This is why he was so "generous" His munificance made it easy for him to avoid intimacy. I loved him and wanted to be near him again like when we were young. When I think back to those days, I am sad to realize what it was really.
I was married to a narcissistic man..everything describe about them is true, I really thought I was the crazy one, I now know how to deal with him and quite frankly ..he can not handle me ...why? Because with the same force he pushes. I push back harder...so he either fights or fly's... It doesn't make a difference to me..why? Because I learned to not give two craps...I have learned to heal...I'm happy.. God has been helping me...mainly stand up to him...I am not alone what can man do when God Almighty is on my side...thank u Sam for all your videos...
Hi Sam, I've commented a long time ago about being pretty damaged being raised by a true Narcissist my Dad, then my husband and then my Son! I finally got ALONE for the last ten years trying to figure out who I am and what happened. I try not to dwell on it and just begin to enjoy getting to know me, peace is what all these folks need.. some inner peace no one can steal from them. What a world, Thank You Sam I just prayed for you, Blessings Rebecca
I actually can't believe how accurate this video is! My Aunt is a Narcisst and she has used this exact same tactic on alot of our family members. I was a victim of it once too until i broke free. Sam your videos are amazing. Keep them coming :)
I had to work because he punished me by not giving any money anymore. But i was not allowed to work. only because i refused to be his (sex)slave anymore after his online date crap. Glad i m gone Richer in all ways than i was with the rich poor boy.
Whew!!!!! I FELT this!!!!! So true..I've been there 💔 #Hugs...I hope you're doing much better now!!!! I'm currently in the healing process after 15 years of complete hell ❗❗❗
I'm in the same shape, sister. Only my mom is the ignoring type, at least. I'm engulfed to the point that my children think I'm an adopted sister nobody wanted. I've lost my independence, health, soul, happiness, empathy, everything. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
I truly hope you are free by now.. and if you are pls tell me: How did you leave? I am still a slave... I hate this house. My narcissistic mother controls the money. I have agoraphobia depression and cptsd and i am trying so hard to find a job but every time she sabotages me. How did you leave???
Sociopaths, indeed. This describes my parents to a "T." Father died from prostate cancer, after a lifetime of being a Satanist, violent, murderer, rapist and pedophile. Mother is still around, manipulating with money, as her six children struggle with the aftermath of unimagined abuse & sadistic torture. We are prone to autoimmune diseases, addiction, and mental illness. Until I became disabled, I'd had successful careers as a scientist, business consultant, spiritual minister, and psychotherapist. I was lucky. But now, I've had to ask Mother for help, because the sociopath corporation work disability I'd paid into forever, decided they didn't want to pay out anymore, after two years, and now that I'm terminal, too weak to appeal or get help. God bless everyone!
Remember the Trojan Horse? A classic narcissistic gift. Think of poor Helen excaping her Narc husband 3000 years ago and him bringing an army to recapture her.. Think of a baited trap or baited fish hook with a nasty sharp barb inside, more classic narcissistic gifts.
My stepson is currently enslaved to his mother through money. She's now setting the full trap to take the funds he's due to get when he turns 18. It's hard to not be able to get them to see the truth of the abuse...
Watch out for a one time or a perpetual contract. eg: if narc pays you for a favor is it because for this one favor, or does he pay you as his personel, meaning you are now obliged to help him anytime in the future too. Look how you feel. Narcissists use perpetual traps.
He definitely does! So sad.. my ex narc family did this to him and I talked to him over and over and he wouldn't see it. Until he started acting this way towards me too...
my new ex-wife's grandmother wanted to take complete control of my finances both before and after we got married. Before we got married, she insisted (and I refused) that I hand over all the checks written by my family to start our marital nest egg, to her, so she could deposit them in her bank account and write me a check for the whole amount. She insisted that my wife's mother (her daughter) was after my money and this was the only way to protect me. After we got married, my wife's grandmother insisted and asked me every morning she was staying with us to take her down to the bank so I could add her name to all my bank accounts for the same reason (I refused of course) After my now ex-wife and I split up over my refusal to allow her grandmother to live with us permanently, the grandmother wrote me several letters demanding money for her, even sued me for the cost of the wedding (My lawyer rebutted saying it was given gratis and could not now be demanded), the grandmother told various family members who warned me that she planned on cleaning me out completely. Her sister called me and told me it was imperative I file for contested divorce where I lived, otherwise she would file and make me go there from Hawaii (where I was stationed at the time) and could say anything she wanted. I filed first, and my ex-wife was thus obligated to return to Hawaii if she chose to contest in person. When my divorce hearing finally came, the judge asked my lawyer what the outstanding issues were, and he told the judge "Your honor, the defendant (My soon to be ex-wife) was demanding lifetime financial support. The judge said "She isn't going to get it....I am not giving that to her...she walks out on this man 42 days after their wedding and expects to get money for the rest of her life???" Later on I wanted to cancel a whole life insurance policy that I had taken out in my ex-wife's name, and I was told that because it was in her name, she had to be the one to cancel it, so they had to write to her, saying she could receive the present cash value, or take over the monthly payments. My agent got her answer back a week later...she wanted to continue the policy but wanted ME to keep paying for it......since that was not an option, my agent cancelled the policy and she got the cash value of $250, which was what it was worth at the time. so basically it was her grandmother who was the one who was after my money.......I am told that if I had allowed her to put her name on all my bank accounts, she would most certainly have withdrawn every single penny and there would not have been anything legally I could have done since her name would have been on the accounts. live and learb
Mikki James ageed. The thing to do is once the realization of how fucked up the Narc is, one must question "What in the hell is wrong with Me to accept this crap for My worth?"
This is why he was so "generous" His munificance made it easy for him to avoid intimacy. I loved him and wanted to be near him again like when we were young. When I think back to those days, I am sad to realize what it was really.
C.A Cary: Same exact comment here, letter by letter. I was used and discarded. I really loved him.
I was married to a narcissistic man..everything describe about them is true, I really thought I was the crazy one, I now know how to deal with him and quite frankly ..he can not handle me ...why? Because with the same force he pushes. I push back harder...so he either fights or fly's... It doesn't make a difference to me..why? Because I learned to not give two craps...I have learned to heal...I'm happy.. God has been helping me...mainly stand up to him...I am not alone what can man do when God Almighty is on my side...thank u Sam for all your videos...
Hi Sam, I've commented a long time ago about being pretty damaged being raised by a true Narcissist my Dad, then my husband and then my Son! I finally got ALONE for the last ten years trying to figure out who I am and what happened. I try not to dwell on it and just begin to enjoy getting to know me, peace is what all these folks need.. some inner peace no one can steal from them. What a world, Thank You Sam I just prayed for you, Blessings Rebecca
I actually can't believe how accurate this video is! My Aunt is a Narcisst and she has used this exact same tactic on alot of our family members. I was a victim of it once too until i broke free.
Sam your videos are amazing. Keep them coming :)
I had to work because he punished me by not giving any money anymore. But i was not allowed to work.
only because i refused to be his (sex)slave anymore after his online date crap.
Glad i m gone
Richer in all ways than i was with the rich poor boy.
Whew!!!!! I FELT this!!!!! So true..I've been there 💔 #Hugs...I hope you're doing much better now!!!! I'm currently in the healing process after 15 years of complete hell ❗❗❗
This is what my mother does i cant run from this I AM A SLAVE
I'm in the same shape, sister. Only my mom is the ignoring type, at least. I'm engulfed to the point that my children think I'm an adopted sister nobody wanted. I've lost my independence, health, soul, happiness, empathy, everything. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
I truly hope you are free by now.. and if you are pls tell me: How did you leave? I am still a slave... I hate this house. My narcissistic mother controls the money. I have agoraphobia depression and cptsd and i am trying so hard to find a job but every time she sabotages me. How did you leave???
Sociopaths, indeed. This describes my parents to a "T."
Father died from prostate cancer, after a lifetime of being a Satanist, violent, murderer, rapist and pedophile.
Mother is still around, manipulating with money, as her six children struggle with the aftermath of unimagined abuse & sadistic torture. We are prone to autoimmune diseases, addiction, and mental illness.
Until I became disabled, I'd had successful careers as a scientist, business consultant, spiritual minister, and psychotherapist. I was lucky.
But now, I've had to ask Mother for help, because the sociopath corporation work disability I'd paid into forever, decided they didn't want to pay out anymore, after two years, and now that I'm terminal, too weak to appeal or get help.
God bless everyone!
+Elaine Marie Just like the psychopath 'father' and narcissist 'mother' I was stuck with. May God bless you with eternal life. Forever love to you.
Remember the Trojan Horse? A classic narcissistic gift. Think of poor Helen excaping her Narc husband 3000 years ago and him bringing an army to recapture her..
Think of a baited trap or baited fish hook with a nasty sharp barb inside, more classic narcissistic gifts.
My stepson is currently enslaved to his mother through money. She's now setting the full trap to take the funds he's due to get when he turns 18. It's hard to not be able to get them to see the truth of the abuse...
@Parsa LL she ended up taking most of the funds.
Perfectly and eloquently stated! Thank you Prof. Vaknin for shedding light. I only wish I had discovered your work sooner..
Watch out for a one time or a perpetual contract. eg: if narc pays you for a favor is it because for this one favor, or does he pay you as his personel, meaning you are now obliged to help him anytime in the future too. Look how you feel. Narcissists use perpetual traps.
He definitely does! So sad.. my ex narc family did this to him and I talked to him over and over and he wouldn't see it. Until he started acting this way towards me too...
Thank you for your work!
my new ex-wife's grandmother wanted to take complete control of my finances both before and after we got married. Before we got married, she insisted (and I refused) that I hand over all the checks written by my family to start our marital nest egg, to her, so she could deposit them in her bank account and write me a check for the whole amount. She insisted that my wife's mother (her daughter) was after my money and this was the only way to protect me. After we got married, my wife's grandmother insisted and asked me every morning she was staying with us to take her down to the bank so I could add her name to all my bank accounts for the same reason (I refused of course) After my now ex-wife and I split up over my refusal to allow her grandmother to live with us permanently, the grandmother wrote me several letters demanding money for her, even sued me for the cost of the wedding (My lawyer rebutted saying it was given gratis and could not now be demanded), the grandmother told various family members who warned me that she planned on cleaning me out completely. Her sister called me and told me it was imperative I file for contested divorce where I lived, otherwise she would file and make me go there from Hawaii (where I was stationed at the time) and could say anything she wanted. I filed first, and my ex-wife was thus obligated to return to Hawaii if she chose to contest in person. When my divorce hearing finally came, the judge asked my lawyer what the outstanding issues were, and he told the judge "Your honor, the defendant (My soon to be ex-wife) was demanding lifetime financial support. The judge said "She isn't going to get it....I am not giving that to her...she walks out on this man 42 days after their wedding and expects to get money for the rest of her life???" Later on I wanted to cancel a whole life insurance policy that I had taken out in my ex-wife's name, and I was told that because it was in her name, she had to be the one to cancel it, so they had to write to her, saying she could receive the present cash value, or take over the monthly payments. My agent got her answer back a week later...she wanted to continue the policy but wanted ME to keep paying for it......since that was not an option, my agent cancelled the policy and she got the cash value of $250, which was what it was worth at the time. so basically it was her grandmother who was the one who was after my money.......I am told that if I had allowed her to put her name on all my bank accounts, she would most certainly have withdrawn every single penny and there would not have been anything legally I could have done since her name would have been on the accounts. live and learb
Exactly 💯💯💯💯💯
This is my dad. I need help. Please contact me
$50 from one today
Getting 10$
No one is a victim. We all cause our realities.
Mikki James ageed. The thing to do is once the realization of how fucked up the Narc is, one must question "What in the hell is wrong with Me to accept this crap for My worth?"
Unless you are a minor who doesn't know any better, and has no support circle.