I'm afraid of change & can't let go
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- Опубликовано: 10 фев 2025
- I'm afraid of change and I'm struggling to let go. Still seeking my fairy tale cottage, maybe in the mountains, maybe in the woods but struggling with what moving house would mean. A relocation, a house move, giving up everything familiar, everything I know. I'm not sure I am ready to let go of what I have and I fear change more than ever now I am getting older. Maybe being in my 50's means I am getting stuck in my ways! I think we all struggle with indecision and the pain of making those big decisions so I am giving myself some time and space to process. Thank you so much for keeping me company in this little corner of RUclips. Love you all to bits, Biggest, Softest, Everythings, Wendy. Xx
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#change #moving #fearofchange
I know exactly how you are feeling. My situation is a little bit different but all of a sudden I am 81 years old and I’m not at all content with where I am and relocating right now is not an option. In 2016 I lost my husband of 51 years. Up to the time we had a wonderful life. We lived full-time in a motorhome and travel the entire United States and Canada for 14 years and then all of a sudden here I am alone. I moved to Savannah Georgia to be near my daughter because I figured at my age I need someone I can depend on in case I need help. Well, she’s been wonderful but I don’t feel at home here and I don’t feel welcome or part of the community. South. is supposed to be so friendly. Well, maybe it is for the younger generation but when you hit my age, it isn’t easy. I do a lot of hand embroidery, Crosstitch, punch needle. Have not been able to find anyone my age to enjoy these things with. The people who frequent the senior centers all seem to have lived here all their lives, and although their fairly friendly, you’re not included. I have a son who lives in Jacksonville Florida, which is only two hours away, but I don’t think I would ever go there as I’ve lived in Florida before and it’s not an option for me either. My daughter works and now they’re talking about possibly in the next 2 to 3 years moving somewhere to a lake. Well, it scares me because I’ve established all my doctors here and I can’t just pick. up at my age and move and start all over again. So I am worried about that. I have acquaintances, but not good friends and I’m very content to be in my sewing room and do my crafts but I still don’t feel like this is Home. I think my whole thing is I have no one to share it with. You are very lucky you have a partner.
Oh dear one, I hear you, so many obstacles for sure. Feeling 'home' is such an important thing.. I know it's a lot and I hear you being 81 but just to say, my momma just moved at 85! Sometimes it only feels impossible ... big loves and yes, I appreciate James very much xxx
Sending the warmest gentle hugs to you, Savanna.
I’m a crafter here in Calgary Alberta. I’ve found a lot of good companionship from vlogs on knitting, etc. I have several that I love and they are from all over the world. I’ve learned over my life that moving into a state of acceptance has helped me a great deal. You don’t have to like it, but acceptance of what is melt’s resistance to life itself and greater peace of mind develops over time. My life has had deep traumas so I’m not immune, however life is a choice. And I decide in each moment to be as happy or content as I can be. And I’ve taught myself to let go of others judgments and preconceived ideas of who I am. I simply enjoy myself and who I am. I get to be me. I wish many blessings upon you.
❤❤❤
💕
"Our spirits are restless until they rest in God" - St. Augustine
"Have you ever been in that in between place questioning where you belong and wherever you go feeling like you don't belong?" - that hit me right in the place I feel right now. Wow.
Absolutely
SAme
I am 60 years old (still can't believe it). My home since 1994 in Florida was flooded last year during Hurricane Ian. My husband and I have spent the past year wrangling with insurance companies and contractors to rebuild the house and fix the damage. The house is almost done, but I don't feel at home here anymore. It's hard to describe. I guess that feeling of absolute physical safety is gone, and I'm lucky I felt that as long as I did. The neighborhood and the town are changing immensely, and it's hard to get used to that. This place is paradise to most people, and it was to me too until last year. My happy place at the beach is completely gone. It's like the hurricane knocked me off my feet and I haven't been able to stand up since. And yes, it is harder to deal with change when you're older, but it's just a fact of life. I try to be grateful for what I have, and let go of attachments to material things. I didn't care about losing all of the furniture, but my childhood mementoes are gone and it's hard not to miss them. Thanks for letting me take this time to share with you. I wish you all of the best on your lifelong continuing journey. Go with your gut.
Its very beautiful where you live and that waterfall is breathtaking. Ask God where you belong he will let you know and when he does you will have a overwhelming peace about it. I don't know if you believe in God but all the beauty you enjoy outdoors he created it all. So give him a try he will never let you down ❤❤ much love 💕
I don't live near that waterfall but it is stunning!! Xx Thankyou I am asking God, the Universe & everyone including my heart too!! much love back ! x
Just came across the channel and I’m so loving your story telling.
I will do anything to keep that horrible anxiety in the gut away. People have given me some good advice. 1. "Wherever you go, there you are." The "geographic cure" is an illusion. 2. "Don't drive yourself crazy". Yes, we do this to ourselves. We need to question "Who put all those things in your head?" 3. "Is this trip necessary?" Back in the days of the Oil Crisis of the1970s, this was something to consider. I think it really applies even now. And even more on an existential level.
Wendy, we are with you no matter where you go, whether you are up, down, or discombobulated. Because we are kindred souls, we fully understand how you are feeling. You will get through this. Your next adventure awaits and I, for one, can’t wait to share it with you. Sending bright loving light and energy your way! ❤️❤️❤️
awww, lovely xx thankyou so much xxx bright lights to you too xxx
I think menopause was the great discombobulator for me. Not just the physical things it did to my body... but my head. I had always been a go with the flow person, very forgiving etc. But suddenly I lost all tolerance to bending for everyone else, and felt stifled by having been the home anchor all my life to make everyone else feel settled and whole. So I moved several hours away and while the first two years were hard... it's been the best thing for me. I feel like I'm my own person for the first time in my life. The wider family was shocked and dismayed that I was acting strangely and not being myself, and basically going backwards in life for moving to the county... but for the first time I was truly happy. I miss everyone, but I feel like I've grown up and making my own big girl decisions.
Fernweh, or farsickness, is also a suffering, but is less clear cut and rectifiable. It is a consuming longing to be somewhere you've never been; an aching to be in a distant and unknown land, an ambiguous yearning for anything, anywhere else, as anyone else.
HIRAETH MEANING - COMBINES NOSTALGIA, HOMESICKNESS AND LONGING...
Hiraeth is a Welsh word that is in every-day use, but which doesn't easily translate into English.
It's often described as nostalgia or a deep longing for a place or time that may never have existed, or that may have existed only in one's memories or imagination. It brings together the feelings of homesickness, nostalgia and longing or an earnest desire for the Wales of the past. Hiraeth is a pull on the heart that conveys a distinct feeling of missing something irretrievably lost - a unique blend of place, time and people that can never be recreated. The word has a complex and nuanced meaning and is an important part of Welsh culture and identity.
HIRAETH, USED IN ENGLISH UNTRANSLATED
Hiraeth is a word in everyday use in the Welsh but also the English language. Perhaps because of the translation difficulty, it is also one of a few Welsh words that is commonly used in the English language, untranslated like "bach" and "cwtch".
I think one of the most valuable lessons I learned in life, (and it was given to me by a stranger over a cup of coffee in a cafe), was that decisions aren't brick walls. We make one... it may work in our favour for a while, but eventually another decision will have to be made. Or, it doesn't work out and we make a readjusting decision to move on to the next thing. Nothing is permanent. And we have no control over anything either. Dithering and indecision leads to many years of unhappiness. Make the decision and act on it. If it isn't right, wait a bit to see if newness is making you uncertain, but then make another adjusting decision. Because if you do it that way, you may eventually find that right space for you. if you just sit and wonder, you never will! Give it a try!
Having turned 80 this year I can tell you that those wobbly feelings are real; I really really don't like change--and these past 20 years it's all been change and having to "let go" of how I've identified myself for so long...I am truly grateful for even still being here, but miss that "self" I thought of as "who I was"...ir is hard to be the last living member of your immediate family who knew you "when",,,
Thank goodness for my two children and 6 grandchildren--they keep me going......hugs, Julierose
I am the youngest of my family and just turned 55. Still a kid I know, but the loss has begun. Both my parents and one of my brothers, and friends have also passed. It feels like I'm going into a new era of loss and creating a completely different life. I'm feeling and experiencing things I've never had before and there is a lot of mental and emotional learning. After years of moving around the US, it's time to settle down and make a permanent home with my partner. Luckily, I still have her, she is presh. Hearing others who are one step ahead of me is not only eye-opening but I know will help me navigate the future.
I’m an artist turning 65 and considering a move. Not too far from my current home but nonetheless a change. Contemplating packing up, moving and resettling is daunting especially for artists because of our equipment, supplies and art collections. Trying not to talk myself out of a change is tough!!
If you are feeling the need for a change, follow it. Trust your instincts.
Best of luck . ❤
I sure hear you, am in similar heart mind and soul set, as well age and artist. Wishing you the best ever energy in your endeavors ... whatever you choose🙏🏼
Wendy and James, this has only been up for 6 hours and already 8.5 thousand Soul Tribe have watched this ..I take it as a wonderful sign of Our Love of You both xx
The older I get it's a bit of the opposite for me. For so much of the last 20 years, I've been taking care of everyone else's needs. Now, in my 50's, it's time to focus on me so I want to have some change. I'm so tired of my life being stagnate while I've been concentrating on everyone else's needs.
Dearest Wendy, sending warm soft hugs to you during this challenging time. I totally relate to everything you shared. What I do know at the tender age of 72 (in September) is that we definitely feel more vulnerable as we age. I was the consummate gypsy when I was younger, keen to experience new places. That desire has waned as I've aged. Still I desire to roam but the actuality of doing so is not as appealing. As for wanting to belong and not feeling a sense of home, I know that feeling too. I tried many different places to live..beautiful redwood forests, coastal towns in the Pacific north west, mountain villages. But nothing really felt like home, despite the beauty. At the age of 25 with two little un's in tow, my husband and I decided to move to an island we had never visited. After landing, we walked across the tarmac, and once we were far enough away from the plane, I had an over all visceral feeling. The smell and feel of the flowery, moist tropical air had me voicing immediately..."I'm home! I'm finally home!" That was 1976. And though there were reasons, years ago, that took me away a couple of times, I always felt out of sync, and pined for my island home until I found my way back. You will know it when you find that place that resonates with your soul, so no need to worry...just keep looking! As for familiarity...I think it's key to life. Especially as I age I want to see the same faces at the markets where I shop, the coffee shops and my neighbors. I feel a strong sense of balance and belonging when I have a community where people and places are familiar, where I have history and friends that have been on the journey with me in all these familiar places. Speaking of which...yes, nothing is permanent and the only thing we can count on is that everything will change. On August 8th my familiar town of Lahaina, with my familiar people all went up in flames.😭 Decades of working in galleries, restaurants, on boats out of the harbor; relationships I counted on always being there, all gone in one hellish afternoon. I sit here feeling grateful to be alive, but mourn deeply the community and beautiful town we have all lost. The loss of lives, homes, pets, and businesses will have a devastating effect on this island , no doubt, for the remainder of my life. This is definitely not how I envisioned living my golden years.😢 So, acceptance and adjustments will come into play. What else is there to do.😢 I say, yes to taking a day to chill! Its okay to do nothing. It's a way to heal and find balance. Do this for yourself as often as you need with no guilt attached. It's hard to let go of deep dreams that we have held most of our lives and I know there is a belief that we should never give up our dreams. As we age, though, we realize our limitations, whether that be physically or financially, so therefore it is okay to be realistic and alter those dreams a bit. I truly trust that you will eventually come to settle somewhere that resonates for you. I know you don't like those grey days, so I often wonder why you don't consider climates further south? I'm thinking of you and James today and sending you much Aloha across the many miles. 🌺🌴🌈 Oh, BTW, I'm your faithful viewer that told you about the beautiful 150 year old Banyan tree that grows in the heart of Lahaina. The good news is that arborist have found signs of life in her trunks, she has over 30 of them! They say she is in a state much like a coma, and hopefully with some extra care she will make it through.🙏💚🌳
Thinking of you beautiful soul and your home town all its peoples and business/ homes. May upu all rise again like the phoenix ❤
Sending healing vibes to LaHaina as all of those who have a heart there can find comfort and direction with the news demands of creation. Aloha love from afar.
Wow, you should write this story about home and the fire. Maybe begin with the Banyan tree and end with it.
@shirley-annrigby-jones8731 Mahalo for your kind, and loving words. The people of this island are strong. Interestingly, one of the mottos out there is: Maui Strong. We can only hope and work for the best for those that live here. We'll see if the powers that be truly hear and heed to the people's will. 💙🙏
@ABirdWoman Mahalo dear one for your message of love and kindness. We hope and trust that the powers that be will listen to the people.💙🙏
Oh Wendy. I'm totally with you. I'm 61, my husband is 70. We've lived in our house for nigh on 30 years. We feel we have one more big adventure left and would love to create a new home somewhere different. But the fear of losing too much of what we have is stalling us. We go round and round in circles. Sending you love and hugs that you can break through your own fears to find what you're looking for.
I hear you, it's not a 100% one way thing... I'm currently in a 50/50% thing!! haahah! good luck t you too!
Hi Jan, I’m 63 and my husband is 67 and we are in the exact same situation as you are. The fear of losing what we have but needing a new adventure. We have only lived in our present home for 8 years and so I don’t have a real emotional attachment to it. I’m a bit of a gypsy and we have moved down to free up funds. We are currently supporting my 89 year old mum so we can’t do anything at the moment and I think that if we could make a decision we might feel differently. Oh what will we do! Take care you guys x
Understand COMPLETELY. I live in a unique & beautiful area on California's north coast. Half my life here, half in San Diego. Traveled. For the past 10+ years I've been restless...should I stay or should I go? I've explored other places to move🤷. Nothing clicks. Yet, I know I won't stay here. I've accepted that I'm in a holding pattern...🤔maybe due to world events. Sooo I've spent the last 5 years downsizing, maintaining the house & landscape. I'm hearing "get ready to go, WHEN we tell you WHERE you need to be ready to go. Do not wait for the plan before you get ready....rather, get ready & the plan will meet me.
oh yes, exciting, it will show when it's ready xx
We looked for our house for 2 years and by accident, found it and have been happy there for 14 years. I needed a car after 10 years without in our dear house too far from the city and with too little public transport. I showed patience by telling myself "It's OK to wait. The longer I wait, the more I save and the less I make credit: it's twice OK!". I found a SUPER MEGA deal and I will have it tomorrow. So tell yourself, too, that it's OK. The universe will then have a much clearer view of you to see in you this deep desire for YOUR house, YOUR home. If the fog of impatience and disbelief prevents the universe from seeing what we really want but when it finally sees clearly, it aligns all the planets to give you what you want deep inside you: *
It’s been a rollercoaster year for us, trying hard to keep my lights shinning bright.
So many of us going through hard times with tough decisions to make.
I wish everyone could find their safe haven
Gentle hugs to everyone ❤
My husband and I are 75. We sold our big house in Pennsylvania and we moved to a small villa in central Florida. Our big house was filled with many decades of collections and various treasures. The move to Florida fulfilled my dream to create a minimalistic life. We gave things to our children and charity. There are times when I miss some of my things. Letting go of my things gave me the push I needed to move on into this last decade of our lives. All my life I’ve been an artist. I take my art, the desire to make art everywhere I go. Wishing you peace and contentment. Change is difficult for me, too. The unknown can be very ‘ ‘ discombobulating ‘’!
thanks for sharing and wishing you much happiness in your new place xxx
Gosh I understand so much. I’m hitting 60 this year, I’m living in a place with no outside space and no community and I feel I do not belong here at all. I feel I have no purpose and I need to be somewhere peaceful to achieve this, the middle of a city feel so claustrophobic.
I stood this morning and decided that I have so much clutter in my life and maybe that is what’s holding me back. I’ve tried decluttering but I almost feel I need a huge skip and put my whole life in it and just pick out a few important things and run with them. Maybe then the right move will be more clear as well. 😊
yes, maybe clear the space and things will start to clear energetically for you... show you the way as it were... xxx good luck
I am not sure anyone can feel really comfortable and at home until they leave this world and return "home". There is no perfect paradise; it seems there is a trade-off no matter where you settle yourself. But do trust your feelings and instincts - they are our best gauges.
Watching this video is me “taking a moment “. Thank you ❤
I took myself on an 8-day cruise to Alaska to have that separation from my home and challenges to see what evolved… came home and realized I had been sacrificing my SELF to others all over the place and am beginning a new rerouting of taking care of me first.
Thank you for your description of your No Plan Plan. I can see how centering in a creative space like your studio, and allowing perfect freedom to potter and play is restorative. I've noticed that even tidying up my creative space is self care. It soothes my soul.
I so hear you Betsy, me too, truly the best in times like this... xxxx
You will find your new comfortable 😊 A lot of what you're feeling comes from a lack of control so just letting go and allowing the universe to look out for you can do wonders, open doors you didn't know existed. At 40 I left everything I knew and loved and moved to a new country, familiarity and comfort slowly creep back in to your life without you realising and soon you are reminded at just how small the world is, that friends are family are still close and new ones are made. Sending hugs 🤗
Dearest Wendy, I think, as you said, that the unsettling feeling is because you know deep down it's time to move, to change, to find your home. I am the type who doesn't like changes but because of my ex husband (of 30 yrs marriage) job and "etc " "I have ended up moving 5 times across the country. Each time I went kicking and screaming! But each time I settled in, made a nice home for my kids and my self , it seems to take me about 3 years (yes!) to really make someone else's home feel like my own. And then, boom, 'honey we have to move again". Did you notice he's an ex now. lol. Anyway, my main point is that I found that my real home is within me and I took it with me everywhere I went. I found that no one house is absolutely perfect and that you have to pick what you want to compromise on without going on a journey for the perfect house that you will never find. Location is utterly important, a warmth to feed your soul, the rest you can make happen eventually. Ive realized that, even though it scares me so much to move, each time I've done it , it was ok! It was even more than that because a couple of those homes really enriched my creative spirit (the beautiful Berkshires in western Massachusetts) and gave me my love of living in the country (where I live now in rural Idaho) Change was good. Remember the quote: "When you come to the edge of all that you know, you must believe one of two things: either there will be ground to stand on, or you will be given wings to fly." - O.R. Melling Trust your wings, Wendy! sending you love and courage.
That quote is beautiful, I haven’t read that before, thanks for sharing!
Turning 60 this October, and now finally okay with the fact that the face in the mirror is older! we do love our plants and you definitely need a home with a garden!
Awww happy birthday for then Tracy! and yes! I really doooo!!!!! Xxx
Pottering and puttering, nourishing the plants, folding fresh laundry, filling the bird feeders…it is enough.
Oh the joy of no-mans-land. Even when we want to make big changes, need to even, it can be scary.
Then the voice of doubt chimes in, unbalancing us with what if this, or what if that?
You got this Wendy, relax into it. Trust all is well & remember, you are a warrior fairy.
Sending you a big hug & cheering you on from the beyond the screen ❤
Have you ever had that feeling "that you fit in and were finally at home"? I moved my entire life and learned that Home was inside me like the saying "No matter where you go, there you are". I learned that all my fears hopes and dreams were inside me, so I couldn't just move away from them or towards where I think they are or with whom I'm with. I had to learn to ask myself "does this support me or hinder me?" when it comes to people, places and things I was moving towards. Through the years I have learned that when I am truly being me, open and courageous, I will attract what/who supports me.
so true, I feel some truth in that for me but also, place matters to me too... xx you are so right about the courage part too.. xx
Hi Wendy ! I am 59 and have been looking for a new place to call home . A place with nature where I can feel like I belong . This video was truly wonderful for me to see . When you dance it makes me smile because I like to dance gives a sense of freedom and happiness. This gave me Valuable insight I needed today .
Thank you, I so needed this video. I moved to busy Sydney to help my children get diagnosis and early intervention for Autism, what followed was a five year battle with almost every government agency…diagnosis for four of my children and myself, continued battles for support and I’m burnt out and long for the bush or country. Unfortunately Australian bush/country can see you fighting off spiders the size of a lunch plate. It is so hard when renting to feel safe that you’re not going to have to move, one step away from homelessness constantly. Now it would be very difficult to move as we are finally starting to build community, friendships and supports. What I need is a little slice of heaven like the country cottage within the suburbs? I leave it to God and if Iam meant to go something will just present itself, until then I try to create heaven where Iam. Thank you I found this video so helpful in my own reflection of not belonging. Wishing you both the very best and hope you find your balance of needs and dreams…much love Marnie🫶🫶🫶
I'm feeling like being at home most of the time lately. All of the sadness and grief and pain of the world is taking a toll on me. My heart aches for the animals in distress all over the world, Maui, Greece, other areas of natural disasters.
I can relate; I've never felt at home or comfortable, or that I belong ANYWHERE. I"m now in my mid 60's. I've watched countless vlogs, read books, meditated, prayed...I've decided it's the human condition. We're probably most at home in the next world. I envy those who just 'know'.
Yes when we are in heaven
I long to be there
I am dealing with losing my husband of 57 years to Dementia, I would give anything to be able to go back and to realise that nothing matters if you have and love each other, I would give up anything to have him back. You will find your home so in the meant time just love and enjoy each other and appreciate every moment spent together no matter where you live. Good Luck
And you will find it. Love Carol
You've got this fairy girl. Where you are right now is exactly where you are meant to be, in order for the next step forward to reveal itself. how about going out and buying a new plant in a pot meant specifically for your "new/next" home, and then quietly wait and watch as the beautiful little living thing attracts it's and your new home into your energy field. And in the meantime you have treated yourself to a little bit of retail therapy - green therapy 💚💚
Change is always inevitable. I had a wretched Life as a child and so I was always happy for any change that brought something different in my life. And it has served me well over the years I am now 81. I have moved more times than I have fingers and toes. And what I discovered is that home is in my heart and so wherever I am I am at home. The other thing I discovered that really has served me well as a saying I came across and I don't know who said it first but it went something like this. Love the life you're living while you're waiting to get to your new life. I don't know if any of this will help you but I hope so and I believe that you will find what it is that your heart needs
wise and true, thankyou xxxxxx
Running commentary is a trouble people have in my presence. I wonder what they'd think of they knew I did that when alone, as well?
Love to you, dearest Wendy. Thank you for reminding me to do the body scans, check in with myself and sit with whatever feelings come up.
✨✨✨
Hello, thanks for sharing! I've decided to move back to France after 26 years in London. I'm scared too. I have to sell the place and buy one in France, that's the plan. First, I need to tidy, throw things away, give away, sell. I've started but it takes ages!! We accumulate so much stuff, especially as I love books, stationary, paint...
oh gosh, i feel you... so much stuff! Good luck and happy new adventures!! xx
I really love the quote your friend said, "The pain in decisions lies in indecision." It is so true. Not long ago I was trapped in the stressful pain of indecision about my career path for a few weeks. It was horrible, eventually I figured it out, now I just have to do all the hard work to make it. I've also been trying to find where I want to move to and settle down, but haven't been attracted to any place in my home country (yet I don't want to leave because I have cats that I don't want to fly around). I can't move for a few more years anyway, but I like to have goals, and knowing where I want to be is part of it. So, I can feel your pain about trying to find were you belong, it's tough. I do know this (and maybe you'll find comfort in it, I don't know, everyone is different), I used to live in Taiwan. I just up and left my home country and my family and moved to a country I've never been before but had a strong pull towards. My time in Taiwan was the best years of my life so far. Life there is very different from life in my home country, the culture, the language, it took a lot of adapting, but it was those differences that made me grow and learn so much more than I ever would have if I just stayed in my home country. I'm not suggesting you leave England, but I think, going to a new and different place might enlighten or even better your life in ways you would never have expected. You might eventually think 'why didn't I do this sooner?' Anyway, change is scary, uncomfortable, and stressful, but we can grow so much from it. I do hope that your troubled thoughts can settle down and that you can find happiness wherever you go. Wishing you the best on this new adventure! 🥰
Oh Wendy, that rain looked so lovely. It's been very very hot here and we haven't had rain in almost a month. The green grass is now brown and crunchy. It's horrible. And yes my sweet friend I too fear change. I hope you and James can find your special place. But Home is where your heart is. Please tell James hello. Sending love and big hugs Sherry ❤ ❤❤
keep cool dear Sherry, will do, he's just out on a bike ride atm, but as soon as he gets back! and big loves back!!
Wendy, thank you so much for sharing, I feel exactly the same and feel stuck, stressed to stay but scared of the unknown. I think age is a factor, I get worse with age, (I'm 60), sending you blessings x
blessings to you too!! xxxx
I am in the same place. We retired and moved to a smaller house, it was supposed to be for two years. We were going to shop for a country house. But we have been here seven years and I like it. I had a serious illness and needed a lot of services and medical care. Now I am well but wondering if aging out in the country is a good idea. What if something happened to one of us and the other were alone?
I belong to the stars, Earth is just a temporary experience and one day we will return to our true nature. Those who don't feel home is because you have disconnected from your true essence in order to live this experience. You will feel home again as soon as your reconnect with your divine self, higher consciousness. My human aspect has also been thinking of relocating, but don't know where yet. Is not bad where I live but at the same time I like a change of scenery. For me is important to be surrounded by nature, but not too far from civilization. I also struggle with the weather here in the UK, so I've been thinking that maybe the best thing is to go abroad. I am Libra so being indecisive is part of my life 😅
I’m in that phase now I’m 50:and not knowing where I belong where I need to go…. Change for me is absolutely frightening. My only child my son is in his senior year of high school so next year he will be off to the military. I’ve been a stay at home mom for 14 1/2 years. I don’t know who I am outside of that. So starting this new journey of reinventing myself, and finding out who I am it’s just absolutely daunting the world is so different now BUT I know I’ll get through this and find my place ❤ I loved this video I really needed it thank you 😊
Empty nest is very scary... and emotional.. I know... you will find some beautiful unexpected treasures, xxxx
Wendy. I have enjoyed your videos for several years now. This video reflects the feeling I ofttimes find myself facing. When you express your anxieties and being stuck or fearing the steps forward, it makes me feel so much less isolated. Thanks for your honesty and bright shining spirit. I love you Woman! Greetings to James. He is a Knight in Shining Armor!
🌛🌝🌜
I appreciate this video so much, as someone in my late 50s who has been searching for *home* and belonging for several years ❤
“From indecision into the transition into the knowing”
I so appreciate how you articulate the subtlety of the steps - the little steps in between the big steps - helps me slow down and honor the process I am in, to step out of the feeling of crisis and see that all the inner crises are showing me all the subtle steps of coming into the knowing for the next big steps. All the little and big fears are part of that weighing, of what to let go to go to what is next and true.
Thank you for honoring the struggle and the little steps between the big steps that allow the turning to the next becoming.
Your presence in what you share and then sharing it helps me recognize the validity in all my little steps too.
Thank you.
Ɓeing in this crazy world and all the wars and conflict is rising up in us all because we are one world. Like a big cell. After 50s I did the same. Going through the change is a constant revolving door.Even now, in my 60s, sleep and digesting is a big adjustment. You're so blessed to have a home in James and he in you.Life is a mountain! then we die. I am working on having a blast on the terrains!
So much comfort in this video.
I’m exactly in that limbo. Nothing settled, everything seeming uncertain. Hoping for the best, trying to find my calm, and find my place.
Thank you, Wendy - I don’t feel so alone in these feelings now. ❤️
glad to hear that xx thankyou, sorry you are in the same boat... wish you much fortune finding your place... xxx we got this!!! xxxx ps, you are not alone x
Astrologically speaking you might be feeling like this all the way until 2025. Saturn in pisces is really messing with us, and feeling lack of belonging or a lot of uncertaintly is bound to be a theme for us. I don't know your chart specifically, so I can't give you advice. (I don't do readings) But regardless, these are uncertain times.
❤🌟✨🌼🙏🏻 Yes I know it and I have started to declutter my home into more minimalism to get ready for my next steps
😂😂I love the way you talk yourself in and out of all the discombulation. The aging process is no joke. I am there with you exactly. ❤
hahha! I try!! No joke no!! big loves xxxx thanks for being with me!!
Dear Wendy, So nice to see you on my Sunday morning. I have been through somewhat similar journeys. Have moved a lot to find that place. The last move was when I was 59. It totally knocked me off center. What I have found in the 2 years since then is that, home is within me and that the settled feeling will come with time. I am a very sensitive beast as you are. You must give yourself time and space to readjust to your new goals. It is in part because you are older now, when we are younger (even in our 40s) we are more resilient, we are still resilient but it just takes a bit more time to adjust. Much love to you. Thank you. -Anne
This resonates so much, the liminal space and the challenge of letting go of the need to know, getting out of our own way and making a choice. So thank you for talking to this and showing up fully as the magical one you are. Home really is inside us and following your soul's song, although sounds easy, is so hard when we keep getting in the way! I feel your magic and am blessed to have found your channel. So much love to you, from another who struggles to find a place to belong (I sense it's part of being human) 🌙✨💜
You will know home when you find it and there will be peace.
Change is scary but it always seems to sort itself out. You are going to fine! Much love
So much to say here. So I'll keep it simple. Don't let fear steer your choices. Try and be objective about your reactions to thoughts regarding change. Your journal should help you here. Anyway, having listened to you over the last two years, I know you know how to handle your thought processes, it is just that sometimes we forget! I know I do. I am 61 and not only moving house, but also moving to a home on my own as after 28 years with someone, I just want to feel space to think and express and it is scary. Completely understand the yo-yo nature of decision making. As I say, try and make decisions from a place other than fear. The moment is all we ever have, the past has gone and the future we can decide how we react to it when it arrives. I live in Wales and it is home. Just a hint!
Oh yes! Body messages, butterflies, intuition, whatever you call it, it’s definitely real. You’ll know what to do if you block out the noise. We recently moved (I say recent, in the last 18 months) we downsized from a huge home, 2 of everything sort of home where we raised the kids. I checked in with myself and realized I no longer wanted or needed all that any more and we moved to a wee cottage. I tell you I have never been happier in my life. This new place is simple, cosy, unpretentious. It feels so right and it’s the best decision for me, for us at this time. You’ve got this hunny. It’s time for you to nest ❤
You have such lovely eyes, take off your glasses more often! So warm and expressive.
The universe works in the strangest ways! Just when I felt that I could not bear any more change, your video popped up!! I actually cried! I cried! I turned fifty in March, and, I have felt this total change in me. I want to cocoon, as you say. I want to be safe in my comfortable home and I want to just insulate. But, I am, and always will be a mother, with responsibilities, and, as much as I feel the need to cocoon, my children are my priority! I would not have it any other way. l am American, born and raised here. In America, educational laws are quite different, and, I chose, as a qualified teacher, to teach my children myself. I think it has been a wonderful experience! I would not have done it any other way. My oldest son, 26, is a photographer, and is moving to a Caribbean island. My daughter, 24, is a fine artist, and loving every minute of her life. My next son is a musician, just about to embark on a musical adventure, so, now, we are here with my youngest son. My youngest, 16, got accepted into a school, and, it is an extraordinary opportunity, yet, it means, I must move far away, so that he could go. And, not only that, but, my husband would have to stay, as, we have obligations in the home we are living in now. My musical son needs to stay, as, he has opportunities that arose before my youngest was accepted. Since my husband and I have never been apart for the thirty, almost thirty-one years we have been married, it is an extremely hard decision to make. I totally understand your fears. I think, as one gets older, it gets harder to make changes. Turning Fifty has totally shown me another side of myself. Anyway, your video definitely came at the right time. I am so grateful you are here. I wish you the very best.
I just made a big urban getaway 2 years ago and am now coming out of a phase of thinking I made a big mistake.... it is an adjustment and now I am living a quieter life close to Nature and am 71. It is good really and different. Yes, change as you age is not as easy for sure. Also, it wasn't an easy move nor and easy relocate as renovations were needed. It is all much better and overall I am glad. Wish I had done it at your age though! The Universe always has your back!
"Inwards we go so Outwards we flow" by Wendy (Love the idea of this phrase on a sticker or postcard of your new Miracle Fairy!!)
It was really relatable to hear you speak about your fears, your concerns about life. It's somehow comforting to know that we all go through these stages, regardless of our age. I think it's because it's easier to connect with one another.
Speaking for myself, I might feel like a change like that shouldn't affect me so much, but we'd be surprised to know how hard it is to let go of the things that are already familiar. I've come to realize I too struggle a lot with big changes, and that's okay. We just have to be patient with ourselves.
I have accompanied you in your videos for a few months now, and I love everything about the work you put into them. And I also love your plants!
I'll be 58 next month. My youngest moved into the dorm a week ago. And a few days later, we had a family emergency with another son. It's kind of been resolved, but my life is not my own for the foreseeable future. And I can barely think, much less plan anything. And, my husband and I just completed another step on the way to moving next year. So, yes, I can understand being uncomfortable with change!
I made the move 150 km away to the ocean. Best thing I ever did. New life, lovely now settled life...all good. Take a deeep breath make the decision and then go for it!
I’m in this position now. I own an old restored home in the country, and it was my dream to find this place and live here. I now have the opportunity to move in with the love of my life at his larger, newer home, a truly gorgeous place with acreage. I know that we will have a lovely life there and it is another dream to be with him in that place. But it is so hard to think of leaving behind my sweet little cottage with its winder stair in the kitchen. I have to let go of the old dream to embrace the new dream and the change that comes with it.
I know exactly how you feel. I turned 63 and I decided to quit my job of 19 yrs for my own mental health. To try something new and it has worked I feel wonderful.
I'm seeking home too. My only real home was when I was a child and lived with my parents. That's my memory of HOME. Now, as my parents are not in this world, and it's just me and my husband and our two dogs, at 51, we are trying to leave the country and move to Portugal. No place is perfect but like I've always said, you exchange some problems for others you feel are more tolerable. I am on the same wave as you, I feel similar things. What is home? I am open to build a family, which as we know, a family can be anywhere and anyone so long as the intentions are there.
Sincerely, thank you❤I’ve found your channel, and subscribed immediately! I’ve found it to be such a favourite way to see the world through your nature walks and to listen to your stories and thought struggles and solutions and just being so mindful and true to yourselves. so beautiful ❤️ life lived truthfully throughout your journey is not one for faint of heart but one of being honest❤. I too am in my 50’s, as a matter of fact I’m just about to embark on the 60 ‘s coming up in April! It’s so lovely to have been privileged to listen to and see your art, your cottage shopping , the hikes and the heart felt thoughts you have as you just “go along your way” So again, thank you for making my days so lovely. ❤I can tell you that your channel is making an impact in Canada and all over the world I’m sure .
I crave somewhere I can put down roots and build community and connections. I've moved a lot in my life and have found somewhere I feel comfortable but will have to move from soon. I am taking a leap of faith and hoping that it will all work out in my new home which is totally different from anything I have lived before. I am currently stuck between the two lives, old and new! Overwhelmed and a bit anxious. Still in need of roots and connections. I'm being gentle with myself today. One small step at a time. Once a decision has been made it may feel better?! Very good to have James with you for the journey, hope one day I will find someone to hold my hand through life's changes x
I’m over the moon that I’ve found your channel.
Oh, Wendy, I hear you. I am so not comfortable with change and it seems as we get older there is so much of it (I turned 60 this past January). I'm torn between the sure thing of where I am and a little wanting for something new. I feel if I don't try something new I'll be stuck with regret and I already have some of that weighing on me. Change is just so much harder as we get older. I'm not sure how to proceed and letting go of what we know is so so hard. xo
I recently went on holiday to Tenerife and I realised then that home is Britain, wherever that might be in Britain. The ground, the roads, the trees, the shops, my history, family. I've lived in many places in Britain, and although I have a home in a town, my home really exists everywhere I have lived since childhood. They are all a part of what I am. Moves are so good for the soul...a new outlook and new creativity 😊
My dear sweet gypsy...let all of those fairies wrap their arms around you and hold you. Be still and know. Know that things are always working out for you. As they say the adventure is in the getting there. You will get there and you will see that everything happened the way it did because it HAD to. You are so lovely and joyful, thank you for sharing.
Im in a need of a change too, big time! And i know i have to let go of many things, many of those i care about, those i gathered for many years, my hobbies, projects and my art...
I don't know and i didn't find my direction yet... But i know i need the change and i need to let go in order to be happy....
To find the place to call home! 🧡🙏
Oh my gosh Wendy. Just half an hour after watching Michael Rosen perform We're Going on a Bear Hunt, I settle down to watch your (most welcome) video. We lost our beloved 'little black panther' Violet 😿in June and some days are so hard to get through. We've got to go through it! has been my mantra for ever xxx
Beautiful video Wendy! You shared so much wisdom. At 69 I’ve moved a lot myself, and I finally realized that I have the ability to make almost anywhere my home. It’s true, the location, and especially for me community, are important. But to your point, nowhere is perfect so like a snail I’m happy to bring what I need along with me. I’d like to move in the next few years… And I liked another of your other great points, which is that it’s good to let my soul get ready for it without planning or pushing, just start to live in wonder what’s next. I can tell you have some news, and it will be fun to find out what that is!
Wendy, I was touched by your words about belonging. I have had similar feelings in the past. What I had to do was to realize the place I belong is in my own heart. I will never move away from there. It goes with me wherever I happen to adventure. It is my home. I hope this helps you find your belonging space.💜
Being grateful for the small things helps one to focus on what’s really important.
As we age our stamina and physical strength begins to wane.
Understanding our limits and what is realistic can be freeing and grounding.
Accept the change of life and where we want to be. When we’re of an age where we truly need security and people around us that we trust.
I’m talking about family.
Being close and near our loved ones is important because time flies by so quickly.
Living in a pleasant, healthy and a close to nature place is the right thing to strive for but it also needs to be realistically manageable and practical as well.
Listen to your body messages because they may be telling you that you’re overly anxious
over- thinking.
Just accept each day and be grateful for what you have; like your gorgeous studio, your art and the pretty home that you have right now. God Bless you. 💕🌸
I can totally understand. My life is upside down, living with my mother whose now housebound plus and within a mile of my own home where two of my sons and my pets are. So is the husband but my situation has given me the space I needed from him. At 56 I'm facing things I didn't think I would be having to, nothing is settled, I was medically retired June 2020 and of course we had covid and it was when I became moms carer but then full time last August. As I type it's just hit me that it's been a whole year.
One thing I know you will come through this. You have a strong relationship and this can be the big difference. Many best wishes 🙂
I lived in the mountains, 20 miles from a town. I loved it for 20 years, but as we got older it was a much too difficult life. Keep that in mind about being too far from medical services and convenience in everyday life.
I never do well in the in-betweens, especially when I don't know what lies on the other side. Some people can thrive on that, but I think the older we get, the more difficult it is. It's easy when you are young and have a life ahead of you that is full of possibilities. But after decades of falling flat on my face and struggling to pick myself up, the in-between really makes me question if I can do that one more time. Of course I can, but I don't want to go through the usually painful process. And it's because I always forget that picking myself up isn't always painful and that always there is a place of beauty and peace, not to mention wonderous just waiting for me to find it. I truly feel your pain and understand your discombobulation (wonderful word!). Sometimes you just have to take life a day at a time, and sometimes it's a breath at a time, or even a heartbeat at a time.
Hi Wendy! 63 and my hubby died a little over 3 years ago, completely unexpected of a massive heart attack. After the recession in the USA, we were underemployed. My husband was a pastor and we were looking to relocate. I had homeschooled my kids for 24 years. He got a job in another state snd we moved, the first time moving to another state, Massachusetts to North Carolina, he passed 8 months later. My daughter had moved in with us pregnant and had her three year old grand-daughter, her husband had been having affairs. So when my husband passed, Covid hit 4 months later, and then we had the baby, and then I got pneumonia and many health issues. I guess grief and unsurety do that. I had no income, so my husband’s church denomination have helped me. As my daughter moved on, I moved back to Massachusetts (New England) to live near a son. I have five children, no one to move in with, not necessarily what I would want to do because I love decorating, art (since I was a child), but no one to wake up to, wake up with, communicate with. I listen to Christian radio, I watch you! My landlord won’t let me have a pet, so I had to leave my 11 month puppy behind. My apartment is beautiful. I go to a small church group and have made a couple friends. They have their own families. I have the Lord, and many may say well if you have the Lord, why do you feel the way you do? We are human. My husband was my best friend. He and I could talk about anything. I don’t know how long I will have finances, my body is struggling; lungs from the pneumonia, then I got Covid for 6 weeks and bronchitis 2 weeks after that. It has been crazy. Got rear ended in my Jeep in July, so paperwork for that. Problem solving every day for all other things not mentioned here. I get that upset stomach,IBS, head whirls and am on meds. I was hoping I would get better. Trying to maintain that goal. I think many of us don’t feel like anywhere is home, even trying to make it one. Heaven for me is what I know will be my destiny Trying to spend time with others, but they have had their lives. Can’t travel because of finances. I have an art space, but do I get there? No, because my schedule is doctors appointments almost daily, and solving problems. I ask for help, and some problems I feel need to be cared for now. I feel like I know what is most important but there can be at least 5 per day. I can’t force people to help, boundaries are needed I know. So I am trying to live literally moment by moment, staying in prayer, resting, cancelling appointments if I just can’t take one more and let my life in the Lord’s hands. You look beautiful in the scene when you are in your home. Am not sure why you and your honey have to move, and everything looks so lovely. I live in a three floor apartment with a little balcony. I love it, but have to admit, I love watching your area in England, gorgeous , the waterfalls, the cottages! I hope and pray you find a cottage, and another studio if not in the cottage. The art piece you show in this video that you are working on in Patreon is my favorite. I want to encourage you and thank you so much. I feel like you are my friend which sounds weird because we have never met. You are the first that shows up on my RUclips. Contentment is what we are learning, do you agree?
You sound like how I was feeling before I started HRT, I'm now feeling great, since starting the hrt journey.Hope you're OK ❤
Thank you for your videos they are lovely.❤
I was thinking the same! Astrologically, with Saturn in Pisces until may 2025, hormonal issues will come up and rise in the collective. Hopefully advancements also, but I really like that you noticed the same behavior. It crossed my mind as well! How long have you been on HRT?
@@ln2129 about a year then I had to stop for a hip operation, and omg I felt awful, anxiety, just totally not myself, felt dreadful, then I went back on them this march and I feel myself again.x
@@ln2129 can you tell me more what the relevance of Saturn being in Pisces until May 2025? I keep hearing this quote but don’t understand the significance of it. Thank you.
Oh and I replace my car with a Toyota van ..Got seats taking out and put camp bed in and esky and set off the back up when you lift rear door up with all the kitchen stuff ,camp stove etc . Just went on a 4 day holiday too a lovely little town 4 hrs away had the best time . I go too get my mail and library DVD,s from where I used too live 20klms away at the coast once week . Take my flask hot water for coffee and my lunch and sit by the sea in my van ..as winter here at the moment ..was the best thing buying the van .
I am so with you! I been hemming and hawing but suddenly last week I decided YES! SELL this house. Move south. and I am suddenly HAPPIER because I resolved to sell and go. Im getting too old to take care of this house and I want to downsize to a nice apartment in Florida. So I am cleaning up and getting ready. I have so much to downsize and minimize. But Im doing it. My new motto is NO MOW NO SNOW!!! hahahahaha. Im too old to mow this big yard and I can't afford to pay someone.
My husband and I are semi-nomadic and also in the in-between place. Our change has to feel right and there has to be unity. Sending love as you & James make decisions.
Hello beautiful lady , I came across you recently ,then just this morning I couldn't believe it , it was like listening to myself, since I was a baby , mum filled me in on my first few homes I would not of remembered , I am at the moment living in a small beautiful village 6 miles outside Swindon , and this is my 66th home , I don't own it,all my children are grown znd flown the nest and now just hit 74 a d planning to move to France I've lived on my own for the last 17 years in good health , starting French for beginners in September ,I think part of the reason for constantly on the move dad was in the forces so was y exhusband but my sister who was also brought up constantly on the move has lived in the same house for 33 years so it's must admit met some very nice people along the way ,I'm hoping for next year , have sent all my needs out to the universe now I wait with bated breath who knows could be the final move . I know think if it's meant to be it will, happen ,❤❤❤❤❤
ohhh so exciting, good luck! xxxxxx or should I say bonne chance! xxx
Keep all the best bits, release the negative ones ... Every situation will have both, perfection is elusive ... Your intuition will serve you well ... Listen to it, there will be no mistakes
Yes, resignates very much! Thank you for sharing how so many of us feel; it opens the door for honesty within ourselves.
Oh Wendy, I totally get what you are feeling, I find myself in a similar phase of life. It can be so very stressful and confusing, not to mention cranking up the anxiety! I love the thought of being caught in a washing machine, James is so smart!! If that is the case, then we should rejoice at knowing that when we emerge, all the gunky stuff of life will be washed away and we can start fresh again with clearer vision....I hope!!! I can almost feel your angst as you speak. I shall lift prayers of calm for you. I have found it best that when "stuck" in a situation you cannot control at the moment that is full of "what ifs", to just give it no power at all. Write it down on a slip of paper, fold it, and place it somewhere telling God "here it is, my worries, headaches, biggest pains...I can't hold on to this anymore, I give it to You as You know best." And walk away! Easier said than done but it does help clear the mind clutter some. Encourage yourself to just be in this moment until you feel the strength to revisit it again. To use one of my favorite funny quotes "Not my circus, not my monkeys!!" LOL!!! On a positive note, how is it that your complexion looks so incredible under such stress? You just seem to glow, whereas my skin is a mess under stress!! Good for you!! Have a blessed week and take time to relax mind, body, and soul. Your Fairy of Miracles looks very wise, I'm sure she will inform you when the time is right! ❤
Moving is very stressful. It involves so much energy, before, during, after
We have been in this exact process since November of last year. We have moved 3x in that amount of time and not out of our desire to move. We had to and that has made feelings of “ in between “ the constant
We are moving right now and we know this is temporary. We have much to figure out and looking forward to the Knowing as you are describing. We are collectively in an uncomfortable transition, things are rapidly changing for us all. Sending hugs for your heart and know you are not alone. Tell the little ones inside of you that you are with them, it’s ok to be scared, and cuddle with them in the cocoon. I find talking to the inner littles physically reduces anxiety. Sending love 💕
I feel for you. We are having the same experience here. It is a little frustrating not having a clear idea of what is next, where you’ll land next. Everything will always work out in the end. Thank you for sharing. It is good to know we are not alone and others are going through a similar journey. I can’t wait to find home. All the best to you in your search. 🙏🌸🌿💖
Thank you for all your good advice too 🙂💖
May you find home soon too !!! xxxxxxxx
Sweet Wendy we will always be with you!!! You’re a very sweet and caring soul!❤️❤️❤️
I’m in a similar place in my life. Adjusting to find a balance can be very taxing. I’m really looking fwd to Fall, this Summer has just worn me out emotionally💔 stay strong! Savor the process
My life just flipped over completely and I am learning to just go with it. Went from married, kid in school, house in the country, job, preparing to make a move to a homestead, with all the things I would need to soon to be divorced, kid off to college next year, small apartment in the city, change of career fields and learning to navigate a whole new life, at 49. We can do this! Sometimes letting it ALLLLLL go is the best thing that can happen. My only requirement in my tiny apartment is that I have space for my studio set up, a safe space for myself and my cats and dog, a space for my son to come to when he is home and access to be able to walk to groceries, parks, trails, libraries and events. It all came to fruition!
I am in a spot where things are going to change much more quickly that I thought. Forces beyond my imagined control are in play. I am waiting to see how things shake out. Right now, that's best. Today I am cleaning, painting a little, watching our animals.....in excessive heat for the next few days.....and being amazed at the hummingbirds at the feeders. Tomorrow will be back into the stress pool where I will do my best.
I feel you would be very happy and content if you lived 'in nature'..the Welsh cottage was certainly that'.. very beautiful but, honestly Wendy, so much time, effort and money to make it a comfortable home - it would be relentless..then there is the walkers track in view of the cottage.. we moved to Wales 7 years ago and absolutely love being here so, yes it would be a good place to relocate... are you strong enough, physically and emotionally, to take on that cottage...I feel that is your dilemma..wishing you well dear Wendy xx
Wish you all peace and love for yourselves in your hearts today!
Wow, I guess a few of us are feeling that way. I think I am around the same age as you Wendy. I work from home, but I know I would benefit from an outside studio space. I need that external, but no chance it seems where I currently live. I moved here to study. Now my studies have finished. I like it here but does not feel like home. I definitely feel in an in between space and wanting to move to somewhere more permanent. After years of moving and living abroad I would like to settle somewhere. I also would like to be nearer family, though where some of them live that does not feel like home or the kind of community I want to be in..
Then there is the fear of packing up and moving, and re-establishing oneself in a different community.
I am also not sure where I want to take my work, themes etc.
I think it is very important to have gratitude for what you do have. I think you’re right about breathing, meditating and journaling one’s thoughts etc.
I also got health issues I am trying to get on top of, some menopause related.
I think you’re brave to share how you feel, and show your vulnerability. I think yes to all that you are doing. We will all get there. It is acknowledging how we feel and being open to what the universe brings, as it has a habit of taking you to your destination which is unexpectedly where you wanted to be and sometimes to a whole new better place which you never thought of. Thanks for sharing 😊
I so know all these feelings; we have lived in Gloucestershire for 30 years and cannot make a decision one way or the other about moving or staying. We just can’t! The fear of the unknown of course is a biggy! How on earth do you make yourself make a decision?? From a chronically indecisive person!