TIMESTAMPS #10. “You're okay.” 0:50 #9. “I'm so fat!” 1:50 #8. “Hurry up!” 2:47 #7. “Don't be sad.” 3:50 #6. “Let me do it.” 4:50 #5. “You're so incredible!” 5:52 #4. “Good job!” 7:10 #3. “You need to set a good example for your little brother/sister” 8:04 #2. “Go kiss Grandma.” 9:02 #1. “I'm so proud of you!” 9:55
My parents never say : I'm proud of of you! They force me to play the guitar. I wanted to try it out, and I wanted to stop. Now they force me to do it..
I feel same way as u , my mom always compared me with other kids , everytime I got bad result exam , she will say that "Look ,ur friend got 5A straight why can't u be clever like her? " it hurt so much .now I'm still mad my mom for what she done . She even don't support me for what I dream to be but I let continue my dream. Don't let ur parent conquer ur life so much , chase ur dream for what u want to be ,as teen u have right talk to them. It not like we mean or selfish to them ,but it for ourself. too.
What I hear from my mom: “Brat!” “Stop making excuses.” “Ugh! You’re so sensitive!” “Stop Complaining!” “Ugh! I don’t care!” “What do you want?!” What my older brother hears: “I love you” “Do you need help?” “You’re so calm and nice” “You’re the golden child”
SlothSimmer What i have to do around the house “Alex, take the trash out” “Alex, go get [insert item here]” “Alex, do the dishes” “Alex, clean the bathroom” “Alex, clean your room” I do this while my 8 year old brother is watching tv. My mom will then tell my brother to do one chore, and he’ll start whining and saying stuff like “I do everything in this house.” Or “i have to do all the work!”
I don't get why parents think yelling at a child frequently motivates them, it makes them scared and less motivated to do stuff :( (note: I am not a parent lol and I've watched a lot of news, ALOT of news so that's why I commented this, I am NOT a parent at all)
That's the same with my older sister, she barges into my room whenever she wants not even caring that I could be getting dressed. I only recently convinced my mom to yell at me to get up at 7:30 every morning
i just want my mom to treat me like a person and not a machine that just spits out good grades and completed homework assignments. unfortunately she thinks treating me like a person (more specifically, someone older than 3) would be "being my best friend instead of my parent" or that treating me with the smallest bit of respect would be disrespectful to her. :/
Yup, got the exact same when I was in school. That's probably why I don't like actual school. I'm 26 and refuse to go back to college because it's a waste of time and money when I can just research on my own without worry of a letter effecting my outcome. It's a friggin letter or number that literally NOBODY looks at. They just ask for your diploma or GED.
1.'YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FAILURE I'VE SEEN IN MY LIFE.' 2.'YOU'RE NOT WORTH IT.' 3.'YOU SHOULDN'T ASK FOR THINGS YOUR SIBLINGS ASK FOR. THEY ARE FAR BETTER THAN YOU.' These are some other phrases .
Here's how to raise a kid: Throw away the parenting books and videos and just take your mind back to when you were a teen. Not every kid can be explained away with books. So if you're a parent, just talk to your kids like they're a person.
For the last question of the video: "you're so beautiful/handsome!" If you keep telling this to kids or teens they will grow tired of it and some even grow as spoiled brats. This was always told to me and I started to think that no one actually likes my personality but my looks. And it made me stress, because my personality is the complete opposite of my look. So I dint tell anyone. I don't regret it
I actually am a prepubescent child and this happened to me! I think I am a spoiled brat but at least I notice I guess. I grew tired of being called handsome like I don’t even think I am but I just say thank you.
Bleu Orange Wow, I'm seeing all these comments here mentioning how saying "Good for you" is bad, but I'd say what you mentioned is the best alternative to say :)
#1 I'm proud of you, is the only one I don't agree with. I spent my entire childhood/teenage years desperately trying to win the approval of my parents. No matter how hard I worked, I never heard 'great job' or 'I'm proud of you'. Truthfully, hearing the phrase 'good for you' would have felt like a slap in the face; like they were distancing themselves from me and my accomplishments.
You probably had narcisistic parents, have a look at PsychtoGo's youtube, they have useful videos on parenting styles and how to cope with negative personality types in your life.
Too late for me buddy. I bottled it all up till I become numb. I'm told to be strong and don't cry or else I'll be called a crybaby by my dad who acts like a fuck1ng manchild whenever I cry lol
Teenage years is when my fuse is short, my sarcasm is on high, and I finally start to snap, After all, You can only push someone so far and put them under so much pressure before they snap
Definitely don't tell us "you're okay." That will make us feel insignificant and like we should only be happy. Honestly, being just happy isn't the only emotion we should be allowed to feel. If we're introverts, it will make us feel even more introverted as we keep to ourselves.
Jessi Face I wish I could be as confident as you.. I have Singaporean parents and they’re overbearing as heck. Send help, justice and equality to all them pressured Asian kids~ (By the way, you’re right!)
"If they are mean to you at school just ignore them." This is the classic parental response to when their child (A.KA. ME) tells them that they have been being bullied at school.
Sometimes it works, but most the time it really doesn’t. The worst thing that can happen is when like two people listen, have seen it, yet nobody believes them or will do anything.
If I called myself something negative my mom would yell and ground me (partially) for a day or two. When I'm sad, "STOP LAYING AROUND AND COME HELP ME!" Which makes me feel worse, and then I'm sluggish, and then she yells at me for being so slow, even though she knows I'm sad. And then she blames video games for making me slow. While she still knows it's because I'm sad, and threatens to ground me if I don't speed up.
They do that to add a false sense of choice despite your lack of one in the matter. Which I can say out of current experiences, isn’t the best for a teen with low self esteem.
Aziz Quadri , they might have a point though, kids nowadays start watching Disney channel-( lots of teenager targeted TV shows) at an early age -7-8. And they start copying the teenage behaviour. Maybe following the advice of this video earlier in the kids life will help better.
I showed my mom a drawing of mine today and she said ''ok" Then my brother showed her a drawing and she was like "i love it hunny" and hugged him ...really...
Sometimes my mom just nods. well I wasn't angry or anything. I don't really care. And for my little bro she says " I love it" probably she saying that because he's like 5 and she probably thinks it's not really good but she doesn't want to upset him.
Ikr, i drew something digitalized earlier, same thing happened to me, but whenever my brother draws she even post it and i'm always "Its not like the whole world needs to know, im barely noticed by her friends"
"Why are you depressed? We never did anything to cause the depression." "You're the one putting pressure on yourself. We never put any pressure on you." "Why do you need a therapist? There's nothing wrong with you." "Your parents, we felt empty all the time. Don't be upset, it's okay." I wish someone helped me back when I was in middle/high school. I'm okay now, I'm much more satisfied with myself now, but I just wish someone would've stepped up and got me the proper help I deserved. My parents didn't even listen to me, even when my doctor told them *in front of their faces* that I might've suffered from depression.
Karen Yang Hey, it's me: a kid living out what you went through. "No, she's fine. She's never told me she was depressed." "Why can't you just be happy?!" "I never did anything to you!" "No. Not my child. No daughter of mine can be depressed or anxious. Impossible."
Sounds like my sister. Every time she sees that i'm sad, she gets angry and says things like "stop being depressed ! You have a pretty life !" or "i'm doing my best to help you, you won't get over it with that behavior !".
100% relatable I couldn't tell my parents that they're the ones who needs to be careful with their words/phrases. They just forcefully pressure me in things I don't want to do, it stresses me out. I love my parents but sometimes they can get a bit strict. However I'm sure we can improve our attitudes💕
Yeah... Sometimes I feel like the "my daughter is a teen" mindset my mom has made for me gets in the way a lot when things aren't even that bad. She just takes things the wrong way sometimes... I dunno. Maybe in the future I'll remember writing this and think,"I was just making excuses for picking a fight"... Oh well
I said I would feed and water my friend’s pet rats and she laughed, telling me that they’re delicate and shouldn’t be in direct sunlight - still don’t know whether that was a plant joke or a legitimate order.
How perfect it would be if your teen is named after a flower. "Don't forget to give your Lily some sunlight." "Don't forget to water your Rose." "Your Acacia is growing!" Just perfect.
Like I say to everyone who says that: Everyone is abnormal and weird in their own way. If everyone is abnormal then that means you can't call someone weird. Weird is the normal. Accept people the way that they are😊.
I have a few: "Why can't you do as well as so and so?" "You need to focus on school work; life isn't meant to be fun." "You'll never get a job if you wear this/never do this." Just things I've heard
Daeza Kid why cant you be as pretty. Or you would be pretty if... Or your not pretty looking like this.. You should do this to be pretty. These are things ive heard 😭😭😭😭😭
When my mom told me she was proud of me I actually always felt proud of myself from early childhood on up to even this day! To me it seemed obvious that she basically wanted to say: "Hey, you did that well, you should be proud of yourself!" My mother also told me that a lot when I was insecure about myself and the things I did. She also didn't only recognise actual results, but even if I failed she would still acknowledge how hard I tried. She never even put me down for bad grades, but either felt with me or told me "I know you could have done better." That was hard to hear at the time but honestly: She was right. Although I didn't like hearing it, it was the simple truth. All in all, all these things helped me build my self-esteem and become the person I am today. I guess it really comes down to communication and the actual message the parents want to send to their children using those statements.
I shared the video with my parents and my uncle who is gonna have kid soon so he could use that in the future. If I spelled anything incorrectly it's cuz I'm only 10 yo
If I say what I feel to my mom, today She will repeat it in my ear over and over again And still tell me that I need to tell her what I really feel My mom : tell me exactly what you feel!! It's unhealthy hiding it from me Me : you'll never understand My heart : it's hurt
Ik how U feel- ;w; Me: *Tries to talk with my mom cause she told if I don't talk for my feelings she gonna stop my contact with my friend or something like that* My mom: *Finds excuse for everything and says to me that my cousin is physical sick and I shouldn't complain that much and stop act like crybaby* Me in mah mind: LOL U help so much... Thank U, U repeat I am just nothing and I only do something wrong but my cousin is the perfect person, my friendis one user and that I am just a crybaby-... 🥲
"Your lucky, back when I was in (insert thing here) i didnt have, (insert object here)" This phrase (at least for me) makes me feel like I need to have struggle and for it to be like when my parent was in this thing.
#BFFAEKawaiiSquad! Yeah, I completely agree. So I actually ended up struggling more than Mom because of my undiagnosed ADD and later my depression, panic disorder, and all that anxiety. I struggled more than she did in the end, and she's told me that... In the end, if you make up with your family, things that were broken can be mended, and things that were ruined can be replaced and made new. But you can't get new parents, not without it hurting a lot, anyway.
That’s one thing I don’t get why buy something for your kids if you’re just going to make a burden out of it by constantly reminding them how much it cost.
It's almost like they dont realize as we move foward in technology, certain hardships should go away, and the quality of life improves and more choices are given in life.
#2 kinda brought bad memories. My Aunt died 2 years ago. I miss her so much. I cry myself to sleep thinking of her. I always ask her “Can you see me?” This was a very sad memory in my life. I didn’t want my aunt to die so soon, But everyone dies at some point. My Aunt died at 60 years old. I just hope she can see me from Heaven. I went to her funeral and I cried so much. She will always be my heart. I bet she can see me from Heaven. I was 10 years old when my aunt passed away. Now I am Almost 13. My Aunt is watching me from Heaven. This was a very sad memory for me. My Aunt died in November. November 2018 was kinda a bad day for me. I miss my Aunt. She will always be there for me. I miss my Aunt so much. I will never forget her... I am crying right now Like this comment if you feel sorry for me :(
Wow that’s super young to die my tutor teacher is 56 or something and she’s already a grandma ugh it must feel so bad to lose a loved one My mommy lost her daddy
The thing is that my parents say I’m worthless, and when I got back home (because I lived in our province) my mom said “you know what? Ever since you got here, I have always been stressed!” Which is kinda sad actually xD
The title only says "teen" so the video gets more views. Most of the viewership on RUclips is aged around 8~19, so it makes sense for Bright Side to use the word "teen" as opposed to "child." It doesn't help that parents tell their younger children that they're mature for their, either, since they just categorize themselves with older groups of people.
What i hear from my grandma "your so disappointed" "why u always say sorry to me i dont forgive you! "i don't love you anymore" "we don't want you here anymore!" "go away i only love your sister not u" What i hear to my aunt "don't be sad" "you got a bf im so proud of u" "i well help you" "i always loves you^^"
But the only thing I'm mad at and this is coming from a kid so don't even say you're one of those lousy parents just because there are negative things in school does not mean or give you an excuse not to do your work
@@ihavenoideawhatimdoing4 tch... It’s not about that This person has been yelled at and hated on for *years* It seems their only source of comfort family-wise is their aunt.
I’m a teen and my mum says none of these, she loves my sister more that me, it’s really damaged me and every time I try talk to her, it gets into an argument, I always run upstairs and cry because she doesn’t understand me and she tells me not to talk back even though I was just explaining how I felt, she said she’ll never love me if I don’t love my sister but I love her so much but the fact she said that tears me even more...
I can understand you , all these things are happening to me too so I just cry my feelings off at night when everyone is sleeping or lock the door of my room and cry alone ... 😔😔😞but now my parents are restricting me from closing the door of my room too... If I cry in front of them they will just say "There you go again !!!" or "Stop being a crybaby you are too sensitive!!!" which makes me want to cry even moree😢😢
Tamanna Sajwan Same here! My dad is less strict since its my mum who is saying hurtful things. If I cry, it’s only at night when everyone is asleep beause I dont even have my own room so I never get any privacy, I really wish that when we cry they just comfort us instead. I hope that when I’m older life with be easier. And I can’t believe they dont let you close your door, what do they think you’ll do? Congratulations, you have just made a child who lies to you, learns how to be sneaky and probably mentally unstable. You’re not alone and I’m sure it’ll get better soon 😕💔
Lisa Clown get a recorder and record him saying it. It works every time cause recorders don’t lie. Your bff will have no choice except to believe you 😊
That's why I've had a hard time fighting for my insecurities and gaining some confidence because my dad is always saying bad things about me and compared me to others as if I'm not his daughter.
Once I told my mom that I was depressed , she told me " Stop complaining ! There's nothing to feel this way. You're just feeling this way because you have been doing nothing and just sitting at a corner and crying for no reason. Stop making excuses and stop crying for no reason at all ". And then I was like " WHATTTT ?! ". Tbh , that made me feel more depressed than usual. I wish if she would have just hugged me , instead. Cause at that time I was just so lost and helpless and yeah I guess, that's what I needed the most. And now , I don't tell about this to anyone out there cause i feel like no one really listens to you , you know. It's about 2 years , I'm still suffering this alone. :)
My mum just always told me that I shouldn't be sad. When I am sad I want to talk to someone but I'd be blubbering my words and near everytime she has the nerve to say "I'm not going to talk to you if your gonna cry" and walks away leaving me to cry more, then she has the nerve again to come in once I've calmed and then try to be nice. Most times I am so mad at her I just scream at her to leave me alone
@@aquaroo1194 I wish if they would just sit beside us and just try to understand us. That would be so great , isn't it ?! Well , I hope you're doing okay now. :) ❤
Uddipana Das ~ my parents say “you can tell us anything”. i feel like i can’t though. i know more than im supposed to. (inappropriate stuff for a nine year old) im pansexual and like stuff im not supposed to. (music) they want to know the real me but, i always say to myself “they won’t accept it. im too young. i need to wait till im older.”. they also always wanna know what I’m doing. i get really paranoid. im cyber bullied by random people online. i hide my emotions. im really scared of a lot of things. very paranoid. i want to cry a lot. i kinda have social anxiety. (i don’t really like to talk to people) im also depressed. ive never confessed anything. (besides being depressed) my parents give me ‘inspirational speeches’. be yourself, you’re beautiful, blah blah blah. i don’t feel the prettiness. i can’t be myself. i don’t know what to do. my life is often yelling because my mom is bipolar and my sister also is. i always get afraid of everything. i feel like something bad is always gonna happen. im starting school soon. (i was homeschooled) i feel like im gonna be bullied. my mom says “be yourself, don’t take their word to heart”. im very sensitive. i can’t really change that.
@@minyiecake ouch. That hurts. I do understand how that feels. I don't know what to say.... I wish if I could just hug you right now. I'm so sorry to hear that. You're going through so much ! You're a fighter. You're so brave ! I know you're tired of hearing such things but i just wanna let you know that - things does get better. Trust me , time heals everything or maybe it doesn't , maybe with time we just get used to it and learn how to deal with it. But eventually , it does get better. And guess what ? Sometimes it's okay to be not okay. It's okay to feel this way. Cyber bully ??! Gosh. Do something about it honey ! Don't suffer alone. You don't deserve this. And don't hide your emotions. Never ever do that. Ask someone to help you , honey. You're so brave. Just hang in there. Things will get better. Maybe not today , not tomorrow , not next week , not next month , not even next year , but one day for sure and that day you are going to say proudly to yourself " Yes I did it ! ". You deserve the best. You deserve all the happiness in this world. Take care. :) ❤
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IDK HOW TO HELP ANY OF U AND IM CRYING CUZ I CAN'T HELP CUZ IDK HOW AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA BUT MAYBE THIS WILL HELP?????????? ruclips.net/video/AJADIiCRAWc/видео.html
My dad says that whenever I feel upset about something he feels is "not worth being upset over", and, if anything, it makes the feeling about twice as bad and redirects most of it to him. That may just be me, or it could be common to feel this way; I don't know.
my moms when: my brother is not doing his chores, skipping the laundry, and playing video games all day: 👩🦯👩🦯👩🦯 my mom when i miss one sock in the laundry: 🤭😡❌🗣🗣🗣
#2 brought up bad memories. I was at the hospital with my entire family visiting my Grandma, my aunt says "go kiss grandma, you'll never know when she will be gone." and what do you know, an hour later, my Grandma was gone. I never knew that it would be the last time I'd see her. And to this day, 2 years later I still feel bad for not kissing my grandma.
"Adults are always right" "You have to listen to grown ups" "If someone is older than you, you have to respect them" "You OWE me respect, without me you wouldn't be here".
WE ARE THE NEXT GENERATION IF YOU ADULTS KEEP MENTALLY ABUSING US THE FUTURE OF THE HUMAN KIND WILL BE LIKE THE PURGE PARENTS HAVE THE FUTURE OF THE HUMAN RACE IN THE PALM OF THEIR HANDS AND THEY JUST ABUSE IT THE NEXT GENERATION IS GONNA BE THE END OF THE HUMAN RACE HAVE YOU NOTICED THAT WHEN A TEEN DOES SOMETHING GOOD IT GOES ON THE NEWS AND GOES VIRAL THATS BECAUSE GOOD TEENS ARE RARE BECAUSE OF PARENTS MENTALLY ABUSING THEM
Parent: (is doing work and needs some help around house) Teen: (offers help) Parent: Oh no thank you, I'm fine! Teen: Are you sure? Parent: yeah! Teen: Ok! (goes off to text friends, do homework or leisure activities) -A FEW MINUTES LATER- Parent: (finds teen) I ASKED YOU TO HELP, I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING IN THIS HOUSE!!! Teen: Uhhh >:( anyone else find this situation relatable, this happens to me a lot. (WHERE DID ALL THE LIKES COME FROM WOW!?)
Early teen here. "Don't ask questions!" This one hurts. It makes us feel like our questions don't matter/are too insignificant. "I'm just looking out for you." NO, this DOESN'T make us feel good or protected. We want to feel independent. When parents say this to us, it makes us feel like little children that need to be watched over. "Because I said so." This ties into "Don't ask questions". We're at the age where we always want to know what's going on. Unless it's particularly sensitive, please tell us. "Stop complaining!" Now, we all complain sometimes. This is perfectly valid when we are specifically trying to complain and aggravate parents. When we're simply voicing our concern, and not rudely? We don't like our concerns brushed off as complaints.
I totally agree. Being a pre teen and listening to these will totally hurt. Its just that we are not able to talk to our parents freely about all of this, or even show this vdo to them because they will be like, "Ah! Nothing like that. We don't tell anything to you guys in order to demotivate you, or hurt you." Or, they just laugh it off, which is the most annoying thing ever
Wrong if you know there's something going on you should ask because it can have long term effects of distrust. Being open and honest with your parents is showing that you can trust someone. Don't shut your parents out because there parants they ask questions because they love you. And care
@@jazminnew3757 It’s not easy to be honest when you already lose trust with your parents. It’s easy to lose trust on someone but it’s not that easy gain trust when you already made them lose your trust.
Also we learn alot on internet than school , they just dont understand us and why? Google is better than teachers because google knows almost everything.
okay but a teen gets waken up by his/her parents in the morning? my parents just sleep, i wake up thanks to my alarm. once i get up, i do everything myself, including breakfast
As an 18 year old, I disagree with steering parents away from encouraging their child? I would LOVE to hear my parents say they’re proud of me. And telling me good job, or saying I’m incredible or whatever wouldn’t add to my stress level. It would actually decrease it because i would get a little time off of constantly worrying about being good enough. That’s reassurance that I AM good enough. That while I should always strive for improvement, im doing well. I don’t see the harm in that.
Sydney Tonkin the problem comes when that's all you hear. If you hear it once or twice it's okay. But if with all your effort you only get: "I'm proud of you". It is frustrating
He never specified to not give praise instead of giving praise for any of these phrases, he just gave alternate ways of saying them that helps put a different meaning into the praise they're giving.
Same, I would LOVE to hear some sort of encouragement, but no I only get pushed away for the most part. If I ever have children I will praise them for when they do the right thing, or do well on something. (Like a test.)
my parents always want me to not really react when they hurt my feelings, but when i don't they just push it until i do react and it hurts even more, then later they just barge into my room and say sorry but doesn't help and it's just really annoying.
I remember when I use to cry when my mom brushed my hair, it always hurt and she would always say something that implied I'm overreacting, then when my little sister started to mimic my cries of pain tho not feeling any (she told me she wasn't feeling pain) my mom started blaming me for the way my sister acted while she was brushing her hair. She didn't even cry while others brushed her hair amd because I would try not to cry while others brushed my hair and some didn't brush as hard. My mom just started saying "look what you did" or "if you didn't cry all the time, she wouldn't" while my sister was crying...Plus my mom and step-dad would scold me for my hair being a little too knotted, witch only made me not want to brush my hair My mom actually says the bonus alot, one time she told everyone it was down, then a few hours later told me and only me that's it's on again but told me not to tell my siblings
At 8 : don't yell at them to hurry up. Let them sleep and miss the bus. They'll be happy to miss school. This way you'll become their best friend. Just kidding.
Hey, my parents telling me that my 5 younger siblings looked up to me and mimicked everything I did made me a much better person. I was constantly thinking that whatever path I followed, they would try too. So the choices affected not just me, but all of them. Nothing wrong with telling your older children to look at who is watching them.
I too have five younger siblings and I was told that but its different for me... I began to distance myself from them because I felt that I wouldn't be the best older sister for them. Guess it's different for everyone
I have a lot of younger siblings. half and foster siblings, and i'm older than all of them. when my foster mom told me "be a good example for the younger kids" i looked at her and told her "why don't u teach them right from wrong so that way when i make a mistake, they won't follow? with ur logic u should ban tv since the people in the shows u watch r terrible role models". from that day forward, i lived how i chose, and i fell many times, but she was there to help pick me up and the children then learned that it's okay to make mistakes as long as u learn from them
Topaz 96, it truly depends on the personality of the kid, that way worked for you and that is fine. My parents knew how I operated, so their methods worked specifically for me. To each their own and I am so glad she was there to catch you when you fell and help you back up, she sounds like a really special person. :)
kp1officer well yes everyone is different, and my way of dealing with things won't always work for someone else. doesn't mean it hurts to try though lol. and yes, she is an amazing person. she constantly takes in kids who need help, and she raises them as her own. she is the best mother i ever had
I get annoyed with that statement, for the simple reason that I DON'T WANT THE PEST TO COPY ME! I WANT TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL, AND THE BEST AT ONE SINGLE THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What if we said " I'm so proud of what you've done" or is it just the "I'm". What if I'm so proud of you is something they here all the time even if they made a mistake but corrected that mistake? Could the phrase be good if they just here it all the time no matter what?
Parents: "If your best friend jumped off of a bridge would you do it too?" Me: "No." *in my mind* "Of course I would they are my bestie, if they jump then I do too, I'm not a disloyal person"
"Oh, grow up already!" is one that made me feel inferior and mentally underdeveloped. Also, telling your teenage son "You act too silly for a man with hair on his chest/armpits/other part of his body" can really hurt his self esteem and make it feel like he is trapped in the wrong body and needs to make changes to it in order to not feel defected or broken. Those hurtful phrases, as well-intended as they might be, are very damaging and need to be avoided.
Them: Ask questions like "what made you choose that colour in particular?" Me: Um, no don't ask questions like that because I already question myself enough thank you
Honestly my parents passed all of this they sometimes say I am proud of u but I understand what they mean I don’t over think it I love my parents they care for me and I will repay them and I am sooo thankful :) have a nice day/night everyone !!!
I think parents who never say “I’m so proud of you,” and “Good job,” end up with even more crumpled kids. But it’s good to know that the attention can be focused better on them by making these phrases better.
I see nothing wrong in stating, "I'm (or we're) so proud of you!" , since it truly states how I (we) feel towards my/our child/children. The statement, "Good for you!" although positive, has an air of detachment to it. I've had people (in general, not parents) say this phrase to me and no matter who said it, it always came off as sounding like the person who said it was separating themselves from me by not including how they too felt happy for and connected with me.
Kat Kristar : Yeah, we probably think in a similar way. I also don't see anything wrong in saying: "I'm so proud of you!" I wrote a comment which mentioned my point of view for number #4 and #1. I'll copy the comment for you here: It's an interesting video and honestly, I agree with all of the thoughts except number #4 and #1. Reasons why I strongly disagree with number #4 and #1 are described in two following paragraphs. I'll start with number #4. Okay, I understand it's better to focus on the way of achieving the result, rather than just saying "Good job!" But I don't see why you couldn't do both things - saying "Good job!" and then focusing on the way of achieving it. I strongly disagree with that notion you shouldn't praise your child for a good job by showing your reaction. And praising him/her is definitely not in the contradiction with focusing on the way of achieving the result. And now number #1. There is an even more upsetting point of view mentioned in this part of the video. Replacing the sentence "I am so proud of you" by saying "Good for you!" simply doesn't seem warm enough to me. It's almost like saying - "You probably feel good after achieving your goal. I don't care too much but I guess you're happy." I know it's not directly said in this way but it almost looks like saying a stuff like that to me. I would honestly prefer saying something warmer instead - for example: "That's really great you've achieved your goal! You must be so happy! :)"
I’m an only child it’s awesome I never get to share anything everything is peaceful I feel bad for you I’m 9 years old currently and I’m glad I asked my mom I don’t want a sister or brother I hope ur a teen cuz soon you can move out and have fun on your own
@@rajkaur9348 I always wanted a sibling, but now that I have one, I don't want her. Being the only one child is the best!I'm 11 right now so I'm actually a tween.
Yup. I was told by my parents and counselors that my mood swings and depression were probably just part of being a teen. I found out later when I was 22 that those were early symptoms of Bipolar Disorder after my first manic epsode.
cellogirl11RW having mental illness is rare, having mood swings as a teen is very very common. I'm sorry for what happened to you tho. My parents also told me my OCD, Derealization and anxiety were part of growing up.. I hope they're right
11:12 -"You should lose weight." -"Did you hear our neighbour's kid do? You should take example from them." -"I am concerned about you" -"It's for your own good" -"Stop living in the dreamland this thing won't make you to earn money" -"You better be clean your room or i am throwing away everything you own" (Some of them told to me and some of them to my friends)
"You're never gonna make it in life." "I can't wait for you to move out and go work at McDonald's for the rest of your life." "You need to get a wife and kids." This is what I hear everyday from my stepmother.
@@greatwavefan397 I will go with first cuz you make kids HAPPY and you get PAID While being a parent your kids can be annoying or irritating I’m talking about McDonald’s and I just realized it’s second one
TIMESTAMPS
#10. “You're okay.” 0:50
#9. “I'm so fat!” 1:50
#8. “Hurry up!” 2:47
#7. “Don't be sad.” 3:50
#6. “Let me do it.” 4:50
#5. “You're so incredible!” 5:52
#4. “Good job!” 7:10
#3. “You need to set a good example for your little brother/sister” 8:04
#2. “Go kiss Grandma.” 9:02
#1. “I'm so proud of you!” 9:55
BRIGHT SIDE of on
Thanks xD
Thanx
Hermione Granger ikr
Lel
my parents always compares me to other kids. It hurts so much as their only daughter
Marielaaalala I have a brother but that’s it but never talk to him. I kind of know how you feel
This is a brutal devastating mistake. Everyone is unique, and you. Feel free to defend yourself from such verbal attacks, sweetie
My parents never say : I'm proud of of you! They force me to play the guitar. I wanted to try it out, and I wanted to stop. Now they force me to do it..
I feel same way as u , my mom always compared me with other kids , everytime I got bad result exam , she will say that "Look ,ur friend got 5A straight why can't u be clever like her? " it hurt so much .now I'm still mad my mom for what she done . She even don't support me for what I dream to be but I let continue my dream. Don't let ur parent conquer ur life so much , chase ur dream for what u want to be ,as teen u have right talk to them. It not like we mean or selfish to them ,but it for ourself. too.
He- llo-o can’t cha correct spelling!!!!!!!!
What I hear from my mom:
“Brat!”
“Stop making excuses.”
“Ugh! You’re so sensitive!”
“Stop Complaining!”
“Ugh! I don’t care!”
“What do you want?!”
What my older brother hears:
“I love you”
“Do you need help?”
“You’re so calm and nice”
“You’re the golden child”
You have a narcissistic parent. Your the scapegoat. get out as soon as you can. Good luck!
SlothSimmer same! My younger brother gets whatever he wants and I get only complaints from not being good enough.
SlothSimmer
What i have to do around the house
“Alex, take the trash out”
“Alex, go get [insert item here]”
“Alex, do the dishes”
“Alex, clean the bathroom”
“Alex, clean your room”
I do this while my 8 year old brother is watching tv.
My mom will then tell my brother to do one chore, and he’ll start whining and saying stuff like “I do everything in this house.” Or “i have to do all the work!”
SlothSimmer women typically like boys more and will sweep women under the rug.
Omg same
I don't get why parents think yelling at a child frequently motivates them, it makes them scared and less motivated to do stuff :( (note: I am not a parent lol and I've watched a lot of news, ALOT of news so that's why I commented this, I am NOT a parent at all)
But it also keeps them away from being bad and naughty so Yelling is everytime not bad
I wish that everyone who comments on this (and everyone with bad parents in general) are able to have better lives in the near future. :(
Well its not bad if parents yell as long as they dont always yell. I myself am a teen and...yeah.
@@noname16-m2z true.
Sad truth :
"I'm so proud of you" really? I am dieing to hear this. Whatever I do they never appreciate(other than something related to studies).
Help why is this so relatable exepet the studies part
It's the opposite for me as someone saying that to me angers me greatly especially when their proud of something I don't want them to be.
I dont bc i feel like they're lying.
I'm so proud of you 🤗
I hear a lot and even I like you to hear it.
"Hey dad pls knock before you open my door"
Dad: "I don't have to knock it's my house"
That's the same with my older sister, she barges into my room whenever she wants not even caring that I could be getting dressed. I only recently convinced my mom to yell at me to get up at 7:30 every morning
lol
gd year so TRUE
Hhhhhhhhh thats so true
I do the same with my sister when she she says me to get out of her room I say it is technical dad's as he owns the house.
"Because I said so" does absolutely nothing to teach your kids anything.
I listen to them anyway
I WILL NOT BE DICTATED
So true
"Because I said so" can make kids obey blindly to dictators and bosses in the future.
Dad says that plus "whose in charge "
“Words can cut deeper than a knife” i felt that💔
correct
Me too😭
Let's cut the watermelon with insulting words.
💔
I know that's right
“Things not to say to teens”
*pictures of little kids*
Hey, they can be small teens. Even malnourished if you wanna get partially technical. Unless they're dwarfs.
Ok
Exactly my thoughts
Exactly
Ya like I’m only 10 and look older.
But the picture are like 4 year olds
i just want my mom to treat me like a person and not a machine that just spits out good grades and completed homework assignments. unfortunately she thinks treating me like a person (more specifically, someone older than 3) would be "being my best friend instead of my parent" or that treating me with the smallest bit of respect would be disrespectful to her. :/
RainbowChocolate THIS
Yup, got the exact same when I was in school. That's probably why I don't like actual school. I'm 26 and refuse to go back to college because it's a waste of time and money when I can just research on my own without worry of a letter effecting my outcome. It's a friggin letter or number that literally NOBODY looks at. They just ask for your diploma or GED.
I am lucky... She understands what I am good at
Bruh. My mom told me that mom is the only bestest friend.
Ugh🐺
don't compare them to ANYONE... relatives/friends/ANYONE, don't compare
Jemma J Yeah. It should have been in it.
Exactly. That’s another one of my problems
Exactly. When you compare family or friends it creates envy and hatred.
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS
Jemma J oh my mom does it all the time. No worries though. In through one ear and out the other.
Word that never should be said to teens “ your a disappointment”
My mum is always comparing me with other kids
That should never be said to anyone.
1.'YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FAILURE I'VE SEEN IN MY LIFE.'
2.'YOU'RE NOT WORTH IT.'
3.'YOU SHOULDN'T ASK FOR THINGS YOUR SIBLINGS ASK FOR. THEY ARE FAR BETTER THAN YOU.'
These are some other phrases .
Well happened to me a lot of times
When i dropped out of college they said it
"Words can cut deeper than knife"
Me:*cuts watermelon by insulting words*
😂😂😂
😂
LOL
😂
😂😂😂😎😎😎LOL
Here's how to raise a kid:
Throw away the parenting books and videos and just take your mind back to when you were a teen. Not every kid can be explained away with books.
So if you're a parent, just talk to your kids like they're a person.
Zooer true. Good advice
+Nevaeh H.
You'd be surprised how many parents view their children as property.
Loxalare Are you one of us?
Aidan Frevert
A little
Zooer exactly!
Don't insult in front of others and don't compare with their friends, relatives and others.
Ashley Boyer hmm...u r saying right they do for good future thnk u so much ....
Hey no one can stop them for doing this
For the last question of the video:
"you're so beautiful/handsome!"
If you keep telling this to kids or teens they will grow tired of it and some even grow as spoiled brats. This was always told to me and I started to think that no one actually likes my personality but my looks. And it made me stress, because my personality is the complete opposite of my look. So I dint tell anyone. I don't regret it
I actually am a prepubescent child and this happened to me! I think I am a spoiled brat but at least I notice I guess. I grew tired of being called handsome like I don’t even think I am but I just say thank you.
@@kn1752 yeah same...
Hi
My parents only tell me that when I get dressed in new clothes or things like that
Yep
*10 things you should never say to a teen*
Me: being a teen and watching this.
Me also
I'm a tween but can relate
Same
Im a tween im watching this so i know what to ignore when im a teen
Same here
I wouldn’t want my parents saying “good for you” instead of “I’m proud of you” that just sounds rude to me.
Same.
Seren & Lorraine same haha but Bright Side has a good point though. Maybe it should be "That's great!" instead of "Good for you!" lol.
Or just maybe: "THIS IS AWESOME HONEY!! YOU KILLED IT!!!"
Bleu Orange Wow, I'm seeing all these comments here mentioning how saying "Good for you" is bad, but I'd say what you mentioned is the best alternative to say :)
Seren & Lorraine good for you
#1 I'm proud of you, is the only one I don't agree with. I spent my entire childhood/teenage years desperately trying to win the approval of my parents. No matter how hard I worked, I never heard 'great job' or 'I'm proud of you'. Truthfully, hearing the phrase 'good for you' would have felt like a slap in the face; like they were distancing themselves from me and my accomplishments.
You probably had narcisistic parents, have a look at PsychtoGo's youtube, they have useful videos on parenting styles and how to cope with negative personality types in your life.
Dann right I agree 100 percent the only problem is when it said and not believed then its just as bad as not saying it at all
Tiffany J Clark, same. That's why I stopped showing my art to my mom. XD My dad sometimes says good job.
Just what I was thinking.
﴾*'-Hero Of Time Rachel-'*﴿ same with me.
“Don’t be sad!”
Seriously don’t tell me that
If you don’t let it out, then it’ll stay inside and burst out at any time
Too late for me buddy. I bottled it all up till I become numb. I'm told to be strong and don't cry or else I'll be called a crybaby by my dad who acts like a fuck1ng manchild whenever I cry lol
@@gato8008 my dad is similar, he’s a man child who doesn’t have any common sense
Teenage years is when my fuse is short, my sarcasm is on high, and I finally start to snap,
After all,
You can only push someone so far and put them under so much pressure before they snap
Definitely don't tell us "you're okay." That will make us feel insignificant and like we should only be happy. Honestly, being just happy isn't the only emotion we should be allowed to feel. If we're introverts, it will make us feel even more introverted as we keep to ourselves.
YES
Jessi Face Also, "Don't be (insert negative emotion)" It just devalues our emotions!
So true so true
It's especially worse when you get physically hurt and they say the same thing, am I right?
Jessi Face I wish I could be as confident as you.. I have Singaporean parents and they’re overbearing as heck. Send help, justice and equality to all them pressured Asian kids~ (By the way, you’re right!)
"If they are mean to you at school just ignore them." This is the classic parental response to when their child (A.KA. ME) tells them that they have been being bullied at school.
Also "You're fine. There's nothing to be afraid of." when actually there are a lot of things to fear.
Well.you should.ignore them.or.just insult them.and then walk.away
I can ignore anything until they touch me.
Brand 7 then it be WHOS TOUCHING DA CHILD!?!?!? *arguing about why you dont touch da child* shoutout sr. pelo
Sometimes it works, but most the time it really doesn’t. The worst thing that can happen is when like two people listen, have seen it, yet nobody believes them or will do anything.
If I called myself something negative my mom would yell and ground me (partially) for a day or two. When I'm sad, "STOP LAYING AROUND AND COME HELP ME!" Which makes me feel worse, and then I'm sluggish, and then she yells at me for being so slow, even though she knows I'm sad. And then she blames video games for making me slow. While she still knows it's because I'm sad, and threatens to ground me if I don't speed up.
I feel you man thats why you just have to get rid of emotions all together and physical pain
Roblox boy lol
You need to see a therapist or talk to your mom about this or if you're not comfortable talk to your dad
you might wanna invest in *Stacks o' Uno Reverse Cards.*
Aww I'm really sorry 😞
Nobody: my mom when I do something wrong and I’m crying: stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about >:(
Ah... They are just f-
^^ both my parents say that to me a lot because of that i don't really cry in public
My dad does it
@@nusrat5665 we have similar thoughts
I hate it when a parent asks a yes or no question and you say no but you parent still make you do it
Angel Estrada Yeah right...
Same. Also, saying “thanks” after making you do something
Angel Estrada YES OMG
They do that to add a false sense of choice despite your lack of one in the matter. Which I can say out of current experiences, isn’t the best for a teen with low self esteem.
Discord Angel223 Andim a teen with VERY low self-esteem.... Im basically depressef and i put myself down all the time
I find it kinda strange as to how bright side talks about teens, yet they insert pictures of prepubescent kids!
You're right. I didn't notice until you pointed it out! xD
Aziz Quadri its not strainge!!
Aziz Quadri , they might have a point though, kids nowadays start watching Disney channel-( lots of teenager targeted TV shows) at an early age -7-8. And they start copying the teenage behaviour. Maybe following the advice of this video earlier in the kids life will help better.
I knew that.
naly202
You're probably right, but I found it kinda strange at first sight.
Bright side: Nobody is perfect.
Me: B-but EVERYONE IS PREFECT!
People called Everyone or Nobody : ;) Thx Dude
*prefect*
Perfect people exists. I've met one. Its rare
I want you to say everyome is perfect
@@andrej-ng9kb No. Rarely some people are
Yeah,my mom always say “take care of your yougers also me and my younger Sister”.
It is not your place to take care of your younger siblings, it is your mother's place.
@@jennyclark6183 true
Me toooo
I showed my mom a drawing of mine today and she said ''ok"
Then my brother showed her a drawing and she was like "i love it hunny" and hugged him
...really...
Same. I'm the oldest with three younger brothers.
Sometimes my mom just nods. well I wasn't angry or anything. I don't really care. And for my little bro she says " I love it" probably she saying that because he's like 5 and she probably thinks it's not really good but she doesn't want to upset him.
Sup Boi this always happens with me
mushroom Soup you must be Doing something wrong Dear
Ikr, i drew something digitalized earlier, same thing happened to me, but whenever my brother draws she even post it and i'm always "Its not like the whole world needs to know, im barely noticed by her friends"
"Why are you depressed? We never did anything to cause the depression."
"You're the one putting pressure on yourself. We never put any pressure on you."
"Why do you need a therapist? There's nothing wrong with you."
"Your parents, we felt empty all the time. Don't be upset, it's okay."
I wish someone helped me back when I was in middle/high school. I'm okay now, I'm much more satisfied with myself now, but I just wish someone would've stepped up and got me the proper help I deserved. My parents didn't even listen to me, even when my doctor told them *in front of their faces* that I might've suffered from depression.
my parents don't know that I might have depression and/or anxiety
they never listen
Same I get blamed for everything
Karen Yang
Hey, it's me: a kid living out what you went through.
"No, she's fine. She's never told me she was depressed."
"Why can't you just be happy?!"
"I never did anything to you!"
"No. Not my child. No daughter of mine can be depressed or anxious. Impossible."
Sounds like my sister.
Every time she sees that i'm sad, she gets angry and says things like "stop being depressed ! You have a pretty life !" or "i'm doing my best to help you, you won't get over it with that behavior !".
this why I just don’t talk to my parents they usually don’t even notice me 😻
100% relatable
I couldn't tell my parents that they're the ones who needs to be careful with their words/phrases.
They just forcefully pressure me in things I don't want to do, it stresses me out. I love my parents but sometimes they can get a bit strict.
However I'm sure we can improve our attitudes💕
I also dont like when parents say "Your a kid, kids dont get stressed out/ your a kid you cant get wore out by running all day" like bruh-
@@user-yi4ii9rl9l *deep inhale* I... can't even
@@2323ketly e x a c t l y
If parents aren't so careful with their words or actions, maybe both, they need therapy
@@gato8008
My parents: wth is therapy?
*wants to show to mum but is too shy*
Ikr..
yeep..
Meeeee
Same. So instead I sit beside my Mother and purposely put up the music
Yeah... Sometimes I feel like the "my daughter is a teen" mindset my mom has made for me gets in the way a lot when things aren't even that bad. She just takes things the wrong way sometimes... I dunno. Maybe in the future I'll remember writing this and think,"I was just making excuses for picking a fight"... Oh well
When they said: “when YOUR TEEN” I felt the need to laugh. Don’t forget to feed and water your teen too.
lol
I said I would feed and water my friend’s pet rats and she laughed, telling me that they’re delicate and shouldn’t be in direct sunlight - still don’t know whether that was a plant joke or a legitimate order.
How perfect it would be if your teen is named after a flower.
"Don't forget to give your Lily some sunlight."
"Don't forget to water your Rose."
"Your Acacia is growing!"
Just perfect.
Don't forget to walk your teen at least once a day.
IKR!
My mom: "HURRY UP YOU ARE LATE FOR SCHOOL"
Me: "but school starts in 1 hour"
ya a bit same
Exact copy but for everything
"Your friends are normal!"
WhY cAnT you bE lIkE: name
*You don't truly know them, we are just alike*
Like I say to everyone who says that: Everyone is abnormal and weird in their own way. If everyone is abnormal then that means you can't call someone weird. Weird is the normal. Accept people the way that they are😊.
No one likes me in my school 😫
@@AgentRidge where are u from
I have a few:
"Why can't you do as well as so and so?"
"You need to focus on school work; life isn't meant to be fun."
"You'll never get a job if you wear this/never do this."
Just things I've heard
Daeza Kid 😱 that's most depressing and pressuring things that I have heard from any parent
Daeza Kid your life is what you make out of it, it can be wonderful and fun or absolutely terrible depending on your mindset.
Yup. My mum always tells me not to do stuff im gonna do anyway, and it just makes me feel bad for it
Daeza Kid why cant you be as pretty. Or you would be pretty if... Or your not pretty looking like this.. You should do this to be pretty. These are things ive heard 😭😭😭😭😭
I agree with that my parents say the same thing.
99.99% teens watching
0.01% parents watching.
That so sad
I'm a parent
U r right
not right
I aint even a teen
When my mom told me she was proud of me I actually always felt proud of myself from early childhood on up to even this day! To me it seemed obvious that she basically wanted to say: "Hey, you did that well, you should be proud of yourself!" My mother also told me that a lot when I was insecure about myself and the things I did. She also didn't only recognise actual results, but even if I failed she would still acknowledge how hard I tried. She never even put me down for bad grades, but either felt with me or told me "I know you could have done better." That was hard to hear at the time but honestly: She was right. Although I didn't like hearing it, it was the simple truth. All in all, all these things helped me build my self-esteem and become the person I am today. I guess it really comes down to communication and the actual message the parents want to send to their children using those statements.
Mom: Why is (best friends name) getting 95 and you're only getting 85?
Uncle: See (best friend's name )getting all the awards, where's yours?
Can some ppl not understand that everyone is diffrent? Like not everyone has long hair, not everyone likes the same pizza
oh my my , so true
Never say to anyone, not only teens, "We did something wrong raising you up"
Or Does it supposed to make feel bad.
I would tell em, good. You leaned something today.
*THE MORE YOU KNOW*
THIS RIGHT HERE!!! that's what's missing in this video
I really hope I never heard that
But I have
My mom keeps saying that. It makes you feel like you weren’t supposed to be born.
Mom,dad watch this!!!
To all them parents out there who think that only THEIR parenting methods are correct , take YT inro acccount too.
I shared the video with my parents and my uncle who is gonna have kid soon so he could use that in the future. If I spelled anything incorrectly it's cuz I'm only 10 yo
😀😀😂
I agree
@@pandagirl1012 I'm 11
If I say what I feel to my mom, today
She will repeat it in my ear over and over again
And still tell me that I need to tell her what I really feel
My mom : tell me exactly what you feel!! It's unhealthy hiding it from me
Me : you'll never understand
My heart : it's hurt
Try to say to her when you say to her you will feel better even if she didn’t understand I made this :)
Ik how U feel- ;w;
Me: *Tries to talk with my mom cause she told if I don't talk for my feelings she gonna stop my contact with my friend or something like that*
My mom: *Finds excuse for everything and says to me that my cousin is physical sick and I shouldn't complain that much and stop act like crybaby*
Me in mah mind: LOL U help so much... Thank U, U repeat I am just nothing and I only do something wrong but my cousin is the perfect person, my friendis one user and that I am just a crybaby-... 🥲
My mom:"we just pay attention to your liitle sister because she is younger"
Me:"cries every night and broken inside"
That is me all the way. Only it's my little brother
Same but its my bro
Same
Same, but if you tell ur mom they will probably said you are jeolous from her.😡😭
It's my 3 years older sister for me and they don't pay attention to me
"Your lucky, back when I was in (insert thing here) i didnt have, (insert object here)"
This phrase (at least for me) makes me feel like I need to have struggle and for it to be like when my parent was in this thing.
#BFFAEKawaiiSquad!
Yeah, I completely agree. So I actually ended up struggling more than Mom because of my undiagnosed ADD and later my depression, panic disorder, and all that anxiety. I struggled more than she did in the end, and she's told me that... In the end, if you make up with your family, things that were broken can be mended, and things that were ruined can be replaced and made new. But you can't get new parents, not without it hurting a lot, anyway.
That’s one thing I don’t get why buy something for your kids if you’re just going to make a burden out of it by constantly reminding them how much it cost.
It's almost like they dont realize as we move foward in technology, certain hardships should go away, and the quality of life improves and more choices are given in life.
#BFFAEKawaiiSquad! You put it into words! Yes!
I hate that sentence too.
"if "..." jumps from the bridge, would you jump too?"
(hate that one)
S6N 6F G6D Still there's truth in it.
Depends on the reason and relative results of jumping vs staying.
S6N 6F G6D OMG YESSSSS!!!!! 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
Well mom it depends on the person XD
Yes
#2 kinda brought bad memories. My Aunt died 2 years ago. I miss her so much. I cry myself to sleep thinking of her. I always ask her “Can you see me?”
This was a very sad memory in my life. I didn’t want my aunt to die so soon, But everyone dies at some point. My Aunt died at 60 years old.
I just hope she can see me from Heaven. I went to her funeral and I cried so much. She will always be my heart.
I bet she can see me from Heaven. I was 10 years old when my aunt passed away. Now I am Almost 13.
My Aunt is watching me from Heaven. This was a very sad memory for me. My Aunt died in November. November 2018 was kinda a bad day for me. I miss my Aunt. She will always be there for me. I miss my Aunt so much. I will never forget her...
I am crying right now
Like this comment if you feel sorry for me :(
So sorry for your loss!
@@dangerouslychatnoir4768 At least my aunt is in a better place now
dont open the edits.
.
Wow that’s super young to die my tutor teacher is 56 or something and she’s already a grandma ugh it must feel so bad to lose a loved one My mommy lost her daddy
The thing is that my parents say I’m worthless, and when I got back home (because I lived in our province) my mom said “you know what? Ever since you got here, I have always been stressed!” Which is kinda sad actually xD
Funny how the video is about teens and 95% of the images are of children and it uses the word "kid"
aldlkj that's probably because to parents the teens are still their "babies"
The title only says "teen" so the video gets more views. Most of the viewership on RUclips is aged around 8~19, so it makes sense for Bright Side to use the word "teen" as opposed to "child." It doesn't help that parents tell their younger children that they're mature for their, either, since they just categorize themselves with older groups of people.
What really bothers me is when I ask "why?" and my mom says "because I said so" It triggers me so much. Anyone else??
Yes! All the time! It annoys me so much!
*COUGH COUGH* MY DAD *COUGH COUGH*
Yes when my aunt does. Im a very logical person and require full-on reasoning. Dad respects that because he is the same way.
Yes! So true!
Yes that gets me so triggered
"I'm just protecting you" 🙄
"Aww, are you crying?? :("
So annoying
What i hear from my grandma
"your so disappointed"
"why u always say sorry to me i dont forgive you!
"i don't love you anymore"
"we don't want you here anymore!"
"go away i only love your sister not u"
What i hear to my aunt
"don't be sad"
"you got a bf im so proud of u"
"i well help you"
"i always loves you^^"
But the only thing I'm mad at and this is coming from a kid so don't even say you're one of those lousy parents just because there are negative things in school does not mean or give you an excuse not to do your work
@@ihavenoideawhatimdoing4 tch...
It’s not about that
This person has been yelled at and hated on for *years*
It seems their only source of comfort family-wise is their aunt.
@@totallyjokers I'm not talking about his family I'm talking about school
Lol I would say something like
I’ll spit on your coffin old lady!!!!
I love you too grandma!
I’m a teen and my mum says none of these, she loves my sister more that me, it’s really damaged me and every time I try talk to her, it gets into an argument, I always run upstairs and cry because she doesn’t understand me and she tells me not to talk back even though I was just explaining how I felt, she said she’ll never love me if I don’t love my sister but I love her so much but the fact she said that tears me even more...
How
And when they need help they become our "parents"
I can understand you , all these things are happening to me too so I just cry my feelings off at night when everyone is sleeping or lock the door of my room and cry alone ...
😔😔😞but now my parents are restricting me from closing the door of my room too...
If I cry in front of them they will just say "There you go again !!!" or "Stop being a crybaby you are too sensitive!!!" which makes me want to cry even moree😢😢
Tamanna Sajwan Same here! My dad is less strict since its my mum who is saying hurtful things. If I cry, it’s only at night when everyone is asleep beause I dont even have my own room so I never get any privacy, I really wish that when we cry they just comfort us instead. I hope that when I’m older life with be easier. And I can’t believe they dont let you close your door, what do they think you’ll do? Congratulations, you have just made a child who lies to you, learns how to be sneaky and probably mentally unstable. You’re not alone and I’m sure it’ll get better soon 😕💔
@@YoussefAmyn321 Thannk you ! At least you can understand me unlike my parents ...😟
as a teen a crush is the least of my problems, like i wanna have the will to live by tomorrow
lOl true.. I’ve watched my friends suffer through their relationships. I think that’s bad ;-;
Midori Green mood
Midori Green yep
Midori Green couldn't have said better!
Lisa Clown get a recorder and record him saying it. It works every time cause recorders don’t lie. Your bff will have no choice except to believe you 😊
That's why I've had a hard time fighting for my insecurities and gaining some confidence because my dad is always saying bad things about me and compared me to others as if I'm not his daughter.
exactly, why are men like this 😭
All children deserve love, equally from both parents! Stay strong!
Once I told my mom that I was depressed , she told me " Stop complaining ! There's nothing to feel this way. You're just feeling this way because you have been doing nothing and just sitting at a corner and crying for no reason. Stop making excuses and stop crying for no reason at all ". And then I was like " WHATTTT ?! ". Tbh , that made me feel more depressed than usual. I wish if she would have just hugged me , instead. Cause at that time I was just so lost and helpless and yeah I guess, that's what I needed the most. And now , I don't tell about this to anyone out there cause i feel like no one really listens to you , you know. It's about 2 years , I'm still suffering this alone. :)
My mum just always told me that I shouldn't be sad. When I am sad I want to talk to someone but I'd be blubbering my words and near everytime she has the nerve to say "I'm not going to talk to you if your gonna cry" and walks away leaving me to cry more, then she has the nerve again to come in once I've calmed and then try to be nice. Most times I am so mad at her I just scream at her to leave me alone
@@aquaroo1194 I wish if they would just sit beside us and just try to understand us. That would be so great , isn't it ?! Well , I hope you're doing okay now. :) ❤
Uddipana Das ~ my parents say “you can tell us anything”. i feel like i can’t though. i know more than im supposed to. (inappropriate stuff for a nine year old) im pansexual and like stuff im not supposed to. (music)
they want to know the real me but, i always say to myself “they won’t accept it. im too young. i need to wait till im older.”. they also always wanna know what I’m doing. i get really paranoid. im cyber bullied by random people online. i hide my emotions. im really scared of a lot of things. very paranoid. i want to cry a lot. i kinda have social anxiety. (i don’t really like to talk to people) im also depressed. ive never confessed anything. (besides being depressed) my parents give me ‘inspirational speeches’. be yourself, you’re beautiful, blah blah blah. i don’t feel the prettiness. i can’t be myself. i don’t know what to do. my life is often yelling because my mom is bipolar and my sister also is. i always get afraid of everything. i feel like something bad is always gonna happen. im starting school soon. (i was homeschooled) i feel like im gonna be bullied. my mom says “be yourself, don’t take their word to heart”. im very sensitive. i can’t really change that.
@@minyiecake ouch. That hurts. I do understand how that feels. I don't know what to say.... I wish if I could just hug you right now. I'm so sorry to hear that. You're going through so much ! You're a fighter. You're so brave ! I know you're tired of hearing such things but i just wanna let you know that - things does get better. Trust me , time heals everything or maybe it doesn't , maybe with time we just get used to it and learn how to deal with it. But eventually , it does get better. And guess what ? Sometimes it's okay to be not okay. It's okay to feel this way. Cyber bully ??! Gosh. Do something about it honey ! Don't suffer alone. You don't deserve this. And don't hide your emotions. Never ever do that. Ask someone to help you , honey. You're so brave. Just hang in there. Things will get better. Maybe not today , not tomorrow , not next week , not next month , not even next year , but one day for sure and that day you are going to say proudly to yourself " Yes I did it ! ". You deserve the best. You deserve all the happiness in this world. Take care. :) ❤
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IDK HOW TO HELP ANY OF U AND IM CRYING CUZ I CAN'T HELP CUZ IDK HOW AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA BUT MAYBE THIS WILL HELP??????????
ruclips.net/video/AJADIiCRAWc/видео.html
"You shouldn't/have no right to feel that way"
My dad says that whenever I feel upset about something he feels is "not worth being upset over", and, if anything, it makes the feeling about twice as bad and redirects most of it to him. That may just be me, or it could be common to feel this way; I don't know.
my mom says that when I get mad at her, which makes me even more mad because I can't control it
my moms when: my brother is not doing his chores, skipping the laundry, and playing video games all day: 👩🦯👩🦯👩🦯
my mom when i miss one sock in the laundry:
🤭😡❌🗣🗣🗣
It was at the moment saying "Don't Tell, hurry up, but tell this instea-" and then a trolls ad came on 😂😂😂
It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.- Fredrick Douglass
Simply Animated but what about repairing a broken child?
True
@@owolive2661 right ..
I've heard "HURRY UP OR I'M LEAVING YOU HERE!" So many times while using the bathroom
same
Amelia K no, I actually don't! It was my parents did it.
U know even now i am hearing this bcz i am a child...
HAHA SAME
Yeah.. same here
Grateful to say my parents treated me with respect and gave me so much love ❤️
#2 brought up bad memories. I was at the hospital with my entire family visiting my Grandma, my aunt says "go kiss grandma, you'll never know when she will be gone." and what do you know, an hour later, my Grandma was gone. I never knew that it would be the last time I'd see her. And to this day, 2 years later I still feel bad for not kissing my grandma.
"Adults are always right" "You have to listen to grown ups" "If someone is older than you, you have to respect them"
"You OWE me respect, without me you wouldn't be here".
My parents say respect is earned...sometimes😂😂
Lou Robichaud that's what my mom says all the time 😡😡😡
"And you wouldnt even be a parent if it wasn't for me. Also you never give ME any respect."
A old man started shouting at me cause I was ‘talking too loud’ and he said respect your elders so I told him to f^*+
WE ARE THE NEXT GENERATION
IF YOU ADULTS KEEP MENTALLY ABUSING US THE FUTURE OF THE HUMAN KIND WILL BE LIKE THE PURGE
PARENTS HAVE THE FUTURE OF THE HUMAN RACE IN THE PALM OF THEIR HANDS AND THEY JUST ABUSE IT
THE NEXT GENERATION IS GONNA BE THE END OF THE HUMAN RACE
HAVE YOU NOTICED THAT WHEN A TEEN DOES SOMETHING GOOD IT GOES ON THE NEWS AND GOES VIRAL
THATS BECAUSE GOOD TEENS ARE RARE BECAUSE OF PARENTS MENTALLY ABUSING THEM
Parent: (is doing work and needs some help around house)
Teen: (offers help)
Parent: Oh no thank you, I'm fine!
Teen: Are you sure?
Parent: yeah!
Teen: Ok! (goes off to text friends, do homework or leisure activities)
-A FEW MINUTES LATER-
Parent: (finds teen) I ASKED YOU TO HELP, I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING IN THIS HOUSE!!!
Teen: Uhhh >:(
anyone else find this situation relatable, this happens to me a lot.
(WHERE DID ALL THE LIKES COME FROM WOW!?)
forest _exe ~ i do and it’s so annoying!!
+Erin Lycan ikr?
Yep. It's annoying.
That’s my everyday life
forest _exe IKR IT HURTS ME INSIDE TwT I don’t usually ask but if she needs help she should ask me -_-
"I'm so proud of you"
Unexcitedly:
Aaa, surprising isn't it?
Shawn Mendes: "Your words cut deeper than a knife" In stitches
Bright Side:"We know words cut deeper than a knife" in this vid
Early teen here.
"Don't ask questions!"
This one hurts. It makes us feel like our questions don't matter/are too insignificant.
"I'm just looking out for you."
NO, this DOESN'T make us feel good or protected. We want to feel independent. When parents say this to us, it makes us feel like little children that need to be watched over.
"Because I said so."
This ties into "Don't ask questions". We're at the age where we always want to know what's going on. Unless it's particularly sensitive, please tell us.
"Stop complaining!"
Now, we all complain sometimes. This is perfectly valid when we are specifically trying to complain and aggravate parents. When we're simply voicing our concern, and not rudely? We don't like our concerns brushed off as complaints.
I totally agree. Being a pre teen and listening to these will totally hurt. Its just that we are not able to talk to our parents freely about all of this, or even show this vdo to them because they will be like, "Ah! Nothing like that. We don't tell anything to you guys in order to demotivate you, or hurt you." Or, they just laugh it off, which is the most annoying thing ever
Wrong if you know there's something going on you should ask because it can have long term effects of distrust. Being open and honest with your parents is showing that you can trust someone. Don't shut your parents out because there parants they ask questions because they love you. And care
@@jazminnew3757 It’s not easy to be honest when you already lose trust with your parents. It’s easy to lose trust on someone but it’s not that easy gain trust when you already made them lose your trust.
Also we learn alot on internet than school , they just dont understand us and why? Google is better than teachers because google knows almost everything.
2 and 3 are relatable to me.
okay but a teen gets waken up by his/her parents in the morning? my parents just sleep, i wake up thanks to my alarm. once i get up, i do everything myself, including breakfast
Same.
Yu Ten my mom wakes me up in the mornings I would just roll over and try to go back to step if she didn't stave there
Same here. I’ve always done that, even before middle school.
Im woke by my aunt, but Im fine with it.
Thank god i am stil in midle school
Tbh, it’s actually me who says “Hurry up!” to my parents when it looks like I’m gonna be late because I don’t want to be late 😅
Same here
Me too
Ditto
@@madelineryan548 that's my pen name 😅
#9: Those words actually motivate me to get into shape and be a perfect human being.
What you should never say to a teen: "It's just a *phase* "
Instead: "Oh man, it's that time of the month?"
Yea.
Emos: *i don't think so pal*
True-
As an 18 year old, I disagree with steering parents away from encouraging their child? I would LOVE to hear my parents say they’re proud of me. And telling me good job, or saying I’m incredible or whatever wouldn’t add to my stress level. It would actually decrease it because i would get a little time off of constantly worrying about being good enough. That’s reassurance that I AM good enough. That while I should always strive for improvement, im doing well. I don’t see the harm in that.
Sydney Tonkin the problem comes when that's all you hear. If you hear it once or twice it's okay. But if with all your effort you only get: "I'm proud of you". It is frustrating
He never specified to not give praise instead of giving praise for any of these phrases, he just gave alternate ways of saying them that helps put a different meaning into the praise they're giving.
Sydney Tonkin aside from what others said, it with ll give an impact once you failed.. A lot and they're like disappointed
Sydney Tonkin I feel like that’s more of a thing to avoid with younger children because I’m 16 and I agree with what you just said
Same, I would LOVE to hear some sort of encouragement, but no I only get pushed away for the most part. If I ever have children I will praise them for when they do the right thing, or do well on something. (Like a test.)
my parents always want me to not really react when they hurt my feelings, but when i don't they just push it until i do react and it hurts even more, then later they just barge into my room and say sorry but doesn't help and it's just really annoying.
I remember when I use to cry when my mom brushed my hair, it always hurt and she would always say something that implied I'm overreacting, then when my little sister started to mimic my cries of pain tho not feeling any (she told me she wasn't feeling pain) my mom started blaming me for the way my sister acted while she was brushing her hair. She didn't even cry while others brushed her hair amd because I would try not to cry while others brushed my hair and some didn't brush as hard. My mom just started saying "look what you did" or "if you didn't cry all the time, she wouldn't" while my sister was crying...Plus my mom and step-dad would scold me for my hair being a little too knotted, witch only made me not want to brush my hair
My mom actually says the bonus alot, one time she told everyone it was down, then a few hours later told me and only me that's it's on again but told me not to tell my siblings
At 8 : don't yell at them to hurry up. Let them sleep and miss the bus. They'll be happy to miss school. This way you'll become their best friend.
Just kidding.
naly202 20 years later, they will be your best friend living in the same house with you! YAY FRIENDSHIP!
Paradox파라독스 lol 😂
Exactly this video is bs
naly202 I Wish!!!!!!
LOL
Hey, my parents telling me that my 5 younger siblings looked up to me and mimicked everything I did made me a much better person. I was constantly thinking that whatever path I followed, they would try too. So the choices affected not just me, but all of them. Nothing wrong with telling your older children to look at who is watching them.
I too have five younger siblings and I was told that but its different for me... I began to distance myself from them because I felt that I wouldn't be the best older sister for them. Guess it's different for everyone
I have a lot of younger siblings. half and foster siblings, and i'm older than all of them. when my foster mom told me "be a good example for the younger kids" i looked at her and told her "why don't u teach them right from wrong so that way when i make a mistake, they won't follow? with ur logic u should ban tv since the people in the shows u watch r terrible role models". from that day forward, i lived how i chose, and i fell many times, but she was there to help pick me up and the children then learned that it's okay to make mistakes as long as u learn from them
Topaz 96, it truly depends on the personality of the kid, that way worked for you and that is fine. My parents knew how I operated, so their methods worked specifically for me. To each their own and I am so glad she was there to catch you when you fell and help you back up, she sounds like a really special person. :)
kp1officer well yes everyone is different, and my way of dealing with things won't always work for someone else. doesn't mean it hurts to try though lol. and yes, she is an amazing person. she constantly takes in kids who need help, and she raises them as her own. she is the best mother i ever had
I get annoyed with that statement, for the simple reason that I DON'T WANT THE PEST TO COPY ME! I WANT TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL, AND THE BEST AT ONE SINGLE THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Imagine being a parent that yells and deflects everything that your kid says. Also imagine taking all your anger out on your oldest child.
That happens to meeee!! My mom is always talking it out on me
What if we said " I'm so proud of what you've done" or is it just the "I'm". What if I'm so proud of you is something they here all the time even if they made a mistake but corrected that mistake? Could the phrase be good if they just here it all the time no matter what?
In my house no one have respect on my feelings
Same but when you try to tell a 'trusted adult' they don't listen
My parents are trustworthy
@@memerminecraft3226 Sometimes not
Same
We just all annoy EACHOTHER XD
*Talks about teens*
Inserts picture of a 6 year old
Mochi Jimin
xD
😏😏
ARMY😂😂
😂
XD 😂😂😂😂
Things that should never be said to a teen “it’s just a phase”
Parents: "If your best friend jumped off of a bridge would you do it too?"
Me: "No." *in my mind* "Of course I would they are my bestie, if they jump then I do too, I'm not a disloyal person"
Ikr
Me: Stop comparing me!
Mom: life is a comparison.
Has this happened...?
No but they did say they're doing so and so you should be like them
Life is like McDonald’s you eat it
yes
Yes
"life is a comparison" actually you shouldn't compare yourself to others
I watched this before I was a teen. Now I am one, and I DEFINITELY understand this stuff.
same
"Oh, grow up already!" is one that made me feel inferior and mentally underdeveloped. Also, telling your teenage son "You act too silly for a man with hair on his chest/armpits/other part of his body" can really hurt his self esteem and make it feel like he is trapped in the wrong body and needs to make changes to it in order to not feel defected or broken. Those hurtful phrases, as well-intended as they might be, are very damaging and need to be avoided.
Whatever you do, don’t say this to teens :
“Wake up! It’s school time”
K i got that
That word alone destroys my mood
Yeah
My mom and dad never do it. I wake up my parents.
Its really boring
Them: Ask questions like "what made you choose that colour in particular?"
Me: Um, no don't ask questions like that because I already question myself enough thank you
ikr!
Yesssssssssss so true
My Dad: *You're a teenager*
Also my dad: *Is literally entering my space during my private times*
Honestly my parents passed all of this they sometimes say I am proud of u but I understand what they mean I don’t over think it I love my parents they care for me and I will repay them and I am sooo thankful :) have a nice day/night everyone !!!
I think parents who never say “I’m so proud of you,” and “Good job,” end up with even more crumpled kids. But it’s good to know that the attention can be focused better on them by making these phrases better.
I see nothing wrong in stating, "I'm (or we're) so proud of you!" , since it truly states how I (we) feel towards my/our child/children. The statement, "Good for you!" although positive, has an air of detachment to it. I've had people (in general, not parents) say this phrase to me and no matter who said it, it always came off as sounding like the person who said it was separating themselves from me by not including how they too felt happy for and connected with me.
Kat Kristar
: Yeah, we probably think in a similar way. I also don't see anything wrong in saying: "I'm so proud of you!" I wrote a comment which mentioned my point of view for number #4 and #1. I'll copy the comment for you here:
It's an interesting video and honestly, I agree with all of the thoughts except number #4 and #1. Reasons why I strongly disagree with number #4 and #1 are described in two following paragraphs.
I'll start with number #4. Okay, I understand it's better to focus on the way of achieving the result, rather than just saying "Good job!" But I don't see why you couldn't do both things - saying "Good job!" and then focusing on the way of achieving it. I strongly disagree with that notion you shouldn't praise your child for a good job by showing your reaction. And praising him/her is definitely not in the contradiction with focusing on the way of achieving the result.
And now number #1. There is an even more upsetting point of view mentioned in this part of the video. Replacing the sentence "I am so proud of you" by saying "Good for you!" simply doesn't seem warm enough to me. It's almost like saying - "You probably feel good after achieving your goal. I don't care too much but I guess you're happy." I know it's not directly said in this way but it almost looks like saying a stuff like that to me. I would honestly prefer saying something warmer instead - for example: "That's really great you've achieved your goal! You must be so happy! :)"
I wish my parents told me they were proud...
I rather heard and still hear I'm proud of you. Good for you doesn't sound meaningful.
I approve of you as a person 😂😂😂
I agree, “good for you” seems more appropriate for acquaintances and business relationships
Now I know why I always shout when I'm mad, thanks mom.
I just want my mom to treat me equal to my sister . Sister gets praises I get scoldings.😯😐
I’m an only child it’s awesome I never get to share anything everything is peaceful
I feel bad for you I’m 9 years old currently and I’m glad I asked my mom I don’t want a sister or brother
I hope ur a teen cuz soon you can move out and have fun on your own
Same as u i have a little bro
@@rajkaur9348 I always wanted a sibling, but now that I have one, I don't want her. Being the only one child is the best!I'm 11 right now so I'm actually a tween.
@@asha2755 if ur 11 your not a teen your teen hood starts at the age of 12-13
"You're growing, that's why you are sad." Has anyone had this told to from their mom?
Edit: WOW, I thought I was the only one.
NotJoe Galvez yes, but sadly that is very often objective truth
Nope
Yup. I was told by my parents and counselors that my mood swings and depression were probably just part of being a teen. I found out later when I was 22 that those were early symptoms of Bipolar Disorder after my first manic epsode.
cellogirl11RW having mental illness is rare, having mood swings as a teen is very very common. I'm sorry for what happened to you tho. My parents also told me my OCD, Derealization and anxiety were part of growing up.. I hope they're right
Or "youre just mad because you had nothing to eat"
11:12
-"You should lose weight."
-"Did you hear our neighbour's kid do? You should take example from them."
-"I am concerned about you"
-"It's for your own good"
-"Stop living in the dreamland this thing won't make you to earn money"
-"You better be clean your room or i am throwing away everything you own"
(Some of them told to me and some of them to my friends)
moderntimes07 these are so familiar to me
moderntimes07 the last phrase i know about. My parents threaten me to throw away my electronics if i don’t do something they want
Fleurbc Playz why would they do that
The one with cleaning the room hapens to me a lot! Do parents even think that the words they say might hurt us?!
I really do need to clean my room. Let's just say it looks like a tornado struck.
"You're never gonna make it in life." "I can't wait for you to move out and go work at McDonald's for the rest of your life." "You need to get a wife and kids." This is what I hear everyday from my stepmother.
I'd prefer the second one, actually. That tells me my parent doesn't care if I leave, and I'm fine with that.
@@greatwavefan397 I will go with first cuz you make kids HAPPY and you get PAID
While being a parent your kids can be annoying or irritating
I’m talking about McDonald’s and I just realized it’s second one
Pride goes before the fall! I always hated hearing "I'm so proud of you" from my toxic parents. Thankfully, they are no longer welcome in my life.
Means