My cope is summed up best by a quote: “Chase butterflies and you’ll never catch them. Build a garden and then they’ll come. Even if they don’t, you’ll have your garden”
People don't want to be with somebody who. needs someone else to complete themselves or their life. Build a great life, and someone will want to be a part of it with you.
You don't even need to cope, just get off the dating apps and cold approach multiple women (kind of like what you're describing). If they show disinterest, move on immediately. Save yourself the time and energy and her the creep factor. Also, it depends on how much you vibe with a chick (sometimes ones you know)
I found this very interesting. Especially re the attractiveness characteristics. I'm surprised there isn't more difference between the INITIAL high correlation toward finding youth and classic things like a given face highly attractive -- and what happens after some time when one comes to KNOW someone re their attitudes, beliefs, intelligence, sense of humor, etc. I'm 65. And yeah, it's genetic to initially find beautiful 20ish year old women highly attractive. But since I was working at age 22, after attending college around LOTS of silly and immature women, I found LOTS of women who were 30 to 35 and in shape and reasonably attractive but not "beautiful" FAR more attractive than the vast majority of the early 20's immature women/girls, especially once I got to know them a bit. I'm also surprised this attraction to more mature but still attractive women didn't show up more for men, but maybe I'm even weirder than I assumed I was...
This comment initiated a brain-spasm for me, arriving at a strong explanation for this: 1. Men's sexual urges peak much earlier than women's do (this is well-known among sexologists). 2. The perception of our own attractiveness is largely determined by the amount of undesired romantic attention we get, not the desired romantic attention. 3. People's understanding of the world around them revolves most strongly around lessons learned early. 4. The sexdrive asymmetry causes young women to fend off oversexed young men, during their late formative years, which then turns into a persistent overestimation, even when they themselves are the ones being turned down later on. This logically sums up why mediocrely attractive women overestimate their attractiveness: It's mostly a timing issue, though there's also the fad of women telling young girls that they're beautiful - which is quite harmful if you think about it; not only instilling false expectations but also a shallow sense of self-worth.
BS. Everyone suffers from self-doubt and a lot of people are compensating. Most dudes who COULD be kind of attractive don't want to put in the effort. Having a crappy personality makes you unnatractive to women as well. I'd say given your attitude towards women, most women find you unattractive.
@@AGHathaway Actually, my attitude towards women is just fine, I'm happily married and you're projecting your political bias - which I don't have. I mentioned it's a timing issue, not a "women are stoopid issue" or whatever your polarized mind turned it into.
I think a lot of dudes are telling girls they're hot, there's no girls telling an average dude he's hot lol Just the way it is, their horniness sets them up for delusions. Who knows if it's even a net positive though, the confidence itself is a good trait to have, but when it's too much it's definitely unattractive and comes off as crazy.
Pro tip. If a girl is interested in you, they'll make it very easy early on. Don't try to 'earn' your way into their heart (aka work your way out of friend zone). Tried this when I was younger and it led to a long term world of pain and heart ache. Girls who were interested in me back then made life easy and were open to me emotionally and physically.
Yes and no. It depends on a lot of factors, such as cultural background, mental state and a lot more. While for the most part, what you said is true, the truth always lies in the grey zone, it`s never black or white.
Yes, if a woman is into you, she does everything to get you into her life. Just like guys do. If a woman is not into you, you may get to somewhere with her, but she never ever will love you sincerely. In that case you are just a temporaly solution to her.
True. The tall and very good looking guys I know, you can clearly see how easy they make it for them. As long as they are not broke, it's smooth sailing.
Treat life as a game and spend time with women, for gathering moments.. not for future expectations.. you will definitely enjoy it.. I, once went to a movie with a girl, 3 years above my age on a bike.. which I thought was impossible in my life.. one more thing to say, girls also have a dirty mind. They just don't share it with anyone.. if you are able to open it.. you may get what you need... 👉👌
@@Novusod What I have always found weird in women's friendships is that they will lie to each other all the time. I never understood it. Like "no, youre so pretty!" to their friend Gorlox the destroyer type person. My friends literally point out to me ive gained weight and im just like "ah sh*t, true" and I go back to the gym.
The chart #4 at 6:40 is actually devastating. If you're working in labor or services, you're actually less attractive than not working at all. Makes you realize why no one wants to work these jobs today. They're less than not appreciated; they're a negative effect on your status as a man.
And yet this is not true for women. Even though it happened decades ago I still remember a gorgeous woman who waited on me at a Macs. I would have taken a shot except I was with another woman.
The attractiveness/age correlation statistics hide a phenomena: the MOST attractive men do peak at 37, but the vast majority of men tank in their 30s, putting on a beer belly and losing muscle, which drives the average curve down.
@@rafaelamorim3527every men can age like fine wine. But most mens have shitty routines, habits and dont know how to take care for him self. If they would prioritize sleep, food, working out, skincare and mental health and stop doing their bad habits, it would easily double most men’s attractiveness
Wow. The timing of me seeing this video couldnt be more perfect, I was with a narcissist for 4 years, and when we stopped seeing each other, i found the love of my life, and because i was trauma bonded, i ended up ruining things but i realized my mistake and did all i could to make sure i got her back.
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i am in a similar situation, and i do not know what else do to have her back, i have been dying inside, people actually think i am happy, i am not
I feel your pain , after trying out the no contact experiment that failed miserably, i had to find other means, i had to reach out to a spiritual adviser, it was brilliant idea which i never thought it was, but it worked wonders for me
as a 27 year old virgin. Out of all my 6 best buddies I grew up with, they are all also absolute virgins +- 2 years my age. Everyone with their own place to rent, stable job and at least 4 of us are not obese lol. I can tell what lead to this tho. -None of us ever gained any visible muscle at all and I wouldnt exactly recommend modeling to anyone either. -Most of us work in tech, went to school in tech, studied in tech, so > or < 0 female friends or contacts built over the years. -We never went to drinking parties either. -We gamed a lot, so even less time spent in public. I think if I had to actually try avoiding women any harder, I wouldnt know what more I could do heh. I think clueless type of guys like us only avoided extinction historically because we got carried by arranged marriage honestly.
Yes, which was smarter than today. Dating is a scam and people fell for i. You need to spend a bunch of time and resources for it while time ago it was easy since you got someone anyway and back than all women where nice and beautiful
@@danicruz226cause they aren't problems. It's the path for success, while playing around leads to pregnancies when you aren't even capable of providing. What is he supposed to change? The dating market of the west itself is the only reason for the population collapse. This is why arranged marriages used to exist.
@@danicruz226 Have you ever heard people say "I'm going to start going to the gym this year, and lose some weight as my New Year's resolution!"? That's basically the reason. Establishing the habit of doing things with other people requires time, effort, and satisfying pre-requisites. It's not a switch you turn on, it's a full-blown lifestyle change. And people like me tend to be both reactive to the environment, as well as having a history where our ability to initiate and follow through on plans has been paralyzed by training. for example, it's easy to know that I should "reach out to people" or "join a club", but then I walk outside, and look around, and think "Well this is boring, what am I even doing here", and then turn around, walk back inside, do a search, click through the top few website results, fail to find something that looks good, and then get distracted by a youtube video, or a tutorial, or a book, or some video games, or netflix, or professional development, or a remote job, etc... And then there's the issue that meeting people requires you to know people, or be introduced, or know where to find people on a regular basis in a way where you can be friends. the longer you've been away from that, the more difficult it becomes to get plugged back in. You just loop the same day, over and over, as the years pass by.
Your daily reminder that the goal of Dating websites is NOT to find you a partner. Their goal is to MAKE MONEY. Dating sites actively benefit from pairing you with bad matches so that you stay and pay longer.
Eh, it is possible to have two goals at the same time, and more, but of course there can only be one at the top of the list but it's of course connected/related. You must be American, as only Americans can only see one side of the story.
1) If men could go on the sites and get laid in a day, every single man would be permanently signed up, looking for the next lay. 2) The dating sites cannot influence female choice, which is the only real bottleneck to mating.
I'm in my 50s now, and looking back I can say that I got WAY more attention from women of all ages in the decade 35-45 than at any other stage of life.
Absolutely, 35-45 is truly men's prime. The fallacy with the study is that it doesn't take into account that women in their late 20s and early 30s become exponentially more desperate to find a partner while still looking for men older than themselves which results in dating becoming much easier for men between 35-45.
I think what some fail to realize is that while growing up, girls get dating advice (what we should want in a man, and what a man expects us to be) from that larger group of women that only chase that top small group of men, and that screws up our perception of what our goals should be. Crap from women’s magazines, Disney Princess fantasies, rom coms… only to realize Prince Charming is nowhere to be found. When I took dating more seriously, loosened my expectations, and asked men what they actually want… they were much easier to please than I thought and some of the best bachelors were hidden gems you wouldn’t consider at first. I realized I was brainwashed. Women blame pornography for men’s supposed preferences, but truly, men won’t reject your company if you’re good company 😅
Truth Porn has nothing to do with anything real. We only interact with porn cause our urges get really bad, like when really hungry for food. The urge is constant and what you gonna do, you can’t focus on work if you don’t relieve it, your mind is clouded by it. It’s got nothing to do with reality and people we want to connect to..
Interesting fact - when women judge the attractiveness of strangers - the dustribution is very skewed (only 15% of men are judged as better than average) but when they judge men they know from their social circle the distribution becomes normal. So if you're not in that top 15% of attractiveness you're much better off looking for love in your peer group.
That tracks with the charts he showed though right? A random person is more likely to be a hookup whereas someone in your social circle is more likely to be something long-term.
remember though, not every fits the median or is relevant to 2 unique people. We've all had the hots for someone we can't explain why, and it's not the type you'd typically be interested in.
That's probably just because they don't want to be rude towards them, kinda like how they tell their girlfriend Gorlox the Destroyer that she's beautiful, perfect and that she don't need to change in any way. It's just them avoiding conflict.
Finally someone with some common sense. I'll give everyone here a little secret: women are attracted to men who are busy with their own lives and could take them or leave them. Nothing is more unattractive to a woman than a man who's building his life around trying to attract women.
And in the modern day, they only behave well if there aren't excess resources going around. The only checks on women are when they actually need men, or socially there is shaming for restriction. Notice the west passes neither test.
A rancorous divorce definitely stopped my desire for relationship seeking. One of my attractive female colleagues said to me that if I keep dressing the way I do, that I would never find another girl. I commented back, "Thank God, my plan is working."
@@flynnk70 Real answer. Like an absolute slob. There are a couple of other things to mention. My colleague wasn't trying to be snarky. We've known each other for years. Additionally, she is quite the stylish dresser and the few times I saw her husband, he is kept stylish - not sure if that is his practice or hers. She has seen me when I have been dressed up and knows that I look nice. Baggy pants or shorts. Old t-shirts with logos. Beat up tennis shoes. Perhaps ultra-ultra-comfy sliding into slobbishness.
While these statistics may be correct, as a woman, I recognise myself as an outlier. I'm deeply suspicious of overly attractive men, and a bit the same about high-earning men. I know I'm not alone in this. Equally, lots of women (me included) don't care at all about a man's height. We all need to remember that finding suitable partners is the search for one person (or a few people over a lifetime) who are a good fit. If you look at the people who actually get married or into exclusive/long term relationships, there are a lot of ugly poor people making each other pretty happy.
Most men view your views on women. Most good looking men want good looking women. The women want best looking mem but don't realize best looking men don't want 4's 5's or 6's. Men that are 4's 5's or 6's would feel satisfied with an equal woman in looks and status is honestly more important in probobly wealthier men. Men don't care too much about a womans status. We want someone to make us feel happy. The older we get (me) the less I care about looks. The quality of a woman on the inside matters more
i care about being with a man taller than me. I tried dating a short man, and it was not for me. I also like men that I am attracted too, and I like men who make good money doing honest work. I don't know any woman in my friends group who wants someone they are not attracted to physically, nor do i know any woman in my friends group that wants a man shorter than them. We can only hope the physically attractiveness comes with an honorable soul.
the reason they peak at that age is cuz they already had prior experience ffs lol dont think there'll be some blessing from the heavens that turns you into the rizzler at your 25th birthday
It is the average, does not reflect your specific case and a big bunch of men are as attractive (or unattractive) as you at this age. The most important thing inst age at all, but how you look at this age; I guess men at this age just happen to be more physically fit and corrected skin issues they may have had in the pas
@DewiSant-o3y I mean if you aren't physically active people won't be attracted to you. Either find an easy high pay low hour job that allows you to dedicate 20 hours in the gym every week, or work a 50 hour a week job with low pay that keeps you in killer shape. I chose to be poor af and stay in shape. I miss money but the brainpower that comes with muscles is worth it on a karmic transcendental level. Still would rather be able to afford to live lmaooo. thats why im voting kamal
I think the golden age for men is between 25 and 40. If a man eat healthy, works out, and doesn’t have hair loss, he can still look good and be attractive past his 40s.
You are right about eating healthy food and working out but you all need to stop obsessing over hair loss, it's not that big of a deal. Men like Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statam are considered to be absolute chads. A woman with small tits can still be super attractive, same goes for bald men.
yeah, looks will only get their attention, but your overall status, personality, money situation, etc is what determines if she will keep seeing you or not.
Looks don't take u far if the girl is at your level w looks or higher. But if she's even 1 or 1.5 below (10 scale) oh boyy looks give u wings my friend 🪽 those women will even say they'll "wait for you' if you say emotionally u can't commit 🤫
@@zerocal76 any woman that thinks she is over 5 in looks thinks she looks better than any male and he needs to prove himself to her with status and a nice willing personality,bradpit gets woman far more than billgates because he is better looking,
There is difference if women want a man for their money, or she wants a man to be able to provide for her to raise a family. Women are like snakes, they will hear what man wants in relationship and they will try to trick you by telling you what you want to hear. In that case she will be desperate to fill those expectation but not because she wants it, but because she wants to keep you committed to her. In that case she will be unhappy, and eventually she will divorce you and give up, even if you have kids together.
@@Zemlja_je_ravna "For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword." -Proverbs 5:3-4
That last graphic comparing male and female homosexual couples is super insightful, and adds weight to the idea that women grow unhappy within a couple faster than guys. Certainly food for thought. Thanks for putting together all that information.
I generally agree with the divorce graph, however one thing to keep in mind is that because of current divorce laws women are often net takers in a divorce, which makes divorce a somewhat more palatable option for them. Women get primary custody of children far more often, get spousal and child support far more often, typically contribute less to marital wealth and thus get cash they didn't work for, and more often get to remain in the marital home. Because of this, the downside risk for a woman in a divorce is far less.
This is why usually men are the one who ask women to marry them. If hookup culture has high risks for women, bc they might end up getting pregnant and 100% responsible for being the caregiver and the breadwinner for that family; divorce culture present a higher risk for men, since a lot of the families still see the man as the breadwinner and the woman as the caregiver exclusively. However, the risk is always higher for women when there's children involved: if the woman used to have a job and has a kid, there's a high chance she'll live her job at least in the first 2-5 years of the kid, if not forever, which creates a huge experience gap in a woman's career and makes her financially dependent to men, or, at least, it becomes more difficult for her to get a job. I think it's only fair that if men can call their's a child to who they contributed 1% into growing, women can call their's their husband's belongings as well.
@mujtabaalam5907 Agreed. I can't find any other reason that explains this other than women are generally more emotional and thus more likely to initiate divorce. If anything, same-sex females should have even higher chances of divorce.
The entire video refers to ONLINE dating and in reality, only to clicking but not to who really ends up with who. You should point that out more clearly. It's not what most people are interested in life. They don't wanna hook up with someone new all the time. They want to find a person they can see regularly, so it's more about how to be attractive for 3rd and 4th date. Stats will change massively. There's also data for this.
But as previously said, online dating IS reality. It's the reality now. Most couples start off online. And their online habits affect their irl habits as well. And they don't have to want to hook up with someone new all the time. Wanting to hook up with someone new every once in a while is enough to ruin any relationship, which is why it's much more difficult to have a healthy relationship lately. Relationship quality tanked with the advent of online dating. Who really ends up with who is also affected by online dating, because women end up with some dude that doesn't come even close to her online dating induced fantasies, and she'll never be happy with that guy, dooming the relationship in the short to mid term.
@@mrkiky still, the relative importance of the traits shown in the video are different outside of online dating. If I pay for a prostitute, I'll also look less for a high IQ compared to looks.
Lori Gottlieb is the best-selling author of "Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough." There's a study in the book where men and women are asked, "If you got 80 percent of everything you wanted of your ideal traits in a mate or partner would you be happy?" The majority of women said, "No, that's settling," and the majority of men said, "Eighty percent? I'd be thrilled; that's a catch. Men and women were asked, if they had any deal-breakers for going on a second date, what would those be? And men named three. If she's cute enough ... warm and kind ... and interesting enough to talk to, she gets a second date. Women named 300 things that would rule out a guy for a second date and we are talking about like another two hours and may be a free dinner and they wouldn't do it and there were things like "he wore a brown belt with black shoes or we were having a really good time and i thought he was cute and he was interesting but then he did this Austin Powers impression and i just can't get that out of my mind and i can't go out with him again." This was in 2010 when dating apps and social media weren't big.
Okay, I realize I sound like an ass but young men, listen to me. Stop seeking affection from women that don't want you. First, get yourself financially ahead, second, get yourself healthy, third, get yourself a passport and travel some. You will change as a man once you start travelling and seeing how the world still works outside of the cesspool of relationships that The West. I don't care what you look like unless you are obese. Obese is a deal killer, everything else? There women out there that will find you as a possibility. If you are obese, yes, I was obese to be for years, got tired of being fat, don't waste your time with anything but intermittent fasting and some modest regular activity like walking, cycling, bball or formal exercise and time/body will fix it.
I used to work with a guy who was great looking, had great hair, also a serial cheater, pregnant wife, smart as a brick, affair w/a co-worker, professionally unsuccessful (and eventually failed out of the business). Women would throw themselves at him, and even discuss what their babies would look like. I had him beat in every category but looks, and I was single and not a cheater/player. Although I could certainly get dates, the women didn't throw themselves at me like they did at this guy.
He was a serial cheat BECAUSE women threw themselves at him. IMO most men are not cheaters because of lack of access, not because they have better self control. Few have the willpower it takes to deny endless attractive females wanting a one night stand.
you are a cheater/player....or at least you wish you could be. Inferred by, "women don't throw themselves at me"....what is to be gained from women themselves at you? Stoke your ego? get to play the field with multiple women, feel like a boss cause you spread your dna and diseases?? You are just as bad as the players....if you had the looks or the rizz...you would do the same.
The chart about profession is definitely spot on. When I joined the military I had a girl I was friends with comment about my uniform. She said, "that poor uniform..." I asked her what she meant, and she replied, "Its going to be all over the floor when I am done with you." That was definitely a confidence boost I wasn't expecting that day. 😆 Service, hospitality, and labor being so low is kind of unfortunate though. Those people are the backbone of society. People thank me for my service all the time, but its these people who have my thanks. And I truly mean that, as I've gotten older, and my previous career has taken its toll, these people have been a Godsend.
@@NelsonGuedes If you are good for society then you are an outlier and people hate outliers, they hate their betters. Society is a giant bucket of crabs.
Even profession is subjective. Since I don't make any distinction between a soldier and a serial killer, I would never get involved with a military man no matter how jacked they are. I don't support war pigs in politics or dating. Values trumps appearance.
It is a good question because the numbers of these lowest are more than the higher? How do they reproduce? So, his figures are mostly about hookups which are just a ruinous part of the fake freedoms your slave masters conjure up. There will be more and more subservients and less lawyers even although the standards are much lower today , I've read the difficulty of university has dropped over 20x since 1960.
Dating an attorney / lawyer was the most stupidest thing I ever did. Never date anybody who wants to be right all the time, has the mental arsenal to win every argument, and - in the end - can even use their job against you professionally. I'd like to hear from women who find lawyers attractive why they do. (In my case, the lawyer was the woman, so maybe male lawyers are different.)
Maybe I'm just being vulgar, but some people will just think the other person as a wallet so it doesn't matter what spew out of their mouth as long as the money flows.
The status of telling her girlfriends how her man is the big, big lawyer guy. The status of him always being well-dressed and of course the perceived high salary. Other to that job: doctor (healer), firefighter (real man), police man (good guy + fit + uniform) and pilot (traveller) are the archetypical jobs women love to see. Not to forget CEO of something (commanding people while earning a looooot).
Just to drive home the point; law is a career that attracts Psychopaths and narcisists. As does politics. (No surprises there). So the chances of getting a really troubling person are higher.
I was astonished that the most attractice occupation to women was lawyer! I never would have guessed. What we didn't see on the chart was that the most attractive occupations to women seem to be: - Royalty. (Which a man can't change) - Acting - Music, particularly singing. - Sport Just so long as THEY ARE VERY SUCCESSFUL IN THE OCCUPATION. LIKE "RICH". I don't think struggling actors or musicians, even if exceptionally good, get much attention.
@@stephenhosking7384 That's not correct. Depending on your age, you can absolutely struggle and women will be greatly interested. They don't care too much for the money if you're "rich" like you believe. It's about the perceived status. Top jobs are: doctor, firefighter, pilot. Those are the maximum prestige jobs, but they are relatively rare. A not-so-rare "job" is CEO or business founder. Let's say you're 35, you get to know a women your age and she asks what you do for a living. Telling her you just founded a company 3 months ago, you work very much and hard and it's just you working as UX/UI designer for example, designing internet pages and you don't have any employees. Do it. Will change your perception 180 degrees. She will basically jump at you. Just being rich inheritance won't help you at all with the average minded woman out there. On the very contrary. They will ENVY you. You didn't deserve to be rich. Therefore you are a crook! Or tell her you are a trader and multimillionaire already, because of Crypto. This is so massively unattractive to women, you could show up with a Porsche and they still will resent you, because they think of you as a speculator veeeeery badly Better tell her you're an addicted drug dealer then tell her you're a successful trader. Trust me.
The way I have seen dating lately is the importance of looking for girls interested in you. I still fall for wanting the hot girl but have began to go for girls that have interest in me. I realized that as a dude, there are probably women out there that really like you that you never pay attention to. The best advice that I got was a chaperone in a trip I went to, "be friends with everyone around you. Make experiences with them not for the sake of just hooking up, but getting to know them as a person. It really sets up for good relationships." Most people I know in relationships started off as friends and have all led to good long term relationships. Dating is really finding someone interested in you that you have interest back. That takes time.
My wife was loveliest in her 20s and hottest in her 40s. In our sixties we laugh a lot together, Find a love in your 20s- make it work. You may have to travel. Toys and "freedoms" are dust.
I was very annoyed when I saw I homeless women in California talking about her homeless boyfriend, while I was a doctor, living on the Mediterranean, and couldn't get a girlfriend.
Thank you for the stats, now I can give a powerpoint presentation when I tell my family I have given up on dating and they'll just respond with "you'll be fine"
And then there’s the outliers. I’m 47 and in the best shape of my life. Happily married for 13 years and getting told I’m aging like fine wine. I get more attention than I ever did in my thirties
Women also have a "what does he have that's so good?" mentality. Also when a guy is in a relationship women see it as a pre - screened guy as woman tend to trust each others approval.
I believe no one peaks. Unless there's a disfiguring accident or illness, the genetic attractiveness will decide everything as long as you take care of yourself. A naturally more attractive 50 year old will always be above others of the same age.
The chart about females vs males max attractiveness is a good base, but still not showing the full truth. If men were completely free to choose without any legal and societal restrictions, they would choose even younger females partners as other, older data has shown. Still, great video again and keep up the awesome work!
I'm an autistic guy that might be in the top 5%. I've never really been that interested in women, I mean I'm straight but I've never been into hookups. I like video games more. But videos like this really explain why I've had such a hard time interacting with other men my whole life. Looks matter a lot more than I'd like to admit to myself. The girls that fell for me probably didn't fall for me because of my 'amazing personality'
He's using statistics from dating sites. If a 25 year old female sees the same stats on two profile of two dudes who look roughly similar with the only difference being the age, then she'll likely go for the 32 year old instead of the 48 year old.
I don't think i've ever seen a 30 year old look older than a 48 year old, but what do i know. I think it's in your 40s when it goes really downhill if you have shitty genetics and don't take care of yourself.
What kind of person take so much pleasure from other peoples debasement and shame. I'm 53 and waiting for a peak that will never arrive at this point. It sucks to the point that it may even be painful, and here you are expressing joy at this type of loss
3:38. The six different balloons here are interesting. "Fun" "Sincerity" and "Intelligence" should actually be lumped together with "physical attractiveness" however, because the more attractive the guy is, the more fun, sincere, and intelligent he is perceived to be. This, of course, skews things extremely in favor of physical attractiveness that is favored by women. But we men all know this already.
I’m 59 and have NEVER done better. I am tall and a lawyer and dress well so that helps BUT I workout, take TRT, stem cells, etc… Live in SoFL and every week I get another stunner interested It’s actually hard breaking up with them to make room Guys-spend 95% of your time working out and making $ and gonout 2 nights a week. You’ll do great. -workout, slim out, dress well, smell nice …you’ll be fine
Its probably why its the only time of my life i got approached by à 23 yo girl and another 18 yo girl. It was never because i was actually attractive. I just "peaked". This is one of the funniest yet saddest things ever 😂😂😂. Im 33 now and im back to "normal" 😂😂😂...
Curious, what’s your height, fitness, rough attractiveness, lifestyle, and income (roughly). Not doubting you do well. More so that you may be an exception. Ex. I don’t doubt the 38 yr old, handsome fit, 6ft director of Marketing making $200k will thrive into his 30s.
Would put looks in both cases at position 1, with the difference beeing that below average attractiveness is enogh for most man, whilst for most woman, anything average or below is not physically attractive. Only talking about get to know phase / online dating.
It annoys me how men are cast as cradle snatching though because in truth if you're a 40yo man you can't date another 40yo if you want kids. Why didn't you get married younger? I tried, but when I was younger I didn't have money and got ruled out because I was poor. So you can't really win these days unless you happen to get lucky and make bank very young, but it's not reasonable to expect the majority of men to manage this, money doesn't grow on trees as they say.
@@tongobong1 But what ages are you interested in? Cause anything above 25 is too much to me to put up with. After that range, they usually are conflicted: they hate men, they are traumatized, have a really high body count and want to marry and have children ASAP, all at the same time.
Dudes complain about not having looks, but trust me when I say not having money is wayyy worse, especially when you have good looks, its one of the most depressing things. 99% of my first dates end with hooking up, and all of them want to continue seeing me, but then they realize I'm too damn broke to even afford going on dates, and eventually they lose interest, despite them finding me attractive. Guys! Get Your Money Up!!! Get rich before you hit your 30s! Cause nothing is more unattractive then a broke 30 year old
Except an unnattractive 30 year old. You have zero logic for saying it's way worse to not have money. Unnattractive men wouldn't even get to hook up (beyond an overweight heffer) even if having a good job, so how on earth is that better? Being dumb doesn't seem to be much of a hindrance to hooking up in your case, but perhaps it is to making money.
Is this a surprise to anyone. I noticed many years ago that approximately 5% of men can are the ones women are crazy about and the rest have to struggle. I didn't have any charts, I simply used my eyes and looked around me.
It is important to consider that this is taking general preferences; alternative romantic-sexual preferences, including alternative preferences in heterosexual contexts, do exist. For example with chart 7, while in general there's a heteronormative preference for men to be relatively taller to women, that won't universally be the case. As an average height straight guy, I would be fine with being with a taller woman, and actually prefer that more than a woman who is 5" shorter than me or more. A 6'3" woman to me would be more attractive than a 5'3" woman IMO. One thing I would like elaboration on as well is the "facial attractiveness" of chart 3: what objective qualifiers are used to determine attractiveness? My initial reaction is that the top 91-100%, 81-90%, and 71-80% decile examples are less attractive then all the other faces since those top 3 decile example portraits all seem to have really blocky, angular, almost caricature-ish face shapes whereas the others look natural and actually like... human I guess. Even if a given face comes off potentially less masculine like the 31-40% face, it looks normal, and thereby better than the examples given for the top 30%. Even the 0%-10% example IMO looks better; the guy has normal teeth, a decent beard, and a good smile, and the receding hair for many wouldn't be a deal-breaker (tbf, for many it would, but that's whatever). I would anticipate like, 0%-10% to have facial deformities, scars, asymmetries, underbite or overbite, lazy eye, or other things people tend to have superficial prejudice against in terms of appearance. Better quantified information here would be much better.
Im legit a 26 year old virgin and have never had dating options. Ironically according to this video, i should be having the most amount of options currently but i dont have any at all. Kinda crazy
@@LoveMadeLogical that's a good question! I know as a teenager I was shy so I think that was the main reason. However once I turned 20, I was no longer shy but I kept getting rejected. I think alot of it is that I'm never in a conducive environment for dating. For example, I'm in med school with 30 students with women who already have bfs. They aren't open to set up guys either. So I'm just not in a great position currently
it's obvious, but try to gym-max, face-routine-max, socialize more (not necessarily with women, just to increase the social circle), pursue some goals outside of a job
I peaked at around 50. Out of nowhere, women started looking at me like I was lunch. I almost got an aneurism because I had consistently repelled women for 50 years. 😮😮
The conversation about this subject online is genuinely insane. Basically, there's no place for ugly and average people in online dating spaces, and everyone acts super crazy about it. Then I look around at the real people I know, and I see a lot of dumpy, homely, financially unimpressive people finding each other, getting married, and having babies, the point being that a lot of people are taking a different approach to dating and mating. This one works for average folk, and maybe people need to start asking what that is that they're doing differently, because echo chamber yelling matches online are not the move.
To judge what women want they took data from dating sites. However, a certain type of woman would never consider using a dating site. So the statistics are possibly skewed. For example, lots of conservative or religious women don't do dating sites and would look for a possible marriage partner at church or maybe work. So those women might have different priorities such as sincerity. Women in the hookup culture go on dating sites a lot and so naturally they aren't as concerned about "sincerity".
I was thinking the same thing. He did preface that with the first chart, though (it's not that most men are too ugly to date, it's that most men are too ugly to hook up with)
nope. you are wrong. they are the same. conservative and religious women are not made of fairy dust. they all have the same apish biological imperative
Yet the apps ChristianDating and FarmersOnly are very much a thing. Probably because they're also marrying and divorcing younger, and so need to expand their pool outside the gossip bubble of their local church and small town.
Lesson I learned from this video: dating stats show that women who speed date and who use dating apps aren't typically looking for their lifetime partner. They see this kind of dating as temporary and thus a man's appearance is most important. Risking an std or pregnancy isn't worth dating someone unattractive. However, women who are looking for long-term partnerships are self-reporting that multiple other traits are either as important or more important than attractiveness. Men's stats seem similar in many ways other than age preferences. So, where can people go to find others who are seeking only long-term partnerships and not just using each other?
The problem is simply that women find men unattractive on principle. This is a very smart strategy. Because they put themselves in a position of power and choice. By finding all man unattractive you can let them work for your affection. So if only he "changes" and "does something special" will he start to become attractive. And of course this changing and doing special things never is really enough. There is always more changing and doing special things to be done...
@@theBear89451 On the contrary. The "smartness" is not consious, but evolutionary. And your words confirm that. It is in the reproductive and thus evolutionary interest of women, and their children to create optimal circumstances for their growth and development. An important part of these circumstances is the ability to manipulate men into doing the things that women deem important and necessary for their children (provide money, food, clothes, safety, etc.). The combination of the eternal promisse of sex combined with the eternal pronunciation of rejection are precisely the tools in the womans arsenal to enable this manipulation.
You're sorta right. Women do act that way, EXCEPT when a man flips the script. When a man acts like he's not interested and he's too good for a girl, he instantly becomes more attractive.
@@UserNameAnonymous If we put attractiveness on a scale of 1-10, that strategy can give you maybe like +1 point or something. People love to pretend that guys with game can get any woman, but either that was never true, or it's not true for young adults nowadays.
@lightworker2956 it's as true as it has ever been. If it's not working for you, that means you haven't figured out your style yet. It means you don't really believe it. And it won't let a guy who is a 2 land a girl who is a 9, but a 4 guy can get a 7 girl. I've seen it over and over again. I've seen a fat, ugly guy get cute girlfriends repeatedly.
Lots of personal experiences/comments here. I'm keeping this short. My recommendation is to just be yourself and go about life. Its the chance encounter that I enjoy the most and be on your toes when the moment is right. Don't miss it and don't be shy.
Women do not know they like you until they see you having fun. It has worked for over 4 decades for me. Do not waste time and money on the apps for a relationship. Most of those women have already done a bit too much.
Not really. The 50% of women that will gladly trade in a partner for something better is still the same today as yesterday. Only now those types of women are all competing for the top 10% of men. Who rotate them out like a carrousel. The Bros are coming to the rescue and saving many men from these predators.
@@CornpopBadDude Yes really. The 50% of women that will trade you in are now holding a special device in their hand to let them search a 20 mile radius for anyone who will put up with her. HINT: this didn't help stabilize relationships.
I was a gaming dork my whole life, then got some muscle mass snd bought a house. Despite balding severely and being only 5’10 I have much more luck with women than ever before.
Muscle mass and money are two pretty big difference makers👍, also 5'10" is perfectly fine lol, it's an acceptable height to like 85% of women. Only starts getting tough below 5'8".
The amount of rejection I had as a young man destroyed my self confidence forever. Even in the rare occasion a woman flirts with me, I look at trying to "pick them up" as guaranteed rejection. Hopefully with all these RUclips videos young men will be able to figure out what women want and have better luck. The future depends on it.
Nothing wrong with learning pickup and fucking a lot of chicks. It does wonders for your self-confidence no matter how shabbily you were treated when younger. Once you learn not to care about women's reactions to you because you know you can just get another one, that changes *everything* . Good luck brother, it can be done, YOU can do it!
Women spend hours painting their faces, picking out clothing and color coordinating things, getting their hair done, picking out perfumes. If men did the same in hopes of attracting a woman, the ratings for men may be way higher.
@@29yyears Well I don’t know you personally so its hard to give advice. Many women do like colognes if its the right one. Dont overdo it tho. Can you grow a decent looking beard. A good beard can make you look better if you are bald
I started getting attractive after 30. Now I'm 34 still looking better day by day and getting attention of women from 20 to 40. I'm like what the hell is going on. This is surprising for me also.
Okay wait soooo what I'm getting is that baby faced women would have the longest lasting desirability?? ex: I always get mistaken as a high schooler even tho I'm mid 20s which means mid 30s I'd be around my prime??🤔
@@RikusLategan yes that is true! Thanks for that perspective! I'm talking about solely looks here. Maturity in the partners' personality would require a whole other video haha
actually you do... probably from ugly women Or unattractive women who has lower status than you, finds you attractive. The problem here is that you don't notice cuz (We) as average men, we ignore them and complaining that we can't find the "Pretty ones"
Not at all surprising. But I've seen many other large studies which totally substantiate all my observations: height is king in women's eyes. And it's not really important in men's eyes. And I believe a good argument can be made that women are _more_ concerned with physical attractiveness. Perhaps men just know, consciously or subconsciously, it's no use to pursue the best-looking women. It (seggs) will never happen. But we cannot say the opposite. By the way, 'irregardless' is not a word.
As a guy who is tall and ugly, I can honestly say that height is definitely NOT king. I would say that height does matter but I've never been able to compete with shorter guys with prettier faces than I have.
Whoa, nice twist with the overlaid IQ graph! And the brain damaged analogy! *chef's kiss* You just earned a subscription, buddy. Well done. Creative, engaging and insightful. Everything I like in a RUclips channel.
The fairy tail about Beauty & Beast taught us one important lesson. IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW YOU LOOK, HOW SMART YOU ARE, IF YOU HAVE A CASTLE WITH LOTS OF GOLD ROFL
Hi, PhD in Soc Psych here - just don’t think too much about potential implications of this video for you: Both the „studies“ and their interpretation are cringeworthy and misleading 😂 This is complete YT bs-science at its worst 🎉
@@ShortFuseFun No, he/she makes a valid point. The data come only from 2 studies while there are hundreds of similar ones all with slightly different conclusions. Some (obvious) principles are consistent (e.g. younger, richer, and/or better-looking people being more attractive on average), but nobody ever found a nuanced generalisable "formula of attractiveness". The comment above is trying to point out that while the data shown are true for a large population, they are being over interpreted when applied to the single individuals since they are simplified models that have some value only in a statistical sense
Came here to say a similar thing. This video from a scientific standpoint is downright negligent. Only cited 2 studies - and didn't even link the original studies. Further, WTH is happening at 2:10 ?? He says "although data was never posted, we can make a chart inferring on what he said". WTF is that?? You cant just make a visualization based on what someone said is a general trend. Absurd. When presenting the speed-dating study he only presented R coefficients - this is a measure of variance. It tells us very little about actual trend and direction, and the strength of that direction, only how close the data is to the line of best fit
These statistics show how the western societies have changed by feminism. I'm a 55 years old and 30 years ago things were very different. It was alot easier for a young man to find a date. I kinda feel sorry for young men today.
Another thing that changed is, women used to appreciate a compliment in person. Today, if she has ANY revealing quality she has been told 1000 times and expects in return a man with EVERY revealing quality.
Nah, they peak at ~22-25. Once they got their education sorted and are functional adults. Nobody wants to actual date / marry a 18-19 Yo.. they are literally teenagers.
@@L4verdz I 100% agree with you. I don't want to be mean but guys who said that women peak at 19 are probably never been with a women. I have dated different women from different age and from my experience the women 18 to 20 years old are just child in an adult body. Now they are expections like always but most young women are just immature, you can't build a relationship let alone a family with the vast majority of them I mean some of them can't even do basic cooking or drive a car i have seen this first hand 😂😂
Stopped watching this video after 90 seconds because the comments are WAY better. My advice...learn to love yourself FIRST, and remember that when you have a mate, you need your friends MORE, not less.
Holy shyt man, that is one hell of a big research you did. Since i don't know what else to say, i will simply say "Bravo". Hope your channel grows and you find more material on how to solve some of modern society and dating issues, you got a knack for it.
I slept with 100+ women till 27. I am bellow average looks but i am 6'5 and i enyoj talking to them, you should lower the preatty ones and pedestal the ugly ones and they will like you. And never spend money on them, rule no.1.
Confidence and trust also play a role I think. Confidence makes everyone more attractive, and trust holds the relationship together. I'm 41, my girlfriend is 33 and while the interest was mutual, she's clearly the one who drove it in the beginning. We're both academics, well earning, met at work. I'm 6'2", she's 5'5".
But men will settle. An average man foolishly looks in the mirror and says, gee I deserve an average woman. Not knowing that average women find him absolutely repulsive.
Considering the offered statistic that all men are most attracted to women in their early twenties, and since most women can't stay in their early twenties forever, I think young women might want to prioritize finding a man who can be trusted to stay loyal to her forever after.
I think there is a bias: age is not important as a number, what is important is PERCEIVED age. So, as a man, if you are 30 but you look like 25, you're starting peaking. If you are 25 but look like 30, stay young, stay fit, stop smoking and stop drinking. I'm 33 and dating gets better every year. Had no chances at 25.
My cope is summed up best by a quote:
“Chase butterflies and you’ll never catch them. Build a garden and then they’ll come. Even if they don’t, you’ll have your garden”
Loving it.
People don't want to be with somebody who. needs someone else to complete themselves or their life. Build a great life, and someone will want to be a part of it with you.
This is the spirit! Love this! Thank you for sharing!
Now that I'm in my 30s and (thank god) don't have to date anymore, this is the best dating advice I've ever heard
You don't even need to cope, just get off the dating apps and cold approach multiple women (kind of like what you're describing). If they show disinterest, move on immediately. Save yourself the time and energy and her the creep factor. Also, it depends on how much you vibe with a chick (sometimes ones you know)
Step 1: be attractive
Step 2: don't be unattractive
Step 3: Be a lawyer.
Step 4: Be young.
By "attractive" women mean "rich"
@@jackdaniel4875 That's literally impossible.
I found this very interesting. Especially re the attractiveness characteristics.
I'm surprised there isn't more difference between the INITIAL high correlation toward finding youth and classic things like a given face highly attractive -- and what happens after some time when one comes to KNOW someone re their attitudes, beliefs, intelligence, sense of humor, etc.
I'm 65. And yeah, it's genetic to initially find beautiful 20ish year old women highly attractive. But since I was working at age 22, after attending college around LOTS of silly and immature women, I found LOTS of women who were 30 to 35 and in shape and reasonably attractive but not "beautiful" FAR more attractive than the vast majority of the early 20's immature women/girls, especially once I got to know them a bit.
I'm also surprised this attraction to more mature but still attractive women didn't show up more for men, but maybe I'm even weirder than I assumed I was...
"Frank was awkward, and a little too pushy. Greg was handsome."
I'm 75 and I still haven't peaked
Maybe it was too low to have one anyway
Its funny when you are a 2/10 you were never worth anything
Bravo!
I'm 50+ and still a virgin.
@@rswow Dude, just pay for it.
Most dudes who are mediocre, know it. Tons of mediocre women think they're hot.
This comment initiated a brain-spasm for me, arriving at a strong explanation for this:
1. Men's sexual urges peak much earlier than women's do (this is well-known among sexologists).
2. The perception of our own attractiveness is largely determined by the amount of undesired romantic attention we get, not the desired romantic attention.
3. People's understanding of the world around them revolves most strongly around lessons learned early.
4. The sexdrive asymmetry causes young women to fend off oversexed young men, during their late formative years, which then turns into a persistent overestimation, even when they themselves are the ones being turned down later on.
This logically sums up why mediocrely attractive women overestimate their attractiveness: It's mostly a timing issue, though there's also the fad of women telling young girls that they're beautiful - which is quite harmful if you think about it; not only instilling false expectations but also a shallow sense of self-worth.
BS. Everyone suffers from self-doubt and a lot of people are compensating. Most dudes who COULD be kind of attractive don't want to put in the effort. Having a crappy personality makes you unnatractive to women as well. I'd say given your attitude towards women, most women find you unattractive.
@@AGHathaway women find 95% of men UNattractive....
@@AGHathaway Actually, my attitude towards women is just fine, I'm happily married and you're projecting your political bias - which I don't have. I mentioned it's a timing issue, not a "women are stoopid issue" or whatever your polarized mind turned it into.
I think a lot of dudes are telling girls they're hot, there's no girls telling an average dude he's hot lol Just the way it is, their horniness sets them up for delusions. Who knows if it's even a net positive though, the confidence itself is a good trait to have, but when it's too much it's definitely unattractive and comes off as crazy.
Pro tip. If a girl is interested in you, they'll make it very easy early on. Don't try to 'earn' your way into their heart (aka work your way out of friend zone). Tried this when I was younger and it led to a long term world of pain and heart ache. Girls who were interested in me back then made life easy and were open to me emotionally and physically.
Yes and no. It depends on a lot of factors, such as cultural background, mental state and a lot more. While for the most part, what you said is true, the truth always lies in the grey zone, it`s never black or white.
Learnt about this quite late. I wish I knew this earlier. Life could have been much easier.
Learnt about this quite late. I wish I knew this earlier. Life could have been much easier.
Yes, if a woman is into you, she does everything to get you into her life. Just like guys do. If a woman is not into you, you may get to somewhere with her, but she never ever will love you sincerely. In that case you are just a temporaly solution to her.
True. The tall and very good looking guys I know, you can clearly see how easy they make it for them. As long as they are not broke, it's smooth sailing.
All my life I was told to focus on my education and become successful in life. Now I've got a shit ton of money but no women. Couldn't be happier.
Treat life as a game and spend time with women, for gathering moments.. not for future expectations.. you will definitely enjoy it.. I, once went to a movie with a girl, 3 years above my age on a bike.. which I thought was impossible in my life.. one more thing to say, girls also have a dirty mind. They just don't share it with anyone.. if you are able to open it.. you may get what you need... 👉👌
Just buy them
🎯 winning formula
Happy at not getting any action?!
@@irgendeinname9256Essentially marriage. You get what you pay for. I'd stay with leasing though....😅😅😅
I love how sincerety is so unimportant to women it's probably a turn-off
Yeah it was so small, but its the first they bitch about, they are such hypocrites
Women want to be lied to. Tell them that they are beautiful even if they are not.
@@Novusod What I have always found weird in women's friendships is that they will lie to each other all the time. I never understood it. Like "no, youre so pretty!" to their friend Gorlox the destroyer type person. My friends literally point out to me ive gained weight and im just like "ah sh*t, true" and I go back to the gym.
They love Chads.
@@jeepeedurocher😂 gorlox the destroyer
The chart #4 at 6:40 is actually devastating. If you're working in labor or services, you're actually less attractive than not working at all. Makes you realize why no one wants to work these jobs today. They're less than not appreciated; they're a negative effect on your status as a man.
women will pick a mediocre lawyer over a financially successful plumber.
@@yoshi314 What's considered labour? Construction workers are generally pretty jacked.
@appa609 but the stigmatism of the "dirty, vulgar construction worker" is still in affect.
And yet this is not true for women. Even though it happened decades ago I still remember a gorgeous woman who waited on me at a Macs. I would have taken a shot except I was with another woman.
what exactly is labor or services? Which jobs are they?
The attractiveness/age correlation statistics hide a phenomena: the MOST attractive men do peak at 37, but the vast majority of men tank in their 30s, putting on a beer belly and losing muscle, which drives the average curve down.
also attractiveness means better dressed, better shape than in 20s
most guys here have receding hairline and look tired by late20s early30s , i think 20 to 30 its real physical prime after you start aging slowly
@@rafaelamorim3527every men can age like fine wine. But most mens have shitty routines, habits and dont know how to take care for him self. If they would prioritize sleep, food, working out, skincare and mental health and stop doing their bad habits, it would easily double most men’s attractiveness
Hair loss too. Even for attractive men they still look best in their 20's
@@ardianha5346Nah, you can't look better as you age. You can only maintain your looks, soften the decline
Wow. The timing of me seeing this video couldnt be more perfect, I was with a narcissist for 4 years, and when we stopped seeing each other, i found the love of my life, and because i was trauma bonded, i ended up ruining things but i realized my mistake and did all i could to make sure i got her back.
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i am in a similar situation, and i do not know what else do to have her back, i have been dying inside, people actually think i am happy, i am not
I feel your pain , after trying out the no contact experiment that failed miserably, i had to find other means, i had to reach out to a spiritual adviser, it was brilliant idea which i never thought it was, but it worked wonders for me
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach him/ her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
as a 27 year old virgin. Out of all my 6 best buddies I grew up with, they are all also absolute virgins +- 2 years my age.
Everyone with their own place to rent, stable job and at least 4 of us are not obese lol.
I can tell what lead to this tho.
-None of us ever gained any visible muscle at all and I wouldnt exactly recommend modeling to anyone either.
-Most of us work in tech, went to school in tech, studied in tech, so > or < 0 female friends or contacts built over the years.
-We never went to drinking parties either.
-We gamed a lot, so even less time spent in public.
I think if I had to actually try avoiding women any harder, I wouldnt know what more I could do heh.
I think clueless type of guys like us only avoided extinction historically because we got carried by arranged marriage honestly.
Yes, which was smarter than today. Dating is a scam and people fell for i. You need to spend a bunch of time and resources for it while time ago it was easy since you got someone anyway and back than all women where nice and beautiful
You would have been the ideal husbands, unless woman wanted a fun partnernimstead of a reliable husband
If you know your problems why don't you change them
@@danicruz226cause they aren't problems. It's the path for success, while playing around leads to pregnancies when you aren't even capable of providing. What is he supposed to change? The dating market of the west itself is the only reason for the population collapse. This is why arranged marriages used to exist.
@@danicruz226 Have you ever heard people say "I'm going to start going to the gym this year, and lose some weight as my New Year's resolution!"?
That's basically the reason. Establishing the habit of doing things with other people requires time, effort, and satisfying pre-requisites.
It's not a switch you turn on, it's a full-blown lifestyle change. And people like me tend to be both reactive to the environment, as well as having a history where our ability to initiate and follow through on plans has been paralyzed by training.
for example, it's easy to know that I should "reach out to people" or "join a club", but then I walk outside, and look around, and think "Well this is boring, what am I even doing here", and then turn around, walk back inside, do a search, click through the top few website results, fail to find something that looks good, and then get distracted by a youtube video, or a tutorial, or a book, or some video games, or netflix, or professional development, or a remote job, etc...
And then there's the issue that meeting people requires you to know people, or be introduced, or know where to find people on a regular basis in a way where you can be friends. the longer you've been away from that, the more difficult it becomes to get plugged back in. You just loop the same day, over and over, as the years pass by.
Your daily reminder that the goal of Dating websites is NOT to find you a partner. Their goal is to MAKE MONEY.
Dating sites actively benefit from pairing you with bad matches so that you stay and pay longer.
Eh, it is possible to have two goals at the same time, and more, but of course there can only be one at the top of the list but it's of course connected/related. You must be American, as only Americans can only see one side of the story.
1) If men could go on the sites and get laid in a day, every single man would be permanently signed up, looking for the next lay.
2) The dating sites cannot influence female choice, which is the only real bottleneck to mating.
I think dating is hard enough that they don't need to hand anyone bad matches purposefully lol.
Souchirouu, exactly. Everything else is just blah blah blah. (I'm not American btw.)
hahahahahahaha!!!!!
I'm in my 50s now, and looking back I can say that I got WAY more attention from women of all ages in the decade 35-45 than at any other stage of life.
Absolutely, 35-45 is truly men's prime. The fallacy with the study is that it doesn't take into account that women in their late 20s and early 30s become exponentially more desperate to find a partner while still looking for men older than themselves which results in dating becoming much easier for men between 35-45.
that's probably because you were in a better place.
In my dating life I learned only one thing, white guy asian female works just fine. Don't even try to speak to a Western woman of any age!
Were you poor until you were 35?
Yup
I am 27 and invisible to women. They ignore me completely. If this is what peaking is for me, then I am cooked
train your chest, work on your posture and gait
Mew, and unlock that inner Rizz lord of the sigma.
go to thailand and buy a women. Earn some money first... otherwise shes gone fast. hf
You should consider law school.
Go to the gym, get a Nice hair cut and start going to the club, youre gonna make it
I think what some fail to realize is that while growing up, girls get dating advice (what we should want in a man, and what a man expects us to be) from that larger group of women that only chase that top small group of men, and that screws up our perception of what our goals should be.
Crap from women’s magazines, Disney Princess fantasies, rom coms… only to realize Prince Charming is nowhere to be found.
When I took dating more seriously, loosened my expectations, and asked men what they actually want… they were much easier to please than I thought and some of the best bachelors were hidden gems you wouldn’t consider at first. I realized I was brainwashed.
Women blame pornography for men’s supposed preferences, but truly, men won’t reject your company if you’re good company 😅
it's the personality that makes people stay right?
Truth
Porn has nothing to do with anything real. We only interact with porn cause our urges get really bad, like when really hungry for food. The urge is constant and what you gonna do, you can’t focus on work if you don’t relieve it, your mind is clouded by it. It’s got nothing to do with reality and people we want to connect to..
@@RisingSun0904Yep
Being a decent person, it’s literally as simple as that
You said exactly what my cousin has told me and other women. She married her 1st love and been married 24 years now for a reason.
Men are simple. Simply show interest and they’re yours
I peaked at 1 year old, that was my most attractive stage in life!!
Grew up in DC or Hollywood?
@@trumpwonyoudolts 200iq joke that went over too many peoples heads.
Lol
I must of peaked in the womb, b/c when i came out, my mom looked at me, then at the the Dr, & said, Shove it back in, it's UGLY....
I used to look really good for my age back when I was 1.
When I was 1 people would say "Man, you don't look a day over 0".
(Dennis Miller 1995).
Interesting fact - when women judge the attractiveness of strangers - the dustribution is very skewed (only 15% of men are judged as better than average) but when they judge men they know from their social circle the distribution becomes normal. So if you're not in that top 15% of attractiveness you're much better off looking for love in your peer group.
That's actually saves us from being with someone we don't know much about.
Sucks to be women.
That tracks with the charts he showed though right? A random person is more likely to be a hookup whereas someone in your social circle is more likely to be something long-term.
remember though, not every fits the median or is relevant to 2 unique people. We've all had the hots for someone we can't explain why, and it's not the type you'd typically be interested in.
Interesting. Likely related to the risk thing.
That's probably just because they don't want to be rude towards them, kinda like how they tell their girlfriend Gorlox the Destroyer that she's beautiful, perfect and that she don't need to change in any way. It's just them avoiding conflict.
Asking women what they want is always a losing strategy
Finally someone with some common sense. I'll give everyone here a little secret: women are attracted to men who are busy with their own lives and could take them or leave them. Nothing is more unattractive to a woman than a man who's building his life around trying to attract women.
And in the modern day, they only behave well if there aren't excess resources going around. The only checks on women are when they actually need men, or socially there is shaming for restriction. Notice the west passes neither test.
Ask a woman their opinion and you'll get 100.
Ok boomer
There is some truth to this. As the study shows, What they say and what they actually do are completely different.
A rancorous divorce definitely stopped my desire for relationship seeking. One of my attractive female colleagues said to me that if I keep dressing the way I do, that I would never find another girl. I commented back, "Thank God, my plan is working."
If a man made that comment about the dressing to a woman in the US, he would be reported to HR.
I'm curious, how do you dress? Real question.
@@flynnk70 Probably sporty and in clothes from the supermarket that don't match. ;)
Why marry in the first place?
@@flynnk70 Real answer. Like an absolute slob.
There are a couple of other things to mention. My colleague wasn't trying to be snarky. We've known each other for years. Additionally, she is quite the stylish dresser and the few times I saw her husband, he is kept stylish - not sure if that is his practice or hers. She has seen me when I have been dressed up and knows that I look nice.
Baggy pants or shorts. Old t-shirts with logos. Beat up tennis shoes. Perhaps ultra-ultra-comfy sliding into slobbishness.
While these statistics may be correct, as a woman, I recognise myself as an outlier. I'm deeply suspicious of overly attractive men, and a bit the same about high-earning men. I know I'm not alone in this. Equally, lots of women (me included) don't care at all about a man's height. We all need to remember that finding suitable partners is the search for one person (or a few people over a lifetime) who are a good fit. If you look at the people who actually get married or into exclusive/long term relationships, there are a lot of ugly poor people making each other pretty happy.
Most men view your views on women. Most good looking men want good looking women. The women want best looking mem but don't realize best looking men don't want 4's 5's or 6's. Men that are 4's 5's or 6's would feel satisfied with an equal woman in looks and status is honestly more important in probobly wealthier men. Men don't care too much about a womans status. We want someone to make us feel happy. The older we get (me) the less I care about looks. The quality of a woman on the inside matters more
i care about being with a man taller than me. I tried dating a short man, and it was not for me. I also like men that I am attracted too, and I like men who make good money doing honest work. I don't know any woman in my friends group who wants someone they are not attracted to physically, nor do i know any woman in my friends group that wants a man shorter than them.
We can only hope the physically attractiveness comes with an honorable soul.
@@Vhfash Now that's rare - honesty.
Funny how you can say all this and the reality is that you don’t know what you want and your brain is still subject to human nature
I am very much like you with all this
dude when im at peak at 25 and still invisible its over 💀
If it happened to me at 30, it will happen to you. Im not attractive yet i got some attention weirdly
the reason they peak at that age is cuz they already had prior experience ffs lol dont think there'll be some blessing from the heavens that turns you into the rizzler at your 25th birthday
It is the average, does not reflect your specific case and a big bunch of men are as attractive (or unattractive) as you at this age. The most important thing inst age at all, but how you look at this age; I guess men at this age just happen to be more physically fit and corrected skin issues they may have had in the pas
@DewiSant-o3y I mean if you aren't physically active people won't be attracted to you. Either find an easy high pay low hour job that allows you to dedicate 20 hours in the gym every week, or work a 50 hour a week job with low pay that keeps you in killer shape.
I chose to be poor af and stay in shape. I miss money but the brainpower that comes with muscles is worth it on a karmic transcendental level.
Still would rather be able to afford to live lmaooo. thats why im voting kamal
I am 25 and I can def say I am getting far more attention than just a year ago
I think the golden age for men is between 25 and 40. If a man eat healthy, works out, and doesn’t have hair loss, he can still look good and be attractive past his 40s.
physical prime: 18-35
working prime: 18-45-49 ish.
You are right about eating healthy food and working out but you all need to stop obsessing over hair loss, it's not that big of a deal. Men like Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statam are considered to be absolute chads. A woman with small tits can still be super attractive, same goes for bald men.
But you are not responsible for hair loss though …
Well, you might also want to lose some hair in places. Approaching my 30s, this new back hair really sucks.
@@cachememorythere's a lot of idiots posting who think that it's controllable, and that one should have to go on life long drugs for it. Its a joke
This works for 1st dates only, then you meet and find out there is absolutely no chemistry. Looks will only take you so far. I speak from experience.
yeah, looks will only get their attention, but your overall status, personality, money situation, etc is what determines if she will keep seeing you or not.
Looks don't take u far if the girl is at your level w looks or higher. But if she's even 1 or 1.5 below (10 scale) oh boyy looks give u wings my friend 🪽 those women will even say they'll "wait for you' if you say emotionally u can't commit 🤫
@@zerocal76 any woman that thinks she is over 5 in looks thinks she looks better than any male and he needs to prove himself to her with status and a nice willing personality,bradpit gets woman far more than billgates because he is better looking,
There is difference if women want a man for their money, or she wants a man to be able to provide for her to raise a family.
Women are like snakes, they will hear what man wants in relationship and they will try to trick you by telling you what you want to hear. In that case she will be desperate to fill those expectation but not because she wants it, but because she wants to keep you committed to her. In that case she will be unhappy, and eventually she will divorce you and give up, even if you have kids together.
@@Zemlja_je_ravna "For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword." -Proverbs 5:3-4
That last graphic comparing male and female homosexual couples is super insightful, and adds weight to the idea that women grow unhappy within a couple faster than guys. Certainly food for thought. Thanks for putting together all that information.
I generally agree with the divorce graph, however one thing to keep in mind is that because of current divorce laws women are often net takers in a divorce, which makes divorce a somewhat more palatable option for them. Women get primary custody of children far more often, get spousal and child support far more often, typically contribute less to marital wealth and thus get cash they didn't work for, and more often get to remain in the marital home. Because of this, the downside risk for a woman in a divorce is far less.
This is why usually men are the one who ask women to marry them. If hookup culture has high risks for women, bc they might end up getting pregnant and 100% responsible for being the caregiver and the breadwinner for that family; divorce culture present a higher risk for men, since a lot of the families still see the man as the breadwinner and the woman as the caregiver exclusively. However, the risk is always higher for women when there's children involved: if the woman used to have a job and has a kid, there's a high chance she'll live her job at least in the first 2-5 years of the kid, if not forever, which creates a huge experience gap in a woman's career and makes her financially dependent to men, or, at least, it becomes more difficult for her to get a job. I think it's only fair that if men can call their's a child to who they contributed 1% into growing, women can call their's their husband's belongings as well.
If that was true, women in same sex marriages would be less likely to divorce than women in single sex marriages, but that is not the case
@mujtabaalam5907 Agreed. I can't find any other reason that explains this other than women are generally more emotional and thus more likely to initiate divorce. If anything, same-sex females should have even higher chances of divorce.
@@revenger211 it is, just like in same sex men marriages cheating is more common than other scenarios
And they do. Lesbian couples have higher incidence of divorce than straight couples.
Thank god I'm gay.
Hahaha, love this comment. ;-)
A bisexual man once told me that he feels sorry for straight guys, having to put up with women 😂
Sounds great Norstator, but do you have a partner?
@@GrnXnhamI get your point.
Really, so you cant have a family. Nothing to be "proud" of.
The entire video refers to ONLINE dating and in reality, only to clicking but not to who really ends up with who.
You should point that out more clearly. It's not what most people are interested in life. They don't wanna hook up with someone new all the time. They want to find a person they can see regularly, so it's more about how to be attractive for 3rd and 4th date. Stats will change massively. There's also data for this.
This data has also been reviewed thousands upon thousands of times by better content creators. Not sure why this video was even made
But as previously said, online dating IS reality. It's the reality now. Most couples start off online. And their online habits affect their irl habits as well. And they don't have to want to hook up with someone new all the time. Wanting to hook up with someone new every once in a while is enough to ruin any relationship, which is why it's much more difficult to have a healthy relationship lately. Relationship quality tanked with the advent of online dating.
Who really ends up with who is also affected by online dating, because women end up with some dude that doesn't come even close to her online dating induced fantasies, and she'll never be happy with that guy, dooming the relationship in the short to mid term.
@@PepsiFuture can you share a link? Of the best one. Much appreciated
@@mrkiky still, the relative importance of the traits shown in the video are different outside of online dating. If I pay for a prostitute, I'll also look less for a high IQ compared to looks.
Lori Gottlieb is the best-selling author of "Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough."
There's a study in the book where men and women are asked, "If you got 80 percent of everything you wanted of your ideal traits in a mate or partner would you be happy?" The majority of women said, "No, that's settling," and the majority of men said, "Eighty percent? I'd be thrilled; that's a catch.
Men and women were asked, if they had any deal-breakers for going on a second date, what would those be? And men named three. If she's cute enough ... warm and kind ... and interesting enough to talk to, she gets a second date.
Women named 300 things that would rule out a guy for a second date and we are talking about like another two hours and may be a free dinner and they wouldn't do it and there were things like "he wore a brown belt with black shoes or we were having a really good time and i thought he was cute and he was interesting but then he did this Austin Powers impression and i just can't get that out of my mind and i can't go out with him again." This was in 2010 when dating apps and social media weren't big.
Okay, I realize I sound like an ass but young men, listen to me. Stop seeking affection from women that don't want you. First, get yourself financially ahead, second, get yourself healthy, third, get yourself a passport and travel some. You will change as a man once you start travelling and seeing how the world still works outside of the cesspool of relationships that The West. I don't care what you look like unless you are obese. Obese is a deal killer, everything else? There women out there that will find you as a possibility. If you are obese, yes, I was obese to be for years, got tired of being fat, don't waste your time with anything but intermittent fasting and some modest regular activity like walking, cycling, bball or formal exercise and time/body will fix it.
So you are saying that prostitutes in Southeast Asia are finding you attractive. Sure they do. Your dollars are what attracts them. ;-)
I used to work with a guy who was great looking, had great hair, also a serial cheater, pregnant wife, smart as a brick, affair w/a co-worker, professionally unsuccessful (and eventually failed out of the business). Women would throw themselves at him, and even discuss what their babies would look like.
I had him beat in every category but looks, and I was single and not a cheater/player. Although I could certainly get dates, the women didn't throw themselves at me like they did at this guy.
He was a serial cheat BECAUSE women threw themselves at him. IMO most men are not cheaters because of lack of access, not because they have better self control. Few have the willpower it takes to deny endless attractive females wanting a one night stand.
that's life for ya
But those are the women that throw themselves at tons of guys, so...
you are a cheater/player....or at least you wish you could be. Inferred by, "women don't throw themselves at me"....what is to be gained from women themselves at you? Stoke your ego? get to play the field with multiple women, feel like a boss cause you spread your dna and diseases?? You are just as bad as the players....if you had the looks or the rizz...you would do the same.
That's all.
The chart about profession is definitely spot on. When I joined the military I had a girl I was friends with comment about my uniform. She said, "that poor uniform..." I asked her what she meant, and she replied, "Its going to be all over the floor when I am done with you." That was definitely a confidence boost I wasn't expecting that day. 😆
Service, hospitality, and labor being so low is kind of unfortunate though. Those people are the backbone of society. People thank me for my service all the time, but its these people who have my thanks. And I truly mean that, as I've gotten older, and my previous career has taken its toll, these people have been a Godsend.
In my experience, the better you are for society the worse off you are treated...
@@NelsonGuedes
If you are good for society then you are an outlier and people hate outliers, they hate their betters. Society is a giant bucket of crabs.
Even profession is subjective. Since I don't make any distinction between a soldier and a serial killer, I would never get involved with a military man no matter how jacked they are. I don't support war pigs in politics or dating. Values trumps appearance.
@@NelsonGuedesYes. Teachers are also a prime example. What could be more important than preparing the next generation to.take over?
It is a good question because the numbers of these lowest are more than the higher? How do they reproduce? So, his figures are mostly about hookups which are just a ruinous part of the fake freedoms your slave masters conjure up. There will be more and more subservients and less lawyers even although the standards are much lower today , I've read the difficulty of university has dropped over 20x since 1960.
Dating an attorney / lawyer was the most stupidest thing I ever did.
Never date anybody who wants to be right all the time, has the mental arsenal to win every argument, and - in the end - can even use their job against you professionally.
I'd like to hear from women who find lawyers attractive why they do.
(In my case, the lawyer was the woman, so maybe male lawyers are different.)
Maybe I'm just being vulgar, but some people will just think the other person as a wallet so it doesn't matter what spew out of their mouth as long as the money flows.
The status of telling her girlfriends how her man is the big, big lawyer guy. The status of him always being well-dressed and of course the perceived high salary.
Other to that job: doctor (healer), firefighter (real man), police man (good guy + fit + uniform) and pilot (traveller) are the archetypical jobs women love to see. Not to forget CEO of something (commanding people while earning a looooot).
Just to drive home the point; law is a career that attracts Psychopaths and narcisists. As does politics. (No surprises there). So the chances of getting a really troubling person are higher.
I was astonished that the most attractice occupation to women was lawyer! I never would have guessed.
What we didn't see on the chart was that the most attractive occupations to women seem to be:
- Royalty. (Which a man can't change)
- Acting
- Music, particularly singing.
- Sport
Just so long as THEY ARE VERY SUCCESSFUL IN THE OCCUPATION. LIKE "RICH". I don't think struggling actors or musicians, even if exceptionally good, get much attention.
@@stephenhosking7384 That's not correct. Depending on your age, you can absolutely struggle and women will be greatly interested. They don't care too much for the money if you're "rich" like you believe. It's about the perceived status.
Top jobs are: doctor, firefighter, pilot. Those are the maximum prestige jobs, but they are relatively rare. A not-so-rare "job" is CEO or business founder.
Let's say you're 35, you get to know a women your age and she asks what you do for a living. Telling her you just founded a company 3 months ago, you work very much and hard and it's just you working as UX/UI designer for example, designing internet pages and you don't have any employees. Do it. Will change your perception 180 degrees. She will basically jump at you.
Just being rich inheritance won't help you at all with the average minded woman out there. On the very contrary. They will ENVY you. You didn't deserve to be rich. Therefore you are a crook! Or tell her you are a trader and multimillionaire already, because of Crypto. This is so massively unattractive to women, you could show up with a Porsche and they still will resent you, because they think of you as a speculator veeeeery badly Better tell her you're an addicted drug dealer then tell her you're a successful trader. Trust me.
The way I have seen dating lately is the importance of looking for girls interested in you. I still fall for wanting the hot girl but have began to go for girls that have interest in me. I realized that as a dude, there are probably women out there that really like you that you never pay attention to. The best advice that I got was a chaperone in a trip I went to, "be friends with everyone around you. Make experiences with them not for the sake of just hooking up, but getting to know them as a person. It really sets up for good relationships." Most people I know in relationships started off as friends and have all led to good long term relationships. Dating is really finding someone interested in you that you have interest back. That takes time.
This is actually one of the best dating video I’ve ever seen. Good work!
My wife was loveliest in her 20s and hottest in her 40s. In our sixties we laugh a lot together, Find a love in your 20s- make it work. You may have to travel. Toys and "freedoms" are dust.
Many people nowadays can't find anything, that is datable in their twenties
You got a better chance of winning the lottery than finding love like that.
You use hottest instead of beautiful to describe your wife. I don’t trust you
How many kids do you have?
“Hottest in her 40s”
My God, the crap people come up with to cope with monogamy.
That being unemployed is less unattractive than being in the servisce sector says a lot about our society
An unemployed person has time for you. A waiter/waitress etc. is simply tired all the time.
You'd be hard pressed to carry yourself as "the man" when you spend your waking hours as a servant.
I was very annoyed when I saw I homeless women in California talking about her homeless boyfriend, while I was a doctor, living on the Mediterranean, and couldn't get a girlfriend.
Thank you for the stats, now I can give a powerpoint presentation when I tell my family I have given up on dating and they'll just respond with "you'll be fine"
And then there’s the outliers. I’m 47 and in the best shape of my life. Happily married for 13 years and getting told I’m aging like fine wine. I get more attention than I ever did in my thirties
Men age like fine wine. Women age like milk...
Women also have a "what does he have that's so good?" mentality. Also when a guy is in a relationship women see it as a pre - screened guy as woman tend to trust each others approval.
Agreed. This guy who made this video is a SIMP. Most of this video is objectively false & dishonest data.
Not blimping out and if you're lucky enough to keep your hair helps a lot.
@@Heike-- I'm 67 years old and still look like my profile picture you see here from 12 years ago at 55 This video is objectively FALSE information.
I believe no one peaks. Unless there's a disfiguring accident or illness, the genetic attractiveness will decide everything as long as you take care of yourself. A naturally more attractive 50 year old will always be above others of the same age.
The chart about females vs males max attractiveness is a good base, but still not showing the full truth.
If men were completely free to choose without any legal and societal restrictions, they would choose even younger females partners as other, older data has shown.
Still, great video again and keep up the awesome work!
The OkCupid data cuts off at 20. It's definitely likely women's prime it stretches down to at least 19, probably 18.
up to 10% of men would choose girls as young as 9
Exactly, trust no one, there are monsters everywhere.
@@zackdrake8735 trust is the bedrock of society.
@@zackdrake8735monsters? It’s just biology lol
I'm an autistic guy that might be in the top 5%. I've never really been that interested in women, I mean I'm straight but I've never been into hookups. I like video games more. But videos like this really explain why I've had such a hard time interacting with other men my whole life. Looks matter a lot more than I'd like to admit to myself. The girls that fell for me probably didn't fall for me because of my 'amazing personality'
Depends how well you take care of yourself. Im 48 Ive seen dudes in their 30s looking older than me.
He's using statistics from dating sites. If a 25 year old female sees the same stats on two profile of two dudes who look roughly similar with the only difference being the age, then she'll likely go for the 32 year old instead of the 48 year old.
I don't think i've ever seen a 30 year old look older than a 48 year old, but what do i know. I think it's in your 40s when it goes really downhill if you have shitty genetics and don't take care of yourself.
Love This! Finally, someone has said what I always knew...men do not get better with age like they all think
What kind of person take so much pleasure from other peoples debasement and shame.
I'm 53 and waiting for a peak that will never arrive at this point. It sucks to the point that it may even be painful, and here you are expressing joy at this type of loss
3:38. The six different balloons here are interesting. "Fun" "Sincerity" and "Intelligence" should actually be lumped together with "physical attractiveness" however, because the more attractive the guy is, the more fun, sincere, and intelligent he is perceived to be. This, of course, skews things extremely in favor of physical attractiveness that is favored by women. But we men all know this already.
Exactly, the halo effect. Brutal
I hold the same second u mentioned. Oh boy. What a world we live in
I’m 59 and have NEVER done better. I am tall and a lawyer and dress well so that helps BUT I workout, take TRT, stem cells, etc…
Live in SoFL and every week I get another stunner interested
It’s actually hard breaking up with them to make room
Guys-spend 95% of your time working out and making $ and gonout 2 nights a week. You’ll do great. -workout, slim out, dress well, smell nice …you’ll be fine
Moral of the story: Avoid hook up sites.
This applies to all social media and IRL unfortunately
I was getting A LOT more play from dimes at age 30-33 than I was at 25-29. I would say men’s peak is definitely in the early 30s.
25-35 is prime, before that most men even have money to date properly
38 is prime. Source "corn" site data. Women peak is 25
Its probably why its the only time of my life i got approached by à 23 yo girl and another 18 yo girl. It was never because i was actually attractive. I just "peaked". This is one of the funniest yet saddest things ever 😂😂😂. Im 33 now and im back to "normal" 😂😂😂...
My guy, this is the average. It's not "100% of men peak in their 20s"
Curious, what’s your height, fitness, rough attractiveness, lifestyle, and income (roughly).
Not doubting you do well. More so that you may be an exception. Ex. I don’t doubt the 38 yr old, handsome fit, 6ft director of Marketing making $200k will thrive into his 30s.
(for male )
step 1 : be rich
step 2 : be good looking
(for female)
step 1 : have a beautiful personality
step 2 : be good looking
Would put looks in both cases at position 1, with the difference beeing that below average attractiveness is enogh for most man, whilst for most woman, anything average or below is not physically attractive. Only talking about get to know phase / online dating.
"The winner takes it all". This is a clear proof that you bring for this well-known wisdom.
Thank you for the super interesting article❤
It annoys me how men are cast as cradle snatching though because in truth if you're a 40yo man you can't date another 40yo if you want kids. Why didn't you get married younger? I tried, but when I was younger I didn't have money and got ruled out because I was poor. So you can't really win these days unless you happen to get lucky and make bank very young, but it's not reasonable to expect the majority of men to manage this, money doesn't grow on trees as they say.
A man should take the youngest woman who will have him.
8 charts that show it's too late for me. lol
You and me both brother lol
Don't belive them. I am 46 and I have more chances than anytime before.
@@tongobong1 But what ages are you interested in? Cause anything above 25 is too much to me to put up with. After that range, they usually are conflicted: they hate men, they are traumatized, have a really high body count and want to marry and have children ASAP, all at the same time.
The longer the video went on for, the more interested I became in rope prices.
Dudes complain about not having looks, but trust me when I say not having money is wayyy worse, especially when you have good looks, its one of the most depressing things.
99% of my first dates end with hooking up, and all of them want to continue seeing me, but then they realize I'm too damn broke to even afford going on dates, and eventually they lose interest, despite them finding me attractive.
Guys! Get Your Money Up!!! Get rich before you hit your 30s! Cause nothing is more unattractive then a broke 30 year old
true
I dont think you realize how many men aren’t getting dates let alone GETTING LAID. You’re actually winning my friend
@@jelaninoel He's not winning if he's looking for a life partner and not just sex.
@@vinced2514 most men aren’t getting as far as he is. Take every win
Except an unnattractive 30 year old. You have zero logic for saying it's way worse to not have money. Unnattractive men wouldn't even get to hook up (beyond an overweight heffer) even if having a good job, so how on earth is that better?
Being dumb doesn't seem to be much of a hindrance to hooking up in your case, but perhaps it is to making money.
Is this a surprise to anyone. I noticed many years ago that approximately 5% of men can are the ones women are crazy about and the rest have to struggle. I didn't have any charts, I simply used my eyes and looked around me.
It is important to consider that this is taking general preferences; alternative romantic-sexual preferences, including alternative preferences in heterosexual contexts, do exist. For example with chart 7, while in general there's a heteronormative preference for men to be relatively taller to women, that won't universally be the case. As an average height straight guy, I would be fine with being with a taller woman, and actually prefer that more than a woman who is 5" shorter than me or more. A 6'3" woman to me would be more attractive than a 5'3" woman IMO.
One thing I would like elaboration on as well is the "facial attractiveness" of chart 3: what objective qualifiers are used to determine attractiveness? My initial reaction is that the top 91-100%, 81-90%, and 71-80% decile examples are less attractive then all the other faces since those top 3 decile example portraits all seem to have really blocky, angular, almost caricature-ish face shapes whereas the others look natural and actually like... human I guess. Even if a given face comes off potentially less masculine like the 31-40% face, it looks normal, and thereby better than the examples given for the top 30%. Even the 0%-10% example IMO looks better; the guy has normal teeth, a decent beard, and a good smile, and the receding hair for many wouldn't be a deal-breaker (tbf, for many it would, but that's whatever).
I would anticipate like, 0%-10% to have facial deformities, scars, asymmetries, underbite or overbite, lazy eye, or other things people tend to have superficial prejudice against in terms of appearance. Better quantified information here would be much better.
Some people like obese people. They are called fat fetishes, a type of disorder.
"heteronormative"? Found the Kamala voting "male".
its over
Im legit a 26 year old virgin and have never had dating options. Ironically according to this video, i should be having the most amount of options currently but i dont have any at all. Kinda crazy
Why do you think you've been struggling?
You look young for age? When I was 26 I looked 16 on a good day.
@@LoveMadeLogical that's a good question! I know as a teenager I was shy so I think that was the main reason. However once I turned 20, I was no longer shy but I kept getting rejected. I think alot of it is that I'm never in a conducive environment for dating. For example, I'm in med school with 30 students with women who already have bfs. They aren't open to set up guys either. So I'm just not in a great position currently
it's obvious, but try to gym-max, face-routine-max, socialize more (not necessarily with women, just to increase the social circle), pursue some goals outside of a job
acording to this video, it will only get worse from now on 💀
I peaked at around 50. Out of nowhere, women started looking at me like I was lunch. I almost got an aneurism because I had consistently repelled women for 50 years. 😮😮
The conversation about this subject online is genuinely insane. Basically, there's no place for ugly and average people in online dating spaces, and everyone acts super crazy about it. Then I look around at the real people I know, and I see a lot of dumpy, homely, financially unimpressive people finding each other, getting married, and having babies, the point being that a lot of people are taking a different approach to dating and mating. This one works for average folk, and maybe people need to start asking what that is that they're doing differently, because echo chamber yelling matches online are not the move.
To judge what women want they took data from dating sites. However, a certain type of woman would never consider using a dating site. So the statistics are possibly skewed. For example, lots of conservative or religious women don't do dating sites and would look for a possible marriage partner at church or maybe work. So those women might have different priorities such as sincerity. Women in the hookup culture go on dating sites a lot and so naturally they aren't as concerned about "sincerity".
I was thinking the same thing. He did preface that with the first chart, though (it's not that most men are too ugly to date, it's that most men are too ugly to hook up with)
nope. you are wrong. they are the same. conservative and religious women are not made of fairy dust. they all have the same apish biological imperative
Yet the apps ChristianDating and FarmersOnly are very much a thing. Probably because they're also marrying and divorcing younger, and so need to expand their pool outside the gossip bubble of their local church and small town.
@@martinstu8400 True, but there are outliers in that. I promise you.
AWALT
Lesson I learned from this video: dating stats show that women who speed date and who use dating apps aren't typically looking for their lifetime partner. They see this kind of dating as temporary and thus a man's appearance is most important. Risking an std or pregnancy isn't worth dating someone unattractive. However, women who are looking for long-term partnerships are self-reporting that multiple other traits are either as important or more important than attractiveness. Men's stats seem similar in many ways other than age preferences. So, where can people go to find others who are seeking only long-term partnerships and not just using each other?
The problem is simply that women find men unattractive on principle. This is a very smart strategy. Because they put themselves in a position of power and choice. By finding all man unattractive you can let them work for your affection. So if only he "changes" and "does something special" will he start to become attractive. And of course this changing and doing special things never is really enough. There is always more changing and doing special things to be done...
The strategy is because of cost of pregnancy, there is no way for one sex to maintain a "smart strategy".
@@theBear89451 On the contrary. The "smartness" is not consious, but evolutionary. And your words confirm that. It is in the reproductive and thus evolutionary interest of women, and their children to create optimal circumstances for their growth and development. An important part of these circumstances is the ability to manipulate men into doing the things that women deem important and necessary for their children (provide money, food, clothes, safety, etc.). The combination of the eternal promisse of sex combined with the eternal pronunciation of rejection are precisely the tools in the womans arsenal to enable this manipulation.
You're sorta right. Women do act that way, EXCEPT when a man flips the script. When a man acts like he's not interested and he's too good for a girl, he instantly becomes more attractive.
@@UserNameAnonymous If we put attractiveness on a scale of 1-10, that strategy can give you maybe like +1 point or something. People love to pretend that guys with game can get any woman, but either that was never true, or it's not true for young adults nowadays.
@lightworker2956 it's as true as it has ever been. If it's not working for you, that means you haven't figured out your style yet. It means you don't really believe it.
And it won't let a guy who is a 2 land a girl who is a 9, but a 4 guy can get a 7 girl. I've seen it over and over again. I've seen a fat, ugly guy get cute girlfriends repeatedly.
6:38 - _Less attractive than being unemployed … pretty much, being in the service industry._
😂
Dayum. That is rough.
You can't be "the man" if you're clearly a servant.
I'm a male in my 40s and get more attention than my 20s no idea why, maybe not giving a crap helps😂
Probably money
@@deleted01 but how do they know I have money just by looking at me?
Lots of personal experiences/comments here. I'm keeping this short. My recommendation is to just be yourself and go about life. Its the chance encounter that I enjoy the most and be on your toes when the moment is right. Don't miss it and don't be shy.
Worst possible advice to men: just be yourself.
Did you not see this chart? Women find 80% of "yourself" unattractive.
"Irregardless" is not a word.
Lmao 😂
Doesn't that mean regardfull, that's not even a word tho 😂
Women do not know they like you until they see you having fun. It has worked for over 4 decades for me. Do not waste time and money on the apps for a relationship. Most of those women have already done a bit too much.
Lets get real. Internet ruined dating.
Not really. The 50% of women that will gladly trade in a partner for something better is still the same today as yesterday.
Only now those types of women are all competing for the top 10% of men. Who rotate them out like a carrousel. The Bros are coming to the rescue and saving many men from these predators.
@@CornpopBadDude Yes really. The 50% of women that will trade you in are now holding a special device in their hand to let them search a 20 mile radius for anyone who will put up with her. HINT: this didn't help stabilize relationships.
@@CornpopBadDude 99% of women will gladly trade in a partner for something better. See definition of 'better'.
I was a gaming dork my whole life, then got some muscle mass snd bought a house. Despite balding severely and being only 5’10 I have much more luck with women than ever before.
Muscle mass and money are two pretty big difference makers👍, also 5'10" is perfectly fine lol, it's an acceptable height to like 85% of women. Only starts getting tough below 5'8".
The amount of rejection I had as a young man destroyed my self confidence forever. Even in the rare occasion a woman flirts with me, I look at trying to "pick them up" as guaranteed rejection. Hopefully with all these RUclips videos young men will be able to figure out what women want and have better luck. The future depends on it.
Nothing wrong with learning pickup and fucking a lot of chicks. It does wonders for your self-confidence no matter how shabbily you were treated when younger. Once you learn not to care about women's reactions to you because you know you can just get another one, that changes *everything* .
Good luck brother, it can be done, YOU can do it!
1. Get of RUclips
2. Go talk to actual women.
3. Why are you still reading this? Do you want to be like the guy in this video?
why would I 'talk to actual women'
Dumb
And face a sexual harassment charge? No thanks.
Ignorance is bliss!
Women spend hours painting their faces, picking out clothing and color coordinating things, getting their hair done, picking out perfumes. If men did the same in hopes of attracting a woman, the ratings for men may be way higher.
So i should buy makeup and use fake hair to look good?
@@29yyearsNo but spend time getting in shape, getting a haircut and wearing the right clothes
@@catsnatcher9197 Im in shape And fit have fitting clothes IT doesnt work at all. And Im bald So i get IT women dont like bald guys. Im 29.
Im using parfumes Always.
@@29yyears Well I don’t know you personally so its hard to give advice. Many women do like colognes if its the right one. Dont overdo it tho.
Can you grow a decent looking beard. A good beard can make you look better if you are bald
I started getting attractive after 30. Now I'm 34 still looking better day by day and getting attention of women from 20 to 40. I'm like what the hell is going on. This is surprising for me also.
Okay wait soooo what I'm getting is that baby faced women would have the longest lasting desirability?? ex: I always get mistaken as a high schooler even tho I'm mid 20s which means mid 30s I'd be around my prime??🤔
yes
Lol, aye. Hot women are not always hot, but cute women are always cute.
@@CoranceLChandler awww you right. A cute woman will eventually just become a cute grandma HAHA
@@RikusLategan yes that is true! Thanks for that perspective! I'm talking about solely looks here. Maturity in the partners' personality would require a whole other video haha
@@Kathayne636 glad to know I still got at least 10 of being in my prime. It'll be worth all the days of being mistaken as a high schooler🤧
As a man you receive attention from woman....NEVER!!!!!
as an *unattractive man, you mean
actually you do... probably from ugly women Or unattractive women
who has lower status than you, finds you attractive.
The problem here is that you don't notice cuz (We) as average men, we ignore them
and complaining that we can't find the "Pretty ones"
I did but I did put in a lot of work but it would good for me anyways win win
@@KaizenWithRen Not UN attractive. Women reject men who are NOT extremely attractive. This is the issue at hand.
Man attractiveness will change not according to age but wealthy
Cope
AWESOME VIDEO! subscribed!
Not at all surprising. But I've seen many other large studies which totally substantiate all my observations: height is king in women's eyes. And it's not really important in men's eyes. And I believe a good argument can be made that women are _more_ concerned with physical attractiveness. Perhaps men just know, consciously or subconsciously, it's no use to pursue the best-looking women. It (seggs) will never happen. But we cannot say the opposite. By the way, 'irregardless' is not a word.
As a guy who is tall and ugly, I can honestly say that height is definitely NOT king. I would say that height does matter but I've never been able to compete with shorter guys with prettier faces than I have.
Women that I’ve showed this to seem to hate some these stats, especially the divorce ones…..
The truth offends them.
Whoa, nice twist with the overlaid IQ graph! And the brain damaged analogy! *chef's kiss*
You just earned a subscription, buddy. Well done. Creative, engaging and insightful. Everything I like in a RUclips channel.
same here. He explained it nicely
The fairy tail about Beauty & Beast taught us one important lesson.
IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW YOU LOOK, HOW SMART YOU ARE, IF YOU HAVE A CASTLE WITH LOTS OF GOLD ROFL
Do not use dating app data to get an idea of what real life dating is like. It’s very different
It's a strong indicator though, since online matching is the increasingly dominant way to meet new people after graduating from school.
Most people meet online. A rising tide lifts all egos.
Hi, PhD in Soc Psych here - just don’t think too much about potential implications of this video for you: Both the „studies“ and their interpretation are cringeworthy and misleading 😂 This is complete YT bs-science at its worst 🎉
its concerning you have those qualifications if you are attempting to write off the presented data like that
@@ShortFuseFun No, he/she makes a valid point. The data come only from 2 studies while there are hundreds of similar ones all with slightly different conclusions. Some (obvious) principles are consistent (e.g. younger, richer, and/or better-looking people being more attractive on average), but nobody ever found a nuanced generalisable "formula of attractiveness". The comment above is trying to point out that while the data shown are true for a large population, they are being over interpreted when applied to the single individuals since they are simplified models that have some value only in a statistical sense
Came here to say a similar thing. This video from a scientific standpoint is downright negligent. Only cited 2 studies - and didn't even link the original studies. Further, WTH is happening at 2:10 ?? He says "although data was never posted, we can make a chart inferring on what he said". WTF is that?? You cant just make a visualization based on what someone said is a general trend. Absurd. When presenting the speed-dating study he only presented R coefficients - this is a measure of variance. It tells us very little about actual trend and direction, and the strength of that direction, only how close the data is to the line of best fit
Amazing video! Well explained and to the point. Good job!
The average dentist makes more money than most attorneys.
Yeah but they have such high rates of depression and suicide for whatever reason
wow seriously?
What about doctors ? I thought that surgeons were most desirable.
I love how well made this video is, great job 👍
These statistics show how the western societies have changed by feminism. I'm a 55 years old and 30 years ago things were very different. It was alot easier for a young man to find a date. I kinda feel sorry for young men today.
Another thing that changed is, women used to appreciate a compliment in person. Today, if she has ANY revealing quality she has been told 1000 times and expects in return a man with EVERY revealing quality.
Simple explanation for timing of men's primes:
Prime 1 (21-25): fun
Prime 2 (25-30): stable/dad
I’d say women peak at 18-20
Nah, they peak at ~22-25. Once they got their education sorted and are functional adults. Nobody wants to actual date / marry a 18-19 Yo.. they are literally teenagers.
@@L4verdz I 100% agree with you. I don't want to be mean but guys who said that women peak at 19 are probably never been with a women.
I have dated different women from different age and from my experience the women 18 to 20 years old are just child in an adult body. Now they are expections like always but most young women are just immature, you can't build a relationship let alone a family with the vast majority of them
I mean some of them can't even do basic cooking or drive a car i have seen this first hand 😂😂
Stopped watching this video after 90 seconds because the comments are WAY better. My advice...learn to love yourself FIRST, and remember that when you have a mate, you need your friends MORE, not less.
the video is statistics not advice
@@shaansingh6048 The video is opinion, not statistics. Neither the video nor the author's link provide any scientific data.
I am 35. I am screwed. I hope to become a desert monk now lol
Try ASMR .
Well, from now on you'll be more desirable than any woman your age will ever be
Holy shyt man, that is one hell of a big research you did. Since i don't know what else to say, i will simply say "Bravo".
Hope your channel grows and you find more material on how to solve some of modern society and dating issues, you got a knack for it.
I slept with 100+ women till 27. I am bellow average looks but i am 6'5 and i enyoj talking to them, you should lower the preatty ones and pedestal the ugly ones and they will like you. And never spend money on them, rule no.1.
hmm interesting, can you give more details
Money changes everything when it comes to gold diggers.
This is Brain Rot.
Women HATE data.
Confidence and trust also play a role I think. Confidence makes everyone more attractive, and trust holds the relationship together.
I'm 41, my girlfriend is 33 and while the interest was mutual, she's clearly the one who drove it in the beginning. We're both academics, well earning, met at work. I'm 6'2", she's 5'5".
if you were 5'6 you were single by now
@ivanovemanuelstefan5415 Maybe.
4:48 they did the first guy dirty putting him in the bottom 10% 😂 Dude looks easily average definitely not bottom 10 !!
My takeaway is that women want Prince Charming and men want a supermodel.
But men will settle. An average man foolishly looks in the mirror and says, gee I deserve an average woman. Not knowing that average women find him absolutely repulsive.
it's just natural selection
I actually think it's the other way - women want a male supermodel, men a gorgeous woman that will tend to them (Princess Charming?)
No, men find 61% of women attractive.
Women find 4% of men attractive.
Not the same.
Considering the offered statistic that all men are most attracted to women in their early twenties, and since most women can't stay in their early twenties forever, I think young women might want to prioritize finding a man who can be trusted to stay loyal to her forever after.
Interesting, I love the use of statistic to bring a different perspective to this topic
Note to self, never say that I work at the Hilton on dating apps
I think there is a bias: age is not important as a number, what is important is PERCEIVED age. So, as a man, if you are 30 but you look like 25, you're starting peaking. If you are 25 but look like 30, stay young, stay fit, stop smoking and stop drinking. I'm 33 and dating gets better every year. Had no chances at 25.