As someone who rarely gets take away and rarely eats out I have recently started going up to my local pub about every second week on a Tuesday night for their $15.00 steak, chips and salad special. Nothing flash but very nicely cooked, no cooking or cleaning for me and I do not take my phone, I eat alone and really just relax into the situation, food always tastes better when someone else cooks it, I just sit and listen and watch the other patrons while just zoning out from the days work and all that's on my mind. A personal treat and the company of another would not afford me the opportunity to just sit, eat and be where I am.
I spent a lot of nights away in my former job and found that restaurants are very used to catering for solo diners. I found that taking a book with you was perfectly acceptable (no scrolling on phones though, there’s plenty of other time for that). Always put the book down when being served and of course treat all serving staff with respect and friendliness.
Great information in this video. "Reading the room", so to speak, goes a long way in having proper etiquette in almost every situation. Excellent job as always Ash. Have a wonderful day!
First, great jacket! Second, I’m a lifelong bachelor living in an artsy neighborhood, and there are several restaurants that I’ve made it a habit to frequent. It’s best to get a table before or after the rush times. You get MUCH better service. My favorite eatery made it a habit to hire graduate students from the local university, had a smoking porch, and for years I’d take my coffee refill out, light up my pipe, and chat for an hour with the waiters and waitresses on their smoke breaks, and got involved in some of the most delightful conversations on all topics imaginable! So gents, NEVER allow yourself to think that you’re somehow better than the working class. You’re cutting yourself off from one of life’s greatest pleasures. I’m mindful of a great insight by W. H. Auden. He never minded when people talk shop, because that’s when he learned the most about how other people live, and what they really think.
At least the lady on earphones in the fine dining restaurant didn’t leave it on speaker phone 😂 but seriously that’s next level - the lady is inadvertently saying to everyone else “look people this place is no big deal, I come here all the time like it’s my local pub serving cheap and cheerful.”
Very interesting episode. I dine alone very often when I am on business trips. Like it a lot better, than dining with colleagues, to be honest. Very good advice, thanks Ash.
I remember visiting my brother in New York when he worked late hours as an investment banker. I'd eat alone in Manhattan's wonderful restaurants while I waited for him to clock off (normally around 10 pm, poor fellow), but I loved the experience. Eating alone does take a degree of confidence. That said, it seemed to be common in New York more so than elsewhere.
I occasionally visit UK hotels and restaurants when alone - my iPad at breakfast is very useful - reading the digital paper. I will happily engage with others but normally only when the cue to do so is clear.
All good points....like you, I dine out alone if im travelling for work (better than eating in your room).May have felt odd the 1st time but you used to it...all good advice....
Great episode as usually, dear Ash. Although it was not really about dining etuquette rules, I liked the fact that on the pre-view picture of your Episode the blade of the knife, lying on the table, was directed correcty toward the plate.
As a retired, single man, I often choose to eat alone. I tend to choose times outside the main meal rush hours, so I'm not worried about taking up a table for too long. I also typically eat at fairly casual places, so I will use that mealtime to catch up on my reading. What irritates me are those people who act as if there is something wrong, that I am forced to eat alone. There is nothing wrong with a person choosing to eat alone, so don't treat me like I am some sort of pariah.
Good stuff! Have dined alone numerous times but really never gave the experience a great deal of thought. Fortunately I have naturally minded myself in much the same manner. Parents taught us well. Kudos to your viewer for bringing it up.
Great video, Ash. I must add, I find that the US is much better suited to dining alone, where even top-tier restaurants have seating at the bar and strangers are much more extroverted and open to conversation
I'm glad to say that overtime I've become accustomed to eating alone, which I find liberating. I prefer not to watch any sort of content when dining in a restaurant. I stick to a quick read while waiting for the food. After which simply enjoy the moment, the ambience and food. Eating alone doesn't take long and I often do end up making new friends from time to time. My next barrier I wish to break is to speak in front of a camera. I'm terribly self-conscious and shy.
Hi Ash, Very interesting take on solo dining. I do avoid dining in upmarket establishments if I’m on my own, I always feel rather self conscious when surrounded by groups and couples who are obviously out celebrating something.
That's the only kind of tie I've worn in years. What I would really like is one with the Luther Rosette on it. I keep my eye out for one but have never seen one.
When eating one should concentrate on the food. Enjoy it, eat slowly. If you look at gadgets that distract you then what the point to dine out. If you are lonely take your journal and mark down details of the restaurant, staff and food which has connection with the moment.
I don't know about all of Europe, but in Germany it's very common for other diners to join your table. It's been actually pleasant the times I've had other diners seated at my table when alone. It might be a little uncomfortable if you're trying to have and intimate dinner date with aomeone.
Perhaps related to this is another question: how do I eat ALONE as a gentleman in my OWN four walls? It doesn't matter whether I just happen to be alone in the evening as the wife is out or whether I'm a widower or a bachelor. I noticed that I did not really sit down for meals and that I was just wolfing down the food. The table was still messy, the radio or TV was still on or I was eating from used dishes because I didn't feel like doing any extra washing up. Since this was getting on my nerves so much, I've now got into the habit of using good china and not some nondescript plate, putting a candle on the table and a nice tablecloth and a quality glass instead of the eternal IKEA one. And then I turn off the radio or TV and instead put on a CD instead. And when I'm doing this I start to enjoy my meal again although I may be on my own.
Great insite. I often find myself rushing through a meal when I am on my own because I feel like I am taking up the table. It does depend on how busy the establishment is though. I also tend to leave a higher percentage of gratuity to try and make up for the lack of a second place setting. Have to try some of these next time I find mysel out on my own.
Taking your time and not rushing is a very good bit of advice. If the place is packed, I try not to stay too long, but I prefer to eat at times when they aren't busy. My favorite time for lunch is between 2 pm and 4 pm. This goes back to when I was in high school and would spend the entire summer day (6 days a week) on a tractor. My father would eat a leisurely lunch at noon and then trade off my younger brother. He would eat a leisurely lunch and then go back to his tractor and then my father would drive my tractor while I went to eat. I'd typically aim to get to the house at 3 pm and could read and eat with little or no background noise. Some summers, we usually went over to my grandparent's house about two miles away and sit on their screened porch while reading the newspaper or whatever else I had to read. There was some background noise -- my parents and my grandmother talking -- but that wasn't too bad. For some odd reason, I remember reading about the Israeli attack on the USS Liberty in the newspaper sitting on her porch. Back to restaurants. I've had some fantastic meals in mid afternoon when I was the only customer in a local Italian restaurant. The food was perfect. The jazz background music was fantastic. The waitress was very attentive. And the book I brought with me was great. You can't ask for anything more than that. One day a couple of years ago, we were having a birthday meal at the office for another employee. It's a small office and we were all sitting around a large conference table. In the time it took me to eat my meal, our accounting clerk ate, ran around town for a while to run errands, and when she returned, I was just getting to eating the desert -- a piece of birthday cake. It was about an hour and a half, I think, for the entire meal.
As my wife and I are both travelers, I do this quite often. I generally sit at the bar and engage in conversations as they develop quite organically at the bar. Or if they don’t, I scroll on my phone… I never take a call.
Greetings Mr. Jones. I would suggest finding seating at a smaller table if possible. If not then the bar would do. However, I prefer to drink at the bar and eating at a table. I also like a positioning where I can observe the room and the comings and goings. I learned a long time ago to be aware of my surrounding. It was a nice video, Thank you.
Couple of things for me dining alone are, I always go when they are less busy, that way they will be happier to see you. Unless you can sit at the bar every table is at least a 2 top, so they are reducing their potential profit and the servers possible tip from the table. If you can, always pay with cash and when you go in ask if they accept cash. This has 2 benefits, in London a lot of restaurants are now card only but it also tells the server that their tip will be in cash which they keep 100% of, so they will be happier. If it is a cash only restaurant, ask the server if you can leave the tip in cash! Once again this tells the server that they are getting cash from you so will treat you better.
I’ve spent about 41 years dining alone for lunch and occasionally for evening meals or supper as we call it. I agree with you fully. I always try and leave an impression on my serving staff of a perfect customer, the kind they would like everyone to be. I’m sure I failed more than once, but that was my goal. I developed a pretty good sense of people who were open for a chat or kind remark or just eye contact and a friendly smile. Often that set the tone for others to follow and gave them a sense of my being harmless. Especially to a female or small group. I love taking in the whole experience and some of my favorite restaurants were more about the entire experience than the food. Well done video.
I used to travel a lot for business, and had a series of favorite restaurants I would frequent. It's actually nice to see the regular waitstaff at those places when you travel by yourself, as it adds a certain degree of familiarity to a city that is otherwise unknown to you.
Hello Ash, I wonder if you would mind telling us the make of that rather excellent wax jacket. Thank you for another very interesting and applicable video. All the best!
I enjoy dining alone. My day job, my son and my music take up most of my time so finding someone, usually last minute can be difficult and understandably so.
Interesting topic Ash. Glad you enjoyed Aachen. The meal looked delicious. If people speak to me I reciprocate, polite and short. I always sit by a window. At the club I put my phone away, members usually approach me to chat at the bar. Starlight
I have never dined alone in my life -and I'm almost fifty-eight. Of course, I do understand that some men are single, divorced, widowed, or travel for business, etc., and may find themselves in this situation from time to time. Excellent, practical advice as always, Ash. -Consideration for others is never a wrong step to take.
Ash being prevy to others conversations is one of my pet peeves. I can't stand qhen people set their phone up on the table on speaker and hold a loud conversation with someone else. If you are at the bar there will be more of a tendency to have conversations with other patrons. Good video Ash. Best regards Ron
Well… I feel that thats life today ash. Her strange choice of entertainment while in the restaurant. That happens today. Weird behavior but not uncommon today.
I have always eaten out solo more often than not. I was a single man for most of my life, and I also enjoyed a solo lunch break away from the office almost every single day. But I always avoided the more "posh" places. Or if you do a fancy white table cloth/ cloth napkin place on a business trip or something its best to choose the bar, or at least a small out of the way table in the corner. Before technology, I would always have a book or newspaper to occupy myself. Nowadays its usually my phone or tablet. But I would never call attention to myself by watching videos. Quietly reading is fine IMO at most everyday places, but have some class and respect and don't subject everyone else to your movies and videos, even with headphones. Nobody wants to jump up and down for your attention. Always be available for small talk or communicating with your waiter. If you have to take a call, keep it brief. Nobody want to overhear one side of a long phone call. And IMO that goes double for those wireless in ear things. Nothing annoys me more than someone seeming to talk to themselves in public, usually in an annoyingly loud voice.
I have never had a problem being / eating alone, seems im more the odd one. LoL Honestly these days if i get to eat on my own. (Married and children) I prefer to be outside on my own. I head out with a meal and find a quiet country side gravel road. Or if i have enough time i drive an hr to the mountains. The quietness and solitude is amazing and if im lucky ill see some bigger wildlife.
I believe a gentleman should practice what he preaches! Regardless if he is eating alone or with two or more people, he *should practice* dinning etiquette at all times _(where possible)._ As he doesn't know when he requires to eat out or have people around for a meal!
Great video, now do one on how to deal with really bad service. In my experience, waitstaff hate single diners because the amount of effort to serve you and the subsequent tip will be much smaller than say, a four top or six top. I have had my entire meal thrown down in front of me from drink, roll and butter, soup, salad, entree dessert and coffee which to me is a complete nightmare showing all those dishes at once. No sign of the waitstaff until check time and often that is thrown down as well. I had another time when I was not finished eating and the waitress took my food away. I assume it was end of her shift and she wanted to close out her tickets and tips. No problem. I paid with no tip and when asked why, I said she took away 20% of my food, I figured I would take away 20% of her tip too.
I think the noon meal is different. I know when I go out many tables will have solo business people. Almost everyone on a devices. As for interacting with other diners. At a bar I do converse with others, at a table, hardly ever.
An added tip for your consideration, know what you are trying to get out of dining solo. I dine solo a lot and many times I do it to be alone with my thoughts. In that case I do not go to a restaurant with hovering waiters. I may go to a casual restaurant above the fast food level where I am left alone. On the other hand, I may go out to enjoy a new dining experience and want to chat it up with the waitstaff to learn about the restaurant and the culinary view point of the chef. That is very different. So before picking a seat location, establish why you are there and what you are trying to get out of your solo experience. This will also help you identify what etiquette rules to apply.
Don't get too large a table? At one restaurant I used to go to, usually alone, whenever the largest table was empty, I took it. It could comfortably handle 6 to 8 people. The largest table was further from the smoking area than any other table in the restaurant. They had several tables for two, but every one of those was right by the smoking area. The only separation was a railing. Quite literally, you could be sitting one to two feet from someone blowing smoke everywhere. I sat at one of those tables once, and never again. Being allergic to smoke, I was choked up for hours afterwards. One thing, though. If someone came in and wanted to sit with me at that large table, that was fine with me. It isn't that unusual here for there to be a community table. If you are one of the locals, you can go sit there and nobody thinks a thing about it. You might be sitting there with one of the biggest farmers or ranchers in the area, a judge, a ranch cowboy, someone who is retired, the banker, ... . You usually know them, but sometimes you don't know them. It doesn't matter. If you are feeling at all sociable, sit down. It can be humorous, too. One day I walked into one place and the community table was full. One of the people there was a local farmer who was rather disagreeable and a bit of an ass. So I ignored him and said hello to everyone else. He nearly had a fit over that. That said, I usually don't sit at the community table. Instead, I normally take a newspaper, magazine, or book to read, some papers to work on, or a laptop to do some work on. One night in Houston about 50 years ago, I was reading The Economist while I ate. Some twit at the next table was strongly offended by it. Him being so easily offended by something that was none of his business was his problem, not mine.
My biggest issue with dining at expensive restaurants, is the other diners who decide to take lots of photos to probably post on their social media, which undoubtedly incidentally include myself in. The Ivy I have found is the worse for this. I have on many occasions been disgusted by loud obnoxious female groups at the Ivy.
Interesting topic. Dining alone is not something I do often now, but I had a job for nearly 15 years that required me to travel a lot and so I dined alone many, many times. In fact, I probably ate alone in restaurants at least 10 times a month during that time. I never felt self-conscious about it; I quite enjoyed it. I always had a book with me (this was before smart phones or tablets) and would quietly read as I ate. Reflecting back on it though, and after watching this video, I realise that I probably did that in restaurants where it was not appropriate and may have detracted from others’ dining experience.
If eating alone a book is nearly always appropriate. The one exception I can think of is if you are eating at an old style drug store deli counter (we have one in my county). The problem then is that you have to take up the place next to yours as well. On the other hand, that gives you space to take your hat off and set it on the stool,
“Verbs such as ”sit” and ”stand” are intransitive, meaning they cannot have a direct object, and thus they cannot be passive. Therefore although the progressive is possible with these verbs (”I am sitting”; ”they are standing”), the passive, well, shouldn't be… you cannot be “sat” or ”stood” “
I just find it odd that someone would go to a really nice restaurant and dine alone and then watch TV on their phone. I know people can do what they want, but I have to question one's motivations.
The lady sitting next to you was probably watching your RUclips videos on her cell phone and was thrilled to be sitting next to you.
As someone who rarely gets take away and rarely eats out I have recently started going up to my local pub about every second week on a Tuesday night for their $15.00 steak, chips and salad special. Nothing flash but very nicely cooked, no cooking or cleaning for me and I do not take my phone, I eat alone and really just relax into the situation, food always tastes better when someone else cooks it, I just sit and listen and watch the other patrons while just zoning out from the days work and all that's on my mind. A personal treat and the company of another would not afford me the opportunity to just sit, eat and be where I am.
I spent a lot of nights away in my former job and found that restaurants are very used to catering for solo diners. I found that taking a book with you was perfectly acceptable (no scrolling on phones though, there’s plenty of other time for that). Always put the book down when being served and of course treat all serving staff with respect and friendliness.
I have always enjoyed my own company when im dining out.
Great information in this video. "Reading the room", so to speak, goes a long way in having proper etiquette in almost every situation. Excellent job as always Ash. Have a wonderful day!
Glad it was helpful!
First, great jacket! Second, I’m a lifelong bachelor living in an artsy neighborhood, and there are several restaurants that I’ve made it a habit to frequent. It’s best to get a table before or after the rush times. You get MUCH better service. My favorite eatery made it a habit to hire graduate students from the local university, had a smoking porch, and for years I’d take my coffee refill out, light up my pipe, and chat for an hour with the waiters and waitresses on their smoke breaks, and got involved in some of the most delightful conversations on all topics imaginable! So gents, NEVER allow yourself to think that you’re somehow better than the working class. You’re cutting yourself off from one of life’s greatest pleasures. I’m mindful of a great insight by W. H. Auden. He never minded when people talk shop, because that’s when he learned the most about how other people live, and what they really think.
At least the lady on earphones in the fine dining restaurant didn’t leave it on speaker phone 😂 but seriously that’s next level - the lady is inadvertently saying to everyone else “look people this place is no big deal, I come here all the time like it’s my local pub serving cheap and cheerful.”
"Lady"? I don´t think so! How cheap and vulgar can you be to behave in such a manner in a place like that?
Very interesting episode. I dine alone very often when I am on business trips. Like it a lot better, than dining with colleagues, to be honest. Very good advice, thanks Ash.
I remember visiting my brother in New York when he worked late hours as an investment banker. I'd eat alone in Manhattan's wonderful restaurants while I waited for him to clock off (normally around 10 pm, poor fellow), but I loved the experience. Eating alone does take a degree of confidence. That said, it seemed to be common in New York more so than elsewhere.
Thanks for sharing
I occasionally visit UK hotels and restaurants when alone - my iPad at breakfast is very useful - reading the digital paper. I will happily engage with others but normally only when the cue to do so is clear.
All good advice. And always remember, just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.
All good points....like you, I dine out alone if im travelling for work (better than eating in your room).May have felt odd the 1st time but you used to it...all good advice....
Great episode as usually, dear Ash. Although it was not really about dining etuquette rules, I liked the fact that on the pre-view picture of your Episode the blade of the knife, lying on the table, was directed correcty toward the plate.
As a retired, single man, I often choose to eat alone. I tend to choose times outside the main meal rush hours, so I'm not worried about taking up a table for too long. I also typically eat at fairly casual places, so I will use that mealtime to catch up on my reading.
What irritates me are those people who act as if there is something wrong, that I am forced to eat alone. There is nothing wrong with a person choosing to eat alone, so don't treat me like I am some sort of pariah.
Good stuff! Have dined alone numerous times but really never gave the experience a great deal of thought. Fortunately I have naturally minded myself in much the same manner. Parents taught us well. Kudos to your viewer for bringing it up.
Excellent advice. Keep up the good work.
Great video, Ash. I must add, I find that the US is much better suited to dining alone, where even top-tier restaurants have seating at the bar and strangers are much more extroverted and open to conversation
I'm glad to say that overtime I've become accustomed to eating alone, which I find liberating. I prefer not to watch any sort of content when dining in a restaurant. I stick to a quick read while waiting for the food. After which simply enjoy the moment, the ambience and food. Eating alone doesn't take long and I often do end up making new friends from time to time. My next barrier I wish to break is to speak in front of a camera. I'm terribly self-conscious and shy.
Hi Ash, Very interesting take on solo dining. I do avoid dining in upmarket establishments if I’m on my own, I always feel rather self conscious when surrounded by groups and couples who are obviously out celebrating something.
First! Ash, ever consider wearing a bolo tie? Cheers from Appalachia.
That's the only kind of tie I've worn in years.
What I would really like is one with the Luther Rosette on it. I keep my eye out for one but have never seen one.
I have not, but I may incorporate this question into a future Q & A to address the subject more fully.
When eating one should concentrate on the food. Enjoy it, eat slowly. If you look at gadgets that distract you then what the point to dine out. If you are lonely take your journal and mark down details of the restaurant, staff and food which has connection with the moment.
I don't know about all of Europe, but in Germany it's very common for other diners to join your table. It's been actually pleasant the times I've had other diners seated at my table when alone. It might be a little uncomfortable if you're trying to have and intimate dinner date with aomeone.
Perhaps related to this is another question: how do I eat ALONE as a gentleman in my OWN four walls? It doesn't matter whether I just happen to be alone in the evening as the wife is out or whether I'm a widower or a bachelor. I noticed that I did not really sit down for meals and that I was just wolfing down the food. The table was still messy, the radio or TV was still on or I was eating from used dishes because I didn't feel like doing any extra washing up.
Since this was getting on my nerves so much, I've now got into the habit of using good china and not some nondescript plate, putting a candle on the table and a nice tablecloth and a quality glass instead of the eternal IKEA one. And then I turn off the radio or TV and instead put on a CD instead.
And when I'm doing this I start to enjoy my meal again although I may be on my own.
Yes, how to eat alone at home is also a great topic for an episode.
Great insite. I often find myself rushing through a meal when I am on my own because I feel like I am taking up the table. It does depend on how busy the establishment is though. I also tend to leave a higher percentage of gratuity to try and make up for the lack of a second place setting. Have to try some of these next time I find mysel out on my own.
Taking your time and not rushing is a very good bit of advice.
If the place is packed, I try not to stay too long, but I prefer to eat at times when they aren't busy. My favorite time for lunch is between 2 pm and 4 pm.
This goes back to when I was in high school and would spend the entire summer day (6 days a week) on a tractor. My father would eat a leisurely lunch at noon and then trade off my younger brother. He would eat a leisurely lunch and then go back to his tractor and then my father would drive my tractor while I went to eat. I'd typically aim to get to the house at 3 pm and could read and eat with little or no background noise.
Some summers, we usually went over to my grandparent's house about two miles away and sit on their screened porch while reading the newspaper or whatever else I had to read. There was some background noise -- my parents and my grandmother talking -- but that wasn't too bad. For some odd reason, I remember reading about the Israeli attack on the USS Liberty in the newspaper sitting on her porch.
Back to restaurants. I've had some fantastic meals in mid afternoon when I was the only customer in a local Italian restaurant. The food was perfect. The jazz background music was fantastic. The waitress was very attentive. And the book I brought with me was great. You can't ask for anything more than that.
One day a couple of years ago, we were having a birthday meal at the office for another employee. It's a small office and we were all sitting around a large conference table. In the time it took me to eat my meal, our accounting clerk ate, ran around town for a while to run errands, and when she returned, I was just getting to eating the desert -- a piece of birthday cake. It was about an hour and a half, I think, for the entire meal.
As my wife and I are both travelers, I do this quite often. I generally sit at the bar and engage in conversations as they develop quite organically at the bar. Or if they don’t, I scroll on my phone… I never take a call.
Greetings Mr. Jones. I would suggest finding seating at a smaller table if possible. If not then the bar would do. However, I prefer to drink at the bar and eating at a table. I also like a positioning where I can observe the room and the comings and goings. I learned a long time ago to be aware of my surrounding. It was a nice video, Thank you.
Couple of things for me dining alone are, I always go when they are less busy, that way they will be happier to see you. Unless you can sit at the bar every table is at least a 2 top, so they are reducing their potential profit and the servers possible tip from the table. If you can, always pay with cash and when you go in ask if they accept cash. This has 2 benefits, in London a lot of restaurants are now card only but it also tells the server that their tip will be in cash which they keep 100% of, so they will be happier. If it is a cash only restaurant, ask the server if you can leave the tip in cash! Once again this tells the server that they are getting cash from you so will treat you better.
Thank you Ash good content as usual.
Glad you enjoyed it!
I’ve spent about 41 years dining alone for lunch and occasionally for evening meals or supper as we call it. I agree with you fully. I always try and leave an impression on my serving staff of a perfect customer, the kind they would like everyone to be. I’m sure I failed more than once, but that was my goal. I developed a pretty good sense of people who were open for a chat or kind remark or just eye contact and a friendly smile. Often that set the tone for others to follow and gave them a sense of my being harmless. Especially to a female or small group. I love taking in the whole experience and some of my favorite restaurants were more about the entire experience than the food. Well done video.
I used to travel a lot for business, and had a series of favorite restaurants I would frequent. It's actually nice to see the regular waitstaff at those places when you travel by yourself, as it adds a certain degree of familiarity to a city that is otherwise unknown to you.
Hello Ash, I wonder if you would mind telling us the make of that rather excellent wax jacket. Thank you for another very interesting and applicable video. All the best!
It’s a Barbour ‘Kyle’ jacket.
@@TheChapsGuide many thanks!
I enjoy dining alone. My day job, my son and my music take up most of my time so finding someone, usually last minute can be difficult and understandably so.
I've dined alone many times at casual/buffet places. I always bring a magazine or newspaper. Always enjoyed the experience!
Interesting topic Ash. Glad you enjoyed Aachen. The meal looked delicious. If people speak to me I reciprocate, polite and short. I always sit by a window. At the club I put my phone away, members usually approach me to chat at the bar.
Starlight
I have never dined alone in my life -and I'm almost fifty-eight.
Of course, I do understand that some men are single, divorced, widowed, or travel for business, etc., and may find themselves in this situation from time to time.
Excellent, practical advice as always, Ash. -Consideration for others is never a wrong step to take.
Ash being prevy to others conversations is one of my pet peeves. I can't stand qhen people set their phone up on the table on speaker and hold a loud conversation with someone else. If you are at the bar there will be more of a tendency to have conversations with other patrons. Good video Ash. Best regards Ron
Well… I feel that thats life today ash. Her strange choice of entertainment while in the restaurant. That happens today. Weird behavior but not uncommon today.
I love eating solo at the bar at posh restaurants. People watching is fun!
I have always eaten out solo more often than not.
I was a single man for most of my life, and I also enjoyed a solo lunch break away from the office almost every single day. But I always avoided the more "posh" places. Or if you do a fancy white table cloth/ cloth napkin place on a business trip or something its best to choose the bar, or at least a small out of the way table in the corner.
Before technology, I would always have a book or newspaper to occupy myself. Nowadays its usually my phone or tablet. But I would never call attention to myself by watching videos. Quietly reading is fine IMO at most everyday places, but have some class and respect and don't subject everyone else to your movies and videos, even with headphones. Nobody wants to jump up and down for your attention. Always be available for small talk or communicating with your waiter. If you have to take a call, keep it brief. Nobody want to overhear one side of a long phone call. And IMO that goes double for those wireless in ear things. Nothing annoys me more than someone seeming to talk to themselves in public, usually in an annoyingly loud voice.
When it comes to engaging with other diners my rule of thumb is simple, dining room no, bar yes.
I have never had a problem being / eating alone, seems im more the odd one. LoL
Honestly these days if i get to eat on my own. (Married and children) I prefer to be outside on my own. I head out with a meal and find a quiet country side gravel road. Or if i have enough time i drive an hr to the mountains.
The quietness and solitude is amazing and if im lucky ill see some bigger wildlife.
I believe a gentleman should practice what he preaches! Regardless if he is eating alone or with two or more people, he *should practice* dinning etiquette at all times _(where possible)._ As he doesn't know when he requires to eat out or have people around for a meal!
Great video, now do one on how to deal with really bad service. In my experience, waitstaff hate single diners because the amount of effort to serve you and the subsequent tip will be much smaller than say, a four top or six top. I have had my entire meal thrown down in front of me from drink, roll and butter, soup, salad, entree dessert and coffee which to me is a complete nightmare showing all those dishes at once. No sign of the waitstaff until check time and often that is thrown down as well.
I had another time when I was not finished eating and the waitress took my food away. I assume it was end of her shift and she wanted to close out her tickets and tips. No problem. I paid with no tip and when asked why, I said she took away 20% of my food, I figured I would take away 20% of her tip too.
I fully agree with your response, good service = good tip | poor service = no tip | simple!
I think the noon meal is different. I know when I go out many tables will have solo business people. Almost everyone on a devices. As for interacting with other diners. At a bar I do converse with others, at a table, hardly ever.
An added tip for your consideration, know what you are trying to get out of dining solo. I dine solo a lot and many times I do it to be alone with my thoughts. In that case I do not go to a restaurant with hovering waiters. I may go to a casual restaurant above the fast food level where I am left alone. On the other hand, I may go out to enjoy a new dining experience and want to chat it up with the waitstaff to learn about the restaurant and the culinary view point of the chef. That is very different. So before picking a seat location, establish why you are there and what you are trying to get out of your solo experience. This will also help you identify what etiquette rules to apply.
Don't get too large a table?
At one restaurant I used to go to, usually alone, whenever the largest table was empty, I took it. It could comfortably handle 6 to 8 people.
The largest table was further from the smoking area than any other table in the restaurant.
They had several tables for two, but every one of those was right by the smoking area. The only separation was a railing. Quite literally, you could be sitting one to two feet from someone blowing smoke everywhere.
I sat at one of those tables once, and never again. Being allergic to smoke, I was choked up for hours afterwards.
One thing, though. If someone came in and wanted to sit with me at that large table, that was fine with me.
It isn't that unusual here for there to be a community table. If you are one of the locals, you can go sit there and nobody thinks a thing about it. You might be sitting there with one of the biggest farmers or ranchers in the area, a judge, a ranch cowboy, someone who is retired, the banker, ... . You usually know them, but sometimes you don't know them. It doesn't matter. If you are feeling at all sociable, sit down.
It can be humorous, too. One day I walked into one place and the community table was full. One of the people there was a local farmer who was rather disagreeable and a bit of an ass. So I ignored him and said hello to everyone else. He nearly had a fit over that.
That said, I usually don't sit at the community table. Instead, I normally take a newspaper, magazine, or book to read, some papers to work on, or a laptop to do some work on.
One night in Houston about 50 years ago, I was reading The Economist while I ate. Some twit at the next table was strongly offended by it. Him being so easily offended by something that was none of his business was his problem, not mine.
Welcome back
My biggest issue with dining at expensive restaurants, is the other diners who decide to take lots of photos to probably post on their social media, which undoubtedly incidentally include myself in. The Ivy I have found is the worse for this. I have on many occasions been disgusted by loud obnoxious female groups at the Ivy.
Interesting topic. Dining alone is not something I do often now, but I had a job for nearly 15 years that required me to travel a lot and so I dined alone many, many times. In fact, I probably ate alone in restaurants at least 10 times a month during that time. I never felt self-conscious about it; I quite enjoyed it. I always had a book with me (this was before smart phones or tablets) and would quietly read as I ate. Reflecting back on it though, and after watching this video, I realise that I probably did that in restaurants where it was not appropriate and may have detracted from others’ dining experience.
If eating alone a book is nearly always appropriate.
The one exception I can think of is if you are eating at an old style drug store deli counter (we have one in my county). The problem then is that you have to take up the place next to yours as well. On the other hand, that gives you space to take your hat off and set it on the stool,
“Verbs such as ”sit” and ”stand” are intransitive, meaning they cannot have a direct object, and thus they cannot be passive. Therefore although the progressive is possible with these verbs (”I am sitting”; ”they are standing”), the passive, well, shouldn't be… you cannot be “sat” or ”stood” “
Good evening Ash
Dutch:een heer gebruikt een botermesje,ook als hij alleen is😊
Where in Wales do you come from? Guess this by your accent. I lived in Cardiff for 20 years
Aberdare
which arrangement is this, since it lacks altos and sopranos?
whoops sorry Ash - meant to comment on the video i was watching before yours and i must have pressed 'reply' a few seconds too late!
👊
My pleasure Pete.
We are a relational species and we are not supposed to be living or eating alone.
Why spend your hard-earned cash on Rowley's when Wiltons is so much nicer?
I wanted to give it a try.
I just find it odd that someone would go to a really nice restaurant and dine alone and then watch TV on their phone. I know people can do what they want, but I have to question one's motivations.