Men and women love differently. Feminine love is consumptive: it wants as much of you inside of her as possible. However, when it is actually successful in its objective, it grows disinterested in that which it was once fascinated by. It falls to men to hold the line against this consumption for the good of both parties, which will require them to occasionally disappoint their women. Those who fail to develop this skill will learn to regret it. Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: ruclips.net/video/WrXBzQ2HDEQ/видео.html Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: ruclips.net/channel/UCSduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an episode: oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #women #relationship
Feminine ‘love’ (generally speaking) is ‘consumptive’ as stated, self-serving, drawing all phenomena unto herself…only then can she feel free to ‘love’ in a limited way that suits her wants and needs only. Masculine love (generally speaking) is expansive, all-encompassing, looking outwards, idealistic (in a positive way) transforming, a love that reaches beyond just himself, towards the stars, a love that benefits ALL.
Disappointing women isn't a skill; it's literally effortless. No matter what you do, she will be disappointed. What requires skill is not caring what women want.
A man should be genuine, and strive for what he needs and wants, in trustful and truthful interactions with other persons - he should be open, and see if his and her aims and values align in a relationship. Not use any faking tricks and games. Not assuming this or that. Be manly and dare to talk. Nobody will be as disppointed as the one who was cheated into believing that false was true. If a man wants a one night stand, he should say so. If his aim is a life-long marriage, he should not only show it in words but also in his every act and consideration - it is a demanding, but rewarding goal, but it doesn't come on wishful demand, it has to be a result of daily effort and responsibility. But it is very rewarding to achieve something difficult and valuable. A man can naturally negotiate for something in between, too - most importantly dare to be honest!
Counterpoint: The fastest way to prove a woman has no idea what she wants is to give her what she asks for. (Note of caution, this can also be very expensive)
I think his idea os more that you disappoint her under your control. That she will be more and more disappointed by everything you give her, is a given.
Nobody is an adult until 40s. I should have held out and had a better grasp of reality. I leaned tough lessons that cost more than money- which is worse since money is easy to get, but stress takes life away that time is gone. It's a humongous change to make mid life in 50s but very possible. Better to build your kingdom first, then you'll be far more careful who you let in to your precious space
@@blastermaster7261 Immature women are more likely to offer their bodies to a man easily, that's why they date them. Grown-up women who can think for themselves and want an equal relationship, want to be friends first and protect their femaleness are uninteresting for guys whose first priority is how quickly and how often they can get laid. You want sex, you get nothing but sex. And you pay, with money, time and stress.
This is valid, you're a life savior for young men out there. I've been in a 7 years relationship (not married) and she defines her love to me by the level of amusement she gets and how I adjust my life towards her OWN standard. She left me (monkey-branched to another dude) when she realized she won't be getting any of it anymore, I chose another path. She has also denied me for sex only to regret later on that I don't even touch or kiss her anymore, no matter how sexy she was trying to be. Guys, don't be a simp. Happiness is never about the maximum amount of joys (sex, food, money, etc), rather the absence of suffering!
Always saying no is the best. There are studies out there that narcissistic behavior on the side of the man had zero negative impact on average for a relationship, also the archtype with the highest numbers of women are Dark Triade, basically narcissistic, violent and manipulative men.
And it's not as clear as that even, there's a gradient which includes their instinct to start lies, dating apps 'accidently' get downloaded, they prepare prior to leave. At the expense of manipulating and damaging parts of you in the process
This is pretty spot on…. My (now ex) girlfriend of almost a year came to me and said I’m not affectionate enough and that she wants me to use more words of affirmation, use more emotion when texting, use “I love you” instead of “love you”, etc. I made a serious effort to start doing those things after that conversation. She broke up with me 2 weeks later.
From decades of experience playing the field, to quitting playing music and devoting my life and resources to a single woman's well-being, self-esteem and even her immediate family, I can regretfully say, that this is 100% true. I wish I had seen this video in 2012.
Yep! I wished I have seen this video in 1985. Married 38 years in two successive relationships, I can testifie you will never be good enough for the spouse. Your life will be a daily surrender, a betray of yourself, and you will end hating yourself for this.
If you know that this is GOLD-class advice, then its secret power makes me want to hear from your wife: what makes her so happy about being your partner in life - because I myself can't imagine how come - it sounds impossible. What makes her so happy about you that this advice functions?
No the only advice for this generation is to ensure pregnancy and marriage doesnt occur which will avoid all the issues. For this guys should immediately take his girlfriend to get Tubal Ligation and still buy and give her daily birth control pills after taken in front of you and also Plan B pill after consulting with a doctor each time after intercourse.
@@rejectionistmanifesto8836 Better he gets himself a vasectomy, it is easier, safer and cheaper. A one time effort. 😀 But use condoms anyway, not to catch STD!!! (Mind you, condoms are totally within a man's control. In some countries you get them for free.)
This video should be watched by every single man wanting to be in a relationship. This is an extremely important video. It should be watched 10 times by every guy!
I agree, had I been taught this type of content in high school my life would have been changed for the better. I am a good guy but I made huge Blue Pill mistakes like marrying @ age 19.
Dude. I love the world we have today. This is the reason they are professionals. They learn and know what took you years to learn. For a young person, you are fortunate this information is just laying out here for you. As a man, you have to maintain a level of detachment no matter how your woman wants everything- your time, your thoughts. You run the program and must stick to the plan.
@@CastleRaccon I see it as complaining about life when they are with women, but subtly revealing how obsessed they are with getting with a woman just by being here and moaning incessantly about it.
Forget about simping, the fact that he said that disappointing is a spice of a relationship 😅 what ???????!!!!! 😂 This is pure nonsense. Is not even logical. I know that women are different psicologicaly speaking, but, the fact that a so called psicologist could encourage disappointment is a new one for me.
@@mauriciolopez1235 Most nice guys are people pleasers. When it comes to a woman they worship her and just cannot say no to anything she wants no matter how unreasonable.Try that and see how it works out.
I was married for 28 years and ended it last September. I was in a constant state of capitulating to her. I was actually fearful of disappointing her. Well, I was miserable for the majority of the relationship but it had quickly become my normal state of being. I did not know any better. If I had known the truth of this episode, my reality would have been different. But, now it is and I am loving life and who I am. Thank you, Orion. Life changing. Young men, listen and believe this.
Yes! Young men Listen up very carefully. Do no ignore red flags that are waved right in your face. I did that for 20yrs....It got me nothing but heartaches, anxiety , sadness and an empty bank account. Eyes but especially EARS wide open
Seeing comments like yours on this channel makes me feel better that I got out of mine in 9 years. It started off well, ups and downs but then was maintained by me capitulating to her ever taller demands of me and her not understanding that I need to sacrifice going out on dates for my career. Every time I'd not go out with her and prioritise work, she would start emotion dumping about how she's feeling alone and caged and this and that. I'd tell her that if she wants to keep going out late at nights with her friends drinking, then me and her aren't going to work out. So she would use that to manipulate me, whether she realised it or not, to at least have me go out with her. Like, relax woman. Going out only a couple times a month until I get my finances up was too much for her. "At least once a week". And I live in a small city with nothing to do but visit the same odd cafes, bars, theatres, I don't know what the hell she got out of it. I was fine watching netflix with her while screensharing. We couldn't live together cause she lived with her parents.
Precisely. So many men think indifference is the key to keeping a woman. No. Indifference is indifference. It's not caring whether she stays or leaves.
@@IkesPimpHand Its not about not caring. We are humans, of course we care if our loved one leaves. What takes strength and character is standing on your principles and doing the right thing even if she might leave.
So true. I quit on women entirely a decade ago and it was like I flipped on a light switch and was suddenly visible to them. Same guy, same values, I just stopped thinking about my life relative to them and suddenly I was desirable even to strangers since I now give off a completely different vibe.
If the key is indifference then why be in a relationship in the first place? What kind of relationship are you trying to build if you’re numb to how you disappoint them? Generally speaking, a person who lacks conviction for disappointing people are also less likely to hold themselves accountable.
I find the idea of always stressing out and thinking of keeping someone very exhausting. Focus on yourself first.. know your limitations and boundaries so when you get involved with someone.. you get there from a place of joy and love.. not attachment and overthinking to keep the person.. you offer yourself for the buyers.. if the buyer is no longer interested.. it’s not personal.. you enjoyed their company already.. and that’s a win.. now you move on lightly and keep doing your thing which is focusing on being your authentic self under all circumstances.
So on point when it comes to female nature. This should be dating 101 for every man. So many of us get our programming from Disney movies and it's not helpful at all.
and remember programming by (grnd.) mthr.s from earliest on. not necessarily deserving per-default-(!!)-halo, to be sincere. merely xx.s in any inherent aspect, too.
You should probably get out there and look for modest personalities in other women. What the guy describes is like if they only have one type of woman out there lol.
For a certain period yes. After that period you should reevaluate, once the the hurt heals a bit. If it was a good relationship, and you still want it, then start talking again.
@@swim3530 only, and I mean, ONLY if they initiate contact first. Otherwise they are dead. You can never contact them again. Otherwise, you're coming to the table with a weaker hand, and open yourself to be taken advantage of.
disagree. I think either person can initiate contact esp. if it was a mutual breakup, grew apart. The problem is most fems get really bitter if you breakup with them, and rejected them. They cant get over it! Meanwhile guys get rejected all the time! Fragile egos for being so "strong and independent"!? 😆
I think that limiting oneself from following the heart is itself a weakness, so there is just a choice between two lower status. However in my perspective both reaching out and not are not considered negative.
Jesus. 33M married 5 years. Did NOT expect this to ring so true. It may not be PC by today’s standards, but he 100% understands human nature. He’s right on all points. Wow.
this is a great explanation for a problem my friend has: all his girlfriends end up liking him as a friend and they eventually break up without any passion or emotion or need for each other. it fizzles out completely. because he's extremely conflict avoidant and he boasts he never, ever fights with his girlfriends on anything, including very petty tiny arguments. But that's actually the problem. He becomes a butler that's rent-free.
I think u need to have downs to remember the ups. Women are emotional beings, they Need to feel a range of emotion, not picture perfect love on a pedestal
Mmm not really. I would argue that its generally typical human social behavior. In my opinion a healthy individual (male or female) will establish boundaries in all of their relationships, be personal, family, friendship or work related. Its just part of being in a community. Dealing with woman is no different in my opinion. And to be fair to women, men have a degree of that same attribute. It's just not as prominent I don't think.
@@TheMonkeygruntIt’s one thing to have boundaries, and it's another thing to have boundaries you have to constantly enforce. Women want as if they're entitled to your being simply from having the title of girlfriend whereas your friends behave completely differently. My friends can fuction if I don't see them for a month. My girl on the otherhand...that wpuld be an issue. He's right, the neediness makes you question if a relationship is even worth it. To be fair, family does have entitlement too but it doesn't threaten to strip your autonomy to the degree of a woman's love. A woman's love gradually just heads in the direction of codepedence: she wants you to be her best friend, she wants to move in with you, she wants to sleep in the same bed, she wants you to commit to her emotionally and physically, ahe wants you to marry her, she wants to watch shows together, she wants to hangout together on the weekends, she wants your last name, she wants to be a part of your family...friendships aren't like this at all. That's why I think friendships are the healthiest relationship, because it's completely voluntary at every step of the way ( you don't have to pledge your commitment to your friends), and there's no entitlement because of it. I don't know the shit is annoying. I literally work with my girlfriend and I feel like I have to explain to her every week why it's ok for me to want space from her, and my days off to myself, as if I didn't spend a majority of my work day interacting with her lol. With my friends I don't have to explain shit. I just say I'm bysy, but I'll chill with you later and the world keeps spinning. It does seem like more effort than it's worth at times.
the channel title says it upfront - he is a hack. he is not a real psychologist, it's like Elizabeth Holmes if psychology channels. But since youtube is popular among cluster B disordered people and occasionally codependents who need the cult leader, he get the views. Same with teal swan - she get millions of views despite misleading info. None of them are qualified or actually knowledgeable.
I'm a 7th degree black belt in disappointing women. Curiously, I never even had to train to get this skill. Other men have tried to best me in this endeavor, but few have ever come close.
I just got out of a relationship where I kept folding to her demands and it was never enough, i was always critcized and told I could do better. 8 months of this push anr pull relationship, i was miserable, but it was a trauma bond. I finally ended it this week. Im ready to get back to who I was and this advice is gold, set your boundaries early and if its enough to let them walk, then let them. This video came at a perfect time for me... God bless you all and hope you prosper!
That trauma bond 100% comes from dealing with a jezebel spirit, it’s like for some reason you find it soo hard to leave this crazy bih despite seeing 🚩like Chinese parade
Respect. Respect yourself enough to make sure she respects you. Often all you have to do with a demanding woman... is nothing. Don't be swayed in any way.
I've just experienced the exact same situation. Though my dumbass stayed in it for over 3 years. Kudos to you for knowing when to pull the plug. Staying any longer would have been detrimental to your mental health.
Thanks! Great advice. Definitely need to keep this in mind. Just got out of a 4 year relationship last year, and this is great advice about how to approach a new relationship.
I feel like a lot of women are told “you can do better” and a lot of men are told “if she’s for you then you won’t have to try” and I think people should leave all that behind and be themselves. Whoever fits well with you as you are and makes you happy is for you. You wont have to force, you won’t have to ask for more, you wont have to go out of your way more than you already do. Communicate and be respectful. Not so simple in practice but it should be.
What you saying is like- there should be thieves, people should be more sensible and you’re right but that isn’t the case We have to police the world Similarly, it’s always good to know who you’re dealing with to have better results. And some men do get played very miserably and those gfs and wives don’t even care at all.
@@Akrazzyy we can always work towards sensibility, starting with ourselves. We’ll find people who resonate and we’ll know who we’re dealing with by spending time with them. Yes men and women are treated poorly by each other and some people have no remorse. It’s our job to be better at judging character and to be of good character ourselves.
one of the few sensible comments on here, I feel like a lot of men use this advice to excuse their misfortunes on love when in reality it’s as simple as setting boundaries on a relationship.
You're a genius. This is EXACTLY the mistake I made, and she acted/reacted EXACTLY like you describe. PS: This is the first time I've ever left a comment on RUclips.
My wife never is satisfied with any of my accomplishments but boy she love points out my flaws and tells me what I’m not doing and not pursuing her enough. I told her yesterday, would you pursue someone if they’re always bring up your flaws and belittling you? It’s like the lightbulb went off but then she went back to her expectations of me and how I’m not meeting them. 😂
If I was you, I would begin putting all of your assets under your moms name and file for divorce before she divorce g*rapes you into oblivion(sui/cide).
Yep, she has to go. She's only bringing down your mental health and unless she's putting out once a day and twice on Saturday she's not worth it. Scrape her off.
This actually makes alot of sense. I broke up with my ex because it seemed the harder I tried to please her, the more she found fault in everyrhing I did. I was sort of left in a constant "damned if I do, damned if I dont" state of mind with it all. Once the depressive emotions started surfacing I pulled the plug. Im too old to be trying to live up to anyones standards (and approval) but my own and my childrens.
Glorious Disappointing Master of the Shaolin Temple For Disappointing-Women-Fu here. I'm an expert trainer of disappointers of women because I have disappointed so many of them. They key is, my son, you must really lean into the disappointment. Go out of your way to disappoint her in strange and inventive ways. If she asks for a drink of water, throw a banana cream pie in her face. If she asks you to take her out to dinner, put on a chicken costume and dance a mambo. If she asks you to meet her family, dress up like a pirate and speak only as a pirate for the next 7 weeks. Women love disappointment and she will be putty in your hands. OR not. Most likely not. But the key is, you were never going to make her happy anyway so at least you had fun with your disappointments. Glad I didn't help at all.
You need to disappoint a woman early on. If you, like me, are way too friendly and giving in to everything she says, she will slowly lose respect. As soon as she puts you in low value land, and you suddenly start to change behaviour, that’s very upsetting to women, and she might cut you off completely if she can’t receive any value from you anymore. That’s why I have to keep reminding myself to set boundaries EARLY in the progression of things and take control of my friendlyness. But it’s easier said than done, even though you are doing it with your best intentions to succeed with her, it doesn’t feel like that in the moment.
@@fredrikdippel3664 - he isn't saying refuse her EVERYTHING. He is saying use your own discretion and don't agree to what you don't honestly agree with. Not all Yes or all No. Don't be a pushover or she will lose any respect for you.
This is why we say "just be yourself". Continue doing what you were doing and what you genuinely want to keep doing. She won't magically stop liking you for it.
Believe it or not this message makes me (and probably other men) less likely to pursue a relationship. Too many unpredictable, frivolous moving parts just to continue qualifying. F**k their wants, desires, & expectations.
see for me this changes everything, this is pretty much the key to the last relationship I had which was extremely painful for the reasons stated in the vid. Get back on the horse, just when they go to walk away, just don't follow them.
Relationships are not worth it. I was a diehard, romantic, and a monogamist. Never again. I’ve learned too many hard lessons. Modern women have no role, they have no direction, and no boundaries slap that on top of being endlessly selfish and you have a recipe for disaster every time, they never take accountability and they don’t believe in self sacrifice. I just have fun with them now they’re basically just accessories at this point. And again this is coming from someone who was searching for the love of his life ever since he was old enough to know what that meant.
@@Trax_travels same here. I was really a great man and really want to treat good my woman. But now I know they are basically never ever satisfy why should I lose my time, energy, money on someone who will never be satisfy…?
this attitude won't help you buddy. as humans, we've got the need to make relationships and to satisfy our romantic wants. you should just face the reality of human behavior as it is and live your life based on it
The only thing that can give satisfy women is *emotional connection* You have to make her love doing things for you start small. Emotional nourishing through emotional intimacy and handling disrespect is crucial.
Really great advice! And beware of women that will simply not accept to be disappointed. They will hold onto it, and scowl at you for weeks, months, years, holding onto that thing so that they make sure you feel punished and never repeat that "offense" ever again. Run away from such women.
A woman will never be satisfied, ever, no matter how much you try and give, never. The best approach? Have fun while you are with her, don't try too hard don't try too little, just the right amount, enjoy every minute you're with her because rest assured she'll leave, enjoy her while she's still here. That's the biggest red pill in my personal experience and opinion
Guys don’t say this is wise or that you love it. This is absolutely fucking wrong and an incredible tragedy that this man thinks that. Vicente, women are real people. People lose respect for you over time when you continually disrespect them by thinking of them as less than or that you have to play these weird games. It sounds like this is the real issue for most people in these comments.
@@ProfessorThock I've had several women, I'm talking from experience and from friends and colleagues anecdotes. On top of that you find men online who can rely with what is being said. You just don't like it because it makes women look bad, well, too bad, they're human beings, and very flawed human beings at that. A man should never hate women, be he should never pedestalize them either
@@ProfessorThock ? All he's saying is to enjoy the time you have with your woman and don't be a simp. It's sage advice. He didn't say anything about them being less than. He's simply accepted the fact that most relationships end and that the appropriate thing to do is enjoy your time with someone and don't get too attached nor neglect them. There's no logical reason to expect someone to be in your life forever so I don't see any issue with his comment.
Nailed it, this is why my marriage ended, I tried to give her everything she wanted within reason and gave everything I could give, when I realized it was never going to be enough and started reigning things in after 11 years, she became more vicious and manipulative than I had ever realized she was capable of. I told her no and stood my ground often, which kept he interested, and fueled my irritation at her lack of satisfaction with my efforts. Lesson, set the boundaries early, don't give more than is reasonable, it won't get you more love or respect, just misery and resentment.
@@yezkex you’re obviously a woman. It would be the stupidest thing possible to sit down and have a conversation about how you “both” (meaning her) want to be loved. That’s literally sitting down to hear her list of demands. The whole point of the video is that you have to disappoint her - you’re willing to provide what you are willing to provide not whatever she wants. and she can deal with it if she wants to be with you.
Man you just described how my long time relationship ended, I was doing everything and changing who I was to become something that would bring her and closer, and the worst part when it all ended I couldn’t recognize myself anymore, thanks for sharing you knowledge. Greetings from Brazil.
This is ESPECIALLY harder in Single Mother homes because our relationship personality develops based on keeping a usually narcissistic mom happy....which transfers to girlfriends & wives.
Don’t disrespect moms by generalizing that single moms are narcissists. Maybe yours was but don’t speak for other people. At the end of the day at least one person was there for a 2 person job.
@@callme_t you could've easily kept it moving if this was not about you, but this statement was for those who AGREED, so you can move along and kick rocks✌🏾
@@callme_tmine definitely was (and still very much is) narcissistic. The reason there was only “one person for a two-person job” was because she kicked my father out and thought life would be nicer if she just did everything herself.
Idk your personality, but generally I've observed, the less your crush(works for both genders) is attracted to you, the more you're attracted to them. Finally if it's a person you never wanted, nothing will happen.
Relationships have always operated this way…… The king has harems of woman pining after him….. biology dictates survival mechanisms for the entire species… our DNA is encoded to procreate and Protect our bloodlines…. For men this means sexual reproduction with as many females as possible in a short time. For females this means finding a Suitable Partner to protect offspring, and than another if the suitable partner becomes unable to protect offspring. We are just as bacteria or the smallest organisms, our innate genetics will dictate our macro behaviors as humans. Male and female. Opposites and One
Damn, I knew this so well before I got married. 35 years later and I have all but forgotten about this truth. End result is, after loosing myself she is now gone, too. Smh.
@@pacha777 It's really sad isn't it, the length really DOES NOT matter when it comes to Women. On the other hand, you have the Sunken Cost Fallacy. The thing is, you only get one life with a limited amount of time in it.
It's also through disappointment and conflict where you reveal a person's true colors and character.. You're not really learning anything about your partner when everything is sunshine and rainbows. One of the worst things you could do is marry a woman without walking through some fires with her.
Men shouldn't be afraid of disappointing women, including dumping them or feeling bad for not reciprocating their feelings, because life is a series of disappointments and in fact, they need to get to know this while they can still handle it. If it's not you, something else will disappoint them. You can't shield people from disappointments.
Disappointing a woman or standing up to her, letting her know what your boundaries are and enforcing them is a brilliant way of getting that woman out of your life for good so she can go and jump on a simp who'll never do any of that.
@@Jadaks I've heard the same from other men, and I don't doubt your experience. It's that I've only once witnessed what you describe, in a marriage where he took several years to train her to behave properly. I used to know a married woman who admitted to me that it took her husband some time to also train her to behave properly. In the vast majority of the other marriages I've seen, it's clear she doesn't respect her husband, and I guess is only with him for utility, despite him breaking his back for her.
@Tom-A062 I would disagree with you there. Some woman won't last with men that respect themselves, but im those situations its best that it doesn't last because, to me, that means she isn't looking for a partner, she's looking for someone she can take advantage of. Every GOOD woman I've ever known greatly respects a man that respects himself and is confident in himself.
@@TheMonkeygrunt That's how single women used to behave. They don't any more. What I mainly see around me is women using men, and men seemingly happy to be her servant. I also see men who treat their women like sh1t, and that's also how to keep her around. Respect yourself and be confident in yourself is repulsive to women.
Very true. Emotions are fleeting and women have mastered the art of turning cold in an instant once they figured you out. Stay mysterious/distant and cold ( just like all the bad boys) that give them butterflies and you'll last longer than 6 mins in that relationship.
I dated a lot of girls in my teen years from 14yr all the way up. I learned this lesson inside-out by the time I was a few months shy of being 19. It's served me well ever since, especially throughout my current relationship that I've been in for over 14yrs. I've seen family and friends lose women like that, and no matter how much I talk It's like they can't grasp the concept.
I can tell you a lot of it comes purely by instinct and giving in to a sort of manipulative calling from your mind. I've simped and I've done the opposite. Sometimes the simpery comes instinctual, then it works like she wanted that in some twisted way, sometimes the opposite comes instinctually, and she comes running back or vying for attention. It's when I've done things out of thinking and reasoning out that it's been a miss. Like, if i conciously play the game with rules in my mind, it all falls apart. But when I hear to my heart, knowing a certain outcome already if I just tug this way or that, finding out openings in emotional vulnerability almost for a good throw, then it hits.
Note that getting used to *disappointing women* has two meanings: 1) The art of disappointing women 2) Acceptibg that women are deceiving in their nature
I've just discovered this channel, now I'm binge watching. You describe all of the problems I have encountered. I have never had problems attracting women, but so often I have either pleased them to the point they lose respect, or I become resentful that all my efforts and time don't elicit the response I was expecting. It's all so clear now 🤦♂️
Everyone says they don't understand women, and probably no one fully does, but you, my dude go a long way. Super smart, great advice all consuming is right. Many women say the 6 foot, six-figure salary thing, if that were good enough and they were happy if they got that that'd be fine, but when are they ever happy even if they do get that?
In the beginning of our relationship I told him he was the Captain of the ship and I was 2nd in command. He has yet to disappoint me and we are starting year 14. I am not the typical woman because I want my man to spend time with his friends playing golf or just hanging out. He is not in my life to entertain me 24/7. We blended our lives together and I appreciate our time together. All I want from him is that whichbhe gives freely and I have only one expectation of him and that is he love and take care of himself, because you can't give what you don't have.
The software inside her head is equal in importance as your attraction to her. Healthy boundaries and expectations is the key to any relationship. Unfortunately today many women don't take the time to consider what her future husband or boyfriend wants out of a relationship until she's too damaged or it's too late. Guys are conditioned by society to be doormats and women to be entitled this will always end badly
I'm 50 years old, never married but have had my share of women in my lifetime. I've made this mistake before. I sure do wish this golden knowledge were around back in my day. No men ever dropped wisdom like this to me or anyone I know. Young men, take note of these videos! Learn from the mistakes of others. The worst mistake you can make is to believe that women think like men and that just because you would or wouldn't do something that they would or wouldn't. Every man I know has been cheated on and none of them saw it coming.
I've been watching videos like this for a few years now and it occurred to me awhile back that women are screwed. You can't put this information back in the bottle. Men from every corner of the globe young and old have come together to crack the code. The internet isn't going away. Just think about what it's going to be like in one hundred years when every guy is well educated in female bullshit by the time they are 20. I honestly think we are watching the dynamics between men and women change forever in real time.
That is true I am 51 and men believe women are all sugar and spice. They ain't. Sure still good women out there but Vet them. Many are selfish because they have it too easy and dont work for it. They just rock up here I am 😆
We had this knowledge, but we ignored it. We wanted to hold onto that woman. I've done it. We all have. It's part of life. Oddly, I don't regret it. I had some good and bad memories.
i wished i had this advice given to me 20 years ago when i was a young man. after being in a long relationship and finally getting married, i just realise how true this advice is. women’s love is quite selfish as they want everything from you. all your time, all your attention and especially, all your money.
Absolutely true. I was in my zone. Confident, healthy, deep well of will power. Making money, friends, nothing could get under my skin. Met the love of my life who just wanted me to, "lighten up". I thought i reached the point where I could... Relationship was over in 6 months and I was left weak, pathetic, with nothing. A woman is like getting a pay check for your labor. Just because you got paid and can pay rent, doesn't mean you quit your job.
I am a woman and I binge watch all of your videos so I can be better. If a woman wants too bad enough she will do what it takes. Good women are out there guys but the best partner is the one in the mirror. ❤
It's not about being good or bad ,its not your fault I guess , a women doesnt necessarily puts effort to become like this , it sort of a byproduct of being programmed the way we are
@@ajaynair2636right , I just wrote about that above !, how affection slowly seems to dissipate once the purpose is fulfilled. Honestly the way we're living and have lived there only seems one way to have lasting relation , which is to talk about these things , know that you aren't programmed for eternal love but still making concious efforts towards keeping each other happy, knowing we all desire the same thing to and fulfilling that for each other , and that we're together in this mystery.
You are spitting nothin but facts my bro. I hope some people get this, i’ve been in a bunch of relationships and the ones where the woman was most attracted to me were the ones I was able to disappoint them. Make them feel like I didn’t care as much but it’s a give and take. I gave the most when she was good to me, and the second I smelt funny shit I switched real quick. thank you for the video !
Nice guys who give her everything normally finish last. While some women will keep going back to the bad boys because they are addicted to the emotional rollercoaster of the highs and lows (i.e. disappointment). Do not be boring as this will not excite her and leave her feeling dead inside. Feminine love is consumptive so keep feeding her that spice.
Stop thinking in "nice" and "bad" - that's the first mistake. Be more nuanced. Think of what would make you compatible with the woman you desire and admire. Think of a few hundred positive aspects of a person and his habits which you can offer, and who would appreciate them? Don't give them for free to just anyone, but somebody deserving. It can be simple things, like; you can dance, give a creative compliment, and be polite around her grandma, but also deeper things, like your faith and values, your capacity achieve long term goals, keep promises, and learn new difficult things - or in between; you can handle a household, you can handle a Sunday afternoon, you can support your spouse when she is upset about work-trouble, you can handle a garden or house upgrade? Can you share a budget? Can you prioritize, both your, and her, and your common needs, for the long haul? Can you keep your spirit up and preserve good cheer in everyday and crises? Our do you risk to be the man that goes for a football match with buddies, when she risks to go into labor or a collapse under sleepless nights with a colicky baby?
@@DNA350ppm This one sounds worried that men are waking up. Sure, a man can and should be helpful and fatherly in a family ... but he STILL must be be able to handle female nature.
@@braneenie Oh no, I love men waking up, men are so covertly oppressed! But not by women in the first place, but by the demands on men, that as a corollary has that men have a distorted view on women and what women are, want, and need. When men use women as part of the arsenal by which they impress on other men, then everything gets scewed in relationships.
@@DNA350ppm dude, not being rude, just blunt. this red pill masculine whatever you're into - you sound as a crazy as a crazy feminist. for real, (again, not being rude, believe or not) check in with yourself what is dogma from these yt ppl etc and what ideas, in your gut, and feel right. To you. now i've been burned more by women than anything so i know the feels but this is looking like you let it mess you up vs show you the pain that was there before you even knew what a girlfriend is, (IFS is the only therapy that works so try that first. all the modalities that you know suck, do actually suck, i've done it all, IFS is something special)
This is so true!! My ex (over 20 years ago) totally lost interest because I worshiped her too much. I'm the opposite with my current wife, and she is super attracted to me even after 15 years of marriage. Man I wish I had known this principle of human behavior in my early 20's.
@@macrickNo it isn't. Men overall aren't group thinkers even if there's comformists. Women want what other women want (especially men) since it secures the success of their offspring.
@@edheldudeMen are group thinkers too. Why do you think revolutions happen on a large scale ? The only thing is men can survive being a lonewolf while women can't.
@@anshulguptain yeah i think it's probably on a spectrum which is dependent on multiple factors. But generally speaking, it's safe to say women are more collectivist and conformist than men.
Bro I swear to god I think all women are like this. Same thing thing with my wife, she was OBSESSED with me when I had 9s and 10s chasing me around. I was the better looking partner and she was more like a 7/8 on the looks scale. But I ended up choosing her instead of the 9s and 10s because I figured hey the less prettier one will be the least likely to be tempted to cheat. Well turns out she cheated anyway with an absolute loser coworker. It didn’t last for more than 1 month before she couldn’t stand him. Now she wants me back LOL! Women truly are atrocious decision makers. Yes some women are intelligent and not like this but the vast majority are.
You hit the nail on the dot. It's sad for me. I found this out after the age of 25. However, I learned not to give women everything they wanted, and somehow, I found more women being drawn to me. Maybe I just had to grow up and have more self-respect. I feel great now. It took me so long to figure all this out
Love yourself first. Work on yourself, build a body, have a nice car (maintain it). Learn new skills/hobbies. Women get attracted to men who are happy and stable.
It sounds like that's your perception of your attraction after repeated failings. Just remind yourself that's not how the world outside of your mind is viewing you. The world has no idea. But if you keep thinking that about yourself, you'll naturally give off that negative energy, and carry your body in a way that might tell them. Then they'll treat you accordingly (which is not a good thing). Take it all in stride, and keep trying. That's what I do. Success comes when you least expect it. Just maintain positive energy. Save the sulking and licking your wounds for when you're alone in private or hanging with your most trusted boys.
I agree everything you said. This has been proven already by Psychology. Be the guy that she complains about but never leaves than she gets bored and cheats on you.
If she loved you, she would have understood and stayed together. You will find a better woman. Note that she.probably did not loved you, but she loved what YOU could give to her. You dodged a bullet, a good woman will cate and support for you, and dont dump you if you refuse what she wants (in the moment)
Sounds like you stopped having fun with her due to wanting to save more money. There has to be a balance. The couple that has fun together stays together. Assuming both people value integrity.
I feel you. I can't speak to safe but I can speak to finances. Women don't want to help you to have money. They want someone who already has money. Then they want to spend it. Keep being careful with your money. Build some assets. As you know, money makes money. Then you will have more money to spend also. When you have more money you will be attractive to women. Find one who can live with your boundaries. Make it clear at the beginning that you will never spend more than you make or never spend more than you make minus some savings. It may be hard to find someone like that but they are out there.
I mean, i dunno. When a woman told me no, i got less interested clearly. This whole "the harder to get the more you want it" menatlity is just fundamentally toxic and miserable in my experience...
Yeah, you got disinterested clearly because you weren't that interested in the first place. A threshold amount of attraction/interest is required for this thing to work.
This kind of presentation is really great because it doesn’t seem to be polarized for or against men and women. These are just straight facts and they are useful.
The bit near the end of the video where he says, to paraphrase: regardless of whether it should or shouldn't be that way, that's the way it is. That is applicable to so many things in life.
knowing she will never be happy relieves the guilt of eventually "no meeting her expectations". it frees you to be who you are and make the mistakes you will make, because its inevitable
5:47 “Women like to test how much they can get away with.” So Damn True. Most Truest Words Ever. The thing is it doesn’t just apply to Women-Only. It applies to Humanity as a whole in General.
It paints women as she-devils that are out to exploit the poor, innocent hardworking men. However, both men and women tend to test how much they can get away with. Men will do it to women just the same.
profound. I think it's that coating being applied on that "want" -of suffering. Because you don't give-they suffer/feel unjust > which makes the giver feel bad for not giving. And 'feeling bad for' is where it all starts falling down. Emotional manipulation which demands some tactics to acquire the antidote for it..
Long-term relationship ended because of giving too much love. 11 years. Learnt a hard lesson and now after 4 years it turns out this is a generic psychology. Weirdly accurate.
Billions of humans on earth, patterns are nature. Therefore it is good sense to study the psychology of Human relations before entering into them seriously. As humans we are just as plants or animals, natural, instinctual, and human… running off emotions and Survival mechanisms ingrained for thousands of years.
Absolutely. Love itself is the bare minimum. Everything else we do for each other is extra and should be cherished. A flower from your lover should be worth a million from your friend. If you’re expecting everything and more from the person you are with, you are a problem. “We never go on dates” starts taking them out once a month “we only go on dates once a month” starts taking them out weekly “you never buy me random gifts” starts buying them random gifts “it doesn’t count because I asked” “don’t you think there’s other guys out there who wouldn’t struggle to give me the bare minimum?” Flashback to a time when “all I wanted was you” If you’re not satisfied with love itself, you don’t deserve it. A person who loves you will give and do anything they can. Without feedback, that may take shape in ways you don’t expect or don’t even see. But if you’re unwilling to see what a person does for you, you’re never going to be happy, no matter how much more they do for you. You’re still unwilling to see it. So you’re never going to register in your head that they are indeed doing things for you. If the love is worthless to you, you don’t deserve it.
Rejection and disappointment are spices to people with low I.Q, low self esteem, and masochists. Normal person moves on to a partner that is interested. It's called having dignity.
I'm so glad someone said this! The only women who are attracted to men that reject and dissapoint them are women who grew up with a father figure who rejected and dissapointed her. Mature women with healthy self esteem prefer partners who treat them with kindness and respect.
well, by the bell curve you could literally say 60% of the entire population is not really that specially, only 23% are lucky enough to have a little bit more IQ, than the average John Doe, while basically the upper 2.5% are not interessted in people, because high IQ indivduals are often isolated or alone.
Men and women love differently. Feminine love is consumptive: it wants as much of you inside of her as possible. However, when it is actually successful in its objective, it grows disinterested in that which it was once fascinated by. It falls to men to hold the line against this consumption for the good of both parties, which will require them to occasionally disappoint their women. Those who fail to develop this skill will learn to regret it.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #women #relationship
If feminine love is consumptive, what is the best word to describe masculine love?
@@justarthur1788Perhaps a providing love
@@justarthur1788 I'll stay in this comment section until a word has been found for masculine love.
Feminine ‘love’ (generally speaking) is ‘consumptive’ as stated, self-serving, drawing all phenomena unto herself…only then can she feel free to ‘love’ in a limited way that suits her wants and needs only.
Masculine love (generally speaking) is expansive, all-encompassing, looking outwards, idealistic (in a positive way) transforming, a love that reaches beyond just himself, towards the stars, a love that benefits ALL.
@@samuelbeatsminecraft2049
Expansive. All-encompassing.
Disappointing women isn't a skill; it's literally effortless. No matter what you do, she will be disappointed.
What requires skill is not caring what women want.
Well said ..... There are very few women you can please in this world ....
If you care too little and give too less, she is gone too.
A man should be genuine, and strive for what he needs and wants, in trustful and truthful interactions with other persons - he should be open, and see if his and her aims and values align in a relationship. Not use any faking tricks and games. Not assuming this or that. Be manly and dare to talk. Nobody will be as disppointed as the one who was cheated into believing that false was true.
If a man wants a one night stand, he should say so. If his aim is a life-long marriage, he should not only show it in words but also in his every act and consideration - it is a demanding, but rewarding goal, but it doesn't come on wishful demand, it has to be a result of daily effort and responsibility. But it is very rewarding to achieve something difficult and valuable. A man can naturally negotiate for something in between, too - most importantly dare to be honest!
Just be a man..done
@@DNA350ppmyes. Honesty and no games.
How to do make a woman miserable? Give her everything that she wants.
To be fair, the same can be said of men
@@Amlux1984true, but I think that men are less likely to throw a temper tantrum at our significant other If we get a no for an answer.
Counterpoint: The fastest way to prove a woman has no idea what she wants is to give her what she asks for. (Note of caution, this can also be very expensive)
😂🤣😅😆
What you mean? All women are miserable, it's just they hide it well
Married 21 years here. No matter what you do, you will disappoint her. Get used to it.
True and it only gets worse, live with it
I think his idea os more that you disappoint her under your control. That she will be more and more disappointed by everything you give her, is a given.
She disappoints herself by setting her own expectations.
That just makes me even less interested in marriage and relationships.
@@latt.qcd9221 hormones, we all got them
Listening to this guys talks makes me full heartedly want to just be single.
@@full.rom.fitness good
Don't let these parasites leech on you
@@full.rom.fitness that’s exactly how I feel, why should I need to play this games.
I'm 51 years old and was married for quite a while now divorce. You are 100% correct. Stay single at all costs it's just not worth it.
Nobody is an adult until 40s. I should have held out and had a better grasp of reality. I leaned tough lessons that cost more than money- which is worse since money is easy to get, but stress takes life away that time is gone. It's a humongous change to make mid life in 50s but very possible. Better to build your kingdom first, then you'll be far more careful who you let in to your precious space
girls are insane full stop
Yup. Same goes for children. Giving them everything they want is disastrous and irresponsible.
Exactly. What these videos are about are children with curvy bodies, not mature women.
@@Pomoscorzoimagine believing that isn't the super-majority of women anyways.
@@PomoscorzoI'll believe you when I'll meet one.
Remember; Women should be treated like the child in the relationship.
@@blastermaster7261 Immature women are more likely to offer their bodies to a man easily, that's why they date them. Grown-up women who can think for themselves and want an equal relationship, want to be friends first and protect their femaleness are uninteresting for guys whose first priority is how quickly and how often they can get laid.
You want sex, you get nothing but sex. And you pay, with money, time and stress.
Disappointing women? Dude I was born for this.
LOL Yes!
😂😂
Lmao
😂😂
😂😂😂
This is valid, you're a life savior for young men out there. I've been in a 7 years relationship (not married) and she defines her love to me by the level of amusement she gets and how I adjust my life towards her OWN standard. She left me (monkey-branched to another dude) when she realized she won't be getting any of it anymore, I chose another path. She has also denied me for sex only to regret later on that I don't even touch or kiss her anymore, no matter how sexy she was trying to be. Guys, don't be a simp. Happiness is never about the maximum amount of joys (sex, food, money, etc), rather the absence of suffering!
The last sentence is gold.
@@nonenothing4412 Thank you. I read Arthur Schopenhauer and Friedrich Nietzsche's works a lot. Their books are highly recommended!
@@thepainphantom thanks bro, I don't have a lot of time, so I'll try to listen to them in audio format.
@@nonenothing4412 I'd say what her meant by his last sentence was rather peace, than happiness.
@@thepainphantom not the best referents for female behavior though.
Saying NO to her will make her respect you.
Saying too much YES all the time to her, will make her leave you.
Always saying no is the best. There are studies out there that narcissistic behavior on the side of the man had zero negative impact on average for a relationship, also the archtype with the highest numbers of women are Dark Triade, basically narcissistic, violent and manipulative men.
@@sad_wrangler8515 Where can I find a study like that?
And it's not as clear as that even, there's a gradient which includes their instinct to start lies, dating apps 'accidently' get downloaded, they prepare prior to leave. At the expense of manipulating and damaging parts of you in the process
"If you don't give a woman what she wants, She will be unhappy. If you give a woman what she wants she will be miserable".
Lmao
Exactly
A lot of women were not taught how to receive love. So they don't want to feel vulnerable by you leveraging on your gifts
@@morpheus7422a lot of women also haven't been taught how to give love either 😂
Great paradox
This is pretty spot on….
My (now ex) girlfriend of almost a year came to me and said I’m not affectionate enough and that she wants me to use more words of affirmation, use more emotion when texting, use “I love you” instead of “love you”, etc. I made a serious effort to start doing those things after that conversation.
She broke up with me 2 weeks later.
Too little, too late. I'm sorry for you!
😂😂😂 “broke up w me 2 weeks later.” Trolled you.
@@learncadadia7832 100% lol
@@learncadadia7832 There you go, decent women don't understand men's double speak! I can't believe you have much success with such parole.
You should have ignored her.
This Man's vocabulary and communication skills are on another level
@@justchilling177 totally, my Dude.
From decades of experience playing the field, to quitting playing music and devoting my life and resources to a single woman's well-being, self-esteem and even her immediate family, I can regretfully say, that this is 100% true. I wish I had seen this video in 2012.
Man, I’m so sorry for your experience.
Same here friend, 3 years of nothing but loses. Hopefully youre doing better
You and I both my friend
After hearing you guys and this video, ill stay on the cliff dont want to jump anymore.
Yep! I wished I have seen this video in 1985. Married 38 years in two successive relationships, I can testifie you will never be good enough for the spouse. Your life will be a daily surrender, a betray of yourself, and you will end hating yourself for this.
This advice is G O L D
I cannot stress enough how important this is.
Should be mandatory education for every teen/young man.
No guy should waste his time on drama with women, whatever kind it may be
Simps deserve the worse scorn and punishment possible
If you know that this is GOLD-class advice, then its secret power makes me want to hear from your wife: what makes her so happy about being your partner in life - because I myself can't imagine how come - it sounds impossible. What makes her so happy about you that this advice functions?
No the only advice for this generation is to ensure pregnancy and marriage doesnt occur which will avoid all the issues. For this guys should immediately take his girlfriend to get Tubal Ligation and still buy and give her daily birth control pills after taken in front of you and also Plan B pill after consulting with a doctor each time after intercourse.
@@rejectionistmanifesto8836 Better he gets himself a vasectomy, it is easier, safer and cheaper. A one time effort. 😀 But use condoms anyway, not to catch STD!!! (Mind you, condoms are totally within a man's control. In some countries you get them for free.)
@@DNA350ppm yes he should also but it is just as crucial to also get his girlfriend to do it if she wants a relationship.
This video should be watched by every single man wanting to be in a relationship. This is an extremely important video. It should be watched 10 times by every guy!
❤
Thanks for the support, Joe. I really appreciate it.
Thanks for supporting brother ,,, really appreciate ❤
❤️❤️❤️ Life changing, if it used wisely!!!!
I agree, had I been taught this type of content in high school my life would have been changed for the better. I am a good guy but I made huge Blue Pill mistakes like marrying @ age 19.
Dude. I love the world we have today. This is the reason they are professionals. They learn and know what took you years to learn. For a young person, you are fortunate this information is just laying out here for you. As a man, you have to maintain a level of detachment no matter how your woman wants everything- your time, your thoughts. You run the program and must stick to the plan.
@@eoleol4750 Underated Comment
Even if you maintain level of detachment they can still draw you in and you'll dip real fast without knowing it
Their games is atrocious
“You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.”
- Chris Rock
It's not like you get that with men. I mean, look at all the cheerful, satisfied men leaving comments under this video.
Oh, wait, bad example.....
@PGHEngineer I read it more as venting from personal experience. I see that venting and never being satisfied as two completely different things
@@CastleRaccon I see it as complaining about life when they are with women, but subtly revealing how obsessed they are with getting with a woman just by being here and moaning incessantly about it.
😭
He's not wrong.
Brother just broke down the psychology of simping. 👍
Same goes for disappointment of her kids.
Forget about simping, the fact that he said that disappointing is a spice of a relationship 😅 what ???????!!!!! 😂 This is pure nonsense. Is not even logical. I know that women are different psicologicaly speaking, but, the fact that a so called psicologist could encourage disappointment is a new one for me.
You got it backwards
@@mauriciolopez1235 Most nice guys are people pleasers. When it comes to a woman they worship her and just cannot say no to anything she wants no matter how unreasonable.Try that and see how it works out.
@@mauriciolopez1235Women are like children....what happens when you give a kid everything....
I was married for 28 years and ended it last September. I was in a constant state of capitulating to her. I was actually fearful of disappointing her. Well, I was miserable for the majority of the relationship but it had quickly become my normal state of being. I did not know any better. If I had known the truth of this episode, my reality would have been different. But, now it is and I am loving life and who I am. Thank you, Orion. Life changing. Young men, listen and believe this.
Keep on keeping on, brother
I did not capitulate, I did my own things and she dumped me brutally after 20 years of marriage.
That's an opportunity to live your life less with her making you miserable@@marguskiis7711
Yes! Young men
Listen up very carefully. Do no ignore red flags that are waved right in your face. I did that for 20yrs....It got me nothing but heartaches, anxiety , sadness and an empty bank account. Eyes but especially EARS wide open
Seeing comments like yours on this channel makes me feel better that I got out of mine in 9 years. It started off well, ups and downs but then was maintained by me capitulating to her ever taller demands of me and her not understanding that I need to sacrifice going out on dates for my career. Every time I'd not go out with her and prioritise work, she would start emotion dumping about how she's feeling alone and caged and this and that. I'd tell her that if she wants to keep going out late at nights with her friends drinking, then me and her aren't going to work out. So she would use that to manipulate me, whether she realised it or not, to at least have me go out with her. Like, relax woman. Going out only a couple times a month until I get my finances up was too much for her. "At least once a week". And I live in a small city with nothing to do but visit the same odd cafes, bars, theatres, I don't know what the hell she got out of it. I was fine watching netflix with her while screensharing. We couldn't live together cause she lived with her parents.
Dissappoint women and 90% will throw a tempere tantrum, sulk in despondency, keep score in bitterness, withdraw affection. The 10% are the gems
more like 0.01%
AWALT. There are no unicorns
Having experienced both I’m grateful it was 1:1 and not 9:1😂
there are no gems
@@meneliksolomon7984 because they truly love you!
The key is indifference. When you can disappoint them and not care about the out come.
Precisely. So many men think indifference is the key to keeping a woman. No. Indifference is indifference. It's not caring whether she stays or leaves.
@@IkesPimpHand Its not about not caring. We are humans, of course we care if our loved one leaves. What takes strength and character is standing on your principles and doing the right thing even if she might leave.
Maintaining some detachment with your attachments is a tricky thing.
So true. I quit on women entirely a decade ago and it was like I flipped on a light switch and was suddenly visible to them. Same guy, same values, I just stopped thinking about my life relative to them and suddenly I was desirable even to strangers since I now give off a completely different vibe.
If the key is indifference then why be in a relationship in the first place? What kind of relationship are you trying to build if you’re numb to how you disappoint them? Generally speaking, a person who lacks conviction for disappointing people are also less likely to hold themselves accountable.
I find the idea of always stressing out and thinking of keeping someone very exhausting. Focus on yourself first.. know your limitations and boundaries so when you get involved with someone.. you get there from a place of joy and love.. not attachment and overthinking to keep the person.. you offer yourself for the buyers.. if the buyer is no longer interested.. it’s not personal.. you enjoyed their company already.. and that’s a win.. now you move on lightly and keep doing your thing which is focusing on being your authentic self under all circumstances.
best comment
Just be better and you will have respect for yourself, you'll do the things he said subconsciously
@@abhishekdubey9935 literally, should have all the likes
Yes, great advice for men. Most men will ignore it though and find out the hard way.
This 1000%, this is truly the only way to navigate this world.
So on point when it comes to female nature. This should be dating 101 for every man. So many of us get our programming from Disney movies and it's not helpful at all.
It's not about just women. It's about humans in general.
The man is a rich handsome prince and the woman has nothing like Cinderella.
and remember programming by (grnd.) mthr.s from earliest on. not necessarily deserving per-default-(!!)-halo, to be sincere. merely xx.s in any inherent aspect, too.
Facts, once you realize this you win at life
You should probably get out there and look for modest personalities in other women. What the guy describes is like if they only have one type of woman out there lol.
When someone breaks up with you, go full no contact. Never, ever break that rule.
For a certain period yes. After that period you should reevaluate, once the the hurt heals a bit. If it was a good relationship, and you still want it, then start talking again.
@@swim3530 only, and I mean, ONLY if they initiate contact first. Otherwise they are dead. You can never contact them again. Otherwise, you're coming to the table with a weaker hand, and open yourself to be taken advantage of.
disagree. I think either person can initiate contact esp. if it was a mutual breakup, grew apart. The problem is most fems get really bitter if you breakup with them, and rejected them. They cant get over it! Meanwhile guys get rejected all the time! Fragile egos for being so "strong and independent"!? 😆
I think that limiting oneself from following the heart is itself a weakness, so there is just a choice between two lower status.
However in my perspective both reaching out and not are not considered negative.
@@dampnickers Exactly, she broke up with me and i came back like a dog, never make that mistake
Jesus. 33M married 5 years. Did NOT expect this to ring so true. It may not be PC by today’s standards, but he 100% understands human nature. He’s right on all points. Wow.
this is a great explanation for a problem my friend has: all his girlfriends end up liking him as a friend and they eventually break up without any passion or emotion or need for each other. it fizzles out completely. because he's extremely conflict avoidant and he boasts he never, ever fights with his girlfriends on anything, including very petty tiny arguments. But that's actually the problem. He becomes a butler that's rent-free.
I think u need to have downs to remember the ups. Women are emotional beings, they Need to feel a range of emotion, not picture perfect love on a pedestal
@@agentnukaz1715 I will remember this to compose better music 👌
If she dont bring drama, bring the drama to her and play with her emotions.
But this man just spoke about how to not fight a woman.
@@romaroalte2645 the best music is like that. The highs feel that much higher if you drag the listener through hell first
Absolutely true. If I had known this 10 years ago I would have saved so much time, energy, and resources.
@@eladbari Meaning either navigating the relationship better, getting out sooner, or avoiding it altogether.
Same
One of the reasons im glad i was born in this time and can learn these things at 20 y/o
Man, I know right?
“A woman in love wants to put you inside of her…”
Yup, sounds about right.
or she wants to put herself inside of you. That way she can control you.
😂😂 💯
"I'm talkin' 'bout baaaalls deep in loooove." - Cleveland Brown, Jr.
@@Dannyblazer1985with all my hand and my arm
You understood the double entendre. Congratulations.
The main management technique i do is tell them women no and disagree with them 85% of the time without explanation. Works perfectly
This makes relationships seem like a waste of time and unnecessary head games just to keep one party interested. We are doomed 😂
Mmm not really. I would argue that its generally typical human social behavior. In my opinion a healthy individual (male or female) will establish boundaries in all of their relationships, be personal, family, friendship or work related. Its just part of being in a community. Dealing with woman is no different in my opinion. And to be fair to women, men have a degree of that same attribute. It's just not as prominent I don't think.
@@TheMonkeygruntIt’s one thing to have boundaries, and it's another thing to have boundaries you have to constantly enforce. Women want as if they're entitled to your being simply from having the title of girlfriend whereas your friends behave completely differently. My friends can fuction if I don't see them for a month. My girl on the otherhand...that wpuld be an issue. He's right, the neediness makes you question if a relationship is even worth it. To be fair, family does have entitlement too but it doesn't threaten to strip your autonomy to the degree of a woman's love. A woman's love gradually just heads in the direction of codepedence: she wants you to be her best friend, she wants to move in with you, she wants to sleep in the same bed, she wants you to commit to her emotionally and physically, ahe wants you to marry her, she wants to watch shows together, she wants to hangout together on the weekends, she wants your last name, she wants to be a part of your family...friendships aren't like this at all. That's why I think friendships are the healthiest relationship, because it's completely voluntary at every step of the way ( you don't have to pledge your commitment to your friends), and there's no entitlement because of it. I don't know the shit is annoying. I literally work with my girlfriend and I feel like I have to explain to her every week why it's ok for me to want space from her, and my days off to myself, as if I didn't spend a majority of my work day interacting with her lol. With my friends I don't have to explain shit. I just say I'm bysy, but I'll chill with you later and the world keeps spinning. It does seem like more effort than it's worth at times.
@@joungyalen25 idiots cant see the difference between men and women and keep insisting on "it not just about women, its about humans"
Thats why women were controlled in past
the channel title says it upfront - he is a hack. he is not a real psychologist, it's like Elizabeth Holmes if psychology channels. But since youtube is popular among cluster B disordered people and occasionally codependents who need the cult leader, he get the views. Same with teal swan - she get millions of views despite misleading info. None of them are qualified or actually knowledgeable.
I'm a 7th degree black belt in disappointing women. Curiously, I never even had to train to get this skill. Other men have tried to best me in this endeavor, but few have ever come close.
Yo!!!,😆😆😆😆😆😆
Naw I got you beat 😩
😂😂😂
You're a G bruv!
Respect! 🫡
😂😂😂😂
I just got out of a relationship where I kept folding to her demands and it was never enough, i was always critcized and told I could do better. 8 months of this push anr pull relationship, i was miserable, but it was a trauma bond. I finally ended it this week.
Im ready to get back to who I was and this advice is gold, set your boundaries early and if its enough to let them walk, then let them.
This video came at a perfect time for me... God bless you all and hope you prosper!
Wow🙏 God bless you 💚
Good luck with your recovery, dude.
That trauma bond 100% comes from dealing with a jezebel spirit, it’s like for some reason you find it soo hard to leave this crazy bih despite seeing 🚩like Chinese parade
Respect.
Respect yourself enough to make sure she respects you.
Often all you have to do with a demanding woman... is nothing.
Don't be swayed in any way.
I've just experienced the exact same situation. Though my dumbass stayed in it for over 3 years. Kudos to you for knowing when to pull the plug. Staying any longer would have been detrimental to your mental health.
Thanks! Great advice. Definitely need to keep this in mind. Just got out of a 4 year relationship last year, and this is great advice about how to approach a new relationship.
Good to hear that you will have this valuable information for your next relationship with only 4 years wasted from the last.
Many of the most empty and miserable men I've ever met are "Yes dear" husbands.
And many more smart men say ‘yes dear’ then quietly go ahead and do what they were going to do anyway.
I feel like a lot of women are told “you can do better” and a lot of men are told “if she’s for you then you won’t have to try” and I think people should leave all that behind and be themselves. Whoever fits well with you as you are and makes you happy is for you. You wont have to force, you won’t have to ask for more, you wont have to go out of your way more than you already do. Communicate and be respectful. Not so simple in practice but it should be.
What you saying is like- there should be thieves, people should be more sensible and you’re right but that isn’t the case
We have to police the world
Similarly, it’s always good to know who you’re dealing with to have better results.
And some men do get played very miserably and those gfs and wives don’t even care at all.
@@Akrazzyy we can always work towards sensibility, starting with ourselves. We’ll find people who resonate and we’ll know who we’re dealing with by spending time with them. Yes men and women are treated poorly by each other and some people have no remorse. It’s our job to be better at judging character and to be of good character ourselves.
one of the few sensible comments on here, I feel like a lot of men use this advice to excuse their misfortunes on love when in reality it’s as simple as setting boundaries on a relationship.
@chio1877 to be fair men setting boundaries is more maligned than the inverse. But you're right. We're all adults. We can say no.
Must be a woman
You're a genius. This is EXACTLY the mistake I made, and she acted/reacted EXACTLY like you describe. PS: This is the first time I've ever left a comment on RUclips.
Wow
Great advice, even after 30 years of marriage! I wish I had known this earlier. Thankyou!
My wife never is satisfied with any of my accomplishments but boy she love points out my flaws and tells me what I’m not doing and not pursuing her enough. I told her yesterday, would you pursue someone if they’re always bring up your flaws and belittling you? It’s like the lightbulb went off but then she went back to her expectations of me and how I’m not meeting them. 😂
Hahaha you gotta say deuces ✌️
If I was you, I would begin putting all of your assets under your moms name and file for divorce before she divorce g*rapes you into oblivion(sui/cide).
Yep, she has to go. She's only bringing down your mental health and unless she's putting out once a day and twice on Saturday she's not worth it. Scrape her off.
your life sounds like an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond
@@odoylerules4503 damn, cant bitch my way out of that one. 🤣
This actually makes alot of sense. I broke up with my ex because it seemed the harder I tried to please her, the more she found fault in everyrhing I did. I was sort of left in a constant "damned if I do, damned if I dont" state of mind with it all. Once the depressive emotions started surfacing I pulled the plug. Im too old to be trying to live up to anyones standards (and approval) but my own and my childrens.
Glorious Disappointing Master of the Shaolin Temple For Disappointing-Women-Fu here. I'm an expert trainer of disappointers of women because I have disappointed so many of them. They key is, my son, you must really lean into the disappointment. Go out of your way to disappoint her in strange and inventive ways.
If she asks for a drink of water, throw a banana cream pie in her face. If she asks you to take her out to dinner, put on a chicken costume and dance a mambo. If she asks you to meet her family, dress up like a pirate and speak only as a pirate for the next 7 weeks. Women love disappointment and she will be putty in your hands. OR not. Most likely not. But the key is, you were never going to make her happy anyway so at least you had fun with your disappointments. Glad I didn't help at all.
You need to disappoint a woman early on. If you, like me, are way too friendly and giving in to everything she says, she will slowly lose respect. As soon as she puts you in low value land, and you suddenly start to change behaviour, that’s very upsetting to women, and she might cut you off completely if she can’t receive any value from you anymore.
That’s why I have to keep reminding myself to set boundaries EARLY in the progression of things and take control of my friendlyness. But it’s easier said than done, even though you are doing it with your best intentions to succeed with her, it doesn’t feel like that in the moment.
I agree with this 100%.
Just say no😂
Agree. But on the other hand it feels silly to reject about minuscule things just because I should reject something.
@@fredrikdippel3664i see it as silly too, but they say in the Wire: "The Gane is the Game."
@@fredrikdippel3664 - he isn't saying refuse her EVERYTHING.
He is saying use your own discretion and don't agree to what you don't honestly agree with. Not all Yes or all No. Don't be a pushover or she will lose any respect for you.
This is why we say "just be yourself". Continue doing what you were doing and what you genuinely want to keep doing. She won't magically stop liking you for it.
big ol fax my friend
I find it funny how women will say be yourself but then when you get into a relationship, they want you to be a totally different person.
@@jameslay1489and then when she successfully changed you, she will lose interest and leave you. Remember fellas, just be yourself.
"just be yourself" is the worst advice you can ever give to a person lol.
@@ishitrealbad3039 then be someone else idc
If you want to ruin your relationship, give them everything they want.
Or marry them
Believe it or not this message makes me (and probably other men) less likely to pursue a relationship. Too many unpredictable, frivolous moving parts just to continue qualifying. F**k their wants, desires, & expectations.
see for me this changes everything, this is pretty much the key to the last relationship I had which was extremely painful for the reasons stated in the vid. Get back on the horse, just when they go to walk away, just don't follow them.
Relationships are not worth it. I was a diehard, romantic, and a monogamist. Never again. I’ve learned too many hard lessons. Modern women have no role, they have no direction, and no boundaries slap that on top of being endlessly selfish and you have a recipe for disaster every time, they never take accountability and they don’t believe in self sacrifice. I just have fun with them now they’re basically just accessories at this point. And again this is coming from someone who was searching for the love of his life ever since he was old enough to know what that meant.
@@Trax_travels same here. I was really a great man and really want to treat good my woman. But now I know they are basically never ever satisfy why should I lose my time, energy, money on someone who will never be satisfy…?
Agreed
this attitude won't help you buddy. as humans, we've got the need to make relationships and to satisfy our romantic wants. you should just face the reality of human behavior as it is and live your life based on it
You’re the man, Orion!
The only thing that can give satisfy women is *emotional connection*
You have to make her love doing things for you start small.
Emotional nourishing through emotional intimacy and handling disrespect is crucial.
Really great advice! And beware of women that will simply not accept to be disappointed. They will hold onto it, and scowl at you for weeks, months, years, holding onto that thing so that they make sure you feel punished and never repeat that "offense" ever again. Run away from such women.
Too late. But you’re absolutely right.
This is women emotional aggression what you’re talking about.
That's like every woman. Yes all my exes, mum, and crazy female colleagues (which is almost every one who I've interacted enough) are like that
Or just treat them like a toddler.
How do I successfully detach from such a women especially if I see her at work every day
A woman will never be satisfied, ever, no matter how much you try and give, never.
The best approach? Have fun while you are with her, don't try too hard don't try too little, just the right amount, enjoy every minute you're with her because rest assured she'll leave, enjoy her while she's still here.
That's the biggest red pill in my personal experience and opinion
Wiser than average
❤❤ Absolutely love it!!
Guys don’t say this is wise or that you love it. This is absolutely fucking wrong and an incredible tragedy that this man thinks that. Vicente, women are real people. People lose respect for you over time when you continually disrespect them by thinking of them as less than or that you have to play these weird games. It sounds like this is the real issue for most people in these comments.
@@ProfessorThock I've had several women, I'm talking from experience and from friends and colleagues anecdotes. On top of that you find men online who can rely with what is being said.
You just don't like it because it makes women look bad, well, too bad, they're human beings, and very flawed human beings at that.
A man should never hate women, be he should never pedestalize them either
@@ProfessorThock ? All he's saying is to enjoy the time you have with your woman and don't be a simp. It's sage advice. He didn't say anything about them being less than. He's simply accepted the fact that most relationships end and that the appropriate thing to do is enjoy your time with someone and don't get too attached nor neglect them. There's no logical reason to expect someone to be in your life forever so I don't see any issue with his comment.
40 years of being an agreeable man and I'm learning this...
I knew a bloke who boasted that he never fought with his wife. Translation - he gave in EVERY time.
Nailed it, this is why my marriage ended, I tried to give her everything she wanted within reason and gave everything I could give, when I realized it was never going to be enough and started reigning things in after 11 years, she became more vicious and manipulative than I had ever realized she was capable of. I told her no and stood my ground often, which kept he interested, and fueled my irritation at her lack of satisfaction with my efforts. Lesson, set the boundaries early, don't give more than is reasonable, it won't get you more love or respect, just misery and resentment.
@@yezkex you’re obviously a woman. It would be the stupidest thing possible to sit down and have a conversation about how you “both” (meaning her) want to be loved. That’s literally sitting down to hear her list of demands. The whole point of the video is that you have to disappoint her - you’re willing to provide what you are willing to provide not whatever she wants.
and she can deal with it if she wants to be with you.
@@yezkexLove is an attribute only I have
What if I set boundaries for her and she complains about them and I actually respect her boundaries, what should I do if get into an argument?
@@rdg760jr2 No.. You leave.... Her... Forever... Hypocrisy like this is common and irredeemable
@@rdg760jr2 No explanations needed ... don't be a weakling
Man you just described how my long time relationship ended, I was doing everything and changing who I was to become something that would bring her and closer, and the worst part when it all ended I couldn’t recognize myself anymore, thanks for sharing you knowledge.
Greetings from Brazil.
❤😢
Hey bro just know you‘re not alone, been in the exact same boat as you. Still regret how i couldn‘t hold my own ground. greetings from Germany
Women ☕
espero q as coisas ja tenham melhorado cara, tmj nessa
@@Vrunge90 obrigado amigo, em momentos como esse aprendemos que somos mais fortes do que pensavamos, e saímos deles mais resilientes. Tamo junto!
This is ESPECIALLY harder in Single Mother homes because our relationship personality develops based on keeping a usually narcissistic mom happy....which transfers to girlfriends & wives.
Don’t disrespect moms by generalizing that single moms are narcissists. Maybe yours was but don’t speak for other people. At the end of the day at least one person was there for a 2 person job.
@@callme_t you could've easily kept it moving if this was not about you, but this statement was for those who AGREED, so you can move along and kick rocks✌🏾
@@thaxtonwaters8561 i love this
@@callme_tmine definitely was (and still very much is) narcissistic. The reason there was only “one person for a two-person job” was because she kicked my father out and thought life would be nicer if she just did everything herself.
@@callme_t why is it disrespectful? It's just a clinical term
A woman saying no to me doesn’t make me want her more.
Yeah.. I was gonna say, this too was the only part of his video I disagreed with.
Idk your personality, but generally I've observed, the less your crush(works for both genders) is attracted to you, the more you're attracted to them. Finally if it's a person you never wanted, nothing will happen.
This whole video is dumb
@@anshumannbele4373 Maybe this is just a majority case? Like most ppl being like this. But im right with him, a no makes me want em less
No = no. I can never want someone more if they say NO. To do so would be creepy and needy. If they say no, it's a no
What a weird world we live in for relationships to operate this way…
The toxicity of this mindset is unbelievable ! not at all applicable for real life outside their screens 😂
@@chocolat3698 What are you talking about?
That's because of feminism and social media. It was very different 20 years ago
Doesn't apply to all countries
Relationships have always operated this way……
The king has harems of woman pining after him….. biology dictates survival mechanisms for the entire species… our DNA is encoded to procreate and Protect our bloodlines…. For men this means sexual reproduction with as many females as possible in a short time.
For females this means finding a Suitable Partner to protect offspring, and than another if the suitable partner becomes unable to protect offspring.
We are just as bacteria or the smallest organisms, our innate genetics will dictate our macro behaviors as humans.
Male and female. Opposites and One
Damn, I knew this so well before I got married. 35 years later and I have all but forgotten about this truth. End result is, after loosing myself she is now gone, too. Smh.
wow even after 35 long years..
@@pacha777 It's really sad isn't it, the length really DOES NOT matter when it comes to Women. On the other hand, you have the Sunken Cost Fallacy. The thing is, you only get one life with a limited amount of time in it.
Sorry to hear that. 😞
It's also through disappointment and conflict where you reveal a person's true colors and character.. You're not really learning anything about your partner when everything is sunshine and rainbows. One of the worst things you could do is marry a woman without walking through some fires with her.
Men shouldn't be afraid of disappointing women, including dumping them or feeling bad for not reciprocating their feelings, because life is a series of disappointments and in fact, they need to get to know this while they can still handle it. If it's not you, something else will disappoint them. You can't shield people from disappointments.
It's not easy to kiss the mouth that chews out your ass all day.
@@Ferrari-s8v that's not what he said.
Disappointing a woman or standing up to her, letting her know what your boundaries are and enforcing them is a brilliant way of getting that woman out of your life for good so she can go and jump on a simp who'll never do any of that.
In my experience its the exact opposite. They never last with simps, only with men who respect themselves
@@Jadaks I've heard the same from other men, and I don't doubt your experience. It's that I've only once witnessed what you describe, in a marriage where he took several years to train her to behave properly. I used to know a married woman who admitted to me that it took her husband some time to also train her to behave properly. In the vast majority of the other marriages I've seen, it's clear she doesn't respect her husband, and I guess is only with him for utility, despite him breaking his back for her.
@@Jadaks They don't last with men who respect themselves either, they quickly realize that he won't bend, so they quickly monkey branch.
@Tom-A062 I would disagree with you there. Some woman won't last with men that respect themselves, but im those situations its best that it doesn't last because, to me, that means she isn't looking for a partner, she's looking for someone she can take advantage of. Every GOOD woman I've ever known greatly respects a man that respects himself and is confident in himself.
@@TheMonkeygrunt That's how single women used to behave. They don't any more. What I mainly see around me is women using men, and men seemingly happy to be her servant. I also see men who treat their women like sh1t, and that's also how to keep her around. Respect yourself and be confident in yourself is repulsive to women.
This is humbling for me as a woman because it reminds me of how ungrateful and immature I can be towards my husband. Thank again, Dr!
I'm applauding you, ma'am.
@@animamagna3077simp
A mature women is rare.
So women really do act like spoil kids 😂
As Coach Greg says, “They are not to be pleased!”
Very true. Emotions are fleeting and women have mastered the art of turning cold in an instant once they figured you out. Stay mysterious/distant and cold ( just like all the bad boys) that give them butterflies and you'll last longer than 6 mins in that relationship.
I dated a lot of girls in my teen years from 14yr all the way up. I learned this lesson inside-out by the time I was a few months shy of being 19. It's served me well ever since, especially throughout my current relationship that I've been in for over 14yrs. I've seen family and friends lose women like that, and no matter how much I talk It's like they can't grasp the concept.
They watched too many Disney and Hallmark movies.
Are you married?
I can tell you a lot of it comes purely by instinct and giving in to a sort of manipulative calling from your mind. I've simped and I've done the opposite. Sometimes the simpery comes instinctual, then it works like she wanted that in some twisted way, sometimes the opposite comes instinctually, and she comes running back or vying for attention. It's when I've done things out of thinking and reasoning out that it's been a miss. Like, if i conciously play the game with rules in my mind, it all falls apart. But when I hear to my heart, knowing a certain outcome already if I just tug this way or that, finding out openings in emotional vulnerability almost for a good throw, then it hits.
Thanks
Note that getting used to *disappointing women* has two meanings:
1) The art of disappointing women
2) Acceptibg that women are deceiving in their nature
3) Ending up alone 😂
Initially I read it as get used to women just being disappointing 😂
@@taranjitronaldinhify Same here. And I would fully subscribe to that notion.
Basic life lesson!
That’s some misogynistic thinking
@@ms.altareb9935 Having high expectations of women's
- emotional maturity and
- ethical standards
is "misogynistic"?😲
OK, mea culpa 😥
Until I watched this video, I used to feel bad about constantly disappointing women. Now I know it's a feature, not a bug. Thanks so much!
Haha, a feature indeed!
😂😂😂😂
I've just discovered this channel, now I'm binge watching. You describe all of the problems I have encountered. I have never had problems attracting women, but so often I have either pleased them to the point they lose respect, or I become resentful that all my efforts and time don't elicit the response I was expecting. It's all so clear now 🤦♂️
I used to worry about disappointing women, then I learned to accept it as inevitable, and now I take great pleasure in doing it.
Everyone says they don't understand women, and probably no one fully does, but you, my dude go a long way. Super smart, great advice all consuming is right. Many women say the 6 foot, six-figure salary thing, if that were good enough and they were happy if they got that that'd be fine, but when are they ever happy even if they do get that?
In the beginning of our relationship I told him he was the Captain of the ship and I was 2nd in command. He has yet to disappoint me and we are starting year 14. I am not the typical woman because I want my man to spend time with his friends playing golf or just hanging out. He is not in my life to entertain me 24/7. We blended our lives together and I appreciate our time together. All I want from him is that whichbhe gives freely and I have only one expectation of him and that is he love and take care of himself, because you can't give what you don't have.
You are an exceptional woman!! Your husband is a lucky man. If only all women were like you!! God bless!
Only three months in the relationship, and my girlfriend is like you in this regard.
You are wise woman. Many young ladies are self-absorbed and don't figure this out until it is too late for them.
The software inside her head is equal in importance as your attraction to her. Healthy boundaries and expectations is the key to any relationship. Unfortunately today many women don't take the time to consider what her future husband or boyfriend wants out of a relationship until she's too damaged or it's too late. Guys are conditioned by society to be doormats and women to be entitled this will always end badly
This is how the women I know are. The women he describes - I don't recognize these women at all.
I'm 50 years old, never married but have had my share of women in my lifetime. I've made this mistake before. I sure do wish this golden knowledge were around back in my day. No men ever dropped wisdom like this to me or anyone I know. Young men, take note of these videos! Learn from the mistakes of others. The worst mistake you can make is to believe that women think like men and that just because you would or wouldn't do something that they would or wouldn't. Every man I know has been cheated on and none of them saw it coming.
i’m 23, ty for your comment. i’m taking notes
I've been watching videos like this for a few years now and it occurred to me awhile back that women are screwed. You can't put this information back in the bottle. Men from every corner of the globe young and old have come together to crack the code. The internet isn't going away. Just think about what it's going to be like in one hundred years when every guy is well educated in female bullshit by the time they are 20. I honestly think we are watching the dynamics between men and women change forever in real time.
That is true I am 51 and men believe women are all sugar and spice. They ain't. Sure still good women out there but Vet them. Many are selfish because they have it too easy and dont work for it. They just rock up here I am 😆
Mid 50’s married one and divorced…wished I had this knowledge in my 20’s
We had this knowledge, but we ignored it. We wanted to hold onto that woman. I've done it. We all have. It's part of life. Oddly, I don't regret it. I had some good and bad memories.
Thanks!
i wished i had this advice given to me 20 years ago when i was a young man. after being in a long relationship and finally getting married, i just realise how true this advice is. women’s love is quite selfish as they want everything from you. all your time, all your attention and especially, all your money.
Absolutely true. I was in my zone. Confident, healthy, deep well of will power. Making money, friends, nothing could get under my skin. Met the love of my life who just wanted me to, "lighten up". I thought i reached the point where I could... Relationship was over in 6 months and I was left weak, pathetic, with nothing. A woman is like getting a pay check for your labor. Just because you got paid and can pay rent, doesn't mean you quit your job.
3:47 “If it ain’t broke don’t fix it, My Dude”😂
This is great advice, no one is obliged to stay with you, so make sure there will be enough of you left in you if the relationship ends.
Gold 🏆
This literally was made at the perfect time. I'm so grateful I learned something important
honestly i wish i found this a few weeks earlier cuz it already might be too late for me but imma try
I am a woman and I binge watch all of your videos so I can be better. If a woman wants too bad enough she will do what it takes. Good women are out there guys but the best partner is the one in the mirror. ❤
We need more women like you.
Meaning women do the chasing
Women are not complicated. They are simply untrustworthy. Fact of nature.
It's not about being good or bad ,its not your fault I guess , a women doesnt necessarily puts effort to become like this , it sort of a byproduct of being programmed the way we are
@@ajaynair2636right , I just wrote about that above !, how affection slowly seems to dissipate once the purpose is fulfilled. Honestly the way we're living and have lived there only seems one way to have lasting relation , which is to talk about these things , know that you aren't programmed for eternal love but still making concious efforts towards keeping each other happy, knowing we all desire the same thing to and fulfilling that for each other , and that we're together in this mystery.
You are spitting nothin but facts my bro. I hope some people get this, i’ve been in a bunch of relationships and the ones where the woman was most attracted to me were the ones I was able to disappoint them. Make them feel like I didn’t care as much but it’s a give and take. I gave the most when she was good to me, and the second I smelt funny shit I switched real quick. thank you for the video !
Nice guys who give her everything normally finish last. While some women will keep going back to the bad boys because they are addicted to the emotional rollercoaster of the highs and lows (i.e. disappointment). Do not be boring as this will not excite her and leave her feeling dead inside. Feminine love is consumptive so keep feeding her that spice.
Stop thinking in "nice" and "bad" - that's the first mistake. Be more nuanced. Think of what would make you compatible with the woman you desire and admire. Think of a few hundred positive aspects of a person and his habits which you can offer, and who would appreciate them? Don't give them for free to just anyone, but somebody deserving. It can be simple things, like; you can dance, give a creative compliment, and be polite around her grandma, but also deeper things, like your faith and values, your capacity achieve long term goals, keep promises, and learn new difficult things - or in between; you can handle a household, you can handle a Sunday afternoon, you can support your spouse when she is upset about work-trouble, you can handle a garden or house upgrade? Can you share a budget? Can you prioritize, both your, and her, and your common needs, for the long haul? Can you keep your spirit up and preserve good cheer in everyday and crises? Our do you risk to be the man that goes for a football match with buddies, when she risks to go into labor or a collapse under sleepless nights with a colicky baby?
@@DNA350ppm This one sounds worried that men are waking up. Sure, a man can and should be helpful and fatherly in a family ... but he STILL must be be able to handle female nature.
@@braneenie Oh no, I love men waking up, men are so covertly oppressed! But not by women in the first place, but by the demands on men, that as a corollary has that men have a distorted view on women and what women are, want, and need. When men use women as part of the arsenal by which they impress on other men, then everything gets scewed in relationships.
@@DNA350ppm dude, not being rude, just blunt. this red pill masculine whatever you're into - you sound as a crazy as a crazy feminist. for real, (again, not being rude, believe or not) check in with yourself what is dogma from these yt ppl etc and what ideas, in your gut, and feel right. To you. now i've been burned more by women than anything so i know the feels but this is looking like you let it mess you up vs show you the pain that was there before you even knew what a girlfriend is, (IFS is the only therapy that works so try that first. all the modalities that you know suck, do actually suck, i've done it all, IFS is something special)
I like good, that doesn't apply to everyone
This is the best relationship advice on YT - so many true and actionable golden nuggets in one short video. Thank you!
You should never Give anyone your all wether you’re male or female...also never ever let anyone try and change you
This is so true!! My ex (over 20 years ago) totally lost interest because I worshiped her too much. I'm the opposite with my current wife, and she is super attracted to me even after 15 years of marriage. Man I wish I had known this principle of human behavior in my early 20's.
Can you give examples of wdym by "opposite"
Women want what they can't get,
Women want what other women have
A good plan if you like to be unhappy.
That's the same for everybody
@@macrickNo it isn't. Men overall aren't group thinkers even if there's comformists.
Women want what other women want (especially men) since it secures the success of their offspring.
@@edheldudeMen are group thinkers too. Why do you think revolutions happen on a large scale ? The only thing is men can survive being a lonewolf while women can't.
@@anshulguptain yeah i think it's probably on a spectrum which is dependent on multiple factors. But generally speaking, it's safe to say women are more collectivist and conformist than men.
The only time my wife was 100% into me was when we were dating and she knew I had side pieces.
🎯🎯🎯🎯 "the best type of relationship is when the woman is just a little insecure"- Patrice O'Neal. She knew she had to be on her pees and cues.
Ooooo😮
Bro I swear to god I think all women are like this. Same thing thing with my wife, she was OBSESSED with me when I had 9s and 10s chasing me around. I was the better looking partner and she was more like a 7/8 on the looks scale.
But I ended up choosing her instead of the 9s and 10s because I figured hey the less prettier one will be the least likely to be tempted to cheat. Well turns out she cheated anyway with an absolute loser coworker. It didn’t last for more than 1 month before she couldn’t stand him.
Now she wants me back LOL! Women truly are atrocious decision makers. Yes some women are intelligent and not like this but the vast majority are.
@@erko78 that’s my story and I may have been cheated on with some beta
I blocked her man do the same
@@erko78
You probably know by now that less attractive women are actually MORE likely to cheat, due to lower self-esteem and greater insecurity.
You hit the nail on the dot. It's sad for me. I found this out after the age of 25. However, I learned not to give women everything they wanted, and somehow, I found more women being drawn to me. Maybe I just had to grow up and have more self-respect. I feel great now. It took me so long to figure all this out
@@davidsf101 dude 25 is still young..go ahead and never lose your self respect
Wow how are you still alive at 25, respect
Man, I've learned so much after my wife said she's leaving. I would not have grown AT ALL, staying in that relationship.
So bizarre, so bizarre.
There is a limit. When I get rejected too much my attraction declines.
Well, that's what he meant by the spices analogy.
Love yourself first. Work on yourself, build a body, have a nice car (maintain it). Learn new skills/hobbies. Women get attracted to men who are happy and stable.
@@WhiteWolfos happy and stable... Word 🤔😎
It sounds like that's your perception of your attraction after repeated failings. Just remind yourself that's not how the world outside of your mind is viewing you. The world has no idea. But if you keep thinking that about yourself, you'll naturally give off that negative energy, and carry your body in a way that might tell them. Then they'll treat you accordingly (which is not a good thing). Take it all in stride, and keep trying. That's what I do. Success comes when you least expect it. Just maintain positive energy. Save the sulking and licking your wounds for when you're alone in private or hanging with your most trusted boys.
I agree everything you said. This has been proven already by Psychology. Be the guy that she complains about but never leaves than she gets bored and cheats on you.
Saying no jeopardized my marriage. Just wanting to be safe and protect us financially got me discarded. Now I'm alone
Was there a way to negotiate? In a healthy relationship both partners should be able to meet somewhere in the middle to come to a resolution.
You lost a "shared fantasy" not a real love.
If she loved you, she would have understood and stayed together. You will find a better woman. Note that she.probably did not loved you, but she loved what YOU could give to her. You dodged a bullet, a good woman will cate and support for you, and dont dump you if you refuse what she wants (in the moment)
Sounds like you stopped having fun with her due to wanting to save more money. There has to be a balance. The couple that has fun together stays together. Assuming both people value integrity.
I feel you. I can't speak to safe but I can speak to finances. Women don't want to help you to have money. They want someone who already has money. Then they want to spend it. Keep being careful with your money. Build some assets. As you know, money makes money. Then you will have more money to spend also. When you have more money you will be attractive to women. Find one who can live with your boundaries. Make it clear at the beginning that you will never spend more than you make or never spend more than you make minus some savings. It may be hard to find someone like that but they are out there.
I mean, i dunno. When a woman told me no, i got less interested clearly. This whole "the harder to get the more you want it" menatlity is just fundamentally toxic and miserable in my experience...
Agreed.
Hahahahaha wow way to completely miss the point
Yeah, you got disinterested clearly because you weren't that interested in the first place. A threshold amount of attraction/interest is required for this thing to work.
Same here..I don't have time or interest for their dramas
@@farooqkeita700which is
This kind of presentation is really great because it doesn’t seem to be polarized for or against men and women. These are just straight facts and they are useful.
The bit near the end of the video where he says, to paraphrase: regardless of whether it should or shouldn't be that way, that's the way it is. That is applicable to so many things in life.
knowing she will never be happy relieves the guilt of eventually "no meeting her expectations". it frees you to be who you are and make the mistakes you will make, because its inevitable
Thanks!
5:47
“Women like to test how much they can get away with.”
So Damn True. Most Truest Words Ever. The thing is it doesn’t just apply to Women-Only. It applies to Humanity as a whole in General.
It paints women as she-devils that are out to exploit the poor, innocent hardworking men. However, both men and women tend to test how much they can get away with. Men will do it to women just the same.
men too
Wanting is free. It costs the wanter nothing to want things but it costs you the giver something to give things.
profound. I think it's that coating being applied on that "want" -of suffering. Because you don't give-they suffer/feel unjust > which makes the giver feel bad for not giving. And 'feeling bad for' is where it all starts falling down. Emotional manipulation which demands some tactics to acquire the antidote for it..
Long-term relationship ended because of giving too much love. 11 years.
Learnt a hard lesson and now after 4 years it turns out this is a generic psychology. Weirdly accurate.
Lost 20 years of marriage because I refused to give up my dreams. She dumped me brutally and humiliating way.
Same here, 15 yrs
Billions of humans on earth, patterns are nature.
Therefore it is good sense to study the psychology of Human relations before entering into them seriously.
As humans we are just as plants or animals, natural, instinctual, and human… running off emotions and Survival mechanisms ingrained for thousands of years.
@@marguskiis7711if your dream is humane, then your ex is devil's incarnate...
Honestly, back when I was single, I had the most success with women when I didn’t really care what they wanted. It’s a strange world we live in.
Absolutely.
Love itself is the bare minimum. Everything else we do for each other is extra and should be cherished. A flower from your lover should be worth a million from your friend. If you’re expecting everything and more from the person you are with, you are a problem.
“We never go on dates” starts taking them out once a month “we only go on dates once a month” starts taking them out weekly “you never buy me random gifts” starts buying them random gifts “it doesn’t count because I asked” “don’t you think there’s other guys out there who wouldn’t struggle to give me the bare minimum?”
Flashback to a time when “all I wanted was you”
If you’re not satisfied with love itself, you don’t deserve it. A person who loves you will give and do anything they can. Without feedback, that may take shape in ways you don’t expect or don’t even see. But if you’re unwilling to see what a person does for you, you’re never going to be happy, no matter how much more they do for you. You’re still unwilling to see it. So you’re never going to register in your head that they are indeed doing things for you.
If the love is worthless to you, you don’t deserve it.
Could not have found this man at a better time in my life!
Rejection and disappointment are spices to people with low I.Q, low self esteem, and masochists. Normal person moves on to a partner that is interested. It's called having dignity.
bingo..this is the comment i was looking for
dude abides
I'm so glad someone said this!
The only women who are attracted to men that reject and dissapoint them are women who grew up with a father figure who rejected and dissapointed her.
Mature women with healthy self esteem prefer partners who treat them with kindness and respect.
well, by the bell curve you could literally say 60% of the entire population is not really that specially, only 23% are lucky enough to have a little bit more IQ, than the average John Doe, while basically the upper 2.5% are not interessted in people, because high IQ indivduals are often isolated or alone.
@@sad_wrangler8515 More like 15% are in a range between z +1 and z+2. And ignorance is a choice regarding one's placement on bell curve.
I can not thank u enough. Now everything makes sense in my life. I have applied ur wisdom and 100% assure that ur words are correct.