  • @kt11540
    @kt11540 4 года назад +18

    I really appreciate this video, he gives such great advice that really hits home. His advice, has really helped me see things clearly.

  • @rhondacooper7957
    @rhondacooper7957 4 года назад +6

    You are so right about this video, and thank you for sharing. I appreciate you taking the time to speak on narcissists disorder.

  • @foxycleopatra2271
    @foxycleopatra2271 4 года назад +4

    Omg, you are so right!!! I’ve experienced everything you mentioned in this video. New subscriber here. I’m an empath.

  • @jessicacayabyab4767
    @jessicacayabyab4767 3 года назад +3

    He said.. go to someone who will appreciate you. After me finding out all the cheating. Best thing he said when he was discarding me. Byeeeeee!

  • @jeanette-and-ernie-atthe-a3271
    @jeanette-and-ernie-atthe-a3271 2 года назад +2

    Again: Why would anyone Worry about ''The New Supply?'' - Who Cares?!!

  • @megabby222
    @megabby222 4 года назад +1

    Keep keeping it real. Thank you so much for the help and understanding you have given me.

  • @jenshaw3309
    @jenshaw3309 3 года назад +2

    So well spoken. Your analogies make the basic facts so easy to digest. Keep doing what you're doing. You analysis of these demons is spot on!!

  • @evamcinnis7992
    @evamcinnis7992 4 года назад +3

    Thier evil seed! Jazzabel spirit!! There's always an esson in a lesson!! It hurts bad! But when I think all I went through with him I have a testimony and everyone else does. To help one other. Thank you brother we love all you counselers thats helping us get through this,, GOD bless you all.love you all of you are good Angel's here on earthof the light! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🙏🙏😘💞💖💕💓👣👸👸If he comes back he will be Jailed!!!

  • @user-zg7nf5yv1r
    @user-zg7nf5yv1r 4 года назад +1

    Thank you so much! I was whatching many channels about this topic of Narcissits. Your channel is the BEST, it helped me to deal with the wife narcissists who destroyed me. But i found peace finally because of love❤

  • @bigcyhutch
    @bigcyhutch 4 года назад +2

    I am just commenting all over your RUclips channel ha ha! You are not being negative at all you’re just telling it like it is and you’re advising and warning people about these creatures called narcissists. And thank you once again! I just found your channel last night and I am so appreciating every video I’m hearing!

  • @maryanngray4519
    @maryanngray4519 2 месяца назад +2

    I'm not going back or looking back , lm looking forward, straight ahead.

  • @reneepettitt9560
    @reneepettitt9560 4 года назад +3

    I just want to tell you that I have listened to hundreds and hundreds is these videos regarding narcissism over the last year. You have by far helped me more than anyone else. Thank you so much. I am truly beginning to see just how lucky I was to get out of that nightmare.!!

  • @AndreaMartinez-lu9ld
    @AndreaMartinez-lu9ld 3 года назад +3

    🙏🏼 thank you! I needed to hear all this. I’m so broken I hope to feel love again someday.

  • @donalddaugherty7206
    @donalddaugherty7206 3 года назад

    Omg Hario, I've watched at least 30 of your videos, but this was by far the hardest hitting one! I'm gonna have to rewatch it a couple more times! Thank you for your help