Nikki Glaser Doesn’t Mind A Micropenis | CONAN on TBS
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- Опубликовано: 10 мар 2020
- Nikki helps a lot of women and one brave man in the CONAN audience.
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Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
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Nikki Glaser Doesn’t Mind A Micropenis | CONAN on TBS
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Good on Conan for telling the cameraman not to zoom into that guy.
I know a lesbian host who would've shamed that guy if all this happened in her show😂
😄
Rohail Aayan Siddiqui 🤣🤣🤣
Lol
No doubt. Hilarious also
This is not a comedy routine. This is a Ted Talk.
@Nigel Henry, you’re more of a stereotype than she ever could be...
Nigel Henry that’s just not a stereotype but go off
@Nigel Henry I actually agree with you, if yer gonna be sexist you need to be factual atleast, and this is factual
Her specials are somewhat that. The way she described anal sex was... Wow.
Mike Schwartz Nigel made a damn good point! He’s 100% correct! You on the other failed miserably!
"you have toys, hands, you can cheat on him"... This woman is insane😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂funny as hell isnt it
Absolutely insane...which is why...I’m now attracted to her....
@@spdadventurer1754 it's funny as a quick joke, the unfunny side is that
With ALOT of women its actually true.
@@jeffhair3552 boo hoo
That was my favorite part 🤣
Basic rule of thumb: Under promise and over deliver.
That's actually not bad.
In fact it reminds of line from one of the Star Trek movies, Scotty tells Kirk that it will take 3 hours to fix their engine, but Scotty can do it in one.
I dont remember the scene exactly, but Kirk said something along the lines of:
"Scotty, do you always claim a project will take longer than necessary to complete?"
And Scotty replies: "Of course Captain, how else can I keep my reputation as a miracle worker?"
FOLLOWING THAT RULE, here is the money, then:
Hey baby, lets go to the park, it will be great, YOU WON'T FEEL A THING!
If that doesn't get you breakfast, tell her It will ONLY TAKE A MINUTE.
Sure enough anyone can over deliver those promises, even if the first minute requires oral.
I had a friend who got laid all the time doing the complete opposite though, lol. Nearly every girl I'd talk to who he'd been with would say he'd over glorify it and talk big, but was lacking "down there" lmao. But it worked for him somehow. He kept getting women over and over again just talking a big game and exuding confidence, even though it was basically a sham.
@@DeathBringer769 most men do that. Just eat salads, that will do the trick.
@@thecowboy9698 a true king
"Don't put the camera on micropenis man!"
Lmao Conan always delivering some great lines.
Cuz it's Conan
And right after that Andy richter came into the frame 😂
Back on Late Night they would have jumped to a close-up of Max Weinberg with a stamped "micropenis" on screen.
And yet Fallon gets the prime slot!? 🙄🤦🏼♂️
@@robhost4271 I saw that too. 😂
She said more words in 7 minutes than I have in 7 years
Coz dogs cant talk
Women tend to have 15-30k words per day. While men average 6k word per day.
Τry Amy Shumer..She is faster.
@@2Times22 not nearly as funny though.
“I’m going to shame my own boss?”
Best line ever.
I speak English as a second language, so her spitting so fast feels like a test and I think I passed it. Now on to Rap God.
lyrics: I'm beginnin' to feel like a Rap God, Rap God
All my people from the front to the back nod, back nod
Now, who thinks their arms are long enough
To slap box, slap box?
They said I rap like a robot, so call me Rap-bot
asdasdasdgasgdgasgdhasgdgasgdhasdgagsdgagsdgasgd
asdasdashdahsjdhashdzaszdahsdhashdhahsdhashdhasd
asdhashdashdahsdhasihduqwhuhdqubsjdbajhsbduzqwgudhu
asdbahjsbdubauzsbda
why be a king when you can be a god?
You write and formulate thoughts in another language better than majority of native speakers.
Facts
if you are learning english please stop watching her. unless you want to learn the worst type of english
haha
I love how she doesn’t cut Conan off and always allows him to finish his sentence. Great guest
Right! She is a chatty girl but a chatty girl who knows when to let others speak is key
You mean, she allows him to keep talking when he rudely talks over the top of her? You love a woman who shuts the hell up and let's the man keep going when he interrupts her, is that it???
@@philsurtees arf arf. Bark byaörk
Wow. I think you have no idea how incredibly sexist that comment was.
@@philsurtees Thats it
“I’m going to shame my own boss?”
Best line ever.
Omg that line was amazing. Haha
@DarthShuaider She's a comedian, it's all a bit lmao. It's literally her stand up
Loved that she took that out of the nowhere
@@viniciuseneas4036 it's not. It's a bit.
Save obama
I love her style of just rushing through punchlines instead of building up and pausing for laughs.
She says she does that out of fear of stopping being funny ;p
It seems to be common among female comedians. I wonder why...
True, good observation. Shes not bad, in that rude girl way
That the quality of the stand-up comedian
Id prefer a style of talking at a normal pace
That's how I as a German imagine a stereotypical US American TV show
The funniest thing as that connan went to Harvard to end up talking about dicks and vaginas on Tv.
@@arturovidaurri84 😂
Are you the stereotypical German engineer?
You should tape your own mouth shut, and save a loved one the trouble...
@@rodturner6759 Woah, why are you so mean to me
@@rodturner6759 Chill bro
I love the woman's attitude of gratitude for her success. Her delivery is all about surprise, the golden rule of comedy, and not always understood even by professional comics. Brilliant stuff.
That title is going to grab a lot of people
And the people who it grabs get their micropenis never
But probably not by the penis
that's the point.
I couldn't resist LOL
I didn’t see it
Conan is/was the last of the late night hosts who didn't suck. Seriously.
Craig Ferguson
Tim Allbritton he’s the worst
Girl what u mean was what’s gonna happen to Conan what do u know who do you work for 🔫
@@EikottXD I thought Craig Ferguson was off the air?
He is about the only one who isn’t political 100% of the time.
I like how she laces her sentences with one sharp punchline. She's extremely smart.
“Hastily packed suitcase.” Can’t stop laughing.
You should've watched the clip where she actually says it on Conan first.
dropping down to the floor
Whenever nikki is on Conan, she always appreciates him at the end. Always. She is an amazing gal. Love her. And yep, I am a conan head fo sure... !!
Conan is a living legend indeed.
Long time conan fan here as well. I'm always happy to see someone appreciates conan's work.
Watch her episode on Conan’s podcast. It’s great
@@luislima3476 The podcast is just so good. Conan, Matt and Sona together are gold.
To be honest, I totally relate to her. Conan is one of the nicest and funniest people and at this point he is about a big of a legend as they come for people my age (30's). Made me laugh so many times and yet still is a good and decent human being.
@The Sprawl yep, it’s gold
Conan: *"You are very attractive..."*
Nikki: *"Yes, keep going..."*
Sooo.. she realized after being on Joe Rogan that men doesn't want to be with her.
Now she lowered her standards to micro-penis level LOL.
@igeto12 anyone who can watch 3 hour JRE podcasts of Joe's steroid-injected head about to pop while he talks about some crackpot medical advice he read on Twitter is a real weirdo IMO.
@Diarmid O'Connor what?
@igeto12 what?
@@neil2451 seems like he hurt you somehow.
I hope you can survive :)
"Hastily packed suitcase". Hilarious.
I’ve seen this interview a few times over the years and it still makes me laugh out loud. Girl knows to ambush us with unexpected punchlines that are hilarious.
She's hilarious because she gives it to you straight and isn't afraid to be herself
comedians have roles man...
Awesome micro penis joke! She gives it to you... Straight
The irony of your username is amusing
Too bad this segment wasn't funny
Gives it to you straight....I see what you did there.
I love that Conan doesn’t try to control the interview he just lets her run with what ever she wants! Killed it.
thats why he is better than jimmy
The boss joke was on point
“I’m gonna shame my own boss-“ 😂😩😩😩🤣
Little offended how RUclips is recommending this for me..
Micropenis
Oh I thought it was because I liked Conan. DAMMIT
Well there's at least 2 of us
I’m just freaked out..
And yet, Here we are...
this wasn't a comedy bit. she was speaking from experience
That IS her bit.
Mildly attractive, oversexed girl with a potty mouth. Aka skinny Amy Schumer
both?
This person is so uninteresting and unfunny . Get some intelligent people. I know he does but sorry. This clown , no no Nanette !
Wait! She has a micropenis!?
@@jimfritz9503 hmm... she's quite perceptive and knows how to express herself and reflect on things... she seems quite bright and interesting to me... and surprisingly funny for such dicey topics :D
Honestly, it's real talk with jokes and it's extraordinary.
Never heard of this woman but her comedic timing and serious facial expressions when she says wild stuff is hilarious
Look up her Comedy Central roasts 😂 there’s a best of/greatest of… of just her roasting celebrities, she’s by far my favorite 😂
It's funny but it gets old. She's a one trick pony
She’s hot, funny, smart, and cool as hell.
Disagree. Not that she's not funny or hot or cool but she's apparently just learning what real women have known and been teaching each other for years. Women who can't figure out how to get men to keep it in their pants are just as dumb as men who can't attract women without money.
And batshit crazy
Christopher Gordon I think your suddenly attracted because the title
@@adamlucas4753 it's not that they can't, they just won't, and that can work for some women while for other not. There's no such thing as "real women" honey
@@paolanazzaro8966 Wow, that's pretty insulting to the women in your life. I know plenty of real women, sorry you don't know more of them.
No other guest elicits as many hand on forehead "Oh my god" reactions from Conan as Nikki does. She kills it every time. 🤣
I love how open and honest she is, it's so refreshing. It's so nice to hear other people talk about their insecurities and to just be real for a bit...
“Like a court jester has a message for the king.” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Can someone explain that one for me?
@@TheOssumPawesome unraveling a scroll and it hits the floor.
I was on the floor on that one. Like the message...and her labia...
Oh my god i died so hard at "I struggle with insecurity bc unfortunately I was born-- a woman."
She has some really clever lines like that. That type of punchline is so witty, and it's one of my favorites. Another one she did during the zoom interview w/ Conan where she was talking about how cool her parents are. "They're really cool.. also known as alcoholics. No, but I really shouldn't say that because they quit... uh, talking to me."
they are called "paraprosdokians" - a type of figure of speech
@Steven Bristol true .men show it a lot through misogyny and general unjustified violence...
@Steven Bristol True. Look at most comedy shows and see whose body is the butt of the joke. It's a man.
@@fenecofeneco19 yah bad man do it just like bad women show it a lot through misandry and general unjustified manipulation
A hastily packed suitcase is still a suitcase, and suitcases come in all shapes and sizes. Find the one best suited for whatever your packing.
Permission to unlock the truck comes at a much higher standard
My heart melted when she said all those nice things to our boys
She's right, Conan has the best show, hands down.
Deckard Cains old squeaky voice gives me the impression he's so helpless in Diablo "Don't hurt me, I'm just an old man"
Up and down u mean
But does he have the best hands, show down?
When she was on Conan's podcast, she was also engaging with Sona & Gorley so much more and involving them in the conversation much more than any ohter guests. She really looks out for others.
She's an amazing host, and I'm not just talking about HPV. She's also really great radio and television host! xoxoNikki
"Listen. When you unbutton my pants, it's gonna be like the court jester has an announcement for the king." 😂😂😂
I LOVE this and everything she talks about. So needed and she makes it awesome to hear too xdd
Conan has the classic "I don't like where this is going" look.
He actually luvs it though cuz he knows it's comedy gold.
He has to.
But you know he loves it!
Like the court jester has a message for the king 😂😂😂😂😂
You might hear a horn in your ear haha
That line was totally unexpected and epic 😂
That was pretty good but I think she missed an obvious one with a little more punch.
"When you unbutton my pants, you're rolling out the red carpet"
I should've been a joke writer, I know, hold your applause.
I was ask girls if it hangs down like a wizards sleeve
She learned so much specificity from conan
Wow the energy! She really brought it and delivered on this show!
She’s the best. One of my favorite comics. Her timing is sooo elite. Second to none.
“Those same leadership skills brought this company into the black” I’m dying, she’s funny as hell.
Very underrated joke! Nobody seemed to catch that
I didn't get it
Michael Philps me neither
hows about a micro penis with a major tumor problem. like a 17 inch problem.
She’s referring to her boss having the courage to whip out his penis, who is she to shame him to put it back. “It’s those leadership skills...........” she says it quick.
I've been fortunate enough to actually run into her at my starbucks here in Hollywood, CA. She was incredibly nice to me. Glad she's getting the attention and success she deserves.
So, you met her through serving her her coffee and scone at Starbucks?
@@IPlayOneOnT.V. Yup! Pretty much. She was incredibly nice!
@D D You saying that is low class
@@IPlayOneOnT.V. Hi I'm a normal enough woman from Los Angeles who respects celebrities and their privacy AND (not but) I'd like to know where exactly this starbucks is so I can just be near her once in a blue moon. Thank you and good night
@@saskialida2488 are you single?
So glad she exists, most celebrities and show business people are just attractive and confident, so seeing her talks about her struggle with body image and dating is like therapy
I keep coming back to this. This is so good. Lmfao
“It is not anything that I intended, it’s not what this show is built for...” haha
"It's not what this SET is built for."
I love Nikki and her general enthusiasm, as well as her clearly genuine geeky fan-crush on Conan.
She's awesome! Happy New Year Nikki!
She’s the most thoughtful creep ever 😂
"You just saved that man's life..." indeed Conan indeed...
Reads the title
"I still have a chance"
what's on her nose? ... get a tissue!
Shailesh Rana Watches the video
Nope, just another joke
I experienced a "micro" once and it was incredible!...on the funny, flip side of that.. the guy drove a corvette ...both rocked!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Of course he drive a Corvette!
😆
Wow I have a micro penis myself and I have a problem satisfying a woman. Sorry for being so blunt but when you have a penis the size of a baby carrot literally means the struggle is real. I don't even have a car lol
The respect Nikki has for Conan and Andy and the show makes me love Nikki even more.
She is damn funny and her little one liners are hilarious
Hi Theresa ! 😚
yo
@@Bigboro haha creep no response.
@@Bigboro 😹👎 RIP bozo
3 inches ruclips.net/video/AjKaal__Rdg/видео.html
Everybody should be more genuine about who we are and what we think. We are stuck way too much in our own heads
David Padilla true
pun intended? lmao
She is not being genuine.
We probably think too much about
our own "heads"! LoL!
Too much information. Not attractive.
I love her. "Soups On!" "I'm really stumblin onto some things here!" Damm this girl is fun! Conan desperately trying not to stare at her legs.
This has been the best conversation I have ever heard! 😂
"The court jester has a message for the king!" "Soup's on!" Actually laughed out loud twice. She is hilarious.
"It's like the court jester has a message for the king" -- I've never heard it put like that before. Priceless!
What a lovely lady. 💕
She is an amazing human. And always funny. I wonder how a serious conversation would be
"you just saved that man's life." Haha I'm dead
Rip
She’s packing a large roast beef and cheddar from arbys
Poppy seed bun?
She has...THE MEATS.
Yeah when she queefs it looks like a party favor.
👍
Fellas thanks for making me laugh out loud during this weird time we’re in lol. 👍
Conan really is the best. I’ve been a fan since the very first premier episode
You guys are just great!!!
They compliment each other SO WELL.
This woman is amazing. Never fails to make me laugh.
Nikki Glaser cracks jokes as she breathes. She can't even help it! She is one of the most naturally funny people I've ever seen.
She is funny, but this is all a bit. None of this is spontaneous
This got really wholesome at the end
I love when she's on Conan. They have such great chemistry.
Miruna Hodo insofar chemistry goes, she ranks somewhere up there with Jeff Goldblum.
chucky606 hell yea
Conan has a bachelor's in Psychology by now especially after this interview.
conan have such a villian laugh
Feel personally attacked being recommended this.
This girl is so nice in every way. Notice how thankful she is to be invited on the show. She’s not some entitled typical Hollywood person that thanks it’s a god givin right. Her parents must have raised her well.
her parents are great !!!!!!! The lie detector clip was hilarious !!!!!!!!
I've noticed that whenever she does interviews she always gives the interviewer props and generally connects with them and asks them about their lives, expresses gratitude, etc. honestly it's really sweet and I don't know of anyone else who does that. She is very confident but also humble, that is a great combo.
Always nice to discover a new funny af comic, my weekend binge is sorted.
You have VERY low standards.
Awww, she's a sweetheart
So since nobody’s saying it let me then. Nikki and Conan should do a segment together. Or at least a clueless gamer.
Conan had Nikki on his podcast awhile back. She opened up a lot in that episode
They should make a sex tape.
There hasn't been a Clueless Gamer since the middle of last year :-(
@@lmcgregoruk high speed games with realistic graphics might kill him.
@@campersruincod6134 I concur!
The amount of words she can say per minute is award-winning
that was immensely socially enlightening.
It looks like Conan does enjoy having her around... She is hilarious!!!!
"you can cheat on him" lmao
@@myandroid6116 lmao you sound bitter. Did you get triggered?
@@myandroid6116 that's the best you got? Wow.
@@myandroid6116 wouldn't cry at all, probably would laugh, it's her delivery of the joke that makes it funny
Thats not funny. People commit suicide over that. It would be awful
@@myandroid6116 yikes that's a melty...
Nikki Glaser needs her own show! Absolute genius. I love the 'lag' in her comedy- just as you're hooked and fried on her 1st joke, she's well into her 2nd and 3rd. Great work Nikki!
she hosts the new show fboy island !!
I'm pretty sure she also had a reality show following her and her family...Nikki glaser needs a date.. Or something
This convo feels like something you will hear in gta radios
lol vice city... the luv doctor
She's great! I love her sense of humor.
Looking at how uncomfortable Andy and Conan are makes this all the more funnier. 🤭
Yea because she's coked out and babbling about being afraid of penis. Lol!
It's not them, it's the fact if she says anything which can ruin the interview.
I think it's one half playing the situation for laughs and one half realizing she has them on a runaway train and they can't get off that ride till it's over, or as Patton Oswald's friend said "I wanna see where this goes"
@@Squeezeboxing23 I like your analogy of this. It's not the thrill of the train wreck, but that of the ride.
This is the strangest freaking conversation
No
Yeah
Im high but this sounded like a weird convo
Great sense of humor she has 👍
The new set looks great!
What I love about every time she comes on Conan is how much she admires him, she constantly checks his reaction every once in a while.
Conan's reactions are priceless. They range from being embarrassed to being stern about her graphic jokes. it's like she is Conan's naughty daughter. And Nikki is very good at checking his reaction to her jokes.
"Hastily packed suitcase"
Conan internally: I have a deflated balloon
She has just so brilliant. Top-notch comedian
The world needs women like these
A woman that thinks about a man's feelings in advance? The award may not yet exist but she should be the first recipient.
Don Hensley she would give him a week...then go after a 10 incher.
@@JBthree24 - You might be surprised... I double-dated with a good friend many times right after highschool (early 70s) and there were a lot of nights that ended early when I heard from the front seat, "You're *NOT* sticking that _Son Of a B-tch In Me_ !!!"
I feel blessed to have been born well within what is considered average and also a genuine appreciation of what was pleasureable to my partner, at the time. I have been married for many years and much of what I read both saddens and mystifies me. What are the chances of a fulfilling relationship in a society that considers "Starter Marriages"a normal? What about the kids that have to try to make sense of Life with such selfish & juvenile parents (& a court system that heaps even more abuse on them)?
Yes, your original premise will be true in some (maybe many) cases, but hopefully with experience comes wisdom. Can you truthfully say you never hurt a special "average" girl only to be dumped later by a "Hottie?"
@@HensleyDon no women don't want small pp
Yeah, she sucks dudes for "practice" and thinks guys hold hands with girls cause it's their way of securing bj. She said it herself. I dunno man she's broken
But, she's only thought about them for telling that long-winded joke.
This girl has 'funny bones' as they say.Even her voice cracks me up.
Hands down the best woman comedic I've ever heard.
Nikki really does have it... She feels so natural when she talks, jokes or no jokes...
She is interesting and funny to listen to..
I really hope to see one of her shows someday when she is around
How the hell did I not know about this girl all these years? She is funny as hell, all these bad news about coronavirus had me feeling down and now I feel great.
She's in a lot of the comedy central roasts, that's how I found out about her
She was recently on Joe Rogan
And she has a show on Sirius XM, I think it’s o my Comedy Central radio channel 95 in the morning on weekdays