Cobra effect kicks in. Everyone in Gotham becomes a criminal with each attempting to one up the last. Joker laughs as Bruce does what he's been trying to achieve this entire time.
Then some dude in a yellow first responders jacket with something printed in blue on the back shows up at absurd speeds talking about some Japanese megacorporation. Saw him blow a dudes brains out before he could blink. Shits fucked.
So right! Legitimately if Batman wanted to dismantle crime he could literally just buy all of the criminals off. Buy off all the politicians. Get some real laws passed in Gotham. Bribe the police to do their job.
The problem is that unfortunately that wouldn’t work. The real enemy in gotham is mental illness and greed. Then they’d just threaten Bruce whenever criminals just want money-it would never be enough and Bruce would be rewarding bad behavior which would just turn the rest of tge gothamites scummy.
@@HACKER-ct6hd the threat could be: Do your actual job or have your past crimes exposed? For some people that's an easy choice, they will do their jobs to keep their current lives intact with minimal levels of corruption. This is Gotham City, the crime rate is probably more than 70% of the population, Gotham is a city of 10 million people according to the current 2022 lore. Everybody's got a skeleton in their closet. Everyone has secrets they don't want exposed. Batman could find those secrets and then use them against people to keep them in line. If not, money sweetens the mouths and greases the wheel. Bribery, plain and simple. 4 million to your campaign, an extra 2 million in your back pocket bank account in the Swiss Alps. All you have to do as a criminal working in a high position of power is: pass the laws that he wants, vote for laws he's in favor of... and you won't get your shit kicked in or your teeth punched out or your child pronography charge exposed to your co-workers and voters. Even with a fake identity and a change of name Batman can find you with just a bit of DNA. The thing is, I actually trust Batman not to act crazy with this because he still has to act within the boundaries of the Constitution as none of the laws he creates can violate it. Laws would still have to be checked by people not underneath his control. The average thug really doesn't matter. Unless the systemic issues at Gotham's core are fixed the city will continue to spiral into hell. Mainly the corruption that needs to be pulled out from its roots.
No open a gym name it training to be better than Batman once a month no gear just a cowl no cape king of the ring type event you beat Batman you can wear the cowl for a day and get 100k and bragging rights
That takes care of financial crimes. But what about those who do it out of boredom, pleasure or laziness? I doubt Poison Ivy, killer Croc or even Catwoman would stop doing crime for money. There are still people to punch for Bruce. Only fewer
Ivy can be placated by Buying out politicians to pass actual laws for toxic disposal and Environmedntal prtotection. If she was in charge of gotham park and tgge city went less jack the riper era industrial hellhole, ther city ccould actually go green. Noteshe is one of the villians batman will turn to, trust, and work with. Catwoman is ..weird. She has her heist thrill seeking, then she has her stealing from scumvags side l, then her avatar of bast sub plot. More of a antihero then a villain. Bat man even lets her rehome artifacts ocassionally. Croc is Croc, i'm not deep on his lore. 90% he could get bought off, to go elsewhere eesp as a bbounty hunter?
Doesn’t catwoman primarily steal gems so if she could buy them what exactly would be her reason to commit crimes. You are right about killer croc and poison ivy with financial income, but now that I think about couldn’t Batman start funding research to cure to killer croc condition. I mean isn’t that something similar to the lizard Spider-Man fights in one of the older Spider-Man movies, of course with that it was more of a mutation caused by a serum and the cure already existed before he even transformed if i remember correctly.
@@Seeyou45The league of assassins figured the only way to cure Gotham was to completely burn it down, but seeing crime rate plummet so drastically they would basically go into remission, until crime starts rising to crazy levels again. The religion nutcase deacon blackfire who sacrifices people in the name of “the lord” just need to be in a fully padded room with no way to contact the outside world or talk with food every now and then, because he just is a normal person who preys on people religion usually Christian to gain control, power, and access to other things. So in other words he’s like a priest that uses his followers to commits crimes or in other words like a cult leader of a cult. You take away deacon blackfire brainwashed people, his ability to influence others and he is completely neutralized.
@@intelligentfool9024 No, she steals cat stuff, Selene is comparably rich to bruce, more so then Cobblepot. She does it for thrills, sometimes to return stolen goods to proper ownership. She would steal a cat statue from britan while it's in gotham to return it to egypt.
For everyone but the insane arch villains like joker... yes, yes it is. there's only a handful of people who commit crime for something other then money in batman. and without henchmen it would nigh impossible to get anything done criminally speaking except save for maybe a metahuman like poison ivy. the rest need organizations and systems to achieve their crime without powers. And Ivy can be easily placated by bruce buying her a massive forest preserve and telling her "make it your own garden of eden, your realm your rules." Shed never leave again.
@@Phoenixesper1depends on how’s she’s being written but she might actually do that if Bruce offered it to her because at least then she can potentially make some new plants that can fix pollution her own way at minimum
Like, imagine Batman as being the real villain, keeping the whole city in this cycle of chaos just so that he can LARP as a superhero. Like, not even doing this for public adoration, just for his own amusement, regardless of how popular or unpopular Batman becomes. The moment he's too old to do it anymore, he immediately does what he could have done the whole time, and fixes everything because he has had his fun.
Bruce: Riddler, I will give you a salary of 3k a week to give me one riddle per week. If you manage to stump me, I’ll grant you whatever you desire. Statue of you on the moon done, invitation to fortress of solitude, street names rearranged in a way that saw Batman is a poopie head, whatever.
@@GipsyDangerfan Riddler doesn't know what the fortress of solitude looks like, Batman could take him to the batcave and call it the fortress of solitude, or something similar.
Dent I can see being fixed a with plastic surgery a guide dog to help with his mental state because if he gets a bit to mad big bad Harv comes out and a therapist who can help him get past his trauma which intern can help heal his head plus lawyer for his friend Bruce he’d definitely do that for clayface he can probably be given his own studio to see what films he can produce by himself which every film Bruce has to watch or have his kids watch it if it’s a kids movie and any critiques he takes seriously after some therapy
He can pay some of the old criminals to pretend to still be doing heinous crimes with no benefit and make it look like a miserable existence so most people see it as a crapshoot
"Gotam 2024, Bruce Wayne pay the criminals to stop doing crime, it seem a good idea, with the best of intentions, what could possibly go wrong?" "Well it turns out that paying people to stop doing crime.. make people want to do crime! Crazy uh? Also the survivors of the families killed by both the old and new criminals were not very happy about the situation, and stormed the Wayne enterprises, just like some nobles on July 14, 1789 in Paris, bruce Wayne lost the Head"
"Paying off criminals has been the greatest decision of my life, there's so much crime now that I'm pun___ goons non-stop! I'm so busy pun___ goons now that I don't have any time anymore to be haunted by my parents' tragedy anymore!" (seriously RUclips? Not allowing the pun___ word? What??? My post kept disappearing until I changed that)
Outside the joke, it's the issue with Wayne fortune getting so ludicrously large over the years. It made more sense when Bruce was just a wealthy socialite and industrialist, now he's a one man political block that can casually shake the whole countries if he wanted to.
I have a theory that while Bruce is aware he could buy off the crime, he does the punching as a sort of catharsis for being unable to protect his parents by beating up the goon that shot them.
Honestly this makes me want to see an AU where instead become batman Bruce Wayne goes into organized crime and try to change gotham to change gotham from the ground up instead from the top down.
honestly curise what Passions Ra's al Ghul, 2 Face, Scarcrow, Riddler, Posion Ivy, Dollmaker, Court of Owls and other Villains have in Wayne Enterprises, we all know Catwoman is Trophy wife
The financial crimes are THE crimes that make Gotham a problem. Mr Freeze needs money for his research to save his wife. Give him a lab and resources, and he will do 0 criminal activity and also produce some nice patents for advanced tech. Ivy is an eco terrorist because the environmental damage and pollution of the factories. Give her the job to check the state of these factories and to develop strategies to reduce pollution. Improving a factory will always release less toxins than make it explode. Catwoman is just a thief who wants the thrill of the adventures. Assume her as counter espionage agent to go in incognito against other factories. Clayface wanted to be a stellar actor ... assume him as leader of a show and help him to control his powers with tech. Two-faces ... just pay a good surgery. His condition is not so bad. Penguin just want money. Harley can be a good psychologist. She just need a bit of stability. And do you know what gives stability? A good job with a good pay and benefits. And so on... Bruce Wayne could save Gotham better than Batman, if he wanted.
"There's no such thing as a good billionaire!" Bruce Wayne: *chucks 20 billion at Tesla just to fuck with Elon Musk's head after he tweets something allegedly derogatory against Batman on Twitter.*
This has been done many times in the comics, and even a few times in the batman tas series. It never sticks. Batman's rogues are a bunch of mentally ill monsters who shun accountability and sustain themselves on chaos. Scarface probably came the closest to being totally reformed when Bruce gave him a job as a mail clerk. But here's a scary thought, of all the unassimilated military age illegal immigrants currently cashing in $4,000 a month in e.b.t. programs who already cause issues by way of gang affiliation, differing cultural perspectives on morality and societal norms, or having been pipelined right out of prisons from other countries, how many do you think are one missed government paycheck away from becoming villains in their own right? Tax dollars for war, not assimilation under american philosophy, or even hurricane relief. Fun stuff to think about.
The actual curse is different and the reasons for it are also different in just about every version of Batman, but if I remember correctly one of them was a ritual sacrifice to a demon that was stopped halfway when one of the cultists grew a spine and stood up against their leader, saving the sacrifice from dying but now the power of the demon takes effect upon all of Gatham, the weaker the mind the more effect it has
I'm begging you use RVC instead of text to speech you can get so much better performances if you let it use your voice to get the inflections if you're going to use AI use the best tool there is
"There is no punchline without the punching," - Batman, probably.
Cobra effect kicks in. Everyone in Gotham becomes a criminal with each attempting to one up the last. Joker laughs as Bruce does what he's been trying to achieve this entire time.
Then some dude in a yellow first responders jacket with something printed in blue on the back shows up at absurd speeds talking about some Japanese megacorporation. Saw him blow a dudes brains out before he could blink. Shits fucked.
@raidenjanes2304 my favorite type of speedster
(And yes I do get the reference)
That penguin bit is so spot on to the character.
"Its not the same without the punching."
"Well... there's always metropolis..."
Batmans eyes widen. "Gotta go!"
But then he could buy Luthor corp
Fun fact: Bruce Wayne offers every villain a job at Wayne Enterprises when they get released from Arkham Asylum. It usually doesnt work.
For some people it's not about the money.
@@patrickginther8527he needs to buy VIP meta tickets
So right! Legitimately if Batman wanted to dismantle crime he could literally just buy all of the criminals off. Buy off all the politicians. Get some real laws passed in Gotham. Bribe the police to do their job.
The problem is that unfortunately that wouldn’t work. The real enemy in gotham is mental illness and greed. Then they’d just threaten Bruce whenever criminals just want money-it would never be enough and Bruce would be rewarding bad behavior which would just turn the rest of tge gothamites scummy.
What about poisen ivy she is an acho terorist with superpowers superpowers
unfortunately or rather fortunately that's not how reality works
@@HACKER-ct6hd the threat could be: Do your actual job or have your past crimes exposed? For some people that's an easy choice, they will do their jobs to keep their current lives intact with minimal levels of corruption.
This is Gotham City, the crime rate is probably more than 70% of the population, Gotham is a city of 10 million people according to the current 2022 lore. Everybody's got a skeleton in their closet. Everyone has secrets they don't want exposed. Batman could find those secrets and then use them against people to keep them in line. If not, money sweetens the mouths and greases the wheel. Bribery, plain and simple. 4 million to your campaign, an extra 2 million in your back pocket bank account in the Swiss Alps.
All you have to do as a criminal working in a high position of power is: pass the laws that he wants, vote for laws he's in favor of... and you won't get your shit kicked in or your teeth punched out or your child pronography charge exposed to your co-workers and voters. Even with a fake identity and a change of name Batman can find you with just a bit of DNA.
The thing is, I actually trust Batman not to act crazy with this because he still has to act within the boundaries of the Constitution as none of the laws he creates can violate it. Laws would still have to be checked by people not underneath his control.
The average thug really doesn't matter. Unless the systemic issues at Gotham's core are fixed the city will continue to spiral into hell. Mainly the corruption that needs to be pulled out from its roots.
@@HACKER-ct6hd good thing this is a show/comic book then
Bruce: “It’s not the same without the punching.“
Me: “So, get a punching bag!“
No open a gym name it training to be better than Batman once a month no gear just a cowl no cape king of the ring type event you beat Batman you can wear the cowl for a day and get 100k and bragging rights
Isn't Penguin hates entire Wayne family though?
And I hatred my last two bosses but still worked for them
50 million dollar sign on bonus
Sure but what Penguin care more about; personal grudges or a big, honking stack of money?
@badbloodkiller3471 I wish I could say the latter, but while practical, the penguin's petty enough to refuse.
Have you seen what 50 million dollars looks like it one place?
That takes care of financial crimes. But what about those who do it out of boredom, pleasure or laziness?
I doubt Poison Ivy, killer Croc or even Catwoman would stop doing crime for money. There are still people to punch for Bruce. Only fewer
There also the political extremist Ras who is actually richer then Brunce. Oh, and that weird religious cult guy that everyone forgets exists.
Ivy can be placated by Buying out politicians to pass actual laws for toxic disposal and Environmedntal prtotection. If she was in charge of gotham park and tgge city went less jack the riper era industrial hellhole, ther city ccould actually go green. Noteshe is one of the villians batman will turn to, trust, and work with.
Catwoman is ..weird. She has her heist thrill seeking, then she has her stealing from scumvags side l, then her avatar of bast sub plot. More of a antihero then a villain. Bat man even lets her rehome artifacts ocassionally.
Croc is Croc, i'm not deep on his lore. 90% he could get bought off, to go elsewhere eesp as a bbounty hunter?
Doesn’t catwoman primarily steal gems so if she could buy them what exactly would be her reason to commit crimes. You are right about killer croc and poison ivy with financial income, but now that I think about couldn’t Batman start funding research to cure to killer croc condition. I mean isn’t that something similar to the lizard Spider-Man fights in one of the older Spider-Man movies, of course with that it was more of a mutation caused by a serum and the cure already existed before he even transformed if i remember correctly.
@@Seeyou45The league of assassins figured the only way to cure Gotham was to completely burn it down, but seeing crime rate plummet so drastically they would basically go into remission, until crime starts rising to crazy levels again. The religion nutcase deacon blackfire who sacrifices people in the name of “the lord” just need to be in a fully padded room with no way to contact the outside world or talk with food every now and then, because he just is a normal person who preys on people religion usually Christian to gain control, power, and access to other things. So in other words he’s like a priest that uses his followers to commits crimes or in other words like a cult leader of a cult. You take away deacon blackfire brainwashed people, his ability to influence others and he is completely neutralized.
@@intelligentfool9024 No, she steals cat stuff, Selene is comparably rich to bruce, more so then Cobblepot. She does it for thrills, sometimes to return stolen goods to proper ownership. She would steal a cat statue from britan while it's in gotham to return it to egypt.
Didn't he do this in a Justice League episode? Paid someone double to betray Luthor?
Yup ultra humanite
thing is, most of batman's criminals don't want money, they want revenge; stated across many episodes and movies
Yes he did. It was the smart ape. I cant remember his name.
@@temwananinkana3419 ultra humanité
@@iuer4643 okay but most of the nameless crooks ARE in it for the money, though
This assumes that crime is exclusivley committed to earn money.
For everyone but the insane arch villains like joker... yes, yes it is. there's only a handful of people who commit crime for something other then money in batman. and without henchmen it would nigh impossible to get anything done criminally speaking except save for maybe a metahuman like poison ivy. the rest need organizations and systems to achieve their crime without powers. And Ivy can be easily placated by bruce buying her a massive forest preserve and telling her "make it your own garden of eden, your realm your rules." Shed never leave again.
@@Phoenixesper1depends on how’s she’s being written but she might actually do that if Bruce offered it to her because at least then she can potentially make some new plants that can fix pollution her own way at minimum
@@levievil9220 Exactly.
@@Phoenixesper1 school shooters dont murder for money. Rapists dont rape for money.
Like, imagine Batman as being the real villain, keeping the whole city in this cycle of chaos just so that he can LARP as a superhero.
Like, not even doing this for public adoration, just for his own amusement, regardless of how popular or unpopular Batman becomes.
The moment he's too old to do it anymore, he immediately does what he could have done the whole time, and fixes everything because he has had his fun.
He could pull a Ras and jump into a Lazarus Pit.
Lore of Billionaire Bruce Wayne Buys Out Crime in Gotham momentum 100
Next week Batman starts fight club
As an unlicensed German doctor once said, "Ze healing is not as rewarding as ze hurting."
No no, he’s got a point. Every good joke needs a punchline
Guess the world’s greatest detective didn’t though of that
The Kevin Conroy impression is spot on. The Joker not so much...
Funny, but fools that don't read comics are going to take this too seriously.
Yeah, everyone knows most Gotham villains have a personal vendetta against Bruce Wayne. Doesn't make this less funny. The AI voice acting does that
@takatotakasui8307 yep. AI will never replace the late great Kevin Conroy.
Goons can be paid off, but not most of his rogues gallery. Like Riddler can't be bribed into not commiting crimes.
Bruce: Riddler, I will give you a salary of 3k a week to give me one riddle per week. If you manage to stump me, I’ll grant you whatever you desire. Statue of you on the moon done, invitation to fortress of solitude, street names rearranged in a way that saw Batman is a poopie head, whatever.
@@GipsyDangerfan Riddler doesn't know what the fortress of solitude looks like, Batman could take him to the batcave and call it the fortress of solitude, or something similar.
Dent I can see being fixed a with plastic surgery a guide dog to help with his mental state because if he gets a bit to mad big bad Harv comes out and a therapist who can help him get past his trauma which intern can help heal his head plus lawyer for his friend Bruce he’d definitely do that for clayface he can probably be given his own studio to see what films he can produce by himself which every film Bruce has to watch or have his kids watch it if it’s a kids movie and any critiques he takes seriously after some therapy
no this is a dream alfred calls him master bruce i bet its mad hatter's dream machine again
If he missed the punching he can just hire Bane as a sparring partner.
Why is no one watching this. This is awesome
Despite the AI art n voices, the joke itself was good 😂
"To work for ... private equity ... It's a little scummier, than what I'm used to doing"
This doesn’t hit like you think it hits.
This is... AWESOME!
Funny how giving people jobs with stable and adequate income eliminates desperation.
But if everybody hears that Batman is paying criminals to not be criminals, wouldn’t honest people start becoming criminals to get better paying jobs?
Eh. If he pays them to stay out of trouble. That’s capitalism done right.
That’s literally how of all of west Texas and Tennessee operates.
He can pay some of the old criminals to pretend to still be doing heinous crimes with no benefit and make it look like a miserable existence so most people see it as a crapshoot
This would just encourage criminals to get big enough to ransom Bruce into paying them off.
"Gotam 2024, Bruce Wayne pay the criminals to stop doing crime, it seem a good idea, with the best of intentions, what could possibly go wrong?"
"Well it turns out that paying people to stop doing crime.. make people want to do crime! Crazy uh?
Also the survivors of the families killed by both the old and new criminals were not very happy about the situation, and stormed the Wayne enterprises, just like some nobles on July 14, 1789 in Paris, bruce Wayne lost the Head"
Oh come on ,bruce would just blow up the house,it costs only a measly billion after all😅
"Paying off criminals has been the greatest decision of my life, there's so much crime now that I'm pun___ goons non-stop! I'm so busy pun___ goons now that I don't have any time anymore to be haunted by my parents' tragedy anymore!"
(seriously RUclips? Not allowing the pun___ word? What??? My post kept disappearing until I changed that)
@@_Vengeance_yeah it is quite annoying
Outside the joke, it's the issue with Wayne fortune getting so ludicrously large over the years. It made more sense when Bruce was just a wealthy socialite and industrialist, now he's a one man political block that can casually shake the whole countries if he wanted to.
I have a theory that while Bruce is aware he could buy off the crime, he does the punching as a sort of catharsis for being unable to protect his parents by beating up the goon that shot them.
He bought out all the crime in the city? So he's green hornet now?
Honestly this makes me want to see an AU where instead become batman Bruce Wayne goes into organized crime and try to change gotham to change gotham from the ground up instead from the top down.
honestly curise what Passions Ra's al Ghul, 2 Face, Scarcrow, Riddler, Posion Ivy, Dollmaker, Court of Owls and other Villains have in Wayne Enterprises, we all know Catwoman is Trophy wife
Man this is great.
But that would not fix the crazy people
Why is Alfred American?
Wooden AI
Great, I'll just pretend to get a criminal until i get a million dollar paycheck from Bruce Wayne
Bro this is what I’ve been saying forever now. Batman is just more fun
The financial crimes are THE crimes that make Gotham a problem.
Mr Freeze needs money for his research to save his wife. Give him a lab and resources, and he will do 0 criminal activity and also produce some nice patents for advanced tech.
Ivy is an eco terrorist because the environmental damage and pollution of the factories. Give her the job to check the state of these factories and to develop strategies to reduce pollution. Improving a factory will always release less toxins than make it explode.
Catwoman is just a thief who wants the thrill of the adventures. Assume her as counter espionage agent to go in incognito against other factories.
Clayface wanted to be a stellar actor ... assume him as leader of a show and help him to control his powers with tech.
Two-faces ... just pay a good surgery. His condition is not so bad.
Penguin just want money.
Harley can be a good psychologist. She just need a bit of stability. And do you know what gives stability? A good job with a good pay and benefits.
And so on...
Bruce Wayne could save Gotham better than Batman, if he wanted.
"There's no such thing as a good billionaire!"
Bruce Wayne: *chucks 20 billion at Tesla just to fuck with Elon Musk's head after he tweets something allegedly derogatory against Batman on Twitter.*
This has been done many times in the comics, and even a few times in the batman tas series.
It never sticks. Batman's rogues are a bunch of mentally ill monsters who shun accountability and sustain themselves on chaos.
Scarface probably came the closest to being totally reformed when Bruce gave him a job as a mail clerk.
But here's a scary thought, of all the unassimilated military age illegal immigrants currently cashing in $4,000 a month in e.b.t. programs who already cause issues by way of gang affiliation, differing cultural perspectives on morality and societal norms, or having been pipelined right out of prisons from other countries, how many do you think are one missed government paycheck away from becoming villains in their own right? Tax dollars for war, not assimilation under american philosophy, or even hurricane relief. Fun stuff to think about.
Nice video!! I thought this was UndeadHumor for a second. Really funny. Subscribed as well.
Another AI channel, thrilling
Bestest! Don't know why I didn't watch it earlier.
So in a comment I read, suposedly the reason Gotham has so much crime is because it's cursed. Would anybody be willing to inform me what fcking curse?
The actual curse is different and the reasons for it are also different in just about every version of Batman, but if I remember correctly one of them was a ritual sacrifice to a demon that was stopped halfway when one of the cultists grew a spine and stood up against their leader, saving the sacrifice from dying but now the power of the demon takes effect upon all of Gatham, the weaker the mind the more effect it has
@@wouterkessel4852That's a cool explanation for why the status quo never changes.
I'm begging you use RVC instead of text to speech you can get so much better performances if you let it use your voice to get the inflections if you're going to use AI use the best tool there is
Wasn't there an actual comic where Batman had Bruce Wayne offer jobs to Black Mask's goons?
This is so cool and funny
This is why we need the mafia
Way to piss on Conroy's grave.