Это видео недоступно.
Сожалеем об этом.
Abandonment Issues & Fears
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 19 авг 2024
- Abandonment issues and fears have held me back for far too long. It's time to tackle it and heal some past wounds. In this video I explore how to overcome abandonment issues and fears by going through a book I discovered recently, Love Me Don't Leave Me.
If you would like to purchase the book for yourself on Amazon, you can find it here:
Love Me, Don't Leave Me
amzn.to/2Q2TxUb
Instagram: / raifderrazi
Snapchat: rderrazi
Twitter: / rderrazi
Facebook: / raifderrazifitness
DISCLAIMER: This video and/or description contains affiliate links, which means if you click on one of the product links, I’ll receive a small commission. This helps support the channel and allows me to continue to make videos like this. Thank you for the support!
#abandonment #issues #fear
Raif, prior to this video , I thought you were an amazing man. Now learning this information that saddens me greatly, I know you are an amazing man . You have great coping skills, drive,love, the desire to be the best you.
I wish I could hug you at this moment, you always impress me,you are very resilient and determined.
You are worthy of everything you desire in your life. 😀💞✈
Alexander Allan Aw crap, I don’t think I’m ready for all these comments! Y’all are making me tear up. Thank you Alexander, your kind and supportive words really do touch me. Humbled by all the support 😌🙏🏽
@@RaifDerrazi It must have been difficult learning a new language , on top of everything else? It sounds as though your mom brought you to protect you. I'm glad she did , otherwise I never would have known you. ☺
At that age I think it's pretty easy for kids to quickly pick up a new language...but it was more so the combination of so many huge changes and such instability that made things difficult for me.
@@RaifDerrazi Did you do anything fun over the Labour Day weekend ?
I had a nice time visiting my parents in Huntington Beach, we hung out poolside, played with their dog, ate good food...yea it was fun!
You are such a beautiful human. I am afraid of abandonment too. You are not alone. I’m so sorry you’ve suffered so much. May you be happy and free. I’m so thankful for you and your channel. Thank you.
Jeremy Acevedo You’re so welcome, Jeremy. Thanks for the love and support and thanks for sharing too! We got this, brother 👊🏽😉
Thank you so much for this video, and your channel. I was thinknig a lot lately about how the LGBT community has these abandonment issues. It seems to be a major thing for us even if we grew up in a healthy home. I will be sure to buy this book as it sounds like something that could help me overcome some fears. I'm happy that you were able to self-reflect about how you were dealing with these issues and also have accountability with certain things as many people like to forget about their issues which only makes things worse.
If you have not read it, may I recommend the book The Velvet Rage by Alan Downs. It is another great book that explains how gay men have immense amounts of shame we have not dealt with after growing up gay. It's a great read.
Brian Barnes Awesome, thanks for the recommendation! I’ve heard of it before but didn’t know what it was about. And thanks for the support and all...glad you appreciate the videos, my friend 🙏🏽😌
This is one of the few channels where I pay attention to every word. I usually handle most of these things quietly in my own mind. Abandonment and the fear of it is huge. I'll go as far as saying that it makes you fear love altogether. Definitely following this.
Rudi Prinsloo Yes, absolutely. I can relate to that and see it in people I care about as well. Thanks for your kind words Rudi. Let’s see how far down the rabbit hole we can go lol
Raif, these challenges in your life from Day One were given to you to help make you the exceptional young man that you now are. "Out of adversity comes the call to greatness" has always been my motto. Each of us will benefit from your ongoing discussions.........love you, man...........thanks for helping.............Ray
I agree with you 1000%. We have a choice in how we respond to life's hurdles. And if I do my best to deal with them and in turn share them so that someone else may have an easier time dealing with theirs...well then, life has so much more meaning. Thanks for the love, my friend!
So positive. You deserve the best.
I had some circunstancies like yours. And I totally empathize with your feeling. But you know that after all these tough years in my life I have realized that what happened to you and to myself make us the strong warriors we are today. Because people like us can see through things and people and we will always fight for our love ones and for our self with fury.
Keep it up, you are an awesome men.
You said it, brother! Couldn't agree more. 👊
Everyone has personal tragedies in their life. The key is to keep hope and know that changes can be positive. Your future is what counts. 😃😃
Amen to THAT!
you are such an incredible man and your soul is beautiful. you inspire me so much. you brighten my day and the entire world. keep being you.
Aw thanks Brian, just doing my best
Amazing material! Keep up with the videos, looking forward to watching even more of those
I absolutely will my friend! So glad you appreciate them 😌🙏
You are a true warrior on so many levels. Again this was a deep and emotional video, thank you for opening up to us. Always look for the rainbow in every storm, because your are a god damn superstar! 🌈
Oh man, Michael...u gonna make me tear up. Thank u for that and for believing in me. That means a lot
@@RaifDerrazi ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
I'm sorry all you've been through. You're so strong and brave and can make it
Debbie Thomas I believe God doesn’t give us more than we can handle. And if we choose to learn from our experiences we will always come out so much stronger and have so much more potential to do and be good in the world
@@RaifDerrazi beautiful words
Debbie Thomas Thank u! 🙏🏽
Fear of abandonment is very common, and it often leads to insane jealousy, which causes many toxic relationships to end. I think it's good to try to address this issue before it's too late. I appreciate your words and your genuineness. It's obvious that you're striving to give real meaning to your life and you want it to be successful. Congratulations, it takes much courage, determination and consistency to keep going the way you do !!
You're right man! I've definitely experienced that as well. And the heart-wrenching loss of losing people because they're too afraid to be vulnerable and risk the potential for loss later on...Thank you for your support! I'm doing my best
Sir, you are inspirational..... love you.
I mayb 40+ but would love to follow your channel for years, please never stop, you know you are saving so many young men with your wise words and life experiences. x
Ugh, thank u for that. That comment gave me the feels...I hope to keep putting out content that you appreciate and will help people...I certainly am not stopping! 😌🙏
What a beautiful soul you have. So awesome that your doing the healing. It’s hard, but so worth it!!!
Thank you for the love!
Hey Raif it’s Osman your stories always have important lessons. Just wanted to let you know you’re an inspiration and you gave me the courage to go to the doctor to get tested. I was told my tingles and no appetite was possible pre diabetes and a uti. She was confident these weren’t symptoms of hiv but we’ll see by Tuesday hopefully I don’t hear a phone call back. I never even comment on videos except for people that truly are amazing. Thank you for being you
Well thank you so much for commenting and for sharing. I'm so glad you appreciate my videos my friend. Also, glad to hear that it's most likely not HIV and that it's something treatable! Take care of yourself and wishing you the best
Hi Raif, I just been diagnosed with hiv about a month or more ago , and was really hard for me , Im from Mexico and all the information that i got here was about dead and a terrible life, i was so scary, i still have a lot of fear but then i found you and a light of hope just start to grown in me and i wanna thank you for make me start to bealive that i will be fine instead of feel that i will die, i don't know if your gonna see my message but i needed to say it , thank you really Thanks!
Hey, thank you for sharing David! It's true...take your medication and you will be fine! I'm so glad you found my channel and my videos and I hope that it continues to help you!
Thank you, thank you Raif...you've been through a lot...yet you are here encouraging your viewers. It's interesting that I have prayed for you to have a good support system of others...and then your video came out. Wish I could something more for you to let you know you are a person a great worth and value. I'll be here for you Raif as you go through the book.
I struggle a lot. with a sense of worth myself...and then I read Psalm 139 "How precious are your thoughts to me, O Lord, how vast is the sum of them. If I would count them, they are more than all the grains of sand..." That meant a lot to me...hope it was okay to share that.
Absolutely, thank you for sharing! I like that a lot as well. And thanks for your continued encouragement and support..I really do appreciate it all 😌🙏
the message resonates with me. you are worthy babe
Thank you. I gotta finish this book too!
Your video changed my life... I have the problem just like you.. I know the feelings , there no one love me but family but When they all gone I feel nothing...and fear.. 😔 I just have to stand out and start my journey.
You gotta be your biggest ally and protector. Love yourself unconditionally!
Relating way too much to your situation and appreciate your candidness. i thought I was alone,weird and powerless .I still do to a point, but maybe this book will help. I'm very happy the RUclips algorithm recommended you my way. Love you and your channel man 💖
@beautoxxbeautoxx haha i'm so happy the algorithm blessed me as a suggested video as well 😉 You are certainly not alone, my friend...I hope it helps
Thanks for sharing your experiences ! I was abandon by my mom at 1yrs , left to be raised by my abusive alcoholic father. I grew up never knowing what love was. I finished school /college east coast in the early 80's afraid of Aids and of dying I never dated. The Aids scare robbed me of my youth and fun. Always California dreaming I finally made it to L.A. 2001. I 've never been loved or ever had a boyfriend, I 'm grateful to be alive ! I'm glad you are healthy and surviving HIV. Thanks for sharing your videos.
Ur so welcome and thank u for sharing your story as well. I'm glad you are doing well and grateful to be alive. Life is precious
I truly look up to you ❤️ it's nice to hear we're not alone
I know isn't it crazy that we feel that way?! We're SO FAR from being alone...there are so many people experiencing the same thing. It's just if we don't talk about it we'll never know that
Raif Derrazi your videos are what help me and will help others going through these stages of depression, you're such an inspiration :)
Raif Derrazi will you be making anymore gym/fitness related videos for bodybuilding ??
Oh mannnn, I know! I keep putting it off cause there's so many things I want to vlog about...but ABSOLUTELY, yes, I intend to make more gym/fitness related videos.
Awesome Raif ! I avoid all situations that would cause me to become enraged. Anxiety and depression are a bit tricky sometimes ! I tend to listen to sad songs when depressed, I know that sounds counter productive ! Its a bit tough to get me out of that mental state. I tend to either text friends or take a nap, which usually cures those feelings. I have learned to just let my feelings run their course !
I would love for you to delve deeper into the abandonment, emotional deprivation & failure core beliefs as I resonate sooooo closely with those three !
You look sooooo😏😏😏 in that tank btw. Nice to see you smile also ☺☺.
Haha, thanks for the compliment mate.
Also, I can relate to listening to sad songs etc when I'm depressed. I used to do that constantly but I've worked on NOT doing that. Yea, there's a time to just be in your feelings and allow them to wash over you so you can process them...but then it's good to move on and not constantly put yourself in a situation where you're going to keep dwelling. That's the worst! And I'm guilty of having done that SO much in the past.
I will absolutely delve into those core beliefs more as I work through the book! Stay tuned ;)
I started nodding as soon as this video started, as an adopted child with sexual and physical abuse starting from the age of 3 I feel so many of these thing too. Have just ordered the book. x
Thx for sharing Stephen...and omg u reminded me i need to finish lol
I rarely comment on videos, but this one and the one about being abstinent really got to me.
The situation with your dad is very similar to mine.
The way you describe your journey, feelings and thoughts, it makes me reflect a lot about my own life and the choiches i’m making.
Thnxx for being a massive inspiration and please continue. You are helping a lot people by opening up the conversation.
And greetings for holland 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼
☺️
Hey Salah! Well thanks so much for taking the time to leave a comment. I appreciate it. And I'm glad you were able to relate to my experiences...I think it's a lot more common than we think. I hope it helps and the subsequent videos continue to help too!
Don't be afraid,God is always near and protecting you ,fear is from the devil,bless you much❤
Thank you for your words!
being rape from the ages if 7-11 I had a very judgmental and abusive family onto of being in the south . being gay and black my family beat the mentality of ( you aint shit , your probably going to get aids , you aint going to be shit , your the reason why I don't Love you ) being kicked out and homeless at 16 I didn't finish high school .[man this really hurts to write ] this is just my adolescent years I have been through sooooooooo much hurt in my life and for the first time in my life I can see myself in this one video .my heart was sooooooooo broken and bruised but I'm going to overcome this mindset
this video truly blessed me
Aw man, Amir thank u for sharing your story. That's intense. But I'm so, so glad you found some connection with my video. I really haven't followed up on this and continued on through the book but now I'm feeling like I should get on that
I salute you bro for being a strong person you are now.despite of your life story..My parents abandoned me also and i grew up with other people who adopted me.But im still thankful and blessed that i live independent and strong now.Take care and God bless you bro. ❤️ from Philippines 🇵🇭
JACK PINOYCHANNEL Exactly, u have such a great attitude and perception of your life. And that will continue to help you in so many ways. Mad respect
@@RaifDerrazi Thanks idol! 👊🙏❤️
JACK PINOYCHANNEL So welcome! 👊🏽
Your blog is in and of self therapeutic. It’s helping in the healing process. Good luck man.
@Abdul Manssour Glad to hear that...exactly what I'm hoping for 🙏
wow your truly amazing, i needed this video
Happy to hear that Raul ❤️🙏🏽
I’m so glad I came across this video. I stuggle with the same thing and have a similar story to yours. It’s nice to know you aren’t alone
We're both definitely not even close to being alone. Much love to u
Bro, I love you so much! I literally want to hug and not let go. I am here for you. You are amazing and am so touch by you. Please reach out, I have words of wisdom that can help. Most importantly, I can listen.
@cj cj Thank u very much brother. Much love to u as well
Hey there gorgeous, I myself and so many others feel like this so you are not alone.. Love your channel and I wish you much love and success and of course happiness...
Thanks Carmen! Thanks for sharing and thanks for your support, we gotta stick together right?
Raif what can i say. You are such an amazing person. You have gone through so much yet you challenge each moment in your life and you become such a warrior. After hearing this all i can say is i admire you even more. Your blogs are such a big help! You have taught me so much my friend and im so great full to you for sharing such hard moments in your life. It is not easy but seeing how positive you challenge each obstacle its just amazing. Can wait to hear the progress and the growth you do each day. May god bless you always my friend and may he surround you with such amazing blessing like he has down so far !!
Thanks Francisco! And thanks for your support and encouragement from the beginning. It also has helped me too and kept me focused on what I'm doing. I'm glad it's helping you too...that's the best, when you can learn from a difficult situation and then share it so other people can learn to...gives a nice meaning to things, I think
Raif i totally agree with you and im so glad you have so many people following an hearing your stories of over coming your personal challenges...let that be in life, career and family. Glad to have you as a friend !! Pretty sure you will inspire even more people ❤️🌈🧜🏼♂️👊🏻💪🏻
Thank you @raifderazzi This is a powerful and very personal vid. Thank you for sharing this with us and trusting us with this personal journey. Much love to you alway
btw - i ordered the book. be interesting to see what my results are.
You're so welcome, my friend. Thanks for joining me on the journey too! It'll be cool to go through it as a little community and discover things together. Let me know what your results are, if you like!
Love your channel bro!
Thank you! Hope to keep creating content you love 🙏
God bless you Raif!☺️
Just randomly stumbled upon your vlog and I love it ❤️ You’re inspiring me to go back to the gym.
.thank you for sharing this topic 👍😊 ...you really inspire a lot of people..keep it up. Godbless
You bet muffin 03! Thanks for the support, just gettin started, no doubt 👊
You truly inspire me and I wish you all greatness! I’m sending you a cyber hug 🤗
I felt every word you said. And the college part is my reality right now..this makes me cry so hard. I wish if i could talk to someone and let all of it out, but there isn't.
@Totally Different Awww, I'm sorry you're having a rough time but I'm glad you found some identity with my own struggles. This, at the very least, lets you know that you're not alone. Don't be too hard on yourself and just focus on today and being your best today
@@RaifDerrazi Thank you for replying! And it makes me feel better knowing that i'm not the only one, as sharing information and stories can really benefit everyone.
@Totally Different Agreed 100% Take care, my friend!
@@RaifDerrazi Thank you, You too! 😊😍
Jesus love you
Much love, my friend!
Why is it still like this 2021 not fair want to give him a hug nice guy
You have an invisible halo, your perfect.
You inspire me, I love your videos
@Drissou So glad to hear that and your'e SO welcome
The true warrior love from india
Aw shucks! Thanks, my friend 😌
I was feeling down and tou lift me up thanks
Vanessa Velazquez So glad to hear that Vanessa. You’re very welcome!! 👊🏽😉
Raif Derrazi thanks love you friend..😙😚☺
Very painful for me to hear...😔
It make,s you stronger. I,ll have you but I,m old 62 Phoenix,az. I,m from LA,CA. You put to much in to it.
Omg I think I just found my channel 😂😂♥️. I’ve been binge watching.
Teddy Onditi Hehe thanks Teddy! Appreciate that my friend. Hope to continue to bring you good content you enjoy and gain something from ☺️🙏🏽
Raif Derrazi Keep on, I’ve gained a lot from watching ♥️
holy cow. I thought my life sucked. Now not so sure anymore. Either way I have OCD Anxiety depression, all kinds of irrational fears. I Can totally relate.
That's not the point of the video, my friend. I don't feel like my life sucks, AT ALL! quite the opposite. but that is due in large part to my willingness to identify, accept and tackle my weaknesses and constantly pursue growth
Yo yo bro!!! I would love to workout with u!! Show more healthy workout out videos please. And don’t stop ✋ motivating the future😇
Yea!...i really do have to film some more workouts...LONG overdue
ya I'm now 26 and about 6 ft and 175bls i play baseball for local university her where I live. see i took a class about 2 semesters ago about the ammunesystem and I know what u are talking about I'm not HIV positive. however my ex girlfriend brother was so I know the hardship
Aw, well thanks for being such a supportive person and educating yourself and others on the issue. That's really commendable and mad props to you 👊
wish i can hug you now Raif...😢
They should put a picture of you in the dictionary under open and sincere Looking forward to more videos on this underdiscused topic Thank you
Bahaha, thanks Steve. Yea man...it kind of makes me nervous but I know that's because it's important and it's the right thing to do...
What if you’ve been told that if you’re like this, no one will ever love you? People pointed at you that you will the last choice? It still hurts me so badly even I keep telling myself that it’s not true. It’s even worse when I always find it hard to get along with others. To the point where I expect them to let me down. Please help...thanks
Pony Haly Well see, that’s exactly what I’m talking about with fear of abandonment/disappointment etc. that’s the same journey I’m on my friend
you are a great inspiration Raif. You are such an amazing and strong guy. Plz keep up the good work. can you plz tell how long did it approximately take you to develop AIDS after HIV contraction? and once you were diagnosed with AIDS , was it possible to recover and did the treatment work effectively ? I mean is it still possible to suppress HIV once it is developed into AIDS? I do really pray and hope the advancement in medicine can soon find a definite cure for HIV.
I'm not sure how long it took to develop into AIDS because I don't know exactly when I contracted HIV but I'm assuming it was about 3 years. The treatment worked effectively and my immune system greatly recovered after about 9 months to a year. It is absolutely possible to suppress HIV once it is developed into AIDS...that's what I have done.
I can identify with you but I dont get the strength to change and cope with my hiv and ti come to terms with it and start back my life which I am missing fir last 7 years h...
You have one life. You just have to decide how you want to live it.
Hi Raif! I justr subscribed to your channel may I ask how's your health? Do you have a lot of meds to take?
MsCppnpa So glad u subscribed! My health is better than it has been in my whole life, including before i got HIV. I only take 1 pill of medication, once a day. Super easy
Night sweat is also Happen in TB and many other deceased, How to differentiate its only because of HIV? Please reply
TEST. TEST. TEST.
Your so awsome.
Thank you Cedric 😌
There is no answer. One day at a time. It,s stress and it will kill you.
Hi Raif ! love your page, you are a fantastic young man. have you tryed meditation ? that's help me a lot with my anxiety and if course Sport but that i don't need to explain to you why. 😀
Lili rossi hehe yea, definitely tried meditation and, I agree, it helps quite a bit! 👊🏽😉
❤️
Re u ok nw.may God' bless you
I AM okay...I've by no means conquered this but I'm just beginning my journey. And that's so crucially important, the first step. Thanks for looking out
@@RaifDerrazi may God give you long life to leave.
Dearest Raif, I want to meet you in person. You are such an inspiration, such a sweet honest person. I really do want to meet you. Please
You are not alone! I’m most of the time alone and a person that I had just met went ghost without telling me if he is still interested about me. Probably because he just got divorced and doesn’t want to start a relationship or at least be boyfriends for a period of time 🤷🏻♂️😅 he wanted only sex at the end for what I know. I’m sure you will find that person that loves you greetings 👋
Raif!! I love your openness. And your ability to communicate so honestly about your life. You also mentioned how in the LGBTQ community some people throw shade and or are bitchy. Its one reason I personally don’t have many gay friends. The judgements of some like, how one dresses or how one maybe gained some weight or maybe going bald or whatever. The shallowness of anyone gay or straight I can’t deal with. Im not rich but im not ugly. Lol. We all have value as a human and I just wish there was less judgmental gay in gay. Its so fresh to know you are so not like that. You have that West Hollywood gym body thats hot , but love your humble loving self. 🤗 hugs my man!!!! 😘
Thanks mate, and thanks for sharing. Yea that's rough...but we have to start being more selective about who we give our heart to in the first place and that will help weed out a lot of the potential hurt down the line.
Thank yoooouuu! Yea, I firmly believe that you can love on your body and look good and also be a genuine, down-to-earth, caring person. They don't have to be mutually exclusive...people seem to forget that. I don't have a lot of gay friends as well...but then again, I don't have a lot of straight friends either. I'm just very selective about the people I allow in my life; they have to be people that help to raise each other up and not the opposite. 🙏
Please forget the past, live the present moment. You are in good health and you are strong, that what counts... Remember you are so far better millions of people than.... This is how you cope with it ! I hug you.. welcome in my home. Email me to know the destination of your truop. Regards and warm hugs..Celine Dion & Barbra Streisand - Tell Him with ..
Thanks for the support
hey man, you seem like a pretty cool decent awesome dude.
Thanks tonka1983, I most certainly am 😉
Why are members of our own LGBT community so hateful and judgmental of each other? That has driven me crazy since I first came out 25 years ago. I don’t understand it. Here we fight so hard to be accepted by the straight community, yet we tear each other down in our own community. It doesn’t make sense to me.
Our community has a very large pain body...and we want so badly to be ACCEPTED. so when something threatens that we push back...even if it's hypocritical to what we've been through personally. It's like high school, and we've been the outsiders and we so badly want to fit in with the cool kids that we will turn on anyone who gets in our way
I like your old style hair :(
lol, i'm playing around with different looks, let me LIVE!
Please .Write. A. Book.
VelvetSun funny u should mention that, I’ve been getting a TON of signs from the universe that I need to start writing. So I’ll just say that it absolutely 100% on my mind to do
Raif Derrazi ooohhh ;o; i would so buy it
Do you pray?
i do! me and God go way back
@@RaifDerrazi Then why do you dress immodestly for the whole world to see & lust over your body?I get people need attention and love their sensual side but do you think the good Lord appreciates that?
I think the good Lord is not distracted by silly negative perspectives that pull focus from all the potential good 😉
@@RaifDerrazi That was a cheeky reply,Raif and i was pointing the truth but you found it negative.
nikhil thomas nah. Saying it’s immodest is YOUR truth, immodesty is negative when you’re contrasting it with the will of God. Therefore, ur negative truth. Not mine.
What's your ethnicity?
Raif iv seen your videos. I think your amazing, no joke! Wondering if you wanna video chat. I wanna get to know u.. Let me know💗
Thanks for the love, not looking to vid chat thooo
Hey Bimbo! Are you up for adoption?
LOL whaaaaat? Naw, i'm a wild animal