Once i got real with my narc mom and told her why she upsets me. She nearly lost her mind and i thought she would grab a knife and hit me. The energy was scary. Never again im talking things trough with narcs and enablers. Quietly went away with no contact. They are scary people.
I tried that during the years that I had contact. She would just twist things, claiming that she's been a victim. She should have been a lawyer. She's such a lying sack of bleep!
I feel that way about my father, particularly. He does not know the truth. Cannot do reality. Until recently I've been working through to the Truth that my mother isn't even a GOOD ENOUGH PARENT. She is no more SAFE than my father. She's just a different style...😢
Anyone else experience not realizing a mom is a narcissist, until you moved out? When I moved out and started dating my husband (my then boyfriend) my mom would literally harass me everyday about breaking up with him. She even went as far as breaking into my apartment and doing witchcraft in my apartment so I would leave my husband. It got to a point where I kept my relationship a secret from my parents for a year because I was tired of listening to her insanity. It even got as far as my dad stalking me because she convinced my dad and a friend of theirs to help them do so. I no longer speak to my parents, I couldn’t live like that anymore.
It is so painful to get over. All the hurt and emotional damage my family has done to me is significant. My health has taken a toll. I try not to rhink about them, but I'm reminded all the time. I fear I will never heal all the way. It was just too much and for too long.
Keep focusing on what you want, what you like in this world. Even if it's just a kernel of something that you love outside of the family drama, focus on it and make it grow. You can discover who you are. I know it's painful and hard but you can do it. Start small and build. Your mind will expand despite the abuse if you keep at it.
I walked away from my mother a year and a half ago. It's been the very best decision I ever made. I live with my sister right now. She was on the phone. I have PTSD. The fear I felt worrying that my sister would want me to talk to her was a visceral reaction. Oh she tried to get Julie to make me talk to her and trying to get info about me, but my sister stopped her dead in her tracks. I now have a voice. Thank you for the validation! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
I listened to this one changing “mother” to “father”. Thank you for this. My dad came to my home and verbally attacked me then when he realized I had stopped talking to him, he told my sisters I told him to F off twice when I did not. I was told by my sister I needed to apologize as my dad was so so hurt and too scared to reach out to me because I would hurt him. It’s a joke. My family of origin is a toxic mess. I don’t speak to the remaining 3 family members anymore. I am finally living and really learning who I am as a person, mother, wife, and friend.
After I went no contact, my mother had the audacity to send me a text accusing me of ABUSING her & my dad, with "horrific texts full of lies," then says "don't bother answering you're blocked." She called me "mentally ill." As if a lifetime of gaslighting was not enough. To label me a liar & block communication ... it was all I could do to contain myself. I am honest, I DO NOT LIE! She knew this would kill me, especially by not giving me a chance to respond & make her prove her accusation. Was the final straw I needed to know my cross country move to get away from these messed up people. Shared blood means nothing. These people are so desperate in their attempts to keep their sh*t together, they'll say/do anything. We are the cycle breakers. We are grateful for the opportunity to grow and ascend. I truly believe we chose this challenge for ourselves before birth. Learn from, and lean into the lesson. Namaste
Once after a verbal fight with my narc ma, she accidentally fell later and got a big bruise on her leg, she later send the photo of it and blames me for it. Unbelievable 💀
It is my experience that when they figure out you have them figured out, they’ll call us “liars” because we don’t buy into their delusion, the lie that they are the projected image instead of the reality that they are miserable, cruel and abusive. I feel your pain and frustration with this. I was ganged up on by my narc mother and enabler father for trying to tell a teacher about the abuse at age 7. For several hours a day for several days afterwards they sat me at the kitchen table and drilled into me what a “liar” I was. It was traumatic. I knew afterwards that I would have to endure, bide my time and keep my head down until age 18. I knew I could still think what I wanted, but had to keep my mouth shut to keep tenuous peace. That’s a terrible realization for a child that age to have, that your parents don’t just not love you, but have actively positioned themselves as your enemy through no real fault of your own.
I received a long thesis like text from a nac family member with pages and pages of mess included, trying to bait me into her drama. After reading 2-3 lines, I stopped reading. I didn't respond to any means of communication from her until I felt strong enough. The old me is GONE replaced with a stronger, happier, and more self confident me.
I'm going through it right now 1:45 pm Thursday 12 sep.. my mum said my brother that died didn't love me a few months ago, my enabler father came downstairs because that's where I'm staying till I can get out of here, he said why are you going on about my mother saying those words , just forget about it.. I said did u hear urself, are u crazy I will never forgive those words from my narcissistic mother. And ur comment sounds exactly what iv been through....i feel im having like im going to faint..I'm shaking so bad, but I came on here to ask for help, and I found ur msg...thx
I knew there was something off when I was in high school, but didn't have the terminology (emotional exploitation, scapegoating, smear etc.) nor was I aware of the traits. I don't believe you confront any covert narcissist. Don't try to reason with unreasonable persons. Don't try to reason with people who are delusional about who they are. Don't try to reason with bullies. When someone is empathy-impaired, I doubt that can be altered. She has no idea who she is or what she had done, or the consequences for her destiny, if unrepentant. I have seen her objectively for decades, and have limited my exposure to her, in spite of her overstepping her place, but it is still painful to acknowledge that a mother has been jealous of her own daughter to the point of trying to ruin her. She partnered with my ex in doing something so sick, I can barely articulate it. They turned out to be of the exact same ilk. He also has narcissistic family members, but chose the other option, in the face of narcissistic abusers.
You're doing invaluable work Lisa. It made me feel angry, sad and validated to listen to your video today. When I began to make that separation from my mother at 30 years old, that is exactly how it went. It was terrifying but I'm so glad I did it.
Before I knew what the underlying issue was, they seemed so unpredictable but once you know the twisted logic behind what they do, it becomes pretty predictable. It's a pattern, it's real and if you're the target of it, the best you can do for yourself is walk away and recover your own identity. They don't stop.
Thank you so very much for this validating video. All has happened to me being the only daughter of a covert narcissistic mother. I was the scapegoat all my life and nurse. As I went no contact 6 yrs ago. So much damage has been done already. She did everything (Smear campaign, lies, divided my children etc....this time nothing worked. I was done!!! I'm still here. Im healing and dealing with life after 5 plus decades. Im finally learning to love myself more and sharing my life lessons with my grandchildren. Hopefully, they will understand that they don't have to be abused and are worthy of love.
Yes Yes YES!! GO you Cycle Breaker, You!!👍 58 here and madly baking up for lost time not KNOWING. And I was a therapist and my parents were both SPECIAL NEEDS TEACHERS!! Not a CLUE till 55..
My mother used to be co-dependent, but since her husband has died, she seems to have become a narcissist herself. It is confusing, and I don't see her as a victim anymore. She tried to make me a golden child, but I refused. Now she went no contact.
After I went no contact 6 years ago, my mother started with the "my kids would never forgive me" for whatever crap she thought I was doing wrong. I blocked her on everything. She tried calling on a phone number I did not recognize, still does, but I screen all calls that don't come up on caller ID. Even though she lives 200 miles away and has absolutely no reason whatsoever to come to my home, she still does a few times per year. at first, I got extreme anxiety when I heard the doorbell and wasn't expecting anyone, I'd hide, pretend I was not home. After 6 years, I have gotten over it. I have a doorbell cam and can see who it is. My kitchen window is near the front door, and I have no problem sitting in complete visibility doing my thing, I'll wave to her with my favorite finger and go about my day, and never answer the door no matter how many times she rings or bangs on the door. last time she showed up, I did let my father know (who was with her) that I can and will get a restraining order on her if she continues. I JUST DON"T CARE ANYMORE.
I went no contact after 50 some years of trying hard to make something impossible work. When I did that, after years of being the unofficial scapegoat, I was upgraded to public enemy number one. Your video is spot on. They can have that ridiculousness if they want it. I consult myself now. I know where I've been and don't intend to ever return to what was, for me, a viper's nest.
Thank you thank you thank you as usual for making me feel seen... The attacks have definitely intensified... I have the whole picture now and you just confirmed it. Thank you again, Lisa❤
Crazy making! All true. So hard growing up in this environment! I'm so happy to jump into healing and reverse the programming. Your classes really empower and training 😍codependents how to come home to themselves. 🙏❤️
I just finally got the diagnosis of PTSD this week at age 49. I'm a narcissistic abuse survivor of my mother and ex-husband. They are so very alike. I wish i would've seen it 20 yrs ago. Thank you Lisa! You are an angel 😇 ❤
I'd like to know WHY so many of us have these kinds of mothers. I always thought it was just mine, but it is seemingly a very high percentage of us. After no contact for a couple of years I returned to her life only to be further devastated by her cruelty and obnoxious actions. I have had zero contact since February of 2023 and I will NEVER see her again in this lifetime. In fact, when I hear that she has passed on I will CELEBRATE the fact that it is finally over! Thank you for your guidance and understanding. Knowing that I am not the only one with a horrible mother is very comforting (although it makes me quite sad for all of us who have carried this burden and pain.) 💜
Thank you again, these sessions have helped me to understand what has really happened. It never ends even with no contact I am sought after but continue shun all attempts of contact, I'm being stalked as was the relationship I had with a partner, same behaviors between both people in which at the time I thought it was normal being that's all I knew from birth. I feel as if I was robbed of my life all those years.
I often feel robbed of my INHERITANCES, too. My narc parents are/WERE just so BLAH- they did NOTHING GOOD. but think they are PERFECT... My antidote is to remember they never will feel good. I can choose to ANYTIME!! We can LOVE. THEY CAN'T❤
Lady, you are so knowledgeable on this subject. Everything you're saying is point on. Once you do understand what you're dealing with, it frees you to make informed choices. This reality requires you to pull from all you inner strength. And there's no turning back. It's painful at first, but then it becomes validating. I tried minimal contact, but then had to go no contact. It's such a shame that these people carry on their lives so consumed with their own egos. But you cant change them. You just have to go on with your own life. Consider it your own personal freedom. Its ok. ❤❤❤
I feel actually blessed now I realise I was always the scapegoat because my golden balls brother hasn't the respect independence or even free will that I appreciate in my adult realisation of the weird situation
I recently went thru this, again, w my mom. We are once again not speaking. The guilt is unbearable. My parents are in their 80s…just want peace. I hope all your hearts find healing ❤️🩹 🕊️
When I went no contact recenrly my mom accused me of being selfish and egotistical which is so funny because I was parentified and did so much and became completely selfless and codependent and she is definitely narcissistic. I laughed so hard because she projects her own character traits onto others. I also saw that in other narcissistic people. They accuse you of lying or being selfish because thez are. You could be the most honest and selfless person and they would still accuse you because they tell on themselves. Once I realised that I stopped defending myself and stopped trying to make them see reality because I realised they simply aren't capable of being a tiny bit self reflective or see things as they really are. I wish all those who suffered from narc parents, siblings or partners that they can heal 💫 remember it wasn't your fault and nobody has the right to abuse or belittle you! Stand up for yourself and ideally if possible go no contact and never look back.
Oh my gosh, how horrible! My sons are 16 & 20, & I've worried about that. But I think my bond with them is strong enough to withstand her, hopefully. My 16 yr rarely sees her and the 20 yr old stops in to see my dad lol, but unfortunately, she's ALWAYS there. Her life exists of controlling his. And used to include my life, but no more. It's almost like I divorced her around the same time I kicked my ex-husband out. It was like a bright bulb popped in my head!
My mother lies to my father about me she's been doing it for a long time it's silly things like I told her to try and use an air fryer to stay healthy and she goes to my father and tells him that I've been saying bad stuff and upset her, and all I was doing was talking about an air fryer , so he has the wrong story and thinks that I've been making her angry and he comes and gets angry with me. And I didn't know she's been doing that all my life but I caught her in the act of doing it one time and now I know she's done it a long time. She's always acted like the victim. I lived abroad for 15 years or more and it never clicked but being here now with them I thank God that I wasn't here those 15 years but it sure hurts to know that they've been like that and I didn't put two and two together.
My mother barked "I'm not scared of you". Years later after that my narc sister nvited me to our mother's birthday. I have nothing to do with family. One day my son will realize why
Hey! We are GROWN UPS now, and we don't have to take the nonsense, we really really don't. Call them on their behavior and never personally attack, watch them unravel. Make sure you keep as much of the conversation recorded as possible, aka text. That way you can communicate what is really going on to others. 🤗 But you do not have to keep doing their game
Been no contact with my birth giver for 8 years. She is dead to me as I am dead to her. I'm free. I carved my own path and have lived a wild and interesting life in my 35 years. My parents don't even know what state I live in lol. My golden child sister lives on the same property as my parents right under their thumb. She has to perform perfection until ...our mother bites the dust.
Is that kind of dynamic source only from our biological mother at the time while she is young and beautiful is not that easy to discern when the father in a home is being forced by economic hardship in the home to be working far away from home for most of the week. A clear sign a biological mother is narcissistic is when their behavior pattern involves any form of harsh punishmment of their children. That could mean their physical punishment methods or instead their severe verbal abuse of their children instead while she is often demanding that the father when they are in the home be doing his share of the disciplining of small children which of course would be greeted with only a smile when that is physical abuse of the children in a kind of unhealthy ritual which is still called child abuse.
Once i got real with my narc mom and told her why she upsets me. She nearly lost her mind and i thought she would grab a knife and hit me. The energy was scary.
Never again im talking things trough with narcs and enablers.
Quietly went away with no contact. They are scary people.
My stepmom actually pushed me physically--dhe did this twice, both times when I was an adult! I was shocked.😮
I tried that during the years that I had contact. She would just twist things, claiming that she's been a victim. She should have been a lawyer. She's such a lying sack of bleep!
@eviltwinnancy4561 I feel that way about my exx-father. A piece of 💩. It is So SAD. But they are SOOOO evil..
I feel that way about my father, particularly. He does not know the truth. Cannot do reality.
Until recently I've been working through to the Truth that my mother isn't even a GOOD ENOUGH PARENT. She is no more SAFE than my father. She's just a different style...😢
They will do anything to not be held accountable. Anything.
Thank you for all your help, I took a job far away from the narc and leave tomorrow. I can't explain the cruelty that was dished out.
Congratulations! Don't look back. 🎉❤
@@kirstinalphabet796 Thank you so much for the support.
@@jshelley4592 Girl, I've lived it. ❤ Make sure you focus on YOUR growth. Onward & upward, my Friend.
Yeah! YOU don't have to explain here😊. We gotcha n r with you❤❤❤
@@sunnyadams5842 THANK YOU SO MUCH
Anyone else experience not realizing a mom is a narcissist, until you moved out? When I moved out and started dating my husband (my then boyfriend) my mom would literally harass me everyday about breaking up with him. She even went as far as breaking into my apartment and doing witchcraft in my apartment so I would leave my husband. It got to a point where I kept my relationship a secret from my parents for a year because I was tired of listening to her insanity. It even got as far as my dad stalking me because she convinced my dad and a friend of theirs to help them do so. I no longer speak to my parents, I couldn’t live like that anymore.
AND The fish asked WHAT'S WATER??
@@sunnyadams5842 I don’t understand what you mean by that
Yep! I didn't realize how she was treating me until I was in my late 30s!
Wow !!! Finding a husband is the ultimately independence. They will do anything to stop that.
It is so painful to get over. All the hurt and emotional damage my family has done to me is significant. My health has taken a toll. I try not to rhink about them, but I'm reminded all the time. I fear I will never heal all the way. It was just too much and for too long.
U will be ok...be strong dear
Keep focusing on what you want, what you like in this world. Even if it's just a kernel of something that you love outside of the family drama, focus on it and make it grow. You can discover who you are. I know it's painful and hard but you can do it. Start small and build. Your mind will expand despite the abuse if you keep at it.
It will take time for you to heal. Please find a trauma informed therapist to help guide you.
What happens is it’s a wrap! She knows you know who she is and therefore she can’t control you anymore and has not further use for you. It’s a wrap!
I walked away from my mother a year and a half ago. It's been the very best decision I ever made. I live with my sister right now. She was on the phone. I have PTSD. The fear I felt worrying that my sister would want me to talk to her was a visceral reaction. Oh she tried to get Julie to make me talk to her and trying to get info about me, but my sister stopped her dead in her tracks. I now have a voice. Thank you for the validation! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
Please get your own place. As much as you love your sister, trust me, go and get your own place ASAP !
I listened to this one changing “mother” to “father”. Thank you for this. My dad came to my home and verbally attacked me then when he realized I had stopped talking to him, he told my sisters I told him to F off twice when I did not. I was told by my sister I needed to apologize as my dad was so so hurt and too scared to reach out to me because I would hurt him. It’s a joke. My family of origin is a toxic mess. I don’t speak to the remaining 3 family members anymore. I am finally living and really learning who I am as a person, mother, wife, and friend.
After I went no contact, my mother had the audacity to send me a text accusing me of ABUSING her & my dad, with "horrific texts full of lies," then says "don't bother answering you're blocked."
She called me "mentally ill."
As if a lifetime of gaslighting was not enough.
To label me a liar & block communication ... it was all I could do to contain myself.
I am honest, I DO NOT LIE!
She knew this would kill me, especially by not giving me a chance to respond & make her prove her accusation.
Was the final straw I needed to know my cross country move to get away from these messed up people.
Shared blood means nothing.
These people are so desperate in their attempts to keep their sh*t together, they'll say/do anything.
We are the cycle breakers.
We are grateful for the opportunity to grow and ascend.
I truly believe we chose this challenge for ourselves before birth.
Learn from, and lean into the lesson.
Namaste
Once after a verbal fight with my narc ma, she accidentally fell later and got a big bruise on her leg, she later send the photo of it and blames me for it. Unbelievable 💀
It is my experience that when they figure out you have them figured out, they’ll call us “liars” because we don’t buy into their delusion, the lie that they are the projected image instead of the reality that they are miserable, cruel and abusive. I feel your pain and frustration with this. I was ganged up on by my narc mother and enabler father for trying to tell a teacher about the abuse at age 7. For several hours a day for several days afterwards they sat me at the kitchen table and drilled into me what a “liar” I was. It was traumatic. I knew afterwards that I would have to endure, bide my time and keep my head down until age 18. I knew I could still think what I wanted, but had to keep my mouth shut to keep tenuous peace. That’s a terrible realization for a child that age to have, that your parents don’t just not love you, but have actively positioned themselves as your enemy through no real fault of your own.
I received a long thesis like text from a nac family member with pages and pages of mess included, trying to bait me into her drama. After reading 2-3 lines, I stopped reading. I didn't respond to any means of communication from her until I felt strong enough. The old me is GONE replaced with a stronger, happier, and more self confident me.
@@user-yn7ot8hx3cNice Boundary Keeping. ❤I'm working on it, too.
I'm going through it right now 1:45 pm Thursday 12 sep.. my mum said my brother that died didn't love me a few months ago, my enabler father came downstairs because that's where I'm staying till I can get out of here, he said why are you going on about my mother saying those words , just forget about it.. I said did u hear urself, are u crazy I will never forgive those words from my narcissistic mother. And ur comment sounds exactly what iv been through....i feel im having like im going to faint..I'm shaking so bad, but I came on here to ask for help, and I found ur msg...thx
I knew there was something off when I was in high school, but didn't have the terminology (emotional exploitation, scapegoating, smear etc.) nor was I aware of the traits. I don't believe you confront any covert narcissist. Don't try to reason with unreasonable persons. Don't try to reason with people who are delusional about who they are. Don't try to reason with bullies. When someone is empathy-impaired, I doubt that can be altered. She has no idea who she is or what she had done, or the consequences for her destiny, if unrepentant. I have seen her objectively for decades, and have limited my exposure to her, in spite of her overstepping her place, but it is still painful to acknowledge that a mother has been jealous of her own daughter to the point of trying to ruin her. She partnered with my ex in doing something so sick, I can barely articulate it. They turned out to be of the exact same ilk. He also has narcissistic family members, but chose the other option, in the face of narcissistic abusers.
OMG, I had the same in life; no contact with family of origin. Life is cool. ❤
You're doing invaluable work Lisa. It made me feel angry, sad and validated to listen to your video today. When I began to make that separation from my mother at 30 years old, that is exactly how it went. It was terrifying but I'm so glad I did it.
Before I knew what the underlying issue was, they seemed so unpredictable but once you know the twisted logic behind what they do, it becomes pretty predictable. It's a pattern, it's real and if you're the target of it, the best you can do for yourself is walk away and recover your own identity. They don't stop.
Thank you so very much for this validating video.
All has happened to me being the only daughter of a covert narcissistic mother. I was the scapegoat all my life and nurse. As I went no contact 6 yrs ago. So much damage has been done already. She did everything (Smear campaign, lies, divided my children etc....this time nothing worked. I was done!!! I'm still here. Im healing and dealing with life after 5 plus decades. Im finally learning to love myself more and sharing my life lessons with my grandchildren. Hopefully, they will understand that they don't have to be abused and are worthy of love.
Yes Yes YES!! GO you Cycle Breaker, You!!👍 58 here and madly baking up for lost time not KNOWING. And I was a therapist and my parents were both SPECIAL NEEDS TEACHERS!! Not a CLUE till 55..
@@sunnyadams5842 I didn't start researching until I was 54 myself. Bless you💞
My mother used to be co-dependent, but since her husband has died, she seems to have become a narcissist herself. It is confusing, and I don't see her as a victim anymore. She tried to make me a golden child, but I refused. Now she went no contact.
I never knew! I knew something was always wrong but I did not KNOW! Everything you say is EXACTLY mine and my sisters life!
It’s so painful 😢
After I went no contact 6 years ago, my mother started with the "my kids would never forgive me" for whatever crap she thought I was doing wrong. I blocked her on everything. She tried calling on a phone number I did not recognize, still does, but I screen all calls that don't come up on caller ID. Even though she lives 200 miles away and has absolutely no reason whatsoever to come to my home, she still does a few times per year. at first, I got extreme anxiety when I heard the doorbell and wasn't expecting anyone, I'd hide, pretend I was not home. After 6 years, I have gotten over it. I have a doorbell cam and can see who it is. My kitchen window is near the front door, and I have no problem sitting in complete visibility doing my thing, I'll wave to her with my favorite finger and go about my day, and never answer the door no matter how many times she rings or bangs on the door. last time she showed up, I did let my father know (who was with her) that I can and will get a restraining order on her if she continues. I JUST DON"T CARE ANYMORE.
Viewing my whole family as drama addicts has helped a lot.
I went no contact after 50 some years of trying hard to make something impossible work. When I did that, after years of being the unofficial scapegoat, I was upgraded to public enemy number one. Your video is spot on. They can have that ridiculousness if they want it. I consult myself now. I know where I've been and don't intend to ever return to what was, for me, a viper's nest.
So painful when you finally put the puzzle pieces together 😢😟🙏🏽
Yes..but so revealing. But it speaks to your truth. Keep rising above the pain. Acknowledge it and start the healing process. ❤
I'm suing her she pushed me too much.
Thank you thank you thank you as usual for making me feel seen... The attacks have definitely intensified... I have the whole picture now and you just confirmed it. Thank you again, Lisa❤
All so true. Thank you❤
Crazy making! All true. So hard growing up in this environment! I'm so happy to jump into healing and reverse the programming. Your classes really empower and training 😍codependents how to come home to themselves. 🙏❤️
Wow the first and last sign are exactly what is currently happening to me by my narc mother. Thank you for your wisdom, it helps. Blessings xo
I just finally got the diagnosis of PTSD this week at age 49. I'm a narcissistic abuse survivor of my mother and ex-husband. They are so very alike. I wish i would've seen it 20 yrs ago. Thank you Lisa! You are an angel 😇 ❤
I'd like to know WHY so many of us have these kinds of mothers. I always thought it was just mine, but it is seemingly a very high percentage of us. After no contact for a couple of years I returned to her life only to be further devastated by her cruelty and obnoxious actions. I have had zero contact since February of 2023 and I will NEVER see her again in this lifetime. In fact, when I hear that she has passed on I will CELEBRATE the fact that it is finally over!
Thank you for your guidance and understanding. Knowing that I am not the only one with a horrible mother is very comforting (although it makes me quite sad for all of us who have carried this burden and pain.) 💜
I was wondering the same! Because there are so many survivors💪🏼 of narc mom’s, it must be a generational thing?
Thank you again, these sessions have helped me to understand what has really happened. It never ends even with no contact I am sought after but continue shun all attempts of contact, I'm being stalked as was the relationship I had with a partner, same behaviors between both people in which at the time I thought it was normal being that's all I knew from birth. I feel as if I was robbed of my life all those years.
I often feel robbed of my INHERITANCES, too. My narc parents are/WERE just so BLAH- they did NOTHING GOOD. but think they are PERFECT... My antidote is to remember they never will feel good. I can choose to ANYTIME!! We can LOVE. THEY CAN'T❤
Same 😢
Thank you. I found you in 2018..
You have been so integral in the years since. May God bless you for assisting so many of us 🙏👍🌟
Lady, you are so knowledgeable on this subject. Everything you're saying is point on. Once you do understand what you're dealing with, it frees you to make informed choices. This reality requires you to pull from all you inner strength. And there's no turning back. It's painful at first, but then it becomes validating. I tried minimal contact, but then had to go no contact. It's such a shame that these people carry on their lives so consumed with their own egos. But you cant change them. You just have to go on with your own life. Consider it your own personal freedom. Its ok. ❤❤❤
I feel actually blessed now I realise I was always the scapegoat because my golden balls brother hasn't the respect independence or even free will that I appreciate in my adult realisation of the weird situation
I recently went thru this, again, w my mom. We are once again not speaking. The guilt is unbearable. My parents are in their 80s…just want peace. I hope all your hearts find healing ❤️🩹 🕊️
You’re not alone..it’s crazy 😢🙏🏽.
🎯❤💚🥰💙thank you
Lisa my ex is married to his mother. I felt like the 3rd wheel. Exiting slowly but surely. Thank you ❤
Thanks for the encouragement to stay strong
Brilliant work
👍THANK YOU for your insights and sharing your wisdom 💙💜 - when I need it the most.
When I went no contact recenrly my mom accused me of being selfish and egotistical which is so funny because I was parentified and did so much and became completely selfless and codependent and she is definitely narcissistic. I laughed so hard because she projects her own character traits onto others. I also saw that in other narcissistic people. They accuse you of lying or being selfish because thez are. You could be the most honest and selfless person and they would still accuse you because they tell on themselves. Once I realised that I stopped defending myself and stopped trying to make them see reality because I realised they simply aren't capable of being a tiny bit self reflective or see things as they really are. I wish all those who suffered from narc parents, siblings or partners that they can heal 💫 remember it wasn't your fault and nobody has the right to abuse or belittle you! Stand up for yourself and ideally if possible go no contact and never look back.
Thank you ❤
i love that this was uploaded on my narc mom’s bday. impeccable timing!🤍
Oh how lovely!! Congrats on baking it this far with a narc mommy. Hope you got her something nice(ly wretched lol)
😅 that's great. ✨️
My mother doubled down on denial that her treatment of me was bad and then turned her back on me. Is this scenario 3?
Since she doesn't have me anymore but she does have my 21 yo son brainwashed into oblivion. It's severed me and my sons relationship
Oh my gosh, how horrible! My sons are 16 & 20, & I've worried about that. But I think my bond with them is strong enough to withstand her, hopefully. My 16 yr rarely sees her and the 20 yr old stops in to see my dad lol, but unfortunately, she's ALWAYS there. Her life exists of controlling his. And used to include my life, but no more. It's almost like I divorced her around the same time I kicked my ex-husband out. It was like a bright bulb popped in my head!
@exotixzyro9755 I'm happy for u it feels good to heal. The only way is to leave it behind
Same here.
thank you i needed this today, you're an angel
Thanks for your valuable content 🙏💚💚🌹🌹
😢Sad My Mom Is A Narc Also And Harsh DESTRUCTION Is Her Portion If She Doesnt Repent And Get Deliverance!💯💅🏽🤦🏽♀️🙏🏽🔥
My mother lies to my father about me she's been doing it for a long time it's silly things like I told her to try and use an air fryer to stay healthy and she goes to my father and tells him that I've been saying bad stuff and upset her, and all I was doing was talking about an air fryer , so he has the wrong story and thinks that I've been making her angry and he comes and gets angry with me. And I didn't know she's been doing that all my life but I caught her in the act of doing it one time and now I know she's done it a long time. She's always acted like the victim. I lived abroad for 15 years or more and it never clicked but being here now with them I thank God that I wasn't here those 15 years but it sure hurts to know that they've been like that and I didn't put two and two together.
I realy, enourmously whish I had heard, NARCISSISTIC MOTHER aboutb60 years ago. Thank you for all the excellent information.
🎯 exactly what we’re dealing with
Thank you..
thank you that was just perfect timing for my life
My mother barked "I'm not scared of you". Years later after that my narc sister nvited me to our mother's birthday. I have nothing to do with family. One day my son will realize why
Hey! We are GROWN UPS now, and we don't have to take the nonsense, we really really don't. Call them on their behavior and never personally attack, watch them unravel. Make sure you keep as much of the conversation recorded as possible, aka text. That way you can communicate what is really going on to others. 🤗 But you do not have to keep doing their game
Thx
Been no contact with my birth giver for 8 years. She is dead to me as I am dead to her. I'm free. I carved my own path and have lived a wild and interesting life in my 35 years. My parents don't even know what state I live in lol. My golden child sister lives on the same property as my parents right under their thumb. She has to perform perfection until ...our mother bites the dust.
* scapegoat child
I suffered for decades as a scapegoat child. Please acknowledge the men, will you?
Thank you ❤🙏✌️
Golden goat is the term term Used
My mother have no moor control I’m in my healing journey but telling everyone how mean douther and she have no done nothing wrong to me.
I am hoping that i am too old to ever meet and deal with a type of person described here. I wonder if i have ever known a mild narc and not known it.
Ty ❤️
✨✨🙏✨✨
My narc mother stole all my money 25 yrs ago and then started to abuse me financially and stil is She is 97 now and just won't die .
They live forever it seems!
Is that kind of dynamic source only from our biological mother at the time while she is young and beautiful is not that easy to discern when the father in a home is being forced by economic hardship in the home to be working far away from home for most of the week. A clear sign a biological mother is narcissistic is when their behavior pattern involves any form of harsh punishmment of their children. That could mean their physical punishment methods or instead their severe verbal abuse of their children instead while she is often demanding that the father when they are in the home be doing his share of the disciplining of small children which of course would be greeted with only a smile when that is physical abuse of the children in a kind of unhealthy ritual which is still called child abuse.
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❤🌹
It's a terrible legacy, but Lisa and so many others offer knowledge and hope 🙏🥂🩷