Hi! I need to clarify that Rachel never once asked me to make this video. I asked for her permission to make a public apology because I was getting comments about it and wanted to come clean to my channel. She took a huge risk by allowing me to make this. Yes, this vid exposes me, but it also exposes her and her private life to scrutiny and judgment that she did not ask for. Any hate, judgment, or negativity sent her way needs to stop now. This happened between May to September of 2017. I came forward and apologized to Rachel in December of 2017. People are saying that I revealed private info like addresses, places of work, phone numbers, info about her family members, etc. I would *never* expose where someone lives or anything mentioned above. Her address, workplace - anything other than the name of her boyfriend - was never posted or even hinted at anywhere by anyone. Rachel would corroborate that. After seeing photos she posted of her boyfriend, I posted my guess of who he was (I was not positive at the time). I never contacted her directly (like sending harassing messages, etc). I only spoke back and forth between her friend and others on a gossip forum. -- I’m adding this because of new comments and messages I'm receiving. Rachel and I worked on this video together - she saw previous recordings and asked for edits and specific things to be added which I did without question. I only published this take when I got her blessing. I did and still do sincerely apologize. I left out specifics in this vid because I didnt know how detailed I should be - this is personal to Rachel. I truly wish her healing, as I have for the past years. I think we are both in much brighter places in our lives now and hope we can continue into bright futures. Thanks always.
@Patrick Starsponge The only one not moving on is you, Patrick. I deleted your previous comment judging Rachel but you still came back for more. Please drop it.
I blocked her number over three years ago when we had an argument and she didnt realize it until now. We had been communicating via Instagram this entire time, I don't know why she suddenly switched from that. She was never blocked anywhere else so I'm not sure why she started telling people she couldn't talk to me. She obviously wasn't blocked on Instagram where I was messaging her. I reached out to her again and explained the misunderstanding and assured her I didn’t do anything to block our conversations in the past 3 years. It was just a miscommunication but we cleared it up privately.
@@SJ-hk7kc well as far as I'm aware many people who are anonymous on the internet are able to make such mistakes without anyone realising. I am not saying this is a small mistake, but being a public figure means your mistakes become public.
@@SJ-hk7kc as if humans were I inherently good. There aren't "good people limits", everyone has done something they feel ashamed of and regret it. With this mindset, one day you could make a horrible mistake and believe that yourself are not worth forgiveness
Rachel just posted on her instagram stories "It takes a lot of courage to apologize and I respect that. I'm happy that we can both close this chapter together ❤" Just as it's not our place to forgive on Rachel's behalf, it's not our place to deal out retribution on her behalf. The injured party wants to move on and we should respect that too.
This situation has just reminded me to do better at separating myself emotionally from the youtubers and creators I watch and support. I’ll continue to enjoy and seek comfort in their content, but I won’t presume to know them and I certainly won’t denigrate myself by comparing my life to theirs. Things go on that we have no idea about. Sometimes they come out and sometimes they don’t, but there’ll always be so much we don’t know about the people we watch online. It was really brave of you to confront this head on Cari and I hope you’re looking after yourself. As hard as that behaviour is to reconcile with the impression I’ve always had of you, I do want to believe that each of us is more than the worst thing we’ve ever done.
I can agree,I always tend to compare myself to youtubers and how I can make myself better ,this made me realize I know nothing about the influencers I’m comparing myself to . (Oof my grammar sucks )
@Badet GB Because she’s clearly still suffering from the repercussions of what Cari did. Even if she accepted Cari’s apology she still has every right to talk about what happened to her as it obviously was an extremely traumatic time for her - she had to delete her youtube account and has said that she’s too scared to ever go back on it again. That, to me, shows that she is still dealing with the trauma of what happened and neither you nor I have any right to comment on how she chooses to process or talk about it.
@@bethgrayson6688 I agree, we have no idea what she went through and I am not downplaying it, I just wish she did a more mature way of telling her story as making it funny (actually kind of revengeful to me) will result to cyberbulling Cari which is not helpful as well
@@badetgb1446 She has every right to deal with the situation however she wants. Maybe making a funny video is just her way of being able to confront her trauma. We have no right to dictate how she does that, and there is no point defending Cari right now when Cari herself has admitted all blame. I agree that this whole situation may result in some people cyberbullying Cari now, which I absolutely do not agree with and don't think Cari deserves that, but if anyone does end up bullying her now then the blame lies only with those people, not with Rachel.
@@bethgrayson6688 Are you replying to my comment? If so, I never said that she shouldn't make a video on it. All I said was that people in the comments shouldn't be accepting the apology/saying "it's ok", only Rachel should.
Cari’s post from tumblr: I want to talk about feeling distanced from a part of yourself, or rather separating a toxic part of yourself and convincing yourself it’s not really you. I don’t want to seem like I’m trying to play the victim here at all. I was faced with a challenge and i failed it. I was weak where i very easily could have been strong. I was put into a very uncomfortable work situation where I was the most depressed i have ever been in my life. I had to sit in the kitchen at work because i would just be crying uncontrollably at the office. It was everything from minor sexual assault to not having a bed for 3 months. I was being emotionally abused for 3 months straight by the person who basically controlled my job, my housing, and the opinions of everyone around me. This then continued for many months after that. Because of my depression, the new people I was working with treated me in all different ways. Some were over the top supportive and asking me how i was doing every day tears or no tears, and some were the opposite. By the end of the summer I had lost 20lbs and was trying to figure out how to see a therapist with no american medical insurance. I had to ask my abuser if the company would cover my therapy and his response was ‘you need to make more friends.’ I never got treatment. I came back to Korea with my depression for 6 more months, with the treatment by the new coworkers getting even worse, which in turn made me treat them poorly too. That’s when the toxicity of my personality became clear. Luckily I had my best friend and my boyfriend with me in Korea so I wasnt facing it alone, but my depression was turning into something much more dangerous. This was the first time in my life I had met people that unapologetically made me feel horrible and openly ignored or belittled me and my defense mechanism was to try to do the exact same back which, doesn’t work. During this time I also had an infection that almost cost me my kidney, they’re both permanently scarred. I didn’t go to the hospital early on because I didn’t want to miss work and give my abuser an excuse to scold me. Later I needed surgery. The coworkers were taken out of my life without much closure, but the anger in my heart was still there. It was like a bad break up where I check up on their instagrams not knowing what I’m looking for. Do I want them to be unhappy? Do I want them to be happy? I dont know and its unhealthy. My depression significantly lifted nearly simultaneously with me not having to deal to those people and after I started RUclips I was so happy! My best friend had just moved away so I was suddenly missing a huge piece of my life. RUclips was something that was motivating me to leave my house and the comment section was where I had most of my human interaction. Looking back on it now, I was much lonelier than I would ever admit to myself. As for my boyfriend, youtube was like my own little world so we never talked about it and it felt very private and very mine. He is always a shining light for me, but only recently did i let him into this part of my life. Though I thought my depression had left me alone, something happened that proved I was wrong. I had done something that was misunderstood, and it was the first feeling of being attacked that I’ve had since the time I was depressed. This misunderstanding caused someone to do something so small and so petty that it shouldnt have bothered me, and writing it here seems so stupid, but it really hurt me. My best friend had left, i had started this new fun creative adventure and every time i logged in i would be met with a small gesture of hate. To them it probably felt like nothing, and looking back on it I should definitely have been able to handle it, but at the time it felt like i had made these special paintings and every day i’d find someone poured a bucket of red paint over each and every one of them. It really sounds so dramatic but I was (or maybe still am) emotionally weak from basically 2 years of emotional abuse and it got deep under my skin. Everything about this situation was so petty that I didnt want to talk to anyone about it, so I buried it. Then I gave up. It was like someone kept picking on my scab i was trying to ignore and i took the bait. I got angry and acted out, but it was worse because i had the internet and i could be anonymous. And my actions hurt people. I hurt people. And i can never undo what i did or excuse why i did it. The scariest thing about this was, i was able to completely separate the me that was mean in this one space online, from who i was “in real life.” That person i was being was the opposite of the morals and standards i hold myself to “in real life” even though so much of what i consider my “real life” is online. This is where im going to get confusing because to be honest im still confused. There was a part of me that felt satisfaction seeing people agree with some mean thing I wrote online at the same time i’d feel totally ashamed and guilty and i couldnt sleep because of what i did. I know i seem really positive and happy and like a supportive friend and i am, but there was a small part of me that wasn’t or still isnt, i guess, because i know even though im suppressing it, its still there. What was most unhealthy is that i was so sure it was just an internet persona that i didnt consider it to be a part of myself. The person you see on youtube or tumblr or instagram is honestly who i am, its not a fake personality i put on, thats genuinely how i am if you were to meet me on the street. But i refused to accept that that isnt completely me. There’s that 1% of me that is a person i loathe, that im ashamed of, that i wanted to stop being, but part of it felt like such a release to play that role. I was so ashamed of myself that i couldnt tell anyone. Even my friends that i really trust, it was such a private thing that it almost felt like it was part of another world. Not the reality i lived in. again, confusing but thats just how i felt and honestly still feel a little bit. I didnt want to tell people about it because i didnt want them to think that was who i am, but really it was just i didnt want to admit that that was who i am. Then one day, it really hit me how badly i had behaved. I felt ashamed and i knew i needed help. Luckily i have a friend who is understanding. I had lied to her face many times when it came to this dark side of mine. I knew she needed to know and i trusted she would have the best advice and wouldnt sugar coat things for me. And luckily i was right. She listened, and she held me accountable. Now that i finally let someone in and that someone was able to tell me point blank ‘what you’re doing is wrong and unhealthy’ i felt the ability to come forward to the person I hurt. Whether or not they believe me or accept my apology is out of my hands, but now that I know I told the truth, I can begin to move forward. Now I’m working on figuring out what it was that made me act like that. Why was my reaction to such minor harassment so cowardly? What is it that affected me so strongly? How i behaved makes me feel actually nauseous and I know I will never do that again. I hurt people because i could and thats unacceptable. With online behavior nowadays especially here on tumblr or youtube, its so easy to be someone you arent. But as you act out that persona long enough you have to accept that its not some persona, its you. Its me. I took those thoughts and words from my own mind and put them out there by my own choice. That rude person is a part of me and i need to deal with it. I think having a great support system around you is important and i lost that now that i have such infrequent contact with my friends. So if you’re reading all the way through, perhaps its because you’ve felt something like this to? Maybe not taking advantage of online anonymity but maybe you have a small part of your personality that you’re not proud of, that you separate from your true self. I hope you can accept that that is also you and that we all need to work on that if we ever want to grow. I’m sorry if this is coming out of seemingly nowhere because this is so not my personality, but it is. Its something i am going to deal with and i hope that this inspires anyone else to reflect on some part of themselves they’re ashamed of or distanced from. To accept it as part of you and to grow from it. You cant fix something if you pretend it isnt really there. Im sorry this was vague and i will feel uncomfortable talking about this with anyone that isnt someone that knows the situation so im not going to answer any comments about this but please see this is as my first step in acknowledging and moving forward. Thank you for listening if you’re still here.
@@marissa2075 it definitely helped me. What happened was horrible for Rachel. BUT It also draws the need for easier to access mental health and support for on the job harassment.
@@outdoorsycatlady definitely, hurt people hurt people. What she did wasn't right but seeing what she went through makes me empathize with her a lot. It's just a cycle. When a person is constantly in a toxic situation and can't get help it can be detrimental to their mental health and lash out in ways they normally wouldn't. I think if Cari would have explained what led her to that state people would understand a lot more where she came from, but Cari probably didn't want to come off as an excuse of her behavior and some might have taken it as Cari victimizing herself in order to gain sympathy. Knowing this makes her apology a lot more sincere.
I think people needs to realize that figures on youtubes or ig is not as ideal as they think. I mean, social media only shows the brightest parts of their lives. People are entitled to be disappointed bc of the perfect image that they've built out of Cari, but at the same time, there is no need to say harsh things to her. We can't expect or obligate her or any youtubers to put their darksides online in the first place, since it's where they put on only the highlights of their lives. I think it's only Rachel who can forgive her not any of the viewers. It's their choice for people who's unsuscribing, but they need to see the fact that other youtubers they subscribe is not perfect either. We never know them through internet and it's just natural.
I completely agree with you. When I saw this I get awkward, like who the hell is Rachel, what's happening... WTF is this. RUclipsrs are normal persons with lots of good and bad things like us. I want to give my opinion never never mix personal behaves with the content of your channel. I don't see nothing wrong on this channel, I don't know who is Rachel and I don't care about that person. Those things can't be done. Personal stuff don't bring to youtube please, Korea has lots of drama shows don't create more. Shut this video. Thanks and be happy with your crazy things
Please everyone, don't ever stop caring about your mental health and others you love. It requires almost no courage to hurt someone but it requires immense amount of courage to apologise.
I’m confused. So this situation was resolved privately 3 years ago?? Now, this person is digging it back up..and on a platform asTikTok? I don’t know the other person, obviously so I haven’t seen anything or know the whole story, but I’m wondering why it is being opened back up now? And, I’ll just say this, I’m much older than probably most of Cari’s audience, and I have done some pretty awful things myself throughout my 50+ years. One thing I have learned is NOBODY is perfect. Every single person has hurt someone maybe in a smaller way than this, maybe in a more catastrophic way. But none of us should be all judgy and making silly remarks about how you never know the real person you are seeing online...no kidding! I promise every single person has some skeleton they have tucked away in a closet. Now I don’t know what all of this is about but folks, apologies were made and made again. Other person has graciously accepted them, hard lessons learned now moving along.
I’m probably a lot older than much of your audience (in my 40s), but can I just say as you gain a few decades you realise that everyone is capable of making mistakes, and yes, mistakes that can seriously negatively impact someone else’s life. In fact I’d go so far as to say it’s impossible to lead a life that doesn’t negatively impact on others - the boyfriend you dump in your own best interests, the friend you don’t take time to understand, the coworkers you walk away from, the random strangers that reap the wrath of the day you receive sad news, the loved ones who you strike out at or lean heavily on in fear, the impoverished others (who you’ll never meet or even think of) in other countries who are kept in that state by economic systems you (consciously or otherwise) buy into... The thing that gives us the right to hold our heads high and walk forward, thriving isn’t keeping those things secret, hidden and never engaging with them, it’s facing up to their possibility, taking active control of our choices and knowing there’s rarely a decision that won’t cause someone else trouble, if not hurt... None of us act impeccably. All of us make poor decisions, especially when we are afraid. The only thing you can do is regularly take a look at yourself and ask ‘am I doing the best I can here?’ and try to live by whatever ethics you personally deem appropriate (even clashes in our personal ethics can bring us into direct conflict with others and cause harm). Remember that in any situation there are things you *can* control (and therefore be accountable for) and things you have no control over (like how your actions make someone else feel or react, outside factors that come into play...). People who ask the best of themselves often feel guilt for both the things they can *and cant* control. As you get older these decisions - large and small - get harder and come with bigger stakes... kids or no, you become more responsible for more of other people’s lives (kids, elderly parents, employees, your community, the running of your country, etc). The only way it’s possible to bear the heavy burden of existence is to accept you will make mistakes, and you will try to look inward and do better, and, crucially, giving yourself permission to move on (otherwise you stay in a fear state and leave yourself more open to potentially making mistakes again). I think you’ve been very brave, and I wish you well with your journey in life ❤️
I really liked this comment. I think, as someone a bit older than most of Cari's Audience as well, age helps you see how multi-faceted and complex we are as humans and how we can truly be two personalities at the same time like Jekyll and Hyde. Under the perfect circumstances and pressure, we can all be the worst version of ourselves. It doesn't make the harmful actions we take right or excusable, but creates an experience for us to use as a basis of our empathy when other people let us down.
Hi Cari! I was too one of those people who were completely taken aback when I heard what had happened. I'm confused as to why it shook me as much as it did. I think that in itself is a testament to how much we look up to the people we watch on RUclips weekly. It reminds me of those comments you always get about being aesthetically pleasing and showing us all the beauty around you. We don't know you personally but it feels like we do. If we really took a step back we would acknowledge that we only see snippets. I'm glad that you did this video, I'm glad that you've apologized to Rachel and have been in therapy. We all make mistakes. We all have done things we regret and wish we never did. We, well I, cannot throw rocks at you without looking at my own life and decisions. All of this has been a internal lesson for me as well to look back at moments where I might've hurt someone by my words or actions. All the best Cari. Thanks for taking accountability and I pray that this will be a life lesson for you and for all of us who watch... Our actions and our words can cause damage or can cause healing..
So you scared an innocent woman so bad she left youtube? Now we're expected to continue liking/subscribing? I think I need to take a break from this channel- process this- sorry.
I see a lot of people in the comments saying that Cari is using her poor mental health at that time to excuse what she did, and I think that it’s important for those people to re-watch her video and really listen to what she said. She did not say that her being paranoid was a justification for stalking/bullying Rachel, instead she (in my understanding) was trying to fully explain the circumstances in which she made very bad decisions. Bombarding someone with hate over a situation you’ve just now learnt about but has already been resolved by both parties is a waste of time and a practice of your own poor mental health. And so, leaving comments like “It’s the being a stalker for me” are entirely pointless, and, when looked at closely don’t actually mean much other than you wanting to feel like you’ve taken the high ground on something you view as ‘drama’.
I agree with you. Cari was struggling and because of that she caused irreparable harm to Rachel. She is aware of that and doesn't need people to harass her further. It doesn't help the victim in the situation at all. Instead, we should focus on supporting Rachel and reflect on any personal harm we have caused others.
The “higher ground” part all the way! These people must lead perfect lives the way they pass judgment on others. So easy to do when your dirty laundry isn’t public.
Who would have guessed she'd done that from just watching her vlogs, this is another proof that even the sweetest looking influencers we see on social media can be evil. I am actually really disappointed as I just started watching her content recently and found it interesting, I don't think I will come back to her channel again but I really wish she gets treatment and never harass anyone again whether it is online or in real life.
She says in the video she’s been in counselling for three years... so she did receive treatment. Everyone is acting like they’ve never purposely hurt someone before. Everyone has done something terrible, I guarantee it. Rachel forgives Cari, so why can’t we just put it in the past
What you did was not okay, but you realize it yourself. We should all take a step back and acknowledge this isn't just tea. It is not on any of us to forgive or excuse your actions. What I can appreciate tho is you not putting up a front here. You also could have shut about about this and the victim probably never would have gotten closure. But you didn't. It takes courage and growth for that. Anyways I hope you are in a better space now. Both you and Rachel will need to do a lot of internal work to move on. This might open up new wounds for both of you. I hope you are not too harsh on yourself now. All we can do as humans is to own it up, work on ourselves and never let it happen again
Disappointed is an understatement. Yes people can grow and learn. But the amount of effort you put in to attack someone and their loved ones is disgusting. That means you stayed up late and thought of ways to ruin their life. And you purposefully stayed anonymous until you felt guilty, when she tried to delete videos you even reuploaded them??? Why??? That’s overkill at that point. You even said this came from a place of paranoia so to inflict that purposefully on someone else is painstakingly terrible and you should feel ashamed and lucky there were no legal ramifications. What an intensely immature and ignorant thing to do.
And your comment is also just not nice. Funny how a youtuber cant have flaws yet you an anonymous person feel the need to spew such uncaring comments. 2 years later and this comment still has not aged well!
What a horrible thing to do to someone, I can't even imagine how paranoid Rachel must've felt. I'm sorry but I can't continue to support someone with so much maliciousness in their heart. I hope you really have changed as time has passed since the incident and I wish you good luck on your future personal growth.
I am not shattered by this because I don’t idolize youtubers or “influencers” or celebrities or the like but I’m disappointed. I’m glad you didn’t just ignore this and addressed it but it seems very late and sorta useless now because of how Rachel’s life has been affected. Safety and security are a basic human need and that was taken away from her. I’m glad you are both talking and that she seems to have accepted your apology. Hopefully, Rachel can move forward from this and feel safe again. I hope you are also able to move past this and truly grow from it
Also I want to know why people are so invested in other people’s drama lol like I think it’s awesome that cari is gaining help and apologized to this Rachel girl and Rachel forgave her. Because at the end of the day it’s between them only, they know the whole story because we only know glimpses of it. So I wish people would stop acting like psychologists on this matter.
Nala D I understand lol but I don’t know exactly what she did and I’m not going to figure it out. Because like I said it’s between them, I don’t know the full story, everyone spreading false information at this point. But Rachel forgave her, so why hype it more than it needs to be? I’m glad cari is taking the steps she needs to help her mental state that she dealt with at the time though. Not a lot of people acknowledge their faults. So good for her. And I’m not forcing anything. You see how you commented full of anxiety? Relax.
gm lee yes as a psychology major in grad school, I do think she needs to acknowledge her faults. I think EVERYONE should acknowledge their faults but not everyone does. I don’t care about the apology video, this isn’t about us. She’s human and went through stuff she has overcome, she apologized to Rachel and they are working it out together. They are both finding the steps to heal from this and cari is talking to someone about her mental health issues (that everyone has). For some reason mental health and improvement is disconnected for a lot of people, in order to become a better you, you have to acknowledge what you did and work from it. Every single person on this planet have done something hurtful or something they regret but being able to admit it is very hard but it’s the most important. Humans are not perfect but learning from these mistakes is what will help society, but unfortunately not everyone owns up to their mistakes or seeks help for their mental health issues. Also, people who do acknowledge their faults and/or seek help are look down upon and criticized for trying to improve themselves, such as this situation here.
gm lee I’m not defending her and I’m not saying Rachel is at fault either? Do you see how you are conjuring up something inside your mind? This isn’t about defending and picking sides. This is about actual facts within mental health. That is my point, nothing more, nothing less. This is between them and they are okay with each other, why are you trying to start something that has absolutely nothing to do with you. If Rachel forgave cari than that’s ALL that matters. I don’t care about whether people are picking sides or acting if they are educated on this matter, when they are not. And if you don’t want to watch her videos than don’t? Simple.
no one is actually the same as they were 3 years ago or even one year ago, so don't shame anyone from both sides, she came out to make an apology but remember that this was for Rachel mainly, the apology is not completely ours to forgive, and from hearing this it kinda looks like Rachel wants to just forget it and come to terms with it, so to the ones throwing hate to both of them, please respect their privacy, give advice or constructive criticism to them from a distance. we all need to check ourselves
@vandb hope What is the purpose of this statement? Did you really think that necessary? What's your game? With this attitude, you only prove you're not better that what Cari did in the past. And you seem to want, with greed and under a fake justice disguise, to perpetuate the circle of harassement that none of those two woman want. Comments in this space here seems (miraculously) really pragmatic and well built, with wisdom and fineness/subtlety analysis of the situation, even if all of thoses people do not agree. Take a step back, please, really. Cause this situation is complex and should not be approch with a binary vision, this do not help. (sorry for my bad english, i'm french and not fluent.)
This was the right thing to do. Acknowledging that doesn't praise cari for apologizing, it encourages healthy behavior which is much needed in today's toxic social media environment. Admitting that you have a problem and are actively working on it instead of choosing to continue hurting others is an important part of the process. Over half the people on here wouldn't have the guts to hold themselves accountable, especially in a public setting. I hope everyone involved can heal from this. I wish you luck on your journey to finding inner peace, I'll be sticking around. Keep working on you 💜
Very surprised to hear you say you've done such a thing, I would never have imagined you could ever act like that, so not in keeping with how you come across in your videos. I think that shows you've grown and changed from whoever that was who hurt the other party in such a manner. If she has forgiven you, then forgive yourself and don't beat yourself up for it anymore. Take care!
Long-term viewer here. I also watched DearSeoul before she quit. This came as a huge shock to me. It's definitely not something I can picture coming from you. But I know where you're coming from here, because I too destroyed someone's life via cyberbullying and art theft for an entire 3-4 years straight when I was a teenager (I'm 28 now, we sorted it out between us, but I think about her often and wonder just how damaged she is because of what I did. She didn't really fully forgive me, and my actions will haunt me for the rest of my life). I had a strange obsession with her and wanted to be exactly like her, because myself had ZERO self esteem or sense of identity (still don't really). I'm open about it because I know that sometimes we as humans just do some really stupid ass shit, but we are all capable of growing and being better. It just sucks when our 'stupid ass shit' ends up traumatizing someone else. I'm glad that you've apologized and seems like you've worked it out with Rachel which is all you can really do. I hope over time you're able to forgive yourself and move past it, and I hope those affected will be able to too.
I have been always scared of following people on the internet because we never actually see the true person. But I'm glad that you did this video and I hope you won't make the same mistake again (I hope this doesn't sound rude because it's not my intention). I'm proud of you for working on yourself and I'm pretty sure everyone will keep supporting you :') Be strong!
Mental state cannot be an excuse for any harm you inflict on others. A proper apology should be done without throwing “that mental health excuse” under the bus.
This is in response to the audience’s reaction (“you’re not who you portray on RUclips”) more so than a response to cari’s apology. No one can really speak for her or for Rachel: It is important to remember that every person is both good and bad simultaneously . No person is just one or the other. That does not mean that their “bad” actions are justified or that their “good” actions are simplified. It simply means that we must hold ourselves accountable for the personas we project onto the people (including creators/influencers) we consider into our daily lives. As others have said, it is not up to cari’s audience to forgive her, but it also not up to them to crucify her either, especially if the victim (Rachel) is publicly stating that they wish to move on from this chapter in their lives. Yes we are viewers and our views monetize the lives of these creators, but they do not owe us anything as human beings. It is amazing that we as humans have created these virtual platforms in which we hold people accountable for every millimeter of their actions, and then we create a counter culture (cancel culture) as a response to what we’ve created. Everyone has a right to feel what they feel in response to any given situation, but as we process those emotions and feelings it is important to acknowledge how those feelings are influenced by the false (or misguided) perceptions/personas we have projected onto others.
It’s impossible to live a life without making a single mistake. Like you said, that mistake won’t instantly define you as a “bad” person, but your good deeds won’t justify the mistake either. The only thing you can do, is to take accountability and continue to learn from your mistakes. It’s up to the individual to do this, not the viewers. It’s not up to us to decide who deserves support and who doesn’t, who’s wrong etc. When both parties want to move on, and have cooperated in this process, we can only respect that.
I'm not gonna lie, I had never heard of Rachel before and this kinda came out of nowhere and I don't think I really understand the story to its full extent here. I admit that because I've been following you all those years I feel like my brain is wired to dismiss the harm you've done and ready to look for excuses. It looks like it's what's happening a lot in the comments and we should probably all take a step back and wonder if our reactions would be the same if it wasn't you but somedy else that had done all of this. You apologising to Rachel by yourself without being called out shows you've matured I guess. This video is also necessary but we shouldn't be the ones to "accept" your apology, this is something between you and her. We've all done bad things in life, the fact that you have been seeking help for it is great, I hope it becomes and opportunity for personal growth. I think one of the things that bothers me the most is that you had to be in your early/mid 20's when this happened and that's a very fucked up thing to do for an adult (would be for a teen too but less surprising idk). I've really been loving your work those past years and I don't want to stop watching it, but I also don't know if I still can enjoy it, time will tell I guess.
This comments puts everything i’m thinking perfectly! This video isn’t brave, it’s necessary. Cari doesn’t deserve hate from this situation but I don’t think anyone is hating. I think some of her viewers need to take a step back and think of how this situation would appear if it wasn’t someone they liked so much before calling her brave and saying ‘oh well we all have done bad things’. This was quite intense by the sounds of it, and as you mentioned she was an adult. There are even comments on here accusing Rachel of attention seeking, it’s quite worrying. I’m so happy Rachel has been mature enough to accept Cari’s apology and wants to put an end to it all though, and seems to have supported Cari with this even though she isn’t the one who is the victim. It’s been so weird to process it all honestly. editing to add that I really do wish Cari well, i do think this was genuine and from a good place
@@slls9118 oh so she was called out. Because as one of her audience I felt uncomfortable watching this. I don't think she needed to "publicly" apologize. This is between her and rachel - i don't even know her...
@@JS-fi7yo I guess once the word was out that Cari was the stalker she didn't really had a choice. Her last video is full of comments about it that were posted before this video. It's better for her to adress it and apologise from what I believe is a genuine place otherwise people would have kept asking about it , at least now things are clear for everyone.
@@slls9118 I know that Cari worked with Rachel on this video and Rachel only came out with the storytime 3-4days ago. So I don't feel like she made this because she was called out. I feel like this was already in the making if that makes sense.
Adults make mistakes, then they have to live with the consequences and try to fix them. That's what you've been doing, and it's brave of you. The hidden lesson of this story is also that those gossip forums are very toxic places that shouldn't exist - and, contrary to what people think, they're full of adults spreading hate and not just of silly teenagers. Without them, you wouldn't have been triggered in the first place, and you wouldn't have been able to do what you did as a reaction. Take a deep breath, Cari, I'm sure the next few days will be rocky for you, but this too, shall pass.
I still can't believe these types of hate-spewing forums exist...It is very dangerous to play around with other people's lives and the people who are a part of them should realize that this is not normal!
@@MothGirl007 of course we're responsible for what we do. But anyone can do the worst or the best under the right circumstances. And in this case, those forums were the right circumstances to trigger Cari who thought she was attacked. It's not an excuse, but it's an explanation. It's not that she did that out of the blue to pass time, her own issues were triggered.
i'm sure everyone has done something their not proud of or maybe in that situation in the future. this isn't something that happened to us personally so we arent to accept apologies. i do not agree with what happened, but i can also understand how one falls into that vicious circle - I've had a bad break up in the past and did somethings I'm not proud of. we'll never personally know where your mind/emotions/life was at that point in the past, but we cannot hold things against people forever no one would ever grow or learn or just be human. the things you did was a reaction to your feelings/mind at the time - and you've addressed it and still probably dealing with it, i hope that you can also bring closure and move forward best of luck Cari!
This is one of the best apologies I've seen a public figure make. You acknowledged what you did was wrong. You respected the wishes of the hurt party. You apologized to them directly before making this video. And you sought out therapy to address the issues that led you to that behavior. I can't forgive you, because I'm not Rachel, but I applaud you for this very raw admission and the way you are handling it. It does take courage to apologize properly especially when the behavior is so opposite to what your channel vibe is. And I think as long as you keep working on yourself (as we all need to do) you will grow even more as a person. Good luck!
I... feel disappointed to learn that you were capable to be intentionally malicious over things that you weren't really sure were happening, because it feels like a betrayal of how you portray yourself as in both of your channels (this doesn't mean that I doubt that this isn't your personality!) but at the same time I am glad that you have been able to grow and change after these events (which I can't forgive you for, because I'm not the attacked party here, lol) and that you immediately realized your mistake and did your best to do whatever it was in your power to help those you hurt. I don't know the details of this event because I'm literally just watching your video, but I still thank you for showing-not just to me but to everyone that follows you-that even though we are all actively trying to be good and share kindness all around us, we can still be capable of committing acts that hurt and damage the lives of others, no matter what the original intent behind it was. I'm sorry that this is a long comment but I'm actually still reeling from the shock of your revelation. I think that your actions are liable to be criticized and that people have the right to disengage themselves from your content over this. I, however, will not, and I will continue to support your growth; I'm happy to see you truly regret your actions and hope that nothing but greats things come your way and Rachel's ❤️
Unpopular opinion but this apology seems sincere and not “saving face” to me. After seeing Rachel’s videos too I think that Cari was super mature in choosing to out herself in what she posted anonymously, that’s risky - like a truly bad person wouldn’t do that and risk their career and personal brand. Plus some comments are saying she should’ve posted sooner but like why would she unearth all the drama that would also affect Rachel without confirming with her first? With this cancel culture we forget that we all have power for good & evil - you may think you could never do something this bad but someday your mental health could bring you to a point of fear thinking everyone is against you. Maybe consider what you could be capable of in your worst self before you cast judgement so quickly.
I think this is a good example of explaining vs excusing in the context of mental health. Cari saying she was seeking therapy and was dealing with issues that caused her to feel jealous certainly explains what headspace she was in to make her want to do something like that, but it certainly does not excuse her behavior. I will personally be taking some time to decide whether or not I feel comfortable remaining a subscriber. While I am very glad Cari has received the help she needs, I’m not sure this is something that I can forget about as a viewer :/
audrey takeshta that actually isn’t completely true, a subscriber didn’t call her out, the person this happened to made a tik tok about it, and in one of the 2 tik toks she posted, she screenshot red cari sending her a message (years ago) telling Rachel it was her doing it and how sorry she was. So she actually did apologize years ago and even stated in this video it was not her place to speak on it until Rachel brought it up bc she didn’t want to cause any more issues for her. While I’m not condoning her actions I think it’s important to clarify the situation so false information isn’t spread
audrey takeshta is also like to add that a subscriber did ask when the tik toks were made and she said yes but it’s sounding like they have been in contact when she made the original tik toks in the first place but again unsure. And again not trying to defend her or condone such behavior just laying everything out there so I hope this doesn’t come across mean or rude or anything :/
What you did was very wrong. I think the reason a big part of your following is now leaving is because as viewers, we often feel like we know the person on the screen much more than we actually do. People have a sense of entitlement over you and over your content. Now that this 'image' is distorted, people feel like they just had a friend confess something horrible. It's worse than just seeing something on the news; with you, it feels more personal. With all that in mind, it isn't personal. It doesn't directly affect us as viewers, so I wonder what made you post a public apology. Regardless, if this is what was needed for you to deal with your guilt fully and put all your cards on the table, so be it. I believe this'll help you fully move on, although you will lose a big part of your subscribers. You made the right decision to come clean. “Rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness, give me truth.” ― Henry David Thoreau
I agree, specially this part "With all that in mind, it isn't personal. It doesn't directly affect us as viewers, so I wonder what made you post a public apology. "
GIRL TALK Because the other girl made it public too? She said she never reveal Cari's name nor gender but I saw her wearing red shorts on her head on that tiktok. I know I will never see Cari the same way again after knowing what she did to R but it's still kind of unfair how R brought this up after 3 years and even after Cari reached out and exposed herself to her that same year. Still feels weird and doesnt sit well with me.
@@badetgb1446 I don't know the other girl and I don't want to cancel anyone based on what someone else said. Also, I would have preferred not knowing this story because sincerely I don't care. I think if people "cancel" cari right now (unsuscribing), it will be the same as doing bullying. As you said, she brought the story back and this is why cari did this video (because she was the victim), but still, it was done in the past and as far as I know, she doesn't do this anymore and she regret it. I don't have tiktok btw PS : I don't think cari is courageous or anything, but I think she needed to do this video apologizing, so I respect it. Even if I don't really want to know about the story because I don't consider myself part of it. Sorry about my english, I'm french
I do think that this is not a moment for us to make a judgements, that it's better for us to let someone feeling guilty and down for everything they've already realized that what they did is wrong. Just let her be and hope things will get better and everyone can learn from everything that had happened
y’all stop with the cancel culture. we should give people the room to grow and develop instead of bashing them even more. cari i hope you are in a better place now, and keep going despite the negative comments!
i never said apologies could erase anything, the fact that she finally has the courage to apologize for this situation shows her personal improvement and growth. in addition, the victim, rachel, has posted on her ig story expressing acceptance of cari’s apology and intention to move on. so i’m just saying, rather than giving her more hate, we should accept her as a person with an imperfect past (like most of us).
well this was disappointing. I never really expected this from you. I know I'm no one to tell you this, but using poor mental health as an excuse of stalking and harrasing someone over a year doesnt sit right with me; it gives such a bad look to people that suffer mental issues and you (and some of your subscribers) make it seem like what you did was normal. Stalking people its not normal or okay, and should never be justified. What you did was very scary and i dont really think of it, as a ''mistake''. I was a victim of stalking once and this kind of behaviours fuck with victims minds. While i do try sometimes to separate the creator from it's content, i don't think i could do this with this channel :/ Your videos were my comfort zone, and your calming and peaceful character doesnt seem the same. I just cant look at you the same way. So yeah, im unsuscribing. Im glad you are coming clean with this tho, i hope you work yourself out and continue to improve your character. Wish you the best.
Hi Cari. My love for Korea brought me to you and Rachel. I was confused as to why Rachel suddenly took a break on youtube that time. And then a year ago she posted again and talked about the reason, something about moving out because of stalkers. Now, I just felt sorry for Rachel. I've been such an active subscriber to you - always leaving comments, follows and interacts with you on other social media platforms. I just don't know how or what to react. To be honest, I felt disappointed. But I can never know your true feelings as of the moment as well as to Rachel. I hope you find healing, happiness and contentment after this. I hope this apology will reach out to Rachel and also to your subscribers. We all make mistakes, we are not perfect but something like this will take time for the victim to move on and it will definitely leave a scar. Let us all be careful next time and change for the better.
@vandb hope We can never know what Cari was going through in the past and even until now. Saying "she's acting, just copying other YT videos and style" is somehow not okay. Every YT creator have the same style of editing since they are using the same editor or resources or they have similar ideas, not just Cari. I am not trying to defend her because what she did was wrong but telling her she's just "copying" and "acting" is also wrong. What I am trying to say is, let us not add up to the issue between Cari and Rachel. I am a fan of both of them and I am happy they are finally ending this in good terms. Check Rachel's IG. I hope this doesn't sound rude because it's not my intention. Thank you ♥
I started following a year ago only and had no idea about any of this. I don't support or condone such actions but I also don't believe in the toxic cancel culture. The people who think in such terms are also the guilty party. You've reflected on such actions and have grown up since then. As a viewer, what's important to me is transparency, as well as owning up to your mistakes and taking full accountability. Those are very hard to do and to do it publicly and make yourself vulnerable says a lot. Good to hear that you've sought therapy as well. No one is a perfect human. We all have hurt someone in the past in some way or form. Remember how far you've come since then. I hope you and Rachel can both move on from this.
It's okay, people change. You're a sweet girl. The guilt you feel says a lot about the person you are today. You've apologized now and all you can do is aim to be a better version of yourself spreading kindness. You're brave to make this public now we can all move forward :)
@@staciii Well stop thinking and start listening to 5:25 when she refers to the viewers directly in regards to trust before she continues on to speak further about Rachel. I think it's okay for people to acknowledge her regret and inform her that while she did a bad thing she is not a bad person. She has expressed Rachel wants to move forward. She has reached out and attempted to make amends with her privately. Rachel has shown herself to be forgiving and wants to move on, so her part is over. Now Cari is working on herself. She's a good person, so now she's filled with guilt. It's okay to support her through that. You don't need to think, it doesn't matter who she is apologizing to, if someone is hurting you should help them.
@YoshiPeach Mario Life is not Black and White. People change. I love Japan. The Japanese once fought alongside the Nazis and here you are sporting a youtube name with a reference to a game that originated from Japan. I acknowledge they should not bare the sins of their fathers as now they make wonderful games that spread joy. Clearly you have forgiven them as well... so why not Cari? She bullied someone and expressed remorse. Japan along with the Axis powers committed literal genocide. So either you value a game over human life OR people are constantly growing, changing for the better and learning from their mistakes. Life is not black and white. People change.
@@DelToro7 I never said nor implied that people shouldn't support her or not help. I'm saying that if the overall apology/situation doesn't involve us as viewers, since she didn't do anything directly to us, what is there to forgive on our part? Idk why you're passive aggressively telling me to stop thinking and start listening. I watched the same video you did...
Ok everybody, let's all take a minute and think back to the things we may have done in the past that we are not proud of and we would do so differently now. This is called growth. Cari is clearly owning up to her mistake, no matter how big, which she also already did 3 years ago. This video is just another form of her trying to make things right with Rachel. Whether or not it's enough, or if it's helpful to Rachel, is not up to us to decide. There is no need to attack her and in our turn, hurt someone with our behaviour and the things we say online. This has absolutely nothing to do with us, so let's stay out of shall we? Hurting Cari over something in her past, that can't be changed, won't help anyone. Not Rachel, not Cari, not anyone. It just makes this space toxic and creates more awfulness in the RUclipssphere. There is so much going on in the world right now, can we just chill and appreciate the guts it took to own up to what she did, in a public space? If you no longer want to follow, then take your subscription elsewhere and let that be that. Please can we try to support each other's journey and growth, not tear one another down for trying to do the right thing?
@@artistandthecity7585 It's not up to us to forgive her, it's up to Rachel. If you don't want to forgive, or can't enjoy her content after what she did, that's fine too.
@@artistandthecity7585 I most certainly do not intend for any of what I'm saying to carry any hostility whatsoever, very much the opposite, actually. That is also exactly my point. You are, of course, perfectly entitled any feelings you might have and you can have an objective opinion on the matter. Mine is simply that there is no need for anyone to be mean, harsh or toxic for retribution purposes. You can voice those opinions and feelings without being cruel. You're still hurting a human being, regardless of what that person may have done. Someone will be reading all of this, and effecting her in a very real way. Let's be constructive about it, that's all :)
We live, we make mistakes, we hurt others, we make irrational choices, we feel guilt, we become remorseful, we learn, we grow, we mature, we forgive, we make amends and we move on. Congrats, you’re human. Who are we to judge? If both parties are willing recognize one another’s trauma & come to an understanding. Then free you shall be~ That’s all.
It's not that we make mistakes that matters. It's what we do about it in response that matters. And the degree of remorse and contrition you have sincerely expressed matters a lot. It is obvious how much you regret your actions. What makes you a good person, in the end, is not that you were perfect or that you never made mistakes. We are all flawed and damaged people, in truth. What makes you a good person is how you responded when you made your mistakes. You're a good person.
I think every person on the internet has bullied someone and then (hopefully) felt regret about it. You are not that person anymore Cari, and it’s okay to make mistakes and learn from them - Rachel forgives you, and her opinion is the singular one that matters. I will continue to fiercely support you. You are HUMAN. Please don’t hold any hatred towards yourself because of this.
Damn you literally ruined someone's RUclips career....I never expected you to do something so malicious especially since you were already an adult back then. Being in a dark place mentally doesn't excuse such malicious behavior. I hope you grew from this, I really hope that you didn't harass other people and that you've grown as a person.
I might have been once on the receiving end of bullying and harassment, but there's a belief I've always carried: absolutely nobody is born malicious. So many countless factors can go into shaping a person and the internal formations that wraps a person's view on reality, many of which are out of the person's control. Understanding this has helped me cope with my trauma and begin practicing compassion for my past abusers. If you're willing to move forward and grow every day, then I support you, Cari.
People fuck up, we all fuck up. I'm 23 years old and I'm only speaking for myself but I can't say I'm proud of everything I've done in my life. The important thing is to apologize, learn and grow, it's part of being human. I'll continue to follow and support your channel, Cari, not because I justify what you did in the past but because it's pretty clear that you've grown since then and you've learned your lesson. I was a victim of cyberbullying when I was 15 years old and it was hell, sometimes I wish the people who did it to me would have apologized.
Why did you cyberstalk her? It’s so not in line with the person you are, it just feels surreal. Like how did you decide to set time aside to cyberstalk? And how did you pick Rachel? I’m so disappointed in you. I feel like I don’t know you. Maybe it’s true what they say people are not who they are in front of the camera.
I’m sorry I don’t want to be vicious but I really loved you so much, you were such a positive influence in my life. This almost feels like a breakup, or a betrayal of sorts..
She directly explained how she came to that situation... Im surprised too that she did such a thing but she is human. We feel emotions that are hard to control. No youtuber, influencer or celebrity wants to show their ugly side. This is something we should always keep in mind. Never keep your hopes up because "for every behavior there will always be a consequence." Im not saying i support what she did but im just saying never judge a book by its cover.
To everyone in the comments speculating about Rachel's motives to make TikToks regarding this situation even though Cari already apologized to her, please consider the following: A lot of times trauma survivors think they've gotten over something, but then weeks, months, even years later they'll realize that they haven't really gotten over the trauma. The timing of Rachel posting her TikToks isn't shady at all. Her trauma probably resurfaced as a complete surprise to her, and one of the ways that she coped with it was by making TikToks. No one likes succumbing to trauma that they thought they had already resolved. It's insensitive to say that Rachel should modify her behavior because her bully apologized. Rachel never even mentioned Cari's name, or any identifying information, unlike Cari, who posted Rachel's private identifying information, and the private identifying information of her loved ones. Let Rachel heal. Rachel was terrified for her life. Like Cari said, Rachel deserves to control when and how to talk about her story. Although she forgave Cari, the wounds and the trauma remain. Cari even said that what she did isn't something that you can easily (or ever fully) move on from. Let's all remember that Rachel is the victim here. Not Cari.
So I took a night to sleep on this to find what I wanted to say and here it is: What you did was not ok and will never be ok to do to anyone regardless of a wrong done or not. However, you acknowledged your transgression and confessed to the victimised party. You took measures to fix what you did. You got therapy. You've obviously been swimming in guilt since then and most likely suffered heavily for it. Your victim is now speaking out and has chosen to take steps to forgive. That is between the two of you ultimately. Healing is hard and takes time. Especially in such circumstances as this. I don't know you personally Carie. What I do know is that it isn't my place to judge you. We all have done things we regret We all have hurt people both intentionally and unintentionally. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." My point is you are trying to repent, to make things better and resolve it. So for this I am proud of you. I am not the one you wronged so my forgiveness isn't needed but you have it anyway and while I didn't expect this of you, I am choosing to continue to support your channel. You are choosing to better yourself, to get help, and to mend things. That is all we as viewers can ask for. Much love ~Shannon
It's really hard for me to try and connect this, presumably past, side of you with your online persona. I know I do not know you personally but I can't help but feel betrayed for some reason, as your videos brought me so much light and positivity. Personal growth and reflection is important, and I do not support cancel culture. However, I think I need to take some time and think about how I feel about supporting your future content. I do really wish you the best, though, and I hope you can continue to learn and grow and become a better person.
It takes a lot of courage, growth and guilt to come out and tell the person you’ve been hurting anonymously that you were the one doing this. I think that someone else in your position (a person with following) would never come clean - to not destroy his own career. I’m really glad you did that.
you're young, you have a platform, you can be an advocate for mental health, for women, for fighting against bullying, for learning from your mistakes and growing. let's all be people who lift each other up.
Wow this really was a surprise. Tbh i feel sick to my stomach. I just can’t wrap my head around why you would go that far. I like your videos but my perception of you as a person has completely changed and I don’t think i can ignore that
Cari could’ve easily buried this under the guise of anonymity, but she didn’t - she went out of her way to confess to Rachel and that takes a lot of courage. She even publicly apologized on PULL and tumblr two years ago where she stated that she was the first domino to fall in a chain of events. We don’t know the full story of what happened or the extent of Cari’s role in the online harassment. I’m not defending or supporting any of her actions, but even in our disappointment, what gives us the right to go on a witch-hunt? I do believe that she’s still the personality she portrays on her videos but this was a part of her that she has to confront and has been confronting privately. She’s genuinely sorry, but the only person who can offer her forgiveness is Rachel. Not us. I hope that in time, Cari can also work towards bettering and forgiving herself.
We have all done things that have hurt someone around us and that we deeply regret in our lives. My heart goes out to both you and Rachel and I know this might not mean much coming from a person who has never met you irl but I am so proud and amazed by you because it is really hard to admit and own up to one's mistakes. You have not betrayed my trust. You are only human and that is completely fine. You are a the kind of person who spreads joy and positivity and I can't express enough how your vidoes has helped me cope with so many things the last year and a half💕
If the person in question has forgiven you, forgive yourself also and have some closure. It happened, let it be your past. You are not that person anymore. Keep improving yourself and stay strong :) you are doing just fine.
This is jarring not only from what you did, but it being so out of character from what we see in your videos. However you are not by any means obligated to share your entire self to the world here. I appreciate the grow up you did by the apologizing. Bullying someone for any reason (I’m most shocked you went after her family) is so wrong and I’ve experienced quite a bit when I was younger. It’s confusing on what to think now that you’ve sought help. I can only hope this will teach others to curb their wrath and seek help as well. Perhaps you can take this a step further and donate to an organization committed to stop cyber bullying and encourage others to donate as well. Apologies are a good first step, but I’d like to see another step taken as action for amends.
This was certainly the last thing I expected to see when I randomly decided to see what Cari's top viewed videos are. But it was years ago, people live and learn and grow. Wild.
This vid was recomended on my page, I had no knowledge of the incident she talked about in this video, but I was surprised yet pleased that she decided to keep this video even after 3 years. Some influencers will delete their apology videos after a few months.
The only knowledge I have of this situation is what you are presenting with this video but I really respect your decision to step up and own your prior mistakes. Nobody is perfect and despite what people may think, not everything we see of someone online is 100% their whole selves. Everyone has demons and you are allowed to struggle, make mistakes and most importantly, change. Like I said, I'm really proud of you, I truly love you and your channel and I'll continue to support you throughout all of this 💕
Cari, you have named your wrongdoings without making excuses, your victim has accepted your apology and you have done the work to unpack your behaviour and grow. Nobody here knows the full story of your experience and motivations. And so while many are going to to need time to come to terms with this, and the broader fact that people (celebrities and youtubers especially) are deeply complex, *that is not your burden.* My mother always taught me 'sorry' means you'll never do it again; and if that's true that's all that truly matters. Give yourself grace and time and continue to create in whatever capacity you feel called to, move forward.
How do you harass someone online so bad that the person can't go out. Like how? She posted pictures of her house? Being behind her out? I don't see how this was done. People are crazy in dms all the time?
this is the only comment that makes sense. everyone is posting a comment like they are innocent of everything... wow . do people even know their own thoughts are wicked?
I just want to remind everyone that none of us are perfect and if you choose to cancel her over this then you are contributing to the problem of the “cancel culture”. This isn’t even any of our business yet some subscribers take it SO personally. It’s ok if you want to unsubscribe and you’re disappointed, but punishing someone for their past mistakes when she clearly feels guilty about it gives no room for growth and love. It’s not your job to forgive her, just listen and appreciate the honesty.
You made a mistake in the past, and you've grown since then. You seem to be a different person now. At the end of the day, however much I enjoy watching your videos, I realize that I don't know you, I don't know who Cari is... sometimes I forget that you also have those episodes of paranoia, that you feel attacked about because you've noticed more negative comments than the usual... sometimes I forget that you are human too, that you have both good and bad in you. I would love to see more you, more of the real Cari :) sending you Much love and support in these difficult times
To everyone saying “Rachel already forgave her” Rachel knew about this for 3 years and had time to heal and forgive We her viewers just found out about it we were betrayed too I’m not saying to throw hate but it’s understandable the negative reaction to this because it is extremely out of the blue and disappointing
I unfortunately have a very weird stance on this. I have hurt and traumatized people closest to me. It was the worst pain I’ve ever went through in my entire life and still to this day it is painful to think about. I can only imagine what they went through. I stood before my family and friends and completely wrecked everything and anything I had with anybody after telling them what I had done. I publicly apologized several times. In return, I didn’t get necessarily the same trauma I gave but something very similar to what you did, Cari. One of the people I hurt would not let me live a normal life. Several of their friends came after me and snatched posts from my private social media’s, snapped pictures of me in public, and my entire pregnancy and raising of my small baby was so screwed over. I couldn’t walk out of my house and go to my favorite video game shop with my newborn without said stalker being there and conspiring over my child. It is traumatizing. However, I traumatized said person so this is a bit different. As an individual who has been on both ends of this... truly and honestly both ends... this apology while necessary, was not owed to any of us. I still to this day find myself apologizing to mutual friends for what I did all those years ago, and they’re people I didn’t even hurt. They knew what I did. They formed their opinions of me. However they understood I had handled this matter with those that I hurt. I know this situation is different as you are a youtuber, but as someone who’s well known in my hometown community... it’s my equivalent to say I understand. I do think apologies are brave, necessary yes, but still brave because I’ve been the most toxic lowlife in the entire world and I still have been told several times that my apologies were due with people and everyone got one and swallowing my own hurt knowing I did unspeakable things to people... even they felt as though it was brave because we could have handled this privately but I said no, let me tell the world. I don’t really know who Rachel is, I did watch the tik tok. I understand it’s her way of coping and I will not judge her for that however I could not imagine vaguely making a post such as that even to my worst enemy, my stalker. That person ruined my life and I can’t even go in public anymore but that’s just not something I could find myself doing as I do not have the heart to bring that on another person who obviously was not in a state of mind to be safely coexisting with me. I never got my public apology after my stalker ruined every single friendship I ever had and took away my first few months with my child. I don’t want one. Regardless, that’s Rachel’s decision and her way of coping to make said video and this is very public so I will end on this. I personally have no judgement in my heart for you Cari because I’ve been there, of course as long as there is resolution and justice brought between the two people it went down with. You’ve taken your accountability, you are struggling with this now and have been for years as well, and this is something that happened when you were not in a stable state of mind and that’s very obvious to me. Not everyone will see this the way I do and trust me, I understand. I totally respect that and I hope everyone has a blessed day. We are humans with pulsing hearts, drastically different feelings and very screwed over brains. Again, I’m not really sure who Rachel is but blessings to her as she moves through this for the rest of her life, I hope she finds eternal peace and Cari, you as well as you deserve it still, regardless of what you’ve done.
Ahh Cari. I can see how shattered you are. Adults make horrible mistakes all the time. Very few of them ever apologise, face the consequences of their actions or do any of the real work that they need to do on themselves. Rarely, in my experience, do they do anything close to working through the pain they caused with the person they hurt. That’s what I see you doing. I’m not going anywhere. Right now though, I hope you are getting all of the support that you need. Right now you may not feel like you deserve any kindness or support. But you do. You may want to give it all up. But please don’t. Take the time to look after your beautiful flawed self x
as a person who has also done mean and messed up stuffs to friends/people in the past and is trying my best to change i think i know what it feels like but please people before you 'attack' or get mad at cari you need to know people make mistakes, sometimes huge mistakes and sometimes not that huge. what cari did was wrong but if you watch her videos, her stories and all you would see that she's changed for the better. nothing can ever make up what she did to the people she's hurt but she can change for the better, everyone can :) i hope you get what i'm saying i am not that good at english, have a good day everyone and stay safe and healthy pls 🥰
i never comment on posts, but i'm so disappointed. i don’t even know how to feel right now. part of me is saying "the victim forgave you and is moving on so i shouldn't be invested or care anymore" but another part of me is saying "wait a second it's been three years,, and the victim just so happened to make tiktoks about this two days ago and you're just now magically making an apology video?" confused, shocked, and disappointed to say the least.
Me too, I never comment on posts, and like you I am conflicted as well :( People are pointing out that this is between Cari and Rachel and while this is true, I also couldn’t help but think that, somehow, as viewers, we are unconsciously involved and yes, we also deserve this apology. We spent time to watch her content, subscribe to her other channel, buy her jewelry, her art and photos because we believed in her. We rooted for her to thrive, not knowing she was causing someone’s downfall. It’s so sad and frustrating and disappointing but at the same time I wish for Cari to better herself, not cancel her. It’s confusing.
I am profoundly shocked and disappointed. I made myself wait a day before commenting because I am really at a loss over this but I didn't want to react to this out of anger. I think the hardest part for me is to look back at all the videos that you made and I enjoyed that were made not only during the time that this was happening but also afterwards. I think that is where the biggest break in trust is for me, you continued on the very platform you bullied and harassed her off of and allowed us to consume that content without knowing the ugly truth. I don't think you're brave for posting this but I admire your openness in acknowledging your need to get help. I also think it was shitty of Rachel to post those passive aggressive tiktoks. I understand that it is her story to tell but those tiktoks rubbed me the wrong way even before I knew you were the person she was talking about. This sucks. I honestly don't know how I want to move forward from this. Regardless of that, I commend your efforts to heal and better yourself. I do wish you the best, Cari.
Cari, Watching this video I had a flashback to a recent video when you were worried about being scrutinized by a older Korean woman when really she was just looking at you and it ended up that she thought you were beautiful. I had been bullied in high school by someone who was insecure and going through a lot all the way into college to the point I almost dropped out had it not been for my friends. In some ways I empathize with you, but in other ways I really think this needs to be a moment for self growth where you really dig deep to figure out what your triggers are and work on being really authentic, not just a polished, aesthetic brand. I am going to take a break for a bit, because something so extreme like this is pretty hard to digest (and really is unfortunately more common than not), and I really want Rachel to be able to come back and do what she loves now that the air is cleared.
I think she was waiting for the victim to say something before saying something herself as to not reopen the matter when Rachel wasn’t ready to talk about it yet, but I know nothing about this so I might be wrong
she did mention in the video that she could not bring it up when rachel herself did not want it to be brought up. they have talked privately so she kept it private.
tbh theres no reason why she would have needed to. its her personal life that's part of her past nobody on the internet has to share everything. these days people on social media expect apologies for stuff that has nothing to do with us its just become something many demands of! i can see why cari decided to make this video and its true the victim also needs to be ready for this to be brought to public attention.
how is it hollow though? We all know and especially Cari knows that the things she did are unacceptable but what do u want her to do. She apologized for j t in the most sincere way. pls don't compare her to other "popular" apology videos just because it's not high quality. And what does her not wearing makeup has anything to do with this?
As a person who lived and grew up with someone who has severe agoraphobia and paranoia, I am really proud of you. This isn’t something I would expect from you but I have seen the headspace that puts people in a position to react like this first hand and, though you do need to be responsible for your actions, the ~real you~ isn’t always there when the panic/paranoia takes over. Panic like this can last for days, months, years or decades, and moving out of the Panic House is the hardest move some people will ever make. This isn’t an excuse (I don’t feel like you’re making excuses either), no one HAS to forgive you because you were suffering from mental illness, and you only came out with this because you felt like you had to (I can’t blame you for that), but your efforts to be better since then are worthy of empathy. There is no going back, there is only being better, and I believe you are capable of that ❤️
I've been bullied and bullied others before back in elementary and middle school. I have already apologized to those i have hurt when they confronted me about it, i was on a dark place during that time too. So i can understand. It makes me upset though how the people that bullied me before never apologized for the actions they have done verbally and physically... In my senior year I became a very paranoid person (not because of people just personal issues) and that greatly affected my relationship with others, we fear of something that doesn't even exist and that we're imagining an illusion of reality. Paranoia is no joke... I'm glad you reflected on your past behavior like i did. No one deserves to go through a hard time....
Cari, I am 62 years old ! And I love your site. I love your content and the music you play and the places you take us to. It calms my soul and brings me peace. I now realize the reason for that is because you were seeking your own peace and you took us on that journey with you. Thank you. Thank you Rachel for forgiving her, it was a huge mistake on her part but your forgiveness now helps you both to work within mercy and grow and succeed and maybe create a friendship that will be important to both of you because it was built in the fires of life and the burdens that come with it. We all have to learn to play nice and appreciate the beauty in the life we are creating for ourselves and those who come in and out of our lives, and even those who see through clouded glass our lives and the perplexities of it. Everyone messes up, but if we learn to take accountability for those mess ups we win the battles of life, which are battles more with ourselves than with others unfortunately sometimes others get pulled in and suffer repercussions because of us. We all have made mistakes and suffered because of others mistakes. Life can really suck sometimes, but it makes the beauty shine so much brighter when it comes. I will continue to watch your videos and follow your journey through life. May you both find the peace you are seeking.
Some people in the comment section both here and on instagram are making this so much worse for the victim, so please can you just.. not? Rachel can deal with this however she wants. Cari choosing to say something now and not before is not your business. You might be invested as a subscriber, but this goes way further than just a 6 min video. Please don't be so nosy and cruel. Let them settle this and choose whether you can move on (as a viewer and supporter) or not. Don't excuse or forgive this. No one here can defend months of bad behavior, that is not a "mistake". But neither can you pass judgment, without knowing the full story. And you will never know the full story. You can choose to stop supporting Cari and voice your disappointment, but that's about it. This is not tea time or gossip. This is serious stuff. So please, be mindful, you obviously never know what is going on behind the scenes. To everyone involved, I hope they heal and get better with time
also cari please don't let any negative comments ruin your mood. mainstream media is filled with emotional triggers everywhere right now, and everyone is looking for a place to convey their bottled up angers and anxieties. don't take their words to heart, everything will be ok
so you make another person's life literal hell, doxxes and stalks her, makes her fear for her life, and then (THREE YEARS LATER might I add) have the audacity to come here and upload this thinking an apology video will do it? wow also this comment is not about me cancelling you, its so beyond that, what you did is a crime. thats it, you don't get to still have a presence in social media after making another girl's life miserable
OK I understand that it's been hard for you but you basically killed someone's RUclips career and definitely one of her biggest audience stream esp for her business...i just can't get over that... I feel like you made her life so hard.... And what hurts is that she's got a small business with her little sister that could have done better if you weren't so petty.
4 года назад+8
My point of view on this situation is that i dont have one. My parents thought me that i shouldn’t get into other people’s personal problems cuz it would cause more unnecessary pain to both sides. In the end of the day, you and that other girl know the whole truth about this situation. I believe you are a good and loving person and as its natural for humans to make mistakes, you made one. Stay strong, i believe in you ❤️
First of all I’m glad you put this out there for Rachel. Honestly, while surprising, I think it is easy for viewers to forget that the people they are watching are actually real people with faults and issues. You’re just a person just like anyone else. While Rachel doesn’t owe you anything, her graciousness shows in her actions towards you and I hope that means that she’s going to be okay. I hope that your candidness continues, but don’t feel like you have to wallow in your mistakes. Learn from them always and keep their lessons in your heart. Keep trying to be better no matter what happens here. Unfortunately the internet can be a toxic place. Make sure to keep striving to be more than that toxicity.
I watched this over an hour ago. Thought on what or if I would comment and here's what I came up with. I didn't know of you in 2017. I came across your "getting a tattoo in Seoul" video last year and only recently decided to subscribe to your channels. I was bullied for my looks in school thankfully before social media existed. I never received an apology from the people who treated me cruelly. I'm okay with that. If both of you have made peace with the past and are working on moving forward then that is the only important thing in my opinion. I will continue to follow you because I enjoy the content. Keep working to be the best Cari you can be, that's all any of us can really do.
wow cari. I searched your name and saw “cari apology” pop up and I thought hmm? what could this possibly be about? there’s no way cari could possibly be involved in a scandal she seems like such a genuinely good person...this is all really shocking and disappointing to hear, I would’ve never expected this from you. I’m glad you took accountability and acknowledged your wrong doings. I truly hope you’re being genuine and continue to reflect on your actions and work on bettering yourself.
I had no idea that it was you...that's so shocking to me since I would have never guessed you'd be the one to do something like that. As a viewer this is a reminder how little we know our influencers. I think this apology is sincere and we all do things that we aren't proud of at some point as humans. Growth and bettering ourselves is just how life goes. I hope Rachel feels closure most importantly and I do hope you, Cari, get through this as well.
Hi! I need to clarify that Rachel never once asked me to make this video. I asked for her permission to make a public apology because I was getting comments about it and wanted to come clean to my channel. She took a huge risk by allowing me to make this. Yes, this vid exposes me, but it also exposes her and her private life to scrutiny and judgment that she did not ask for. Any hate, judgment, or negativity sent her way needs to stop now.
This happened between May to September of 2017. I came forward and apologized to Rachel in December of 2017. People are saying that I revealed private info like addresses, places of work, phone numbers, info about her family members, etc. I would *never* expose where someone lives or anything mentioned above.
Her address, workplace - anything other than the name of her boyfriend - was never posted or even hinted at anywhere by anyone. Rachel would corroborate that.
After seeing photos she posted of her boyfriend, I posted my guess of who he was (I was not positive at the time).
I never contacted her directly (like sending harassing messages, etc). I only spoke back and forth between her friend and others on a gossip forum.
--
I’m adding this because of new comments and messages I'm receiving. Rachel and I worked on this video together - she saw previous recordings and asked for edits and specific things to be added which I did without question. I only published this take when I got her blessing. I did and still do sincerely apologize. I left out specifics in this vid because I didnt know how detailed I should be - this is personal to Rachel. I truly wish her healing, as I have for the past years.
I think we are both in much brighter places in our lives now and hope we can continue into bright futures. Thanks always.
God be with you . You did the right thing
People will have different opinions about this. A lot have reacted about the way she brought it up so thats why some find it odd.
@Patrick Starsponge The only one not moving on is you, Patrick. I deleted your previous comment judging Rachel but you still came back for more. Please drop it.
Why did you block Rachel? She didn’t tell you to come clean. You did that on your own. You should have kept your mouth shut
I blocked her number over three years ago when we had an argument and she didnt realize it until now. We had been communicating via Instagram this entire time, I don't know why she suddenly switched from that. She was never blocked anywhere else so I'm not sure why she started telling people she couldn't talk to me. She obviously wasn't blocked on Instagram where I was messaging her.
I reached out to her again and explained the misunderstanding and assured her I didn’t do anything to block our conversations in the past 3 years. It was just a miscommunication but we cleared it up privately.
Well... this is definitely the last youtube channel I ever expected drama from.
Every person has dirt on themselves. Trust nobody
ye lol dat so true man
@@nalaa9618 And that doesn't mean they are not good people. If you follow that rule, you wouldn't be able to trust even yourself.
@@SJ-hk7kc well as far as I'm aware many people who are anonymous on the internet are able to make such mistakes without anyone realising. I am not saying this is a small mistake, but being a public figure means your mistakes become public.
@@SJ-hk7kc as if humans were I inherently good. There aren't "good people limits", everyone has done something they feel ashamed of and regret it. With this mindset, one day you could make a horrible mistake and believe that yourself are not worth forgiveness
Rachel just posted on her instagram stories "It takes a lot of courage to apologize and I respect that. I'm happy that we can both close this chapter together ❤" Just as it's not our place to forgive on Rachel's behalf, it's not our place to deal out retribution on her behalf. The injured party wants to move on and we should respect that too.
@@xosamreen cari explained everything she did in this video
This situation has just reminded me to do better at separating myself emotionally from the youtubers and creators I watch and support. I’ll continue to enjoy and seek comfort in their content, but I won’t presume to know them and I certainly won’t denigrate myself by comparing my life to theirs. Things go on that we have no idea about. Sometimes they come out and sometimes they don’t, but there’ll always be so much we don’t know about the people we watch online. It was really brave of you to confront this head on Cari and I hope you’re looking after yourself. As hard as that behaviour is to reconcile with the impression I’ve always had of you, I do want to believe that each of us is more than the worst thing we’ve ever done.
I can agree,I always tend to compare myself to youtubers and how I can make myself better ,this made me realize I know nothing about the influencers I’m comparing myself to .
(Oof my grammar sucks )
Very well said
I'm so sorry , I disliked by accident, I liked it tho
Idk why people in the comments are accepting apologies when it's not directed towards us. Don't forgive on someone behalf please. It's silly
Apparently the other party accepted her apology 3 years ago but still made funny tiktok about it.
@Badet GB Because she’s clearly still suffering from the repercussions of what Cari did. Even if she accepted Cari’s apology she still has every right to talk about what happened to her as it obviously was an extremely traumatic time for her - she had to delete her youtube account and has said that she’s too scared to ever go back on it again. That, to me, shows that she is still dealing with the trauma of what happened and neither you nor I have any right to comment on how she chooses to process or talk about it.
@@bethgrayson6688 I agree, we have no idea what she went through and I am not downplaying it, I just wish she did a more mature way of telling her story as making it funny (actually kind of revengeful to me) will result to cyberbulling Cari which is not helpful as well
@@badetgb1446 She has every right to deal with the situation however she wants. Maybe making a funny video is just her way of being able to confront her trauma. We have no right to dictate how she does that, and there is no point defending Cari right now when Cari herself has admitted all blame. I agree that this whole situation may result in some people cyberbullying Cari now, which I absolutely do not agree with and don't think Cari deserves that, but if anyone does end up bullying her now then the blame lies only with those people, not with Rachel.
@@bethgrayson6688 Are you replying to my comment? If so, I never said that she shouldn't make a video on it. All I said was that people in the comments shouldn't be accepting the apology/saying "it's ok", only Rachel should.
Cari’s post from tumblr:
I want to talk about feeling distanced from a part of yourself, or rather separating a toxic part of yourself and convincing yourself it’s not really you.
I don’t want to seem like I’m trying to play the victim here at all. I was faced with a challenge and i failed it. I was weak where i very easily could have been strong. I was put into a very uncomfortable work situation where I was the most depressed i have ever been in my life. I had to sit in the kitchen at work because i would just be crying uncontrollably at the office. It was everything from minor sexual assault to not having a bed for 3 months. I was being emotionally abused for 3 months straight by the person who basically controlled my job, my housing, and the opinions of everyone around me. This then continued for many months after that.
Because of my depression, the new people I was working with treated me in all different ways. Some were over the top supportive and asking me how i was doing every day tears or no tears, and some were the opposite.
By the end of the summer I had lost 20lbs and was trying to figure out how to see a therapist with no american medical insurance. I had to ask my abuser if the company would cover my therapy and his response was ‘you need to make more friends.’ I never got treatment.
I came back to Korea with my depression for 6 more months, with the treatment by the new coworkers getting even worse, which in turn made me treat them poorly too. That’s when the toxicity of my personality became clear. Luckily I had my best friend and my boyfriend with me in Korea so I wasnt facing it alone, but my depression was turning into something much more dangerous. This was the first time in my life I had met people that unapologetically made me feel horrible and openly ignored or belittled me and my defense mechanism was to try to do the exact same back which, doesn’t work. During this time I also had an infection that almost cost me my kidney, they’re both permanently scarred. I didn’t go to the hospital early on because I didn’t want to miss work and give my abuser an excuse to scold me. Later I needed surgery.
The coworkers were taken out of my life without much closure, but the anger in my heart was still there. It was like a bad break up where I check up on their instagrams not knowing what I’m looking for. Do I want them to be unhappy? Do I want them to be happy? I dont know and its unhealthy.
My depression significantly lifted nearly simultaneously with me not having to deal to those people and after I started RUclips I was so happy! My best friend had just moved away so I was suddenly missing a huge piece of my life. RUclips was something that was motivating me to leave my house and the comment section was where I had most of my human interaction.
Looking back on it now, I was much lonelier than I would ever admit to myself. As for my boyfriend, youtube was like my own little world so we never talked about it and it felt very private and very mine. He is always a shining light for me, but only recently did i let him into this part of my life.
Though I thought my depression had left me alone, something happened that proved I was wrong.
I had done something that was misunderstood, and it was the first feeling of being attacked that I’ve had since the time I was depressed. This misunderstanding caused someone to do something so small and so petty that it shouldnt have bothered me, and writing it here seems so stupid, but it really hurt me. My best friend had left, i had started this new fun creative adventure and every time i logged in i would be met with a small gesture of hate. To them it probably felt like nothing, and looking back on it I should definitely have been able to handle it, but at the time it felt like i had made these special paintings and every day i’d find someone poured a bucket of red paint over each and every one of them. It really sounds so dramatic but I was (or maybe still am) emotionally weak from basically 2 years of emotional abuse and it got deep under my skin.
Everything about this situation was so petty that I didnt want to talk to anyone about it, so I buried it. Then I gave up. It was like someone kept picking on my scab i was trying to ignore and i took the bait. I got angry and acted out, but it was worse because i had the internet and i could be anonymous. And my actions hurt people. I hurt people. And i can never undo what i did or excuse why i did it.
The scariest thing about this was, i was able to completely separate the me that was mean in this one space online, from who i was “in real life.” That person i was being was the opposite of the morals and standards i hold myself to “in real life” even though so much of what i consider my “real life” is online. This is where im going to get confusing because to be honest im still confused.
There was a part of me that felt satisfaction seeing people agree with some mean thing I wrote online at the same time i’d feel totally ashamed and guilty and i couldnt sleep because of what i did.
I know i seem really positive and happy and like a supportive friend and i am, but there was a small part of me that wasn’t or still isnt, i guess, because i know even though im suppressing it, its still there. What was most unhealthy is that i was so sure it was just an internet persona that i didnt consider it to be a part of myself. The person you see on youtube or tumblr or instagram is honestly who i am, its not a fake personality i put on, thats genuinely how i am if you were to meet me on the street. But i refused to accept that that isnt completely me. There’s that 1% of me that is a person i loathe, that im ashamed of, that i wanted to stop being, but part of it felt like such a release to play that role.
I was so ashamed of myself that i couldnt tell anyone. Even my friends that i really trust, it was such a private thing that it almost felt like it was part of another world. Not the reality i lived in. again, confusing but thats just how i felt and honestly still feel a little bit. I didnt want to tell people about it because i didnt want them to think that was who i am, but really it was just i didnt want to admit that that was who i am.
Then one day, it really hit me how badly i had behaved. I felt ashamed and i knew i needed help.
Luckily i have a friend who is understanding. I had lied to her face many times when it came to this dark side of mine. I knew she needed to know and i trusted she would have the best advice and wouldnt sugar coat things for me. And luckily i was right. She listened, and she held me accountable. Now that i finally let someone in and that someone was able to tell me point blank ‘what you’re doing is wrong and unhealthy’ i felt the ability to come forward to the person I hurt. Whether or not they believe me or accept my apology is out of my hands, but now that I know I told the truth, I can begin to move forward.
Now I’m working on figuring out what it was that made me act like that. Why was my reaction to such minor harassment so cowardly? What is it that affected me so strongly? How i behaved makes me feel actually nauseous and I know I will never do that again. I hurt people because i could and thats unacceptable.
With online behavior nowadays especially here on tumblr or youtube, its so easy to be someone you arent. But as you act out that persona long enough you have to accept that its not some persona, its you. Its me. I took those thoughts and words from my own mind and put them out there by my own choice. That rude person is a part of me and i need to deal with it. I think having a great support system around you is important and i lost that now that i have such infrequent contact with my friends.
So if you’re reading all the way through, perhaps its because you’ve felt something like this to? Maybe not taking advantage of online anonymity but maybe you have a small part of your personality that you’re not proud of, that you separate from your true self. I hope you can accept that that is also you and that we all need to work on that if we ever want to grow.
I’m sorry if this is coming out of seemingly nowhere because this is so not my personality, but it is. Its something i am going to deal with and i hope that this inspires anyone else to reflect on some part of themselves they’re ashamed of or distanced from. To accept it as part of you and to grow from it. You cant fix something if you pretend it isnt really there.
Im sorry this was vague and i will feel uncomfortable talking about this with anyone that isnt someone that knows the situation so im not going to answer any comments about this but please see this is as my first step in acknowledging and moving forward. Thank you for listening if you’re still here.
It's from December 7 2017 if anyone wants to find it themself.
Thanks for sharing this, I think this gives a lot more insight into cari's actions.
@@marissa2075 it definitely helped me. What happened was horrible for Rachel. BUT It also draws the need for easier to access mental health and support for on the job harassment.
@@outdoorsycatlady definitely, hurt people hurt people. What she did wasn't right but seeing what she went through makes me empathize with her a lot. It's just a cycle. When a person is constantly in a toxic situation and can't get help it can be detrimental to their mental health and lash out in ways they normally wouldn't. I think if Cari would have explained what led her to that state people would understand a lot more where she came from, but Cari probably didn't want to come off as an excuse of her behavior and some might have taken it as Cari victimizing herself in order to gain sympathy. Knowing this makes her apology a lot more sincere.
@@marissa2075 I agree 100%
I think people needs to realize that figures on youtubes or ig is not as ideal as they think. I mean, social media only shows the brightest parts of their lives. People are entitled to be disappointed bc of the perfect image that they've built out of Cari, but at the same time, there is no need to say harsh things to her. We can't expect or obligate her or any youtubers to put their darksides online in the first place, since it's where they put on only the highlights of their lives. I think it's only Rachel who can forgive her not any of the viewers. It's their choice for people who's unsuscribing, but they need to see the fact that other youtubers they subscribe is not perfect either. We never know them through internet and it's just natural.
I completely agree with you. When I saw this I get awkward, like who the hell is Rachel, what's happening... WTF is this. RUclipsrs are normal persons with lots of good and bad things like us. I want to give my opinion never never mix personal behaves with the content of your channel. I don't see nothing wrong on this channel, I don't know who is Rachel and I don't care about that person. Those things can't be done. Personal stuff don't bring to youtube please, Korea has lots of drama shows don't create more. Shut this video. Thanks and be happy with your crazy things
Please everyone, don't ever stop caring about your mental health and others you love.
It requires almost no courage to hurt someone but it requires immense amount of courage to apologise.
I’m confused. So this situation was resolved privately 3 years ago?? Now, this person is digging it back up..and on a platform asTikTok? I don’t know the other person, obviously so I haven’t seen anything or know the whole story, but I’m wondering why it is being opened back up now?
And, I’ll just say this, I’m much older than probably most of Cari’s audience, and I have done some pretty awful things myself throughout my 50+ years. One thing I have learned is NOBODY is perfect. Every single person has hurt someone maybe in a smaller way than this, maybe in a more catastrophic way. But none of us should be all judgy and making silly remarks about how you never know the real person you are seeing online...no kidding! I promise every single person has some skeleton they have tucked away in a closet.
Now I don’t know what all of this is about but folks, apologies were made and made again. Other person has graciously accepted them, hard lessons learned now moving along.
I’m probably a lot older than much of your audience (in my 40s), but can I just say as you gain a few decades you realise that everyone is capable of making mistakes, and yes, mistakes that can seriously negatively impact someone else’s life. In fact I’d go so far as to say it’s impossible to lead a life that doesn’t negatively impact on others - the boyfriend you dump in your own best interests, the friend you don’t take time to understand, the coworkers you walk away from, the random strangers that reap the wrath of the day you receive sad news, the loved ones who you strike out at or lean heavily on in fear, the impoverished others (who you’ll never meet or even think of) in other countries who are kept in that state by economic systems you (consciously or otherwise) buy into... The thing that gives us the right to hold our heads high and walk forward, thriving isn’t keeping those things secret, hidden and never engaging with them, it’s facing up to their possibility, taking active control of our choices and knowing there’s rarely a decision that won’t cause someone else trouble, if not hurt... None of us act impeccably. All of us make poor decisions, especially when we are afraid. The only thing you can do is regularly take a look at yourself and ask ‘am I doing the best I can here?’ and try to live by whatever ethics you personally deem appropriate (even clashes in our personal ethics can bring us into direct conflict with others and cause harm). Remember that in any situation there are things you *can* control (and therefore be accountable for) and things you have no control over (like how your actions make someone else feel or react, outside factors that come into play...). People who ask the best of themselves often feel guilt for both the things they can *and cant* control. As you get older these decisions - large and small - get harder and come with bigger stakes... kids or no, you become more responsible for more of other people’s lives (kids, elderly parents, employees, your community, the running of your country, etc). The only way it’s possible to bear the heavy burden of existence is to accept you will make mistakes, and you will try to look inward and do better, and, crucially, giving yourself permission to move on (otherwise you stay in a fear state and leave yourself more open to potentially making mistakes again). I think you’ve been very brave, and I wish you well with your journey in life ❤️
I really liked this comment. I think, as someone a bit older than most of Cari's Audience as well, age helps you see how multi-faceted and complex we are as humans and how we can truly be two personalities at the same time like Jekyll and Hyde. Under the perfect circumstances and pressure, we can all be the worst version of ourselves. It doesn't make the harmful actions we take right or excusable, but creates an experience for us to use as a basis of our empathy when other people let us down.
Well said.
I too am older than most of Cari's audience and this comment is spot on. Very well said.
Hi Cari! I was too one of those people who were completely taken aback when I heard what had happened. I'm confused as to why it shook me as much as it did. I think that in itself is a testament to how much we look up to the people we watch on RUclips weekly. It reminds me of those comments you always get about being aesthetically pleasing and showing us all the beauty around you. We don't know you personally but it feels like we do. If we really took a step back we would acknowledge that we only see snippets. I'm glad that you did this video, I'm glad that you've apologized to Rachel and have been in therapy. We all make mistakes. We all have done things we regret and wish we never did. We, well I, cannot throw rocks at you without looking at my own life and decisions. All of this has been a internal lesson for me as well to look back at moments where I might've hurt someone by my words or actions. All the best Cari. Thanks for taking accountability and I pray that this will be a life lesson for you and for all of us who watch... Our actions and our words can cause damage or can cause healing..
So you scared an innocent woman so bad she left youtube? Now we're expected to continue liking/subscribing? I think I need to take a break from this channel- process this- sorry.
I see a lot of people in the comments saying that Cari is using her poor mental health at that time to excuse what she did, and I think that it’s important for those people to re-watch her video and really listen to what she said. She did not say that her being paranoid was a justification for stalking/bullying Rachel, instead she (in my understanding) was trying to fully explain the circumstances in which she made very bad decisions.
Bombarding someone with hate over a situation you’ve just now learnt about but has already been resolved by both parties is a waste of time and a practice of your own poor mental health.
And so, leaving comments like “It’s the being a stalker for me” are entirely pointless, and, when looked at closely don’t actually mean much other than you wanting to feel like you’ve taken the high ground on something you view as ‘drama’.
I agree with you. Cari was struggling and because of that she caused irreparable harm to Rachel. She is aware of that and doesn't need people to harass her further. It doesn't help the victim in the situation at all. Instead, we should focus on supporting Rachel and reflect on any personal harm we have caused others.
The “higher ground” part all the way! These people must lead perfect lives the way they pass judgment on others. So easy to do when your dirty laundry isn’t public.
@@estherstarr preach
Who would have guessed she'd done that from just watching her vlogs, this is another proof that even the sweetest looking influencers we see on social media can be evil. I am actually really disappointed as I just started watching her content recently and found it interesting, I don't think I will come back to her channel again but I really wish she gets treatment and never harass anyone again whether it is online or in real life.
She says in the video she’s been in counselling for three years... so she did receive treatment. Everyone is acting like they’ve never purposely hurt someone before. Everyone has done something terrible, I guarantee it. Rachel forgives Cari, so why can’t we just put it in the past
Bye👋
What you did was not okay, but you realize it yourself. We should all take a step back and acknowledge this isn't just tea. It is not on any of us to forgive or excuse your actions. What I can appreciate tho is you not putting up a front here. You also could have shut about about this and the victim probably never would have gotten closure. But you didn't. It takes courage and growth for that. Anyways I hope you are in a better space now. Both you and Rachel will need to do a lot of internal work to move on. This might open up new wounds for both of you. I hope you are not too harsh on yourself now. All we can do as humans is to own it up, work on ourselves and never let it happen again
Disappointed is an understatement. Yes people can grow and learn. But the amount of effort you put in to attack someone and their loved ones is disgusting. That means you stayed up late and thought of ways to ruin their life. And you purposefully stayed anonymous until you felt guilty, when she tried to delete videos you even reuploaded them??? Why??? That’s overkill at that point. You even said this came from a place of paranoia so to inflict that purposefully on someone else is painstakingly terrible and you should feel ashamed and lucky there were no legal ramifications. What an intensely immature and ignorant thing to do.
And your comment is also just not nice. Funny how a youtuber cant have flaws yet you an anonymous person feel the need to spew such uncaring comments. 2 years later and this comment still has not aged well!
What a horrible thing to do to someone, I can't even imagine how paranoid Rachel must've felt. I'm sorry but I can't continue to support someone with so much maliciousness in their heart. I hope you really have changed as time has passed since the incident and I wish you good luck on your future personal growth.
I am not shattered by this because I don’t idolize youtubers or “influencers” or celebrities or the like but I’m disappointed. I’m glad you didn’t just ignore this and addressed it but it seems very late and sorta useless now because of how Rachel’s life has been affected. Safety and security are a basic human need and that was taken away from her. I’m glad you are both talking and that she seems to have accepted your apology. Hopefully, Rachel can move forward from this and feel safe again. I hope you are also able to move past this and truly grow from it
Also I want to know why people are so invested in other people’s drama lol like I think it’s awesome that cari is gaining help and apologized to this Rachel girl and Rachel forgave her. Because at the end of the day it’s between them only, they know the whole story because we only know glimpses of it. So I wish people would stop acting like psychologists on this matter.
So wonderfuly true.
gm lee yea well unfortunately many people go through things that can affect them but it’s how you overcome it that matters.
Nala D I understand lol but I don’t know exactly what she did and I’m not going to figure it out. Because like I said it’s between them, I don’t know the full story, everyone spreading false information at this point. But Rachel forgave her, so why hype it more than it needs to be? I’m glad cari is taking the steps she needs to help her mental state that she dealt with at the time though. Not a lot of people acknowledge their faults. So good for her.
And I’m not forcing anything. You see how you commented full of anxiety? Relax.
gm lee yes as a psychology major in grad school, I do think she needs to acknowledge her faults. I think EVERYONE should acknowledge their faults but not everyone does. I don’t care about the apology video, this isn’t about us. She’s human and went through stuff she has overcome, she apologized to Rachel and they are working it out together. They are both finding the steps to heal from this and cari is talking to someone about her mental health issues (that everyone has). For some reason mental health and improvement is disconnected for a lot of people, in order to become a better you, you have to acknowledge what you did and work from it. Every single person on this planet have done something hurtful or something they regret but being able to admit it is very hard but it’s the most important. Humans are not perfect but learning from these mistakes is what will help society, but unfortunately not everyone owns up to their mistakes or seeks help for their mental health issues. Also, people who do acknowledge their faults and/or seek help are look down upon and criticized for trying to improve themselves, such as this situation here.
gm lee I’m not defending her and I’m not saying Rachel is at fault either? Do you see how you are conjuring up something inside your mind? This isn’t about defending and picking sides. This is about actual facts within mental health. That is my point, nothing more, nothing less. This is between them and they are okay with each other, why are you trying to start something that has absolutely nothing to do with you. If Rachel forgave cari than that’s ALL that matters. I don’t care about whether people are picking sides or acting if they are educated on this matter, when they are not. And if you don’t want to watch her videos than don’t? Simple.
no one is actually the same as they were 3 years ago or even one year ago, so don't shame anyone from both sides, she came out to make an apology but remember that this was for Rachel mainly, the apology is not completely ours to forgive, and from hearing this it kinda looks like Rachel wants to just forget it and come to terms with it, so to the ones throwing hate to both of them, please respect their privacy, give advice or constructive criticism to them from a distance. we all need to check ourselves
@vandb hope What is the purpose of this statement? Did you really think that necessary? What's your game? With this attitude, you only prove you're not better that what Cari did in the past. And you seem to want, with greed and under a fake justice disguise, to perpetuate the circle of harassement that none of those two woman want. Comments in this space here seems (miraculously) really pragmatic and well built, with wisdom and fineness/subtlety analysis of the situation, even if all of thoses people do not agree. Take a step back, please, really. Cause this situation is complex and should not be approch with a binary vision, this do not help. (sorry for my bad english, i'm french and not fluent.)
@@heidigritt2498 i'm not preaching, i'm talking about the people who are insulting and badly shaming them further in the comments
This was the right thing to do. Acknowledging that doesn't praise cari for apologizing, it encourages healthy behavior which is much needed in today's toxic social media environment. Admitting that you have a problem and are actively working on it instead of choosing to continue hurting others is an important part of the process. Over half the people on here wouldn't have the guts to hold themselves accountable, especially in a public setting. I hope everyone involved can heal from this. I wish you luck on your journey to finding inner peace, I'll be sticking around. Keep working on you 💜
Very surprised to hear you say you've done such a thing, I would never have imagined you could ever act like that, so not in keeping with how you come across in your videos. I think that shows you've grown and changed from whoever that was who hurt the other party in such a manner. If she has forgiven you, then forgive yourself and don't beat yourself up for it anymore. Take care!
@@xosamreen Feel welcome to read my comments, I try my best to explain the situation
@@whatever_voyez5123 i couldn't find it
Long-term viewer here. I also watched DearSeoul before she quit. This came as a huge shock to me. It's definitely not something I can picture coming from you. But I know where you're coming from here, because I too destroyed someone's life via cyberbullying and art theft for an entire 3-4 years straight when I was a teenager (I'm 28 now, we sorted it out between us, but I think about her often and wonder just how damaged she is because of what I did. She didn't really fully forgive me, and my actions will haunt me for the rest of my life). I had a strange obsession with her and wanted to be exactly like her, because myself had ZERO self esteem or sense of identity (still don't really). I'm open about it because I know that sometimes we as humans just do some really stupid ass shit, but we are all capable of growing and being better. It just sucks when our 'stupid ass shit' ends up traumatizing someone else.
I'm glad that you've apologized and seems like you've worked it out with Rachel which is all you can really do. I hope over time you're able to forgive yourself and move past it, and I hope those affected will be able to too.
I have been always scared of following people on the internet because we never actually see the true person. But I'm glad that you did this video and I hope you won't make the same mistake again (I hope this doesn't sound rude because it's not my intention). I'm proud of you for working on yourself and I'm pretty sure everyone will keep supporting you :') Be strong!
Mental state cannot be an excuse for any harm you inflict on others. A proper apology should be done without throwing “that mental health excuse” under the bus.
This is in response to the audience’s reaction (“you’re not who you portray on RUclips”) more so than a response to cari’s apology. No one can really speak for her or for Rachel:
It is important to remember that every person is both good and bad simultaneously . No person is just one or the other. That does not mean that their “bad” actions are justified or that their “good” actions are simplified. It simply means that we must hold ourselves accountable for the personas we project onto the people (including creators/influencers) we consider into our daily lives. As others have said, it is not up to cari’s audience to forgive her, but it also not up to them to crucify her either, especially if the victim (Rachel) is publicly stating that they wish to move on from this chapter in their lives. Yes we are viewers and our views monetize the lives of these creators, but they do not owe us anything as human beings. It is amazing that we as humans have created these virtual platforms in which we hold people accountable for every millimeter of their actions, and then we create a counter culture (cancel culture) as a response to what we’ve created. Everyone has a right to feel what they feel in response to any given situation, but as we process those emotions and feelings it is important to acknowledge how those feelings are influenced by the false (or misguided) perceptions/personas we have projected onto others.
This is a great comment! I was looking for someone to say this and you have articulated it in a great manner. My thoughts exactly!
Thank you this is exactly what I wanted to say .
This.
One of the best comments on here, I swear.
It’s impossible to live a life without making a single mistake. Like you said, that mistake won’t instantly define you as a “bad” person, but your good deeds won’t justify the mistake either.
The only thing you can do, is to take accountability and continue to learn from your mistakes. It’s up to the individual to do this, not the viewers. It’s not up to us to decide who deserves support and who doesn’t, who’s wrong etc. When both parties want to move on, and have cooperated in this process, we can only respect that.
I'm not gonna lie, I had never heard of Rachel before and this kinda came out of nowhere and I don't think I really understand the story to its full extent here. I admit that because I've been following you all those years I feel like my brain is wired to dismiss the harm you've done and ready to look for excuses. It looks like it's what's happening a lot in the comments and we should probably all take a step back and wonder if our reactions would be the same if it wasn't you but somedy else that had done all of this.
You apologising to Rachel by yourself without being called out shows you've matured I guess. This video is also necessary but we shouldn't be the ones to "accept" your apology, this is something between you and her. We've all done bad things in life, the fact that you have been seeking help for it is great, I hope it becomes and opportunity for personal growth.
I think one of the things that bothers me the most is that you had to be in your early/mid 20's when this happened and that's a very fucked up thing to do for an adult (would be for a teen too but less surprising idk). I've really been loving your work those past years and I don't want to stop watching it, but I also don't know if I still can enjoy it, time will tell I guess.
This comments puts everything i’m thinking perfectly! This video isn’t brave, it’s necessary. Cari doesn’t deserve hate from this situation but I don’t think anyone is hating. I think some of her viewers need to take a step back and think of how this situation would appear if it wasn’t someone they liked so much before calling her brave and saying ‘oh well we all have done bad things’. This was quite intense by the sounds of it, and as you mentioned she was an adult. There are even comments on here accusing Rachel of attention seeking, it’s quite worrying.
I’m so happy Rachel has been mature enough to accept Cari’s apology and wants to put an end to it all though, and seems to have supported Cari with this even though she isn’t the one who is the victim. It’s been so weird to process it all honestly.
editing to add that I really do wish Cari well, i do think this was genuine and from a good place
@@slls9118 oh so she was called out. Because as one of her audience I felt uncomfortable watching this. I don't think she needed to "publicly" apologize. This is between her and rachel - i don't even know her...
@@JS-fi7yo I guess once the word was out that Cari was the stalker she didn't really had a choice. Her last video is full of comments about it that were posted before this video. It's better for her to adress it and apologise from what I believe is a genuine place otherwise people would have kept asking about it , at least now things are clear for everyone.
@@elishka4135 the public apology makes sense now
@@slls9118 I know that Cari worked with Rachel on this video and Rachel only came out with the storytime 3-4days ago. So I don't feel like she made this because she was called out. I feel like this was already in the making if that makes sense.
I’m really surprised. I don’t think there has ever been “Korean RUclipsr Drama” ever.
First of all: That's not a Korean youtube drama 2nd of all there is so much drama with real Korean youtubers.
Victoria Lewis They are RUclipsrs based in Korea. Perhaps I should have written K-vlogger drama to avoid a snarky comment :-) Most people understood!
Adults make mistakes, then they have to live with the consequences and try to fix them. That's what you've been doing, and it's brave of you.
The hidden lesson of this story is also that those gossip forums are very toxic places that shouldn't exist - and, contrary to what people think, they're full of adults spreading hate and not just of silly teenagers. Without them, you wouldn't have been triggered in the first place, and you wouldn't have been able to do what you did as a reaction.
Take a deep breath, Cari, I'm sure the next few days will be rocky for you, but this too, shall pass.
I still can't believe these types of hate-spewing forums exist...It is very dangerous to play around with other people's lives and the people who are a part of them should realize that this is not normal!
@@MothGirl007 of course we're responsible for what we do. But anyone can do the worst or the best under the right circumstances. And in this case, those forums were the right circumstances to trigger Cari who thought she was attacked. It's not an excuse, but it's an explanation. It's not that she did that out of the blue to pass time, her own issues were triggered.
i'm sure everyone has done something their not proud of or maybe in that situation in the future. this isn't something that happened to us personally so we arent to accept apologies. i do not agree with what happened, but i can also understand how one falls into that vicious circle - I've had a bad break up in the past and did somethings I'm not proud of. we'll never personally know where your mind/emotions/life was at that point in the past, but we cannot hold things against people forever no one would ever grow or learn or just be human. the things you did was a reaction to your feelings/mind at the time - and you've addressed it and still probably dealing with it, i hope that you can also bring closure and move forward
best of luck Cari!
Yes this! I couldn't imagine having some mistake I made out there for millions to see and you're already so hard on yourself too.
This is one of the best apologies I've seen a public figure make. You acknowledged what you did was wrong. You respected the wishes of the hurt party. You apologized to them directly before making this video. And you sought out therapy to address the issues that led you to that behavior. I can't forgive you, because I'm not Rachel, but I applaud you for this very raw admission and the way you are handling it. It does take courage to apologize properly especially when the behavior is so opposite to what your channel vibe is. And I think as long as you keep working on yourself (as we all need to do) you will grow even more as a person. Good luck!
I... feel disappointed to learn that you were capable to be intentionally malicious over things that you weren't really sure were happening, because it feels like a betrayal of how you portray yourself as in both of your channels (this doesn't mean that I doubt that this isn't your personality!) but at the same time I am glad that you have been able to grow and change after these events (which I can't forgive you for, because I'm not the attacked party here, lol) and that you immediately realized your mistake and did your best to do whatever it was in your power to help those you hurt.
I don't know the details of this event because I'm literally just watching your video, but I still thank you for showing-not just to me but to everyone that follows you-that even though we are all actively trying to be good and share kindness all around us, we can still be capable of committing acts that hurt and damage the lives of others, no matter what the original intent behind it was.
I'm sorry that this is a long comment but I'm actually still reeling from the shock of your revelation. I think that your actions are liable to be criticized and that people have the right to disengage themselves from your content over this. I, however, will not, and I will continue to support your growth; I'm happy to see you truly regret your actions and hope that nothing but greats things come your way and Rachel's
❤️
Unpopular opinion but this apology seems sincere and not “saving face” to me. After seeing Rachel’s videos too I think that Cari was super mature in choosing to out herself in what she posted anonymously, that’s risky - like a truly bad person wouldn’t do that and risk their career and personal brand. Plus some comments are saying she should’ve posted sooner but like why would she unearth all the drama that would also affect Rachel without confirming with her first? With this cancel culture we forget that we all have power for good & evil - you may think you could never do something this bad but someday your mental health could bring you to a point of fear thinking everyone is against you. Maybe consider what you could be capable of in your worst self before you cast judgement so quickly.
I think this is a good example of explaining vs excusing in the context of mental health. Cari saying she was seeking therapy and was dealing with issues that caused her to feel jealous certainly explains what headspace she was in to make her want to do something like that, but it certainly does not excuse her behavior. I will personally be taking some time to decide whether or not I feel comfortable remaining a subscriber. While I am very glad Cari has received the help she needs, I’m not sure this is something that I can forget about as a viewer :/
audrey takeshta that actually isn’t completely true, a subscriber didn’t call her out, the person this happened to made a tik tok about it, and in one of the 2 tik toks she posted, she screenshot red cari sending her a message (years ago) telling Rachel it was her doing it and how sorry she was. So she actually did apologize years ago and even stated in this video it was not her place to speak on it until Rachel brought it up bc she didn’t want to cause any more issues for her. While I’m not condoning her actions I think it’s important to clarify the situation so false information isn’t spread
audrey takeshta is also like to add that a subscriber did ask when the tik toks were made and she said yes but it’s sounding like they have been in contact when she made the original tik toks in the first place but again unsure. And again not trying to defend her or condone such behavior just laying everything out there so I hope this doesn’t come across mean or rude or anything :/
What'd she do?
ellen u didn't what she explained in the video
What you did was very wrong. I think the reason a big part of your following is now leaving is because as viewers, we often feel like we know the person on the screen much more than we actually do. People have a sense of entitlement over you and over your content. Now that this 'image' is distorted, people feel like they just had a friend confess something horrible. It's worse than just seeing something on the news; with you, it feels more personal.
With all that in mind, it isn't personal. It doesn't directly affect us as viewers, so I wonder what made you post a public apology. Regardless, if this is what was needed for you to deal with your guilt fully and put all your cards on the table, so be it. I believe this'll help you fully move on, although you will lose a big part of your subscribers. You made the right decision to come clean.
“Rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness, give me truth.”
― Henry David Thoreau
Walden
I agree, specially this part "With all that in mind, it isn't personal. It doesn't directly affect us as viewers, so I wonder what made you post a public apology. "
GIRL TALK Because the other girl made it public too? She said she never reveal Cari's name nor gender but I saw her wearing red shorts on her head on that tiktok. I know I will never see Cari the same way again after knowing what she did to R but it's still kind of unfair how R brought this up after 3 years and even after Cari reached out and exposed herself to her that same year. Still feels weird and doesnt sit well with me.
@@badetgb1446 I don't know the other girl and I don't want to cancel anyone based on what someone else said. Also, I would have preferred not knowing this story because sincerely I don't care. I think if people "cancel" cari right now (unsuscribing), it will be the same as doing bullying. As you said, she brought the story back and this is why cari did this video (because she was the victim), but still, it was done in the past and as far as I know, she doesn't do this anymore and she regret it. I don't have tiktok btw
PS : I don't think cari is courageous or anything, but I think she needed to do this video apologizing, so I respect it. Even if I don't really want to know about the story because I don't consider myself part of it.
Sorry about my english, I'm french
What did she do? I’m soo confused
I do think that this is not a moment for us to make a judgements, that it's better for us to let someone feeling guilty and down for everything they've already realized that what they did is wrong. Just let her be and hope things will get better and everyone can learn from everything that had happened
y’all stop with the cancel culture. we should give people the room to grow and develop instead of bashing them even more.
cari i hope you are in a better place now, and keep going despite the negative comments!
i never said apologies could erase anything, the fact that she finally has the courage to apologize for this situation shows her personal improvement and growth. in addition, the victim, rachel, has posted on her ig story expressing acceptance of cari’s apology and intention to move on. so i’m just saying, rather than giving her more hate, we should accept her as a person with an imperfect past (like most of us).
well this was disappointing. I never really expected this from you. I know I'm no one to tell you this, but using poor mental health as an excuse of stalking and harrasing someone over a year doesnt sit right with me; it gives such a bad look to people that suffer mental issues and you (and some of your subscribers) make it seem like what you did was normal. Stalking people its not normal or okay, and should never be justified. What you did was very scary and i dont really think of it, as a ''mistake''.
I was a victim of stalking once and this kind of behaviours fuck with victims minds.
While i do try sometimes to separate the creator from it's content, i don't think i could do this with this channel :/ Your videos were my comfort zone, and your calming and peaceful character doesnt seem the same. I just cant look at you the same way. So yeah, im unsuscribing.
Im glad you are coming clean with this tho, i hope you work yourself out and continue to improve your character. Wish you the best.
a person should not be judged exclusively on the worst thing they've done
Hi Cari. My love for Korea brought me to you and Rachel. I was confused as to why Rachel suddenly took a break on youtube that time. And then a year ago she posted again and talked about the reason, something about moving out because of stalkers. Now, I just felt sorry for Rachel. I've been such an active subscriber to you - always leaving comments, follows and interacts with you on other social media platforms. I just don't know how or what to react. To be honest, I felt disappointed. But I can never know your true feelings as of the moment as well as to Rachel. I hope you find healing, happiness and contentment after this. I hope this apology will reach out to Rachel and also to your subscribers. We all make mistakes, we are not perfect but something like this will take time for the victim to move on and it will definitely leave a scar. Let us all be careful next time and change for the better.
@vandb hope We can never know what Cari was going through in the past and even until now. Saying "she's acting, just copying other YT videos and style" is somehow not okay. Every YT creator have the same style of editing since they are using the same editor or resources or they have similar ideas, not just Cari. I am not trying to defend her because what she did was wrong but telling her she's just "copying" and "acting" is also wrong. What I am trying to say is, let us not add up to the issue between Cari and Rachel. I am a fan of both of them and I am happy they are finally ending this in good terms. Check Rachel's IG. I hope this doesn't sound rude because it's not my intention. Thank you ♥
I started following a year ago only and had no idea about any of this. I don't support or condone such actions but I also don't believe in the toxic cancel culture. The people who think in such terms are also the guilty party. You've reflected on such actions and have grown up since then. As a viewer, what's important to me is transparency, as well as owning up to your mistakes and taking full accountability. Those are very hard to do and to do it publicly and make yourself vulnerable says a lot. Good to hear that you've sought therapy as well. No one is a perfect human. We all have hurt someone in the past in some way or form. Remember how far you've come since then. I hope you and Rachel can both move on from this.
It's okay, people change. You're a sweet girl. The guilt you feel says a lot about the person you are today. You've apologized now and all you can do is aim to be a better version of yourself spreading kindness. You're brave to make this public now we can all move forward :)
I don't think it's up to us to forgive her. She's not apologizing to us
@@staciii Well stop thinking and start listening to 5:25 when she refers to the viewers directly in regards to trust before she continues on to speak further about Rachel. I think it's okay for people to acknowledge her regret and inform her that while she did a bad thing she is not a bad person. She has expressed Rachel wants to move forward. She has reached out and attempted to make amends with her privately. Rachel has shown herself to be forgiving and wants to move on, so her part is over. Now Cari is working on herself. She's a good person, so now she's filled with guilt. It's okay to support her through that. You don't need to think, it doesn't matter who she is apologizing to, if someone is hurting you should help them.
@@staciii she's apologizing because she feels guilty and because she knows this has and will have offended anyone.
@YoshiPeach Mario Life is not Black and White. People change.
I love Japan. The Japanese once fought alongside the Nazis and here you are sporting a youtube name with a reference to a game that originated from Japan. I acknowledge they should not bare the sins of their fathers as now they make wonderful games that spread joy. Clearly you have forgiven them as well... so why not Cari? She bullied someone and expressed remorse. Japan along with the Axis powers committed literal genocide. So either you value a game over human life OR people are constantly growing, changing for the better and learning from their mistakes.
Life is not black and white. People change.
@@DelToro7 I never said nor implied that people shouldn't support her or not help. I'm saying that if the overall apology/situation doesn't involve us as viewers, since she didn't do anything directly to us, what is there to forgive on our part? Idk why you're passive aggressively telling me to stop thinking and start listening. I watched the same video you did...
Ok everybody, let's all take a minute and think back to the things we may have done in the past that we are not proud of and we would do so differently now. This is called growth. Cari is clearly owning up to her mistake, no matter how big, which she also already did 3 years ago. This video is just another form of her trying to make things right with Rachel. Whether or not it's enough, or if it's helpful to Rachel, is not up to us to decide. There is no need to attack her and in our turn, hurt someone with our behaviour and the things we say online. This has absolutely nothing to do with us, so let's stay out of shall we? Hurting Cari over something in her past, that can't be changed, won't help anyone. Not Rachel, not Cari, not anyone. It just makes this space toxic and creates more awfulness in the RUclipssphere. There is so much going on in the world right now, can we just chill and appreciate the guts it took to own up to what she did, in a public space? If you no longer want to follow, then take your subscription elsewhere and let that be that. Please can we try to support each other's journey and growth, not tear one another down for trying to do the right thing?
Yes thank you!! 👏🏼
PREACH🙌
@tina p Does that warrent poor behaviour on our part? Do we really need to live by an eye for an eye?
@@artistandthecity7585 It's not up to us to forgive her, it's up to Rachel. If you don't want to forgive, or can't enjoy her content after what she did, that's fine too.
@@artistandthecity7585 I most certainly do not intend for any of what I'm saying to carry any hostility whatsoever, very much the opposite, actually. That is also exactly my point. You are, of course, perfectly entitled any feelings you might have and you can have an objective opinion on the matter. Mine is simply that there is no need for anyone to be mean, harsh or toxic for retribution purposes. You can voice those opinions and feelings without being cruel. You're still hurting a human being, regardless of what that person may have done. Someone will be reading all of this, and effecting her in a very real way. Let's be constructive about it, that's all :)
We live, we make mistakes, we hurt others, we make irrational choices, we feel guilt, we become remorseful, we learn, we grow, we mature, we forgive, we make amends and we move on.
Congrats, you’re human. Who are we to judge? If both parties are willing recognize one another’s trauma & come to an understanding. Then free you shall be~
That’s all.
Completely agree
I hope you're okay, Cari. You may have done wrong, but owning up to it is really admirable. Take it easy on yourself as well.
It's not that we make mistakes that matters. It's what we do about it in response that matters. And the degree of remorse and contrition you have sincerely expressed matters a lot. It is obvious how much you regret your actions.
What makes you a good person, in the end, is not that you were perfect or that you never made mistakes. We are all flawed and damaged people, in truth. What makes you a good person is how you responded when you made your mistakes.
You're a good person.
I think every person on the internet has bullied someone and then (hopefully) felt regret about it. You are not that person anymore Cari, and it’s okay to make mistakes and learn from them - Rachel forgives you, and her opinion is the singular one that matters. I will continue to fiercely support you. You are HUMAN. Please don’t hold any hatred towards yourself because of this.
Damn you literally ruined someone's RUclips career....I never expected you to do something so malicious especially since you were already an adult back then. Being in a dark place mentally doesn't excuse such malicious behavior. I hope you grew from this, I really hope that you didn't harass other people and that you've grown as a person.
@@Cheuslove like what, go to jail?
@@Cheuslove the only person who can decide that is rachel. this is between them.
I might have been once on the receiving end of bullying and harassment, but there's a belief I've always carried: absolutely nobody is born malicious. So many countless factors can go into shaping a person and the internal formations that wraps a person's view on reality, many of which are out of the person's control. Understanding this has helped me cope with my trauma and begin practicing compassion for my past abusers. If you're willing to move forward and grow every day, then I support you, Cari.
well said
What you've done isn't ours to forgive. If Rachel has forgiven you then thats all that matters.
People fuck up, we all fuck up. I'm 23 years old and I'm only speaking for myself but I can't say I'm proud of everything I've done in my life. The important thing is to apologize, learn and grow, it's part of being human. I'll continue to follow and support your channel, Cari, not because I justify what you did in the past but because it's pretty clear that you've grown since then and you've learned your lesson. I was a victim of cyberbullying when I was 15 years old and it was hell, sometimes I wish the people who did it to me would have apologized.
Why did you cyberstalk her? It’s so not in line with the person you are, it just feels surreal. Like how did you decide to set time aside to cyberstalk? And how did you pick Rachel? I’m so disappointed in you. I feel like I don’t know you. Maybe it’s true what they say people are not who they are in front of the camera.
I’m sorry I don’t want to be vicious but I really loved you so much, you were such a positive influence in my life. This almost feels like a breakup, or a betrayal of sorts..
But we don't know her or any youtuber if you think about it. RUclipsrs are strangers who we choose to watch what they show us. That's it
She directly explained how she came to that situation... Im surprised too that she did such a thing but she is human. We feel emotions that are hard to control. No youtuber, influencer or celebrity wants to show their ugly side. This is something we should always keep in mind. Never keep your hopes up because "for every behavior there will always be a consequence." Im not saying i support what she did but im just saying never judge a book by its cover.
To everyone in the comments speculating about Rachel's motives to make TikToks regarding this situation even though Cari already apologized to her, please consider the following:
A lot of times trauma survivors think they've gotten over something, but then weeks, months, even years later they'll realize that they haven't really gotten over the trauma. The timing of Rachel posting her TikToks isn't shady at all. Her trauma probably resurfaced as a complete surprise to her, and one of the ways that she coped with it was by making TikToks. No one likes succumbing to trauma that they thought they had already resolved.
It's insensitive to say that Rachel should modify her behavior because her bully apologized. Rachel never even mentioned Cari's name, or any identifying information, unlike Cari, who posted Rachel's private identifying information, and the private identifying information of her loved ones.
Let Rachel heal. Rachel was terrified for her life. Like Cari said, Rachel deserves to control when and how to talk about her story. Although she forgave Cari, the wounds and the trauma remain. Cari even said that what she did isn't something that you can easily (or ever fully) move on from.
Let's all remember that Rachel is the victim here. Not Cari.
So I took a night to sleep on this to find what I wanted to say and here it is:
What you did was not ok and will never be ok to do to anyone regardless of a wrong done or not. However, you acknowledged your transgression and confessed to the victimised party. You took measures to fix what you did. You got therapy. You've obviously been swimming in guilt since then and most likely suffered heavily for it.
Your victim is now speaking out and has chosen to take steps to forgive. That is between the two of you ultimately. Healing is hard and takes time. Especially in such circumstances as this.
I don't know you personally Carie. What I do know is that it isn't my place to judge you. We all have done things we regret
We all have hurt people both intentionally and unintentionally. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."
My point is you are trying to repent, to make things better and resolve it. So for this I am proud of you. I am not the one you wronged so my forgiveness isn't needed but you have it anyway and while I didn't expect this of you, I am choosing to continue to support your channel.
You are choosing to better yourself, to get help, and to mend things. That is all we as viewers can ask for.
Much love
~Shannon
It's really hard for me to try and connect this, presumably past, side of you with your online persona. I know I do not know you personally but I can't help but feel betrayed for some reason, as your videos brought me so much light and positivity. Personal growth and reflection is important, and I do not support cancel culture. However, I think I need to take some time and think about how I feel about supporting your future content. I do really wish you the best, though, and I hope you can continue to learn and grow and become a better person.
It takes a lot of courage, growth and guilt to come out and tell the person you’ve been hurting anonymously that you were the one doing this. I think that someone else in your position (a person with following) would never come clean - to not destroy his own career. I’m really glad you did that.
you're young, you have a platform, you can be an advocate for mental health, for women, for fighting against bullying, for learning from your mistakes and growing. let's all be people who lift each other up.
Wow this really was a surprise. Tbh i feel sick to my stomach. I just can’t wrap my head around why you would go that far. I like your videos but my perception of you as a person has completely changed and I don’t think i can ignore that
Cari could’ve easily buried this under the guise of anonymity, but she didn’t - she went out of her way to confess to Rachel and that takes a lot of courage. She even publicly apologized on PULL and tumblr two years ago where she stated that she was the first domino to fall in a chain of events. We don’t know the full story of what happened or the extent of Cari’s role in the online harassment. I’m not defending or supporting any of her actions, but even in our disappointment, what gives us the right to go on a witch-hunt? I do believe that she’s still the personality she portrays on her videos but this was a part of her that she has to confront and has been confronting privately. She’s genuinely sorry, but the only person who can offer her forgiveness is Rachel. Not us. I hope that in time, Cari can also work towards bettering and forgiving herself.
We have all done things that have hurt someone around us and that we deeply regret in our lives.
My heart goes out to both you and Rachel and I know this might not mean much coming from a person who has never met you irl but I am so proud and amazed by you because it is really hard to admit and own up to one's mistakes.
You have not betrayed my trust. You are only human and that is completely fine. You are a the kind of person who spreads joy and positivity and I can't express enough how your vidoes has helped me cope with so many things the last year and a half💕
If the person in question has forgiven you, forgive yourself also and have some closure. It happened, let it be your past. You are not that person anymore. Keep improving yourself and stay strong :) you are doing just fine.
Rachel posted on her youtube about this. Guess this apology was not the one
This is jarring not only from what you did, but it being so out of character from what we see in your videos. However you are not by any means obligated to share your entire self to the world here. I appreciate the grow up you did by the apologizing. Bullying someone for any reason (I’m most shocked you went after her family) is so wrong and I’ve experienced quite a bit when I was younger. It’s confusing on what to think now that you’ve sought help. I can only hope this will teach others to curb their wrath and seek help as well. Perhaps you can take this a step further and donate to an organization committed to stop cyber bullying and encourage others to donate as well. Apologies are a good first step, but I’d like to see another step taken as action for amends.
This was certainly the last thing I expected to see when I randomly decided to see what Cari's top viewed videos are. But it was years ago, people live and learn and grow. Wild.
This vid was recomended on my page, I had no knowledge of the incident she talked about in this video, but I was surprised yet pleased that she decided to keep this video even after 3 years. Some influencers will delete their apology videos after a few months.
The only knowledge I have of this situation is what you are presenting with this video but I really respect your decision to step up and own your prior mistakes. Nobody is perfect and despite what people may think, not everything we see of someone online is 100% their whole selves. Everyone has demons and you are allowed to struggle, make mistakes and most importantly, change.
Like I said, I'm really proud of you, I truly love you and your channel and I'll continue to support you throughout all of this 💕
예전에 어떤일이 일어났었는지 자세한 내막은 모르지만 꽤 끔찍한 잘못을 했었나보군요. 충격적입니다. 피해자분이 마음이 넓은분이라서 다행이고 다시 또 같은 잘못을 되풀이하지 않기를 바랍니다. 그리고 심신이 불안정할때 심리상담과 치료는 분명히 효과가 있어요.
Cari, you have named your wrongdoings without making excuses, your victim has accepted your apology and you have done the work to unpack your behaviour and grow.
Nobody here knows the full story of your experience and motivations. And so while many are going to to need time to come to terms with this, and the broader fact that people (celebrities and youtubers especially) are deeply complex, *that is not your burden.*
My mother always taught me 'sorry' means you'll never do it again; and if that's true that's all that truly matters.
Give yourself grace and time and continue to create in whatever capacity you feel called to, move forward.
How do you harass someone online so bad that the person can't go out. Like how? She posted pictures of her house? Being behind her out? I don't see how this was done. People are crazy in dms all the time?
Your not a bad person Cari, you just did a bad thing. And we would all be hypocrites to judge you.
this is the only comment that makes sense. everyone is posting a comment like they are innocent of everything... wow . do people even know their own thoughts are wicked?
I just want to remind everyone that none of us are perfect and if you choose to cancel her over this then you are contributing to the problem of the “cancel culture”. This isn’t even any of our business yet some subscribers take it SO personally. It’s ok if you want to unsubscribe and you’re disappointed, but punishing someone for their past mistakes when she clearly feels guilty about it gives no room for growth and love. It’s not your job to forgive her, just listen and appreciate the honesty.
You made a mistake in the past, and you've grown since then. You seem to be a different person now. At the end of the day, however much I enjoy watching your videos, I realize that I don't know you, I don't know who Cari is... sometimes I forget that you also have those episodes of paranoia, that you feel attacked about because you've noticed more negative comments than the usual... sometimes I forget that you are human too, that you have both good and bad in you. I would love to see more you, more of the real Cari :) sending you Much love and support in these difficult times
Really don't know why you would do that in the first place.....if there were any doubts you had with her, they could've been cleared out.
why would you do such thing...............
To everyone saying “Rachel already forgave her” Rachel knew about this for 3 years and had time to heal and forgive
We her viewers just found out about it we were betrayed too
I’m not saying to throw hate but it’s understandable the negative reaction to this because it is extremely out of the blue and disappointing
i have no clue what she's talking about but she's really mature
Yeah this just came out out of the blue for me o.o
I unfortunately have a very weird stance on this. I have hurt and traumatized people closest to me. It was the worst pain I’ve ever went through in my entire life and still to this day it is painful to think about. I can only imagine what they went through. I stood before my family and friends and completely wrecked everything and anything I had with anybody after telling them what I had done. I publicly apologized several times. In return, I didn’t get necessarily the same trauma I gave but something very similar to what you did, Cari. One of the people I hurt would not let me live a normal life. Several of their friends came after me and snatched posts from my private social media’s, snapped pictures of me in public, and my entire pregnancy and raising of my small baby was so screwed over. I couldn’t walk out of my house and go to my favorite video game shop with my newborn without said stalker being there and conspiring over my child. It is traumatizing. However, I traumatized said person so this is a bit different. As an individual who has been on both ends of this... truly and honestly both ends... this apology while necessary, was not owed to any of us. I still to this day find myself apologizing to mutual friends for what I did all those years ago, and they’re people I didn’t even hurt. They knew what I did. They formed their opinions of me. However they understood I had handled this matter with those that I hurt. I know this situation is different as you are a youtuber, but as someone who’s well known in my hometown community... it’s my equivalent to say I understand. I do think apologies are brave, necessary yes, but still brave because I’ve been the most toxic lowlife in the entire world and I still have been told several times that my apologies were due with people and everyone got one and swallowing my own hurt knowing I did unspeakable things to people... even they felt as though it was brave because we could have handled this privately but I said no, let me tell the world. I don’t really know who Rachel is, I did watch the tik tok. I understand it’s her way of coping and I will not judge her for that however I could not imagine vaguely making a post such as that even to my worst enemy, my stalker. That person ruined my life and I can’t even go in public anymore but that’s just not something I could find myself doing as I do not have the heart to bring that on another person who obviously was not in a state of mind to be safely coexisting with me. I never got my public apology after my stalker ruined every single friendship I ever had and took away my first few months with my child. I don’t want one. Regardless, that’s Rachel’s decision and her way of coping to make said video and this is very public so I will end on this. I personally have no judgement in my heart for you Cari because I’ve been there, of course as long as there is resolution and justice brought between the two people it went down with. You’ve taken your accountability, you are struggling with this now and have been for years as well, and this is something that happened when you were not in a stable state of mind and that’s very obvious to me. Not everyone will see this the way I do and trust me, I understand. I totally respect that and I hope everyone has a blessed day. We are humans with pulsing hearts, drastically different feelings and very screwed over brains. Again, I’m not really sure who Rachel is but blessings to her as she moves through this for the rest of her life, I hope she finds eternal peace and Cari, you as well as you deserve it still, regardless of what you’ve done.
Ahh Cari. I can see how shattered you are. Adults make horrible mistakes all the time. Very few of them ever apologise, face the consequences of their actions or do any of the real work that they need to do on themselves. Rarely, in my experience, do they do anything close to working through the pain they caused with the person they hurt. That’s what I see you doing. I’m not going anywhere. Right now though, I hope you are getting all of the support that you need. Right now you may not feel like you deserve any kindness or support. But you do. You may want to give it all up. But please don’t. Take the time to look after your beautiful flawed self x
as a person who has also done mean and messed up stuffs to friends/people in the past and is trying my best to change i think i know what it feels like but please people before you 'attack' or get mad at cari you need to know people make mistakes, sometimes huge mistakes and sometimes not that huge. what cari did was wrong but if you watch her videos, her stories and all you would see that she's changed for the better. nothing can ever make up what she did to the people she's hurt but she can change for the better, everyone can :) i hope you get what i'm saying i am not that good at english, have a good day everyone and stay safe and healthy pls 🥰
i never comment on posts, but i'm so disappointed. i don’t even know how to feel right now. part of me is saying "the victim forgave you and is moving on so i shouldn't be invested or care anymore" but another part of me is saying "wait a second it's been three years,, and the victim just so happened to make tiktoks about this two days ago and you're just now magically making an apology video?" confused, shocked, and disappointed to say the least.
Me too, I never comment on posts, and like you I am conflicted as well :( People are pointing out that this is between Cari and Rachel and while this is true, I also couldn’t help but think that, somehow, as viewers, we are unconsciously involved and yes, we also deserve this apology. We spent time to watch her content, subscribe to her other channel, buy her jewelry, her art and photos because we believed in her. We rooted for her to thrive, not knowing she was causing someone’s downfall. It’s so sad and frustrating and disappointing but at the same time I wish for Cari to better herself, not cancel her. It’s confusing.
I am profoundly shocked and disappointed. I made myself wait a day before commenting because I am really at a loss over this but I didn't want to react to this out of anger.
I think the hardest part for me is to look back at all the videos that you made and I enjoyed that were made not only during the time that this was happening but also afterwards. I think that is where the biggest break in trust is for me, you continued on the very platform you bullied and harassed her off of and allowed us to consume that content without knowing the ugly truth.
I don't think you're brave for posting this but I admire your openness in acknowledging your need to get help.
I also think it was shitty of Rachel to post those passive aggressive tiktoks. I understand that it is her story to tell but those tiktoks rubbed me the wrong way even before I knew you were the person she was talking about.
This sucks. I honestly don't know how I want to move forward from this. Regardless of that, I commend your efforts to heal and better yourself. I do wish you the best, Cari.
Unsubbed - this is too much. Poor Rachel; I truly hope this apology is sincere.
oh i really didn't expect this ..
edit: i am glad you apologized. that is really important.
Cari,
Watching this video I had a flashback to a recent video when you were worried about being scrutinized by a older Korean woman when really she was just looking at you and it ended up that she thought you were beautiful. I had been bullied in high school by someone who was insecure and going through a lot all the way into college to the point I almost dropped out had it not been for my friends. In some ways I empathize with you, but in other ways I really think this needs to be a moment for self growth where you really dig deep to figure out what your triggers are and work on being really authentic, not just a polished, aesthetic brand.
I am going to take a break for a bit, because something so extreme like this is pretty hard to digest (and really is unfortunately more common than not), and I really want Rachel to be able to come back and do what she loves now that the air is cleared.
If rachel was not bringing this up like she did on tiktok, would you still going to admit this? I hope your apology is sincere.
I think she was waiting for the victim to say something before saying something herself as to not reopen the matter when Rachel wasn’t ready to talk about it yet, but I know nothing about this so I might be wrong
she did mention in the video that she could not bring it up when rachel herself did not want it to be brought up. they have talked privately so she kept it private.
tbh theres no reason why she would have needed to. its her personal life that's part of her past nobody on the internet has to share everything. these days people on social media expect apologies for stuff that has nothing to do with us its just become something many demands of! i can see why cari decided to make this video and its true the victim also needs to be ready for this to be brought to public attention.
lol - no makeup, wobbling voice, apology in the title 7/10 generic hollow youtube apology video
how is it hollow though? We all know and especially Cari knows that the things she did are unacceptable but what do u want her to do. She apologized for j t in the most sincere way. pls don't compare her to other "popular" apology videos just because it's not high quality. And what does her not wearing makeup has anything to do with this?
I find this apology better than honestly any I've seen so far
As a person who lived and grew up with someone who has severe agoraphobia and paranoia, I am really proud of you. This isn’t something I would expect from you but I have seen the headspace that puts people in a position to react like this first hand and, though you do need to be responsible for your actions, the ~real you~ isn’t always there when the panic/paranoia takes over. Panic like this can last for days, months, years or decades, and moving out of the Panic House is the hardest move some people will ever make. This isn’t an excuse (I don’t feel like you’re making excuses either), no one HAS to forgive you because you were suffering from mental illness, and you only came out with this because you felt like you had to (I can’t blame you for that), but your efforts to be better since then are worthy of empathy. There is no going back, there is only being better, and I believe you are capable of that ❤️
Actions have consequences and the truth always comes to light. Karma. Hope everyone can learn and heal from this situation.
I've been bullied and bullied others before back in elementary and middle school. I have already apologized to those i have hurt when they confronted me about it, i was on a dark place during that time too. So i can understand. It makes me upset though how the people that bullied me before never apologized for the actions they have done verbally and physically... In my senior year I became a very paranoid person (not because of people just personal issues) and that greatly affected my relationship with others, we fear of something that doesn't even exist and that we're imagining an illusion of reality. Paranoia is no joke... I'm glad you reflected on your past behavior like i did. No one deserves to go through a hard time....
Cari, I am 62 years old ! And I love your site. I love your content and the music you play and the places you take us to. It calms my soul and brings me peace. I now realize the reason for that is because you were seeking your own peace and you took us on that journey with you. Thank you. Thank you Rachel for forgiving her, it was a huge mistake on her part but your forgiveness now helps you both to work within mercy and grow and succeed and maybe create a friendship that will be important to both of you because it was built in the fires of life and the burdens that come with it. We all have to learn to play nice and appreciate the beauty in the life we are creating for ourselves and those who come in and out of our lives, and even those who see through clouded glass our lives and the perplexities of it. Everyone messes up, but if we learn to take accountability for those mess ups we win the battles of life, which are battles more with ourselves than with others unfortunately sometimes others get pulled in and suffer repercussions because of us. We all have made mistakes and suffered because of others mistakes. Life can really suck sometimes, but it makes the beauty shine so much brighter when it comes. I will continue to watch your videos and follow your journey through life. May you both find the peace you are seeking.
Some people in the comment section both here and on instagram are making this so much worse for the victim, so please can you just.. not? Rachel can deal with this however she wants. Cari choosing to say something now and not before is not your business. You might be invested as a subscriber, but this goes way further than just a 6 min video. Please don't be so nosy and cruel. Let them settle this and choose whether you can move on (as a viewer and supporter) or not. Don't excuse or forgive this. No one here can defend months of bad behavior, that is not a "mistake". But neither can you pass judgment, without knowing the full story. And you will never know the full story. You can choose to stop supporting Cari and voice your disappointment, but that's about it. This is not tea time or gossip. This is serious stuff. So please, be mindful, you obviously never know what is going on behind the scenes. To everyone involved, I hope they heal and get better with time
also cari please don't let any negative comments ruin your mood. mainstream media is filled with emotional triggers everywhere right now, and everyone is looking for a place to convey their bottled up angers and anxieties. don't take their words to heart, everything will be ok
so you make another person's life literal hell, doxxes and stalks her, makes her fear for her life, and then (THREE YEARS LATER might I add) have the audacity to come here and upload this thinking an apology video will do it? wow
also this comment is not about me cancelling you, its so beyond that, what you did is a crime. thats it, you don't get to still have a presence in social media after making another girl's life miserable
Alex Grace when i said three years later i was talking about the fact that she is only telling us this now
Alex Grace how is DOXXING and STALKING others something “personal” and that should be kept in private?????????????????
Alex Grace sis just say you don’t care she comitted a crime and go lmao omg
OK I understand that it's been hard for you but you basically killed someone's RUclips career and definitely one of her biggest audience stream esp for her business...i just can't get over that... I feel like you made her life so hard.... And what hurts is that she's got a small business with her little sister that could have done better if you weren't so petty.
My point of view on this situation is that i dont have one. My parents thought me that i shouldn’t get into other people’s personal problems cuz it would cause more unnecessary pain to both sides. In the end of the day, you and that other girl know the whole truth about this situation.
I believe you are a good and loving person and as its natural for humans to make mistakes, you made one. Stay strong, i believe in you ❤️
First of all I’m glad you put this out there for Rachel. Honestly, while surprising, I think it is easy for viewers to forget that the people they are watching are actually real people with faults and issues. You’re just a person just like anyone else. While Rachel doesn’t owe you anything, her graciousness shows in her actions towards you and I hope that means that she’s going to be okay. I hope that your candidness continues, but don’t feel like you have to wallow in your mistakes. Learn from them always and keep their lessons in your heart. Keep trying to be better no matter what happens here. Unfortunately the internet can be a toxic place. Make sure to keep striving to be more than that toxicity.
You never really know the true persona of a person though the internet. You never know who they really are.
I watched this over an hour ago. Thought on what or if I would comment and here's what I came up with. I didn't know of you in 2017. I came across your "getting a tattoo in Seoul" video last year and only recently decided to subscribe to your channels. I was bullied for my looks in school thankfully before social media existed. I never received an apology from the people who treated me cruelly. I'm okay with that. If both of you have made peace with the past and are working on moving forward then that is the only important thing in my opinion. I will continue to follow you because I enjoy the content. Keep working to be the best Cari you can be, that's all any of us can really do.
wow cari. I searched your name and saw “cari apology” pop up and I thought hmm? what could this possibly be about? there’s no way cari could possibly be involved in a scandal she seems like such a genuinely good person...this is all really shocking and disappointing to hear, I would’ve never expected this from you. I’m glad you took accountability and acknowledged your wrong doings. I truly hope you’re being genuine and continue to reflect on your actions and work on bettering yourself.
We can't say it is okay only rachel can...
I had no idea that it was you...that's so shocking to me since I would have never guessed you'd be the one to do something like that. As a viewer this is a reminder how little we know our influencers. I think this apology is sincere and we all do things that we aren't proud of at some point as humans. Growth and bettering ourselves is just how life goes. I hope Rachel feels closure most importantly and I do hope you, Cari, get through this as well.