You know he gangsta 😊 he gangsta for the Lord. Out here saving souls ☺️ he is not worried about moisturizers... He is about his father’s business....Wifey was like “Ba, you gonna have to put a little shine on here “ ❤️❤️ 😁
Yuppp, my daughter's dad did this exact thing to me. Before we got together he never even mentioned his "best friend" was his ex girlfriend and "first love." As soon as we had a falling out, he started dealing with her while I was pregnant. One of the most painful things and to watch him betray me with her and tell her things about me, it felt like betrayal on a whole other level.
Same with me though me & my daughter's dad wasn't in a committed relationship.. It hurts like hell!! I had a male friend who would call to check up on me make sure my pregnancy is going good he had 2 kids of his own...i kept him away because I was sad about being neglected during pregnancy💔but I eventually let my friend come back into my life! At 8mos preg..He came to see my daughter when she was a month old..He was Excited like a New Father!!! Omgee!! He wanted my daughter to be his.he actually cried while watching my daughter sleep😍😍I wont ever forget!! when my daughter was 12 wks my friend was murdered on mother's day..i was waiting for him to at least msg me..i found out he was murdered at7pm that day..he was killed 4:30am also I just left the area where he was killed at around 3-3:30am💔💔💔😔😔😔😔Hurts based talking bout it...5-11-2014 6 long years!! My daughter's dad don't compare to my friend💔💔would never!!
Same here this happened to me and he proposed to her with the same ring he give me. I’m just happy I had a healthy beautiful child to care and love for
That's horrible! What's even worse is when they bring a whole new girl in the situation & start confiding in her about your relationship. Hell to the no! I said ✌🏼 out & left.
Yes this is the main reason we’re divorcing because of his female best friend I didn’t know exist until I discovered her. I have been telling him for 10 years now with evidence how I am uncomfortable with his “relationship “. He is very loyal to their relationship but not our 21 year marriage.
Brown Sugar really is not a good example, he never should have married his wife knowing how he loved his best friend. That really was on him because he would not let go
@@evangelistshaffer7905 some people will buy what they want ( designer clothes,, nails,,, expensive dinners...)and expect others to pay for their essentials, if, bills, food, shelter...
Pretty Diamonds so true. Mine pays his bills and feels entitled to buying expensive clothes & shoes while my 6 kids and I look crazy. He expects my income to cover him in case he runs low on income 🤔 it didn’t add up to me either
Great word, Tony. My ex had SO many women friends. It was him at fault for sure and some women too. Some women don’t care if a man is in a relationship or married. I remember a MARRIED women texting him all hours of the night/morning needing to talk to him and meet with him for “advice”. I was floored because her and her husband are involved in the church. I shouldn’t of been in that relationship anyway though! The devil is after relationships and marriage because it’s ultimately for God’s glory and to advance His kingdom. Bless you, Tony for revealing TRUTH! It is needed and so are you, for such a time as this. Thank you, Jesus for raising up TRUE men and women of God. 🙏🏽💯
Amen, my ex boyfriend was doing the same thing with his co worker “best friend” who was married. She would call and he would put her on speaker and she would be like “oh hey you guys, I have to tell you something in private, and he would be like okay I’ll call you later”. Never again, because if we’re prepping for marriage there is nothing you have to talk about with another woman that I can’t hear about.
My ex boyfriend/ baby daddy was talking about me behind my back and taking my ideas to help the OTHER women in his life! He was insecure, selfish, lazy, so she was his way out of our relationship because she listened to everything negative he had to say. He needed Affirmation and attention so he took this over my love! He is still a child.
Uses her son to fill a void in her own life because she couldn’t get it from any of her past failed relationships and due to her past abuse. Her son becomes her emotional husband.
Terrible outcome, my brother knows nothing outside of my mom and she likes it that way and raised him that way. She's regretting it in her older age. Now she's created a bigger problem for everyone else in the family.
I purposely scrolled past this 5,6 times and each time I was like no , i don’t want to watch that . I was worried it would trigger me because of some things I’ve dealt with in my relationship . But clearly this message was calling me and I’m glad I faced myself and clicked on it. I needed this message. Thank you !!
Lol he’s funny in such a southern, sweet, real, dad kind of way! I think this is great for anyone who never had a father figure, or just down right mentor in their life, no matter what age their at.
@@turklatasha191 I concur. I had a dad in my life who was at home and provided for me in every way but not in the emotional way, at all. I grew up attached to emotion less men and creating emotionally needy relationships. I am now recognizing this on my journey. My dad will never change and I have to accept that and be there for myself. Therapy and these videos are helping.
Unfortunately I had to learn this from experience. My highschool love didn’t have his mom (adopted), My college love resented his mom because of things she subjected him to, and then I later dated a man who lost his mom. And all 3 of them, used me as a punching bag. Not literally but emotionally. They wanted me to be the love they never received from their mother. And I can’t replace anyone’s mom. It was too much to carry. Left me drained and abused.
Girl!! I dealt with the same thing. I just recently broke up with my man yesterday. He lost his mother 14 years ago and he uses the excuse into why he’s the he is and I’m like i can’t fulfill your mother shoes but I can give you the love that I know and I’m automatically a good woman because I am raised by women in my family. I do miss him and I do feel bad for throngs I said but I couldn’t deal with the emotions and the talks that he would hav with me and the in and out communication
Yes it is a danger zone. I think men are more guilty of this than women. I thought I had a genuine friendship with many men. They all was scheming the whole time 🤷🤦
Another great lecture! I’ve dumped several because of “friends” and lack of boundaries with family members to where it impeded on our relationship. I’m glad I walked away. Thanks Tony for confirming what my intuition was telling me.
Wow, this lady was trying to keep her position! I am so glad, I am done with my baby daddy! He either WANT HER or she WANT HIM! I needed to hear this message.
Love this video ! As a Mother of 2 young men , raised them alone. Father was gone 85% of the time and didn't know how to be a father. I began raising them from the start to be respectful to all women and to treat them the way they would want a guy to treat me or their sister. Especially being in a 14 year relationship with their dad that I allowed to undervalue me the majority of the relationship. So knowing how that felt. I wanted to make sure when I left their dad that my main Focus was working on my relationship with God and loving myself and making sure my kids would understand the importance of valuing themselves. As well as treating others the way they want to be treated. Watching my Young Men grow into adult men and seeing how they treat me , their sister , young ladies and women in general warms my heart . Many friends and associates have asked how did I do it. I said all that to say A Good Mother would not want her son to neglect a wife or his family for her own selfish gain........ When you raise them purely and properly they will not forget about you PERIODT.
Thank you Tony!!! The lessons I have learned from you: 1) If I am NOT calm he cannot hear me 2) These women "friends" are a fan club for a rock botton self esteem. Their flattery is perceived differently than my encouragement. 3) Boundaries and priorities must be made. If not abided by I am gone. I went through this and suffered emotionally. Now I know my worth and he has stopped these behaviors.....for now. I am watching.
hey, hey, sis, your comment hits so close to home with me, wow! How are you doing these days, basically 2 y later? What's his situation with all those "just friends"? I wanted to really touch upon the 2nd point that you made. How their flattery he perceives differently than your encouragement! That is so so true! I'm trying to be a supportive gf for my bf, but somehow assurances and validation from his "just friends" club he receives and perceives differently, definitely adding so much more value to it! Unfortunately to me and to us, as a couple, because those last friends are not friends of our relationship, but to him exclusively. I wonder what voids are being filled in him and if there is anything I can do to fix this situation in any way. He is emotionally very attached to those friends, especially one of them, married woman with children in their late teens. My bf seems to be needing and receiving something from her that truly lights him up. IDK is there anything I can do, he values her feelings more than mine, that is sure. Can you please share any advice and insight to me please? And what else to do, besides walking away, then bf doesn't put boundaries for those friends?
God has blessed my womb with one son and I would never feel comfortable with my son neglecting his wife because he feels he has to give me everything. As a matter of fact, I'm raising him to be a good husband to someone else. I wouldn't even ask him for anything because he has a responsibility to his family. Besides, God has blessed me with a career to provide for myself. The Bible states that, a man is supposed to cleave to his wife. I feel mothers who insist on being leeches to their children are wicked.
Amen... I only have two children, a daughter and a son. My son is and has been married for ten years. When a man gets a wife, he cleaves to his wife. I am proud. They have a good relationship and I know it takes work but they are doing.😊
My ex man does for his mom BUT she doesn't make him level up, or accountable for his actions. Our dilemma was when I required him to man up it was an issue. That's why he's an ex. Keeping it moving in Nj
I had dated a guy from Jersey City and he could not live by himself he always needed to live with the woman and he was not a mama's boy but was like a grown boy 71 years old and acted like a child but look like a grown man
I was involved with a mama's boy.. in the beginning the mom loved me..she thought i would be her son's doormat..when i required her son to be a grown ass man..ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE😏
36:17🔥 44:08🔥🔥Thank you!!! I’ve been saying this for the longest. It’s nice to see a mature man speaking this knowledge to the public so all other men can hear. So many of them will fight you over this and call you “insecure”. Females who are not blood related and strictly business related are not necessary when he’s in a relationship period !!Thank you Tony!!!
This past week it all blew up in my face. l’ve always had this gut feeling something was not right when it came to this best friend relationship my ex has with this female. I would always express my concerns and no matter how much we would talk about this best friend relationship I still wouldn’t feel right. He is enlisted in the military. He took leave to visit family and friends. He told me that we would go together to visit this female best friend so I could feel reassured that nothing was going on between the two. A couple of days later he went behind my back and was at this females house watching a movie with her. I found out from a friend. If my friend would have never let me know he would’ve kept it a secret. You can’t trust your man having a female best friend. Ya just can’t.
Tony is so right there is no such thing as a female or male friend when ur in a relationship or married that’s a disaster waiting to happen eventually I know from my own experience that’s why at this point I’m just working on me getting myself together and gaining new knowledge from Tony each day he is a blessing in disguise!!!!!👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽🙂🙂🙂🙂
When you say there is no such thing as a male or female friend.i want to cry.i realise after that 3 woman I met and he introduced them to me one by one are all his exes.
I have to totally agree-I never wanted to believe this because I ALWAYS try to operate in Godly integrity. One of my married, “spiritual brothers” with whom I met/knew his wife, attempted to come on to me while I was going through the grieving process of the loss of a loved one. He WAITED until I was in a “vulnerable” place after knowing me for YEARS to “try” to make his move. I was devastated. But thankfully , it DID NOT WORK. So I had to cut him off and cut him loose and haven’t spoken to him since. Unfortunately, I lost a long-standing sister/brother-like friendship.
I love how he HONORS his wife!!! I want that kind of devotion in a man; I've seen that in former players and it's real. I will keep doing my inner work and pray to God for the rest...
I have def been guilty of this. Treating men like they are a celebrity 🤷🤦 didnt even realize it was wrong until I started listening to you Tony! Not in 2020 & going forward though 🅿💯
WOW! This video hit so close to home. When he started speaking about the way a mother will drain her son and manipulate her son and also past that point wow he hit everything right on the nail.
@@Kimberlyn308 you are completely right queen and thank you for the encouragement. I am healing and the realization is just reinforcement of how much work I have to do.
God bless you Tony. This is so true. Women shouldn't compete with the mother or sisters. But, if that man don't defend you from the family women, it's time to move on! 😒
I remember when my ex told me about his amazing female friend. He told me he loves her personality and that he never met such a fantastic woman!? He wanted me to chase him and compete with every woman in his life. It was just the beginning of our relationship and also the end of it... I'm feeling blessed that I have listened to my intuition and showed him where is the door!!
Oh my gah... trusting my intuitions.. need to walk away now.. .. he has couple of friends.. he doesn't want to.let go.. he also.. cheated with his first wife.. a cheater is always a cheater!!
I know one that is always saying every woman wants him and has been cheated on by 2 wives and he has this one secretary that gives his church money she does all his paperwork but she thought they were in a relationship and he had to tell her he wasn’t into her like that it’s so sad she cried
Wow you exposed three problems in my life that I didn’t realize came from being violated at a young age. I did everything wrong. My husband’s sisters had my back more than he did. His mother was his rider, she’s down for whatever he spews out good or bad. Many take away from this video, and I see what I need to work on as well. My husband had an attitude as if I owed him something. He wasn’t grateful for the help I provided either. He put on in front of his fam, but he had no time for me behind closed doors.
My ex lost his mom at 14 and his sister stepped into the mother role!! She had 7 kids of her own and pretty much raised and grew up with her kids too! They are super close! She told me she's gonna always be big sister! Yep controlling and manipulative AF! He had to check in constantly, he dropped everything for his neices and nephews more than for his kids! He had to go get his sunday dinner plate and on paydays he had to give her and even them money! I knew I couldn't compete with that! He had to be the one to set the boundary! He didnt see an issue with any of that and that's why I had an issue and he became my ex!!
Yes Mr.Gaskins always be Confident, never compete with friend girls!! Every couple sets their own tone to the relationship.Some men are just to insecure n Narcissistic, they only survive on constant attention from whoever, especially women. It always turns my stomach n is a immediate turnoff if I hear someone say a woman is competing with a mother--or--- dont try to be your man's momma. To me that's a sick thought!! Sometimes things are just what they are, Poorly raised men boys!! No explanation is needed why, it is what it is💯
My mother warned me before I married a “Momma’s Boy”... cause she worked with his mother...!But 1 thing my mother never did and that’s mettle in my marriage after I got married...she only would answer me if I ask her a question... but I realized his mother was jealous of our relationship as a married couple... the marriage was a mess and after 14 years it ended cause I couldn’t handle the “Mess”... going to church every Sunday, Wednesday, and special holidays❣️I didn’t even like being around my Mother-in-law after a while then we argued 1 day... then it was never repairable afterwards...So yes I love my daughter-in-law... I don’t mettle in their business ❣️
Tony you have hit the nail on the head!! I am learning sooo much from you. Pretty much confirming what I knew, but didn’t word it as you have. I am in tears. Thank you, May our good Lord continue to bless you with the wisdom to share with us.
My ex has a dysfunctional relationship with his mother and his male friends tell him to do more, never encouraging him to get married or take our relationship to another level. In fact they bash marriage and now so does he. I tried, but I’m done, I don’t got time to raise no grown-boy! His sisters and momma thinks he’s god’s gift to women and can do no wrong. Thankful that God is no respecter of persons! Amen. He also has tons of women ‘friends’ and told me that so many years of their friendship over me, he won’t give up and also said I am insecure if I have a problem with that! Jerk! My husband that passed away was 10 times the man That he was. :(
Yes Ladies give your husband facials!!!! Look at Tony Gaskins all glowed up. Thank you Mrs. Shari Gaskins. "LOL ….TG said twerking over the food". Yes sir Tony Gaskins, a man that will argue with you about a "female friend" that he can not let go..... either he slept with her or he will sleep when the opportunity permits itself. Be blessed
Thank you Mr. Gaskins for this video. Some of us need this, so we can have a wonderful relationship with our spouses’ family & friends. Very educational and informative. Humility is the key for me. We all need to work on our relationship with each other and use effective communication regarding our issues and face it as a team.
I know someone who had a female friend during college. The man got married had children so did the female friend. 25 years later the female friend got divorced and guess what the man shoot his shot. He left his wife with 4 children the oldest is 24 the youngest is 10. That man waited 25 years.
My childhood friend tried the same thing. After 40+ yrs of marriage. Told me he'd been in love with me since we were teenagers. I know they got married because she got pregnant, but they had 3 more children after that. Now they're all grown and out of the house. Hadn't seen him in 42 yrs. I know if he'd cheat on her after 42 yrs, he'd do the same thing to me. Or maybe not. I don't want to find out.
Thank you Tony. Be Blessed. I sent this video to my estranged husband. Praying he will listen to your videos because he really need to hear what I've been saying from a real Godly man and husband and father.
What if it’s his grown married daughter? He enables her and her husbands bad spending habits by rescuing them and giving them money or making personal loans for them. I’ve tried to explain to him that he’s enabling her/them but he thinks I’m being jealous which is totally not the case.
EXCELLENT VIDEO!! EXCELLENT TEACHER!! You Sir are wise beyond your years. You just 'IMPACTED MY LIFE' and changed my way of thinking. To God be the Glory!
Wow !!! You are a true blessing to us, and your family. That's why you are so blessed for helping others, and everything you do. You're a great Man Tony Gaskins. God bless you, and your family. Hearing you talk about all you do for your family really touched my heart. I don't have much in finances; but I have the same mindset of helping myself, and others when I can in many ways. We can help others even without finances. Giving time, and, encouragement, and helping in other creative ways. Amen. Keep up the great work, and encouragement Tony. Love your sister in Christ
Tony: “Y’all got to forgive me for this Glow. I’m glowed up this morning” 😂😂😂😂 I love how you humbly brag every video 😆😆
TiffanyB TV 😂😂😂😂
You know he gangsta 😊 he gangsta for the Lord. Out here saving souls ☺️ he is not worried about moisturizers... He is about his father’s business....Wifey was like “Ba, you gonna have to put a little shine on here “ ❤️❤️ 😁
Yes lol i aspire
Yasssssss had me cracking up
🤣🤣🤣😁
Yuppp, my daughter's dad did this exact thing to me. Before we got together he never even mentioned his "best friend" was his ex girlfriend and "first love." As soon as we had a falling out, he started dealing with her while I was pregnant. One of the most painful things and to watch him betray me with her and tell her things about me, it felt like betrayal on a whole other level.
I felt the same exact way when this happened to me
I'm so sorry Queen💜
Same with me though me & my daughter's dad wasn't in a committed relationship.. It hurts like hell!! I had a male friend who would call to check up on me make sure my pregnancy is going good he had 2 kids of his own...i kept him away because I was sad about being neglected during pregnancy💔but I eventually let my friend come back into my life! At 8mos preg..He came to see my daughter when she was a month old..He was Excited like a New Father!!! Omgee!! He wanted my daughter to be his.he actually cried while watching my daughter sleep😍😍I wont ever forget!! when my daughter was 12 wks my friend was murdered on mother's day..i was waiting for him to at least msg me..i found out he was murdered at7pm that day..he was killed 4:30am also I just left the area where he was killed at around 3-3:30am💔💔💔😔😔😔😔Hurts based talking bout it...5-11-2014 6 long years!! My daughter's dad don't compare to my friend💔💔would never!!
Same here this happened to me and he proposed to her with the same ring he give me. I’m just happy I had a healthy beautiful child to care and love for
That's horrible! What's even worse is when they bring a whole new girl in the situation & start confiding in her about your relationship. Hell to the no! I said ✌🏼 out & left.
She has your skin looking good.
Right?
What product did she use on you?
I wanna know the products too lol
Tamara Keeler I thought about it and his skin approved so much
It's the love she giving our big bro the face shit just addds
The movie “Brown Sugar” is a prime example of what could happen having a best friend outside of your spouse.
I watched that movie this weekend, and you are right I wouldn't want my husband having a best friend that's a woman to close for comfort ❤️
Yes this is the main reason we’re divorcing because of his female best friend I didn’t know exist until I discovered her. I have been telling him for 10 years now with evidence how I am uncomfortable with his “relationship “. He is very loyal to their relationship but not our 21 year marriage.
Brown Sugar really is not a good example, he never should have married his wife knowing how he loved his best friend. That really was on him because he would not let go
@@scooby1970m right!
@@scooby1970m true
Be aware of those who buy what they want and beg for what they need!
What do you mean can you explain.
❤Powerful. ❤
@@evangelistshaffer7905 some people will buy what they want ( designer clothes,, nails,,, expensive dinners...)and expect others to pay for their essentials, if, bills, food, shelter...
Pretty Diamonds so true. Mine pays his bills and feels entitled to buying expensive clothes & shoes while my 6 kids and I look crazy. He expects my income to cover him in case he runs low on income 🤔 it didn’t add up to me either
You are sooooo right!!!
I must say PLEASE multiply and make more men in heart be like Tony Gaskins ,please father PLEASE! We have learned our lesson
Amen
🙏🏾🙏🏾
OKAY😂😂😂
Simple: stop the spawn production of which doesn't meet the bar
I agree!
Great word, Tony. My ex had SO many women friends. It was him at fault for sure and some women too. Some women don’t care if a man is in a relationship or married. I remember a MARRIED women texting him all hours of the night/morning needing to talk to him and meet with him for “advice”. I was floored because her and her husband are involved in the church. I shouldn’t of been in that relationship anyway though! The devil is after relationships and marriage because it’s ultimately for God’s glory and to advance His kingdom. Bless you, Tony for revealing TRUTH! It is needed and so are you, for such a time as this. Thank you, Jesus for raising up TRUE men and women of God. 🙏🏽💯
❤
Amen, my ex boyfriend was doing the same thing with his co worker “best friend” who was married. She would call and he would put her on speaker and she would be like “oh hey you guys, I have to tell you something in private, and he would be like okay I’ll call you later”. Never again, because if we’re prepping for marriage there is nothing you have to talk about with another woman that I can’t hear about.
A man has to have the sense and courage to say No! Tony Gaskins
Very very true
Always trust your intuition
Yes
My ex boyfriend/ baby daddy was talking about me behind my back and taking my ideas to help the OTHER women in his life!
He was insecure, selfish, lazy, so she was his way out of our relationship because she listened to everything negative he had to say.
He needed Affirmation and attention so he took this over my love!
He is still a child.
Uses her son to fill a void in her own life because she couldn’t get it from any of her past failed relationships and due to her past abuse. Her son becomes her emotional husband.
I saw this with my own eyes!
Been there. His mama can have him!!
Co dependency
Terrible outcome, my brother knows nothing outside of my mom and she likes it that way and raised him that way. She's regretting it in her older age. Now she's created a bigger problem for everyone else in the family.
Omg your absolutely right!
I purposely scrolled past this 5,6 times and each time I was like no , i don’t want to watch that . I was worried it would trigger me because of some things I’ve dealt with in my relationship . But clearly this message was calling me and I’m glad I faced myself and clicked on it.
I needed this message. Thank you !!
Lemme get my knowledge in👀
Be brave. It's very refreshing when u face ur fears and concour it. I just clicked for kicks and giggles.
Lol he’s funny in such a southern, sweet, real, dad kind of way! I think this is great for anyone who never had a father figure, or just down right mentor in their life, no matter what age their at.
Or for women (like myself) who didn't have a big brother, a male cousin,, a dad or an uncle who could/would school us on men
Yessss we love him. I laugh all the time LMAO
@@turklatasha191 I concur. I had a dad in my life who was at home and provided for me in every way but not in the emotional way, at all. I grew up attached to emotion less men and creating emotionally needy relationships. I am now recognizing this on my journey. My dad will never change and I have to accept that and be there for myself. Therapy and these videos are helping.
Unfortunately I had to learn this from experience. My highschool love didn’t have his mom (adopted), My college love resented his mom because of things she subjected him to, and then I later dated a man who lost his mom. And all 3 of them, used me as a punching bag. Not literally but emotionally. They wanted me to be the love they never received from their mother. And I can’t replace anyone’s mom. It was too much to carry. Left me drained and abused.
LinzToMySoul same both my exes did not have a mom & they both treated me like it.
Girl!! I dealt with the same thing. I just recently broke up with my man yesterday. He lost his mother 14 years ago and he uses the excuse into why he’s the he is and I’m like i can’t fulfill your mother shoes but I can give you the love that I know and I’m automatically a good woman because I am raised by women in my family. I do miss him and I do feel bad for throngs I said but I couldn’t deal with the emotions and the talks that he would hav with me and the in and out communication
Wow that's a life lesson. Glad you realizing it
True, I have been through this and still going through this!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 To your WIFE for making sure her MAN look good too. I 💜 it
That “sending money to men in Africa” part😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣
😂🤣
Renee N 🤣🤣🤣🤣 girl I’m African and this hit home cause I have so many aunts who do this 😫
😂😂😂 I done fell out when he said that.
The way he do his fingers on ya back, and fingers open 🤣🤣
🥴 I fall out every time. I cannot.
Lmao
Hilarious 😂
Yes it is a danger zone. I think men are more guilty of this than women. I thought I had a genuine friendship with many men. They all was scheming the whole time 🤷🤦
When I got divorced after 20 yrs a friend shot his shot. Tony ain't lying!!!!
Another great lecture! I’ve dumped several because of “friends” and lack of boundaries with family members to where it impeded on our relationship. I’m glad I walked away. Thanks Tony for confirming what my intuition was telling me.
You in the kitchen flipping food in the Air, twerking while you cooking. Ova there doing tik toks 😂😂😂
I love his timing of comic relief 🤣😂
Girl . He have my stomach hurting from laughing so hard 😂😂😂😂😂
Wow, this lady was trying to keep her position!
I am so glad, I am done with my baby daddy!
He either WANT HER or she WANT HIM!
I needed to hear this message.
Love this video ! As a Mother of 2 young men , raised them alone. Father was gone 85% of the time and didn't know how to be a father. I began raising them from the start to be respectful to all women and to treat them the way they would want a guy to treat me or their sister. Especially being in a 14 year relationship with their dad that I allowed to undervalue me the majority of the relationship. So knowing how that felt. I wanted to make sure when I left their dad that my main Focus was working on my relationship with God and loving myself and making sure my kids would understand the importance of valuing themselves. As well as treating others the way they want to be treated. Watching my Young Men grow into adult men and seeing how they treat me , their sister , young ladies and women in general warms my heart . Many friends and associates have asked how did I do it. I said all that to say A Good Mother would not want her son to neglect a wife or his family for her own selfish gain........ When you raise them purely and properly they will not forget about you PERIODT.
Sherall Reed go mom ☺️☺️
This!! 🔥🔥🔥
The Queen here having Tony looking fresh 🔥🔥
“Twerking over the food”😩😂😂
Right. Im over here hollering
😂😂
😂😂😂😂
Just no please, 🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂
This Video was Facts from START TO FINISH and Mrs.Gaskins should do a Skin Care Routine.
Thank you Tony!!! The lessons I have learned from you:
1) If I am NOT calm he cannot hear me
2) These women "friends" are a fan club for a rock botton self esteem. Their flattery is perceived differently than my encouragement.
3) Boundaries and priorities must be made. If not abided by I am gone.
I went through this and suffered emotionally. Now I know my worth and he has stopped these behaviors.....for now. I am watching.
hey, hey, sis, your comment hits so close to home with me, wow! How are you doing these days, basically 2 y later? What's his situation with all those "just friends"? I wanted to really touch upon the 2nd point that you made. How their flattery he perceives differently than your encouragement! That is so so true! I'm trying to be a supportive gf for my bf, but somehow assurances and validation from his "just friends" club he receives and perceives differently, definitely adding so much more value to it! Unfortunately to me and to us, as a couple, because those last friends are not friends of our relationship, but to him exclusively. I wonder what voids are being filled in him and if there is anything I can do to fix this situation in any way. He is emotionally very attached to those friends, especially one of them, married woman with children in their late teens. My bf seems to be needing and receiving something from her that truly lights him up. IDK is there anything I can do, he values her feelings more than mine, that is sure. Can you please share any advice and insight to me please? And what else to do, besides walking away, then bf doesn't put boundaries for those friends?
God has blessed my womb with one son and I would never feel comfortable with my son neglecting his wife because he feels he has to give me everything. As a matter of fact, I'm raising him to be a good husband to someone else. I wouldn't even ask him for anything because he has a responsibility to his family. Besides, God has blessed me with a career to provide for myself. The Bible states that, a man is supposed to cleave to his wife. I feel mothers who insist on being leeches to their children are wicked.
I know this all to well but my husband won’t listen to me
Amen... I only have two children, a daughter and a son. My son is and has been married for ten years. When a man gets a wife, he cleaves to his wife. I am proud. They have a good relationship and I know it takes work but they are doing.😊
My ex man does for his mom BUT she doesn't make him level up, or accountable for his actions. Our dilemma was when I required him to man up it was an issue. That's why he's an ex. Keeping it moving in Nj
Sis! Who are you telling? Men in NJ act as if accountability is a curse word. This is why I stop dating and remained to myself until further notice.
He is mama's boy...grown boy as Mr. GASKINS SAID
I had dated a guy from Jersey City and he could not live by himself he always needed to live with the woman and he was not a mama's boy but was like a grown boy 71 years old and acted like a child but look like a grown man
Me to i was gone and he didnt see it coming never looked back either
I was involved with a mama's boy.. in the beginning the mom loved me..she thought i would be her son's doormat..when i required her son to be a grown ass man..ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE😏
Extra elbow grease cleaning , twerking over the food....im dying laughing this morning🤣🤣🤣🤣
lise Pugh 😂😂😂😂
😭😭😭
Lol. Girl am like you. It was hilarious. 😂😂😂😂
1 Samuel 2:6
“The LORD killeth, and maketh alive: he bringeth down to the grave, and bringeth up.”
I bet his momma can’t do this 💀💀😂😂😂😭😭😭
Lol
Life Of Elizabeth Oooo Lord ! 👏🏾😂
😂🤣😂🤣🤣
36:17🔥 44:08🔥🔥Thank you!!! I’ve been saying this for the longest. It’s nice to see a mature man speaking this knowledge to the public so all other men can hear. So many of them will fight you over this and call you “insecure”. Females who are not blood related and strictly business related are not necessary when he’s in a relationship period !!Thank you Tony!!!
Exactly! I was called insecure when I know I am not.
Stewart77 stewart Right!! That discernment and common sense kicks in. No insecurity here!
This past week it all blew up in my face. l’ve always had this gut feeling something was not right when it came to this best friend relationship my ex has with this female. I would always express my concerns and no matter how much we would talk about this best friend relationship I still wouldn’t feel right. He is enlisted in the military. He took leave to visit family and friends. He told me that we would go together to visit this female best friend so I could feel reassured that nothing was going on between the two. A couple of days later he went behind my back and was at this females house watching a movie with her. I found out from a friend. If my friend would have never let me know he would’ve kept it a secret. You can’t trust your man having a female best friend. Ya just can’t.
Cheating is just so insulting
The Queen is getting you together! That glow is poppin!
Skin looks healthy.. and you got a hair cut. Don’t stop get it get it😂😂
I’m weak!! This comment is super funny lol
Tony is so right there is no such thing as a female or male friend when ur in a relationship or married that’s a disaster waiting to happen eventually I know from my own experience that’s why at this point I’m just working on me getting myself together and gaining new knowledge from Tony each day he is a blessing in disguise!!!!!👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽🙂🙂🙂🙂
When you say there is no such thing as a male or female friend.i want to cry.i realise after that 3 woman I met and he introduced them to me one by one are all his exes.
I know mane 😭👌🏼Sneaky Sneaky Situations 😭👌🏼
Challot Molf Sorry u had to go through that but hopefully u are much better and stronger than ever and know ur worth way more than that!!!!
Aranacha27 Rose I know right smh!!!!!🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️
I have to totally agree-I never wanted to believe this because I ALWAYS try to operate in Godly integrity. One of my married, “spiritual brothers” with whom I met/knew his wife, attempted to come on to me while I was going through the grieving process of the loss of a loved one. He WAITED until I was in a “vulnerable” place after knowing me for YEARS to “try” to make his move. I was devastated. But thankfully , it DID NOT WORK. So I had to cut him off and cut him loose and haven’t spoken to him since. Unfortunately, I lost a long-standing sister/brother-like friendship.
I love how he HONORS his wife!!! I want that kind of devotion in a man; I've seen that in former players and it's real. I will keep doing my inner work and pray to God for the rest...
I have def been guilty of this. Treating men like they are a celebrity 🤷🤦 didnt even realize it was wrong until I started listening to you Tony! Not in 2020 & going forward though 🅿💯
I KNOW that a man and a woman CANNOT be just friends NO matter how long they known them.
WOW! This video hit so close to home. When he started speaking about the way a mother will drain her son and manipulate her son and also past that point wow he hit everything right on the nail.
I feel so hurt. This hit home.
@@Kimberlyn308 you are completely right queen and thank you for the encouragement. I am healing and the realization is just reinforcement of how much work I have to do.
God bless you Tony. This is so true. Women shouldn't compete with the mother or sisters. But, if that man don't defend you from the family women, it's time to move on! 😒
I remember when my ex told me about his amazing female friend. He told me he loves her personality and that he never met such a fantastic woman!? He wanted me to chase him and compete with every woman in his life. It was just the beginning of our relationship and also the end of it...
I'm feeling blessed that I have listened to my intuition and showed him where is the door!!
"You shoulda done right with your money..instead of sending it to Africa to the men you met on facebook"...🤣🤣🤣
😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣
Oh my gah... trusting my intuitions.. need to walk away now.. .. he has couple of friends.. he doesn't want to.let go.. he also.. cheated with his first wife.. a cheater is always a cheater!!
I know one that is always saying every woman wants him and has been cheated on by 2 wives and he has this one secretary that gives his church money she does all his paperwork but she thought they were in a relationship and he had to tell her he wasn’t into her like that it’s so sad she cried
Be Confident in your relationship..when you know who you are you should not be insecure.. again..Be Confident.
I Iuv this: “I’m aligned for my blessings...God did this for me and He’ll do it for you”🙌🏾 (word)
Wow you exposed three problems in my life that I didn’t realize came from being violated at a young age.
I did everything wrong. My husband’s sisters had my back more than he did. His mother was his rider, she’s down for whatever he spews out good or bad. Many take away from this video, and I see what I need to work on as well. My husband had an attitude as if I owed him something. He wasn’t grateful for the help I provided either. He put on in front of his fam, but he had no time for me behind closed doors.
Its like you spoke about my life 👌
My ex lost his mom at 14 and his sister stepped into the mother role!! She had 7 kids of her own and pretty much raised and grew up with her kids too! They are super close! She told me she's gonna always be big sister! Yep controlling and manipulative AF! He had to check in constantly, he dropped everything for his neices and nephews more than for his kids! He had to go get his sunday dinner plate and on paydays he had to give her and even them money! I knew I couldn't compete with that! He had to be the one to set the boundary! He didnt see an issue with any of that and that's why I had an issue and he became my ex!!
"Swapping bacteria in an intimate way" lol..couldn't have said it any more romantically.
that should be printed on the package of lubricant! 😁🙌🏻🔥
twerking over the food and cooking with tiktok sent me😂😂😂
More wisdom and insight, Thanks Bro Tony that you can't compete with the women in a man life. Your teaching gets better and better every day.
Hey coach!!! You're always shining and its not a facial cream (that Holy Ghost glow). Be blessed
I agree totally!! That the spirit shining through him!!
I'm so grateful you spoke on this today. Getting the knowledge every single day.
Yes Mr.Gaskins always be Confident, never compete with friend girls!! Every couple sets their own tone to the relationship.Some men are just to insecure n Narcissistic, they only survive on constant attention from whoever, especially women. It always turns my stomach n is a immediate turnoff if I hear someone say a woman is competing with a mother--or--- dont try to be your man's momma. To me that's a sick thought!!
Sometimes things are just what they are, Poorly raised men boys!! No explanation is needed why, it is what it is💯
I’ve been waiting on this video too thank you Lord 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Momma’s boys please exit to the LEFT! 🚫⚠️
Been thier done that, mom wanted to compete, Ran not fast as i shoulda though. Thank GOD Im awake today!!!!!
I had one and his mom made it her duty to break us up and she had a lot to do with it
My mother warned me before I married a “Momma’s Boy”... cause she worked with his mother...!But 1 thing my mother never did and that’s mettle in my marriage after I got married...she only would answer me if I ask her a question... but I realized his mother was jealous of our relationship as a married couple... the marriage was a mess and after 14 years it ended cause I couldn’t handle the “Mess”... going to church every Sunday, Wednesday, and special holidays❣️I didn’t even like being around my Mother-in-law after a while then we argued 1 day... then it was never repairable afterwards...So yes I love my daughter-in-law... I don’t mettle in their business ❣️
That's right do for your mom but in due season. Your family comes first when you get married.
Be aware of those who buy what they want and beg for what they need!
This video was deep & good! I have to listen again. Thank you! Be blessed!
Tony crack me up with his country accent 😂😁
Tony you have hit the nail on the head!! I am learning sooo much from you. Pretty much confirming what I knew, but didn’t word it as you have. I am in tears. Thank you, May our good Lord continue to bless you with the wisdom to share with us.
This is a true WORD! Especially the part about the man's mother. On point as usual!
Hey Coach Tony and the BTF! Many blessings to everyone!
Speak Mr. Gaskins!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾love this message
You are a blessing 🙌🏽🙌🏽
Tony, be Blessed! I made it! Thank you so much!
I died with the twerking over the food!! Tony need that Oscar!! The Blessed Tribe need to nominate him!! Tony goes off!!
Great message,Tony.Thank you.And God Bless you always.🙏
My ex has a dysfunctional relationship with his mother and his male friends tell him to do more, never encouraging him to get married or take our relationship to another level. In fact they bash marriage and now so does he.
I tried, but I’m done, I don’t got time to raise no grown-boy!
His sisters and momma thinks he’s god’s gift to women and can do no wrong. Thankful that God is no respecter of persons! Amen.
He also has tons of women ‘friends’ and told me that so many years of their friendship over me, he won’t give up and also said I am insecure if I have a problem with that! Jerk!
My husband that passed away was 10 times the man That he was. :(
This is one of your BEST videos Tony. Be blessed.
Tony you are really glowing, thanks Sheri
Brother you better preach!!! Be blessed!!!
New knowledge for the future!!! Thank you! God bless you Bro!!
Yes Ladies give your husband facials!!!! Look at Tony Gaskins all glowed up. Thank you Mrs. Shari Gaskins. "LOL ….TG said twerking over the food". Yes sir Tony Gaskins, a man that will argue with you about a "female friend" that he can not let go..... either he slept with her or he will sleep when the opportunity permits itself. Be blessed
“Twerking over the food.” I’m rolling 😂😂😂
Beautifully said. God bless you and family 🖐️
So thankful for you. You are helping.
Excellent message! Kinda goin thru this now!!! 💪🏽🦾
Man Tony you blessed me with this video. I got mad respect for this man.
RIGGGGHT
Praise the Lord! You spoke the truth. God can and wants to bless everyone. Some people don't want to hear it. They refuse to surrender to the Lord.
Thank you Mr. Gaskins for this video. Some of us need this, so we can have a wonderful relationship with our spouses’ family & friends. Very educational and informative. Humility is the key for me. We all need to work on our relationship with each other and use effective communication regarding our issues and face it as a team.
Reporting for class!
I know someone who had a female friend during college. The man got married had children so did the female friend. 25 years later the female friend got divorced and guess what the man shoot his shot. He left his wife with 4 children the oldest is 24 the youngest is 10. That man waited 25 years.
That's some mad commitment but it does happen
My childhood friend tried the same thing. After 40+ yrs of marriage. Told me he'd been in love with me since we were teenagers. I know they got married because she got pregnant, but they had 3 more children after that. Now they're all grown and out of the house. Hadn't seen him in 42 yrs. I know if he'd cheat on her after 42 yrs, he'd do the same thing to me. Or maybe not. I don't want to find out.
Goshhhhh these men just do not stop!!
Thank you Tony. Be Blessed. I sent this video to my estranged husband. Praying he will listen to your videos because he really need to hear what I've been saying from a real Godly man and husband and father.
You are so transparent and wise... definitely a one in a million kind of man
Thank you!! This message was just in time
My God I am so so HAPPY you are speaking on this. Thank you Lord!
Thank you Bro Tony no women friends 💯 truth .am loving this message today this is confirming my intuition all along.
Great stuff here! God bless Sir!🙏🏽❤️
🙏🏿Be Blessed🙏🏿.
Thank you for sharing about your experiences with your wife and mother. You give a very balanced perspective. I appreciate you sharing that with us.
Be Bless Mr. Gaskins and your family. Ladies listen to Tony he's absolutely right.
Death is an appointment we all must keep ☝🏾 that’s right . God knows best always .. trust in him 🙏🏾🌹💕
I'm agreement with you that's so true 🙌🏿🙏🏿
What if it’s his grown married daughter? He enables her and her husbands bad spending habits by rescuing them and giving them money or making personal loans for them. I’ve tried to explain to him that he’s enabling her/them but he thinks I’m being jealous which is totally not the case.
This video came just in time👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
EXCELLENT VIDEO!! EXCELLENT TEACHER!!
You Sir are wise beyond your years. You just 'IMPACTED MY LIFE' and changed my way of thinking. To God be the Glory!
So many facts here Tony! Thanks for bringing that big bro advice!
Wow !!! You are a true blessing to us, and your family. That's why you are so blessed for helping others, and everything you do. You're a great Man Tony Gaskins. God bless you, and your family. Hearing you talk about all you do for your family really touched my heart. I don't have much in finances; but I have the same mindset of helping myself, and others when I can in many ways. We can help others even without finances. Giving time, and, encouragement, and helping in other creative ways. Amen. Keep up the great work, and encouragement Tony. Love your sister in Christ
Thank you so much. Be blessed. You are appreciated! 🙏🏾
Your such a smart man. Everything you have said is spoken truth.