@@isadoritz ...some businesses say to client here is a catalog if yoéu want to choose a "service" I will loo at it at home? Why, you can do it here now... Its like well, comntent is also important. they dont give you chance to have your own mind.
I walked away from a guy that wanted me to dim my light and now he wants me back and is realizing he now wants to marry me. I've already moved on, not gonna happen!!!!
Did that when relationship was,getting well established, yet certain behaviors on his part didn't resolve as result of changes i made! (We were too young for the level of emotions lol)
Mommy once told me only to date "finished product" men. No such thing as fixing a man. You are not a plumber or a mechanic. One red flag and you must flee, said my mom. Period. I love and like and admire my dad so much, and I want a man who cherish me as my dad cherish my mom, so I guess I'll beter believe in my mom.
No one should waste time on a low effort guy. Showing mixed signals hot n cold not following up all are red flags. The biggest price you pay is not money time and effort. It's your emotions. Please be smart enough to walk away .
I said, “I”m not interested in continuing this relationship.” He asked if we could talk. We met at a restaurant and I brought a list of musts. We’re still together.
8:46 This message is so important for women to learn and deeply internalize. *"He doesn't NOT like you because you asked for what you want. YOU telling him just made it a lot harder for him to string you along."* This is so true & valuable. You never lose being direct & asking for what you want, his no to you is ultimately a No to himself as well.✅
Don't ever place anyone on a pedestal higher than your own self. You do need to express your annoyance and if nothing changes, you need to leave if you value your balance.
I think one of the reasons I pulled away from him and created distance is because I felt emotionally drained from trying to make things work out for us. I fight because I care but when I am really done; I just leave silently 😌
@@Amylynnklh900 I am sorry you are going through that but at the end of the day you just realise that you’d better love and protect yourself first before the pain gets too strong. Hugs 😌😊
@@soyearold Hey that's awesome, and I'm sure you made your grandmother really happy! I wish you and your wife the best. I hope that you have many years of happiness. You know grandmothers can be really funny without tryung to be funny. I can remember my grandmother asking me about I girl I had recently met, this was like 15-20 years ago. What's the first question she asks me about the girl??? Can she cook?? Spoken like a true Italian grannie!!!! I nearly pissed my pants laughing. Oh, and by the way, the girl couldn't cook, needless to say it didn't work out! lol
I needed this.. I told him how I felt, and the only thing he said was Take Care. It hurt initially, but the last 2 minutes of this video helped me realize it was simply his loss. Thank you for making this video.
Yes, I changed from being a golden retriever to a black cat... and he is out now, blocked by me everywhere! I need to detox and detach from him to move on with my love life... I chose me and made myself a priority and I chose to have self respect and I needed him to be out of the picture
Kind and soft hearted women are not to be seen as weak. Empathy is our strength and that makes us human and fulfilled. However you choose to treat this kind of women, once they have enough of your maltreatment, coldness, nonchalant attitude, believe me when they walk away they don't go back and that is self-worth. If you have a genuine intention towards someone, I think it is better you take the right move other than playing games to hurt them and only for you to play the victim. Whatever you give a woman, she multiplies it and give it back to you. Everybody has a limit.
I just told him that I didn’t expect to see him again and that it was nice to meet him. He immediately responded with “I’ve been crazy busy with work, but that isn’t an excuse for inconsistent communication. I hope I can see you again, but I totally understand if you wouldn’t want to” I said “I was making plans and following up on them before, which clearly didn’t work for either of us, so you would have to step into that role. Others in the past have mistaken my generosity for something else and that was a great misapprehension on their part” and he said “I have experienced that as well, and I not only respect, but appreciate your boundaries” so I said “thank you”. I guess we’ll see if he actually means it. I don’t have any particular investment in either outcome anymore though. I think he realises he fumbled me
This is what my current situation is, long story we broke up Now I don’t have time for him The tables has turned🎉 I have him on a string but don’t urgently want or need him. He has realized with the distance how much I mean to him, he won’t tell me but now he is positive and avilable for the little time I have for him. I have once again found myself and what makes me happy.🎉 inner happiness is key, I’m a sigma female I’m afraid he is a co dependent male.
Yes this was truly very helpful, especially the part on how to communicate your standards to a man. I think this is where me and probably other women, get lost a lot of times, as we think a man will understand if we explain him how we feel. But they dont. Because theyre not a woman. But i never knew how to tell a man an expectation and let him be to live up to it.
We love you, Brian! You’re the big brother we all need to help us in our relationships with men. God bless you because you really do an amazing job! 🤗🙏☦️☀️
Well my low effort man didn't react much to me doing my own thing. He was super keen at first and after I started spending more time with him - which is what he said he wanted - he just cruised along with his life and didn't make any effort .... at all. Thank goodness I made the decision to focus on my own progress, looking after my family, working at a job I enjoy and building wealth. Now I can see I was wasting my time, hoping for something that wasn't gonna happen. There is nothing wrong with being single... its way better than struggling to maintain a relationship that doesn't give you what you need.
Love this video! I wasted 11 years with a low-effort guy. He walked away from me straight into a relationship with another woman. It didn't last, he calls me, but I didn't respond at the time. Long story short...he calls a few years later to tell me he has Parkinson's and cancer. Wanted me to visit him (several states away). I wanted to, but work was so busy that I put it off. Time passed and I didn't know he had died. Found out when I called him and the phone was disconnected. I have felt so much guilt and grief that it's been devastating for the past 6 months. I never got closure of our relationship which lasted off and on for 33 years. Now I'm 72 and I feel like I missed the chance to find out many answers about our true feelings for one another. Loved him so much, but at the same time think that if he had felt the same way, he would't have left. Now I'll never know the real reason why he continued to keep in touch. Time ran out for us.
I really feel for you, it must be so hard wondering 'what if'. But you tried your best and as you said, he did leave you and immediately begin a relationship with someone else. It sounds as though he perhaps had an avoidant attachment style (they often move on fast to avoid their feelings). Please don't blame yourself, I'm sure you made decisions in your own best interest, which is very admirable. Believe that you chose the right path, and have that be your internal closure. It's obviously only you who knows the ins- and-outs of your time together, but I'm sure he did love you. I wish we could all have a happy ending with someone. Give love and kindness to yourself, show yourself compassion and don't beat yourself up. I wish you all the best and send you a massive hug. ❤
You are in love with an idea and a wish, instead of who he was and how he actually treated you. A loving man is certain, and doesn’t “need” 11 years of limbo to see how he feels about you. This man wasted your time and now he’s passed and you are STILL wasting your time on an idea of what could have been, instead of seeing him for what he was: a time waster who left, and immediately took the next available warm body as your replacement. What a prize of a man! Get your self-respect and move on! Half of your life has been spent entangled with this lukewarm loser. And now he’s not even lukewarm- he’s cold because he’s dead! He’s taken enough of your time! Not one more minute!
If playing games is the only solution to have him, walk away. I finally met him after a year of Distance situationship. He’s unclear about his intentions on the first date, something was off so i stayed low key, im not chasing until i get my answers.
Something was off because you've never met before, you didn't share body language and energy before and those are make the difference when it comes to someone liking you. Don't lose your time on someone you haven't met in person and went on several dates. Look for those answers within yourself ❤
@@karentrevino6904 we had a second date and it was giving friendly vibes so i couldn’t figure out if he’s being a gentleman or he really didn’t feel chemistry as i did. He asked for a third one before leaving so I’ll clear things out once for all. I think he had enough time to know, i rather know his true feelings than play dumb games and waste more time on an avoidant immature guy.
The thing about when a guy feels things for you…I need help understanding that. Like, when it happens, how it happens, how to recognize when a guy is feeling things (since they don’t verbalize it) and how to elicit more feelings in him. Guys are supposed to be simple, but my experience shows me that they think things in their heads and then surprise you with them later - both good and bad. So, how to know how it all works is what I’m trying to grasp.
You give me faith that somewhere out there, a good man is trying to find me. Thanks. I am learning not to give my time and energy to someone who doesn't give theirs back. And it's ok for me to leave when I don't feel cared about. I also place God into this equation. I believe my God loves me and wants the best man for me, even though I have messed up in this area of my life before. I have truly used your videos today to speak truth to my mind and overpower some pretty destructive emotions. I have to shut down feelings and love myself enough to walk away from pain and confusion. Much gratitude to you.
Today is the first day i came across your video and half way through I liked and subscribed. This is exactly what i needed, thank you very much, I'm from Nigeria 🇳🇬 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🎉🎉
Funny guy, you had me cracking up with your analysis of the seven hundred square feet example.I almost missed out on your very wise advice, some reason I just saw the video, watching your videos gets me very excited about the future.Thanks my imaginary brother.
THANK YOU, thank you, thank you for this. I really needed to hear this right now! Long distance is hard, but I spelt it out last night that I can’t do long distance part-time. It needs to be full-time or nothing because that’s what I deserve. We’ll see what happens next…
Thank you Geert I appreciate you're videos I'm struggling after a few years of things in that mono vibe no dates despite talking about it, not talking about it, asking, not asking, I'm at a loss I admit I have low confidence from being in a domestic violent relationship in my past which makes me a people pleaser the very thing I'm trying to fix, thank you I will try to put you're Great Advice into practice 💙 I love it when you stay to the very end of you're pep talk videos... Hope it's a Fantabulous week.
@@clairexxx0405 I would strongly recommend Terri Cole, she has so many videos that could help you understand so much and break free from your patterns. Keep going !
The manosphere's typical response to all videos talking about this type of thing: "Women only want the top 1% of guys like Chads and Tyrones. There's soooo many great guys in their friend friendzone that would give them a relationship. Instead these women get passed around and used by high value men who dont want them because those guys have lots of options. Then when they are older they begin looking around wondering where all the good guys are at. Stop giving these women any attention. We're the prize, kings." In some ways the low effort man is low effort because he doesn't feel its necessary to step up for you... and he doesn't want to. So that part may be true. On the other hand, since millions of women of all ages seem to be having the same experiences it appears that low effort men are a societal epidemic. They're just not that incentived or motivated to pursue like in decades past. This creates a new generation of women who have grown increasingly frustrated and hopeless towards dating.
The guy I dated didn’t want me but his friend told me “ we match “ and I didn’t know what to say . Originally I liked his friend when I just went on a date with him … but I tried to just focus on him and at the end the friend was the one who always wanted to talk with me INSTEAD of the guy I dated for a few times … I feel so stupid … well I deleted him from social media but not his friend … I won’t date his friend but he is nice and he can be my friend What hurts me the most is that he told me “ my friend wants to talk with you … he probably misses you “ 😢😢😢😢 and yes his friend and I talk more but I just feel so stupid
I think what is failed to understand is when you have loved someone and been in a committed relationship for a number of years sometimes 2-3 years, maybe more for some people, and its been clear what the feelings are and then you come to find out you are being used and manipulated for what you can do for the guy and how amazing you make them feel with all the beautiful incredible love they have coming into their life and this is just some ego boost for them after a while and you realize you are being taken advantage of it makes a person very upset, so just saying this is what I want and then walking away is a very rudimentary impractical unrealistic next step, thats not how it works out, there will be a brutal slaying of emotions that takes place and there is no other way to get out of that process other than walking through it one day at a time.
If a man hasn't proposed by year 2, he doesn't really wanna marry you, or is waiting for someone better to come along. Better to leave after 2 or 3 years, than to prolong it any more. It's not going to get better. Life's lessons sometimes take a while to stick. The best thing I ever did, was walk away from a 4 year relationship! It gave me clarity about red flags, and not making excuses for men. My standards are way higher!
My ex has just returned to me after being with a woman for 5 years, they are engaged she's 23 years younger than me & 13 years younger than him. He back with me because she puts her friends /pre relationship activities before him. He was constantly left at home while she did her 'thing' several nights a week & always felt left out at nights out with her friends as she totally ignored him & he had to make conversation with people he'd never met before or been introduced to. So, for her your ideas definitely didn't work. You're either a couple or your single. You can't expect to live a single life & live as a couple. It will not work. Yes, you need not to give up your own identity. But don't take it too far!
@@susancampbell7335 my same thought. I'm sorry but he seems he doesn't want to be alone. I hope I'm wrong but probably he will leave again 😢 also I wouldn't never take him back.
Beautiful video Brian. I am in a funny spot with someone I just met who seems “low effort.” It gets really confusing on what to do. I want him to step up on his own. Not sure what to do next.
I have recently gracefully let go a guy who thinks he can string me along…I said my peace and goodbyes. No need to be mad about. At least I’m not wasting my time and energy to someone that doesn’t belong to me. He’s blocking the real deal.. 😊
Absolutely perfect what I needed this morning. Told him i want 2 be married, ( Told him this over two years ago while we were dating). Asked what do u see for us? He said be in same city( we dated in our home state, he already had plans to move and I have visited him for a year) and live together for year then be in committed rshp. I said I have standards. I want to be engaged to Live together. And Not necessarily a rush for marriage. I said it's totally up to you, and it's fine, your decision but if this isn't happening, I need to move on and look at my other options. He said, I have been put on notice. Also inspired by another video this morning that asked, are you the comfort girl?Or are you the dream girl
I just found your page and started to watch your video's. I like your video's, but it would be amazing if you can put subtitles to them, not automatic subtitles. Sometimes it is not easy to catch up with your words or sentences.
Omgod....so so so needed this at this time,where im struggling to come out of virtual situationship n no real dating....thnku so much for this video...
Is there a man out there that isn’t a daily drinker, who isn’t in debt, who is taller than 5feet 10, height weight proportional, doesnt have ED, is not a religious fanatic, isn’t emotional stunted and is compassionate? I have been dating for 4 years I’ve been on over 40 dates and have not met one man who has all of these attributes? I have lost hope.
This sounds like entertaining someone who is avoidantly attached. I want to have an open dialogue with my partner. If my partner gets uninterested when I am being open and communicating in the relationship, that's a spot on sign of someone who is avoidant, which many men is. No, I will not play hard to get, to be liked by men.
![Quando Rondo - Life Goes On [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/eIf3fhMXAow/mqdefault.jpg)
‘’Little effort man doesn’t deserve strong emotions’’ omg such a good way of looking at it 🤩
Whew!! ❤❤ 😮this is such a hard trick to learn!!,😂😂
Yes - like that saying. 😂
I’m done wasting my energy on someone that doesn’t want to reciprocate.
I can always tell when people are invested in others by how passionately they respond.
@@isadoritz ...some businesses say to client here is a catalog if yoéu want to choose a "service"
I will loo at it at home?
Why, you can do it here now...
Its like well, comntent is also important.
they dont give you chance to have your own mind.
That’s really good I needed to hear that
I walked away from a guy that wanted me to dim my light and now he wants me back and is realizing he now wants to marry me. I've already moved on, not gonna happen!!!!
Agree. Only desperate people beg and chase. It ain't happening.
Did that when relationship was,getting well established, yet certain behaviors on his part didn't resolve as result of changes i made! (We were too young for the level of emotions lol)
When woman walks away n chances are she will never come back again.
Sounds like he enjoyed the attention
@@sharoncarter6172 definitely, but he thought I'd never leave. Proved him wrong
The true one is effortless. He won't make you cry or fight to keep him.
Mommy once told me only to date "finished product" men. No such thing as fixing a man. You are not a plumber or a mechanic. One red flag and you must flee, said my mom. Period. I love and like and admire my dad so much, and I want a man who cherish me as my dad cherish my mom, so I guess I'll beter believe in my mom.
Great advice from your mama ❤
Your mama is a blessing❤
Your mom is smart
Your mom is VERY wise ❤
Wrong, you need to date young and build everything together. There are not "finished products", you will never find one that wants you. Sorry
No one should waste time on a low effort guy. Showing mixed signals hot n cold not following up all are red flags. The biggest price you pay is not money time and effort. It's your emotions. Please be smart enough to walk away .
I said, “I”m not interested in continuing this relationship.” He asked if we could talk. We met at a restaurant and I brought a list of musts. We’re still together.
did he changed?
Well done you👏😁 in many cases they ghost after that or try to play emotional games to keep giving minimum. Best of luck for the future🍀
Applause 👏 😊
How long were you guys together for before that talk?
@@SarahlovesSerge About 4 months. It’s been almost 3 years now.
8:46 This message is so important for women to learn and deeply internalize.
*"He doesn't NOT like you because you asked for what you want. YOU telling him just made it a lot harder for him to string you along."*
This is so true & valuable.
You never lose being direct & asking for what you want, his no to you is ultimately a No to himself as well.✅
Don't ever place anyone on a pedestal higher than your own self. You do need to express your annoyance and if nothing changes, you need to leave if you value your balance.
Perfect words
I’m looking for a relationship not a situationship. Love that
THIS!!
I think one of the reasons I pulled away from him and created distance is because I felt emotionally drained from trying to make things work out for us.
I fight because I care but when I am really done; I just leave silently 😌
Me too ❤
Same girl. We try our hardest, hurt like hell. Then we take the steps to move on!
@@Amylynnklh900I am sorry you have gone through that but at the end of the day you realise you gotta love and protect yourself first 🥲🥹
@@LeeLee-mn4dv🥹 sending hugs your way. This too shall pass!
@@Amylynnklh900 I am sorry you are going through that but at the end of the day you just realise that you’d better love and protect yourself first before the pain gets too strong. Hugs 😌😊
Low-effort man does not deserve strong emotions! Well said!❤
Never wait or chase the guy. I'm happy married now but it was a long journey. If you have the real deal it's so easy and peaceful ❤
My alone feels so good. I'll have you only if you're sweeter than my solitude ❤
Yep exactly
Bingo!!! 💯💯💯💯
This🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌
❤❤❤ hahaha (I just love that) never heard it quite like that
This! ❤
* * * My Nona always said : Dust settle, not me
❤
You should always listen to your Italian grandmother!
Iconic
@@alspencer3826 And I did it. I married the ONE she liked the most.
@@soyearold Hey that's awesome, and I'm sure you made your grandmother really happy! I wish you and your wife the best. I hope that you have many years of happiness. You know grandmothers can be really funny without tryung to be funny. I can remember my grandmother asking me about I girl I had recently met, this was like 15-20 years ago. What's the first question she asks me about the girl??? Can she cook?? Spoken like a true Italian grannie!!!! I nearly pissed my pants laughing. Oh, and by the way, the girl couldn't cook, needless to say it didn't work out! lol
I needed this.. I told him how I felt, and the only thing he said was Take Care. It hurt initially, but the last 2 minutes of this video helped me realize it was simply his loss. Thank you for making this video.
Lol what a creep
He said I don’t have emotional capacity to take all this 🙃
You missed a bullet, be thankful. You will heal from this. 💐
Yes, I changed from being a golden retriever to a black cat... and he is out now, blocked by me everywhere! I need to detox and detach from him to move on with my love life... I chose me and made myself a priority and I chose to have self respect and I needed him to be out of the picture
❤❤❤
A man Who comes in to stay displays his feelings
Kind and soft hearted women are not to be seen as weak. Empathy is our strength and that makes us human and fulfilled. However you choose to treat this kind of women, once they have enough of your maltreatment, coldness, nonchalant attitude, believe me when they walk away they don't go back and that is self-worth. If you have a genuine intention towards someone, I think it is better you take the right move other than playing games to hurt them and only for you to play the victim. Whatever you give a woman, she multiplies it and give it back to you. Everybody has a limit.
This is the first time that I felt someone understands me more than I understand myself
Just walk away. Waste of time trying to fix a dusty.
Sprinkle sprinkle ✨✨😂😂😂
Dusty mothballs😅
A dusty 😂😂😂
"Here is what I need. Good luck.". I love this!
I absolutely enjoy your videos. The contents really resonate with me. “ Little effort man doesn’t deserve strong emotions “ . I love it .
i guessed thats probably why some high value men are still single, a grown man should know how to pursue the woman he loves n wants a future with her.
I just told him that I didn’t expect to see him again and that it was nice to meet him. He immediately responded with “I’ve been crazy busy with work, but that isn’t an excuse for inconsistent communication. I hope I can see you again, but I totally understand if you wouldn’t want to” I said “I was making plans and following up on them before, which clearly didn’t work for either of us, so you would have to step into that role. Others in the past have mistaken my generosity for something else and that was a great misapprehension on their part” and he said “I have experienced that as well, and I not only respect, but appreciate your boundaries” so I said “thank you”. I guess we’ll see if he actually means it. I don’t have any particular investment in either outcome anymore though. I think he realises he fumbled me
Ok that sounded great … can you give us an update 😊
I also want to know how things went :)
We are wondering how did that all work out? 🙏🏼
Part 2, please?
That was the end of that conversation. Why would you still be wanting that guy to resurface again?
Be authentic. Period
This is what my current situation is, long story we broke up
Now I don’t have time for him
The tables has turned🎉
I have him on a string but don’t urgently want or need him. He has realized with the distance how much I mean to him, he won’t tell me but now he is positive and avilable for the little time I have for him. I have once again found myself and what makes me happy.🎉 inner happiness is key, I’m a sigma female I’m afraid he is a co dependent male.
Yes this was truly very helpful, especially the part on how to communicate your standards to a man. I think this is where me and probably other women, get lost a lot of times, as we think a man will understand if we explain him how we feel. But they dont. Because theyre not a woman. But i never knew how to tell a man an expectation and let him be to live up to it.
So glad this video popped up. I needed to hear this. Thank you Brian
We love you, Brian! You’re the big brother we all need to help us in our relationships with men. God bless you because you really do an amazing job! 🤗🙏☦️☀️
It's better to realize it and cut it off, and find another guy the faster the better.
Love your hair!
Thanks Brian for this advice. Not giving a man the spot that is not right for him.
And when we’re done waiting, there’s no going back!
He's taking a spot that doesn't belong to him! 👏👏Very true
Well my low effort man didn't react much to me doing my own thing. He was super keen at first and after I started spending more time with him - which is what he said he wanted - he just cruised along with his life and didn't make any effort .... at all. Thank goodness I made the decision to focus on my own progress, looking after my family, working at a job I enjoy and building wealth. Now I can see I was wasting my time, hoping for something that wasn't gonna happen. There is nothing wrong with being single... its way better than struggling to maintain a relationship that doesn't give you what you need.
Love this video! I wasted 11 years with a low-effort guy. He walked away from me straight into a relationship with another woman. It didn't last, he calls me, but I didn't respond at the time. Long story short...he calls a few years later to tell me he has Parkinson's and cancer. Wanted me to visit him (several states away). I wanted to, but work was so busy that I put it off. Time passed and I didn't know he had died. Found out when I called him and the phone was disconnected. I have felt so much guilt and grief that it's been devastating for the past 6 months. I never got closure of our relationship which lasted off and on for 33 years. Now I'm 72 and I feel like I missed the chance to find out many answers about our true feelings for one another. Loved him so much, but at the same time think that if he had felt the same way, he would't have left. Now I'll never know the real reason why he continued to keep in touch. Time ran out for us.
I really feel for you, it must be so hard wondering 'what if'. But you tried your best and as you said, he did leave you and immediately begin a relationship with someone else. It sounds as though he perhaps had an avoidant attachment style (they often move on fast to avoid their feelings).
Please don't blame yourself, I'm sure you made decisions in your own best interest, which is very admirable. Believe that you chose the right path, and have that be your internal closure. It's obviously only you who knows the ins- and-outs of your time together, but I'm sure he did love you. I wish we could all have a happy ending with someone. Give love and kindness to yourself, show yourself compassion and don't beat yourself up. I wish you all the best and send you a massive hug. ❤
@@helenlockwood1354what a kind person you are Helen, sending that message to a stranger. 🌟Sending you all best wishes.
You are in love with an idea and a wish, instead of who he was and how he actually treated you. A loving man is certain, and doesn’t “need” 11 years of limbo to see how he feels about you. This man wasted your time and now he’s passed and you are STILL wasting your time on an idea of what could have been, instead of seeing him for what he was: a time waster who left, and immediately took the next available warm body as your replacement. What a prize of a man!
Get your self-respect and move on! Half of your life has been spent entangled with this lukewarm loser. And now he’s not even lukewarm- he’s cold because he’s dead! He’s taken enough of your time! Not one more minute!
This guy just speaks exactly what I'm going through
If playing games is the only solution to have him, walk away.
I finally met him after a year of Distance situationship. He’s unclear about his intentions on the first date, something was off so i stayed low key, im not chasing until i get my answers.
Something was off because you've never met before, you didn't share body language and energy before and those are make the difference when it comes to someone liking you. Don't lose your time on someone you haven't met in person and went on several dates. Look for those answers within yourself ❤
@@karentrevino6904 we had a second date and it was giving friendly vibes so i couldn’t figure out if he’s being a gentleman or he really didn’t feel chemistry as i did. He asked for a third one before leaving so I’ll clear things out once for all.
I think he had enough time to know, i rather know his true feelings than play dumb games and waste more time on an avoidant immature guy.
Its hard to go test driving. Im afraid to get my heart hurt if it doesn't work out. There is one man i want but he's taking forever. 😔
❤
Go and play up send him a video
This was a mature,valuable and healthy advise. I wish this will reach more women!
The thing about when a guy feels things for you…I need help understanding that. Like, when it happens, how it happens, how to recognize when a guy is feeling things (since they don’t verbalize it) and how to elicit more feelings in him. Guys are supposed to be simple, but my experience shows me that they think things in their heads and then surprise you with them later - both good and bad. So, how to know how it all works is what I’m trying to grasp.
Oh, my case 😢
I needed this. Moving on but it took a long time.❤
Me too, sis. We're getting there 🙏
You give me faith that somewhere out there, a good man is trying to find me. Thanks. I am learning not to give my time and energy to someone who doesn't give theirs back. And it's ok for me to leave when I don't feel cared about. I also place God into this equation. I believe my God loves me and wants the best man for me, even though I have messed up in this area of my life before. I have truly used your videos today to speak truth to my mind and overpower some pretty destructive emotions. I have to shut down feelings and love myself enough to walk away from pain and confusion. Much gratitude to you.
Sadly for you, there's no god, you'll have to be proactive and find that man yourself...there's no magic wand to make him appear
Today is the first day i came across your video and half way through I liked and subscribed. This is exactly what i needed, thank you very much, I'm from Nigeria 🇳🇬 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🎉🎉
God bless you....this was bliss, just at the right time 😢❤
Low effort is so perfect a description.
The power house guy is like night and day.
Why didn't I know before! ? I grew up not learning a bit about relationships, and I ended up being broke hearted many times
Same here @yarahejaz1687! I didn't start learning about relationships until I was in my late 30s :(
@@yarahejaz1687 Everyone gets heartbroken unless they don't allow themselves to fall in love. You live and learn :)
Thank you, Brian. I needed this. ❤
Perfect Brian, thank you so much, I always stay to the end of your insightful,helpful video's, love Donna from Sydney Australia 😇
Funny guy, you had me cracking up with your analysis of the seven hundred square feet example.I almost missed out on your very wise advice, some reason I just saw the video, watching your videos gets me very excited about the future.Thanks my imaginary brother.
Spot on, as always!!
Love you Brian, so true what you are trying to teach women and men….thank you!!
Thank you!!! From the bottom of my heart ❤❤❤
This was, hands down
The BEST video you have ever made
Ever
And that's saying something 😊
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
THANK YOU, thank you, thank you for this. I really needed to hear this right now! Long distance is hard, but I spelt it out last night that I can’t do long distance part-time. It needs to be full-time or nothing because that’s what I deserve. We’ll see what happens next…
5:28 this is what I needed to hear :) thank you so much
I needed to hear this today! Thank you 🙏🏼
Thank you Geert I appreciate you're videos I'm struggling after a few years of things in that mono vibe no dates despite talking about it, not talking about it, asking, not asking, I'm at a loss I admit I have low confidence from being in a domestic violent relationship in my past which makes me a people pleaser the very thing I'm trying to fix, thank you I will try to put you're Great Advice into practice 💙
I love it when you stay to the very end of you're pep talk videos... Hope it's a Fantabulous week.
@@clairexxx0405 I would strongly recommend Terri Cole, she has so many videos that could help you understand so much and break free from your patterns. Keep going !
i love watching your videos 🤍
another great one, THANK YOU
The manosphere's typical response to all videos talking about this type of thing: "Women only want the top 1% of guys like Chads and Tyrones. There's soooo many great guys in their friend friendzone that would give them a relationship. Instead these women get passed around and used by high value men who dont want them because those guys have lots of options. Then when they are older they begin looking around wondering where all the good guys are at. Stop giving these women any attention. We're the prize, kings."
In some ways the low effort man is low effort because he doesn't feel its necessary to step up for you... and he doesn't want to. So that part may be true. On the other hand, since millions of women of all ages seem to be having the same experiences it appears that low effort men are a societal epidemic. They're just not that incentived or motivated to pursue like in decades past. This creates a new generation of women who have grown increasingly frustrated and hopeless towards dating.
I really enjoy your humor 😂. You are so entertaining. Great common sense advices on dealing with men.
'let's say he sees you going away...' He did see me going away. Forever ;)
Yes this makes a lot of sense. I think I now know what I need to do. Thank you
brian you are the best thank you
Bravo 👏🏾 Thank you Brian!
Brian, you are one of the best guys on RUclips for relationship advice!!
Thank you!
The guy I dated didn’t want me but his friend told me “ we match “ and I didn’t know what to say . Originally I liked his friend when I just went on a date with him … but I tried to just focus on him and at the end the friend was the one who always wanted to talk with me INSTEAD of the guy I dated for a few times …
I feel so stupid … well I deleted him from social media but not his friend … I won’t date his friend but he is nice and he can be my friend
What hurts me the most is that he told me “ my friend wants to talk with you … he probably misses you “ 😢😢😢😢 and yes his friend and I talk more but I just feel so stupid
DATE. THE. FRIEND.
YES. At least the first part about "I thought I wanted one, but...." LOL
I think what is failed to understand is when you have loved someone and been in a committed relationship for a number of years sometimes 2-3 years, maybe more for some people, and its been clear what the feelings are and then you come to find out you are being used and manipulated for what you can do for the guy and how amazing you make them feel with all the beautiful incredible love they have coming into their life and this is just some ego boost for them after a while and you realize you are being taken advantage of it makes a person very upset, so just saying this is what I want and then walking away is a very rudimentary impractical unrealistic next step, thats not how it works out, there will be a brutal slaying of emotions that takes place and there is no other way to get out of that process other than walking through it one day at a time.
It’s not y’all just scared. Stop prolonging the inevitable and walk away it’s simple
If a man hasn't proposed by year 2, he doesn't really wanna marry you, or is waiting for someone better to come along. Better to leave after 2 or 3 years, than to prolong it any more. It's not going to get better. Life's lessons sometimes take a while to stick. The best thing I ever did, was walk away from a 4 year relationship! It gave me clarity about red flags, and not making excuses for men. My standards are way higher!
5:20 I needed to hear this
"Test driving"? Yeah, no.
PERFECTION. 🔥🔥🔥
His triggers seem key to many things. Some men have too many past triggers that may never be deactivated.
Wow. This was really helpful and delivered in such a caring way.
My ex has just returned to me after being with a woman for 5 years, they are engaged she's 23 years younger than me & 13 years younger than him. He back with me because she puts her friends /pre relationship activities before him.
He was constantly left at home while she did her 'thing' several nights a week & always felt left out at nights out with her friends as she totally ignored him & he had to make conversation with people he'd never met before or been introduced to.
So, for her your ideas definitely didn't work.
You're either a couple or your single. You can't expect to live a single life & live as a couple. It will not work. Yes, you need not to give up your own identity. But don't take it too far!
He wasnt the right person for her.
You let him come back???😮
@@susancampbell7335 my same thought. I'm sorry but he seems he doesn't want to be alone. I hope I'm wrong but probably he will leave again 😢 also I wouldn't never take him back.
Hopefully you sending that man right back where he came from 😂
Good for that other woman, learn from her she’s living her life
@@susancampbell7335 Same surprise here, why are you taking the man back ?!
Amazing. One of your best talks. God bless.
Beautiful video Brian. I am in a funny spot with someone I just met who seems “low effort.” It gets really confusing on what to do. I want him to step up on his own. Not sure what to do next.
Excellent!
Thank you Brian!!! I needed to hear this
Thank you so much!😊
You are such an amazing person. I love watching your videos. Wish I could have watched it earlier ❤
What is the difference between a narc and an avoidant when they come back? What sentence/ do they use?
Wow I wasn't sure of watching it till end but I'm glad that I did❤ Thanks it gave me confidence
Thank you for the words❤
I can listen to your wonderful advice all day long, thank you so much
I have recently gracefully let go a guy who thinks he can string me along…I said my peace and goodbyes. No need to be mad about. At least I’m not wasting my time and energy to someone that doesn’t belong to me. He’s blocking the real deal.. 😊
Absolutely perfect what I needed this morning. Told him i want 2 be married, ( Told him this over two years ago while we were dating). Asked what do u see for us? He said be in same city( we dated in our home state, he already had plans to move and I have visited him for a year) and live together for year then be in committed rshp. I said I have standards. I want to be engaged to Live together. And Not necessarily a rush for marriage. I said it's totally up to you, and it's fine, your decision but if this isn't happening, I need to move on and look at my other options. He said, I have been put on notice. Also inspired by another video this morning that asked, are you the comfort girl?Or are you the dream girl
This is actually really good dating advice! Following for more! ☺️
What if he’s just clueless and has no idea how to treat a good woman??
Great video Brian!
Thank you so much for this
Love it Brian!!! ❤
I just found your page and started to watch your video's. I like your video's, but it would be amazing if you can put subtitles to them, not automatic subtitles. Sometimes it is not easy to catch up with your words or sentences.
His therapist or mother?! 🤢😢🤮😢
While he enjoys life.I long for freedom, and the peace of God.
3 1/2 years never held hands or kissed I said I was moving on there is no future. He said "There is definitely no chance now"😂😂😂
Omgod....so so so needed this at this time,where im struggling to come out of virtual situationship n no real dating....thnku so much for this video...
Urgh I could be a pro coach at this point. But retiring now thank you v much 🙌🏾
Is there a man out there that isn’t a daily drinker, who isn’t in debt, who is taller than 5feet 10, height weight proportional, doesnt have ED, is not a religious fanatic, isn’t emotional stunted and is compassionate? I have been dating for 4 years I’ve been on over 40 dates and have not met one man who has all of these attributes? I have lost hope.
Unfortunately my SO gives zero effort now. It's just draining.
I so love you Brian.....you are so right. ❤
This sounds like entertaining someone who is avoidantly attached. I want to have an open dialogue with my partner. If my partner gets uninterested when I am being open and communicating in the relationship, that's a spot on sign of someone who is avoidant, which many men is. No, I will not play hard to get, to be liked by men.
Thank you so much, I needed to hear this 🥺