I read the terrible Episode IX pitch where Rey is a robot

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  • Опубликовано: 25 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 6 тыс.

  • @skeletiano
    @skeletiano 5 лет назад +14515

    this was all to make c3po straight

    • @thatonelucariofan503
      @thatonelucariofan503 5 лет назад +1132

      In that case they’re fighting a losing battle.

    • @Humorless_Wokescold
      @Humorless_Wokescold 5 лет назад +408

      Nah, this just makes him bi I think

    • @renderwren4284
      @renderwren4284 5 лет назад +1121

      @@Humorless_Wokescold You've heard of I, Robot. Now get ready for Bi, Robot!!!

    • @IKIGAIofficial
      @IKIGAIofficial 5 лет назад +267

      c3po was our favorite gay robot!!!

    • @stranger59
      @stranger59 5 лет назад +322

      That would be the biggest retcon of all time.

  • @FeebleBird903
    @FeebleBird903 5 лет назад +5063

    If I ever wrote the line, "Luke kills another Snoke" I would immediately stop and delete the entire script.

    • @cadenglass1387
      @cadenglass1387 5 лет назад +202

      .... it is the plot to monsters vs aliens

    • @KOTEBANAROT
      @KOTEBANAROT 5 лет назад +153

      this will happen in Star War Two

    • @carodame9419
      @carodame9419 5 лет назад +68

      that's some good instincts u got there

    • @Margolias
      @Margolias 5 лет назад +107

      Then you are a coward.

    • @soyouresaying7814
      @soyouresaying7814 5 лет назад +44

      It's Like Poetry, They Rhyme...

  • @carodame9419
    @carodame9419 5 лет назад +6440

    "a younger, muscular and even handsome figure that we recognise as Snoke" is the most cursed sentences I ever heard

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +294

      I feel like ADF has some...interesting thoughts about Snoke after reading that.

    • @sdagoth3037
      @sdagoth3037 5 лет назад +440

      He was a big man.

    • @z-beeblebrox
      @z-beeblebrox 5 лет назад +461

      Basically it's Handsome Squidward in the shape of Snoke

    • @stranger59
      @stranger59 5 лет назад +134

      There will be fanfiction of this. And his hair will be GLORIOUS.

    • @cartoonishidealism582
      @cartoonishidealism582 5 лет назад +100

      Daddy Snokey

  • @valdisv4892
    @valdisv4892 5 лет назад +6265

    "Snoke, I'm very concerned with your behaviour. Come meet me at the chemical factory so we can discuss it further" -Obi-Wan

    • @patrickchoque7720
      @patrickchoque7720 5 лет назад +231

      😭😭😭 oh godddd rip muscle Snoke

    • @wenbluepirate3954
      @wenbluepirate3954 4 года назад +156

      @@patrickchoque7720 rip ripped snoke

    • @izzysauls7737
      @izzysauls7737 4 года назад +201

      I can only imagine that this is a text sent through the Star Wars equivalent of Facebook messenger

    • @violatyrant
      @violatyrant 4 года назад +145

      it’s significantly funnier when u take into account that obi-wan would be literally a teenager bc he’s like 20 in ep 1

    • @starduststriker8792
      @starduststriker8792 3 года назад +119

      @@violatyrant obi-wan conducts force bible studies in the chemical factory so it was the first place he thought of

  • @NotTheAntichrist
    @NotTheAntichrist Год назад +862

    I like that Rey has to throw Luke a light saber when there are presumably hundreds of light sabers all over the floor from all the dead snokes.

    • @Zurrke
      @Zurrke 4 месяца назад +30

      Not only that, but as Jenny said, is there not a way for Luke to almost magically put any of the available sabers into his hand almost instantly?

    • @robcrowe11
      @robcrowe11 4 месяца назад +5

      I want to see that scene! Plus Lea and Rey saying, did a VERY Mature Fanboy write this?

    • @idiotcube
      @idiotcube 3 месяца назад +22

      @@Zurrke The Force theme swells triumphantly as Luke forms a Katamari ball of lightsabers around himself.

    • @Snottle1
      @Snottle1 2 месяца назад +3

      Any way to get their digs in, the insecurity is palpable.

    • @Zurrke
      @Zurrke 2 месяца назад +5

      @@idiotcube a veritable dervish, if you will

  • @rnezz1310
    @rnezz1310 5 лет назад +5215

    the confidence to say to a published article "oh just read my fanfiction" is just astounding. need me some of that.

    • @ColdHawk
      @ColdHawk 5 лет назад +240

      BE CAREFUL ICARUS!

    • @violatyrant
      @violatyrant 5 лет назад +309

      same energy as that girl who handed out flyers for her fanfiction at a train station in middle school

    • @jessicasoucy6474
      @jessicasoucy6474 5 лет назад +106

      This is some Tina Belcher energy

    • @PassiveNights
      @PassiveNights 5 лет назад +67

      To be fair, his Splinter of the Mind’s Eye is the first official piece of Star Wars media

    • @adriox23
      @adriox23 4 года назад +91

      R_ Nezz if you’re a professional, it’s not called fanfiction. It’s called “a treatment”

  • @zoe_astra
    @zoe_astra 5 лет назад +3873

    Imagine if the whole movie was just everyone passive-aggressively bullying Poe, constantly sending him on pointless missions just to get him out of the way.
    It just turns into Mean Girls.

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +327

      It ends with Hux getting pushed in front of a space bus 😂

    • @ghostgabe81
      @ghostgabe81 5 лет назад +108

      You can't sit with us

    • @kristaygayle
      @kristaygayle 5 лет назад +97

      Or a Parks and Rec situation where Poe becomes the Jerry of the group

    • @yaliztrinidad4571
      @yaliztrinidad4571 5 лет назад +12

      Zoe I haven’t even seen the new one but I vote to replace it with this

    • @love2grovel72
      @love2grovel72 5 лет назад +4

      invader zim

  • @PinkSkunkSleepy
    @PinkSkunkSleepy 5 лет назад +5683

    Good thing they didn't do that silly Snoke clone thing in the real movie ha ha

    • @PolarPhantom
      @PolarPhantom 5 лет назад +451

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAkillmeHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

    • @catmun5387
      @catmun5387 4 года назад +47

      Ehhh. At least it kinda worked

    • @jacobmaher7201
      @jacobmaher7201 4 года назад +422

      Cat Mun Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhh did it though?

    • @eido4220
      @eido4220 4 года назад +282

      Jacob Maher it did not

    • @stanconnorstan4266
      @stanconnorstan4266 4 года назад +185

      I saw it after this video...I was genuinely concerned over it morphing into a story that vaguely resembled this

  • @superonions22
    @superonions22 4 года назад +6151

    “I really want to know what a sober R2 looks like”
    So would R2’s wife and kids 😔

    • @NutellaMosley
      @NutellaMosley 3 года назад +194

      That's scarily in character for R2D2

    • @Picking.a.name.is.hard1
      @Picking.a.name.is.hard1 3 года назад +84

      So would C3PO tbh

    • @OtseisRagnarok
      @OtseisRagnarok 3 года назад +196

      @@Picking.a.name.is.hard1 you mean 3PO isn't R2's wife?

    • @Picking.a.name.is.hard1
      @Picking.a.name.is.hard1 3 года назад +88

      @@OtseisRagnarok I mean he's his husband, I would say.

    • @Phourc
      @Phourc 3 года назад +60

      Glad I'm not the only one who took that to mean that at all other times, R2 is just completely smashed haha.

  • @darealslimshady702
    @darealslimshady702 3 года назад +3391

    han solos ghost appears during the battle and delivers a final line: “snokes… why’d it have to be snokes” before putting on a strangely out of place looking fedora

    • @adamgreenspan4988
      @adamgreenspan4988 3 года назад +352

      And then the ghost of Mace Windu shows up and yells, “I want these m*****f***in’ Snokes off this m*****f***in’ planet!”

    • @thedestroyasystem
      @thedestroyasystem 3 года назад +192

      @@adamgreenspan4988 he’s not even in a robe. It’s just Jackson in his street clothes, wielding a lightsaber

    • @carolb8974
      @carolb8974 3 года назад +92

      A scene from the lego version of this screenplay

    • @unicornman147
      @unicornman147 3 года назад +19

      @@adamgreenspan4988 "Enough is ENOUGH! I have HAD it with these motherfucking Snokes on this motherfucking astral plane!"

    • @yeethittter1285
      @yeethittter1285 2 года назад +13

      Lego Star Wars

  • @sweettea-ms7ex
    @sweettea-ms7ex 5 лет назад +4705

    I imagine that theres 11 curtains and each one has a snoke behind it and everytime one get killed they all start gigging. And they're like "he's gonna be so surprised by this".

    • @BinaryPrime
      @BinaryPrime 5 лет назад +236

      I pictured the scene from The Matrix where Neo is in a park and tons of Agent Smiths are flooding into the court and Neo is hitting them all with a pole, but with Snokes, Luke, and spinny light sabers.

    • @crosseightyeight
      @crosseightyeight 5 лет назад +100

      I imagine them arguing over who's next, like in "The Coneheads."
      "You're next!"
      "No, he's next!!"

    • @sweettea-ms7ex
      @sweettea-ms7ex 5 лет назад +140

      @@crosseightyeight you think they would hang with each other. Like picture snoke saying this at the table, "pass the blue milk please." And then another would say, "this is my blue milk go find your own." It's ten times as funny if you imagine them saying it dramatically.

    • @greenyawgmoth
      @greenyawgmoth 5 лет назад +15

      @@BinaryPrime This is exactly what I pictured too. This whole thing is kind of "what if The Matrix sequels but with lightsabers?"

    • @dasfowler
      @dasfowler 5 лет назад +5

      @@sweettea-ms7ex And then one of them is Greg Kinnear.

  • @ewok0075
    @ewok0075 5 лет назад +6444

    I love how Kylo is racist against robot part people when just two films earlier he was the archbishop of the church of Vader.

    • @ShaunCheah
      @ShaunCheah 5 лет назад +878

      When you're just out of a breakup and you can't stand that thought of your ex or anyone like him.

    • @silverkyre
      @silverkyre 5 лет назад +306

      Yeah I kept thinking that he would just like Rey even more if he found out she was part droid.

    • @guyr3618
      @guyr3618 5 лет назад +517

      "Part-droid. Hybrid. Monster. WILL YOU MARRY ME?!"

    • @ThreadBomb
      @ThreadBomb 5 лет назад +117

      @@guyr3618 I lol'd. Classic Kylo.

    • @AndromedaKai
      @AndromedaKai 5 лет назад +186

      This comment had me crying, archbishop of the church of Vader lol I'm dead

  • @Gluck987
    @Gluck987 4 года назад +2614

    I love the origin story of Snoke as, like, a 1950's neighborhood bully, stomping around town in his letterman jacket and menacing shopkeepers with his butterfly knife.

    • @alexturlais8558
      @alexturlais8558 3 года назад +225

      The Obi wan movie is just going to be him at 14, planning how he can prank Snoke into going to a chemicals factory.

    • @imonlysleeping4491
      @imonlysleeping4491 3 года назад +68

      Tunnel snakes rule!

    • @HyenaDandy
      @HyenaDandy 3 года назад +42

      Maybe he can hang out at the 1950s Diner from thje prequels.

    • @ashikjaman1940
      @ashikjaman1940 3 года назад +33

      Don't forget that time he got Joker'd

    • @archiermanilo23
      @archiermanilo23 2 года назад +14

      Out of all three of Obi Wan's nemises Snoke has the lamest backstory.

  • @joemcginnis5214
    @joemcginnis5214 5 лет назад +844

    So reys backstory is she had a lumpy head and because of her goofy head shape her parents left her ... omg I can’t stop laughing

    • @captainnermy5608
      @captainnermy5608 5 лет назад +190

      Joe Mcginnis “I’m sorry, my daughter, your head is just too lumpy, we’re abandoning you.”

    • @finnsword8286
      @finnsword8286 5 лет назад +135

      But not before paying for some risky exclusive surgery to fix said lumpy head.

    • @ShaunCheah
      @ShaunCheah 5 лет назад +123

      I like how the fix for lumpy head was not simply smooth head, but rather robot brain.

    • @im19ice3
      @im19ice3 5 лет назад +140

      multiple alien species they live amongst: *all sorts of unimaginable shapes and sizes*
      rey's parents: ew bumpy human

    • @msmslatinclass4959
      @msmslatinclass4959 5 лет назад +39

      Phrenology exists in star wars, curious

  • @D34TH_D4WN
    @D34TH_D4WN 4 года назад +4787

    “Killed me? Yes you did. Want to kill me again?” Is legitimately the funniest way you could react to your apprentice who killed you saying that you’re supposed to be dead so props to this guy for at least making it so funny

    • @theengine
      @theengine 3 года назад +285

      Idk. I liked "Wouldn't you like to know!?!??"

    • @ardenno5172
      @ardenno5172 3 года назад +198

      weather boy...

    • @atocanboi409
      @atocanboi409 3 года назад +165

      Kylo Ren: hey, wanna see me kill Snoke?
      *wanna see me do it again?*

    • @canadiankiller19
      @canadiankiller19 3 года назад +55

      @@atocanboi409 I’lL FuCkEn dO IT aGaIN!!

    • @ErebosGR
      @ErebosGR 3 года назад +17

      Didn't GLaDOS basically say that in Portal 2?

  • @culwin
    @culwin 5 лет назад +1863

    Snoke fights in a chemical factory? Isn't that the origin of the Joker?
    The Snoker?

    • @bluezebra8675309
      @bluezebra8675309 4 года назад +53

      And plastic man
      And two face, I think
      Honestly you'd think they'd put up a sign or something
      (Edit: nope, it was a purposeful splash of acid aimed at Harvey.)

    • @ChupeTTe
      @ChupeTTe 4 года назад +13

      Snooker

    • @stormthrush37
      @stormthrush37 4 года назад +5

      lmao

    • @davidkippy101
      @davidkippy101 4 года назад +31

      The Killing Snoke

    • @sarahs6712
      @sarahs6712 4 года назад +1

      @@bluezebra8675309
      .j.

  • @Picking.a.name.is.hard1
    @Picking.a.name.is.hard1 2 года назад +932

    I love how Rey having cybernetic parts is meant to be shocking ..like General Grievous is literally just eyeballs, a brain and a pair of lungs 😂😂😂

    • @dead_byte
      @dead_byte Год назад +108

      It’s just _so_ inconsequential too. Like, the story treats it like it’s a big deal, but like, having a partially robot brain doesn’t seem to alter her behavior or really any significant part of her.
      Apparently for some inexplicable reason it makes her more proficient with the force, and that’s just… so stupid. Like, the “robot” part is basically just like… cosmetic, isn’t it? To cover up the dent in her head? It sounds less like a “robot” brain and more like a metal rock that they crudely shoved into the hole in her head, and then covered that up with some presumably flesh-like material. It didn’t actually replace her brain, right? At least I assume it didn’t considering she can apparently live without it perfectly fine, and she just looks disfigured.
      Also, I’m sure this would have also been a _great_ confidence booster for the disabled members of the audience had this been an actual movie, considering how for many of them, having some sort of implement to compensate for their disability or disfigurement apparently makes them a “monster”. Is a person who uses hearing aids “part hearing-aid” or a wheelchair “part wheelchair”? Also I can’t believe I was “part-glasses” this whole time and didn’t even realize. Now I’m off to find my full-glasses love interest to touch my “exposed eyeball portion”.

    • @darkphantomime
      @darkphantomime Год назад +23

      ​@@dead_byte my dude, as a Cochlear Implant user for the past 15 years, I absolutely think of myself as part robot. I mean, my hearing's 100% artificial and relies on processors to work. I'm a cyborg here. Also when my right implant got fucked earlier this year, it was a LOT like when darth vader had his helmet cut open by obi wan last year in Kenobi. All hearing distorted and ringing funky with my voice and other stuff sounding distorted. Also it doesn't really make me a monster, but more...unique in perception.

    • @dead_byte
      @dead_byte Год назад +28

      @@darkphantomime I mean… that’s totally cool and valid that you feel that way and embrace that image of yourself, but in this story, being “part robot” ( even though I’m pretty sure it’s literally just like, a metal rock embedded in Rey’s head that serves no actual function ) is framed as a bad thing, or at least something for Rey to angst about and other characters to find shocking or appalling, and not something lighthearted & jovial, or in any way a positive aspect ( other than as a very bizarre excuse to give C3-P0 an extremely bizarre and kind of uncomfortable hetero romantic subplot ).
      And I mean, “monster” is the treatments’ words, not mine, so IDK why you’re trying to convince me. Obviously I, nor most ( sane ) people think that, but Rey’s condition is both coded as, and is also pretty much just directly, a disability, so however this hypothetical movie treats that is intrinsically linked to its stance on people with similar sorts of impairments, so you can’t really slack on that representation when writing a piece of media like this, unless your goal is to be completely tactless and in bad taste.

    • @NotTheAntichrist
      @NotTheAntichrist Год назад +11

      Wait until he finds out how many cybernetic body parts Darth Vader had.

    • @johnnye87
      @johnnye87 6 месяцев назад +8

      By the end, Darth Vader was a chicken drumstick piloting an Iron Man suit

  • @micahdeerman8494
    @micahdeerman8494 5 лет назад +3074

    “You’re really just going to squander your entire runtime backpedaling and retconning things that bugged you in the last movie?”
    Wow it’s like she already saw Rise of Skywalker

    • @MrMan-uw2vp
      @MrMan-uw2vp 5 лет назад +205

      it is incredible to return to this video after watching tros

    • @LazyCat010
      @LazyCat010 5 лет назад +38

      Eh. Mainly Ray Palpatine (ugh) and the Snoke vat (😄).

    • @blokey8
      @blokey8 5 лет назад +71

      I predict a mournful tone in Jenny's next video. I feel the need to compose a "treatment" where the only person sitting on a throne is Kylo.

    • @zirito4097
      @zirito4097 4 года назад +3

      I disagree. I thought it was done very well.

    • @jonathanjoestarwithpluck4930
      @jonathanjoestarwithpluck4930 4 года назад +38

      Alec Ferris seriously why was Rian Johnson apparently the only director/writer who realized Kylo Ren was the more interesting antagonist? It feels like all the other writers just want to bend over backwards to keep him a lackey for Snoke or Palpetine, but like we’ve already seen that in Star Wars with the Emperor and Death Vader. In summary, let Kylo be the big bad, damnit!

  • @grahamrichardson9620
    @grahamrichardson9620 5 лет назад +2500

    I'll wait for "Trapped In A Island With Adam Driver," thank you very much.

    • @MyssBlewm
      @MyssBlewm 5 лет назад +188

      He'll punch trees because there are no walls in the island.

    • @CowMaster9001
      @CowMaster9001 5 лет назад +40

      Can John Williams do sultry sax while also rehashing his most famous work?

    • @kailomonkey
      @kailomonkey 5 лет назад +110

      I've used the term "in a island" among people who have no idea what I'm referencing

    • @Amsayy
      @Amsayy 5 лет назад +54

      Psionic Tarrasque I cant wait to read about Adam driver re-enacting his time on Girls

    • @Andidrew4ty2
      @Andidrew4ty2 5 лет назад +3

      It’s ON Long Island duhhh

  • @dollsy2778
    @dollsy2778 5 лет назад +1668

    Kylo Ren, who idolizes his grandpa, a man who could not live without a machine imbeded in his chest, recoils in abject horror at a lady with some droid stuff in her head.

    • @ckwk_yt
      @ckwk_yt 5 лет назад +126

      And his hero also had to have all of his limbs replaced with cybernetics but noooo

    • @jeyyran
      @jeyyran 5 лет назад +174

      I like that the droid part is somehow the biggest problem in this situation, not the fact that her skull is fucking cut open

    • @GamerPony
      @GamerPony 5 лет назад +44

      Kylo Ren quickly palms his crotch, desperate to hide his raging boner. Rey was perfection.

    • @ZiggyWSB
      @ZiggyWSB 5 лет назад +17

      How is that even a conclusion for Kylo Ren. His Death and opposition to Rey in the end is because of character traits, that were never established before.

    • @ThePennyVlogz
      @ThePennyVlogz 4 года назад +29

      And somebody please tell me how her being part droid is an explanation for why she is force sensitive

  • @realainsmcf
    @realainsmcf 2 года назад +1560

    “You’re really just going to squander your entire runtime backpedaling and retconning things that bugged you in the last movie?”
    Well… this aged well

    • @somedude3390
      @somedude3390 Год назад +74

      watching this video in the far off year of 2023 and yeah lol I came here to say the exact same thing

    • @nathanielreichert4638
      @nathanielreichert4638 6 месяцев назад +6

      Great foretelling of events on her part 😂

    • @TiasVsEverything
      @TiasVsEverything 5 месяцев назад +3

      Epic foreshadowing.

    • @sithdude2436
      @sithdude2436 5 месяцев назад +24

      It's genuinely funny that this fanfic predicted the cloning thing and inexplicable power from dual-weilding lightsabers

  • @fruitygarlic3601
    @fruitygarlic3601 5 лет назад +1439

    Typical romantic comedy set in our world, except the two leads are Snoke clones and nobody comments on that.

  • @mattiasmartens9972
    @mattiasmartens9972 4 года назад +3276

    I love the idea of
    "I'll never understand organics"
    being the last line ever uttered in a Star Wars trilogy.

    • @specJakular
      @specJakular 4 года назад +551

      Not just a trilogy, buy the whole Skywalker saga ending with C3P0 throwing shade would be awesome. Just let the actor go wild over the credits, just 15 mins of ad-libbed fire about the entire canon.

    • @xyzpdg1313
      @xyzpdg1313 4 года назад +255

      3P0 did have the first line in Star Wars, so there would be a certain symmetry to it. And, as everyone else said, it couldn't be worse than what happened...

    • @Worm-revolver
      @Worm-revolver 4 года назад +118

      "I'll never understand organics" sounds like something you'd hear in a Disney board meeting.

    • @cactus_juice3217
      @cactus_juice3217 3 года назад +63

      @@xyzpdg1313 "It rhymes, it's like poetry."

    • @theengine
      @theengine 3 года назад +8

      It's a perfect motto for guys like Lucas and Foster.

  • @andrewv.9142
    @andrewv.9142 5 лет назад +649

    maybe each Snoke clone gets progressively smaller hence the door

    • @SwitchelSweets
      @SwitchelSweets 5 лет назад +38

      Andrew V. Matry-Snoke-shka dolls

    • @anonymousdratini
      @anonymousdratini 5 лет назад +85

      Would you rather fight one snoke sized duck, or 100 duck sized snokes?

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +10

      anonymousdratini
      That question suddenly makes much more sense 😂

    • @retrogamingcommentary4163
      @retrogamingcommentary4163 5 лет назад +29

      And then Little Snoke A
      Took the hat off his head.
      “It is good I have some one
      To help me,” he said.
      “This is Little Snoke B.
      And I keep him about,
      And when I need help
      Then I let him come out."
      apologies to Dr. Seuss

    • @ThreadBomb
      @ThreadBomb 5 лет назад +13

      Final Snoke is so small he rides in on a midichlorian.

  • @MsDefectiveToaster
    @MsDefectiveToaster 4 года назад +2233

    I'd like it if they could replicate ALMOST every neural connection. Like, he is basically the same Snoke but he can no longer tell his left from his right

    • @a.morphous66
      @a.morphous66 3 года назад +407

      It's the exact same menacing villain Snoke but he can't remember what floor his throne room was on so there's a prolonged scene of him riding the elevator floor to floor looking like an idiot.

    • @mikaroni_and_cheez
      @mikaroni_and_cheez 3 года назад +105

      @@a.morphous66 and no one tells him the right way until he asks.

    • @clemdelaclem
      @clemdelaclem 3 года назад +201

      he's the regular snoke except he has full-spectrum colorblindness so now in a big battle he can't tell the difference between light saber colors and accidentally cuts down a bunch of his guys

    • @paisleesheppard5629
      @paisleesheppard5629 3 года назад +51

      @@clemdelaclem fun fact: something like this happened during the War of the Roses. The cavalry didn't realize the battle had moved as much as it did, and rode in killing people on their own side.

    • @bookshelfhoney
      @bookshelfhoney 3 года назад +14

      Oh no! am I a clone... because I get my left and right mixed up

  • @erinbailey7940
    @erinbailey7940 5 лет назад +3057

    “the trio of snokes” “multiple snokes” “another snoke” why is this SO FUNNY

    • @ShaunCheah
      @ShaunCheah 5 лет назад +238

      There moke be Snokes!

    • @The_Jovian
      @The_Jovian 5 лет назад +92

      *Multitudes*

    • @AnnoyingOrange420
      @AnnoyingOrange420 5 лет назад +118

      Snoke is just not an intimidating name at all

    • @moproodu
      @moproodu 5 лет назад +82

      Clown car snoke

    • @firetarrasque4667
      @firetarrasque4667 5 лет назад +57

      Because Snoke wasn't supposed to be made plural.

  • @e.l.4409
    @e.l.4409 5 лет назад +962

    Snoke literally has The Killing Joke Joker's origin?
    Snoker.

    • @Mobium
      @Mobium 5 лет назад +126

      We live in a galaxy

    • @EpoxyMuffin
      @EpoxyMuffin 5 лет назад +5

      Multiple Choice

    • @BeefBronson
      @BeefBronson 5 лет назад +45

      The Killing Snoke

    • @ironwolf56
      @ironwolf56 5 лет назад +9

      So to weirdly defend that part, that was originally (and we're talking way back in Lucas's early OT notes) going to be a possible ending for the Anakin/Obi-Wan duel. In fact that might date back so far that this was before Lucas had decided that Vader and Anakin were the same person... regardless, Alan Dean Foster has had access to those notes for decades so I'm guessing he recycled it from that.

    • @mutantfreak48
      @mutantfreak48 5 лет назад +1

      @@ironwolf56 the killing joke also came out 1988, long after the original trilogy was out

  • @peachbIossom
    @peachbIossom 5 лет назад +1144

    "He touches her exposed skull portion. Has anyone told her lately how really beautiful she is?" does... does Foster ship C-3PO with Rey?

    • @bismuthcrystal9658
      @bismuthcrystal9658 5 лет назад +351

      Do you *not* after hearing that tender scene? I mean, what's more intimate than a tender caress of someone's exposed skull portion?!

    • @im19ice3
      @im19ice3 5 лет назад +228

      i guess there is one thing worse than reylo after all

    • @guyr3618
      @guyr3618 5 лет назад +39

      I definitely ship it now.

    • @arklestudios
      @arklestudios 5 лет назад +38

      Eh, it's a better ship than Jessica Jones/Kilgrave.

    • @PhillipRottingham
      @PhillipRottingham 5 лет назад +92

      'Solo' did establish that droids and humans fuck so...

  • @chrysanthemum7391
    @chrysanthemum7391 3 года назад +320

    "A younger, muscular, and even handsome figure that we recognize as... C3PO."

  • @HidakaSatsuki
    @HidakaSatsuki 5 лет назад +921

    My wife’s reaction: ‘Oh, that’s what the Knights of Ren are. Snokes.’

    • @julianhyde1645
      @julianhyde1645 4 года назад +17

      That should have happened.

    • @ryanne.5172
      @ryanne.5172 4 года назад +25

      Wait, that’s way better

    • @SorowFame
      @SorowFame 4 года назад +24

      The Knights of Ren, Snoke 2, Snoke 3, Snoke 4, Snoke 5 and the unforgettable Snoke 6.

  • @RavielUriaHamon
    @RavielUriaHamon 4 года назад +1532

    Can't believe this guy is championing so hard for Reypio when everyone knows BB-Reyght is the far superior ship.

    • @goawaydonttalktome7780
      @goawaydonttalktome7780 4 года назад +29

      robot romance

    • @asterlyons8564
      @asterlyons8564 4 года назад +168

      You really made me read that with my own two eyes

    • @CJJC
      @CJJC 4 года назад +120

      Man, that first one is an unfortunate ship name, huh?

    • @alisaurus4224
      @alisaurus4224 4 года назад +43

      Rey2-D2

    • @victorsales4215
      @victorsales4215 4 года назад +19

      @@CJJC Thanks for noticing that for me. I hate it.

  • @ruby7951
    @ruby7951 4 года назад +1266

    Impressive that Obi-Wan apparently defeated Young Sexy Snoke before episode 1, considering Obi-Wan was a padawan and probably 18 at the oldest in Phantom Menace.

    • @orcmama8
      @orcmama8 4 года назад +43

      He was actualy mid twenties I believe sry if I'm wrong...oof poor kenobi,he didnt even complain.

    • @flygirl6048
      @flygirl6048 4 года назад +75

      He was 25 in TPM

    • @TheSleepyRanger
      @TheSleepyRanger 4 года назад +69

      It would have been better if maybe Yoda was the one who disfigured snoke. But then again snoke is so weak that Luke and Kylo can just kill him left and right.

    • @GameLeaderR
      @GameLeaderR 4 года назад +66

      He won cuz he tried spinning, that was a good trick.

    • @StandardGoose
      @StandardGoose 4 года назад +14

      They obviously followed the Saved By The Bell school of thought when it came to casting, and that's why they cast 30-year-old Ewan McGregor.

  • @varedna
    @varedna 3 года назад +644

    I love how the Snoke clones continue the monologue of the previous Snoke clones like they wrote a script. I wish they had a part in the pitch where Kylo hesitates killing one and another clone jumps out to try and continue the speech and just sees another living Snoke standing there.

    • @billygabrielz
      @billygabrielz 2 года назад +118

      Awkward silence just fills the room while all three stare at eachother. So long that a third snoke walks in thinking he's on queue

  • @MTG_Scribe
    @MTG_Scribe 4 года назад +2264

    When my son was 4 months old his doctor told us that he had something called craniosynostosis. When you're born your skull is in multiple pieces to allow for your brain to expand and grow, and as you get older the peices start to fuse together naturally. Someone who has craniosynostosis has two or more of these pieces fuse together too early, which causes your brain to stop expanding in one direction and expand in other directions instead. This can cause behavioral or cognitive problems as you grow older, and also causes your head to be misshapen and weird looking. At 9 months my son had what was to me, as a parent, terrifying surgery on his skull, spend a week in the hospital, and everything is normal now.
    What I'm saying is that the head thing Rey has in this is pretty common and easily fixable without any robot parts even without the advanced medical technology in the Star Wars universe.

    • @SheeplessNW6
      @SheeplessNW6 4 года назад +684

      I'm glad that things turned out ok for your son, and that he doesn't have to worry about being hit on by creepy golden droids

    • @ryanc5572
      @ryanc5572 4 года назад +220

      Very happy your son is okay, mate. That's such a scary situation but I'm happy he is healthy.

    • @jaegermonster7520
      @jaegermonster7520 4 года назад +327

      Hey, I was born with that! Fist bump to your kiddo!
      And side note: I had surgery to correct it in the 80s in rural Montana. So yeah... easily correctable in the Star Wars universe.

    • @torcoolguy
      @torcoolguy 4 года назад +213

      But Rey had... Space... Craniosynostosis. Totally different. :p

    • @amurizon
      @amurizon 4 года назад +56

      @@torcoolguy beat me to it. 😂 OP, glad your son is okay. 😊

  • @obrien92
    @obrien92 5 лет назад +1284

    wait. “before episode one” “a young obi wan kenobi”
    so is he 16 when he pushes snoke into a *vat of acid?*

    • @Kuroganekisaki
      @Kuroganekisaki 5 лет назад +195

      Y'know what? Now I kinda do want to see Kenobi: A Star Wars Story.

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +163

      In the Jedi Apprentice books, there was a former padawan of Qui-Gon’s who jumped into an acid pond just to traumatize a 14 year old Obi-Wan.

    • @harpodjangorose9696
      @harpodjangorose9696 5 лет назад +84

      Should’ve been a chocolate river, like Augustus Gloop.
      Snoke, angrily screaming curses at Obi-wan, until the pressure valve finally shoots him through.

    • @mathewlau1733
      @mathewlau1733 5 лет назад +62

      @@evies.1018 I was not expecting any author to resurrect trash tier dark jedi Xanatos for episode 9.

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +56

      Mathew Lau
      Maybe the real Snoke is the Xanatos we brought back along the way!

  • @Beastmig3415
    @Beastmig3415 5 лет назад +3016

    I...I can’t believe so many elements of this were in the actual movie

    • @ItsPawsome
      @ItsPawsome 4 года назад +244

      I know! I heard this the day before I saw the movie and was like "HAHA." and as I was watching it was like WHOA.

    • @stranger59
      @stranger59 4 года назад +202

      I was amazed how much they fit in tender touches to Rey's exposed skull portion.

    • @Jobama
      @Jobama 4 года назад +161

      Yeah... on the bright side, there's no need for Jenny to do a separate review for IX, she pretty much summed it up at 26:34

    • @Avi2Nyan
      @Avi2Nyan 4 года назад +74

      All the things... Except Rose

    • @Beastmig3415
      @Beastmig3415 4 года назад +42

      Wopmy they swapped Poe for Rose lol

  • @TheNumnutRandomness
    @TheNumnutRandomness 3 года назад +1124

    I'm still tickled that Snoke's main motivation boiled down to " swore vengeance because you made me SO ugly that all my clones turned out ugly too."

    • @olandir
      @olandir 2 года назад +60

      I'm so confused why the writer didn't at least make it make more sense by having it be Luke who disfigured him. Why Obi Wan, that just makes it more convoluted.

    • @zandytheaxiom8015
      @zandytheaxiom8015 2 года назад +77

      @@olandir And he specifies that it happens BEFORE Phantom Menace, so like... A teenage Obi-Wan tells him to stop bullying people, then he falls into chemicals and swears vengeance for the next 50 years, but at no point does he ever, I don't know... Try and kill Obi-Wan?
      Obi-Wan cuts Maul in half. Ten years later Maul comes back for revenge, then ten years after that Obi-Wan finally kills Maul, and still Snoke hasn't come back for his own revenge.

    • @Niobesnuppa
      @Niobesnuppa 6 месяцев назад +10

      @@zandytheaxiom8015 Snoke was just politely waiting for Darth Maul to have his try at killing Obi-Wan first.

    • @TechTehScience
      @TechTehScience 6 месяцев назад +2

      @@zandytheaxiom8015 Don't forget that Maul was sorta over the whole thing by then.

  • @numericalhorror185
    @numericalhorror185 4 года назад +2453

    The fact that rose had more of a complete character arc in this fanfic than she did in the actual film...transcendent

    • @ruibarian5187
      @ruibarian5187 3 года назад +136

      She had a complete character arc. She went from love interest of a secondary character to dejected spinster while Finn pined after Rey.

    • @zebdubs2777
      @zebdubs2777 3 года назад +1

      @@ruibarian5187 lllll

    • @aud7593
      @aud7593 3 года назад +30

      effervescent

    • @ahumbleproposition
      @ahumbleproposition 3 года назад +19

      still a better Rose story than rise of skywalker

    • @Renoistic
      @Renoistic 4 месяца назад +1

      I didn't even like Rose and I still was annoyed at how they treated her in Rise. Their approach to the whole script was just "If it didn't work last time, just write it out!" and "Actually, just ignore or change everything".

  • @kyssimmee
    @kyssimmee 5 лет назад +275

    I love the idea that we're supposed to find Snoke MORE threatening after seeing our protagonists murder him easily multiple times, it's like if Palpatine was a battle droid

  • @bernebelmont1857
    @bernebelmont1857 4 года назад +969

    "C3PO touches her exposed skull portion"
    Is a disturbing sentence

    • @BrendanMcGinley
      @BrendanMcGinley 3 года назад +83

      "Flesssssshhhh! FLEEEEEESHH!" -Creepio

    • @Silvercanth
      @Silvercanth 2 года назад +61

      tfw a robot will never touch your exposed skull portion. Life isn't fair :'(

    • @Goldarlives
      @Goldarlives 2 года назад +35

      @@BrendanMcGinley HOW COULD YOU AWAKEN ME WITHOUT MY SKIIIINNN

  • @hats4pigeons132
    @hats4pigeons132 3 года назад +602

    I imagine a back room full of Snokes lounging on sofas, sipping watered down coctails, and throwing shade at the current Snoke like in "Drag Race: Untucked"

    • @ally939
      @ally939 2 года назад +44

      Oh my god, imagine a Snoke-only season of Drag Race, it would be incredible

    • @billygabrielz
      @billygabrielz 2 года назад +28

      NGL. I'd love to hear Star Wars themed drag snokes reading each other to filth

    • @rachelppython
      @rachelppython Год назад +5

      ​@@billygabrielzthat's a show I'd watch at least one episode of

  • @bmj6763
    @bmj6763 5 лет назад +644

    "Be careful Rey! There make be Snokes!"

    • @TheFiresloth
      @TheFiresloth 4 года назад +58

      You did it, you won the Star Wars.

    • @Weirdanimalboy
      @Weirdanimalboy 4 года назад +29

      “Snokes.... Why did it have to be Snokes?”

    • @swimmyswim417
      @swimmyswim417 4 года назад +11

      Trapped in a island with Rey Palpatine

  • @milliew128
    @milliew128 4 года назад +464

    i wish c3po would embrace me with his rigid metal arms :/

  • @wat7120
    @wat7120 5 лет назад +795

    I absolutely love that Past Snoke's defining villain trait was that he was a Chad

  • @rays.1899
    @rays.1899 3 года назад +637

    This pitch touched the exposed, twinkling portion of my heart

  • @Mythraen
    @Mythraen 4 года назад +1519

    Point of order: How does baby Rei's baby-size droid skull become adult Rei's adult-size droid skull?

    • @erikgilson1687
      @erikgilson1687 3 года назад +311

      Midichlorians

    • @cybercop0083
      @cybercop0083 3 года назад +120

      Robotronomics.

    • @henrycurtis3652
      @henrycurtis3652 3 года назад +195

      Nanomachines, son.

    • @Mythraen
      @Mythraen 3 года назад +31

      @@henrycurtis3652 Senator Armstrong, is that you?
      I think you might be in the wrong place, sir.

    • @ydderynnad
      @ydderynnad 3 года назад +161

      Dark science, cloning, secrets only the Sith knew.

  • @apseudonym
    @apseudonym 4 года назад +602

    Jenny: You're really just going to squander your entire runtime backpedalling and retconning things that bugged you in the last movie?
    JJ: [sweats nervously]

    • @CodeNameX001
      @CodeNameX001 2 года назад +38

      Jenny: Why would Snoke bother to waste Kylo Ren's time with endless Snoke clones?
      Palpatine: [sweats nervously]

  • @pridemoth_
    @pridemoth_ 5 лет назад +899

    Can we just acknowledge that Snoke and Jeff the Killer have the same chemical-based disfigurement origin story

    • @brybrybry995
      @brybrybry995 4 года назад +138

      Insanity: A Snoke Fanfiction. Kylo Ren has a pink sparkly knife

    • @pridemoth_
      @pridemoth_ 4 года назад +27

      @@brybrybry995 Oh God please, I need it

    • @TheMainTagonist
      @TheMainTagonist 4 года назад +1

      :(

    • @adiversion9413
      @adiversion9413 4 года назад +1

      Didn't Jeff the Killer got his face burned by a bottle of perfume?

    • @stormthrush37
      @stormthrush37 4 года назад +28

      And Joker.

  • @chloezumbrun2238
    @chloezumbrun2238 2 года назад +654

    when C3PO started petting rey and calling her beautiful, and she paused, I really thought she was about to start comically mashing her human lips against his cold, gaping robot mouth hole

    • @eesedesesesrdtsuperjoshuab7907
      @eesedesesesrdtsuperjoshuab7907 6 месяцев назад +54

      I don’t know why, but the fact that you had to specify “human lips” absolutely destroyed me, that’s so funny

    • @Mister_Phafanapolis
      @Mister_Phafanapolis 6 месяцев назад +1

      @ @
      _O_

    • @get_more_bald
      @get_more_bald 5 месяцев назад

      who wouldnt want to smash C3POs cold, gaping robot hole?

    • @nbewarwe
      @nbewarwe 17 дней назад +2

      @@eesedesesesrdtsuperjoshuab7907 For me it was the 'gaping robot mouth hole'

  • @GioTheVax
    @GioTheVax 5 лет назад +522

    "a younger, muscular, and more handsome snoke" jENNY NO THAT EDIT IS CURSED

  • @gaphic
    @gaphic 5 лет назад +601

    ‘No more Snokes’ is an inexplicably hysterical line to me

    • @PhillipRottingham
      @PhillipRottingham 5 лет назад +38

      Alan Dean Foster (watching the Last Jedi): No! More Snokes!

    • @koboldcatgirl
      @koboldcatgirl 5 лет назад +4

      *Baman's boss roaring through window*
      NOOOO
      MOOOOORE
      JOOOOOOKES

    • @kevinmedina9234
      @kevinmedina9234 5 лет назад +10

      No more Snokes jumping on the bad

    • @LazyCat010
      @LazyCat010 5 лет назад +7

      @@kevinmedina9234 Ten little snokes swimming in a vat ...

    • @j.c.dicklegproductions9248
      @j.c.dicklegproductions9248 5 месяцев назад

      no more mutants

  • @blackguard93
    @blackguard93 4 года назад +1849

    Throne-like seats, also known as "thrones"
    Not to be confused with Grenade-like weapons, those are actually "grenades"

    • @adamwarlock1
      @adamwarlock1 3 года назад +152

      If you play the game of throne-like seats, you win or die.

    • @uberneanderthal
      @uberneanderthal 3 года назад +82

      tbf Julius Caesar literally used this exact same logic. 'throne? nah that's just a throne-like seat. king? nah, I just have king-like powers'.

    • @CoRLex-jh5vx
      @CoRLex-jh5vx 3 года назад +29

      @@uberneanderthal yes, because that argument worked so well for him

    • @Hoxeel
      @Hoxeel 2 года назад +26

      @@CoRLex-jh5vx It actually did, for the most part. Sure, he got assassinated, but he was very popular in a way that a king wouldn't have been in the Roman population.

    • @happykilljoyproductions
      @happykilljoyproductions 2 года назад +13

      Well Julius Caesar had a “special golden chair” that definitely wasn’t a throne, wink wink

  • @Dededeleted
    @Dededeleted 2 года назад +255

    I can't wait for his ep X treatment: "Oops! All Snokes!" Where the ghosts of obi wan, anakin, and qui-gon have a series of misadventures trying to deal with the excess of snoke ghosts now littering the galaxy

    • @mrh8142
      @mrh8142 Год назад +25

      Who you gonna call? Snoke-busters!

    • @TheBonkleFox
      @TheBonkleFox Год назад +9

      Snoke Trick: Phantom Jedi

  • @ghouldishanimal
    @ghouldishanimal 4 года назад +610

    I wanted Luke to fight Snoke and say “Why do you want me dead so badly?”, only for Snoke to reply “Because... Sebulba always wins.”

    • @geraintthomas4343
      @geraintthomas4343 4 года назад +110

      *That* would make this worth it.
      "So why did you take over the galaxy and wipe out a religous order"
      "Becauae that cheating little shit cost me 50 credits at the races 60 years back"

  • @caitmonroe9349
    @caitmonroe9349 5 лет назад +2116

    Kylo Ren: *idolizes cyborg Darth Vader*
    Also Kylo Ren: Ew, gross, Rey's a cyborg!

    • @blinkfilms1
      @blinkfilms1 5 лет назад +264

      Oh no you're right he would be *so* into cyborg rey

    • @AuRelixRa
      @AuRelixRa 5 лет назад +176

      Maybe in this story Kylo Ren doesn’t know that Vader was basically a cyborg, which would be pretty hilarious and consistent with how clueless all the other characters in this treatment are

    • @firetarrasque4667
      @firetarrasque4667 5 лет назад +43

      ​@@AuRelixRa Except that he was literally a Skywalker.
      Was Luke like
      "Yes, Darth Vader was 100% robot and also of no relation to you. Like, you know you're his grandson, but he was a robot."

    • @im19ice3
      @im19ice3 5 лет назад +70

      maybe he's grossed out about the part of her that's a girl lmao dem cooties

    • @MakeVarahHappen
      @MakeVarahHappen 5 лет назад +44

      @@firetarrasque4667 That's the way Skywalkers get out of the sex talk. No need to teach them about the birds and the bees if their lineage is mechanical.

  • @schuylerdade
    @schuylerdade 5 лет назад +526

    This has so much "man who calls into talk radio shows" energy.

    • @politicallycorrectredskin796
      @politicallycorrectredskin796 4 года назад +8

      Hey, I resent that!

    • @joywolfe.
      @joywolfe. 4 года назад +9

      Evil Honky I'm guessing either you love this script and hate ppl who call into radio shows, or you hate this script and you love calling into radio shows, and idk which is funnier

  • @sammygecko_
    @sammygecko_ 2 года назад +335

    When they mentioned a baby with a disfigured head in Rey’s “flashback”, I legitimately thought that the twist was: the baby was Snoke! And he is _related_ to Rey

  • @shm1wt
    @shm1wt 5 лет назад +885

    JJ Abrams: *furiously taking notes*

  • @ShadowsofAka
    @ShadowsofAka 4 года назад +641

    love how different his treatment of leia and luke is. luke returns to have an ~epic fight~ against a trillion snokes and basically becomes the protagonist of the movie while leia is just said to have died offscreen.

    • @mirthfulArtist
      @mirthfulArtist 3 года назад +59

      *points as the Mandelorian droid slaughter scene*
      The fact that people responded better to this heartless deepfake moment than to the character-driven showdown on Crait really says a lot about this fandom and what they value.
      Imo if you want nostalgia and spectacle, you should just watch the old movies rather than parasiting screentime from the new ones. :/

    • @KD-ou2np
      @KD-ou2np 3 года назад +29

      Its funnier the more you think about it, like the fact that he could have done whatever he wanted with leia as a character but maybe he literally thought that his treatment had a chance of getting picked up so he just kills her off because of Carrie Fischer.

    • @igotin9264
      @igotin9264 3 года назад

      My thoughts exactly.

    • @SchulzEricT
      @SchulzEricT 2 года назад +11

      I mean, not to be too harsh, but Mark Hamill didn't die in between movies, like a coward. Maybe if Leia wanted a bigger part in the 3rd movie, she could've not died. Just sayin'.

    • @thenablade858
      @thenablade858 2 года назад +21

      @@SchulzEricT This comes across like you’re saying that Mark not dying was a cowardly move.

  • @fish_in_distress
    @fish_in_distress 5 лет назад +207

    Kylo Ren: (Idolizes Vader, a man/machine monstrosity)
    Also Kylo Ren: (See's Rey's robobrain) "Droid! Disgusting hybrid monster!!"

    • @julianhyde1645
      @julianhyde1645 4 года назад +9

      Mandalorian: (sees Rey’s robobrain) “I don’t like droids.”

  • @ELSTERLING
    @ELSTERLING 2 года назад +673

    Knocked in to a vat of chemicals and they didn't think to rename him as The Snoker? I'm disappointed. (Also, wow, he really had to go and 'fix' the woman being good at force? What a tool.)

    • @granite_planet
      @granite_planet 2 года назад +37

      Omg, thanks for the laugh. "The Snoker" 🤣

    • @OpiatesAndTits
      @OpiatesAndTits 2 года назад +4

      Well it’s technically two face right or does the joker have a bay story too?

    • @gearhead743
      @gearhead743 Год назад +41

      Not to forget how he basically had Leia die offscreen, but had Luke come back for a big epic battle that sidelined all the new characters

    • @hanrockabrand95
      @hanrockabrand95 Год назад +31

      If he's The Snoker, he'd have to be voiced by - *gasp* MARK HAMMIL

    • @TupocalypseShakur
      @TupocalypseShakur Год назад +8

      ​@@OpiatesAndTitsTwo face had half his face splashed with acid, Joker is the one who fell into a vat of chemicals

  • @ready2cry
    @ready2cry 5 лет назад +350

    watched it last night, no spoilers, but. like three minutes in, i went "JENNY WAS RIGHT?" and promptly went absolutely feral

    • @Teopengy96
      @Teopengy96 5 лет назад +10

      Kiran K. ME TOO, I FEEL

    • @LazyCat010
      @LazyCat010 5 лет назад +15

      Snoke tank 😄

    • @bismuthcrystal9658
      @bismuthcrystal9658 5 лет назад +40

      I refuse to believe this is a true spoiler. It's just an in-joke from somewhere, to make people be pleasantly surprised when they see it. Clearly. Because there's no way even this trilogy could go so far as to have Snoke clones. That's just silly.
      I'm quite happy in my denial. Lalalalalalalalala.

    • @aarishowton8037
      @aarishowton8037 4 года назад +9

      Bismuth Crystal I mean, they don’t DO anything, so your denial guess could easily be accurate

  • @brandon8045
    @brandon8045 5 лет назад +611

    “You’re really going to spend your entire runtime backpedaling and retconning things that bugged you in the last movie?”
    Ummm.....

    • @edslushie570
      @edslushie570 3 года назад +5

      Nah, at least the Rise of Skywalker only spent its first third...

    • @mhm3766
      @mhm3766 3 года назад +1

      @@edslushie570 and becomes a member berries circlejerk for the rest

  • @talkingbeaverthing5332
    @talkingbeaverthing5332 5 лет назад +292

    It's awkward that there's 27 Snokes in Force Afterlife, but most of the time no one notices what with the 46 billion Temuera Morrisons milling around

  • @AcolytesOfHorror
    @AcolytesOfHorror 3 года назад +833

    I love that Finn is like “I didn’t run away from the First Order to just give up!”
    Like... Finn my sweet boy, that is exactly why you ran away. We had two whole movies about it lol

  • @dancingintherain111
    @dancingintherain111 5 лет назад +745

    "Our heroes joylessly negotiating with aliens we've never met" hey now, that's how this story started, and damnit if it's not how it's gonna end.

    • @PassiveNights
      @PassiveNights 5 лет назад +17

      Also happened in the new movie

    • @SpyrosKoronis
      @SpyrosKoronis 4 года назад +36

      "It's like poetry, they rhyme..."

    • @williamrobertmyers
      @williamrobertmyers 4 года назад +14

      You were right about one thing, the negotiations were brief.

    • @bebo2629
      @bebo2629 4 года назад

      @@PassiveNights Did it? I rally can't remember it.

    • @directorforplastic7929
      @directorforplastic7929 4 года назад +1

      @@bebo2629 from memory, no it didn’t happen.

  • @isaacquest
    @isaacquest 4 года назад +280

    “...but Snoke does need revenge on Rey, the student of the descendent of the apprentice of the guy who disfigured Snoke’s first body’s face!” lol

    • @thatHARVguy
      @thatHARVguy 4 года назад +40

      "How many degrees of separation before you just stop caring?"

      Spaceballs level of separation apparently.

    • @isaacquest
      @isaacquest 4 года назад +1

      thatHARVguy Exactly!

  • @tsubasamemories
    @tsubasamemories 5 лет назад +853

    Would anyone else watch the wacky Star Wars sitcom "Too Many Snokes."? Let's see what crazy hijinks will the Snokes get into this week.

    • @andrewkozlowski4108
      @andrewkozlowski4108 4 года назад +97

      On this episode snoke 1 explodes a planet, killing everyone on it. Meanwhile , snoke 88 learns how to love when he adopts a lost puppy

    • @Druzica18
      @Druzica18 4 года назад +14

      hell fuckin yeah

    • @AJ69238
      @AJ69238 4 года назад +15

      @@andrewkozlowski4108 I laughed WAY too hard at that

    • @oaf-77
      @oaf-77 4 года назад +29

      Palpatine (shaking fist): SNOOOOOOOKES!

    • @maxhydekyle2425
      @maxhydekyle2425 4 года назад +11

      I like to think that a "Snoke" is the default character that Serkis plays when he starts motion capture work, so the sitcom also includes every Serkis character. Snokes. Together. Strong.

  • @Muzer0
    @Muzer0 2 года назад +247

    This guy should have written the last few seasons of Game of Throne-like Seats

    • @l.c.3118
      @l.c.3118 5 месяцев назад +2

      Are we sure he didn't?

  • @satiregoat41
    @satiregoat41 5 лет назад +435

    “Nobody tell him about this he’s like 75 he will not benefit from this it will most likely just make him sad”
    JENNY IS TOO GOOD OF A PERSON FOR THIS CRUEL WORLD

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +47

      Satire Goat
      Maybe he’ll make an 11 hour rebuttal video 😂

    • @BlueBoboDoo100
      @BlueBoboDoo100 5 лет назад +13

      I mean she could've said that in the video, cuz anyone who's gonna go flame the guy isn't gonna read the description...

  • @chimpinaneckbrace
    @chimpinaneckbrace 5 лет назад +500

    “Undeniable Corpse” sounds like the title of a really horrible hard boiled detective novel from the 60’s.

    • @haggisa
      @haggisa 4 года назад +24

      Yuri
      Or a death metal band.

    • @politicallycorrectredskin796
      @politicallycorrectredskin796 4 года назад +16

      So does "A Grave Appears".

    • @joshualuke7003
      @joshualuke7003 4 года назад +7

      Me during a depressive episode, tbh

    • @blokey8
      @blokey8 4 года назад +9

      I'm sure I saw that title on a bookshelf in Knives Out.

  • @SAUglaz
    @SAUglaz 5 лет назад +655

    Weren't all Snokes armed with lightsabers? So Luke was disarmed in a room with dozens of lightsabers on the floor?

    • @JennyNicholson
      @JennyNicholson  5 лет назад +339

      I thought the 2nd lightsaber he used was one of the dead Snokes' lightsabers, but then in editing I wondered whether the "original" lightsaber he ignited was meant to be his blue lightsaber, and the 2nd one was meant to be his green lightsaber. But then Rey throws him "her" lightsaber and I started to wonder whether ADF even realized what lightsaber Rey has been using this entire time

    • @wilddogspam
      @wilddogspam 5 лет назад +72

      @@JennyNicholson I assume we can see in the funeral that she has a different unexplained lightsaber on her hip. A scavenged one that resembles C3PO's look from episode 1, foreshadowing their connection and familiarity.

    • @billvolk4236
      @billvolk4236 5 лет назад +36

      Isn't constructing your own lightsaber, like, a rite of passage for a Jedi to become a real Jedi? So Luke's original lightsaber is the green one he made and the blue one is still Anakin's lightsaber.

    • @ShaunCheah
      @ShaunCheah 5 лет назад +82

      If that's the case I like to imagine all the Snokes going through their lightsaber construction rituals together, hanging out and bonding like 12-year-olds making friendship bracelets at a sleepover.

    • @roguishpaladin
      @roguishpaladin 5 лет назад +17

      @@ShaunCheah I would watch that movie. It could even turn into a slasher movie - the long awaited Friday the 13th/Star Wars crossover we all hoped for.

  • @deyedrah
    @deyedrah 3 года назад +1680

    "They are going to fight for their neutrality" is the stupidest sentence

    • @jamieg1907
      @jamieg1907 2 года назад +218

      "They will learn of our peaceful ways! By force!"

    • @ngaire1004
      @ngaire1004 2 года назад +36

      Switzerland in the 1600s

    • @hatemteirelbar9510
      @hatemteirelbar9510 2 года назад +18

      @@gregoryford2532 jenny Nicholson's comment section is NOT where I usually look for incisive political criticism, but I like that it's there!

    • @ElPayasoMalo
      @ElPayasoMalo Год назад

      To maintain my virginity, I will participate in mid-orgy coitus!

    • @timothymclean
      @timothymclean Год назад +22

      I can see a movie where that line makes sense. One where the neutral aliens want to stay neutral, but realize that the bad guys are going to conquer them anyways and force them into the war, one way or another.
      This is not that.

  • @rebeccah6736
    @rebeccah6736 4 года назад +209

    There was a real moment as I sat in the theatre where I thought "Are they... are they building to a Rey-robot reveal? Am I about to witness this with my two eyes."

    • @rebeccah6736
      @rebeccah6736 4 года назад +51

      @@HOTD108_ I just heard them keep repeating "she's not what you think she is" in the first half of the movie and there was a 5 second span where I really thought it was gonna go there

  • @schmiddi5768
    @schmiddi5768 5 лет назад +360

    Uncle Owen didn't welcome Luke in the afterlife because he's in space hell.

    • @sdagoth3037
      @sdagoth3037 5 лет назад +60

      Aunt Beru thought all of Luke's friends had left Tatooine to fight the Empire or whatnot, but the truth is Uncle Owen serial killed them all and dumped the bodies in a Sarlacc Pit.

    • @evies.1018
      @evies.1018 5 лет назад +27

      Someone write up THIS treatment.

    • @SEAL341
      @SEAL341 4 года назад +2

      Owen wasn't his real uncle....why am I such a nerd?

    • @spethmanjones2997
      @spethmanjones2997 4 года назад +1

      He’s being torn apart and recomposed endlessly by the raging fires of Khorne, lighting the boundless Immaterium as a flaming pyre comprised of devastated soul-oh whoops wrong franchise

    • @noahkarpinski1824
      @noahkarpinski1824 4 года назад +9

      Its like regular hell but with more robots

  • @JetBalrog
    @JetBalrog 5 лет назад +456

    "A multitude of Snokes burst into the room" .... why is this funny to me

    • @masorobo5773
      @masorobo5773 5 лет назад +62

      There make be Snokes

    • @fukyomammason
      @fukyomammason 5 лет назад +57

      It’s the clown car imagery to me. A bunch of lanky Voldemorts with lightsabers pouring out of a tiny door.

    • @Diamondgamervideos
      @Diamondgamervideos 5 лет назад +5

      @@masorobo5773 omg underrated joke I'm cackling

    • @Garl_Vinland
      @Garl_Vinland 5 лет назад +5

      Matrix music plays

    • @masorobo5773
      @masorobo5773 5 лет назад +1

      Diamondgamer videos thank you!

  • @Nargon46
    @Nargon46 2 года назад +271

    I was pretty much laughing uncontrollably at work while she was describing Snoke's need for revenge against the student of the descendant of the apprentice of the guy who made his first body's face look kinda bad

    • @jennibudde8358
      @jennibudde8358 Год назад +13

      I had to pause this to try to untangle the lineage and I'm still not sure I got it. 😂

    • @Nalimias
      @Nalimias 5 месяцев назад +3

      "what does that make us?" "Absolutely nothing which is what you're about to become!"

    • @Picking.a.name.is.hard1
      @Picking.a.name.is.hard1 Месяц назад

      Does Snoke know about Ahsoka?
      I feel like that makes more sense tbh😂

  • @aronbrown7286
    @aronbrown7286 5 лет назад +306

    I love the fact that Luke takes two lightsabers and turns himself into a Snoke blender. That's quality 2000s Star Wars right there

  • @e1eventeen148
    @e1eventeen148 5 лет назад +769

    Snoke hates Rey cause she is Kenobi's apprentices's son's apprentice

    • @cadekachelmeier7251
      @cadekachelmeier7251 4 года назад +121

      For like a day.

    • @jocastadidntknew5980
      @jocastadidntknew5980 3 года назад +83

      This sounds like something out of Space Balls

    • @TheNumnutRandomness
      @TheNumnutRandomness 3 года назад +31

      "So what does that make us?"

    • @mh5086
      @mh5086 3 года назад +8

      I wonder if snoke would hate Po because he is kenobis apprentices sons apprentice romantic interest in another screenplau

  • @BritneyLaZonga
    @BritneyLaZonga 4 года назад +306

    Luke dies in TLJ. Tries to come back through the Fabric of Space. Then makes a wrong turn.... travels back in time! He is mutilated badly by timey spacey energy bolts. Ssssk! Ssssk! He screams in pain and anger: "But I am Luke...Skywalker!!!" Luke... Sk.. Luuuke... Ssssnuuukk... Ssssnuuk....
    He wakes up, takes a look in the mirror. Disfigured beyond recognition. "I... am... Snoke!"

    • @anthonyhenriques7654
      @anthonyhenriques7654 3 года назад +50

      even that sounds better than what we eventually got

    • @RachelAnnPotter
      @RachelAnnPotter 3 года назад +30

      Ngl, that would have been a fun, crazy twist.

    • @TheAirBear2000
      @TheAirBear2000 3 года назад +13

      Hold the door!

    • @BrendanMcGinley
      @BrendanMcGinley 3 года назад +6

      Best episode of Star Trek ever pitched.

    • @hnnh1002
      @hnnh1002 2 года назад +3

      the way that this is the plot twist of lightyear tho lol

  • @sassytabasco
    @sassytabasco 2 года назад +238

    It's kind of crazy that this plot hook is somehow LESS INSANE than "Palpatine is alive, and has been masterminding the First Order all this time." Maybe something was in the water or something, but I also think it's impressive that "Snoke is a clone" is ALSO CANNON.

  • @NamelessAidan
    @NamelessAidan 4 года назад +784

    I just saw the Rise of Skywalker and **SPOILER**
    I almost lost my mind in the theater when I saw the Snoke clones, and had to try really hard to restrain myself to a quiet chuckle about it. Now I feel like I just hallucinated that part or something. Please tell me someone else saw that and thought about this video.

    • @Zulalula
      @Zulalula 4 года назад +20

      No you're the only one

    • @erinhaury5773
      @erinhaury5773 4 года назад +146

      I actually gasped aloud, "Too many Snokes!", thoroughly confusing everyone around me. You are not alone. =p

    • @quilespiritu
      @quilespiritu 4 года назад +113

      I felt my soul leave my body when the camera panned over to the snoke clone tank

    • @austinbaccus
      @austinbaccus 4 года назад +59

      Oh, how we laughed at that silly theory.
      Looks who’s laughing now

    • @durnsidh6483
      @durnsidh6483 3 года назад +16

      @@austinbaccus No one, it was painful shot.

  • @FebreGundam
    @FebreGundam 5 лет назад +425

    Never mistake a throne-like seat for a throne. It might look like a throne, but it's just a regular seat that happens to look like a throne. The difference is very subtle.

    • @Matrim42
      @Matrim42 5 лет назад +16

      Technically a throne requires a ceremonial or official purpose, otherwise it’s just an ostentatious chair.

    • @capital_L283
      @capital_L283 Год назад +4

      The difference is if you sit in a throne you get stabbed

    • @thomaskalinowski8851
      @thomaskalinowski8851 6 месяцев назад +8

      It isn't a throne unless it's from the Throne region of France, otherwise it's just sparkling chair.

    • @hnglbanana
      @hnglbanana 6 месяцев назад +2

      the difference is that throne-like chairs come armed with grenade-like weapons

    • @ProjectileGrommet
      @ProjectileGrommet 6 месяцев назад

      @@thomaskalinowski8851this comment made be wheeze 💀😂😂😂

  • @tooprime9938
    @tooprime9938 5 лет назад +258

    Who knew this fan fic retconing the Last Jedi would be the most accurate prediction of what Episode 9 would be like.

  • @Brandiwell
    @Brandiwell 3 года назад +383

    I love how the generated subtitles show the robots beeping as saying "baby" to each other over and over. What a nice, intimate moment.

    • @Picking.a.name.is.hard1
      @Picking.a.name.is.hard1 2 года назад +43

      Baby baby baby
      *R2 screeching*

    • @rachelppython
      @rachelppython Год назад +3

      ​@@Picking.a.name.is.hard1I heard this in my head with such clarity 😂

  • @alexdejesus582
    @alexdejesus582 5 лет назад +374

    This video has a very "beware the ides of march" vibe now that IX is out.

  • @ryPish
    @ryPish 5 лет назад +481

    The pretty lights make the horshelf look like it is *IN* the wall, I was so disapointed when I finally saw the naked truth.
    Jenny, you might need to dig a horse shape hole in your wall.

    • @devinpaul9026
      @devinpaul9026 5 лет назад +45

      I'm gonna laugh when she actually does it, and just leaves the progress in the background for several videos without a mention. Then we get that weird moment when it's actually finished for a few frames.

    • @ashlyncancellieri6634
      @ashlyncancellieri6634 5 лет назад +9

      HOLY SHIT I also thought that and didn't realize until I read your comment but now I 100% want that also pls Jenny do this for us! (but also please don't feel obligated to do anything because I'll watch your videos regardless)

    • @marionswanson8923
      @marionswanson8923 5 лет назад +2

      I thought it was a mirror with a weird angle??? Though it being a shelf makes a lot more sense

    • @jirachisob5633
      @jirachisob5633 5 лет назад +1

      I was today years old when I learned jenny doesn't have a horse shaped hole in her wall

  • @willisthrilled
    @willisthrilled 5 лет назад +428

    I was expecting all the droids to tell Rey “you’re a bad droid”

  • @crome676
    @crome676 4 года назад +267

    "Undeniable corpse" is a perfect two word review of this treatment.

  • @Decapitationtrain
    @Decapitationtrain 4 года назад +405

    "Sorry Snoke, but even all your clones are no match for... THE WINDMIIIILL"
    -Luke Skywalker

    • @rachelppython
      @rachelppython 9 месяцев назад +5

      He was a veritable dervish, after all.

  • @anyakathryn6822
    @anyakathryn6822 4 года назад +618

    i feel weirdly bad for kylo ren. like, the idea of spending this whole trilogy watching him struggle with what side to choose and his relationship with rey ending with him just being a robot racist who dies like a dog is really sad to me.

  • @sylvbell1460
    @sylvbell1460 5 лет назад +264

    "kylo gaslights rey" is on my bingo card

  • @sideways5153
    @sideways5153 Год назад +106

    I am holding back tears stocking shelves at a Walmart hearing about this bizarre version of Star Wars where Po is replaced both as part of the main trio and as a romantic interest by C-3PO
    The metal man was hitting on Rey while she was sobbing over a dead mentor/father figure and got cranky when she ran off to see if Finn was okay like what the hell is going on with that scene I’m dying oh my goooooooddddd

  • @WillOrrWhat
    @WillOrrWhat 5 лет назад +465

    "Yes, add more lightsabers, it makes it a better action scene"
    - General Grievous

    • @aquras32
      @aquras32 5 лет назад +26

      Ah yes. General Grievous, my favourite director.

    • @morganrobinson8042
      @morganrobinson8042 5 лет назад +11

      It works when Genndy Tartakovsky directs. But apparently nobody else.

    • @atlasmonkeyleon
      @atlasmonkeyleon 5 лет назад +2

      "Hello there."
      - Obi-Wan Kenobi

    • @Depleted-Uranium
      @Depleted-Uranium 5 лет назад +2

      “Your move”

    • @ce7.0
      @ce7.0 5 лет назад +1

      this reminds me of the star wars fanfic i wrote when i was 14 where episode 7 opened with a fight in a lightsaber factory

  • @beammeupjosi
    @beammeupjosi 5 лет назад +1664

    "Our heroes joylessly negotiating with aliens we've never met before"
    Star Trek fans: ....

    • @krisblaise8580
      @krisblaise8580 5 лет назад +153

      Isn't this just the prequels

    • @Amsayy
      @Amsayy 5 лет назад +74

      I’m attacked right now lmao

    • @sobertillnoon
      @sobertillnoon 5 лет назад +103

      I wanna be mad about this but I can't. You can't be mad at truth.

    • @sullivangate
      @sullivangate 5 лет назад +85

      Well Jay, this write up reminds me of a Star Trek episode...

    • @PeterEvansPeteTakesPictures
      @PeterEvansPeteTakesPictures 5 лет назад +113

      Honestly, I'm sure all the issues of the Star Wars series could have been solved with a nice big sit around the conference table on the Enterprise. Picard: "We have been ordered to the Corruscant system to negotiate a peace between warring factions. So far, negotiations have been proceeding less than smoothly."
      Emperor Palpatine: "We are Dark Side! They are Light Side! You see why we must disagree! Gyagh!"
      Envoy Nien Nunb: "Bdeh bdeh oop arrr meanub!"
      It's then you realise all the Star Wars movies have been set in a small sector of space in the Trek universe that the Federation rolls its eyes in mild exasperation over.

  • @jessicazimmer8910
    @jessicazimmer8910 4 года назад +853

    "Slightly lunges" ... and this man is a published author.

    • @erikgilson1687
      @erikgilson1687 3 года назад +81

      Makes me think he like got down in a wrestling pose and faked Rylo out

    • @russianbot8576
      @russianbot8576 3 года назад +61

      you think that's bad?
      brandon sanderson is the leading author in the fantasy genre right now, but i had to fucking call it quits on _mistborn_ at the line 'and then he jumped off the roof, like some [kind of] insane diver'. (can't recall if the words 'kind of' were there but the spirit of them were for sure)
      and i could get this if sanderson was writing in the perspective style of the PoV of a particular character who was watching someone jump to their death instead of giving the character the W. but sanderson doesn't write this way, it appears he can't (in both _mistborn_ and the three last novels of _wheel of time_ he fails to give chara voice in narrative).
      no, it is even worse: it's the end of the cardinal sin of showing us the basic training session which serves as an expository info-dump on the rules of his precious magic system. and i mean precious very seriously: sanderson is cited as the reason all contemporary fantasy is expected to have a magic system with concrete rules and be a cohesive system of logic akin to sci fi science rules.
      'slightly lunges' barely holds a candle to the atrocity that is similes and metaphors in brandon sanderson's writing. and it bears repeating: _sanderson is the current standard and leading author in the fantasy genre right now._ and his writing is stuffed full with comparisons like this, the 'insane diver' was just the last i could handle, and it's less than a third of the way through.

    • @codyxvasco592
      @codyxvasco592 3 года назад +9

      @@russianbot8576 ok. That hurt my feelings. But i really think just changing it to "his insane dive off the building"
      Like are there even divers in scadriel?
      But you didnt finish hero of ages or the well of ascension?!

    • @nunyabusiness164
      @nunyabusiness164 3 года назад +5

      @@russianbot8576 okay but I'll forgive it all if he writes a Rithmatist sequel

    • @ocha-time
      @ocha-time 3 года назад +13

      Never underestimate the power of the Editor.

  • @DarkwingDash
    @DarkwingDash 3 года назад +190

    From now on, whenever I have an unexplained plot hole in any of my stories, I’ll just have one of my characters say “It’s okay, the Force allows it.”

  • @bobbyderples8607
    @bobbyderples8607 5 лет назад +455

    A Series of Unfortunate Snokes

    • @zeframmann1641
      @zeframmann1641 4 года назад +30

      Different Snokes for Different Folks.

    • @haggisa
      @haggisa 4 года назад +18

      Where there’s Snoke, there’s fire.

    • @TheRealNormanBates
      @TheRealNormanBates 4 года назад +16

      Snoke and Mirrors

    • @memmustafa18
      @memmustafa18 4 года назад +8

      I want a wacky sitcom about all the Snokes in a frat house in LA as they have to go back to college to get regular, un-evil jobs

    • @TheRealNormanBates
      @TheRealNormanBates 4 года назад +5

      Mem Mustafa ... but then hijinks ensue when they start using their powers to make things easier. I’m imagining THE THREE STOOGES with force powers.

  • @lilycore3229
    @lilycore3229 5 лет назад +485

    Never would I have dared to go somewhere so dark on my own.

    • @ShaunCheah
      @ShaunCheah 5 лет назад +22

      The dark side of the fandom is a pathway to many storylines some consider to be unnatural.

    • @The_Jovian
      @The_Jovian 5 лет назад +9

      @@ShaunCheah is it possible to learn this power?

    • @MysticKenji2
      @MysticKenji2 5 лет назад +10

      @@The_Jovian Not from a corporation.

  • @EternalGuardian07
    @EternalGuardian07 4 года назад +131

    It's hilarious that this guy is in love with the older material, but even he didn't think of bringing Palpatine back. 🤦🏿‍♂️

    • @SorowFame
      @SorowFame 4 года назад +24

      Even he’s not that stupid.