Like Norm Macdonald said, Spade is “probably the funniest guy in real life”. That is a hell of a thing for him to say and I believe him. I wish I was a quarter as funny as you, David. I will send you money, keep pumping out the content.
ive been listening to your audiobooks in my car and around the house lately. no one can make me laugh the same, incredible, just like chris. thank you for all the smiles
Omg I actually said BIP as a word at first 😂 this monologue was so funny. I really miss when you would come out at the end of Lights out and do them they were always hilarious. That was my favorite part of the show.
Love you Spade! You magnificent mumbling bastard. Seriously though, really good to see you, man, even with a budding case of jungle mouth. Love the subtitles. Be well, brother.
How dare you sir! After months of my covid "funny guy" all of a sudden it's like, "Off to do Kimmel, see you when I see you suckers." And you expect us to just welcome you back ? Well, I for one have to say, Thank you so much, please don't ever leave again, I didn't realize how much I needed someone to just crap on pop culture without serious regard for the Fs.
Awesome, just set the DVR to record the Batchelor for the first time-- literally the only exposure other than commercials is you... and its been so damn fantastic David, love it!!! BTW, you said you could do an entire book on the Batchelor, yes there is a market for it, and I will be one to buy it immediately!!!
How many times and on how many social media sites can I watch Spade tell the same story about crabs in the bedroom? Umm, I've lost count! Hilarious, I'm watching it again!
I really miss “Lights out”, one of the best shows lost because of the COVID pandemic. Comedy Central should do it again soon. Bachelor in paradise isn’t my type of show but I’d watch it if I could (I’m in NZ) just to see Spade hosting it. Anyone knows if there are any clips of him hosting it here on RUclips?
There's an old Smothers Brothers song called "Crabs Walk Sideways" about a love affair between a lobster and a crab -- a metaphor for an interracial romance. Now I got that song in my head, which is a good thing, cuz the Smos. Bros. were geniuses.
LOL! All of that was hilarious! The crabs posting up when you go towards them and the freakin' lima (lemur)! What? If you've ever stare at a lemur, they do not look nice....and the ones in his room are eating giant crabs! No to every bit of that!
3 года назад
Lemurs are endemic only to Madagascar, where there are zero Jaguars. 10 000 miles of separation. Cute story, Dave.
C'mon. If anywhere was gonna be infested with crabs, it'd be a Bachelor set.
We all went there, but you said it. Congrats!
He threw that out, but it was a decoy.
We kept waiting for him to circle back, like Milhouse "Just get to the fireworks factory!".
i see what you did there :)
I could listen to David Spade's stories to infinity. He is endlessly entertaining!
He’s one of my all time favorites…and I’ve been here a LONG time
Listen to his interviews on Stern. Amazing.
@@alexispaige9703 I will do that. Humor is medicine. Thanks for the tip!
SAME! 😍
Me, too!
There's no one like him.
Spade is intensely funny in an understated way.
Gifted
Crabs story is more fun than any movies ive ever seen this month
Netflix is an option, you don't have to stick to the movies on TV. Asking the nurse to change the channel is also an option.
David you see all these good comments about you, we all miss you. Listen comedy central bring back his show or something else with him on it, please ❣
🦀 We are hiding in your suitcase David!! 🦀
Please do more. We miss you. Loved your talk show.❤♠
Great story teller! I hope he's back for a while now doing these videos.
Dude I was cracking up over the jaguar, crabs and lemur
not too many jaguars
"Long story short. They also fall from the ceiling." = Gigglefest
Huh, Bachelor in Paradise... We’re all keeping our fingers crossed for that cameo on, ”the Real Housewives of Scottsdale” too Spade.
Could you expand this story into a movie? I didn't want it to end. Especially the crab action scenes!!! 🦀🤛
You make bachelor in paradise bearable 🤣 thanks for be real and making me smile!
🤣thanks for a few laughs Spade! 💕 Imagining you getting carried off into the sunset by crabs on the beach.
PS- great job hosting on Kimmel!
***No kidding!***Kimmel has NEVER BEEN AS FUNNY AS SPADE EVER (well...only when he cries about his mental family)!***
I am belly laughing! Love this guy
MORE content please! You’re the man! My wife and I tear up at most anything you do! This may or may not be the 3rd time I’ve watched this.
Your stay in “paradise “ with the fvcking crabs and lemur is the stuff of nightmares! But when you describe it, I laughed my ass off!!
I'm sure there are more than one type of crabs on the Bachelor in Paradise island...
Thanks for the monologue! I always appreciate Heather’s laughter in the background. 😂
Who is Heather?
@@tnt01 She usually is in the background during Dave’s monologues. An audience of one!
@@bfkennedy i know but who is she?
I missed this.Please do more.
He's back!
Crab walk “very disturbing “. Lolz
Where u b man missed you!!
David Spade is back. Gonna check out the show
No way in hell I'm checking out that show no matter how much I love David.. Sorry
This was funny though
It'd be worth it just to see him rag on them. Kind of like when he interviewed that Bachelor couple on Kimmel last week.
Way too much food for thought. Funny!
OMG Spade! Hell yes. So good to see you always. I've had to watch old Ellen clips and reactions to Joe Dirt just to get through the un-funny days.
Gotta be honest after hearing this if I had crabs in my room I would freaking hop between my bed and my furniture and not touch the ground at all.
Like Norm Macdonald said, Spade is “probably the funniest guy in real life”. That is a hell of a thing for him to say and I believe him. I wish I was a quarter as funny as you, David. I will send you money, keep pumping out the content.
Norm is the funniest guy anywhere. All comics say that. And I love Spade but Norm is just the GOAT.
glad to see you again D Spade !! I need comedy in these crazy covid times !!
ive been listening to your audiobooks in my car and around the house lately. no one can make me laugh the same, incredible, just like chris. thank you for all the smiles
Spade: a Man to help us through these trying times..by cracking us up...So Valuable
SO funny, such a great story Spade. Keep them coming!
I miss these updates!
more please
Good lord man, that was funny, the walking sideways and rearing up bit had me rolling. Think of the jokes you could write in 30 minutes.
Hello David, so glad you're back! ❤
Omg I actually said BIP as a word at first 😂 this monologue was so funny. I really miss when you would come out at the end of Lights out and do them they were always hilarious. That was my favorite part of the show.
don't worry so did i
Love you Spade! You magnificent mumbling bastard. Seriously though, really good to see you, man, even with a budding case of jungle mouth. Love the subtitles. Be well, brother.
Turn this story into a cartoon, immediately!
Long time, Dude. Glad to hear from you. I hope you are well.
I really miss him on YT. I 😂 too hard at this. I can listen to his stories all day
King Julian taken care of Spades crab problem...nice
How dare you sir!
After months of my covid "funny guy" all of a sudden it's like,
"Off to do Kimmel, see you when I see you suckers."
And you expect us to just welcome you back ?
Well, I for one have to say,
Thank you so much, please don't ever leave again, I didn't realize how much I needed someone to just crap on pop culture without serious regard for the Fs.
I love LAUGHING OUT LOUD FOR REAL- thank you!
I wish these were all the time again!!💜💜💜
Seriously give this man all the shows. He is so funny. Great host.
Hey who stole me lucky charms?
I don't watch Bachelor in Paradise but David is so hilarious! He's a man of our time!
Thank you for this. Haven't laughed this much in a while.
The Tiger Woods golf outting was good.
You are the most underrated comedian in Hollywood.
🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀🦀 THEY FOUND YOUR CHANNEL
I loved watching him on Lip Sync Battle... He "rocked it"... 😁
This is pure GOLD!
sounds like paradise for sure LOL
So David..........CHAPPELLE? Funniest shit to happen all month. I am SO GLAD you are on this show.
Couldn’t handle the crabs in my room. Or anywhere near me! Oh you have two lava lamps! Cool !
A Very welcome return 😀 I needed that! Just tell me where it is so I don't go there!
Awesome, just set the DVR to record the Batchelor for the first time-- literally the only exposure other than commercials is you... and its been so damn fantastic David, love it!!!
BTW, you said you could do an entire book on the Batchelor, yes there is a market for it, and I will be one to buy it immediately!!!
I have NEVER, EVER watched Bachelor before. For any reason. *But, I will now.*
That was so funny! I don’t watch BP but love watching you. You’re hilarious!
You rock !!
How many times and on how many social media sites can I watch Spade tell the same story about crabs in the bedroom? Umm, I've lost count! Hilarious, I'm watching it again!
Great one, Spade! Keep 'em coming.
DAVID SPADE SOS HERMOSO SALIDOS DESDE ARGENTINA
It's really impressive to watch you stand behind that desk for so long 😇
Imagine just sleeping and a crab falls from your ceiling-
Good to see you on youtube again David.
“Crabs walk sideways, lobsters walk straight.” - The Smothers Brothers
😂 he is so funny, I can see this so clearly in my mind thanks to his story & gestures! That was a good story - especially "jaugars!"
I really miss “Lights out”, one of the best shows lost because of the COVID pandemic. Comedy Central should do it again soon.
Bachelor in paradise isn’t my type of show but I’d watch it if I could (I’m in NZ) just to see Spade hosting it. Anyone knows if there are any clips of him hosting it here on RUclips?
It's always most funny to the lady that already knows the whole story but that was a good one hahaa
I love the closed captioning. I can't hear so great.
Dammit, Spade. I've never watched a Bachelor show before, but now that you're hosting, I have to see it.
There's an old Smothers Brothers song called "Crabs Walk Sideways" about a love affair between a lobster and a crab -- a metaphor for an interracial romance. Now I got that song in my head, which is a good thing, cuz the Smos. Bros. were geniuses.
"Gold I tell yah!"..."Gold!"
David Spade delivers better than Dominoes pizza. The jokes are always hot and ready.
He is the only person I would accept to replace Chris Harrison, sooooo funny!!!
I like it when Dave's sweet... not sarcastic. He's a gem. I hope he knows ❤️
Dave, only 2 people in this world who needs subtitles. Shaq, and people from Louisiana.
Loved this, had to watch it again! Who is the giggling girl? lol...
"im so busy with my papers.."
🤣🤣🤣😆😁
I'm opening a restaurant called "I got Crabs"
Gonna be a big 1st date spot.
....looking for investors. ...get in quick, Spadeeds.
You are too good for that.
"They could snap your finger like this ✂️ cause that's their only thing." Lol
Welcome back!
Yay the Lava Lamps are BACK 💙💜💙💜💙💜💙💜
Sounds like paradise, alright.
Oh shit David I'm sorry you had to go through that hahaha, that sounds terrifying! Holy shit
Absolutely love David Spade. He never gets enough credit. Probably just too cool for the main stream peeps. Lol
This was so wholesome 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Such a naturally funny man. love him
David, our people will call your people? But first, we need to find our people. Looking good my man!!
F yeah man, D Spade thanks for the laughs
Spades story telling is wicked, Man he keeps me in suspense ...🦀😯
That was actually a really good story.
LOL! All of that was hilarious! The crabs posting up when you go towards them and the freakin' lima (lemur)! What? If you've ever stare at a lemur, they do not look nice....and the ones in his room are eating giant crabs! No to every bit of that!
Lemurs are endemic only to Madagascar, where there are zero Jaguars. 10 000 miles of separation. Cute story, Dave.
Morris code, tap, tap, crab says to other crab, he looks like a midnight snack, yes, yes
I knew someone who raised tigers. He said he was more afraid of Lemurs than tigers. They’re vicious.
David KILLED on b.i.p.