At work, I’d start every day by saying good morning to my coworkers, regardless of whether or not they would respond. I’d always treat them with respect - bcs I refuse to stoop to behaving childish. I recognized that, although it required effort, it made me feel better about myself to act in the way that made me feel proud of myself.
I like your attitude. Thank you for inspiring to keep saying good morning to my boss, regardless of whether he responds or not. Even if the boss excludes me in social interactions, that is fine. Do I need the information for work? Do not need. Even if the boss ignores me or rolls her eyes, I am fine. I find him childish to be honest.
Wow, I love this. I believe treating people well increases self esteem. I have done this to a small extent and it helped me believe that I deserved better when I was mistreated because I knew my character.
It’s not about being childish be careful not to judge and trivialise it’s important thing to remember it’s self care and self awareness to ground and protect oneself first and foremost before coming into contact with this these types of individuals.
One thing that I have found always helped me was realizing I did the best I could. A toxic job environment can't be changed by a single person. Don't feel bad you straight up quit and removed yourself from that situation - it doesn't make you a failure, it probably taught you a lesson on self-respect and what you should absolutely not tolerate. Another thing is, sometimes you discover a job is toxic TOO LATE because it was marketed as the opposite - again, don't feel bad you fell for it. You were not blind. They were manipulating you. It's never too late to say "I matter more than any paycheck, screw everyone here" :)
I'm in a job that I plan to leave, and it's allowed me to really follow most of these tips with zero fear of being fired, and honestly when you remove that fear, it changes everything. It feels like I hold more power than when I had that fear, and it's allowed me to shamelessly enforce boundaries.
I feel guilty for being so negative and in such a foul mood at work. I wasn't always like this. When I first started working with this agency, I was excited and positive. Now, I mostly keep to myself and give the auto response of "good" when someone asks me, "Hey, how's it goin?" as they pass, by without listening to my response. I feel like everyone at work is on autopilot or has a facade where everything and nothing is funny, especially when you're a higher up, and the lower you are on the totem pole, the less they care. I'm leaving soon, so it doesn't matter anymore, I just hope the next person that I provide support to doesn't laugh at me for my ideas or have random outbursts when I'm only doing my job. I'm a human being for crying out loud!
As an I-O psychologist and OD Architect specializing in toxic organizations, I must emphasize that there is no empirical evidence supporting the idea of "surviving" in such environments. Toxic organizations can lead to serious mental health issues, including personality disorders, PTSD, anxiety, depression, high attrition rates, job burnout, and decreased workplace commitment. Research shows that even if changes are made, employees often leave because the damage has already been done. Therefore, the most responsible solution is to leave the organization. Sharing ineffective strategies-especially those that didn't work for the person suggesting them-can be harmful. Remember, behavior is infectious; a traumatized employee can contribute to further chaos in the workplace. Prioritizing mental health and seeking healthier environments is essential.
Thank you for your input. I have had 3 toxic interactions in my first 5 weeks of work. First I was accused of copying someone else’s chart notes because the same people made more than one visit to see a patient (weirdos) My role as a nurse and I don’t have a computer to chart on, if a laptop is available it’s missing a mouse, I don’t have a phone near to call Dr or receive reports from hospitals. I didn’t have keys to supplies for 4 weeks. I don’t have a contact list of specialists to call for my dialysis patients, My CNA is getting high in her car 1hr before dinner and 1hr after dinner and leaving 30min early. My med aide is coveted by the management team so she thinks she can yell and tell me when to jump and how high I reported her then had to tell her to stay out of my face They gave ME a verbal warning saying I was unprofessional If it keeps being toxic I will have to move on. I have to run circles to do my job and the two nurses have their work stations set up across the way. I keep having to beg to be set up properly. I will wait a few more weeks but start looking for another work now
Hi @@SanctifiedLady, thank you for sharing your story. I encourage you to free up your mental and emotional space and consider finding another job. In the past, I've given toxic organizations the benefit of the doubt, but they rarely improve-even after I leave. Research shows that negative attitudes in poisonous work environments can be contagious, and it sounds like you're already feeling the impact. The trauma you’ve experienced for simply following policy is especially troubling. It’s unfortunate, but such organizational trauma can sometimes turn valued employees into toxic ones, perpetuating a negative cycle. For instance, I left a company 13 years ago, and they’re still grappling with the same issues that drove me away. I learned this by reconnecting with former colleagues and hearing about their ongoing struggles. Their reputation hasn’t improved; in fact, it remains quite poor in the area. Your health should be your top priority. I’m still recovering from health issues related to my last job. As a remote employee, I experienced a blackout and injured myself. My blood work even indicated a false positive for liver issues. This experience has left me hesitant to apply for new roles due to fear of facing similar challenges again. It’s important to recognize that your situation may worsen, especially since you’ve voiced concerns about a colleague who may be well-liked or has connections in the organization. Unfortunately, dynamics like cronyism and gossip can significantly affect your standing. In short, prioritize your well-being and consider moving on. You deserve a healthier work environment. Run, Forrest, run!
I really needed this video today. Even for an introvert such as myself, my work environment is isolating, exclusive and can be toxic. It's overwhelming to me, that on my day's off, I just vegitate unless I have something I need to do. I know that's not good for me and I'm allowing it to consume every part of my life, but sleeping is my go to ritual, and I need to write down things that bring happiness and comfort, and as you stated, being intentional about those positive things for ourselves. Thanks, Jennifer ❤️
I'm a hardcore introvert too - knowing when you need to recharge the introvert battery and honor the process is sooo important. Thank you for sharing what has helped you, Joan! Also I have on my list a million videos that center on career success (and politics) as an introvert. I need to poll to see who else is around here (I suspect a lot like us!)
Music & a book always helped me escape my job with positive consequences. Alcohol & 🍕 were fine but left me a bit sluggish the next day. A good nights sleep always led to a better day ! Have A Great Day Jennifer 😀
I really wish I had seen this video several years ago when I was in the depths of surviving a toxic job environment. I would wake up at 3am every morning and rush to the bathroom with dry heaves because my body was already dreading the day that was to come and the pervasive hostility I faced from particular co-workers. I lasted about 4 months until the physical, psychological and emotional stress became too much and had to quit. I definitely agree about setting boundaries and engaging in little rituals that set up some semblance of normalcy for your life. For me, that was enjoying a cup of coffee before heading into work in the morning and then taking little breaks for myself throughout the day.
Quick point to add: maintaining a positive vibe when you're in a toxic work environment does not mean you should stay in that toxic job! If you have hung with me for a while, you know my only solution to a toxic job is to ESCAPE the toxic job. If you need an exit plan make sure you go watch this video to create your toxic job escape plan: ruclips.net/video/TVmU_EPoooU/видео.html
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I NEEDED this! I've reached the point where I'm getting on my own nerves by complaining about work. I'm spiraling into depression, and my feelings around my toxic work environment are taking me down. I'm going to begin implementing your methods beginning... now!
Your point about those negative inputs all day long is for real and has a ridiculous affect, that takes forever to remove. Gratitude has saved my butt too! Thanks for sharing. Also LOVE this >> "You get to chose the energy that you live in"
I was once made to sit in the same cubical area with this girl who gave the silent treatment to everyone. She was negative, angry and would just yell. Naturally nothing was ever done about it and if anyone ever spoke up(including me) we were just told do our job and be an adult. I finally quit but I’ve heard thru the grapevine she’s still up to her ways and makes everyone lives miserable. I can’t believe this behavior is tolerated.
It's ridiculous and I'll never understand it (well, I *understand* it, I just don't agree with it). If the company is okay with having a miserable and toxic work culture, that's their choice. You knew it wasn't for you, I'm proud of you making aligned decisions based on that info.
You're truly a career bestie. I appreciate you recognise that the content should not focus on the negatives too much and instead talk about positive and empowering strategies. I had indulged in job-hating which was damaging to my wellbeing and made me feel hopeless because it was something I could not change. Switching to what I actually can do made a huge difference.
It's so normalized this whole you're supposed to hate your job thing. And that is such a BS story that is told to make us settle for jobs that aren't aligned with us. I'll probably make a video on this :)
Equivalent of 'think yourself positive' & toxic positivity. While alcohol and ruminating may be bad for you, expressing how you feel and allowing your emotions to take up space and be processed, is one of the most important things people can do. Pretending everything is okay and not venting out your negative emotions is a recipe for disaster and I know too many people with high blood pressure and heart problems from toxic workplaces where they just pretended everything was ok.
Ah this video is totally what I needed today. I love the type of work I do. But I am a naturally work related anxious person with feelings of bad self-confidence and combining this with quite very toxic workplace is a deadly combination. I lost so much confidence in this new job in 9 months, that it has affected my private life and relationship. I will try with these tips.
Started my job 2 years ago, lately my manager says "your awful quiet" . I'm a naturally laid back quiet person but do speak. Another time she walked in first thing in the morning and said I looked grumpy, I was looking at a spreadsheet. I feel like she's trying to figure me out and is insecure. I'm literally sick of her behavior , trying to find ways to cope.
I can list dozens of behaviors you could seem toxic in any given scenario. Deeming each as toxic signals unhealed trauma. I tell you this with so much love, because this belief system will cause you continued harm. We both want better for you, because you deserve better 💜
@@lemaxx2638 I wrote an article over on LinkedIn about this last night because I really wanted to nerd out on the science; but there is neurological reasons for this. Trauma literally changes your brain; your amygdala is more sensitive and likely to trigger (sensing threat, activating fight/flight/freeze - this leads to adrenal burnout and a lot of other things), while your prefrontal cortex is negatively impacted (thinking, logical - can't turn on when the amygdala is active). Psychologically, you'll have coping behaviors and defensive mechanisms that became habit to survive the toxic environment So there are neurological reasons for this. However, our brains are adaptive. I'll spare the rabbit hole about neuroplasticity. I know how hard it is to imagine not existing in this state when you're in it (my toxic job was so bad I was hospitalized and experienced generalized anxiety and panic attacks for years after). But I promise healing is possible and there so so many normal companies out there 💜 Sending so many positive vibes your way.
@@JenniferBrick thanks a lot my dear, what you doing is precious to me and many people that we have been exposed to trauma, and due to that we behave awkwardly at work. Now I have a good job with an amazing manager, but due to my lack of confidence on myself and others due to bullying on the past .... sometimes I create a negative narrative on my head, and then is the only moment I get motivated to fight these toxic people that my head or my past is creating, probably ghost, because I do honestly think this people are nice, but my mind is make strive only when I have difficulties.. its a very deep and complicated thing, I felt so guilty to be myself toxic and think that people hate me at my current job, today my boss asked me if I'm happy here, I really think he notice that I'm becoming low on energy and withdrawn...but as you said I think I need to adapt and nurture a positive narrative.. I don't have a choice
@@lemaxx2638 the beliefs we hold are based on past experiences; we project that toxic experiences when we don't identify and rewrite the beliefs. If you haven't checked it out, I have a live workshop called WTF Happened coming up, and I'll be diving really deep into this but mostly walking everyone through the process to find these toxic beliefs, and shift them them. I have a low price on it for accessiblity and an early bird discount. And I am not trying to be gross and salesy, I am really excited to put this out there because I know it will help the people who are ready for it. No matter what, I really am sending so many vibes your way. You deserve to feel safe at work, and to be happy and successful in all areas of your life.
I set boundaries today and the manager got so angry and tried to guilt me into complying. I’m sick of the fake niceness until u draw the line and then it’s like how dare you
Thank you Jennifer- this is much needed advice! Ranting less, taking action on hobbies and finding a way out of that environment seems like the ticket indeed. Having outside of work friends seems to be helping also as they can help expand networking and give some different insights. Oh, and yeah alcohol doesn't do the trick, 100% agreed. Haven't gone down that road and don't intend to. In any case, greatly appreciated!
Don’t let a toxic job ruin your life. It did for me for many years and I blindly justified remaining there because it was a brand and had decent benefits. But I realized (and I wished earlier on) that we all have a choice and there are many better opportunities out there. Life is too short so just believe in yourself and work your network with people you know who love their careers and are thriving rather than sticking it out for a company’s public reputation and benefits.
Same here being mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for 12 years. Top workers for 38 years have never been suspended. Jealousy and misery. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, i dink, i'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. They removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroys my reputation. I will never quit to make these bums ever win and if I transfer to another hospital and mobbing starts again I don't know all the managers ect like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. Never let bullies try to control you from quitting. Never let bums win in life.sss
Your videos are seriously helping me get through a difficult situation at work. And they seem to come just in time :-) very much appreciated, thank you!
Reading the Bible from Genesis to Revelation following Calvary chapel ontario. This has really helped me cope and deal with toxic people and situations in all aspects of my life. These toxic people existed biblically and they are evil spirits...discernment skills will help you avoid entanglement in the first place...
I totally agree; my philosophy is based on energy and there is good / bad and low/high. I think when we see that deeper level like you do it helps us navigate it. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective and what has served you, Mungu 💜
I’ve been binging all of your videos! Lately I’ve been in such a weird headspace at work! Made a few mistakes, not for lack of trying either and the vibe has just been off! I’m getting into my own head a lot and it’s making me depressed.
I hope my videos are supporting and helping raise your vibe. I know it's such a weird place to exist in. If you need a little more, check out the workshop I linked in the description. It's going to go though my process of dealing with the trauma and shame and starting to step back into a really empowered and high vibe place. It might be helpful 💜 (and if not, just keep watching, I just felt inspired to plan next weeks video and it's spicy but its gonna be a 🤯'er)
That's exactly where I'm at. I've shut down and already left my job emotionally/mentally. It is soul destroying 😢. I had an interview last week and one next week so hopefully I will be able to escape soon...without notice!! Good luck
Some really good advice here. I'm lucky that I am alone for my morning routine so I can put the radio and listen to something I like so it's like "me" time. I'm bringing a little something of myself into work and taking back a little control of my environment. Also browsing information to do with toxic workplaces can be a pitfall to make you feel worse but is also important to do, as this is one place you can learn coping tactics and also be alerted to situations where you could be tripped up at work and learn to avoid them. It can be difficult to do but it's important to find the balance between finding out stuff you might need to know and then being able to move on with the rest of your day.
You have hit the nail on the head, again! This is beautifully composed and is preparing me, and others, for a better work life! I worked my butt off in a toxic work environment with rituals until I couldn't and hit burnout.
I'm so glad it resonated. Lots of folks unsubscribed on this one - I know some of the advice wasn't comfortable, but I truly believe it's what is needed 💜 (and my job isn't making people comfortable, it's making more successful)
Just what I needed to hear this morning! I also really appreciate your effort to shift towards positive content, even though the negative content will likely get you more clicks in the short-term. Positive content is healthier for me so that’s what’ll make me keep coming back to your channel over the long-term -> valuable advice that’s given to us in a positive way. 🙌👏👏👏👏👏💖
It's hard because I definitely won't stop tackling inherently negative topics. We can't talk about toxic jobs without that vibe being there. I see my job is help you and everyone else watching to clear those toxic vibes and live empowered and successful lives. Honestly, I know a much smaller percentage of humans truly desire this, but I also know A LOT of them already hang here like you 💜
@@JenniferBrick You are right! I can see how it’ll take a little maneuvering to talk us through negative things but in a positive way. You did it beautifully in this video! I’m excited to hear what you talk about next- I appreciate you, your mission, and your content! 💖
Set BOUNDARIES. Seen so many of my co-workers quit because they never set this boundaries and would only be aimed at people pleasing. I have multiple bosses, toxic AF. But I realize that it is unrealistic to get all those tasks done in one day. I just get done what I can and push that “extra” work to the following week.
I found that toxic people need to be heard or someone to complain to so their complaint is validated so I don't give them that space, I connect to the positive people and there are way more people who hate the toxic person as well and they need positive so when your connected to positive people the toxic people swim in their own toxicity..
I left a toxic af work place where a psycho idiot female was obsessed with me and kept talking bad about me to others and turning them against me. The idiot supervisor backed her up and promoted that ghoul. I dumped that sh!thole within a year! Now I'm working in an awesome place with the BEST coworkers I've ever had! Please don't put up with a toxic work situation.
I have appreciated the wisdom in your content- but I think this shift greater enhances your value. Thinking about strategies in a more positive light feels more sustainable. Thank you for sharing your content.
I see my job as helping you ditch the toxic energy and create your best career and life. That isn't possible when your sympathetic nervous system is in constant activation so while I'll still tackle the tough things others generally don't and tell the truth - I personally feel better and like all our conversations are more productive when we're intentional about uplifting our vibes. Glad you're here! 💜
I had a toxic job and when I came home I would put on upbeat music and clean for 20 minutes. That helped me though I should have left sooner than I did
My job likes to transfer people around and it’s usually to break up toxic teams which results in a longer commute for me while everyone else in the company is within 20 min
In a situation where I work with one person and they complain about EVERYTHING for 12 hours straight....not to mention the manager and the deputy manager, help?
Thank you! How should I react when coworkers demand to know about my personal life? I am a single woman and over 35 and get tons of questions. Once my boss demanded to see my boyfriend’s picture! I needed that job but I will need all my jobs and I know people will ask these questions again.
I'm making a video on this, especially on resetting boundaries when you have overshared / indulged - it'll be up in 2 weeks I think. In the meantime, I am a huge fan of deflecting. Use humor so it's like not tense to start, like "Well that's TMI" or "Why would you want to see his picture?" (with the tone of oh that's so funny but kinda awks you're asking, if that makes sense). This hints at the boundary without making it weird or confrontational. Diversion can also help, "Oh forgot this really important question for you / email I need to reply to, /etc" But clear communications are also okay, "I'm not confortable talking about this at work."
Hello, you can try. In a lot of cases it’s like “talking to a wall”. Some of these bosses do not have empathy and are empty shells. Wishing you the best. I tried standing up and was retaliated against because I spoke the truth.
You're so spot on!! I didn't realize I was doing any of those coping mechanisms. Good thing I'm out of that job tho. It's been a month and I'm still releasing the trauma my body holds.
My job sucks. But i am grateful that i dont work with jerks. In a huge way that makes it better. After many jobs this team dynamic was very hard to find....jerk free! Uber overtime though
This sounds like merely surviving a toxic work environment. Nothing wrong with that I guess but to me surviving anything sound more like being a victim to circumstances. I know making any attempts at a “Vive la Resistance” backfires normally but it shouldn’t come down to just merely surviving.
Next time say "so you're trying to?" xD almost guarantee if you don't give em the response they want (slow down emotions and think before reacting), and give a great comeback, they'll stop. Not to say it's remotely acceptable (the mess some people start), just some thoughts
Its difficult for me to stay positive at work, mostly due to one person, this one person has caused approx. $2 million in loss in the last 2 years in a company that has an average of $20 mil a year in sales, it seems like this punk cant do no wrong, I have never seen anything like this in a work place it the over 30+ years i have been in the workforce. Good people have quit because of this, i am just an idiot and stay there, Many just have developed a I dont care attitude, I am just there for a pay check now.
@@smoothiecutie2277 if you cant stand too many of your coworkers, don't try to stay. They may lie about you and try to damage your career and ability to get another job.
@@msme2400 true but it’s even worse when it’s mobbing by both bosses and coworkers. They force you out. So called “bosses” give you work to do and then LIE and say that you didn’t do it when they were watching you. I resigned. Health first. They will reap what they’ve sown.
At work, I’d start every day by saying good morning to my coworkers, regardless of whether or not they would respond. I’d always treat them with respect - bcs I refuse to stoop to behaving childish. I recognized that, although it required effort, it made me feel better about myself to act in the way that made me feel proud of myself.
Pride in ourselves and not DOWNGRADING who we are to adapt to the situation is so important. Keep me the conscientious and kind human you are 💜
Good idea!
I like your attitude. Thank you for inspiring to keep saying good morning to my boss, regardless of whether he responds or not.
Even if the boss excludes me in social interactions, that is fine. Do I need the information for work? Do not need.
Even if the boss ignores me or rolls her eyes, I am fine.
I find him childish to be honest.
Wow, I love this. I believe treating people well increases self esteem. I have done this to a small extent and it helped me believe that I deserved better when I was mistreated because I knew my character.
It’s not about being childish be careful not to judge and trivialise it’s important thing to remember it’s self care and self awareness to ground and protect oneself first and foremost before coming into contact with this these types of individuals.
One thing that I have found always helped me was realizing I did the best I could. A toxic job environment can't be changed by a single person. Don't feel bad you straight up quit and removed yourself from that situation - it doesn't make you a failure, it probably taught you a lesson on self-respect and what you should absolutely not tolerate. Another thing is, sometimes you discover a job is toxic TOO LATE because it was marketed as the opposite - again, don't feel bad you fell for it. You were not blind. They were manipulating you. It's never too late to say "I matter more than any paycheck, screw everyone here" :)
"It probably taught you a lesson about self-respect" yes it did, good to read it from someone else
I pray and read the Bible before work and go for walk before and after work and it helps.
I'm in a job that I plan to leave, and it's allowed me to really follow most of these tips with zero fear of being fired, and honestly when you remove that fear, it changes everything. It feels like I hold more power than when I had that fear, and it's allowed me to shamelessly enforce boundaries.
I feel guilty for being so negative and in such a foul mood at work. I wasn't always like this. When I first started working with this agency, I was excited and positive. Now, I mostly keep to myself and give the auto response of "good" when someone asks me, "Hey, how's it goin?" as they pass, by without listening to my response. I feel like everyone at work is on autopilot or has a facade where everything and nothing is funny, especially when you're a higher up, and the lower you are on the totem pole, the less they care. I'm leaving soon, so it doesn't matter anymore, I just hope the next person that I provide support to doesn't laugh at me for my ideas or have random outbursts when I'm only doing my job. I'm a human being for crying out loud!
It’s every where!!! I’ve quit jobs before because of toxicity Im not going to keep running but I got to do something
As an I-O psychologist and OD Architect specializing in toxic organizations, I must emphasize that there is no empirical evidence supporting the idea of "surviving" in such environments. Toxic organizations can lead to serious mental health issues, including personality disorders, PTSD, anxiety, depression, high attrition rates, job burnout, and decreased workplace commitment.
Research shows that even if changes are made, employees often leave because the damage has already been done. Therefore, the most responsible solution is to leave the organization. Sharing ineffective strategies-especially those that didn't work for the person suggesting them-can be harmful. Remember, behavior is infectious; a traumatized employee can contribute to further chaos in the workplace. Prioritizing mental health and seeking healthier environments is essential.
Thank you for your input.
I have had 3 toxic interactions in my first 5 weeks of work.
First I was accused of copying someone else’s chart notes because the same people made more than one visit to see a patient (weirdos)
My role as a nurse and I don’t have a computer to chart on, if a laptop is available it’s missing a mouse, I don’t have a phone near to call Dr or receive reports from hospitals. I didn’t have keys to supplies for 4 weeks. I don’t have a contact list of specialists to call for my dialysis patients,
My CNA is getting high in her car 1hr before dinner and 1hr after dinner and leaving 30min early.
My med aide is coveted by the management team so she thinks she can yell and tell me when to jump and how high
I reported her then had to tell her to stay out of my face
They gave ME a verbal warning saying I was unprofessional
If it keeps being toxic I will have to move on.
I have to run circles to do my job and the two nurses have their work stations set up across the way.
I keep having to beg to be set up properly.
I will wait a few more weeks but start looking for another work now
Hi @@SanctifiedLady, thank you for sharing your story. I encourage you to free up your mental and emotional space and consider finding another job. In the past, I've given toxic organizations the benefit of the doubt, but they rarely improve-even after I leave. Research shows that negative attitudes in poisonous work environments can be contagious, and it sounds like you're already feeling the impact. The trauma you’ve experienced for simply following policy is especially troubling. It’s unfortunate, but such organizational trauma can sometimes turn valued employees into toxic ones, perpetuating a negative cycle.
For instance, I left a company 13 years ago, and they’re still grappling with the same issues that drove me away. I learned this by reconnecting with former colleagues and hearing about their ongoing struggles. Their reputation hasn’t improved; in fact, it remains quite poor in the area.
Your health should be your top priority. I’m still recovering from health issues related to my last job. As a remote employee, I experienced a blackout and injured myself. My blood work even indicated a false positive for liver issues. This experience has left me hesitant to apply for new roles due to fear of facing similar challenges again.
It’s important to recognize that your situation may worsen, especially since you’ve voiced concerns about a colleague who may be well-liked or has connections in the organization. Unfortunately, dynamics like cronyism and gossip can significantly affect your standing.
In short, prioritize your well-being and consider moving on. You deserve a healthier work environment. Run, Forrest, run!
I really needed this video today. Even for an introvert such as myself, my work environment is isolating, exclusive and can be toxic. It's overwhelming to me, that on my day's off, I just vegitate unless I have something I need to do. I know that's not good for me and I'm allowing it to consume every part of my life, but sleeping is my go to ritual, and I need to write down things that bring happiness and comfort, and as you stated, being intentional about those positive things for ourselves. Thanks, Jennifer ❤️
I'm a hardcore introvert too - knowing when you need to recharge the introvert battery and honor the process is sooo important. Thank you for sharing what has helped you, Joan!
Also I have on my list a million videos that center on career success (and politics) as an introvert. I need to poll to see who else is around here (I suspect a lot like us!)
I completely resonate with being and introvert and still feeling isolated at times!
I go through this as well and you explained it perfectly. 🙌🏾💯
❤
Music & a book always helped me escape my job with positive consequences. Alcohol & 🍕 were fine but left me a bit sluggish the next day. A good nights sleep always led to a better day ! Have A Great Day Jennifer 😀
Excellent point on rest - not only is it restorative, research indicates dreaming is a way we process emotions (so it's like therapy without effort).
I admit, been there, done that, and all it got me was wider hips and a hangover. I agree, sleep makes a huge difference.
@@mymentorjane6705 omg same.
Love the idea about taking a nature walk after work every day! A great way to detox from the toxicity.
Being here is making me feel like I am becoming Toxic
Things can change , always be watching out for a plan B . You dont owe your employer your health , mental or physical .
👍👍👍
I really wish I had seen this video several years ago when I was in the depths of surviving a toxic job environment. I would wake up at 3am every morning and rush to the bathroom with dry heaves because my body was already dreading the day that was to come and the pervasive hostility I faced from particular co-workers. I lasted about 4 months until the physical, psychological and emotional stress became too much and had to quit. I definitely agree about setting boundaries and engaging in little rituals that set up some semblance of normalcy for your life. For me, that was enjoying a cup of coffee before heading into work in the morning and then taking little breaks for myself throughout the day.
I'm sorry you went through that. No job is worth that amount of dread. Peace.
I just spent 25 years in a toxic work environment for a pension! I hope I will recover.
Quick point to add: maintaining a positive vibe when you're in a toxic work environment does not mean you should stay in that toxic job! If you have hung with me for a while, you know my only solution to a toxic job is to ESCAPE the toxic job. If you need an exit plan make sure you go watch this video to create your toxic job escape plan: ruclips.net/video/TVmU_EPoooU/видео.html
What if the toxic environment is created by your own staff who sometimes have passive aggressive behaviour.
GRATITUDE…. so important👏🏽 I seriously “hunt the good” in all aspects of my life✊🏽 Great discussion Jennifer👩🏼
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I NEEDED this! I've reached the point where I'm getting on my own nerves by complaining about work. I'm spiraling into depression, and my feelings around my toxic work environment are taking me down. I'm going to begin implementing your methods beginning... now!
I work with negative people at my job. I have to stick it out I can't afford to quit.
Your point about those negative inputs all day long is for real and has a ridiculous affect, that takes forever to remove. Gratitude has saved my butt too! Thanks for sharing. Also LOVE this >> "You get to chose the energy that you live in"
True, only I am in control of my feelings so it starts with me.
You're the only person you are in control of 💜
I was once made to sit in the same cubical area with this girl who gave the silent treatment to everyone. She was negative, angry and would just yell. Naturally nothing was ever done about it and if anyone ever spoke up(including me) we were just told do our job and be an adult. I finally quit but I’ve heard thru the grapevine she’s still up to her ways and makes everyone lives miserable. I can’t believe this behavior is tolerated.
It's ridiculous and I'll never understand it (well, I *understand* it, I just don't agree with it).
If the company is okay with having a miserable and toxic work culture, that's their choice. You knew it wasn't for you, I'm proud of you making aligned decisions based on that info.
You're truly a career bestie. I appreciate you recognise that the content should not focus on the negatives too much and instead talk about positive and empowering strategies. I had indulged in job-hating which was damaging to my wellbeing and made me feel hopeless because it was something I could not change. Switching to what I actually can do made a huge difference.
It's so normalized this whole you're supposed to hate your job thing. And that is such a BS story that is told to make us settle for jobs that aren't aligned with us. I'll probably make a video on this :)
Equivalent of 'think yourself positive' & toxic positivity. While alcohol and ruminating may be bad for you, expressing how you feel and allowing your emotions to take up space and be processed, is one of the most important things people can do. Pretending everything is okay and not venting out your negative emotions is a recipe for disaster and I know too many people with high blood pressure and heart problems from toxic workplaces where they just pretended everything was ok.
Ah this video is totally what I needed today. I love the type of work I do. But I am a naturally work related anxious person with feelings of bad self-confidence and combining this with quite very toxic workplace is a deadly combination. I lost so much confidence in this new job in 9 months, that it has affected my private life and relationship. I will try with these tips.
Started my job 2 years ago, lately my manager says "your awful quiet" . I'm a naturally laid back quiet person but do speak. Another time she walked in first thing in the morning and said I looked grumpy, I was looking at a spreadsheet. I feel like she's trying to figure me out and is insecure. I'm literally sick of her behavior , trying to find ways to cope.
Hang in there!
All the jobs have some degree of toxicity, there is disgusting individuals everywhere 😒
I can list dozens of behaviors you could seem toxic in any given scenario. Deeming each as toxic signals unhealed trauma. I tell you this with so much love, because this belief system will cause you continued harm. We both want better for you, because you deserve better 💜
@@JenniferBrick you right, but when you have been so much exposed to toxicity, a small thing means loads
@@lemaxx2638 I wrote an article over on LinkedIn about this last night because I really wanted to nerd out on the science; but there is neurological reasons for this.
Trauma literally changes your brain; your amygdala is more sensitive and likely to trigger (sensing threat, activating fight/flight/freeze - this leads to adrenal burnout and a lot of other things), while your prefrontal cortex is negatively impacted (thinking, logical - can't turn on when the amygdala is active).
Psychologically, you'll have coping behaviors and defensive mechanisms that became habit to survive the toxic environment
So there are neurological reasons for this. However, our brains are adaptive. I'll spare the rabbit hole about neuroplasticity.
I know how hard it is to imagine not existing in this state when you're in it (my toxic job was so bad I was hospitalized and experienced generalized anxiety and panic attacks for years after).
But I promise healing is possible and there so so many normal companies out there 💜
Sending so many positive vibes your way.
@@JenniferBrick thanks a lot my dear, what you doing is precious to me and many people that we have been exposed to trauma, and due to that we behave awkwardly at work. Now I have a good job with an amazing manager, but due to my lack of confidence on myself and others due to bullying on the past .... sometimes I create a negative narrative on my head, and then is the only moment I get motivated to fight these toxic people that my head or my past is creating, probably ghost, because I do honestly think this people are nice, but my mind is make strive only when I have difficulties.. its a very deep and complicated thing, I felt so guilty to be myself toxic and think that people hate me at my current job, today my boss asked me if I'm happy here, I really think he notice that I'm becoming low on energy and withdrawn...but as you said I think I need to adapt and nurture a positive narrative.. I don't have a choice
@@lemaxx2638 the beliefs we hold are based on past experiences; we project that toxic experiences when we don't identify and rewrite the beliefs.
If you haven't checked it out, I have a live workshop called WTF Happened coming up, and I'll be diving really deep into this but mostly walking everyone through the process to find these toxic beliefs, and shift them them. I have a low price on it for accessiblity and an early bird discount. And I am not trying to be gross and salesy, I am really excited to put this out there because I know it will help the people who are ready for it.
No matter what, I really am sending so many vibes your way. You deserve to feel safe at work, and to be happy and successful in all areas of your life.
I set boundaries today and the manager got so angry and tried to guilt me into complying. I’m sick of the fake niceness until u draw the line and then it’s like how dare you
Thank you Jennifer- this is much needed advice! Ranting less, taking action on hobbies and finding a way out of that environment seems like the ticket indeed. Having outside of work friends seems to be helping also as they can help expand networking and give some different insights. Oh, and yeah alcohol doesn't do the trick, 100% agreed. Haven't gone down that road and don't intend to. In any case, greatly appreciated!
Don’t let a toxic job ruin your life. It did for me for many years and I blindly justified remaining there because it was a brand and had decent benefits. But I realized (and I wished earlier on) that we all have a choice and there are many better opportunities out there. Life is too short so just believe in yourself and work your network with people you know who love their careers and are thriving rather than sticking it out for a company’s public reputation and benefits.
I'm a big believer that no matter what that Toxic Job has going for it, there is something better coming for you after it 💜
I'm in that situation now. The benefits are PHENOMENAL, but the work environment is beyond toxic. I dread going to work every day.
Same here being mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for 12 years. Top workers for 38 years have never been suspended. Jealousy and misery. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, i dink, i'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. They removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroys my reputation. I will never quit to make these bums ever win and if I transfer to another hospital and mobbing starts again I don't know all the managers ect like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. Never let bullies try to control you from quitting. Never let bums win in life.sss
Your videos are seriously helping me get through a difficult situation at work. And they seem to come just in time :-) very much appreciated, thank you!
So glad these conversations are supporting you, Crystal 💜
Reading the Bible from Genesis to Revelation following Calvary chapel ontario. This has really helped me cope and deal with toxic people and situations in all aspects of my life. These toxic people existed biblically and they are evil spirits...discernment skills will help you avoid entanglement in the first place...
I totally agree; my philosophy is based on energy and there is good / bad and low/high. I think when we see that deeper level like you do it helps us navigate it. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective and what has served you, Mungu 💜
I’ve been binging all of your videos! Lately I’ve been in such a weird headspace at work! Made a few mistakes, not for lack of trying either and the vibe has just been off! I’m getting into my own head a lot and it’s making me depressed.
I hope my videos are supporting and helping raise your vibe. I know it's such a weird place to exist in. If you need a little more, check out the workshop I linked in the description. It's going to go though my process of dealing with the trauma and shame and starting to step back into a really empowered and high vibe place. It might be helpful 💜 (and if not, just keep watching, I just felt inspired to plan next weeks video and it's spicy but its gonna be a 🤯'er)
@@JenniferBrick Right on, I’ll take a look. Thanks again!
That's exactly where I'm at. I've shut down and already left my job emotionally/mentally. It is soul destroying 😢. I had an interview last week and one next week so hopefully I will be able to escape soon...without notice!! Good luck
Some really good advice here. I'm lucky that I am alone for my morning routine so I can put the radio and listen to something I like so it's like "me" time. I'm bringing a little something of myself into work and taking back a little control of my environment. Also browsing information to do with toxic workplaces can be a pitfall to make you feel worse but is also important to do, as this is one place you can learn coping tactics and also be alerted to situations where you could be tripped up at work and learn to avoid them. It can be difficult to do but it's important to find the balance between finding out stuff you might need to know and then being able to move on with the rest of your day.
You have hit the nail on the head, again! This is beautifully composed and is preparing me, and others, for a better work life! I worked my butt off in a toxic work environment with rituals until I couldn't and hit burnout.
I'm so glad it resonated. Lots of folks unsubscribed on this one - I know some of the advice wasn't comfortable, but I truly believe it's what is needed 💜 (and my job isn't making people comfortable, it's making more successful)
Thank you for making this video. All of your videos are helping me through my current "character building" season.
My positive thing of today that I am grateful of is that I watched THIS VIDEO🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟😁
Just what I needed to hear this morning! I also really appreciate your effort to shift towards positive content, even though the negative content will likely get you more clicks in the short-term. Positive content is healthier for me so that’s what’ll make me keep coming back to your channel over the long-term -> valuable advice that’s given to us in a positive way. 🙌👏👏👏👏👏💖
It's hard because I definitely won't stop tackling inherently negative topics. We can't talk about toxic jobs without that vibe being there. I see my job is help you and everyone else watching to clear those toxic vibes and live empowered and successful lives.
Honestly, I know a much smaller percentage of humans truly desire this, but I also know A LOT of them already hang here like you 💜
@@JenniferBrick You are right! I can see how it’ll take a little maneuvering to talk us through negative things but in a positive way. You did it beautifully in this video! I’m excited to hear what you talk about next- I appreciate you, your mission, and your content! 💖
Set BOUNDARIES. Seen so many of my co-workers quit because they never set this boundaries and would only be aimed at people pleasing. I have multiple bosses, toxic AF. But I realize that it is unrealistic to get all those tasks done in one day. I just get done what I can and push that “extra” work to the following week.
Exactly! And the extra work, they generally don't even notice. If it was all important they wouldn't be overloading you with it, right
Thank you, your videos are so realistic and transparently relatable.
I found that toxic people need to be heard or someone to complain to so their complaint is validated so I don't give them that space, I connect to the positive people and there are way more people who hate the toxic person as well and they need positive so when your connected to positive people the toxic people swim in their own toxicity..
I meditate to help me and sage myself after work and a sea salt bath with essential oil’s to clear.
I left a toxic af work place where a psycho idiot female was obsessed with me and kept talking bad about me to others and turning them against me. The idiot supervisor backed her up and promoted that ghoul. I dumped that sh!thole within a year! Now I'm working in an awesome place with the BEST coworkers I've ever had! Please don't put up with a toxic work situation.
Yea I normally find another workplace. Im not with that “stick it thru”. Im good, I go on with my entire life simple.
I found the place with the BEST coworkers until the psycho idiot female came in and ruined it all, she says everyone hates me now 🥲🥲
This video couldn't be more timely.
Glad it was here for you, friend 💜
Do you do sessions? I wish I found you years ago. You have been so helpful! I can’t help thinking that my higher power led me to your videos
I have appreciated the wisdom in your content- but I think this shift greater enhances your value. Thinking about strategies in a more positive light feels more sustainable. Thank you for sharing your content.
I see my job as helping you ditch the toxic energy and create your best career and life. That isn't possible when your sympathetic nervous system is in constant activation so while I'll still tackle the tough things others generally don't and tell the truth - I personally feel better and like all our conversations are more productive when we're intentional about uplifting our vibes.
Glad you're here! 💜
Thank you Jennifer! This is soooo on point!!!
I love saying a cheerful "Good morning"... with no response... Do I continue to say good morning or come in and say nothing??
I had a toxic job and when I came home I would put on upbeat music and clean for 20 minutes. That helped me though I should have left sooner than I did
My job likes to transfer people around and it’s usually to break up toxic teams which results in a longer commute for me while everyone else in the company is within 20 min
Thanks for your leadership Jennifer. I’m leaving a government organization that’s literally an insane asylum..
Very good. I need to listen to this everyday.
So many great points-I unfortunately allowed this to happen to me in past jobs. Not anymore
In a situation where I work with one person and they complain about EVERYTHING for 12 hours straight....not to mention the manager and the deputy manager, help?
How about managers that cuss a lot when they’re forming sentences???
Thank you for the wonderful video
It really helps to stay optimistic
It's hard when you're surrounded in negativity but we have control over our own energy
Ridiculously important.
Really good advice, I need to find better coping strategies
Sorry but some of us haven’t found anyone plus what about the ones who “thought” to have found “mr right” & instead he was the wrong person???
I love this channel you rule
Thank you! How should I react when coworkers demand to know about my personal life? I am a single woman and over 35 and get tons of questions. Once my boss demanded to see my boyfriend’s picture! I needed that job but I will need all my jobs and I know people will ask these questions again.
I'm making a video on this, especially on resetting boundaries when you have overshared / indulged - it'll be up in 2 weeks I think.
In the meantime, I am a huge fan of deflecting. Use humor so it's like not tense to start, like "Well that's TMI" or "Why would you want to see his picture?" (with the tone of oh that's so funny but kinda awks you're asking, if that makes sense). This hints at the boundary without making it weird or confrontational. Diversion can also help, "Oh forgot this really important question for you / email I need to reply to, /etc" But clear communications are also okay, "I'm not confortable talking about this at work."
Oh no! Avery!
I can’t decide if it’s worth it to try and stick up for myself to the bosses or if it’s a waste of my breath cos they are so toxic a f
Hello, you can try. In a lot of cases it’s like “talking to a wall”. Some of these bosses do not have empathy and are empty shells. Wishing you the best. I tried standing up and was retaliated against because I spoke the truth.
You're so spot on!! I didn't realize I was doing any of those coping mechanisms. Good thing I'm out of that job tho. It's been a month and I'm still releasing the trauma my body holds.
👉Life is too short. Be nice to people you encounter this life time. Toxic boss will get their turn. Pay back is a BITCH. Peace ✌️
My job sucks. But i am grateful that i dont work with jerks. In a huge way that makes it better. After many jobs this team dynamic was very hard to find....jerk free! Uber overtime though
❤️❤️❤️
☺️
This sounds like merely surviving a toxic work environment. Nothing wrong with that I guess but to me surviving anything sound more like being a victim to circumstances. I know making any attempts at a “Vive la Resistance” backfires normally but it shouldn’t come down to just merely surviving.
It comes down to leaving. Most people can't just walk in and quit and not have a paycheck in 2 weeks.
My toxic manager once informed us that he had never tasted another man's semen. At work. During lunch. Seriously dude, boundaries 🤦♀
I literally just gasped outloud reading this.
@@JenniferBrick Oh the stories I could tell...
Next time say "so you're trying to?" xD almost guarantee if you don't give em the response they want (slow down emotions and think before reacting), and give a great comeback, they'll stop. Not to say it's remotely acceptable (the mess some people start), just some thoughts
wtf who says that!?
@@kill3rclown690 An insane person with boundary issues 🙅♀
Don't interrupt your own video mid-sentence for promos. RUclips already does that!
Topic is very fine but u speak so fast
Its difficult for me to stay positive at work, mostly due to one person, this one person has caused approx. $2 million in loss in the last 2 years in a company that has an average of $20 mil a year in sales, it seems like this punk cant do no wrong, I have never seen anything like this in a work place it the over 30+ years i have been in the workforce. Good people have quit because of this, i am just an idiot and stay there, Many just have developed a I dont care attitude, I am just there for a pay check now.
Supermarkets uggh
No benefits package or sweet paycheck is worth a toxic job. Take actions to GTFO asap.
Thank you!!
@@smoothiecutie2277 if you cant stand too many of your coworkers, don't try to stay. They may lie about you and try to damage your career and ability to get another job.
@@msme2400 true but it’s even worse when it’s mobbing by both bosses and coworkers. They force you out. So called “bosses” give you work to do and then LIE and say that you didn’t do it when they were watching you. I resigned. Health first. They will reap what they’ve sown.
Quit
Disgusting.