Why People Get Upset When You Say No (Narcissism, Boundaries, Self-Esteem)
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- Опубликовано: 26 фев 2017
- Website: selfarcheology.com
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The description you put on both ends of the low self-esteem spectrum.seem to describe the codependent and the Narcissist. This was helpful, thanks!
You're welcome, B Psyked :)
If you really want to know if someone has your best interest at heart, do the complete opposite of what they want you to do. You'll find out right away.
What is that supposed to do?
@@Notme811_you I think: if they really respect you for who you are, they respect your choices. Even if they would've done it differently. If they want to put their opinion on you or they want to change you, it's not a healthy relationship.
My folks don’t take no for an answer and they’ll either become pushy, manipulative and or angry. I had to part ways from all of them.
Most people take no personally and have a false sense of entitlement to others time and energy.
I just had a group of people get mad at me because I told them kindly not to put my number in group messages with others that I don't know without my permission.
You had the that right to say so 👍
My mother got mad at my brother's fiance when she said she wanted to wait until she got a promotion to get married. So every time the fiance was brought up in conversation, my mother would mock her for thinking she'd ever be promoted. The fiance did nothing wrong, just made her boundaries clear. But my mother took it personally. It's just so entitled.
Literally just happened to me. Funny thing is another person literally does the same thing but tries to shame me🤣🤣🤣
I'm 35. Had to tell my mom simply that "I don't like to answer questions all the time" because she was ignoring my facial expressions/social cues after asking certain repetitive annoying questions. Then she instantly went from happy to very annoyed which really pissed me off because she exacerbated the problem by doing that. So I asked for an apology and she became even more annoyed. I was at my wits end and very angry at that point, but then I thought: Since I love her, and she absolutely will know my boundaries, Im going to write her a note re-enforcing my boundaries while also explaining why her reaction exacerbated my problem. So I did. I won't keep quiet anymore about my boundaries until people understand how it makes me feel when they cross them. I'm just tired of being the nice guy that listens to absolutely everything people say, and I have every right to feel annoyed and let them know when I am.
People pay hundreds of dollars to hear what you're telling us now.
And it is interesting because one major reason therapists become therapists is to learn more about themselves and to grow themselves. In some big ways we give way too much of our power over to them.
My boyfriend is currently mad at me and is giving me the silent treatment because I said No to giving his coworker a ride.
This is a big sign of mental and emotional abuse. Remember you have a right to say no.
Dump his ass
Legend has it he’s still waiting for the ride
Mines is giving me the silent treatment for not sucking him
100 percent right about Narcissist. They are weak and NOTHING. Great video
It's chrismas and I broke up with my family and everyone tighed to it this summer. Blocking every facebook things and not responding to distant relatives trying to email me(who are in contact with my family). It's hard to set boundaries, Iv'e never done it before. This video was timely for me :) Thank you Darius!
I think maybe I've started to notice that people like this don't like to let things go until you say they are right. Or until you see things their way even if they are being invasive.
Is it me or do I find it fucking stupid that people don't take "no" for an answer especially parents and bosses? Goddamn ridiculous
It's their sense of entitlement, which is one of the hallmark dark personality traits common among narcissists / sociopaths / psychopaths.
@@selfarcheology that's also sad as hell
reconciling our culturally promoted isolation with our human social needs becomes even more difficult as we age....also the problem is clarifying so some wisdom does accrue.
thank you for your archeological perspective!!
Great explanation!
Met a guy and chatted for about 10 minutes, thought he was interesting, gave him my number. Chatted for two days, he invited me over and I said no because I had work. He got aggressive and angry. Instantly told him there are 🚩 just based off of his reaction, and I wouldn't be caught near him.
My first thought was (as a victim of various abuse), "What if he makes advances and I say no? Will he even stop? If he is this aggressive because I said no, what else is he capable of?"
You didn't even care enough to suggest another day or anything? Just "no i cant i have to work"? On the first time he invited you over? Really? Lol yeah you definitely ruined that. No wonder he was mad.
@Danzo3649 Oh wow, I forgot this comment existed. But, since you getting snarky, might as well update you. The guy ended up stalking me and found me on a night out. He harrassed and grabbed at me. I broke his nose.
After that, I heard nothing from him and didn't seen him anywhere.
About 3 months later, he was caught doing the same and harrassing an 18 year old at his work. He actually got physically voilent with her.
So...
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but the guy was a walking 🚩
thank you thank you thank you
Anger is a masculine trait. Crying is much harder to deal with.
What happens if such a narcissistic person is a family member, how should I react with such a person. Fighting, Talking has all led to nothing but passive aggressive behaviour, sabotage and stress ans so on.
For me I say I say what I have to say calmly and if they keep going I just laugh it off.
@Pr.incorporated so true.. I just move out. I can't handle to live with my dad
Nice beard genetics! this look suits you really well in my opinion :)
yeh
As an example when you Daily plans Are thrown away for Others needs it’s so annoying
I understand that Narcissist and Empaths have Trauma and it’s not easy to have to put Boundaries up but I have had a lot of healing and I have wanted very hard and I cannot be unhealthy again. I really love the Narcissist and he is two different people ( I have a Also have a side that comes out and I extremely blunt and I feel the energy of the other person and I cause Narcissistic injury because I am blinded by their false self) and the person I fell in love with is a lie. I am authenticate partly because liars trigger me. It sucks because I know no matter how much I love him will not resonate with him and I get the life sucked out me by people like that. I know people can heal and it takes a long time and A lot of work and I still have a long way to go.
Jordanne
Because of my actions, I always think the thing I've seen as irrelevant, Because I thought they are much better than that, and in the end I was only damage severe for just being logical & nice..
Does anybody have tips to deal with these kinds of people