Funniest joke... Bros b4 hose & Golden Girls Interestingly enough, Spade is older than Blanche, when that series started. New show idea... Golden Bros. starring Spade!
@@LastbutNotFirst Has to be the recently dusted off Dana Thomas Carvey. Think he’s pushing 70. Which shockingly, is about a decade older than Miss Estelle was when that show started… Believe the 2 are the same height though.
A+ game today Davey, dope shirt and hair. Where i grew up as a kid they did rattlesnake roundups for fun, which is just dumb. Got me with the golden girls joke
After watching BIP for years... I was laughing so bloody hard at these jokes... because you don't lie!!!!!!! hahahahaha Egads.... I'm gonna have nightmares now!!!! ;) hehehe Love you David.. these monologues are your best work!!!! Love from Canada!!!!
Love the spider talk. Lol But wolf spider bites don’t cause much harm to people, apparently! I say wolf spider, scorpion, black widow, rattlesnake for biting order
The 'There's a spider in your dinning room today' facial expression. Priceless. And, when paused right at that very moment of discovery .. you can almost hear tiny tiny screams of unbridled terror. Almost. 👌🏻👍🏻✌🏻
Pajamas should not have collars or pockets. The extra material around the neck could bunch up when laying on it and put pressure on an artery and possibly kill you.
Yeah, scorp kind of sounds better, but depends on what kind of scorp. Some spiders leave nasty wounds. We do not have any deadly spiders here, but the ones that have bitten me left me with bumps and terrible itching, so not a fun thing. But that theoretical question leaves you with no choice, just the succession in which you get the bites.
And at that moment I thought I might just lie there and never get up. I would just sit there and rot there, but then I looked up and saw the moon and got this weird feeling that Brandi was looking up at that same moon. Then I realized I had a home all along, in Silvertown.
Wolf Spider: - predator to a Brown Recluse Spider - Very large in size - fuzzy & furry appearance - pattern on its back with multiple colors; commonly stripes - weak venom and essentially harmless Your PJs are cool! 😁
i've never been this early, i found a spider a couple weeks ago, in the garage, i thought it was a fake halloween spider, and then it moved, it is huge, is, because it got away
@A.C. B. ART and he's been lunching on that ever since and oh yeah, did he ever tell you his father left for some cigarettes and never came back, not many people know that.
Missed a joke there with Tiger’s son Charles Woods... aka Chuck Woods... how much wood could a Chuck Woods chuck if Chuck Woods could Chuck Wood... I mean that’s where his dad got into trouble, chucking his wood at every girl he saw.
What’s crappin’n’?! Why did you stop doing the monologues David? I really miss watching you regularly, hope you have a new show in the works! Best regards, Cody.
That is one scary ass looking spider. I'll be seeing that bastard in my nightmares for the next week or so. Rather a scorpion bite... no venom and it's not a fucking spider.
REAL Commercial from "TMB": "hi my name is donnie berg and i've got a wicked long _______"(fill in the blank) *camera pans to the right as the mystery word is mentioned*
If you are gonna do the RUclips thing, spend 20 bucks on a lav mic Spadoodle. Save your adoring fans the trouble of cranking our volume up to 11 just to hear your subtle jabs.
@@PersonalityTurtle Depends. I have a $30 (Canadian) lav mic that works just as well as the $80-$100 models. If he is in his home office, with no wind and just his voice, all he needs is a basic mic.
same reason people say Oxy-cotton, when it is spelled Oxycontin. Same reason people say Brett Farve when his name is clearly Brett Favre. Pronunciation requires some measure of literacy, and that is just that. Pass me a glass of "warter", I'm thirsty.
@@Wingnut_Stickman "Farve" drives me crazy because it's stupid (illiterate, as you suggest), but that's actually an example of metathesis or transposition, which is a phenomenon recognized by linguists. A word or name that is foreign or complicated gets its letters switched around to make it easier or more familiar or manageable.
TGIF have a great weekend David and Heather. And tell your Mom hell I think she raised a very special wonderful young man, David Spade! I jadore you!!! I am sure your brothers are very special as well😊 what dates are you hosting Jimmy Kimmel? Please do the joke when you went the doctor of 25 pound mystery weight it is Hilarious!!!!!!!
after hosting Jimmy Kimmel, it turns out he was just using us to test out jokes, I feel so used...LOL
David Spade And Rob Schneider are Host of a Drive-In Comedy Show at the Ventura County Fairgrounds.
Not even a movie review or a short monologue? Where is David. We miss you.
You’re the only part of my day that I get to laugh! Please don’t stop posting these!!
More Bunker episodes!
For real, is he done? I loved them.
This is where I get my weekly news. Thank you
The only news worth watching
I get it here, but get my everyday new from TMZ 😃
Yeah, if you OVERDOSE! Just DOSE! 💀😂
Come back to us Spade!
Fave Joke: Ask for the "Impossibly Sad Burger"
Dave we love this don't ever stop! Movie Star, TV Star, Comedian David Spadeeeee
and extremely rich person, you forgot that..i hope his missus whom we never see is hot, wouldnt make sense to be rich and have an ugly missus
@@djizzah That's not his missus, it's his personal assistant
It's pronounced spadëee
@@djizzah
🔥
Funniest joke... Bros b4 hose & Golden Girls
Interestingly enough, Spade is older than Blanche, when that series started.
New show idea... Golden Bros. starring Spade!
whose gonna play estelle getty.
@@LastbutNotFirst
Has to be the recently dusted off Dana Thomas Carvey.
Think he’s pushing 70. Which shockingly, is about a decade older than Miss Estelle was when that show started…
Believe the 2 are the same height though.
It’s been over a month....are we being ghosted? Oh well, just want to say: “miss you Davey!”
A scorpion bite is harmless. It's sting, however....
Yeah, I guess I'm 'that guy'.
A+ game today Davey, dope shirt and hair. Where i grew up as a kid they did rattlesnake roundups for fun, which is just dumb. Got me with the golden girls joke
After watching BIP for years... I was laughing so bloody hard at these jokes... because you don't lie!!!!!!! hahahahaha Egads.... I'm gonna have nightmares now!!!! ;) hehehe Love you David.. these monologues are your best work!!!! Love from Canada!!!!
So many good jokes today. Favorite part was the spider though. Can’t touch him - Mr. spade adlib the best
$178 pj's check! Rolex check! Picture on Rolling Stone magazine check!
When is your next Monologue? Are you stopping? Did you go on vacation? Did you get the Corona?!
He’s under house arrest ??
Out of all the Spades, David's the ace. New comedy special: Ace of Spades.
Love the spider talk. Lol But wolf spider bites don’t cause much harm to people, apparently! I say wolf spider, scorpion, black widow, rattlesnake for biting order
The 'There's a spider in your dinning room today' facial expression. Priceless.
And, when paused right at that very moment of discovery .. you can almost hear tiny tiny screams of unbridled terror. Almost. 👌🏻👍🏻✌🏻
Elon Musk loves weird shapes when he is in his creative mode which is basically everyday.
Pajamas should not have collars or pockets. The extra material around the neck could bunch up when laying on it and put pressure on an artery and possibly kill you.
I'd rather get bit by a scorpion because their venom is in there stinger, not their bite.
Yeah, scorp kind of sounds better, but depends on what kind of scorp. Some spiders leave nasty wounds. We do not have any deadly spiders here, but the ones that have bitten me left me with bumps and terrible itching, so not a fun thing. But that theoretical question leaves you with no choice, just the succession in which you get the bites.
I was thinking the same thing!
The Wolf spider is not poisonous to humans. I still don't want to be bitten or stung by any of them. Well, maybe Heather.
The sound bites killed everytime
Impossibly Sad Burger
And at that moment I thought I might just lie there and never get up. I would just sit there and rot there, but then I looked up and saw the moon and got this weird feeling that Brandi was looking up at that same moon. Then I realized I had a home all along, in Silvertown.
Heather in the video with you PLEASE.
Wolf Spider:
- predator to a Brown Recluse Spider
- Very large in size
- fuzzy & furry appearance
- pattern on its back with multiple
colors; commonly stripes
- weak venom and essentially
harmless
Your PJs are cool! 😁
also, why would anyone worry about a scorpion bite? 🦂 It's the sting you have to look out for!
He meant brown recluse.
PJ's Malone is the new Hugh Hefner of comedy.
That all made me laugh...thank you man
Dave I hope you're gonna continue with the bunker Videos . Life just isn't as fun without ya man!! It's been a ra- ra-rough month since ya gone!
That was a good one plastic in the Kardashians
Might be some organs in their plastic.. hilarious.
i've never been this early, i found a spider a couple weeks ago, in the garage, i thought it was a fake halloween spider, and then it moved, it is huge, is, because it got away
I carried a huge spider out of my garage with a broom. He crawled under a leaf and hid.
Corona lingers so long it still makes jokes about Tiger King!
Straight single man who does know how to work a sheet
@3:24 is now on loop..over and over and over
You should take Jimmy Fallon's spot on the tonight show! You would kill it!
Where are youuuuuuu David?!!!
I actually screamed when I saw that spider.. I’m such a girl 😂. Great monologue, and can’t what to see you hosting Jimmy kimmel show next week 😁
Keeping me laughing just enough
Thx
Where has our Spadoodle gone?
I seem to think Johnny Carson would adore you and what you do here.
@A.C. B. ART and he's been lunching on that ever since and oh yeah, did he ever tell you his father left for some cigarettes and never came back, not many people know that.
@A.C. B. ART lol
I guess David's on break. Did I miss the memo? The Kimmel episodes were great. But we miss the dispatches from the bunker!
I also am a fan of your work,Thank you.
dad? where are you? it's been weeks...
"Organs in their plastic" deserved the applause break.
I can not imagine even driving some of these cars I do not care how cool people think they are I’m going back to a station wagon something safe!!!!!
I legit spit out my water at the coronavirus/tiger king joke. Thank you for continuing with the bunker monologues, but fuck do I miss lights out.
Just wanted to say, your appearance on Tigerbelly was awesome!! It made my day!
"Organs in their plastic" deserved funniest joke by far.
Corn off the cob. So under appreciated
You usually sneeze out, not in. When you have allergies.
David Spade dropping grenades.
Come on, we need to get 'spade'
Great show David! You’re the best!!
Tell Heather Hello the one with the cute laugh!!!!! We can not forget her!!!
When will Spade acknowledge that we are all obsessed with Heather?
More please
Makes it easier to stamp the steel.
sneeze out, not in...glorious.
Missed a joke there with Tiger’s son Charles Woods... aka Chuck Woods... how much wood could a Chuck Woods chuck if Chuck Woods could Chuck Wood... I mean that’s where his dad got into trouble, chucking his wood at every girl he saw.
Cute PJ’s
That was a good monologue enjoyed all of it!!! Have a great day and be careful always!!!!!
Hey buddy you're so animated and joyful. Or sarcastic and thats funny too. I adore you, David. 🤩💗♠️
Hi David!!!
these jokes are free for a good reason. i keeeed i keeed love ya spade o.
Oh my word how many spiders are near your home David I would be so scared I hate Spiders or any bugs that fly like roaches!!!!
Tiger Belly bit about Fish being annoyed at us thinking they smell “fishy”
I was told there wouldn't be any math
What’s crappin’n’?! Why did you stop doing the monologues David? I really miss watching you regularly, hope you have a new show in the works! Best regards, Cody.
That is one scary ass looking spider. I'll be seeing that bastard in my nightmares for the next week or so. Rather a scorpion bite... no venom and it's not a fucking spider.
REAL Commercial from "TMB": "hi my name is donnie berg and i've got a wicked long _______"(fill in the blank)
*camera pans to the right as the mystery word is mentioned*
Hello, Spade! 💗 PJs love them, sweetie! Love you!
oh, I made it when no one was looking, classic!!
"Bros before Hose" is the hardest I've laughed at one of your jokes in a couple months. Good to see you didn't "walk through" this one.
I didn’t get it until I saw it spelled out.
If you are gonna do the RUclips thing, spend 20 bucks on a lav mic Spadoodle. Save your adoring fans the trouble of cranking our volume up to 11 just to hear your subtle jabs.
Plz not $20, nothing under $100 is worth your cash haha
@@PersonalityTurtle Depends. I have a $30 (Canadian) lav mic that works just as well as the $80-$100 models. If he is in his home office, with no wind and just his voice, all he needs is a basic mic.
Killed!!! Hilarious, all of it!!
love your work...
I LOVE Heather's voice.
Fitted sheet was my fave.
That Kardashian applause break was more obvious than on The Big Bang Theory.
Don't let those Mars freaks off the hook, Spade. Also - spider jokes.
Kardashians! Ha ha. PJs = fabulous
I think you are thinking of brown recluse spider
Why does everyone pronounce it "fentanol" when it's spelled "fentanyl"?
@Rabid Teethmarks I think your first guess is right. They're used to that suffix.
same reason people say Oxy-cotton, when it is spelled Oxycontin. Same reason people say Brett Farve when his name is clearly Brett Favre. Pronunciation requires some measure of literacy, and that is just that. Pass me a glass of "warter", I'm thirsty.
@@Wingnut_Stickman "Farve" drives me crazy because it's stupid (illiterate, as you suggest), but that's actually an example of metathesis or transposition, which is a phenomenon recognized by linguists. A word or name that is foreign or complicated gets its letters switched around to make it easier or more familiar or manageable.
The tiger woods son cheating on his gf at the end really got me
Oh I thought he said cheating on his score. gf is funnier.
I laugh when Heather laughs. It’s the laugh track of our lives.
A wolf spider and brown recluse aren’t the same thing, Davey
Wolf spiders are harmless... he must be confusing them with something else.
Bros before hose!!!
What does it say about me that "ask for the Impossibly Sad Burger" was my choice for best joke today?
Good judge of comedy, it rocked
Yeah, the impossibly sad burger made me impossibly happy. Peace.
David DID NOT WRITE THURSDAY! It looks too nice.
I was bitten by a rattlesnake, a cobra, and a gila monster. plus thousands of non venomous bites, at work.
Hi Dave. Will you please tell me a story?
Wait, Tiger's son is named Charles Woods? You mean Chuck Woods, Wood Chuck. What?!?!.... How much wood could Chuck Woods chuck if..............
‘Rona & Tiger King.
TGIF have a great weekend David and Heather. And tell your Mom hell I think she raised a very special wonderful young man, David Spade! I jadore you!!! I am sure your brothers are very special as well😊 what dates are you hosting Jimmy Kimmel? Please do the joke when you went the doctor of 25 pound mystery weight it is Hilarious!!!!!!!