They give you common-sense answers rather than empathy: “Relax. Cheer up. Just be quiet for a few minutes. Go sit down if you’re upset. Get off your feet. Drink a glass of water. Go watch TV. Make yourself a cup of tea to calm down.” Passive-aggressive doesn’t open up the communication, it shuts down the conversation. Excellent vid, Stephanie.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
I just stopped dating a guy who began saying these phases when he wasn't getting what he wanted, especially when I caught him in a few lies. He was a people pleaser and got passive agressive when he needs were not being met YET he would not be honest when I asked them what his needs were so I could. So I walked! Thanks for this!
Thank you for all your information, I watch your videos and it helps me see what I wasn't sure what to call it before... abuse. My wife started out in the first month separating me from family and friends by saying we need to spend more time together and get to know each other, even gave me a key to move in saying I would be better to live with her to get closer. She talked me out of monthly poker nights and golf and now 15 years later says it was a concern that I didn't put her first She now realizes we should have had our own time and expected my friends and family to be right there like I didn't walk away from them. I was STUPID! Last week on my birthday, (we're in limbo, she kicked me out), she took me out for our 11y/o to celebrate with me and was mad I wasn't giving her enough attention and expressing enough appreciation she did this for me. I've learned more from you than the 7 counselors she has pushed me to because I have sooo many problems to fix so we can be better. Thanks again
You might also want to check out the channels Mended Light and Therapy in a Nutshell and even Put the Shovel Down. For their videos on healthy dating, relationship, communication, conflict resolution skills, healthy boundaries and how to maintain them, etc. You might even want to scan through the titles of the videos from these channels and others I've made into a public playlist on my channel - it's titled "A1 - LIFESTUFF HOMEWORK" or something like that (this playlist is for me and my nieces and nephews and I don't make videos). I've found these channels including Stephanie's to have the best, most useful, effective and instantly applicable information on these topics.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
What was astonishing to me was how easily they lied. And then tried to tell me I was crazy. It’s really insane. That break of trust can pollute future relationships. Questioning myself against my intuition was so confusing. Learning to trust my gut was huge. If there’s even a question, there might be a problem. I now have to be careful to sense reality vs past trauma. Thank you- this is amazing info and so true.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Story of my freakin life. ALL OF THESE WERE SAID TO ME..Not only did I get the passive aggressiveness, I was told that what I was seeing wasn't happening. Then told that, "I'm ruining everything " for letting her know she's being passive and or rude.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
I have some passive aggressive traits. I am very aware I make digs at certain things. I have realised though that I’m like that when o give to much, and expect others to give as much as I do. Then I dig at others. I’m working on this and also giving myself time to stop thinking I have to pick up after everyone.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Thank you for these videos. Not only do they help me learn from my past relationships, but I use them to self-reflect if I possess any negative / toxic traits.
It is very helpful and insightful to learn these things because I know I’ve picked up some passive aggressive habits from different people in my life, mainly family. I know that I want to get rid of these habits or at least learn to manage them Because I want to have healthy relationships even though that that’s new to me
One common passive aggressive phrase is "I'm sorry you feel that way" as a way to invalidate the actual reality of the problem you are bringing to them for a responsible answer.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
This is my ex 100% I was always questioning if he was abusive or not. I got the silent treatment, the passive aggressive comments, I oftenly felt like a fly smashing into a glass wall over and over again. I'm anxious, so it really triggered me - I reacted with tears, blame, called him toxic, imature, which made him distancing even further. We got to a point where neither of us knew how to deal with it. Understanding this really opened my eyes - I will do the work on myself so I can be healthy
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
This is 100% my sister unfortunately - that I have been more like a mother to over her earlier years (I'm 10 yrs older). She's exhausting & has sucked the life out of me more times than I can count. I'd gotten so accustomed to her behaving this way with me & her snarky side- handed digs & I still always tried to take the high road & not take it personal, while realizing she's insecure & needs tons of attention...I actually thought I could help her. I'd let it build & then I'd eventually get so sick of it & she'd cross the line again - that is try to discuss it with her, but she'd gas light me & scoff at my feelings & cut me out of her life. It was this vicious cycle that was exhausting. Then I recently lost my adult son who I was super close to & she even did hurtful petty things when she came for his celebration of life. That was the final straw for me... I'm done taking care of her & letting her cause any more negativity in my life & it's so nice to hear you describing exactly what I have experienced with her - I finally feel validated. I spoke calmly with her & backed away...I didn't give her the opportunity to hurt me anymore - even though she tried in everyway. I realized it was that little girl that I was holding on to... not the mean vicious adult middle aged woman she is today...I truly no longer feel connected to her & my life is more peaceful! I did it very calmly & said I no longer have the energy or desire to participate in this little 2 step with you... I'm sorry, but I'm done. Thank you for your help... these histrionic narcissistic people are so destructive & yet charming to others... so they get away with it for a long time... it helps to hear you break it down.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Highlighting the abuse seems to just aggravate the situation I’ve found. The other person gets mad when I highlight they’re gaslighting me or being manipulative towards me. I’m trying to set boundaries and get comfortable with saying how I feel but it always just ends with the other person getting mad. I then don’t know how to respond in a healthy way so I just stay quiet as I feel out of my depth. I’m fairly new to all of this and try to practice talking to people as much as I can but I feel completely lost mid-conversation sometimes x
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
They get mad because they want full access to you and don't like you telling them they are causing you discomfort as it distorts their view of themselves. Do you find that the person your dealing with, deflects and turns it arpund on you when you try to highlight their bad behaviour? If so, just walk away! You cannot fix them and its not your job to either. If they cannot handle you speaking you mind respectfully to them, its their maturity they need to work on.
Yes I can relate to this. I would love examples of different situations and how to respond. I just end up deciding I won’t get with that person again and will set firm boundaries for myself not to get with them. If it’s someone that I have to see on a regular basis, keeping the conversation very short and moving on.
I do this when I make a mistake, and the person is angry with me. I basically let the relationship go 🚶♀️ I have been that way from a child when I didn't behave perfectly, I would lose the relationship so I learned to leave first to avoid rejection.
The guy I’m with is Weird he is nice then later he snaps. Since I’m nice sometimes I believe him but he lies or doesn’t realize he hurts me? He seems like he just doesn’t know how to love:( He seems like he cares but then doesn’t? Since he smokes weed I think it’s that effecting him as well in a way beside him having a bad childhood history. His mom wasn’t nurturing and wasn’t there for him and especially his Dad. He said his Dad was messed up to him. But then any how I wish he can open his eyes that he needs help. We have kids together so it’s time he man’s up by seeking help to get better. Though like I said he has to be willing to seek help other than that things get over I am just so tired. It’s been 8 years since I have been hoping he wakes up. I don’t have any other support to get from family so I feel I don’t have a choice but the deal with things and be strong to push myself to not let it affect me. Though It does sometimes. God helps me. I wish I could just have healthy relationship with him or I don’t know if I’ll have to move on somehow:(. God bless everyone and this beautiful coach.
What can make it worse and happens a lot is if a 3rd person comes along and sides with the abusive person for no reason whatsoever. After they get aggressive to get you to react they switch down and start acting the victim. The 3rd person didn’t get to see the aggressive part as abusers normally abuse people alone but your reaction to it hence them siding with pa person.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Would love some examples of what to say to people who are passive aggressive. So if someone says “I didn’t know you were in a rush” what do you say to that if you know 100% they’re being passive aggressive?
My wife initiates arguments about trivial things (not programming a garage opener)(I’m lazy during a day off from work)and unfairly accuses me of untrue behavior and when I try to defend myself the argument escalates to the point of my losing my temper. Then she gives me the silent treatment lasting up to 2-3 weeks and I feel like a jerk for not controlling my emotions. The only thing that brings about conversation is an event that serves her benefit. I am on TRT and feel vulnerable to negative stimulus. I’m at my nerves last strand.
This is fascinating and incredibly helpful! It makes me think of a lot of people in my family, particularly my mother. It’s been challenging over the past few years to realize that she is as you said a child, in the most basic sense. Terrible communication skills and not wanting to address the real issues. I’m trying to figure out if she’s passive aggressive Or narcissistic or both. It’s definitely one of those three options and I just wanna know how to handle the relationship and a healthy way. I haven’t really seen it handled properly. It would be nice to have a healthy relationship there, but if that’s not possible then obviously I would have to cut her out of my life, which I don’t want to do completely.
I’m guilty of using the “im not mad anymore” phrase because my SO gives me the silent treatment and whenever I approach him about whatever we were upset about, He doesn’t respond well to being confronted. He would rather walk away from a disagreement while I want to sort it out. Its hard to leave an issue unresolved. So I back off but I’m obviously still upset. I’ve learned my lesson with him to just drop it. Then he will come around and be like “what’s wrong?” What am I supposed to say to that? I have already tried the “here’s what i am upset about, let’s resolve this” route and he feels like I’m overbearing or something just because I want to resolve it then and there. So my only other option is to try to drop it but I’m clearly going to look and be upset, because I am. Sometimes I feel like I’m crazy. Am I the toxic one here? Do we both have toxic traits?
This is different from what Jo has replied, but some of us really do need time. I find it nearly impossible to resolve something I’m upset about then and there and this is just the way I process things. It doesn’t mean I’m over it or that I’m not wanting to talk. I legit can’t yet. I’m not shut down or trying to gain emotional leverage. I need to collect myself and breathe, but I do remain open and connected and present. Your spouse may be like me. You would know way better than I if your spouse is truly shutting down or neglecting communication altogether.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
I has 40 plus years of this shite. I won't, can't make an excuse for abuse of any sort. Meaning their poor sad childhood. I wish one of these videos would stop saying. " because of their childhood abuse". Stop. They are now adults. No more excuses. Having said that I got a lot out of your talk . Thank you.
Sometimes you’ve got to disappear. If the patterns are already established between you and sister, any pushback will likely be met with extreme resistance from her. It’s likely that she is already waiting for the pushback if it’s been bad enough. Best wishes.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
I feel so defeated after watching this... The things you say are things my narc mom says. Willing to listen (only to guilt, gas light and manipulate me) and I say I need space but need more and more space beacuse she keeps adding more and more things I need to discuss she fabricates that I have to defend. So exhausting. So I look like a huge passive aggressive jerk because she keep gas lighting me over and over again adding to the list of abuse I have to defend. This video was super triggery. I do these "healthy" things like ask for space, yet these things are used against me by the narc. My narc om says "I am willing to talk when you are ready" which is NOT TRUE. She is willing to talk to GAS LIGHT, guilt me and manipulate me back into an abusive dysfunctional relationship that I want NOTHING to do with. This is hopeless. I am at a total loss.
How to know what I am do you have any website that takes a test about it. I feel like my husband is aggressive towards me but then when I get frustrated with his bad mood I reply I’m not 😡 which you are telling me I’m passive Aggressive?
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
On a more semantic level I would label a response that leaves you hanging with yet another question a passive offensive one. And a response that leaves you hanging with a true answer would be a passive defensive one. I dont see something wrong with the latter and I find the label of passive aggression alone a little disordering.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Can passive aggressive people change? I’m working on my marriage where my husband was emotionally abusive. He’s going to therapy and I can see he’s trying but I am scared he will go back to this and this is just “who he is” any thoughts?
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Is there a way to help this person be less passive aggressive? I know some one with a good heart and otherwise healthy but uses this when they’re mad. I feel like they would change if given the tools. Definitely not a narcissist.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???...
But what if you want to say why you are upset but dont because the person will come back at you with what you do and gaslight you. That's why I dont even bother to explain how I feel. It just causes another argument and I dont want to go there.
the only youtuber i cant listen to faster than 1.5X cuz she talks fast already lol love your vids i watch you daily you have an amazing beautiful life changing knowledge and i study so much-grateful!
it's sad cuz i have some of this passive agressivness within me.grew up in a shitty ass family and never learned how to communicate.but trying my best the last few years and so immense progress
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Yes. This is gaslighting because it’s calling into question your aptitude/ability and the very different reality you may know about yourself and skills. There is an undertow of negativity and superiority in their statement. Not only do you not know how to do something (in their view), the abuser is also placing themselves on a pedestal by indicating they have better basic knowledge, basic skills etc. None of this may be true but they try to tell you this is the reality. A hallmark of gaslighting is making you doubt yourself and planting an ongoing false narrative of doubts into your psyche where previously there was peace and happiness. If you want to screw with them, just shrug your shoulders and tell them you’d rather learn how to do it ‘correctly’ from XYZ anyway. Then walk away. Watch them chase you and have a rage fit before your very eyes. Doing so is an escalation on your part but it will reveal their true and ugly nature.
@@TheQueensWish Thank you for this explanation, it helped me understand more. Although in terms of learning how to do it correctly from someone else the situation is they don't communicate what they want or expect and when I do not meet their unvoiced wants I'm met with complaints that it's common sense to do these things when dating someone and their ex knew what to do without being asked, which that, I'm aware is triangulation
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???..
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???..
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???...
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
They give you common-sense answers rather than empathy: “Relax. Cheer up. Just be quiet for a few minutes. Go sit down if you’re upset. Get off your feet. Drink a glass of water. Go watch TV. Make yourself a cup of tea to calm down.” Passive-aggressive doesn’t open up the communication, it shuts down the conversation. Excellent vid, Stephanie.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
I just stopped dating a guy who began saying these phases when he wasn't getting what he wanted, especially when I caught him in a few lies. He was a people pleaser and got passive agressive when he needs were not being met YET he would not be honest when I asked them what his needs were so I could. So I walked! Thanks for this!
Thank you for all your information, I watch your videos and it helps me see what I wasn't sure what to call it before... abuse. My wife started out in the first month separating me from family and friends by saying we need to spend more time together and get to know each other, even gave me a key to move in saying I would be better to live with her to get closer. She talked me out of monthly poker nights and golf and now 15 years later says it was a concern that I didn't put her first She now realizes we should have had our own time and expected my friends and family to be right there like I didn't walk away from them. I was STUPID! Last week on my birthday, (we're in limbo, she kicked me out), she took me out for our 11y/o to celebrate with me and was mad I wasn't giving her enough attention and expressing enough appreciation she did this for me. I've learned more from you than the 7 counselors she has pushed me to because I have sooo many problems to fix so we can be better. Thanks again
You might also want to check out the channels Mended Light and Therapy in a Nutshell and even Put the Shovel Down. For their videos on healthy dating, relationship, communication, conflict resolution skills, healthy boundaries and how to maintain them, etc.
You might even want to scan through the titles of the videos from these channels and others I've made into a public playlist on my channel - it's titled "A1 - LIFESTUFF HOMEWORK" or something like that (this playlist is for me and my nieces and nephews and I don't make videos).
I've found these channels including Stephanie's to have the best, most useful, effective and instantly applicable information on these topics.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
✛2349066058910🖇️‽‽
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
What was astonishing to me was how easily they lied. And then tried to tell me I was crazy. It’s really insane. That break of trust can pollute future relationships. Questioning myself against my intuition was so confusing. Learning to trust my gut was huge. If there’s even a question, there might be a problem. I now have to be careful to sense reality vs past trauma. Thank you- this is amazing info and so true.
And if we are reactive to their abusive behavior, they attempt to use that as evidence of your instability. Its terrible.
I can not thank you enough for these. You have helped me deal with toxic people in my life so much.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
Story of my freakin life. ALL OF THESE WERE SAID TO ME..Not only did I get the passive aggressiveness, I was told that what I was seeing wasn't happening. Then told that, "I'm ruining everything " for letting her know she's being passive and or rude.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
I have some passive aggressive traits. I am very aware I make digs at certain things. I have realised though that I’m like that when o give to much, and expect others to give as much as I do. Then I dig at others. I’m working on this and also giving myself time to stop thinking I have to pick up after everyone.
You just described what I’ve been going through in my 30 year marriage.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
my 40 year 🙄
20th year here. I don't know how to get out.
Thank you for these videos. Not only do they help me learn from my past relationships, but I use them to self-reflect if I possess any negative / toxic traits.
Thank You
STEPH.
Love You Sister
It is very helpful and insightful to learn these things because I know I’ve picked up some passive aggressive habits from different people in my life, mainly family. I know that I want to get rid of these habits or at least learn to manage them Because I want to have healthy relationships even though that that’s new to me
One common passive aggressive phrase is "I'm sorry you feel that way" as a way to invalidate the actual reality of the problem you are bringing to them for a responsible answer.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
This Is narcisist …
Really kind and thoughtful observations Stephanie Lyn, thanks.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
This is my ex 100% I was always questioning if he was abusive or not. I got the silent treatment, the passive aggressive comments, I oftenly felt like a fly smashing into a glass wall over and over again. I'm anxious, so it really triggered me - I reacted with tears, blame, called him toxic, imature, which made him distancing even further. We got to a point where neither of us knew how to deal with it. Understanding this really opened my eyes - I will do the work on myself so I can be healthy
I just LOVE the way you talk.
As beautiful a message as Stephanie herself :)!
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
She should dress more modestly for her videos imo.
@@kimalonzo3363 ..but I want to see da (0) (0)
This is 100% my sister unfortunately - that I have been more like a mother to over her earlier years (I'm 10 yrs older). She's exhausting & has sucked the life out of me more times than I can count. I'd gotten so accustomed to her behaving this way with me & her snarky side- handed digs & I still always tried to take the high road & not take it personal, while realizing she's insecure & needs tons of attention...I actually thought I could help her. I'd let it build & then I'd eventually get so sick of it & she'd cross the line again - that is try to discuss it with her, but she'd gas light me & scoff at my feelings & cut me out of her life. It was this vicious cycle that was exhausting. Then I recently lost my adult son who I was super close to & she even did hurtful petty things when she came for his celebration of life. That was the final straw for me... I'm done taking care of her & letting her cause any more negativity in my life & it's so nice to hear you describing exactly what I have experienced with her - I finally feel validated. I spoke calmly with her & backed away...I didn't give her the opportunity to hurt me anymore - even though she tried in everyway. I realized it was that little girl that I was holding on to... not the mean vicious adult middle aged woman she is today...I truly no longer feel connected to her & my life is more peaceful! I did it very calmly & said I no longer have the energy or desire to participate in this little 2 step with you... I'm sorry, but I'm done. Thank you for your help... these histrionic narcissistic people are so destructive & yet charming to others... so they get away with it for a long time... it helps to hear you break it down.
Beautifully said, as always. Thanks for sharing.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
Thanks for the upload. yes, emotional abuse is a real thing.
ty Stephanie for all that you do to help us get through 🙂
Thank you so much for all your content 🙏🏻🤩
Very true..... I'm thankful for this video.... I learnt good things how to choice for my self....
Your videos are my -go to- for me to learn from attracting abusive partners. Thank you
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
Thank you so much for your videos they give me a lot of insight and help me navigate my life with people such as the ones in your topics
Highlighting the abuse seems to just aggravate the situation I’ve found. The other person gets mad when I highlight they’re gaslighting me or being manipulative towards me. I’m trying to set boundaries and get comfortable with saying how I feel but it always just ends with the other person getting mad. I then don’t know how to respond in a healthy way so I just stay quiet as I feel out of my depth. I’m fairly new to all of this and try to practice talking to people as much as I can but I feel completely lost mid-conversation sometimes x
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
They get mad because they want full access to you and don't like you telling them they are causing you discomfort as it distorts their view of themselves.
Do you find that the person your dealing with, deflects and turns it arpund on you when you try to highlight their bad behaviour?
If so, just walk away! You cannot fix them and its not your job to either. If they cannot handle you speaking you mind respectfully to them, its their maturity they need to work on.
Yes I can relate to this. I would love examples of different situations and how to respond. I just end up deciding I won’t get with that person again and will set firm boundaries for myself not to get with them. If it’s someone that I have to see on a regular basis, keeping the conversation very short and moving on.
I do this when I make a mistake, and the person is angry with me. I basically let the relationship go 🚶♀️ I have been that way from a child when I didn't behave perfectly, I would lose the relationship so I learned to leave first to avoid rejection.
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The guy I’m with is Weird he is nice then later he snaps. Since I’m nice sometimes I believe him but he lies or doesn’t realize he hurts me? He seems like he just doesn’t know how to love:(
He seems like he cares but then doesn’t? Since he smokes weed I think it’s that effecting him as well in a way beside him having a bad childhood history. His mom wasn’t nurturing and wasn’t there for him and especially his Dad. He said his Dad was messed up to him. But then any how I wish he can open his eyes that he needs help. We have kids together so it’s time he man’s up by seeking help to get better. Though like I said he has to be willing to seek help other than that things get over I am just so tired. It’s been 8 years since I have been hoping he wakes up. I don’t have any other support to get from family so I feel I don’t have a choice but the deal with things and be strong to push myself to not let it affect me. Though It does sometimes. God helps me. I wish I could just have healthy relationship with him or I don’t know if I’ll have to move on somehow:(. God bless everyone and this beautiful coach.
What can make it worse and happens a lot is if a 3rd person comes along and sides with the abusive person for no reason whatsoever.
After they get aggressive to get you to react they switch down and start acting the victim.
The 3rd person didn’t get to see the aggressive part as abusers normally abuse people alone but your reaction to it hence them siding with pa person.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
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Would love some examples of what to say to people who are passive aggressive. So if someone says “I didn’t know you were in a rush” what do you say to that if you know 100% they’re being passive aggressive?
My wife initiates arguments about trivial things (not programming a garage opener)(I’m lazy during a day off from work)and unfairly accuses me of untrue behavior and when I try to defend myself the argument escalates to the point of my losing my temper. Then she gives me the silent treatment lasting up to 2-3 weeks and I feel like a jerk for not controlling my emotions. The only thing that brings about conversation is an event that serves her benefit. I am on TRT and feel vulnerable to negative stimulus. I’m at my nerves last strand.
*Amazing observations and meaningful video.*
Thank you. Great video. Needed
This is fascinating and incredibly helpful! It makes me think of a lot of people in my family, particularly my mother. It’s been challenging over the past few years to realize that she is as you said a child, in the most basic sense. Terrible communication skills and not wanting to address the real issues. I’m trying to figure out if she’s passive aggressive Or narcissistic or both. It’s definitely one of those three options and I just wanna know how to handle the relationship and a healthy way. I haven’t really seen it handled properly. It would be nice to have a healthy relationship there, but if that’s not possible then obviously I would have to cut her out of my life, which I don’t want to do completely.
I’m guilty of using the “im not mad anymore” phrase because my SO gives me the silent treatment and whenever I approach him about whatever we were upset about, He doesn’t respond well to being confronted. He would rather walk away from a disagreement while I want to sort it out. Its hard to leave an issue unresolved. So I back off but I’m obviously still upset. I’ve learned my lesson with him to just drop it. Then he will come around and be like “what’s wrong?”
What am I supposed to say to that? I have already tried the “here’s what i am upset about, let’s resolve this” route and he feels like I’m overbearing or something just because I want to resolve it then and there. So my only other option is to try to drop it but I’m clearly going to look and be upset, because I am. Sometimes I feel like I’m crazy.
Am I the toxic one here? Do we both have toxic traits?
This is different from what Jo has replied, but some of us really do need time. I find it nearly impossible to resolve something I’m upset about then and there and this is just the way I process things. It doesn’t mean I’m over it or that I’m not wanting to talk. I legit can’t yet. I’m not shut down or trying to gain emotional leverage. I need to collect myself and breathe, but I do remain open and connected and present. Your spouse may be like me. You would know way better than I if your spouse is truly shutting down or neglecting communication altogether.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
I has 40 plus years of this shite. I won't, can't make an excuse for abuse of any sort. Meaning their poor sad childhood. I wish one of these videos would stop saying. " because of their childhood abuse". Stop. They are now adults. No more excuses. Having said that I got a lot out of your talk . Thank you.
I love the self-parenting thing...treating myself to milk and cookies is so comforting, however, giving myself spankings is not fun!
How do you keep calm when it’s your sister? I feel like it’s more difficult when it’s a family member.
Sometimes you’ve got to disappear. If the patterns are already established between you and sister, any pushback will likely be met with extreme resistance from her. It’s likely that she is already waiting for the pushback if it’s been bad enough. Best wishes.
@@Job.Well.Done_01 thank you!!
@@chirinegedeon355 ♥️
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
I feel so defeated after watching this... The things you say are things my narc mom says. Willing to listen (only to guilt, gas light and manipulate me) and I say I need space but need more and more space beacuse she keeps adding more and more things I need to discuss she fabricates that I have to defend. So exhausting. So I look like a huge passive aggressive jerk because she keep gas lighting me over and over again adding to the list of abuse I have to defend. This video was super triggery. I do these "healthy" things like ask for space, yet these things are used against me by the narc. My narc om says "I am willing to talk when you are ready" which is NOT TRUE. She is willing to talk to GAS LIGHT, guilt me and manipulate me back into an abusive dysfunctional relationship that I want NOTHING to do with. This is hopeless. I am at a total loss.
Is being passive aggressive something different from what a Narcissist does? Do Narcissists use this?
How to know what I am do you have any website that takes a test about it. I feel like my husband is aggressive towards me but then when I get frustrated with his bad mood I reply I’m not 😡 which you are telling me I’m passive Aggressive?
Thank you for a very helpful video.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
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On a more semantic level I would label a response that leaves you hanging with yet another question a passive offensive one. And a response that leaves you hanging with a true answer would be a passive defensive one. I dont see something wrong with the latter and I find the label of passive aggression alone a little disordering.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
Can passive aggressive people change? I’m working on my marriage where my husband was emotionally abusive. He’s going to therapy and I can see he’s trying but I am scared he will go back to this and this is just “who he is” any thoughts?
Thanks Stephanie!
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
"Coach"!!!
Is there a way to help this person be less passive aggressive? I know some one with a good heart and otherwise healthy but uses this when they’re mad. I feel like they would change if given the tools. Definitely not a narcissist.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
Make sure you like and subscribe.. wow. That is control no? Never can understand that.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆...
One more button, please.😍
Any girl can show breasts and butts but it takes a lady to show class.
But what if you want to say why you are upset but dont because the person will come back at you with what you do and gaslight you. That's why I dont even bother to explain how I feel. It just causes another argument and I dont want to go there.
They are nice nasty.
Yes they are!
Pinch then stroke !
So nasty 🤢
the only youtuber i cant listen to faster than 1.5X cuz she talks fast already lol love your vids i watch you daily you have an amazing beautiful life changing knowledge and i study so much-grateful!
it's sad cuz i have some of this passive agressivness within me.grew up in a shitty ass family and never learned how to communicate.but trying my best the last few years and so immense progress
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆
Look good mum 😘
What is a good way to respond if someone says: you should know to do (xyz) things for them without them having to tell you. Is that gaslighting?
Yes. This is gaslighting because it’s calling into question your aptitude/ability and the very different reality you may know about yourself and skills. There is an undertow of negativity and superiority in their statement. Not only do you not know how to do something (in their view), the abuser is also placing themselves on a pedestal by indicating they have better basic knowledge, basic skills etc. None of this may be true but they try to tell you this is the reality. A hallmark of gaslighting is making you doubt yourself and planting an ongoing false narrative of doubts into your psyche where previously there was peace and happiness. If you want to screw with them, just shrug your shoulders and tell them you’d rather learn how to do it ‘correctly’ from XYZ anyway. Then walk away. Watch them chase you and have a rage fit before your very eyes. Doing so is an escalation on your part but it will reveal their true and ugly nature.
@@TheQueensWish Thank you for this explanation, it helped me understand more. Although in terms of learning how to do it correctly from someone else the situation is they don't communicate what they want or expect and when I do not meet their unvoiced wants I'm met with complaints that it's common sense to do these things when dating someone and their ex knew what to do without being asked, which that, I'm aware is triangulation
Omg yes!! Had that exact phrase said to me
@@GM-wp3yy jesus that is so what I dealt with also!!! Disgustinf
Nice
💙
I wonder what your phrases were?
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???..
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆...
Finally 🤤
😍😍😍
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???..
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆...
💜♾🙏🏼🕉
1st
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆...
Can I get your Instagram handle? I’d like to ask you sth on the topics. How to get a narcissist to leave you alone. I hope you reply me…
Communication breakdown stinks
Thank you so much, really helpful
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back again my ex is back to me we loving and happily together, I got help from a great woman who brought us back together and she can solve any kind of problems. ???
十2349066058910♻️♻️🎦🚻你好，很高兴认识你...
Whatzapp her now....
👆👆👆👇👆