Timestamps 1). You struggle with low self-esteem 0:38 2). You withdraw from physical contact 1:29 3). You have brief or surface level relationships 2:09 4). You feel unable to express your needs 2:45 5). You are overly critical 3:19 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
Tbh I'm afraid of alot of social things like a relationship or friendships cuz I've seen alot of bad things like betrayal and rejection after all the good nice things I did ,i hate disappointments and I think what's more important is to focus on the career
Which mbti Type are U? Ever heared of headgehog Dilemma? Hurts to Bones If U want to Like and Love, but have probs with Accepting possibility of pain AS Well...
I really relate to this. I've never been in a relationship (I'm 24 btw), and I try not to let people get too close because I don't feel comfortable being vulnerable and opening up to people. I always tell myself that I'm not good enough and struggle with my self esteem. It's hard to open up cause it feels like no one truly cares. I feel for anyone else who feels this way and hope they can overcome these feelings.
Intimacy comes with a risk of harm (rejection, abandonment, controlling partner, abuse, etc…). Everyone on some level fears intimacy because of this risk. It doesn't necessarily mean they avoid it. Stories of fear depend on one’s experience with familiarity. People who have been hurt a lot often cope by avoiding intimacy. People who fear intimacy may feel a myriad of emotions. Some feel lonely because they want to be close but choose not to because they are afraid of being hurt. They may also feel conflicted on the inside. In new relationships, when they start to get close they may pull back or keep their partner at a distance. This often creates problems in the relationship because their partner experiences the double bind of being drawn in and pushed away. To overcome the fear of intimacy a person needs to overcome old hurts and learn from them. Also, this person must realize that there are safe people with whom they can enjoy an intimate relationship.
Dear wise Soul. Old unknown childhood Traumata. Indeed. Triggered by Events can Bring old unconcious forgotten pain at Table. When I worked trough that stuff, my fear nearly vanished. It was OK to allow yourself to BE afraid of new good experiences. ❣️🌏 If your Friends, Partner, anyone understands and really cares U, they will be patient and try to Help U Walking the new directions
@@ilikepancakes2368 did your past girlfriends really hurt you so bad? I feel hurt but, I understand. Not every woman is like that though. But sadly, some of them are, and they get more attention.
The general public doesn't care for intimacy except when both people have the "toxic good vibes" only tolerance is rare. People who stay when you're having a bad day are rare also. People honestly alot will berate you for being down or feeling lost... This is 100% the truth now especially in the USA!
People are the same around the universe... it's not about USA..good and bad things also...have Faith, keep praying, stay strong and everything will find its way to your life...sending you love and light from Greece on a beautiful sunny day,🙏🙏🥰🥰😘😘
I'm an INFP and this is something I am facing right now. I have never been in a relationship nor have I dated. Now that 'its time' to find a potential partner, I am struggling to the point that I have convinced myself that I can live alone as I always have. I cannot open up to my friends without fear of being judged. I feel my issues arent big enough to be discussed, or its easier to think that way to survive. I cannot open up to a therapist because I feel I'm exaggerating my feelings. I give platonic hugs to my friends that may last upto 2 seconds, other than that holding hands with my friends or parents makes me extremely uncomfortable.
Hey, I'm in a similar boat! Only I've started to see a therapist. While my main concern was that I never dated in my life, we are working through my childhood traumas whence my fear of emotional intimacy started. It's been an eye opener. The therapist loves your problems cause you're paying them, so they're just there to ask all the right questions to break through the cognitive distortions that you have about yourself and about the world. They're also there to explain aspects of family dysfunction. And my problems were way, way bigger than I thought or made them out to be. So I strongly recommend it! Like, to give an example, you say your issues aren't big enough to be discussed. Then, what IS an issue that is big enough to be discussed? What is an issue that is too small, but is discussed anyway among your friends or peers? Have you been taught as a child that your emotions were at any point unreasonable? That ANY emotion you had was "too big", in a way to invalidate you or the way you feel? (That's how they "control" you. Do you still want to be controlled by them?). Just questions to think about for yourself, you don't have to answer or anything, because obviously they're very personal. And I'm not a therapist or anything but questions similar to these have helped my "click" some lost or disconnected puzzle pieces inside my head. In my case, I had an abusive father, so I was kind of taught that if I was angry or upset there was something wrong with me and that it was my own fault I felt that way and that I was therefore bad somehow. And it all started with him simply barking at me, "stop crying!". SO compassionate, lol. Anyway, up to you, but I strongly recommend it!
Im an INFP and It’s the same for me. Its just imposible for me to open up about my feelings with anyone. My mind just tells me that Im being annoying and selfish, so I just stay quiet
I never noticed this But I think I might be afraid of Intimacy. I am Afraid of Relation Ships because every time I see one I always think "What is the point of being in a relationship if all it does is break your heart, get jugged by everyone around you, your parents make fun of you all the time, and what will you turn into"
I’ve always been afraid of intimacy. Ever since I was young I always hated physical touch and showed other small signs. As I got older I started to think something was wrong with me. I felt so alone and almost guilty for it. I’ve never been in a relationship before, but everything in this video describes my friendships. For example someone would want to give me a hug and I’ll either give them the most awkward side hug, or no hug. I’ve also always hid my emotions, no matter how close someone is too me. One time I broke my arm in front of people, and I didn’t even cry because I was afraid it would show my weakness side. I’ve also lost friends from my fear of intimacy. If I’m close to someone they’ll open up to me and tell me their feelings, but I’ll tell them nothing which makes them think I don’t trust them, which I don’t. And it’s not that I don’t love people or don’t want to love people, I really wish I could change, and I wish people could just know how much I try to show love. I honestly could give so many more examples. And I’ve always felt so alone because of this. But this video really helped me feel less alone, also reading the comments of how many other ppl struggle with this. If you’ve read this far, thank you. And I really do wanna let you know your not alone. ❤
I don't relate because I'm someone who loves intimacy and can get attached very quickly which is very bad. But you can always start doing little things you feel happy with, no need to make a huge leap. Like that I think you will start feeling better!
That’s because when you cried, nobody was there to comfort you. Or they told you to stop crying, or something bad will happen. Then you cry silently in your room in the dark because you feel ashamed for having feelings. At least that’s what happened to me.
You want connections? True, long-lasting connections? Get off Tinder, do your own thing, follow your interests (people included) and you'll stumble across them.
0:39 low self-esteem 1:30 withdraw physical contact 2:12 you have brief or surface level relationships 2:46 you feel unable to express your needs 3:21 your overly critical
@@pinkmeadows inf I See. Yea, Not easy If introverted, feeler and intuitive. Stay strong. Some will Take the time and effort to understand and treat U good and with respect and Care...It Just might Take longer, but faith is near 💝🌏☺️
This probably is the reason why I feel lonely even when there are people who are there for me and cares about me. I just didn't know how to feel safe in being vulnerable, feeling safe in forming deeper relationships with people and expressing my needs. My father was rather emotionally distant due to his job and financial issues with me.
It’s ironic… this is exactly how both my parents have treated me over the years, thus causing me to become _extremely_ uncomfortable with who I am during those crucial formative years (coming out to them being a particularly stressful phase, given one of my parents’ strong heteronormative values and close-minded tendencies). I’ve never been able to be 100% transparent around them without some semblance or notion of my interests, opinions, emotions, etc., being strange, uncouth, or just plain broken by whatever standards are in place, weakening my self-esteem and forcing me to adapt into something untrue of self. The fact I’m now on a seemingly personal crusade to fully embrace who I am, and to find those with whom I can be my quirky paradoxical self free from such toxic restraints, has yet to yield that long-sought and much-needed breakthrough, leaving me tilling the fields alone in the hope that a seed soon sprouts, at which point there’s no stopping that growth from happening… 🌳
@Xx BigBoss xX I didn’t own a phone growing up. No internet, either. The biggest preteen technological influence in our household was a Nintendo 64 console… and yes, it does feel like Nintendo were role models for part of that phase, so… 😅
I used to be like that, mainly because I have extremely low self-esteem regarding my body. My boyfriend is super patient and accepting. He loves me the way I am and compliments me all the time, which helped me a LOT. ❤❤❤
I have never even attempted to start a (romantic) relationship with anyone because I am so sure that when they finally saw me naked they would be disgusted.
@@FurryMeatloaf That's what I thought too, so I truly understand you:( I had always been terrified of physical intimacy before, also I didn't think I'd be anyone's type. What I took away from my case though is that whatever we feel terrible about is probably not as big of a thing as we think. I know it's hard to believe now (even for me, still), and it may take some time to muster up the courage to even try, and I know it's scary, but I just want you to know that there's hope🥺❤️ (If a relationship is what you'd like to have, of course.) Finding the right partner will help a lot - and you'll probably feel if they're the right one^^
The fear of the self, the dislike of the self, also can make ppl Push away. "They can Not Like and Love me for who I am"...(even though they did, I could Not See, because I was imprisoned in my own mind)
Maybe this helps U too. Most was unconcious. Understanding struggles with fear but also wanting to Connect with people at Same time. The more concious, the less fear, the more Love and Connection with self and Others possible 💝🌏😊 ruclips.net/video/5wAMqf6rilc/видео.html
It was the main reason why I didn't want to committ to a relationship. As soon as it was getting serious I shut down. But realising why and analysing my childhood helped me to understand why I was afraid. And now I'm in a relationship:-)
I can definitely identify with withdrawal from physical contact. I remember that ever since I was a little kid I hated to hold hands with others etc. But what I hated the most were hugs. I didn't like getting hugged by my parents or friends or any other person in my life. I still don't like getting hugged to this day, since it makes me feel somewhat trapped and helpless.
I could easily project my own thoughts and feelings on the matter and disregard the reasons why so many people fear this, but to tell the truth here, it's all comes down to one choice: do you truly want to live a happy life? Depending on the person's circumstances, I understand that it may take some time. Not all human beings are terrible, though. If anything, those who say and do terrible things need to learn a thing or two about being happy within themselves.
I definitely have some issues with physical contact and with discussing my needs, and what this video has really solidified for me is how deeply the shame I was raised to feel around physical romantic connections specifically has stuck with me into adulthood. Fantastic video!
Yes, that's me. Why? 1- Never been told how to build any relationships. 2- Never been told how to communicate as well as express emotions. 3- Never been accepted; others always treated me with suspicions. 4- Never been neither physically attractive nor rich enough. 5- Never been accepted by others with my whole set of features: Asperger's syndrome, introversion, my passions, political incorrectness, Faith and system of believe. Don't know how to fix it. I don't want to play someone else to be accepted and loved. Now I think love is not essential in life.
This video has truly opened up some things about myself. I've been like this since ever my friends become people who exploit other people's vulnerability. Although I still have hope that I will find the right person, After becoming a Good Person myself.
I normally struggle quite a bit with physical touch and sharing personal things partly due to being autistic as well as some other reasons. A while back I met a girl who is similar to me in some aspects and had way less difficulty in opening up and feeling comfortable. It still isn‘t easy but being around a supportive and understanding person helps a lot. Good luck on your journey and I hope you find people who you can open up to.
Of all of these I felt numbers 3 and 4 the most. I'm on the spectrum and incredibly sensitive to touch so the slightest rub in my direction can make me all jittery inside. I also get aroused very easily and I hate it being a guy who is straight since it has made becoming friends with women difficult as I have to hold back so much discomfort to avoid being seen as creepy. Getting close isn't the part I worry about, its communicating the boundaries surrounding my touch sensitivity. Whenever I jitter suddenly when touched in a sensitive area partners take it as a sign of nervousness and just break it off then and there. I just wish someone could be patient with me intimately so we could explore each other without jumping to conclusions.
What's super weird for me is that I can be as close as ever with my friends on a platonic level - to the point where people actually assume I'm dating them - but when it comes to someone I have a crush on who also likes me back, if we ever do go out I start to feel extremely uncomfortable. It's not new, it's been going on for YEARS at this point and it makes me avoid the topic of even getting into one because I don't want to feel very uncomfortable again and dump them after a day of dating them. It sucks a lot because as much as I want someone to be with, it makes me feel uncomfortable whenever this actually happens...
Yes! I was wondering if there was someone out there that felt a similar wy. I dont know why I'm like that and It's so strange how I can be friends but as soon as it goes in a romantic way I get super uncomfortable and distance myself. It's not really due to trauma or anything, I've always been like that. Have you?
I dated a girl on my school and she probably has the same problem. When she made distance but still gave signals that she liked me, I openend up to her completely because I thought I was to distant (she had like a rly big crush on me but it took me some time to open up). When I said that I liked her she blocked up completely, its extremely uncomfortable to be with her, even we secretly know we hiddenly like us, but on the surface we hate us, week after week we cant even talk normal to each other. Its just a tragedy, you get so distant to a person you once really had a very strong innitiate bound. To be honest it actually rly breaks my self-esteem and social skills, because I have the same problem but I shitted on my ego to just do it (showing my weaknesses), just to destroy everything. ^^ If she tried to open up to me I blocked, if I tried to open up she blocked. She was like acting rly pissed on me and running away, but I still stayed because I can look behind such surfaces, only to get one real smile after such torture but next week its exactly the same. Not worth. Sorry I tried, but I lost myself.
My boyfriend has the fear of intimacy, this video has perfectly fitted through all his traits. If someone here could tell me if I could help him somehow, what could I do?
Hi! I’m not an expert whatsoever, but I think the best thing you can do is just reassure him that it is okay to feel this way and maybe try to do things one day at a time until he feels comfortable enough to be more intimate with you. You seem like a wonderful person btw! 🤍
I'm 30. Male. Never been in a relationship. Virgin. A few women have shown romantic interest in the most subtle ways, but no matter what happens, I get scared. Very scared. I have no fear when it comes to have a physical fight with men. But when I look for love, I'm not much of a man. This hurts me a lot and I don't want to die alone. I'm going to see my psychiatrist this week. Maybe there is a solution for this. Your boyfriend should see a therapist too. That's all I can say
I have a close friend who gave off some signs that we could potentially go in a relationship, but noticed some days where they held back with like hand holding as we usually do. This video definitely gave an ease to me and am glad that I wasn't the reason that caused this slight unsureness Gives me even more reasons to be a patient and kind friend who'll be there for them no matter what, even if it means they have a slightly bad day, this video definitely was useful to me so thanks!! 💙💙
Wow, that’s actually really reassuring, that you’ll be there to guide your friend even when they’re going through a rough time. Your compassion and willingness to try to understand even if you don’t get it is admirable.
Due to a broken family I have fear of this. My broken family made me so emotionless. I'd constantly be told to shut up, to listen and obey, to not talk back, to not cry, and they'd hit me and my siblings when ever they are fighting or mad. Now that im almost an adult I have feeling that I would never get into a relationship. It is to much to handle and im afraid of fighting with someone constantly like my parents did. I'd rather be alone I don't crave any of this stuff and I'd only hate it even more if I was forcing myself to be in a relationship.
(type:INFP)Although ive never really had any bad experiences(meaning I never had an experience), ive seen and heard about others experiences and discourages me to even think about getting into a relationship(romantic wise). The possibility that I may get hurt is something that I cannot fathom, so I rather save myself from the potential hurt and focus on myself and my goals. Sometimes I do crave the closeness of others in a romantic way, but it’s something that I stopped myself from trying to pursue and tell myself that a romantic relationship is nothing but a distraction and feelings are uncontrollable. Im fine with rejection and disappointment because it’s always a learning experiment and something that I can control, but the fact that I can be hurt even though it may or may not be my fault is scary. EDIT: NVM IM INTJ IM SORRY
Sounds Like Shinji Ikari (Infp) from Neon Genesis Eva. Better Not watch, If U fear strong emotions...Ou dear, what emotional struggles infps with their vulnurable kind soul must Go trough. 🤧😢💝🌏 But infp Souls are so beautiful 🌟💝
Happened to stumble on this comment and you've described all my thoughts to a T, except that I see relationships being worthwhile but a huge gamble rather than a distraction. I'm an INFP myself and it's interesting (and shocking!) to see someone else thinks of this the same way. Furthermore, sexual desires is something I can't fulfil (and I see this as something inevitable in a relationship), only romantically. And therefore makes it much harder to see a relationship being a possibility. Rejection seems far less scary when other factors are considered.
@@itsnlee INFP here too. How did you describe my exact emotions and reasons as to why I'm avoiding getting into a relationship?! It's so weird how much you can have relate with a completely different person with a completely different life.
Yes think that way too yet I’m somehow in a relationship now 😅 it’s new to me and I’m scared a lot but I’m just trying to take things slow and trying to not worry about the future too much
+Psych2GoTv *Thanks for the list of symptoms for fear of intimacy:* 0:38 (1) Struggles with self-esteem 1:29 (2) Physical withdrawal 2:09 (3) Surface-level relations 2:45 (4) Agnossis of, and/or difficulty expressing, needs 3:20 (5) Hyper-critical self-mindset
My main thing is fearing that they'll show their true abusive and toxic nature when I let my guard down. Playing the role of "sweet and loving guy on the outside, and absolutely abusive and manipulative guy on the inside".
Once, when I saw someone getting attached to me after my bold proposal of being together I got a panic attack from which I was recovering for almost a week. This and the points mentioned in the video got me thinking that I may actually be afraid of intimacy or even love
I'm going to shower me with attention and my awareness. I'm going to give me a lot of my time. I'm going to be in physical proximity to me. I'm going to touch me, hold me, cuddle me. I'm going to try to connect with me physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually. I'm going to take good care of me. I'm going to care about my needs. I'm going to help me to meet my needs. I'm going to help me to survive. I'm going to shelter me from excessive suffering, fear and trauma. I'm going to have my back. I'm going to defend me and be loyal to me. I'm going to take on my agenda as my own. I'm going to make me an extension of you. I'm going to treat me as well as i would treat myself. I'm going to be happy for me when I succeed. I'm going to want for me what me most want for myself. I'm going to sacrifice for me and work on my behalf. I'm going to support me nurture me and encourage me. I'm going to cheerlead me. I'm going to encourage my self-exploration, self-expression and self-actualization. I'm going to respect my sovereignty as a consciousness. I'm not going to try to manipulate me, control me, dominate me or exploit me. I'm going to totally accept me and never judge me. I'm going to value me for my sake and appreciate me and see my intrinsic beauty. I'm not going to need anything from me and I'm not going to make me a tool to satisfy my own needs. I'm going to respect my point of view, wanting to understand my point of view, wanting to understand me, my uniqueness, taking the time to deeply get to know me. I'm not going to force your agenda or point of view on me. I'm going to listen to me and care about my interests and share similar interests with me. I'm going to develop togetherness with me and collaborate with me. I'm going to be there for me when i'm down and hopeless. I'm going to be there for me when I'm lonely. I'm going to validate my feelings, sharing my emotions with me, empathizing with me. My pain is going to be my pain. I'm going to meet me where I'm at, at my developmental level. I'm going to forgive me for my mistakes. I'm going to be patient with me. I'm going to see the good in me even when I don't see the good in myself. I'm going to be generous and kind. I'm going to give myself verbal approval and praise. I'm going to compliment me on my uniqueness. I'm going to keep my promises to me. I'm going to keep my peace with me, avoid conflict with me. I'm going to tell the truth to me. I'm going to be able to fully trust me and I'm never going to cash in on that trust. I'm going to see my realness, warts and shadow and all as I truly are. I'm going to deeply appreciate the finite portion of consciousness that me are and I'm going to accept my selfishness whenever me have the urge to be selfish. Now ask myself on a scale of 0 to 10 how loved do me feel? Open Your Eyes. 😂🦘🦘🧨
It's not that I'm afraid of physical contact - I really just have problems to put my sexuality on front. I'm a man, but I'm very cautious, reserved and trying to keep it low. So when I find someone attractive, it's more emotion than I can bear at a moment. I am afraid to encounter unsuspected moments, being under-prepared or trusting my partner in terms of sexual needs. Quite often, people judge my cautious behaviour on short notice, and I'm barely able to explain it because I'm just too confused by the sudden turn of events.
It would be nice to have a video with tips on how to get closer to people with these issues in a way that doesn't feel too scary or pressuring to them :)
I've had PTSD when I was a teen and was traumatized from both junior high and the internet. When I get close to others, hell even childhood friends from elementary, they break away and drift apart from me. On the internet, once I met people back then, it always seemed to go downhill. Once they find a fault within me or even find what I look like, they all ridicule me-like the months of friendship I had with them didn't matter. There was one case where I shared a picture with someone and they made it go viral on the website just to show how hideous I was. I literally hid in my closet after for the whole day. There were a couple of times that I allowed to get myself close to some people as an adult...like three or four times. Two times I have fond memories of, and the two times or so they just didn't really care.
Especially 1, *3* and to some level 5... I don't know why, I really matured in terms of assertiveness, so now I can communicate pretty well AT FIRST, but when the relationship deepens... whoa, I suddenly don't know what to do to really deepen it MORE and make it more intimate, not in a romantic way, just to, you know, make REAL friends (finally...). I'm not sure if it's about feeling too vulnerable (which in part it IS, for sure) of about me being lazy or afraid of COMMITMENT to others. When you want to be more intimate to someone but you don't see the same reciprocity, it's easy to assume they don't want you in their lives. Thus, why bother if that means rejection? Combined with a natural lack in interest to feel vulnerable once you experimented bullying and one of your parents being too stern and cold to you, and when you have experimented also rejection in almost every friendship (this. is. real, I'm not joking, and no, I'm not depressed or unhealthy, it's being a good while xD), it becomes kind of *creepy* that the thing never ends as you'd like... You might develop your social skills and feel proud about it, but then you reach an age in which is relatively hard to make an impact in other's life so that others are interested in you as a person. You now can be a great coworker or colleague in university, but then again it's difficult that, at that point, others want to make an(other) effort for you, as they already have their own circle of friends and family to care about. Being introvert (that's not a bad thing, but it carries some preferences) and lazy (or not having enough energy for whatever reason, it may be a synthom of an illness) definitely don't help either... *S H I T*
I don't really fear intimacy. I just have no expectation and feel any relationships mean meeting certain requirements and failing to meet any means I'm better off just keeping my distance in all areas until proven or just abandon ship as soon it goes south. In other words. -Fear of failure + Perfectionism -Feeling unworthy
True FRIENDSHIP should not be looked upon as someone “afraid to be intimate”. If someone is honestly satisfied with going no further than a certain point in their human relationships, that’s not automatically a bad thing. Everyone on earth does not necessarily need someone up in their mind 24/7. Let’s not knock the “Cool, Calm & Collected” set!
I tried to to be with someone like that. I awlays felt that we were constantly been pushing away from each other, but I was kinda passionate with her, so I tried to help with her problems (such as low self esteem, anxiety, depression) and make a comfortable enviroment, but I couldnt make a good diference, probably because I had a low self esteem too. At least we both had grown a little together, ee learnt some things, and now she is moving for another school, hope everything goes better for her there. (Sorry if I messed up something, im brazillian and still learning english)
I was just shut down by someone who I tried open up to about being terrified of intimacy. She made me feel so alien and strange for being afraid of getting close. Watching this video and reading all of the comments has made me feel much better about myself. I literally fit all five signs The last time somebody tried to hug me I was so uncomfortable I was physically twitching. Thank you all for sharing your stories, I feel not alone. 🙂
It's been like this for almost the 20 years of my life and, honestly, I'm so sick and tired of it. It's a lonely and miserable situation, I WANT to make friends or have a "special someone", if that's possible, but I can't seem to form a genuine, deep relationship or to stop pushing people away because of this paralyzing fear of rejection and betrayal. At this point, this makes me question a lot if it's even worthy being alive anymore (since I'm also not great at anything else, not even at overcoming this fear and it would be better without me being a inconvenience).
Please do not think like that. I am sure you are a wonderful person and you are great at many things. You might not see it right now but you are absolutely worthy of love and friendship and all happy things in life. Please do not give up and search for help - might it be a family member or professional therapist. I myself was at this point two years ago and it was scary back then. Right now I am much better (still no romantic relationship in sight but some colleagues and I are friendly and sometimes go out for coffee). It takes time and a lot of effort but it is worth it in the end. So please - do not give up hope! ❤
I'm not sure if that's the reason I don't wanna be in a relationship, cause it sounds like me, but at the same time.. my thought process is different. I know that I tend to be like that - one day I'm very open and passionate, then I ignore this person for like 2 weeks. I know that if I'm gonna date with this person then I'm gonna be the toxic one to them, so I'm not even going to try. I don't want to hurt them by always making them wait for me and making them babysit my mental health cause this is something that I should deal with by myself. That said person also have the hero complex and he's always putting problems of others above his, I don't want to put myself as his responsibility. That's why even tho I like him a lot, I'm not gonna try anything
4 out of the 5 hit hard. I have a therapist does that count as someone like a mental provider cause I think this is something I want to bring up in one of my sessions
The only kind of intimacy I have discomfort with is the sexual kind. I can be vulnerable talking about my issues or things with some people no problem, and I know I deserve to be loved, but I don't necessarily need it.. the love I already have from friends my dog and some family is plenty.
I've noticed that I have a problem with communication during the beginning stages of my relationships. I'm not one to text first usually and if it's a new relationship especially, I just get kinda spacey and don't focus on texting that person. So, it probably looks like I'm pushing them away or keeping them at a comfortable distance. I do find myself relating to some of the points made here, but the only one I didn't was the one about physical contact. Like, I hug as a greeting, just full-on. I'm not too shy to hold hands, although it might be false confidence getting me to do this. Idk 🤷♀️
I love these little shorts I have learned a lot about myself that I have a lot of issues with myself I've been in a horrible 7-year relationship and it was very abusive I realized after this relationship has been over for 2 years and he is in prison I have this fear of being loved I don't know how to accept it I want to give it but I have to give myself love first I don't know how to share it and I don't know how to receive it I have a lot of problems I have a lot of anger issues too and I really see a lot of myself and a lot of your videos but I love watching them and I thank you for putting them here much love and happy New years
🌏Oh Shit thx....Indeed. Hits my Core. Shinji, Asuka, Misato, Ayanami...Who knows Headgehog Dilemma Neon Genesis?🌐🥴 Thx so much psyc2go for this topic 💝
Thanks to a combination of abuse and childhood trauma, I was never able to build the sort of skills necessary to both pick and sustain positive and healthy intimate relationships and following the end of what was ultimately a very toxic marriage over a decade ago, I tried to give it one more shot with someone I'd genuinely grown to love very much. That ended so disastrously that after that, I gave up entirely on the notion of relationships entirely, to say nothing of intimacy. While I'm in therapy now working through all that, it's hard not to avoid the common stigma that my fear of intimacy, which is built on a lifetime of trauma, guilt and shame, leads to people wanting to just brand me an 'InCel' instead. I'd appreciate it if you guys did a video/short explaining the very real differences between the two, and keep doing what you're doing!
This video is about me. I recently realized - being a 32 years old man - that I always had SPD - Schizoid Personality Disorder. I was not able to meaningfully connect with other people as if I didn't have "software" for such action. I couldn't even imagine it. All my relationships were shallow. I always had this passive, reactive, shallow and anxious attachment - because I lacked an integrated active side of my own self. If I were to explain it in simpler terms, I feared intimacy (while not being fully aware of it), because on my side there was nothing for the other person to connect to in a way that was safe or meaningful for me, as I lacked my own expectations for an intimate bond (fear of engulfment, appropriation). All of this was largely UNCONSCIOUS - I did not even know I had any kind of problem. I just lived completely alone and detached from other people and was content with that... I felt like other people had nothing meaningful for me to add to my life, as well as I felt like I have nothing to give myself. It did not seem like a problem to me, like other people with personality disorders (NPD, BPD), I was not self-aware and neither was able nor willing to self-reflect. Even my self-reflections were shallow and fragmentary. I did not feel lonely, for the most part. Until a little more than a year ago, I started feeling emotions I have never had. For the first time in my life I was feeling like interacting with other people was pleasant to me. Something that I imagine even children in the kindergarten are able to feel (I was always playing alone and was very quiet, even in the kindergarten). It was extremely shocking to me. 2022 was an intense year for me. I had a depression and had to experience the death of my false schizoid ego, as well as the emergence of my real ego. To compound this, I had an extremely painful and disappointing relationship with a girl, who turned out to be extremely narcissistic. This was a difficult year. I learned so much. I am still lonely, but I hope I will have more luck in the future.
Good luck to you! You seem to be at the level of mindfulness where you can describe your issue with so much detail, and you deserve better chances to find good people to connect to. It was extremely interesting to read your comment.
@@A.M....... I think with thinking our own Feelings and Thoughts are the "right" ones, without asking and considering the world outside our own mind...ask people directly about their Feelings and thoughts might Help to Connect in deeper honest Level. But First we need to learn talking communicating about our own Vulnurability in Order to See and embrace, understand that the outside world, every human IS vulnurable AS Well. Ego might be harsh and critical towards self and Others, the authentic Soul can embrace Everything there IS, without judgement or pushaway. So the Soul IS soft and strong at Same time. For me IT was helpful Accepting and embracing myself First, with whatever there was, in Order to be more opened Up to the outside world. First I was Like a constantly fighting Eva 02 batteling the self and Others, fighting to be Loved and Liked, but I was Not able to Accept and Like myself First, It was Long process...and Lots Had to do with old Traumatic unseen childhood Traumata, Which I did Not know at the beginning, but cognitive behavior Therapy cbt, Lots If Training, helped Lots. And It still can Happen, that some old trauma might appears anywhere, but now you learned to calm yourself, learned to communicate and Go trough hard Times together. Fearful, Avoidant, FearfulAvoidant and Secure Attachments. A therapist sayed, that about 50 percent have No Secure Attachment learned during childhood and therefore having troubles with deeper Connection later in Life...maybe this knowledge might Help you, for me this knowledge Had massive Impact. Same with the thought of "Fear of society". I did Not fear society, but learned that I was an Introverted Extrovert, who Not much learned what It feels Like being emotionally touched by Others, allowing myself to be vulnurable and soft. I See there Many Walls falling and many latebloomers currently. Best wishes at your journeys 🌏❣️😊
There are times where I feared intimacy. When there’s someone I like, I would want to hug them, but I held back because I was scared. I feel the same thing if it’s the other way around.
I love being touched! I adore that feeling personally. Sadly, no one ever seems to want to get close enough to me emotionally for that. I don't even look for relationships or anything. I have taught myself to ignore any signs that someone might like me. I figure they just intend to mess with me so I don't bother looking into it. It's all I know so I figure I will die alone. That's life.
Sounds as If your realm IS more thinking one. Greets from an overthinker. Can be hell in own mind If its running in cycles. My Saviors are NeTe and my demon was Fi. Which mbti are U?
i really see myself in this. follow for a long time already but didn't watch the videos. I felt to anxious to get my own issues pointed out or might find even more.
I love how you not only do these videos to help others but also incorporate characters from other shows and games to further strengthen your messages. Thanks for that :) I see that Wanderer
I always feel ashamed and embarrassed. If I am being honest I never knew it was a problem with intimacy. I always felt something was wrong and pulled away. I never felt like I was making my girlfriend happy and even now I still push them away until they hate me. And I just truly never understood why. If it was just depression or maybe something else that I didn't understand. I know how to smile and hold hands, but...whenever I go to sleep at night my chest, heart, soul (you pick) hurts. It hurts, but put yourself in their shoes. They don't know or understand what is going on, especially whenever you are always smiling.
Clever inclusion of Eda and Raine! I gasped. Wild how if I had watched this video two weeks ago I wouldn’t have gotten the reference. On that note, though - a fear of intimacy has definitely been a huge factor in the dissolution of my relationships with friends, family, and partners over the past few decades. Whoops.
I'm going to shower you with attention and my awareness. I'm going to give you a lot of my time. I'm going to be in physical proximity to you. I'm going to touch you, hold you, cuddle you. I'm going to try to connect with you physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually. I'm going to take good care of you. I'm going to care about your needs. I'm going to help you to meet your needs. I'm going to help you to survive. I'm going to shelter you from excessive suffering, fear and trauma. I'm going to have your back. I'm going to defend you and be loyal to you. I'm going to take on your agenda as my own. I'm going to make you an extension of me. I'm going to treat you as well as i would treat myself. I'm going to be happy for you when you succeed. I'm going to want for you what you most want for yourself. I'm going to sacrifice for you and work on your behalf. I'm going to support you nurture you and encourage you. I'm going to cheerlead you. I'm going to encourage your self-exploration, self-expression and self-actualization. I'm going to respect your sovereignty as a consciousness. I'm not going to try to manipulate you, control you, dominate you or exploit you. I'm going to totally accept you and never judge you. I'm going to value you for your sake and appreciate you and see your intrinsic beauty. I'm not going to need anything from you and I'm not going to make you a tool to satisfy my own needs. I'm going to respect your point of view, wanting to understand your point of view, wanting to understand you, your uniqueness, taking the time to deeply get to know you. I'm not going to force my agenda or point of view on you. I'm going to listen to you and care about your interests and share similar interests with you. I'm going to develop togetherness with you and collaborate with you. I'm going to be there for you when you're down and hopeless. I'm going to be there for you when you're lonely. I'm going to validate your feelings, sharing your emotions with you, empathizing with you. Your pain is going to be my pain. I'm going to meet you where you're at, at your developmental level. I'm going to forgive you for your mistakes. I'm going to be patient with you. I'm going to see the good in you even when you don't see the good in yourself. I'm going to be generous and kind. I'm going to give you verbal approval and praise. I'm going to compliment you on your uniqueness. I'm going to keep my promises to you. I'm going to keep my peace with you, avoid conflict with you. I'm going to tell the truth to you. You're going to be able to fully trust me and I'm never going to cash in on that trust. I'm going to see your realness, warts and shadow and all as you truly are. I'm going to deeply appreciate the finite portion of consciousness that you are and I'm going to accept your selfishness whenever you have the urge to be selfish. Now ask yourself on a scale of 0 to 10 how loved do you feel? Open Your Eyes. 😂🦘🦘🧨
Sorry but even tho the content is really good while i listen to it ....I COULDN'T TAKE IT THAT SERIOUS WHEN I SAW THE GENSHIN IMPACT CHARACTERS XD SORRY ASDFGHJKL
1:29 I really do want to have physical contact with someone at school, since i mostly see her at school and don't really get too have meet-ups whenever im going out with friends. Its just that it might be a bit awkward approaching her physically with the friends around and because of public display of affection. Or somthin like that, idk. Great video btw, i gotta say.
Happy 2023, Psych2Go! May this year be filled with happiness and success as you spread mental awareness to people everyday.
that's so sweet of you I am wish the same thing!
Likewise to you too! Sending posivity your way :)
Happy New year to you to
Jolly holidays!
Timestamps
1). You struggle with low self-esteem 0:38
2). You withdraw from physical contact 1:29
3). You have brief or surface level relationships 2:09
4). You feel unable to express your needs 2:45
5). You are overly critical 3:19
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
Thank You! 😁
Y’know I sorta feel like a certain Disney Prince has the topic of this video as his character.
Ty
thanks
My god, I’m all 5 of those
Tbh I'm afraid of alot of social things like a relationship or friendships cuz I've seen alot of bad things like betrayal and rejection after all the good nice things I did ,i hate disappointments and I think what's more important is to focus on the career
Which mbti Type are U? Ever heared of headgehog Dilemma? Hurts to Bones If U want to Like and Love, but have probs with Accepting possibility of pain AS Well...
Reality is often disappointing - Thanos.
But in all seriousness, i literally have nothing either due to my kindness i used to show.
@@gamer22ftw well said
I can truly relate to you :")
yup
I really relate to this. I've never been in a relationship (I'm 24 btw), and I try not to let people get too close because I don't feel comfortable being vulnerable and opening up to people. I always tell myself that I'm not good enough and struggle with my self esteem. It's hard to open up cause it feels like no one truly cares. I feel for anyone else who feels this way and hope they can overcome these feelings.
Intimacy comes with a risk of harm (rejection, abandonment, controlling partner, abuse, etc…). Everyone on some level fears intimacy because of this risk. It doesn't necessarily mean they avoid it. Stories of fear depend on one’s experience with familiarity. People who have been hurt a lot often cope by avoiding intimacy.
People who fear intimacy may feel a myriad of emotions. Some feel lonely because they want to be close but choose not to because they are afraid of being hurt. They may also feel conflicted on the inside. In new relationships, when they start to get close they may pull back or keep their partner at a distance. This often creates problems in the relationship because their partner experiences the double bind of being drawn in and pushed away.
To overcome the fear of intimacy a person needs to overcome old hurts and learn from them. Also, this person must realize that there are safe people with whom they can enjoy an intimate relationship.
Dear wise Soul. Old unknown childhood Traumata. Indeed. Triggered by Events can Bring old unconcious forgotten pain at Table. When I worked trough that stuff, my fear nearly vanished. It was OK to allow yourself to BE afraid of new good experiences. ❣️🌏 If your Friends, Partner, anyone understands and really cares U, they will be patient and try to Help U Walking the new directions
All my past hurt taught me was that you can never trust women 😂.
@@ilikepancakes2368 did your past girlfriends really hurt you so bad?
I feel hurt but, I understand. Not every woman is like that though. But sadly, some of them are, and they get more attention.
@@ilikepancakes2368 I'v learned to never trust MEN!
@@monaebreak561 sounds like both of you would be good together x)
The general public doesn't care for intimacy except when both people have the "toxic good vibes" only tolerance is rare. People who stay when you're having a bad day are rare also. People honestly alot will berate you for being down or feeling lost...
This is 100% the truth now especially in the USA!
😭People who stay and Stick with U in Bad and in good Times, how rare. 🌟
People are the same around the universe... it's not about USA..good and bad things also...have Faith, keep praying, stay strong and everything will find its way to your life...sending you love and light from Greece on a beautiful sunny day,🙏🙏🥰🥰😘😘
I'm an INFP and this is something I am facing right now. I have never been in a relationship nor have I dated. Now that 'its time' to find a potential partner, I am struggling to the point that I have convinced myself that I can live alone as I always have. I cannot open up to my friends without fear of being judged. I feel my issues arent big enough to be discussed, or its easier to think that way to survive. I cannot open up to a therapist because I feel I'm exaggerating my feelings. I give platonic hugs to my friends that may last upto 2 seconds, other than that holding hands with my friends or parents makes me extremely uncomfortable.
Hey, I'm in a similar boat! Only I've started to see a therapist. While my main concern was that I never dated in my life, we are working through my childhood traumas whence my fear of emotional intimacy started. It's been an eye opener. The therapist loves your problems cause you're paying them, so they're just there to ask all the right questions to break through the cognitive distortions that you have about yourself and about the world. They're also there to explain aspects of family dysfunction. And my problems were way, way bigger than I thought or made them out to be. So I strongly recommend it!
Like, to give an example, you say your issues aren't big enough to be discussed. Then, what IS an issue that is big enough to be discussed? What is an issue that is too small, but is discussed anyway among your friends or peers? Have you been taught as a child that your emotions were at any point unreasonable? That ANY emotion you had was "too big", in a way to invalidate you or the way you feel? (That's how they "control" you. Do you still want to be controlled by them?). Just questions to think about for yourself, you don't have to answer or anything, because obviously they're very personal. And I'm not a therapist or anything but questions similar to these have helped my "click" some lost or disconnected puzzle pieces inside my head.
In my case, I had an abusive father, so I was kind of taught that if I was angry or upset there was something wrong with me and that it was my own fault I felt that way and that I was therefore bad somehow. And it all started with him simply barking at me, "stop crying!". SO compassionate, lol.
Anyway, up to you, but I strongly recommend it!
I just want to thank you for taking the time to write this comment, because it resonated with me to an extent that I’d forgotten was possible
Same 👍
Im an INFP and It’s the same for me. Its just imposible for me to open up about my feelings with anyone. My mind just tells me that Im being annoying and selfish, so I just stay quiet
@@cayetanagarcia3313 Wait… I too am an INFP. Is this just an INFP thing? 🤔
I never noticed this But I think I might be afraid of Intimacy. I am Afraid of Relation Ships because every time I see one I always think "What is the point of being in a relationship if all it does is break your heart, get jugged by everyone around you, your parents make fun of you all the time, and what will you turn into"
i’ve been in denial for so long about being afraid of intimacy i think this is my final realization 😭😭
Me too 😭 I like the idea of it but when it comes to real life it’s scaryyy
I’ve always been afraid of intimacy. Ever since I was young I always hated physical touch and showed other small signs. As I got older I started to think something was wrong with me. I felt so alone and almost guilty for it. I’ve never been in a relationship before, but everything in this video describes my friendships. For example someone would want to give me a hug and I’ll either give them the most awkward side hug, or no hug. I’ve also always hid my emotions, no matter how close someone is too me. One time I broke my arm in front of people, and I didn’t even cry because I was afraid it would show my weakness side. I’ve also lost friends from my fear of intimacy. If I’m close to someone they’ll open up to me and tell me their feelings, but I’ll tell them nothing which makes them think I don’t trust them, which I don’t. And it’s not that I don’t love people or don’t want to love people, I really wish I could change, and I wish people could just know how much I try to show love. I honestly could give so many more examples. And I’ve always felt so alone because of this. But this video really helped me feel less alone, also reading the comments of how many other ppl struggle with this. If you’ve read this far, thank you. And I really do wanna let you know your not alone. ❤
I don't relate because I'm someone who loves intimacy and can get attached very quickly which is very bad. But you can always start doing little things you feel happy with, no need to make a huge leap. Like that I think you will start feeling better!
Sounds like an avoidant attachment style to me
Read anxiously attached by Jessica Baum
i can relate fully, ive lost so many friendships and i never cry in front of anyone, to the point where at my family members funeral i barely cried.
I completely and fully relate to all of this and I wish more people would understand this!
That’s because when you cried, nobody was there to comfort you. Or they told you to stop crying, or something bad will happen. Then you cry silently in your room in the dark because you feel ashamed for having feelings. At least that’s what happened to me.
Some of us aren't accepted and with how toxic hookup culture is now, sex is easy connections aren't.
You want connections? True, long-lasting connections? Get off Tinder, do your own thing, follow your interests (people included) and you'll stumble across them.
0:39 low self-esteem
1:30 withdraw physical contact
2:12 you have brief or surface level relationships
2:46 you feel unable to express your needs
3:21 your overly critical
This is so me. attempted to be vulnerable in the past and it went far left. been silent/distant ever since😔
🤧😭Infp?
@@SeelenTaucher
eh..somewhat. a bit more like infj.
@@pinkmeadows inf I See. Yea, Not easy If introverted, feeler and intuitive. Stay strong. Some will Take the time and effort to understand and treat U good and with respect and Care...It Just might Take longer, but faith is near 💝🌏☺️
@@SeelenTaucher
thx u 😌 I try everyday bc I know there's good in the world🙏
@@pinkmeadows 💝🌟🌏😊
This probably is the reason why I feel lonely even when there are people who are there for me and cares about me. I just didn't know how to feel safe in being vulnerable, feeling safe in forming deeper relationships with people and expressing my needs. My father was rather emotionally distant due to his job and financial issues with me.
It’s ironic… this is exactly how both my parents have treated me over the years, thus causing me to become _extremely_ uncomfortable with who I am during those crucial formative years (coming out to them being a particularly stressful phase, given one of my parents’ strong heteronormative values and close-minded tendencies).
I’ve never been able to be 100% transparent around them without some semblance or notion of my interests, opinions, emotions, etc., being strange, uncouth, or just plain broken by whatever standards are in place, weakening my self-esteem and forcing me to adapt into something untrue of self.
The fact I’m now on a seemingly personal crusade to fully embrace who I am, and to find those with whom I can be my quirky paradoxical self free from such toxic restraints, has yet to yield that long-sought and much-needed breakthrough, leaving me tilling the fields alone in the hope that a seed soon sprouts, at which point there’s no stopping that growth from happening… 🌳
@Xx BigBoss xX I didn’t own a phone growing up. No internet, either. The biggest preteen technological influence in our household was a Nintendo 64 console… and yes, it does feel like Nintendo were role models for part of that phase, so… 😅
I used to be like that, mainly because I have extremely low self-esteem regarding my body. My boyfriend is super patient and accepting. He loves me the way I am and compliments me all the time, which helped me a LOT. ❤❤❤
I have never even attempted to start a (romantic) relationship with anyone because I am so sure that when they finally saw me naked they would be disgusted.
@@FurryMeatloaf That's what I thought too, so I truly understand you:( I had always been terrified of physical intimacy before, also I didn't think I'd be anyone's type. What I took away from my case though is that whatever we feel terrible about is probably not as big of a thing as we think. I know it's hard to believe now (even for me, still), and it may take some time to muster up the courage to even try, and I know it's scary, but I just want you to know that there's hope🥺❤️ (If a relationship is what you'd like to have, of course.) Finding the right partner will help a lot - and you'll probably feel if they're the right one^^
Fear destroys love🙏
But i do have a reason to fear. Certain events transpired in order to make that so.
THEN I AM FEAR
Eh
The fear of the self, the dislike of the self, also can make ppl Push away. "They can Not Like and Love me for who I am"...(even though they did, I could Not See, because I was imprisoned in my own mind)
Maybe this helps U too. Most was unconcious. Understanding struggles with fear but also wanting to Connect with people at Same time. The more concious, the less fear, the more Love and Connection with self and Others possible 💝🌏😊 ruclips.net/video/5wAMqf6rilc/видео.html
Yup, that's me. I exhibit all 5 signs. Great video and very amazing explanation.
It was the main reason why I didn't want to committ to a relationship. As soon as it was getting serious I shut down.
But realising why and analysing my childhood helped me to understand why I was afraid.
And now I'm in a relationship:-)
Way to go buddy!
@@juliastoeckl3035 What do you mean?
@@marquisdehoto1638 i think you took big steps and its more or less a way to say that I'm proud of you
I have been trying to confront this fear for a long time, but I am coming around! Thanks to channels like yours; so thanks
I can definitely identify with withdrawal from physical contact.
I remember that ever since I was a little kid I hated to hold hands with others etc.
But what I hated the most were hugs.
I didn't like getting hugged by my parents or friends or any other person in my life.
I still don't like getting hugged to this day, since it makes me feel somewhat trapped and helpless.
yes, since a toxic relationship over 20 years ago.
I could easily project my own thoughts and feelings on the matter and disregard the reasons why so many people fear this, but to tell the truth here, it's all comes down to one choice: do you truly want to live a happy life? Depending on the person's circumstances, I understand that it may take some time. Not all human beings are terrible, though. If anything, those who say and do terrible things need to learn a thing or two about being happy within themselves.
SCARACOOCHIE MAKING AN APPEARANCE!!!!!!
I love the Genshin references.
I definitely have some issues with physical contact and with discussing my needs, and what this video has really solidified for me is how deeply the shame I was raised to feel around physical romantic connections specifically has stuck with me into adulthood. Fantastic video!
Thank you Psych2Go for using The Owl House as an example🤣🤣
Yes, that's me. Why?
1- Never been told how to build any relationships.
2- Never been told how to communicate as well as express emotions.
3- Never been accepted; others always treated me with suspicions.
4- Never been neither physically attractive nor rich enough.
5- Never been accepted by others with my whole set of features: Asperger's syndrome, introversion, my passions, political incorrectness, Faith and system of believe.
Don't know how to fix it. I don't want to play someone else to be accepted and loved.
Now I think love is not essential in life.
The fact that Scara showed up when she talked abt thinking that you don't deserve to be loved :((((
fr
This video has truly opened up some things about myself. I've been like this since ever my friends become people who exploit other people's vulnerability. Although I still have hope that I will find the right person, After becoming a Good Person myself.
I normally struggle quite a bit with physical touch and sharing personal things partly due to being autistic as well as some other reasons. A while back I met a girl who is similar to me in some aspects and had way less difficulty in opening up and feeling comfortable. It still isn‘t easy but being around a supportive and understanding person helps a lot. Good luck on your journey and I hope you find people who you can open up to.
@@guntera3845 It must have been hard for you to deal with those while having a condition, Good Luck Too!
Of all of these I felt numbers 3 and 4 the most. I'm on the spectrum and incredibly sensitive to touch so the slightest rub in my direction can make me all jittery inside. I also get aroused very easily and I hate it being a guy who is straight since it has made becoming friends with women difficult as I have to hold back so much discomfort to avoid being seen as creepy.
Getting close isn't the part I worry about, its communicating the boundaries surrounding my touch sensitivity. Whenever I jitter suddenly when touched in a sensitive area partners take it as a sign of nervousness and just break it off then and there. I just wish someone could be patient with me intimately so we could explore each other without jumping to conclusions.
That owl house reference was perfect for describing number 4.
What's super weird for me is that I can be as close as ever with my friends on a platonic level - to the point where people actually assume I'm dating them - but when it comes to someone I have a crush on who also likes me back, if we ever do go out I start to feel extremely uncomfortable. It's not new, it's been going on for YEARS at this point and it makes me avoid the topic of even getting into one because I don't want to feel very uncomfortable again and dump them after a day of dating them. It sucks a lot because as much as I want someone to be with, it makes me feel uncomfortable whenever this actually happens...
Yes! I was wondering if there was someone out there that felt a similar wy. I dont know why I'm like that and It's so strange how I can be friends but as soon as it goes in a romantic way I get super uncomfortable and distance myself. It's not really due to trauma or anything, I've always been like that. Have you?
Same me too! Why do we feel this and where does this come from?
I dated a girl on my school and she probably has the same problem. When she made distance but still gave signals that she liked me, I openend up to her completely because I thought I was to distant (she had like a rly big crush on me but it took me some time to open up). When I said that I liked her she blocked up completely, its extremely uncomfortable to be with her, even we secretly know we hiddenly like us, but on the surface we hate us, week after week we cant even talk normal to each other. Its just a tragedy, you get so distant to a person you once really had a very strong innitiate bound. To be honest it actually rly breaks my self-esteem and social skills, because I have the same problem but I shitted on my ego to just do it (showing my weaknesses), just to destroy everything. ^^
If she tried to open up to me I blocked, if I tried to open up she blocked. She was like acting rly pissed on me and running away, but I still stayed because I can look behind such surfaces, only to get one real smile after such torture but next week its exactly the same. Not worth. Sorry I tried, but I lost myself.
do you know what the word aromantic means
My boyfriend has the fear of intimacy, this video has perfectly fitted through all his traits. If someone here could tell me if I could help him somehow, what could I do?
Hi! I’m not an expert whatsoever, but I think the best thing you can do is just reassure him that it is okay to feel this way and maybe try to do things one day at a time until he feels comfortable enough to be more intimate with you. You seem like a wonderful person btw! 🤍
I'm 30. Male. Never been in a relationship. Virgin. A few women have shown romantic interest in the most subtle ways, but no matter what happens, I get scared. Very scared. I have no fear when it comes to have a physical fight with men. But when I look for love, I'm not much of a man. This hurts me a lot and I don't want to die alone. I'm going to see my psychiatrist this week. Maybe there is a solution for this. Your boyfriend should see a therapist too. That's all I can say
I have a close friend who gave off some signs that we could potentially go in a relationship, but noticed some days where they held back with like hand holding as we usually do. This video definitely gave an ease to me and am glad that I wasn't the reason that caused this slight unsureness
Gives me even more reasons to be a patient and kind friend who'll be there for them no matter what, even if it means they have a slightly bad day, this video definitely was useful to me so thanks!! 💙💙
Awww that’s so sweet
Wow, that’s actually really reassuring, that you’ll be there to guide your friend even when they’re going through a rough time. Your compassion and willingness to try to understand even if you don’t get it is admirable.
Due to a broken family I have fear of this. My broken family made me so emotionless. I'd constantly be told to shut up, to listen and obey, to not talk back, to not cry, and they'd hit me and my siblings when ever they are fighting or mad. Now that im almost an adult I have feeling that I would never get into a relationship. It is to much to handle and im afraid of fighting with someone constantly like my parents did. I'd rather be alone I don't crave any of this stuff and I'd only hate it even more if I was forcing myself to be in a relationship.
I already knew I had intimacy issues, but I watched the video anyway 😊 I just love your videos
(type:INFP)Although ive never really had any bad experiences(meaning I never had an experience), ive seen and heard about others experiences and discourages me to even think about getting into a relationship(romantic wise). The possibility that I may get hurt is something that I cannot fathom, so I rather save myself from the potential hurt and focus on myself and my goals. Sometimes I do crave the closeness of others in a romantic way, but it’s something that I stopped myself from trying to pursue and tell myself that a romantic relationship is nothing but a distraction and feelings are uncontrollable. Im fine with rejection and disappointment because it’s always a learning experiment and something that I can control, but the fact that I can be hurt even though it may or may not be my fault is scary.
EDIT: NVM IM INTJ IM SORRY
Sounds Like Shinji Ikari (Infp) from Neon Genesis Eva. Better Not watch, If U fear strong emotions...Ou dear, what emotional struggles infps with their vulnurable kind soul must Go trough. 🤧😢💝🌏 But infp Souls are so beautiful 🌟💝
I relate so much to everything u said, opening up is so scary to me.. maybe someday, working on myself:) INFP as well btw haha
Happened to stumble on this comment and you've described all my thoughts to a T, except that I see relationships being worthwhile but a huge gamble rather than a distraction. I'm an INFP myself and it's interesting (and shocking!) to see someone else thinks of this the same way. Furthermore, sexual desires is something I can't fulfil (and I see this as something inevitable in a relationship), only romantically. And therefore makes it much harder to see a relationship being a possibility. Rejection seems far less scary when other factors are considered.
@@itsnlee INFP here too. How did you describe my exact emotions and reasons as to why I'm avoiding getting into a relationship?! It's so weird how much you can have relate with a completely different person with a completely different life.
Yes think that way too yet I’m somehow in a relationship now 😅 it’s new to me and I’m scared a lot but I’m just trying to take things slow and trying to not worry about the future too much
Awww balladeer 😻
+Psych2GoTv *Thanks for the list of symptoms for fear of intimacy:*
0:38 (1) Struggles with self-esteem
1:29 (2) Physical withdrawal
2:09 (3) Surface-level relations
2:45 (4) Agnossis of, and/or difficulty expressing, needs
3:20 (5) Hyper-critical self-mindset
I’m not afraid of intimacy. I’m just afraid of being intimate with the wrong person.
I am in love with all the references in your wonderful videos, loved the Edaine cameo ❤️
My main thing is fearing that they'll show their true abusive and toxic nature when I let my guard down. Playing the role of "sweet and loving guy on the outside, and absolutely abusive and manipulative guy on the inside".
Once, when I saw someone getting attached to me after my bold proposal of being together I got a panic attack from which I was recovering for almost a week. This and the points mentioned in the video got me thinking that I may actually be afraid of intimacy or even love
🎶 *"I'm not afraid that I was afraid when I told you that I was afraid of intimacy."* 🎶
- Therapy from Tick Tick Boom
I'm going to shower me with attention and my awareness. I'm going to give me a lot of my time. I'm going to be in physical proximity to me. I'm going to touch me, hold me, cuddle me. I'm going to try to connect with me physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually. I'm going to take good care of me. I'm going to care about my needs. I'm going to help me to meet my needs. I'm going to help me to survive. I'm going to shelter me from excessive suffering, fear and trauma. I'm going to have my back. I'm going to defend me and be loyal to me. I'm going to take on my agenda as my own. I'm going to make me an extension of you. I'm going to treat me as well as i would treat myself. I'm going to be happy for me when I succeed. I'm going to want for me what me most want for myself. I'm going to sacrifice for me and work on my behalf. I'm going to support me nurture me and encourage me. I'm going to cheerlead me. I'm going to encourage my self-exploration, self-expression and self-actualization. I'm going to respect my sovereignty as a consciousness. I'm not going to try to manipulate me, control me, dominate me or exploit me. I'm going to totally accept me and never judge me. I'm going to value me for my sake and appreciate me and see my intrinsic beauty. I'm not going to need anything from me and I'm not going to make me a tool to satisfy my own needs. I'm going to respect my point of view, wanting to understand my point of view, wanting to understand me, my uniqueness, taking the time to deeply get to know me. I'm not going to force your agenda or point of view on me. I'm going to listen to me and care about my interests and share similar interests with me. I'm going to develop togetherness with me and collaborate with me. I'm going to be there for me when i'm down and hopeless. I'm going to be there for me when I'm lonely. I'm going to validate my feelings, sharing my emotions with me, empathizing with me. My pain is going to be my pain. I'm going to meet me where I'm at, at my developmental level. I'm going to forgive me for my mistakes.
I'm going to be patient with me. I'm going to see the good in me even when I don't see the good in myself. I'm going to be generous and kind. I'm going to give myself verbal approval and praise. I'm going to compliment me on my uniqueness. I'm going to keep my promises to me. I'm going to keep my peace with me, avoid conflict with me. I'm going to tell the truth to me. I'm going to be able to fully trust me and I'm never going to cash in on that trust. I'm going to see my realness, warts and shadow and all as I truly are. I'm going to deeply appreciate the finite portion of consciousness that me are and I'm going to accept my selfishness whenever me have the urge to be selfish. Now ask myself on a scale of 0 to 10 how loved do me feel? Open Your Eyes. 😂🦘🦘🧨
It's not that I'm afraid of physical contact - I really just have problems to put my sexuality on front. I'm a man, but I'm very cautious, reserved and trying to keep it low.
So when I find someone attractive, it's more emotion than I can bear at a moment. I am afraid to encounter unsuspected moments, being under-prepared or trusting my partner in terms of sexual needs. Quite often, people judge my cautious behaviour on short notice, and I'm barely able to explain it because I'm just too confused by the sudden turn of events.
Yeah, I got all those symptoms. But childhood trauma and abuse should also be a factor. I'm also struggling with those. It is why I'm still single.
It would be nice to have a video with tips on how to get closer to people with these issues in a way that doesn't feel too scary or pressuring to them :)
I've had PTSD when I was a teen and was traumatized from both junior high and the internet. When I get close to others, hell even childhood friends from elementary, they break away and drift apart from me. On the internet, once I met people back then, it always seemed to go downhill. Once they find a fault within me or even find what I look like, they all ridicule me-like the months of friendship I had with them didn't matter. There was one case where I shared a picture with someone and they made it go viral on the website just to show how hideous I was. I literally hid in my closet after for the whole day.
There were a couple of times that I allowed to get myself close to some people as an adult...like three or four times. Two times I have fond memories of, and the two times or so they just didn't really care.
I already know I’m afraid of intimacy
Cool. It Took me many years to Figure Out. So U are able to Work at your concious mind now, congrats 🔥🌟
Hey... is that... thats the Wanderer.
And Alheithem and Yelan
Especially 1, *3* and to some level 5...
I don't know why, I really matured in terms of assertiveness, so now I can communicate pretty well AT FIRST, but when the relationship deepens... whoa, I suddenly don't know what to do to really deepen it MORE and make it more intimate, not in a romantic way, just to, you know, make REAL friends (finally...).
I'm not sure if it's about feeling too vulnerable (which in part it IS, for sure) of about me being lazy or afraid of COMMITMENT to others. When you want to be more intimate to someone but you don't see the same reciprocity, it's easy to assume they don't want you in their lives. Thus, why bother if that means rejection? Combined with a natural lack in interest to feel vulnerable once you experimented bullying and one of your parents being too stern and cold to you, and when you have experimented also rejection in almost every friendship (this. is. real, I'm not joking, and no, I'm not depressed or unhealthy, it's being a good while xD), it becomes kind of *creepy* that the thing never ends as you'd like... You might develop your social skills and feel proud about it, but then you reach an age in which is relatively hard to make an impact in other's life so that others are interested in you as a person. You now can be a great coworker or colleague in university, but then again it's difficult that, at that point, others want to make an(other) effort for you, as they already have their own circle of friends and family to care about.
Being introvert (that's not a bad thing, but it carries some preferences) and lazy (or not having enough energy for whatever reason, it may be a synthom of an illness) definitely don't help either... *S H I T*
Wonderful video! The Owl House reference was really nicely put too!
Most definitely have a fear with many social activities. I hate myself for being this way.
I don't really fear intimacy.
I just have no expectation and feel any relationships mean meeting certain requirements and failing to meet any means I'm better off just keeping my distance in all areas until proven or just abandon ship as soon it goes south.
In other words.
-Fear of failure + Perfectionism
-Feeling unworthy
True FRIENDSHIP should not be looked upon as someone “afraid to be intimate”. If someone is honestly satisfied with going no further than a certain point in their human relationships, that’s not automatically a bad thing. Everyone on earth does not necessarily need someone up in their mind 24/7. Let’s not knock the “Cool, Calm & Collected” set!
I tried to to be with someone like that. I awlays felt that we were constantly been pushing away from each other, but I was kinda passionate with her, so I tried to help with her problems (such as low self esteem, anxiety, depression) and make a comfortable enviroment, but I couldnt make a good diference, probably because I had a low self esteem too. At least we both had grown a little together, ee learnt some things, and now she is moving for another school, hope everything goes better for her there.
(Sorry if I messed up something, im brazillian and still learning english)
When I was going up, there was no showing your feelings, told to keep everything to yourself, no one hugged, or showed love in any way.
your channel has one of the best knowledge of mental health! I am so glad I am following a channel like you
Her voice is very soft
bruh they really put genshins wanderer in there huh?
edit: grammar stuff
I was just shut down by someone who I tried open up to about being terrified of intimacy. She made me feel so alien and strange for being afraid of getting close. Watching this video and reading all of the comments has made me feel much better about myself. I literally fit all five signs The last time somebody tried to hug me I was so uncomfortable I was physically twitching. Thank you all for sharing your stories, I feel not alone. 🙂
It's been like this for almost the 20 years of my life and, honestly, I'm so sick and tired of it. It's a lonely and miserable situation, I WANT to make friends or have a "special someone", if that's possible, but I can't seem to form a genuine, deep relationship or to stop pushing people away because of this paralyzing fear of rejection and betrayal. At this point, this makes me question a lot if it's even worthy being alive anymore (since I'm also not great at anything else, not even at overcoming this fear and it would be better without me being a inconvenience).
Please do not think like that. I am sure you are a wonderful person and you are great at many things.
You might not see it right now but you are absolutely worthy of love and friendship and all happy things in life.
Please do not give up and search for help - might it be a family member or professional therapist.
I myself was at this point two years ago and it was scary back then. Right now I am much better (still no romantic relationship in sight but some colleagues and I are friendly and sometimes go out for coffee).
It takes time and a lot of effort but it is worth it in the end.
So please - do not give up hope! ❤
I'm not sure if that's the reason I don't wanna be in a relationship, cause it sounds like me, but at the same time.. my thought process is different. I know that I tend to be like that - one day I'm very open and passionate, then I ignore this person for like 2 weeks. I know that if I'm gonna date with this person then I'm gonna be the toxic one to them, so I'm not even going to try. I don't want to hurt them by always making them wait for me and making them babysit my mental health cause this is something that I should deal with by myself. That said person also have the hero complex and he's always putting problems of others above his, I don't want to put myself as his responsibility. That's why even tho I like him a lot, I'm not gonna try anything
4 out of the 5 hit hard. I have a therapist does that count as someone like a mental provider cause I think this is something I want to bring up in one of my sessions
The only kind of intimacy I have discomfort with is the sexual kind. I can be vulnerable talking about my issues or things with some people no problem, and I know I deserve to be loved, but I don't necessarily need it.. the love I already have from friends my dog and some family is plenty.
1min ago and already so many views!
When I saw scara/wanderer I thought I was imagining things 😂😭
I've noticed that I have a problem with communication during the beginning stages of my relationships. I'm not one to text first usually and if it's a new relationship especially, I just get kinda spacey and don't focus on texting that person. So, it probably looks like I'm pushing them away or keeping them at a comfortable distance. I do find myself relating to some of the points made here, but the only one I didn't was the one about physical contact. Like, I hug as a greeting, just full-on. I'm not too shy to hold hands, although it might be false confidence getting me to do this. Idk 🤷♀️
guess i needed this, thanks youtube
I love these little shorts I have learned a lot about myself that I have a lot of issues with myself I've been in a horrible 7-year relationship and it was very abusive I realized after this relationship has been over for 2 years and he is in prison I have this fear of being loved I don't know how to accept it I want to give it but I have to give myself love first I don't know how to share it and I don't know how to receive it I have a lot of problems I have a lot of anger issues too and I really see a lot of myself and a lot of your videos but I love watching them and I thank you for putting them here much love and happy New years
0:51 is that scaramouche from genshin ?
seeing him in a psych2go video is the funniest thing
WaNdERER! I can't believe genshin was in this video, thats amazing
Damn I wish I could use this
🌏Oh Shit thx....Indeed. Hits my Core. Shinji, Asuka, Misato, Ayanami...Who knows Headgehog Dilemma Neon Genesis?🌐🥴 Thx so much psyc2go for this topic 💝
Thanks to a combination of abuse and childhood trauma, I was never able to build the sort of skills necessary to both pick and sustain positive and healthy intimate relationships and following the end of what was ultimately a very toxic marriage over a decade ago, I tried to give it one more shot with someone I'd genuinely grown to love very much.
That ended so disastrously that after that, I gave up entirely on the notion of relationships entirely, to say nothing of intimacy.
While I'm in therapy now working through all that, it's hard not to avoid the common stigma that my fear of intimacy, which is built on a lifetime of trauma, guilt and shame, leads to people wanting to just brand me an 'InCel' instead.
I'd appreciate it if you guys did a video/short explaining the very real differences between the two, and keep doing what you're doing!
This video is about me. I recently realized - being a 32 years old man - that I always had SPD - Schizoid Personality Disorder.
I was not able to meaningfully connect with other people as if I didn't have "software" for such action. I couldn't even imagine it. All my relationships were shallow. I always had this passive, reactive, shallow and anxious attachment - because I lacked an integrated active side of my own self. If I were to explain it in simpler terms, I feared intimacy (while not being fully aware of it), because on my side there was nothing for the other person to connect to in a way that was safe or meaningful for me, as I lacked my own expectations for an intimate bond (fear of engulfment, appropriation). All of this was largely UNCONSCIOUS - I did not even know I had any kind of problem. I just lived completely alone and detached from other people and was content with that... I felt like other people had nothing meaningful for me to add to my life, as well as I felt like I have nothing to give myself. It did not seem like a problem to me, like other people with personality disorders (NPD, BPD), I was not self-aware and neither was able nor willing to self-reflect. Even my self-reflections were shallow and fragmentary. I did not feel lonely, for the most part.
Until a little more than a year ago, I started feeling emotions I have never had. For the first time in my life I was feeling like interacting with other people was pleasant to me. Something that I imagine even children in the kindergarten are able to feel (I was always playing alone and was very quiet, even in the kindergarten). It was extremely shocking to me. 2022 was an intense year for me. I had a depression and had to experience the death of my false schizoid ego, as well as the emergence of my real ego. To compound this, I had an extremely painful and disappointing relationship with a girl, who turned out to be extremely narcissistic.
This was a difficult year. I learned so much. I am still lonely, but I hope I will have more luck in the future.
MaYbe "Attachment theory" from Heidi Priebe at RUclips might Help U a Bit. She helped me Lots 🌏💝
Good luck to you! You seem to be at the level of mindfulness where you can describe your issue with so much detail, and you deserve better chances to find good people to connect to. It was extremely interesting to read your comment.
Wow, you seem so wise, yet so hurt…
Keep grinding dude! You really seem like a smart, kind person!
How did you know that the false ego is dead now? I'll appreciate your answer.
@@A.M....... I think with thinking our own Feelings and Thoughts are the "right" ones, without asking and considering the world outside our own mind...ask people directly about their Feelings and thoughts might Help to Connect in deeper honest Level. But First we need to learn talking communicating about our own Vulnurability in Order to See and embrace, understand that the outside world, every human IS vulnurable AS Well. Ego might be harsh and critical towards self and Others, the authentic Soul can embrace Everything there IS, without judgement or pushaway. So the Soul IS soft and strong at Same time. For me IT was helpful Accepting and embracing myself First, with whatever there was, in Order to be more opened Up to the outside world. First I was Like a constantly fighting Eva 02 batteling the self and Others, fighting to be Loved and Liked, but I was Not able to Accept and Like myself First, It was Long process...and Lots Had to do with old Traumatic unseen childhood Traumata, Which I did Not know at the beginning, but cognitive behavior Therapy cbt, Lots If Training, helped Lots. And It still can Happen, that some old trauma might appears anywhere, but now you learned to calm yourself, learned to communicate and Go trough hard Times together. Fearful, Avoidant, FearfulAvoidant and Secure Attachments. A therapist sayed, that about 50 percent have No Secure Attachment learned during childhood and therefore having troubles with deeper Connection later in Life...maybe this knowledge might Help you, for me this knowledge Had massive Impact. Same with the thought of "Fear of society". I did Not fear society, but learned that I was an Introverted Extrovert, who Not much learned what It feels Like being emotionally touched by Others, allowing myself to be vulnurable and soft. I See there Many Walls falling and many latebloomers currently. Best wishes at your journeys 🌏❣️😊
So my failed attempt at a relationship was 14 years ago, think its time to move on....?
OMG YES THE OWL HOUSE REFERENCE
There are times where I feared intimacy. When there’s someone I like, I would want to hug them, but I held back because I was scared. I feel the same thing if it’s the other way around.
Kinda hard to be afraid of something that you can never have.
Thank you for the great content each and every upload. I personally discover a lot about myself through your channel. More subscribers to come 💖🥰
I think Psych2go video made 2 years ago "7 Signs You Have fear of Intimacy" it's a good complementary for your new animation.👍
I usually avoid physical contact with anyone if i can help it, cause i dont know how they will react...
I keep people at a distance because I know I will emotionally abuse them if I don't
I love being touched! I adore that feeling personally. Sadly, no one ever seems to want to get close enough to me emotionally for that. I don't even look for relationships or anything. I have taught myself to ignore any signs that someone might like me. I figure they just intend to mess with me so I don't bother looking into it. It's all I know so I figure I will die alone. That's life.
What if it's because I struggle to even understand my own thoughts and be able to collect them
Sounds as If your realm IS more thinking one. Greets from an overthinker. Can be hell in own mind If its running in cycles. My Saviors are NeTe and my demon was Fi. Which mbti are U?
i really see myself in this. follow for a long time already but didn't watch the videos. I felt to anxious to get my own issues pointed out or might find even more.
I love how you not only do these videos to help others but also incorporate characters from other shows and games to further strengthen your messages. Thanks for that :) I see that Wanderer
Since people take me to be messy...
so I avoid intimacy 🤔
I always feel ashamed and embarrassed. If I am being honest I never knew it was a problem with intimacy. I always felt something was wrong and pulled away. I never felt like I was making my girlfriend happy and even now I still push them away until they hate me.
And I just truly never understood why. If it was just depression or maybe something else that I didn't understand.
I know how to smile and hold hands, but...whenever I go to sleep at night my chest, heart, soul (you pick) hurts.
It hurts, but put yourself in their shoes. They don't know or understand what is going on, especially whenever you are always smiling.
Oof, alrighty 4 out of 5 is concerning
Alrighty welp, gotta work on it huh😅 we've got this y'all!✨️
Me: Wants a close relationship
Also me: Somehow has all of these signs....
Goddamnit Psych2Go keeps helping me realize things about myself I thought were normal
ALSO THE WANDERER IS IN THE VIDEO?!?!
Clever inclusion of Eda and Raine! I gasped. Wild how if I had watched this video two weeks ago I wouldn’t have gotten the reference. On that note, though - a fear of intimacy has definitely been a huge factor in the dissolution of my relationships with friends, family, and partners over the past few decades. Whoops.
I'm going to shower you with attention and my awareness. I'm going to give you a lot of my time. I'm going to be in physical proximity to you. I'm going to touch you, hold you, cuddle you. I'm going to try to connect with you physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually. I'm going to take good care of you. I'm going to care about your needs. I'm going to help you to meet your needs. I'm going to help you to survive. I'm going to shelter you from excessive suffering, fear and trauma. I'm going to have your back. I'm going to defend you and be loyal to you. I'm going to take on your agenda as my own. I'm going to make you an extension of me. I'm going to treat you as well as i would treat myself. I'm going to be happy for you when you succeed. I'm going to want for you what you most want for yourself. I'm going to sacrifice for you and work on your behalf. I'm going to support you nurture you and encourage you. I'm going to cheerlead you. I'm going to encourage your self-exploration, self-expression and self-actualization. I'm going to respect your sovereignty as a consciousness. I'm not going to try to manipulate you, control you, dominate you or exploit you. I'm going to totally accept you and never judge you. I'm going to value you for your sake and appreciate you and see your intrinsic beauty. I'm not going to need anything from you and I'm not going to make you a tool to satisfy my own needs. I'm going to respect your point of view, wanting to understand your point of view, wanting to understand you, your uniqueness, taking the time to deeply get to know you. I'm not going to force my agenda or point of view on you. I'm going to listen to you and care about your interests and share similar interests with you. I'm going to develop togetherness with you and collaborate with you. I'm going to be there for you when you're down and hopeless. I'm going to be there for you when you're lonely. I'm going to validate your feelings, sharing your emotions with you, empathizing with you. Your pain is going to be my pain. I'm going to meet you where you're at, at your developmental level. I'm going to forgive you for your mistakes.
I'm going to be patient with you. I'm going to see the good in you even when you don't see the good in yourself. I'm going to be generous and kind. I'm going to give you verbal approval and praise. I'm going to compliment you on your uniqueness. I'm going to keep my promises to you. I'm going to keep my peace with you, avoid conflict with you. I'm going to tell the truth to you. You're going to be able to fully trust me and I'm never going to cash in on that trust. I'm going to see your realness, warts and shadow and all as you truly are. I'm going to deeply appreciate the finite portion of consciousness that you are and I'm going to accept your selfishness whenever you have the urge to be selfish. Now ask yourself on a scale of 0 to 10 how loved do you feel? Open Your Eyes. 😂🦘🦘🧨
Sorry but even tho the content is really good while i listen to it ....I COULDN'T TAKE IT THAT SERIOUS WHEN I SAW THE GENSHIN IMPACT CHARACTERS XD SORRY ASDFGHJKL
1:29 I really do want to have physical contact with someone at school, since i mostly see her at school and don't really get too have meet-ups whenever im going out with friends. Its just that it might be a bit awkward approaching her physically with the friends around and because of public display of affection. Or somthin like that, idk. Great video btw, i gotta say.
Is nobody gonna talk about Scaramouche randomly appearing in this video??? ;-;