I’m 16 and I was so happy finding your page. I always felt like 💩 about my hair because as a lightskin Black person, there is this ignorant texture you’re expected to have. Really refreshing seeing someone who looks like me!! Keep doing you sis!
I get you. A hair stylist who wasn't even my own wanted to touch my hair and said you got the skin in the eyes but you didn't get the hair! How insulting! I've got the hair in the texture that God intended!
@@sable7114 sorry you had to deal with that, my heart goes out to brown skin women who have to deal with Texturism AND colorism. Next time, you have the right to ask them “what do you mean by that” and they will be stuck. So ignorant ppl think a skin color implies a certain “look” you know?
I’m a Black male and I’ve sometimes felt down about my hair texture, but watching this has been a great boost of morale. You spoke nothing but facts!!!
And I was chatting with a guy from India to tell me he doesn't like afro hair and he prefers straight hair. I educated him on afro hair and then told him I was no longer interested.✌🏾
I've honestly never understood how anyone can dislike any particular hair type. There are women all over the planet, of every ethnicity and culture, who have gorgeous hair. What they all have in common isn't the texture or color of their hair, but time and energy they put into getting it healthy and keeping it that way. That, and a healthy dose of self love make the perfect recipe for beautiful hair. Love yourself and take care of yourself, and you will have beautiful hair. Period.
I loved this video. As a biracial 16 year old girl with low porosity and type 4c hair, growing up in an all white household and a predominantly white area hasn’t been the easiest when it came to my looks. I wasn’t taught to do anything with my hair, so its an afro all the time because thats just how it grows (with the weekly wash routine of course). A lot of adults scold me for it, which is a shame. And for awhile I thought the same, but I wouldn’t trade my hair for anything in the world. I might have not been blessed with the plump lips of a black woman, but at least this luscious ball of floof makes up for it! 😅 My crown has a mind of her own, but instead of trying to fit her into this box and suffocate her with products, I’ve learned to replenish and nourish her. I give my hair what it needs, and in return it makes sure the sun doesn’t fry my scalp off (and that I look good too). Other people’s beauty standards are not my problem, and our individuality needs to be praised more often by ourselves; because unfortunately, there is no guarantee that people will accept us as the unique individuals we all are
“American culture is basically black culture at this point” 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 SAY IT AGAINNN!! It’s annoying that people never want to acknowledge what black people have contributed. When we talk about box braids or rap and people say that “no one owns box braids or rap”... but we made it tho but its easy to discredit than credit. Society has excluded black people but loved to imitate the culture..anyways Dang Joy el 😭😭I felt so attacked because it was like you were speaking directly at me. I loved everything about this video because I definitely agree and I love your hair and you inspire me to learn about my hair
Preach girlfriend! I’m 48 and have always loved my hair. It never occurred to me not to. It’s part of who I am. I don’t want straight hair, wavy hair, 4A hair, etc. I’m 4C and ❤️every coil, kink and even fairy knots.
Well said. I came to love my hair by setting 2 rules for my journey. 1. Hair must always be clean, moisturised 2. Low maintenance. I find the natural hair community is obsessed with “long” hair (which in itself is a European standard of beauty) and excessive product buying . So I tend to just avoid the natural hair community and do my own thing.
A lot of us are not just natural for our hair, but natural for the environment and animals. A whole lifestyle of trying to clean up our practices. Those are expensive, fair trade and eco be like that.
I don’t think it’s just European idk where people got that from, but a lot of cultures praise and parade long hair. Short hair is still beautiful but long hair isn’t a European thing.
@@soph3378 I say European because I live as a minority in their culture. But it doesn’t change the fact that our hair is different to every other race. Every other race has hair that grows down wards therefore is long. Our hair grows up therefore should be referred to as tall, it shrinks etc everything about the nature of our hair is anything but long and flowing. Yet we still use that language and we still obsess about long hair. Just explaining my thoughts 💭 obviously everyone is entitled to their own
While I agree that excessive stretching and manipulation can be problematic, Europeans are not the only ones who can grow long hair. Yes, shrinkage must be embraced to cultivate a healthy head of hair. But, at the same time, I personally consider the effort to grow healthy hair and retain length to be a form of self-care! This isn't like wanting to change fixed physical traits such as complexion or nose width. With love and care, even an afro will get bigger hence "longer", right? I have seen more women, myself included, become much more mindful about diet and exercise once embracing a natural hair journey because I truly feel our hair is a direct reflection of our well-being. But again, just my opinions and you're of course entitled to yours. Sending peace and love!
I stopped comparing my hair to looser hair types. Now it’s ok if my 4c wash n go doesn’t look like a 3c wash n go, it’s ok if my twist out/braid out doesn’t look like a 4a twist out/braid out or that my hair shrinks way more or that my current length doesn’t hang down. That is my hair type and that is ok 😊
Today I had some kind of a nervous breakdown and I started to cutting my hair out of frustration. I felt defeated, weak and I was so embarrassed but I took myself to a hairdresser nearby and they made some "bob a like" haircut out of the mess I've created. With that being said, I have naturally straight/ wavy hair and for the first time, having my hair this short I kinda like it. I will start embracing my hair and give myself a break from years of heatstyling my hair. Even though I don't have naturally curly, kinky hair I truly found this video to be so empowering and a breath of fresh air. You are truly beautiful and this was exactly what i needed, thank you. much love from Sweden
I have type 4a/b hair. I used to not like my hair and eventually damaged it because I straightened it daily. Then one day, I decided to transition. I've been natural for like 5yrs now and it was one of the very few best decisions I've made in my life lol. My hair is flourishing, it's the longest it's ever been and I'm OBSESSED with it. My suggestion for anyone struggling with embracing their natural hair is to: 1) As you said Joel, stop talking negatively about your hair it's beautiful trust me!! 2) Treat your hair like the finest silk there is. Make your wash/styling days a self care sesh. Don't do it when you're already stressed/upset or else you'll take it out on your hair and hurt her (her as in your hair) and yourself. 🥺 3. Don't complicate your hair routine!!! I'm the laziest natural there is and my hair is almost down to my hips! All I do is wash once every two weeks, deep condition EVERY time I wash, then moisturise. And if I style I mostly do wash and go's or braid outs and I don't obsessed over curl definition. I don't have that much hair to have every curl poppin so I embrace my frizz. That's also less manipulation. I also keep my hair under wigs during the winter as a break from manipulation. Couture (my hair's name) is currently hibernating atm. Hopefully, these steps will help you realize how lucky you are to have the texture you have. And in return your hair will flourish and you will fall in love with it day by day! ☺️💖👩🏽🦱
I swear I literally just was making lovvvve to my hair as I was conditioning it earlier and making sure I was speaking and thinking only good thoughts about. That’s how we can grow truly healthy natural hair 🤍 I’m learning to love my hair which had been so hard but I’m hopeful 🤞🏾
Jokes! Thought I was the only one! Wash day I put my music on and fully focus on her. When putting my conditioner on I'm telling her how well she's doing, how proud I am of her, how I promise to look after her and thank God for blessing me with her. And do you know something?...she talks back!
I had to be patient with my hair. I also tell other naturals stop talking negatively about your hair. Your hair feels that negativity. This is you in naked form. It’s beautiful. We’re Unique.
I have straight hair. I'm white. But I've always wished that I had curls. I think your hair is so beautiful and if I could have it for just one day I'd be the happiest person. But I never will and that's ok. I've always been told that I have the "ideal" hair and that's always made me cringe because curls, coils....that's what I find beautiful. I wish black women woudnt put their hair down because it's one of the many things I find the most beautiful about you. (Btw I'm a hairdresser and my name's Becky 🤣🤣😂)
I would have to tell people the 'bad part' of having hair texture like mine because ALL I heard was you have such "good hair" "If I had your hair I wound" & I felt like I had to feel bad because I had the hair God gave me. I started saying "What would you do with my hair? You go to the hairdresser, get your hair done and it stays in that style for almost 2 weeks. I go to the hairdresser, get my hair done, go to bed and my hairstyle is MESSED UP! $50-$60 down the drain. SO ... THAT'S what you'd do IF YOU HAD MY HAIR" OAN: There's NO 'GOOD hair, BAD hair' everyone's hair is beautiful! I still hear it now & then but not as much as I did in high-school & college but I still correct it when I hear it. As you said - we ALL have unique beautiful hair unique to each of our bodies 💯😁
Girl.....GIRRRRL!!!!! I Don't even have anything to say except AMAZING 👏👏👏👏💖💖🎊🎊🥳🥳🥰🥰😭😭😇😇😭😭🥰🥰🎊🥳👏👏👏🥰😭💖💖😇😇👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏😎😎👏💖😎😎😎👏💖😎😎😎👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏😍😘 I Just love you SO DANG much ❤
I love my hair, but it took yeeeears. I'm in mid age and finding joy and peace with who you are is one of the blessings of getting older. No matter what your age, it takes courage to truly be yourself just as you are. Love Yourself ❤
I love my natural hair! I had a hard time dealing with when it was extremely short. Now that my fro has grown to pass at least my ear when I stretch it out on the side. It took a year for me to get to this point of having somewhat of a regimen. My hair is the thickest, prettiest and softest it's ever been. Also, I love the jewelry show! I am a brutally honest teacher and warehouse worker. Recently, at home and work, I have had some fallouts about it.
You saying that our hair is the most unique made me SO unbelievably happy. Thank u so much for this video, I have very similar hair to yours but your hair is longer than mine and I always compare my hair length to yours and make myself feel bad. But I should love my hair as it is because it’s great ❤️
My God! Where was this girl when I was in my twenties! I am just now learning to love my hair and I am 40+... I had duck lips and ant butt and 4b/c first! 🙋🏾♀️
You are right! I always talk negatively about my hair. I have 4C hair and I've been relaxer free since spring 2019 and 100% natural since my big chop in June. I'm still not at the point where I love my hair, but I'm hoping I'll get there.
Love the jewerly! When people are negative when it comes to what God gave them shows no appreciation! He gave us what He wanted each individual to have!! We have been so blinded by what society think what our hair should look and feel like! I love my 4c kinky curly hair!! Thanks for giving the encouragement!!
I really Needed to see this right now.. I just took out my Brazilian bundles and I looked in the mirror and cried because I felt ugly.. but your really giving me the confidence to just wear it out... Thankyou joy❤️
My five year old literally messages my head and he says he loves my natural hair. He asked me why I put my hair in braids when I can just wear my natural hair. He is so smart.
Thank you Joyel, this was empowering. Everything you said not only applies to hair but to just about every aspect of life. Honorable mention to "grow a set of ovaries" and "what other people think about you is none of your business"
This is why you are one of my favorite youtubers 🥺 this video is now gonna help me with more than my hair (well-being in general) THANK YOU JOY-EL🥰❤️ time to get outta bed
I really needed this thank you so much Joel. Sometimes when I see girls with long straight hair or even long 4C hair I get so upset about mine because it’s not that long (SHRINKAGE IS SO REAL) and honestly sometimes I wish that I had straight hair. Shirt 4C hair isn’t seen as desirable and that’s so sad. I think my hair is beautiful when I wash it and it’s moisturised but honestly I don’t really know how to take care of it. I used to constantly but it in box braids because I didn’t want to take care of it and I used to pray to God that I would have the courage to wear my natural hair. But even I wasn’t really taking care of it. It’s been so difficult to know which products work for me. I hope to find those products one day. I appreciate you and your channel and seeing your progress. You are have a huge light❤️❤️❤️
Deep condition. Keep your hair moisturized between wash days. The products you use to maintain moisture may differ depending on your hair style and how long you go between wash days. I keep my hair twisted in small-ish twists, even during wash days. I wash every 2 weeks. I don't use heavy butters because they seal moisture too well and don't allow enough moisture in when I want to spritz it. I stick to oils and medium/light creams and reapply when needed. If you wash weekly, you can use heavier butters. I'd be careful with adding hair as the weight will pull your hair out too. I'd also suggest looking into ayurvedic treatments.
I needed this pep talk. Lately I’ve been feeling so frustrated with my hair and wishing I had a looser curl pattern so that my hair would behave better. I spent hours detangling, deep conditioning, using heat to make it penetrate, moisturizing and stretching my hair, wear a silk bonnet to bed everyday and sleep on silk pillows. Here I am 2 days later after wash day and my hair feels dry as hell. Plus, I’m drinking 2.5 litres of water a day and taking supplements. I just don’t know what I’m doing wrong 😪
I feel like me finally taking time to learn my natural hair was the first step I took in self-love. 3 years of trial and error turned my hair into my crown and just like that all these years of self-hate disappeared. Learning to adore my natural hair helped me to love me and anytime one of my friends come to me and say they want to transition I am 100% there with all the tips and support. I remember I had no support system and a lot of my friends complain about going through the same lack of support so I love being that one person in their corner. So in a lot of ways I relate to this video, I love to see my loves in their embracing their kinks, coils and curls. It's such a struggle but when the war is won, there is nothing that can stop that empowerment one gets from the self-love❤
Bwahaahaa 😂😂😂 duck lips and ant butts!!! Oh ma gaaaaaaahhh I love you girl!! Exactly!!! Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one, and some are shittier than others. Ijs.
. I'm 5 years into my natural hair journey and I had so many moments where I almost gave up or was scared to wear my hair the way God made it out of fear of judgement in the work place. It's so hard to look in the mirror and accept yourself sometimes but I had to practice telling myself that I am beautiful just like you said to get over that. I'm much more confident now but I still have my moments where I am learning to love myself. Everything you said is inspirational.
this message is powerful, and I applaud you for bringing it to us. I just did a big loc chop, and now have a twa, my fiance said he likes big afros, I thought about his comment for a few days then told him to apologize for that comment, he said he didn't say it. Pissed me off so much. I have been natural nearly all of my life, and I love my hair and my color. Thank God for this powerful message.
Sharmaine, I have followed your natural hair journey since your big chop and you are one of the persons who inspired my big chop from relaxed hair at the end of March 2019. I hated my relaxed hair because it was thin and I always experienced breakage which prevented my hair from growing beyond shoulder length. I love my natural low to medium density hair. It is not fast growing as I am only at 9 to 10 inches in length at this point but it is the healthiest my hair has been in years. I love shrinkage because it gives my hair the appearance of volume. My insecurity was in regard to my grays. I stopped coloring my hair in March 2020 because I made the decision to embrace my grays. Now I feel totally liberated. Thank you Sharmaine for this powerful video. I pray for your continued growth and success. Much blessings and love to you. As always, you know I have to express my love for your hair. Just gorgeous!😍😘💕
Preach Joy-el! The natural hair journey isn’t easy as you said, but you can definitely get there. When I started growing my hair natural it was very difficult, there are so many things that can get in your way to stop you from loving your own hair but here I am. I’ve been growing my 4b/4c hair for almost 3 years and now I love it so much, I can see the beauty in it. Guys, do never give up! It’s very satisfying to see how far you’ve reached later ❤️
Beautifully said joyel! Yeah I dated a guy like that, the relaxer couldn't even get my hair straight enough for him so I figured it's not me that you want and you're not paying for these hair stylist appointments. Why did I even try? Beautiful jewelry as well. In case you don't have another video out before Thanksgiving, have a Happy Thanksgiving! Everyone be safe!
I needed to hear this and so did others joyel your my role model you have so much confidence i have 4c hair and people call it nappy but at the end of the days I still learn how to love my hair
thank you🥺❤️I really did need this since everyone else in my family has 2-3type curls or relaxed hair and whenever I try to wear my natural fro they just see it as messy and “unkempt”
My Lord, this girl is a miracle and living legend! God Bless you! xx The beauty of her intellect and soul is outstanding! May you always be triumphant!
I agree with all, just if some say “i like you but i dont like your natural hair”, its just one opinion. I think if really having self love that person can take every opinion and not attact it to own self
Thank you for being you and sharing you with us. I’ve never been able to relate to someone like I do you and I would love to thank you for that. thank you for showing the ups and the downs and being real. Thank you for wearing your hair and showing us, thank you for everything. You are amazing and so so valued.
Excellent video! Excellent message! It takes me out every time you’ve said duck lips and ant butts😹🤣😂 Everything was true, they want what makes us us. I’ve seen those video of the folks in Asia getting stuff done to get texture. It’s absolutely crazy but then the moment water hits it back to flat😹 Great Great video💚
I must say, I realize my hair loves rice water as pre poo...for me its game changer..perfect balance of conditioning and strength for my high porosity hair. I keep rubberbanded at the root, then twist and braids.
YEEEEESSSSSSS! Thank you so much for doing this video! Nothing but FACTS! I just shared it with my Daughter! Told her to listen to it daily. I so appreciate all you do and this video couldn't have been created at a better time! Thank you speaking Truth!!!!! Well said and done. Peace and love!
Joy-el thanks I really needed this i have 4c hair and people call it nappy your my role model you should try coco black naturals new hair products I seen them on Facebook and they had type 4 coils poppin
I love seeing your videos love the pep talk ones the MOST!! I'm still letting my hair grow out and I'm happy with my choice. It is strange that we get so many ppl that wanna touch it or they are like omg your gonna let it grow out... Your right our hair is unique we must flaunt lol
YES! Oh my gawsh, I LOVE YOU! Your message is empowering and amazing! If you get just one person to embrace who they are, then you have done something profound. We have ALWAYS added swag to EVERYTHING, we can turn water into swag! Ha! “Love yourself first”. Very good. Keep up the good work. 😁 Our hair IS beautiful!!!! ❤️
Thanks for the video, I been on and off with the way I feel, I always say it's love and hate feeling with my hair but I want change that & your so right this is your hair & you should love & except everything about you.🥰 Thank you btw Great video!!
10 secs in.. Just on video title had to give it a like. This is really awesome content. I know some teens who could really benefit from this video. God bless you, Joyel👏🏾
Thanks for this amazing video ! I Have been on this journey for more than 5 years and its tough , but I love my hair so much. I keep my consistent hair care routines no matter what . thank you again and good luck !
Definitely don't talk negatively about your hair. Trust it impacts how you see yourself. Trust kinky hair isssss gorgeous!!!❤😊 that's what I kept saying what people say about you is nonnnnneee of your business people have an opinion. Sooooo what.
Say it louder for the people in the back👏... I'm constantly told by my own family that I need a perm.... or "your hair would be so pretty if you flat iron it!" 🤬 WAKE UP PPL!
I feel you. My family is like that too. Or they say they like it only when it's in a perfectly defined loose twistout. I pay them no mind, my hair is flourishing. Yours is too!
Thanku for this video. I have giant poofy hair and I got teased for it when I was younger so now I am too embarrassed to wear it out so I put in in a bun or a braid. I still have a long way to go in regards to loving it, but I might consider wearing it out during the summer when it’s warmer out.
“What other people say or think about you, is none of your business.” I love that
I actually did a rewind to listen to that again. I think that's going to be something that I keep with me for life.
Yes! That wisdom has been around for a decades and will always ring true. Especially the older you get.
"Just because someone didn't see your worth doesn't mean you're not worth it!"
I’m 16 and I was so happy finding your page. I always felt like 💩 about my hair because as a lightskin Black person, there is this ignorant texture you’re expected to have. Really refreshing seeing someone who looks like me!! Keep doing you sis!
Same! I found her channel like 5 months ago and i stayed for the same reason! ❤️
Sammmme
I get you. A hair stylist who wasn't even my own wanted to touch my hair and said you got the skin in the eyes but you didn't get the hair! How insulting! I've got the hair in the texture that God intended!
@@sable7114 sorry you had to deal with that, my heart goes out to brown skin women who have to deal with Texturism AND colorism. Next time, you have the right to ask them “what do you mean by that” and they will be stuck. So ignorant ppl think a skin color implies a certain “look” you know?
@@BurningheartofSILVER ❤️❤️
I’m a Black male and I’ve sometimes felt down about my hair texture, but watching this has been a great boost of morale. You spoke nothing but facts!!!
She's beyond beautiful
I refer to natural hair as challenging but versatile. It can be worn in ANY style. We have so many options. Embrace it!
And I was chatting with a guy from India to tell me he doesn't like afro hair and he prefers straight hair. I educated him on afro hair and then told him I was no longer interested.✌🏾
I've honestly never understood how anyone can dislike any particular hair type. There are women all over the planet, of every ethnicity and culture, who have gorgeous hair. What they all have in common isn't the texture or color of their hair, but time and energy they put into getting it healthy and keeping it that way. That, and a healthy dose of self love make the perfect recipe for beautiful hair. Love yourself and take care of yourself, and you will have beautiful hair. Period.
I loved this video. As a biracial 16 year old girl with low porosity and type 4c hair, growing up in an all white household and a predominantly white area hasn’t been the easiest when it came to my looks. I wasn’t taught to do anything with my hair, so its an afro all the time because thats just how it grows (with the weekly wash routine of course). A lot of adults scold me for it, which is a shame. And for awhile I thought the same, but I wouldn’t trade my hair for anything in the world. I might have not been blessed with the plump lips of a black woman, but at least this luscious ball of floof makes up for it! 😅 My crown has a mind of her own, but instead of trying to fit her into this box and suffocate her with products, I’ve learned to replenish and nourish her. I give my hair what it needs, and in return it makes sure the sun doesn’t fry my scalp off (and that I look good too).
Other people’s beauty standards are not my problem, and our individuality needs to be praised more often by ourselves; because unfortunately, there is no guarantee that people will accept us as the unique individuals we all are
❤
“American culture is basically black culture at this point” 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 SAY IT AGAINNN!! It’s annoying that people never want to acknowledge what black people have contributed. When we talk about box braids or rap and people say that “no one owns box braids or rap”... but we made it tho but its easy to discredit than credit. Society has excluded black people but loved to imitate the culture..anyways Dang Joy el 😭😭I felt so attacked because it was like you were speaking directly at me. I loved everything about this video because I definitely agree and I love your hair and you inspire me to learn about my hair
This video is spot on! "Everything in American culture was taken from the Black community." Drop the mike!
See yourself the way Christ does.... He died for you and me and we were created for Him. I just learned that last week..
AMEN!
Preach girlfriend! I’m 48 and have always loved my hair. It never occurred to me not to. It’s part of who I am. I don’t want straight hair, wavy hair, 4A hair, etc. I’m 4C and ❤️every coil, kink and even fairy knots.
Same!! Minus fairy knots - those are some troublesome beasts!
Wow, can I just say that you are very beautiful. I thought you were on your 20s. 😍😍😍
my white boyfriend told me that my natural hair is more beautiful than the straight wig I wear. I love him so much. 😭😭
Mine thinks so too. He says it suits me best and Im the cutest that way🤭🥰 so Ill put the blowdrier and flat iron away a lot more
You should!
@@aprilmason1616 i think what matters is what you like yourself, not your boyfriend.
“Grow a pair of ovaries” 😂 I literally love you. You’re the reason I went natural girl!
Well said. I came to love my hair by setting 2 rules for my journey. 1. Hair must always be clean, moisturised 2. Low maintenance. I find the natural hair community is obsessed with “long” hair (which in itself is a European standard of beauty) and excessive product buying . So I tend to just avoid the natural hair community and do my own thing.
A lot of us are not just natural for our hair, but natural for the environment and animals. A whole lifestyle of trying to clean up our practices. Those are expensive, fair trade and eco be like that.
I disagree with long *natural* hair being a European standard.
I don’t think it’s just European idk where people got that from, but a lot of cultures praise and parade long hair. Short hair is still beautiful but long hair isn’t a European thing.
@@soph3378 I say European because I live as a minority in their culture. But it doesn’t change the fact that our hair is different to every other race. Every other race has hair that grows down wards therefore is long. Our hair grows up therefore should be referred to as tall, it shrinks etc everything about the nature of our hair is anything but long and flowing. Yet we still use that language and we still obsess about long hair. Just explaining my thoughts 💭 obviously everyone is entitled to their own
While I agree that excessive stretching and manipulation can be problematic, Europeans are not the only ones who can grow long hair. Yes, shrinkage must be embraced to cultivate a healthy head of hair. But, at the same time, I personally consider the effort to grow healthy hair and retain length to be a form of self-care! This isn't like wanting to change fixed physical traits such as complexion or nose width. With love and care, even an afro will get bigger hence "longer", right? I have seen more women, myself included, become much more mindful about diet and exercise once embracing a natural hair journey because I truly feel our hair is a direct reflection of our well-being. But again, just my opinions and you're of course entitled to yours. Sending peace and love!
I stopped comparing my hair to looser hair types. Now it’s ok if my 4c wash n go doesn’t look like a 3c wash n go, it’s ok if my twist out/braid out doesn’t look like a 4a twist out/braid out or that my hair shrinks way more or that my current length doesn’t hang down. That is my hair type and that is ok 😊
I need your pep talks monthly please 🥺❤️
Replay the video then lol
Ladies I am a man and I love you for who you are. Also, God wants you to be natural.
I agree, 100000%! :)
The struggle is real, I am not giving up. I haven't had a relaxer in 19 years but I decided to stop blow drying and flat ironing in September.
When you really embrace your hair and learn to appreciate it for what it is, that’s when it gets fun.
Today I had some kind of a nervous breakdown and I started to cutting my hair out of frustration. I felt defeated, weak and I was so embarrassed but I took myself to a hairdresser nearby and they made some "bob a like" haircut out of the mess I've created. With that being said, I have naturally straight/ wavy hair and for the first time, having my hair this short I kinda like it. I will start embracing my hair and give myself a break from years of heatstyling my hair. Even though I don't have naturally curly, kinky hair I truly found this video to be so empowering and a breath of fresh air. You are truly beautiful and this was exactly what i needed, thank you.
much love from Sweden
Det ordnar sig, du e älskad!
I have type 4a/b hair. I used to not like my hair and eventually damaged it because I straightened it daily. Then one day, I decided to transition. I've been natural for like 5yrs now and it was one of the very few best decisions I've made in my life lol. My hair is flourishing, it's the longest it's ever been and I'm OBSESSED with it.
My suggestion for anyone struggling with embracing their natural hair is to:
1) As you said Joel, stop talking negatively about your hair it's beautiful trust me!!
2) Treat your hair like the finest silk there is. Make your wash/styling days a self care sesh. Don't do it when you're already stressed/upset or else you'll take it out on your hair and hurt her (her as in your hair) and yourself. 🥺
3. Don't complicate your hair routine!!! I'm the laziest natural there is and my hair is almost down to my hips! All I do is wash once every two weeks, deep condition EVERY time I wash, then moisturise. And if I style I mostly do wash and go's or braid outs and I don't obsessed over curl definition. I don't have that much hair to have every curl poppin so I embrace my frizz. That's also less manipulation. I also keep my hair under wigs during the winter as a break from manipulation. Couture (my hair's name) is currently hibernating atm.
Hopefully, these steps will help you realize how lucky you are to have the texture you have. And in return your hair will flourish and you will fall in love with it day by day! ☺️💖👩🏽🦱
Beautiful advice ❤️❤️ I want to make my wash day less complicated most definitely
YOU AND STAR PUPPY
I swear I literally just was making lovvvve to my hair as I was conditioning it earlier and making sure I was speaking and thinking only good thoughts about. That’s how we can grow truly healthy natural hair 🤍 I’m learning to love my hair which had been so hard but I’m hopeful 🤞🏾
Jokes! Thought I was the only one! Wash day I put my music on and fully focus on her. When putting my conditioner on I'm telling her how well she's doing, how proud I am of her, how I promise to look after her and thank God for blessing me with her. And do you know something?...she talks back!
I shed a man tear watching this. Love this. Peace :)
I had to be patient with my hair. I also tell other naturals stop talking negatively about your hair. Your hair feels that negativity. This is you in naked form. It’s beautiful. We’re Unique.
I have straight hair. I'm white. But I've always wished that I had curls. I think your hair is so beautiful and if I could have it for just one day I'd be the happiest person. But I never will and that's ok. I've always been told that I have the "ideal" hair and that's always made me cringe because curls, coils....that's what I find beautiful. I wish black women woudnt put their hair down because it's one of the many things I find the most beautiful about you. (Btw I'm a hairdresser and my name's Becky 🤣🤣😂)
I would have to tell people the 'bad part' of having hair texture like mine because ALL I heard was you have such "good hair" "If I had your hair I wound" & I felt like I had to feel bad because I had the hair God gave me.
I started saying "What would you do with my hair? You go to the hairdresser, get your hair done and it stays in that style for almost 2 weeks. I go to the hairdresser, get my hair done, go to bed and my hairstyle is MESSED UP! $50-$60 down the drain. SO ... THAT'S what you'd do IF YOU HAD MY HAIR"
OAN: There's NO 'GOOD hair, BAD hair' everyone's hair is beautiful!
I still hear it now & then but not as much as I did in high-school & college but I still correct it when I hear it.
As you said - we ALL have unique beautiful hair unique to each of our bodies 💯😁
Girl.....GIRRRRL!!!!! I Don't even have anything to say except AMAZING 👏👏👏👏💖💖🎊🎊🥳🥳🥰🥰😭😭😇😇😭😭🥰🥰🎊🥳👏👏👏🥰😭💖💖😇😇👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏😎😎👏💖😎😎😎👏💖😎😎😎👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏😍😘 I Just love you SO DANG much ❤
I love my hair, but it took yeeeears. I'm in mid age and finding joy and peace with who you are is one of the blessings of getting older. No matter what your age, it takes courage to truly be yourself just as you are. Love Yourself ❤
I love my natural hair! I had a hard time dealing with when it was extremely short. Now that my fro has grown to pass at least my ear when I stretch it out on the side. It took a year for me to get to this point of having somewhat of a regimen. My hair is the thickest, prettiest and softest it's ever been. Also, I love the jewelry show! I am a brutally honest teacher and warehouse worker. Recently, at home and work, I have had some fallouts about it.
You saying that our hair is the most unique made me SO unbelievably happy. Thank u so much for this video, I have very similar hair to yours but your hair is longer than mine and I always compare my hair length to yours and make myself feel bad. But I should love my hair as it is because it’s great ❤️
My God! Where was this girl when I was in my twenties! I am just now learning to love my hair and I am 40+...
I had duck lips and ant butt and 4b/c first! 🙋🏾♀️
I have to watch Joyel videos whenever I'm feeling bad about my Hair
This made me cry tears of joy us black women are the blueprint!!!
You are right! I always talk negatively about my hair. I have 4C hair and I've been relaxer free since spring 2019 and 100% natural since my big chop in June. I'm still not at the point where I love my hair, but I'm hoping I'll get there.
Love the jewerly! When people are negative when it comes to what God gave them shows no appreciation! He gave us what He wanted each individual to have!! We have been so blinded by what society think what our hair should look and feel like! I love my 4c kinky curly hair!! Thanks for giving the encouragement!!
I really Needed to see this right now.. I just took out my Brazilian bundles and I looked in the mirror and cried because I felt ugly.. but your really giving me the confidence to just wear it out... Thankyou joy❤️
She talking spicy! I'm here for it.
My five year old literally messages my head and he says he loves my natural hair. He asked me why I put my hair in braids when I can just wear my natural hair. He is so smart.
You have a very beautiful spirit, Joy-el. Protect your energy. ❤️🧿
Thank you Joyel, this was empowering. Everything you said not only applies to hair but to just about every aspect of life. Honorable mention to "grow a set of ovaries" and "what other people think about you is none of your business"
This is why you are one of my favorite youtubers 🥺 this video is now gonna help me with more than my hair (well-being in general) THANK YOU JOY-EL🥰❤️ time to get outta bed
I really needed this thank you so much Joel. Sometimes when I see girls with long straight hair or even long 4C hair I get so upset about mine because it’s not that long (SHRINKAGE IS SO REAL) and honestly sometimes I wish that I had straight hair. Shirt 4C hair isn’t seen as desirable and that’s so sad. I think my hair is beautiful when I wash it and it’s moisturised but honestly I don’t really know how to take care of it. I used to constantly but it in box braids because I didn’t want to take care of it and I used to pray to God that I would have the courage to wear my natural hair. But even I wasn’t really taking care of it. It’s been so difficult to know which products work for me. I hope to find those products one day. I appreciate you and your channel and seeing your progress. You are have a huge light❤️❤️❤️
Deep condition. Keep your hair moisturized between wash days. The products you use to maintain moisture may differ depending on your hair style and how long you go between wash days. I keep my hair twisted in small-ish twists, even during wash days. I wash every 2 weeks. I don't use heavy butters because they seal moisture too well and don't allow enough moisture in when I want to spritz it. I stick to oils and medium/light creams and reapply when needed. If you wash weekly, you can use heavier butters. I'd be careful with adding hair as the weight will pull your hair out too. I'd also suggest looking into ayurvedic treatments.
I needed this pep talk. Lately I’ve been feeling so frustrated with my hair and wishing I had a looser curl pattern so that my hair would behave better. I spent hours detangling, deep conditioning, using heat to make it penetrate, moisturizing and stretching my hair, wear a silk bonnet to bed everyday and sleep on silk pillows. Here I am 2 days later after wash day and my hair feels dry as hell. Plus, I’m drinking 2.5 litres of water a day and taking supplements. I just don’t know what I’m doing wrong 😪
I feel like you're talking directly to me 😭😭😢
I feel like me finally taking time to learn my natural hair was the first step I took in self-love. 3 years of trial and error turned my hair into my crown and just like that all these years of self-hate disappeared. Learning to adore my natural hair helped me to love me and anytime one of my friends come to me and say they want to transition I am 100% there with all the tips and support. I remember I had no support system and a lot of my friends complain about going through the same lack of support so I love being that one person in their corner. So in a lot of ways I relate to this video, I love to see my loves in their embracing their kinks, coils and curls. It's such a struggle but when the war is won, there is nothing that can stop that empowerment one gets from the self-love❤
Bwahaahaa 😂😂😂 duck lips and ant butts!!! Oh ma gaaaaaaahhh I love you girl!!
Exactly!!! Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one, and some are shittier than others. Ijs.
. I'm 5 years into my natural hair journey and I had so many moments where I almost gave up or was scared to wear my hair the way God made it out of fear of judgement in the work place. It's so hard to look in the mirror and accept yourself sometimes but I had to practice telling myself that I am beautiful just like you said to get over that. I'm much more confident now but I still have my moments where I am learning to love myself. Everything you said is inspirational.
this message is powerful, and I applaud you for bringing it to us. I just did a big loc chop, and now have a twa, my fiance said he likes big afros, I thought about his comment for a few days then told him to apologize for that comment, he said he didn't say it. Pissed me off so much. I have been natural nearly all of my life, and I love my hair and my color. Thank God for this powerful message.
Sharmaine, I have followed your natural hair journey since your big chop and you are one of the persons who inspired my big chop from relaxed hair at the end of March 2019. I hated my relaxed hair because it was thin and I always experienced breakage which prevented my hair from growing beyond shoulder length. I love my natural low to medium density hair. It is not fast growing as I am only at 9 to 10 inches in length at this point but it is the healthiest my hair has been in years. I love shrinkage because it gives my hair the appearance of volume. My insecurity was in regard to my grays. I stopped coloring my hair in March 2020 because I made the decision to embrace my grays. Now I feel totally liberated. Thank you Sharmaine for this powerful video. I pray for your continued growth and success. Much blessings and love to you. As always, you know I have to express my love for your hair. Just gorgeous!😍😘💕
Preach Joy-el! The natural hair journey isn’t easy as you said, but you can definitely get there. When I started growing my hair natural it was very difficult, there are so many things that can get in your way to stop you from loving your own hair but here I am. I’ve been growing my 4b/4c hair for almost 3 years and now I love it so much, I can see the beauty in it. Guys, do never give up! It’s very satisfying to see how far you’ve reached later ❤️
Wow! A much needed video! This is why I love embracing my Divine Fro 🥰💫👑
Beautifully said joyel! Yeah I dated a guy like that, the relaxer couldn't even get my hair straight enough for him so I figured it's not me that you want and you're not paying for these hair stylist appointments. Why did I even try? Beautiful jewelry as well. In case you don't have another video out before Thanksgiving, have a Happy Thanksgiving! Everyone be safe!
Tell em! It doesn't matter what type of hair you have it can always be improved. Love works wonders!
men love my natural hair. i go for the ones who love me how i am
Girl yes you will respect us.
I know you are speaking from experience your words are inspiring
Hey girl, I know its only been a week since you posted but we miss you. Hope you're well. X
NO BUT I WAS JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS EARLIER!! ugh!
I needed to hear this and so did others joyel your my role model you have so much confidence i have 4c hair and people call it nappy but at the end of the days I still learn how to love my hair
I’m trying. It’s hard starting again with this hair, but I’m trying to embrace it as my super power. You go girl.💜💜
You are such a beautiful soul. Keep inspiring. Our young ones, your peers, really need to hear this message. Thank you!
I’ve been natural for 9 years and I love it!!!!! 4c hair texture all my LIFE
thank you🥺❤️I really did need this since everyone else in my family has 2-3type curls or relaxed hair and whenever I try to wear my natural fro they just see it as messy and “unkempt”
needed this bae appreciate u
My Lord, this girl is a miracle and living legend! God Bless you! xx The beauty of her intellect and soul is outstanding! May you always be triumphant!
I agree with all, just if some say “i like you but i dont like your natural hair”, its just one opinion. I think if really having self love that person can take every opinion and not attact it to own self
Yes positive hair affirmations ❤️❤️❤️
You have the power to block out negative energy do not entertain it. Powerful
Thank you for being you and sharing you with us. I’ve never been able to relate to someone like I do you and I would love to thank you for that. thank you for showing the ups and the downs and being real. Thank you for wearing your hair and showing us, thank you for everything. You are amazing and so so valued.
AND your stunning, as I watched I started to fall in love with your beauty.
Excellent video! Excellent message! It takes me out every time you’ve said duck lips and ant butts😹🤣😂 Everything was true, they want what makes us us. I’ve seen those video of the folks in Asia getting stuff done to get texture. It’s absolutely crazy but then the moment water hits it back to flat😹 Great Great video💚
Yass preach sista💪🏿 I needed to hear this🌸
I must say, I realize my hair loves rice water as pre poo...for me its game changer..perfect balance of conditioning and strength for my high porosity hair. I keep rubberbanded at the root, then twist and braids.
Careful with those rubber bands, they can break your hair at the root.
@@stephpowell7648 thanks, I add oil to the bands.
Be careful with rice water frequently . It eorks wonders in beginning after a while damages your hair
YEEEEESSSSSSS! Thank you so much for doing this video! Nothing but FACTS! I just shared it with my Daughter! Told her to listen to it daily. I so appreciate all you do and this video couldn't have been created at a better time! Thank you speaking Truth!!!!! Well said and done.
Peace and love!
Joy-el thanks I really needed this i have 4c hair and people call it nappy your my role model you should try coco black naturals new hair products I seen them on Facebook and they had type 4 coils poppin
I love that your shrinkage is longer than mine stretched. Still, my hair is awesome!
I love seeing your videos love the pep talk ones the MOST!! I'm still letting my hair grow out and I'm happy with my choice. It is strange that we get so many ppl that wanna touch it or they are like omg your gonna let it grow out... Your right our hair is unique we must flaunt lol
YES! Oh my gawsh, I LOVE YOU! Your message is empowering and amazing! If you get just one person to embrace who they are, then you have done something profound. We have ALWAYS added swag to EVERYTHING, we can turn water into swag! Ha! “Love yourself first”. Very good. Keep up the good work. 😁 Our hair IS beautiful!!!! ❤️
Thanks for the video, I been on and off with the way I feel, I always say it's love and hate feeling with my hair but I want change that & your so right this is your hair & you should love & except everything about you.🥰 Thank you btw Great video!!
Your natural hair is gorgeous. Beautiful
I love all of my hair! Even my curly eyebrows 🥰🥰🥰🥰
Love your bravery, so inspiring! I needed to hear this. I need to watch this video right before I try to do my hair. Love your strength.
I FELT THIS 💕💕💕💕Agree with everything you said😊😊😊
You’re so gorgeous ♥️♥️
I'm so glad I ran across you the other day. We have similar hair, but mine is way way shorter. Your piece about depression was just great. New Subby
10 secs in.. Just on video title had to give it a like. This is really awesome content. I know some teens who could really benefit from this video. God bless you, Joyel👏🏾
Thank u for the pep talk!! It was exactly what I needed when I looked in the mirror today!
Everything you said is so true. I needed to hear this. I'm sitting here with the same hairstyle as you.
Why born to fit in when you can be born to stand out 🤷🏽♀️
💜 I agree with you 100%💜👌🏾very much needed, you're Beautiful,Amazing Wise!!!Yass Guurl👐🏽
Thanks for this amazing video ! I Have been on this journey for more than 5 years and its tough , but I love my hair so much. I keep my consistent hair care routines no matter what .
thank you again and good luck !
Amen sister!
i needed to hear this bc i've been so frustrated with my hair. thank you queen!
YOU ARE FREAKIN GORGEOUS!! KEEP ROCKIN ON CHIC!!!😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰
This is pure Gold
Definitely don't talk negatively about your hair. Trust it impacts how you see yourself. Trust kinky hair isssss gorgeous!!!❤😊 that's what I kept saying what people say about you is nonnnnneee of your business people have an opinion. Sooooo what.
Say it louder for the people in the back👏... I'm constantly told by my own family that I need a perm.... or "your hair would be so pretty if you flat iron it!" 🤬 WAKE UP PPL!
I feel you. My family is like that too. Or they say they like it only when it's in a perfectly defined loose twistout. I pay them no mind, my hair is flourishing. Yours is too!
Thanku for this video. I have giant poofy hair and I got teased for it when I was younger so now I am too embarrassed to wear it out so I put in in a bun or a braid. I still have a long way to go in regards to loving it, but I might consider wearing it out during the summer when it’s warmer out.
Look at all of that thick beautiful hair