Personally, I'd much rather a girl just straight up tell me that she's not interested in me than for her to pretend that she does and intentionally lead me on
Girls are to emo and care about your feelings to do that. But chances are if you are feeling like she is not interested is because she is in fact not interested. You are just blinded by emotion but your instincts are on point.
@@dnegel9546 But you could never be 100% sure unless she straightforwardly tells you. Like in my case: When I tried to get close, she always managed to slip away, but when I was backing down for a few day, she tried to get close and flirt. It has happened several times, and I'm quite sure it's not my blind emotion. I'm interested in her but it's far from love and I would have no problem if she doesnt like me. But she just keeps getting in and out, keeping me guessing, neither refusing nor accepting, which drives me nut.
@@aclock2 if she does this one more time or so, just be straight up honest and confront her with your intentions. if she avoids the issue or doesn't know how to reply, then she's just into the attention and not into you. i'd just drop it and move on.
My rule: I ONLY initiate text conversations twice, then stop. If she doesn’t initiate after, that’s it. I stop talking to that one. That goes for personal interest or female friends, reciprocity is the measure.
100% in agreeance with you my guy. I'm exactly the same way. Two txt initiations and if she doesn't initiate on the third chat? Game over. Disappointed? Yes but i'm not gonna lose any sleep over it. Her loss not mines.
You need to learn to read their body language. When women are attracted to you most of the time they will display subtle signs. Theirs video's on this subject.
@@antoinecharlesdegaulle580 yeah I actually agree, I’ve noticed when someone gives the signs, but usually girls if they try they’ll only do it for like 5 minutes and if we don’t react exactly when they want, they move on.
Sad thing is I used to think I never attracted girls, and I did, but it was usually shy girls who didn't make the move, and I was suppose to try and assume their feelings through subtle approaches. As soon as I said something that sounds like rejection, rip! Happened a couple of times when I was a lot younger.
Not the best advice ever. Never be direct about your feelings until she initiated. Girls likes to flirt and so should you, they’d rather be indirect. If you directly tell them you like them that creates a huge tension and she might not have had enough feelings yet so hang out a free times, let her have feelings for you, let her initiate that conversation, until then enjoy the intimate moments. Being too direct kills all the fun.
I disagree. I've had the roles were reversed, I would feel assuming the girl is pursuing me to be narcissistic, same vibe as "I have a boyfriend". So a woman may not know you're into them or at least suspects you are, but if she just bluntly says she's not into you, but you weren't pursing then it's very narcissistic. Just learn when things are actually reciprocal as the video says.
There's a book called Casanova Optimization of Attraction, and it talks from body language and conversaton starters to dark mind tricks and flirting through texts. it's the real deal.
@@cope_r3270 Me?? No. I'm just reading through all the simps in the comments!! 🤣It's basically a money making machine. Same as guys throwing money at baristas wearing bikinis or strippers. Put a decent looking chick on a video that puts on a sympathy talk and all these guys get their feelers all tingly. If she'd open a live chat, OMG these idiots would throw their life savings at her hoping for a phone number.
I always like to tell my buddies that if you are in touch with yourself, and your objective is to live a good, fulfilling life (as opposed to solely chasing women, getting laid etc) - you will never put yourself in a situation where you need to worry about whether or not she likes you like that. You will create platonic joy and depth with the people you interact with, women or otherwise. And that will always feel amazing and fill your heart. Winning female affection will become much less of an obsession. And when a woman does have romantic feelings for you, the indications will be obvious. Women will make an effort to pursue a good man in their network. You just need to work on yourself!
I agree that you should have a purpose in life and know what you are doing. This attracts girls. But I would not hope too much that they will reach out to you first. It depends on the culture, but still girls do that very rarely. At best, she can give you some signs, but this can be very misleading, as explained in this video. So with girls you should behave the same way is in life: know what you want and go ahead irrespectively of whether you think that she likes you
Same bro I just assume most girls are Bing nice I made the mistake of assuming a girl who is just being nice to liking me and it always ended with it being awkward
I went through all of this, and I finally, after about 4 months, got her actually into me. In the end, it didnt workout but it was an insane learning experience. This video has helped me understand even more where i went wrong and why she would do the things she did. If anyone is wondering how I went from her just being nice and us being friends to her actually wanting me, what changed was an increase in confidence, being a lot less needy, not being afraid to speak my mind and i massively improved my flirting just through techniques i found on YT. I also threw in some simple and funny dirty talk ("you can get undressed in front of me i dont mind" kind of stuff), better eye contact, broke the touch barrier e.t.c. The main issue guys have is a lack of belief in themselves. If you think you can get her into you and when the time is right you flirt well and give off the right signs, play it cool, its actually pretty straightforward tbh.
I was at a restaurant the other day and this girl and I were having a conversation, she was giving me all of her attention, eye contact and she was asking me all sorts of questions about myself like how I like my steak cooked. She was even taking notes!! I think she must like me
#1 She never initiates conversations but she keep replying #2 Bails last minute #3 Touching #4 No deep conversations/questions #5 Attention #6 Behavior with other guys
I learnt that the hard way last night, I broke down fr n spent all night picking myself back up, I haven't slept for 26 hours cos I'm scared of sleeping now
@@ktbecstasy damn bro I hope you got some sleep, I wouldn't tell you to change your whole life at once, you gotta put out 1 fire at a time, focus on getting some sleep, once you got that down improve your diet, then go to the gym, in a matter of a month or two, you'll get the rubber to meet the pavement
Hey, I got it!!! To be on the safe side, just regard any and every woman you meet as "only trying to be nice." You'll never expect anything from them nor be disappointed, this way. Thanks, Courtney!
I assume every woman is a lesbian even if they do all the signs because even if a woman sleeps with you, she can just be doing it because she's being nice.
I just got a book from this site, and I’m loving it. Thanks for pointing me in the right direction I’m finally feeling like I can address my fear of women.
Not sure about other guys, but when I was younger a girl literally had to throw herself on me for me to pick up on whether she liked me. It's years later that I figured out a lot of girls were flirting and I couldn't get their obvious signals. Now only married moms hit on me.
@@AppleBottomJ 🙄then grow a little bit of courage for 10 seconds and tell him your true feelings. Literally just one small moment of courage is all it takes. We men have to do it all the time.
Same happend to me! My massage therapist started whispering in my ear if i was enjoying it. I answerd positively. Then she started kissing my neck, And biting my ears. A bit strange but probably part of the procedure At the end of the session, she winked at me, asked if i was free tonight, And if i wanted a happy ending at her place. I had to do tax returns, so i said no and explained that to her. She got mad afterwards. Tbh i just think she was being nice, and didn’t think much about it.
@@CourtneyRyan I have a good one for you... Long time ago I met this girl at work. She was a packet she pack orders she would ask me everyday to help her and to get her orders for her. Then she got a job up front in the office. I would be in the door way and she would be in the parking lot and I would hear her call out to me Mark cook so I would run to her and I would say yes Ashley she said walk with me she did that 4 times what did she meant by that ? And asking me to help her everyday? I was in love with her but I made mistakes and she acts like she hates me now.
I really like this RUclips channel because she always tells it how it is and doesn't sugarcoat anything. I can tell she's trying to be as honest as she can.
I knew a guy in school who (I think) was somewhere on the spectrum. he had a lot of trouble forming social connections, and most people (especially girls) would just dismiss him. so every now and again, when he'd meet a girl who simply wasn't rude to him... was just being polite... he would end up thinking that they liked him. I always felt bad for him for that. I saw him get hurt several times because of it.
I been going toy local convenient market gas station and had conversations with a attractive woman. Haven't seen her the past year to recently couple weeks ago, and she gave me a big smile. Seen her the next week walking in and immediately i noticed her eyes light up with big smile peeking under the food rack checking me out. That made my day😁. Week later she walk out the store while getting out of my car and she walk up to me smiling and said hello, and i responded the same then she went to her car. Im a gentleman and seeing where this might go. Im a introvert but more comfortable with people i know.
Seven months later, has anything happened? Also for the record, I think waiting is not necessarily the gentlemanly thing to do. It's not like you're going up to every pretty woman you see, this one is different.
1 Is she obligated? 2 Actively messaging first ? "" Cancels last minute? Touches you/comes closer? Asks personal questions? Gives attention? How she flirt with other guys? Or treat you different?
Straight up, this goes for both sexes. You can’t force relationships. Whether it be romantic relationships or friendships. You can put forth the effort but if the other party doesn’t reciprocate, that’s on them. Those that want to be in your life will be and so forth. Relationships are a two way street and it takes two to maintain! Wish everyone the best
#2 is spot on. I cut off a girl last year and blocked her for good after we never met in person and she always bailed with one excuse after another. After the 3rd time, I disappeared
That is definitely a good decision you made. I have 1 BIG tip for all of us guys, I don't say it's 100% right, but a lot of the times it is... If a guy asks a girl out on a date, she finds an excuse or really can't fit into his plan, if she wants to hang out with him and be with him, she will definitely suggest next time when she is free to go out even if it's in a week or two from the time he asked her... I don't even suggest giving her a second or third chance... I think we all are special and awesome and we should treat ourselves like that... I hope I helped someone :)
@@jovan_jovanović_hic In my case, I initiated the first 2 times and got bailed on so I took a step back and let her initiate it. Before the 3rd and final came, she initiated while I took a step back and still cancelled. To me, she was just seeking attention and validation which is why #2 is good advice. Keep doing your thing and help others, we all can learn from each other 🙏🏻🙂
Absolutely. Technology as a whole is great, but it's given people the ability to filter out anything they don't feel like dealing with. Young people, and even some older people, are so terrified of any kind of confrontation and it's so easy to enable that with just a click of the "unfriend" and "block" buttons. It's absolutely embarrassing. All that over something that's most likely a misunderstanding that could've been solved with a fucking sentence or two.
I liked this advice. I think the top point is whether or not she asks you questions. I have absolutely no trouble talking to strangers and beautiful women much, much younger than me. I actually enjoy listening to people's stories and problems. But, very, very few women ever ask me anything about my life, or even repeat my name. So, it's fun to get the conversation, but you are right. If they are interested, they'll ask questions. Also, what you said about service/retail workers is spot on as well. I love chit-chatting with cashiers. They seem to light up when I come to the store and are very friendly and jovial. In a couple of cases, after a couple of years of this chit-chat, two different young women let me know that they were now single. I asked one to have coffee in broad daylight, a hundred yards from the store. One gave me an immediate no. The other gave me an immediate yes, but then ghosted me. I learned the hard way not to misinterpret women who are friendly at work--in my case, I think they were bored and a brightened up their day. I actually am happy to do this, but now I would never ever ask any to coffee again. I'm just happy to be friendly. The texting example was great advice too. Some women have offered me their numbers and always respond to my texts, but never initiate. I agree with you. If they are interested they will ask questions and they will initiate contact. Most women, I realize get hit on many times each day, in person, and online. Most are also in relationships and when they break up, they are only available for a brief window of opportunity. So timing is important. With all girls that I dated, I later found out that by blind luck, I approached them shortly after they'd broken up. That's why I was encouraged by the two cashiers who told me they were now single. But again, I knew them when they were at work, and even this information was not a "hint." They were at work. I also found out from a few that due to my friendliness they saw me as "gay" so they were friendly back. When I asked them to coffee, they saw that I wasn't and I got turned down. Now, at my stage of life, a mere conversation with a young woman is great and some have told me that it makes their day when they see me. That is wonderful enough.
Being in a long term relationship doesn’t stop you from feeling attracted to other people. Crushes other than your significant other let you know how much the relationship means to you.
I'm 21 now and I wish I knew all of this when I was 17. And even tho I don't consider myself old, I recommend to all teens who subscribed to Courtney's channel to listen carefully. You will save yourself valuable time and energy by letting go of someone who is not truly interested in you.
I'm still learning and I'm almost 49. Eventually I developed the ability to not give a fuck about the outcome of flirting which is the secret. Now it's fun and not as stressful
*The signs you mentioned, like prolonged eye contact and playful teasing, are definitely key indicators. It’s all about paying attention to her body language and the context of your interactions. Great insights that can help a lot of guys out there!*
Having been married for 22 years and recently divorced, it's interesting to listen to you, although I'm still a very long way off from wanting to start thinking about dating again. Lots of good suggestions. I remember walking through a busy grocer back when I was first married. When we left the store my wife told me that 5 women had hit on me and I was completely oblivious to it.
Sorry about that Rick. It sucks, divorce does. My ex-wife constantly told me about women hitting on me, and I wasn't even aware. I wasn't paying attention; which should have gotten to her thick brain, that I really was devoted to her. As for divorce...they say it gets better, but after 2 years, I don't know. Some things get better. That shellshocked feeling you get right after it is final goes away. You are angry, you are sad, and then angry, on and on. Holidays suck and so do birthdays, but I have also seen it as a good opportunity to just be myself with myself by myself. Does that make sense? I am not dating yet either, but I keep my options open. Most days it is okay to be single. You only have yourself to answer to. We never had any kids, so there is not that concern in my life. I have grown up a lot....basically I am saying that there can be positives from a negative ugly situation.
She was probably making it up. The trick is to know, did your wife cut you off before or after that incident? Some women are looking for an excuse to take an out, others are willing to make one up.
Best way to tell if she likes you is to ask her out on a date. Anything other than yes means she isn't interested. The body language, eye contact, etc that Courtney mentioned is also important.
Nope. Do not ask any woman on a date without knowing her a bit. Mostly if you approach her online. Many women are scared for safety reasons and would like to know some things before meeting up. So many men rush these things I lose interest when a men after few messages asks me out. I end up finding a fault or ghost him, or he ghosts me after I find something to put him off. I want a man to take the time to decide whether he wants to meet. I would meet him after 1-2 weeks conversations.
Dude - don't give up. Work on yourself, and use women as motivation. The particular woman that you are using for motivation may not be the woman you end up with, but you can decide to improve yourself. No PMO is a great place to start, as well as exercising. Set some fitness goals, work hard, again do the no PMO thing. At some point you'll be content on your own, and the right woman will just come along. Again I will stress this point - no PMO works wonders as it increases testosterone.
It’s just 7 days and the outbreaks are well treated and unseen. Thank you so much Dr. Aloha #Autism #Cancer #Herpes for curing my HSV 1&2 completely. 🌱🍵ruclips.net/channel/UC_YFEEZEr1BxGkNg1d4vqww
@@rick-ry3kj not validation, I know I'm relatively good looking, but I also know that many women prefer other guys and wouldn't like me at all. Validation is weak, self confidence is key
I used to have crush on my old class monitor. She was an extrovert who is friendly, polite, cute yet sometimes cold-out suddenly due to her job. One time i was luckily put right next to her, and i thought that that time was one of the best time in my life. The way she treated me, chatted me, frequently asked me questions and smiled at me completely made me thought that she was into me too. No, i was wrong all the time. Two months later, she was moved to sit next to another guy. From that time, the interactions between us almost went to zero, and we barely contact to each other anymore. After watching your video, I realized that she was just clearly being nice to me, and my thoughts was blinded by the emotions. It was a hard truth to believe in but finally the question about Was she into me is cleared. I decided to gave up chasing her and moved on I also learned: The most attractive factors men have are the confident and the will
As a man, I have the opposite problem. I always assume they don't like me, so when some of them actually do, I completely miss the opportunity. This happen to any of you, lads? And thanks for the insight as always, Court. Such a great coach to have.
I have a lot of female friends so its a tough call, but I just play it safe and chalk it up to them just being nice. Usually keeps things from being awkward.
@SpiritSword Honestly man, I don't know why so many advice channels (not Courtney) always grill us for not reading female body language or social cues right as if it's a total cake walk, when it's clearly not. lol
@@MyNameisRevenant Allow me. Closed/crossed arms = Not interested in whatever. Look at the feet, where are they pointing? If they're more directed towards you, god sign! Same with her overall body. If it's more pointed towards you, and engaging, good sign. Another good sign, they fuck with their hair a lot, or expose their neck in a flirty way. Good sign.
Especially loved the tip about asking questions. Sometimes it's hard to pay attention to whether or not the other person is really engaging in the conversation until reflecting on it afterwards. Great insights, thanks for sharing!
I always recognize whether she's asking me questions or not. If someone's interested in you, they'll ask about you. Plus if I feel like I'm just interviewing her, I get bored real quick, and then I actually lose interest.
I respect that you actually respect your followers! Alot of these female hosted channels seem to make men think it's okay to simp over a woman instead of being the man you should be. I don't need too much help in this situation.. however, it's always nice to know some tricks to keep a conversation light and fun.. I watch this more for regular interaction with women. Men and women are very different creatures. Here's an example,.. I can naturally talk about Cars, Fitness and Boxing all day but as soon as you start talking to women about it they'll lose interest if you drag it on. But men could sit there all day and talk. So it's just nice to know what women appreciate in conversations.. no one wants to be redundant or boring no matter who they're talking with.
I had the opposite. "She is just being nice" by the end I am like "Shit maybe she does like me" at the end of the day the best way to find out is to ask them out. if they say no they say no. Tell them to have a nice day and walk away. Its hard though!
@@TheBanana93 That is definitely an option when you just meet someone by accident. Not that easy to just walk away when you actually know the person, and meet them on a regular basis.
@@jirkazalabak1514 i met a girl in my college...and i am always in a doubt, some day i think she likes me. The other day is shy... or the third day - just being nice Yeah i only initiate conversations and i don't really know what to do now Should i ignore her... don't talk much or huuuhhh!!!
In which you she may like you? I am a woman so I can like a man for his physics, but that's not enough to want to date. I may like his wisdom, but if comes as cold ans arrogant, I lose interest. So you see, needs to be a balance. As with men. In the dating process, any moment you can be damped or rejected there are risks in everything. Just be mature and have not too many expectations. Or at least keep expectations low and do not fantasizes something that is not there still.
as a woman i never touch a man in any way without any intention. btw my daughter told me she backhugged her crush last week. so hugging is included as touching in her case.
You’re spot on in this video. I ran into the girls who canceled at the last minute and girls who didn’t ask me questions. Before seeing this video, I did recognize the sign. I didn’t pursue and stopped communicating with them entirely. This video re-enforces my thinking. Thanks.
Saw a girl by herself at an outdoor bar, thought I'd ask her to come join me and my friends. I started with a joke, she responded in kind. We get to talking and I forget about my friends. She calls her babysitter to extend the time she can be out. We swing danced even though there was no music, we had to use our phones. She showed me hilarious videos of her son. I was really into her. I never have a girl agree to dance if we have to make the music ourselves, but she was into it. A few hours later, she has to get back home, I get her number. One of the best first dates I ever had. I texted a few times and tried a call over the course of a week. Never heard from her again.
All us guys out there I pray you find the right women. I know it’s really hard to let go but if you fall in any category of what she’s say stop making contact. I am in the similar situation and I am heart broken but I feel a lot better after I stoped trying to get with her. God bless everyone! Just have trust in god
sadly my dad doesn't understands this. whenever my dad sees a girl talking to me he'll try to encourage me to talk to her and get me to believe she's into me and I tell him just because someone talks to you DOESN'T mean they like you
Maybe because your father has a better understanding of female nature, or he thinks women are the same as the ones he met back then, i cannot tell for sure.
@@MyNameisRevenant well it’s different nowadays based on how women are taught by female rappers and other bad influences from other women. Also I’ve had girls flirt, talk and even touch me and still didn’t mean that she likes me. So I have a really tough time telling if a girl likes me so I just leave it alone at this point
Listen to your dad, go chat them up, make them laugh and actually listen when they talk to you. It WILL turn her on and she'll be even more interested.
Damn. I haven't had a conversation started by a woman to me outside of work in , gosh how many years. When Courtney puts it like this I realise how repellant and cringe I am . Damn that hits a spot
Keep in mind in the U.S. it's the man's job to get the ball rolling with the girl. Sounds doable on the surface, but the problem is that if a woman does like you, just who is the 'you' she likes? While men are pretty flexible in getting to know a women, with women they will have a whole 'play' that they need you to perform in, and you will be graded on how well you play your part. You'll only have a chance if you make it past the audition and opening night. The weird thing is if you win them over with this charade if you turn out to be a complete asshole they may actually stay with you. It's so strange...
The most dangerous and abusive encounters I've had with women were those who were expert at pretending to genuinely like me. Either as a friend or potentially more. I've become increasingly more aloof and skeptical over the years and at this point waste ZERO time on any person of either gender who would be hostile to my morals or who I am. Let them repel from me on their own, takes care of the problem before it ever gets started.
Bro, you’re delusional. They never liked you. If they liked you then you would know and would bang them. Or they like you and when they get to know you they think you’re lame
Whenever a woman has interacted with me in a warm, friendly way, I just always assumed she was raised to be nice and was living up to it. I have never flirted, nor have I ever thought a woman was flirting with me. Many's the time, after a friendly interaction with a woman, other women who witnessed the interaction would give me an incredulous look and ask, "Why didn't you ask her out? She was hitting all over you!" Ask my wife of 26 years, who finally snatched my keys as I was leaving work one day and wouldn't give them back until I made a date with her. I don't catch hints from women, no matter how obvious they think the hints are. You have to be VERY direct, or I assume you're just being nice.
So this is the third video that I've watched and wow guys she's actually being really honest and giving a lot of golden nuggets. Not just how to approach women that you're interested in but also how to talk to people in general. Another great video Courtney.
@@CourtneyRyan what if she’s shy shy girls usually don’t go up to guys and initiate a convo even if the girl does like the guy but I’ve heard shyness can come off as disinterest from what I’ve known
@@CourtneyRyan Thanks Courtney: Time for me to move on then😢 I am Mister Nice guy… she even says it to me, “you’re a nice guy.” I should have seen it coming. So, if I was mean to her, would that help? Not that I could be mean really. Thanks for your video. ❤
When I was first dating i regretted not having a sister but now as I am older and divorced my daughters are even better to give advice and now RUclips helps big time.
This is always a tough one for us guys when actively courting a girl …. I find if you’re reaching out more often than her (even though we’re supposed to lead) it’s safer to assume she’s not as interested as you are. Don’t get led on. Ladies need to step up at times if they really are interested. Stop the games/playing hard to get etc. Text the guy out of the blue from time to time, heck even ask on a date. The easiest ways to give signals you’re not interested is not putting in equal effort.
Okay give me advice.. I like a guy. I only see him in the summer.. last summer I dropped many hints to get him to ask me out. Once I even invited him to hang out by saying “we should do this..” and he responded “yea for sure.” It never did happen. Though, he continued to say “hey” and asked me how I was. Plus his smile! Even if I was turned the other way. I don’t want to seem desperate and clingy but I tried hanging out. He didn’t make that effort. I could say he’s shy, etc, etc. but I don’t want to lie to myself. Maybe he’s acting weird b/c I’m 17 and he’s 19? Some guys just want sex.
@@AppleBottomJ When you tell someone "we should do this", follow it up by talking about when you're going to do it. Like "are you free on Wednesday?" If you don't it's not going to happen, it doesn't matter whether it's your crush or a friend. I do it all the time: a girl will sometimes ask me to do something together and I'll be like "alright", but I'll just forget about it or I won't follow it up because I don't like texting people first, even if I like them. If they accept, they're interested. Pretty easy to figure it out
@@DXYS95nah, that was hell of an opening. That’s not some indirect suggestion. That was a come and get me one. No adult men that is interested would miss that, I want to believe it is impossible, precisely because he will be focused on getting those signals to pursue. The guy wasn’t interested.
For real. This. Women quick being lazy asses and making it all about you. Actually initiate conversation sometimes. Or put yourself around the guy. Good grief. Expect us to do everything and read your mind and play your games. It’s exhausting. Where are all the good women?
@AppleBottomJ I would guess he either wasn't interested, or just thought you were being nice. Men aren't as indirect and clued into tone and body language and stuff as women are. If he's only 19, he still might be young enough to be inexperienced or focused on other things. Try flirting/giving him your number if you haven't already.
Good point about a girl just being nervous or tongue-tied. Once, in my circle of friends, there was someone who I assumed disliked me very much--until one day her close friend said she was crazy about me (but froze up and resisted eye contact because she just got nervous around me).
as someone with Aspergers, your videos are so helpful, Courtney! i really appreciate the help in the dating scene. I never know if a grl likes me of if she's being nice, cause i can't read body language very well. Thanks again Graeme
I'm a bit on the Asperger's /OCD spectrum too. It takes me a while to understand social queues with a new person. Honestly, the best advice I can give you is that if you like a girl, be ready with a short, light introduction of yourself and then just ask for her phone number. If she likes you, she'll give it to you. Don't overthink it. You can even include the fact that you find reading social queues difficult as part of your intro and finish with words to the effect of " I may be reading things wrong, but if I'm not, can I get your phone number?" A bit of honesty and vulnerability can go a long way. I'm not saying it will work, you've always got to be ready for a polite rejection, but believe me, perceived weaknesses can be strengths if you breeze through them with a bit of confidence.
This is really interesting to listen to as a woman! People (men) can often perceive me as flirty, but most of the time, I'm just being friendly and welcoming because that's my personality. Though I have decreased my "friendliness" (including touching and eye contact and asking questions) so as to not be misunderstood as flirty/liking them. I think asking questions (even deep ones), smiling, initiating conversations and hangouts just shows that they are interested in you as a person in general, including as a friend. I think more of a sign that I like someone is wanting to spend more time with them and talk to them more than other people (like 3+ hours). It's about the length of time that I'm spending with my attention on them that shows I'm interested. It's lingering and not wanting the conversation to end. I also notice that I want to (and feel comfortable) being close to them and want to move closer to them. Lastly, it's a vibe... it's about how you look at another person, not that you look at them. Does she look at you with warmth, excitement, tenderness? For prolonged periods of time? It's about the tone of voice too, like is it soft, tender, relaxed? Or flat, uncomfortable, stressed? These are the more sublte things to pay attention to. But overall, yes when in doubt, ask and intitiate a date and you will have your answer. If she cancels last minute the first time, it may be for a good reason, but let her be the one to bring up rescheduling.
It's actually quite simple. The girl determines whether or not she will let you fuck her within the first 3 seconds of scanning you from head to toe. It's either a ✅ or a 🚫. Anything you do or say after that decision has been made is completely irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
@@nonexistenceisbliss9528 and you probably think the friend zone is real 😂🤣😂 that 3sec decision is made every time they see you🤔 you choose to enforce the yes or no
If a girl cancels a first date at the last minute REGARDLESS of the reason or excuse, move on. If she’s still interested, she will contact you later (just like car salespeople do), or she will reschedule. No contact later = she was just being nice. Personally, I’d rather the girl not be nice instead of leading me on.
"if they want to talk to you, they'll find a way. and if they don't, it's just gonna be you constantly reaching out" I've been doing this my entire 28 year life. I'm constantly the one who reaches out first. It is so rare for a girl to actually want to talk to me. I've never been confessed to once in my life never had a girl initiate any kind of physical contact, never been touched, so I guess I really have gone unloved and unwanted as I thought. I've always been the one to initiate a hug, and I honestly don't even care about that anymore. If a woman feels pressured to hug me back and does so, at least I got what I wanted and can know what physical contact feels like, 'cause I certainly won't get it any other way.
@@KoolAidSquirt what really sucks is that when it does happen, it's so abnormal that we get normal, platonic affection, that a lot of guys get feelings for the girl who does it when she was just being nice. Then we get rejected and go back to being unwanted and untouched.
i have a european Goddess message me every day for the last 9 years. but guess what she's just being nice. she has a bf too but still messages me every day
In my experience, when a girl actually likes you, she won’t show it because she’s afraid of the potential possibility that you won’t like her. She’ll often give subtle hints but won’t be upfront about it at all.
It's the opposite for me. A girl will make it obvious she likes you by talking a lot with you or smiling at lot when she is talking with you and doesn't make things difficult if you want to get together with her.
It depends on her confidence level. staring into your soul and smiling then laughing at anything you say. Shy girls avoid eye contact but they show it other ways like fixing their hair and being awkward
@@rascal211 Only works for the 1%ers. Because they are a catch and thus something for said women to show off. If you're less "high value" in the general belief, she wont because it makes them look like bad too.
Thank you so much for making this. A lot of us men really get Confused By Some woman’s or most of their mixed signals. This is huge to note. This could’ve saved me a lot of time, money and pain a year ago that Oom E 7 months To get Over a girl that was just enjoying my company in bed, living with Me for a few Months and almost having my baby(!). I would’ve spent the rest of my life with this woman, if given the chance, and now looking back a year later and watching this video, I asked myself what was I thinking so glad to have a new perspective and dodging so many bullets of women seemingly interested. No thanks. This guy Doesn’t eat only “affection crumbs” like he used to… that’s so messed up how women are seriously encouraged to be narcissist in our society more so now than ever before, in the history of mankind. Me a lot
5:26 I am going to be honest, this is so incredibly insulting. Not from you Courtney, you're just delivering the message and I appreciate that because people need to hear this. I wouldn't feel heartbroken, I would feel disgusted by her for looking down on me. Maybe it's just me, but a girl scared to tell me the truth out of fear of hurting me is underestimating just how much life has thrown at me and turned me into someone strong. Sorry but you rejecting me won't crush me, thinking that it will is a poor judgement of who I am and thinking too highly of yourself. The best rejection I have been through is the girl telling me up front that she just does not want a relationship. The rest of them tried to avoid telling me, one even saying she didn't want to make me cry. I did cry but more than anything I was disgusted. Would you rather reject me upfront and make me cry, or avoid rejecting me until you feel like it's convenient, make me cry and then make me hate you?
Damn, that's a good point. You're right, I hate it when women do this. There's just something so disingenuous and nefarious about giving a guy hope, making him think you like him, only to let him down when the date is getting close. This is far, far worse than simply letting the man know that you're not interested as soon as he asks you out. There are exceptions, of course. I had a girl who used to like me in high school (I'm not 100% sure she did, but almost everything pointed to yes). She was beautiful and I couldn't believe she was into me, but silly me got together with another girl in the meantime. Once I'd broke up with that girl, I asked this other girl out and she said yes at first. We set a date, a location and everything. The day before the date, she cancelled, saying she had some personal issues to deal with. I got pissed, told her that she'd wasted my time, which obviously pissed her off. It was only after that I realized she actually did have an appointment with her psychologist that day and literally couldn't make it. That made me feel like a knob, and even to this day, I think about that from time to time. 😅
It's like my ex she cheated on me and didn't tell me for over a year until after we split up "I didn't want to hurt you I just wanted to forget about it." Like bitch lying to me is more hurtful than the truth! If she had told me at the time we might of worked things out because I am Poly so I don't mind its the lack of honesty ya know? Watching it go down hill for no reason was confusing. Tell The Truth!
A lot of them told me because I asked direct questions after 1 or 2 weeks. They won't even tell the truth until they have wasted atleast 5 to 7 days of your time 🤔
I like an instructor at my gym, she is beautiful. A good friend told me, if she has smiled you and talked to you; then, invite her out; I am like: "I like that you are trying to cheer me up to make a move, but she works here, she smile to everybody, it's customer service, and the time she talked to me was a work conversation about the PT I have with her coworker. Besides, I struggle to talk to her, even small talk". We usually misinterpreted friendly women.
@crandonborth1626 Yes, good advice, but let's take into consideration some things: 1-She now has a boyfriend, and she looks happy. That's the most important thing, no a dumbass shy idiot with a crush. Besides, by seeing her boyfriend, it's easy to see that I'm her type. 2- I think you didn't pay attention to the video. That's her workplace, and I go every day to burn myself down. It's not wise to follow your example and make her uncomfortable. It's fine. It is a child fantasy to believe that everybody desires happiness ✌🏼
The sad thing for me is I'm not messaging insta models, I'm not messaging stripers and I don't hang out with hoes. I message normal, good girls. I feel like like I'm pretty successful, engineer at a national lab. Make good money. I've done everything right so far but 🤷♂️ none of that matters haha If she doesn't like you. She doesn't like you. And that's okay.
Every idiot on earth will tell to lift weights but you could be as ripped as the Rock and she still not like you. And then they will tell you there are billions of women.
Definitely. I'm thinking about selling my phone and getting rid of all my social media (except for RUclips). Society is getting more superficial by the day and the most prudent thing would be to just stop cold turkey with all this surface level shite. My generation will all have such awful mid-life crises.
I did it months ago and I would recommend to do so the fact I have felt great for months now is amazing it’s a different type of good when you feel good for like 99% of the time instead of just good here and there because of a dopamine hit or something
Hope you gave it a try! Deactivated Facebook and Messenger for 6 months and felt great, back on Facebook now but primarily to upload artwork, same with Instagram. Using practically no chat services that don't involve work/business or planning meetings, and the silence is golden. Been some whiny people who think I'm upset with them or who complain about how they're supposed to get in touch (the latter usually the same people who only want to text and cancel meetups consistently). Found that people contact me when they actually want something as opposed to when they're bored these days.
@@salthcreative5540 I kid you not!! I replied to you and my answer go deleted. I did NOT use any profane or triggering words. I just wrote how I did try it out and it has changed my life for the better. (My time is limited to write it again.) The heck is going on with RUclips?
Thanks for advices Courtney. They are real gold. I just want to say that man needs to trust his own feeling. Feeling never lies. We are the ones who neglect it because we want to believe in something that is not.
I would say that it depends on cultural setting. Some cultures have (traditionally) so weird social rules that the girl cannot take the first step so signalling is really messed up. I'm pretty sure I missed a couple of girls when I was young because I was so socially ackward.
12min to explain this? This Indirect Game is shit, man! Direct Game is so much better : in the first 3 to 4 min as you talk to the girl, pull the trigger and tell her you like her for this or that reason and that you would like to take her on a date. - If she smiles and says "nope", she was being nice. You thank her for her honesty and you move on. You both saved an incredible amount of time - If she smiles and says "yep", she likes you. You just got yourself an instant-date with a girl you like and likes you. Boom. Done. 3 min to know it. Direct Game rules. Next Problem
Agreed, best approach is the 50/50 approach...ask her out if she really likes you she will accept, if not she will decline. Saves you lots of time and effort of trying to decode her behaviour
This doesn’t work either. A girl said yes to me and still ghosted me. And you can’t say that it was my personality because she knew me for about a year before I asked.
@@TheseEyesSeeDarknessClearly7 I'm sorry you got ghosted. I will say thought, you made here two "mistakes" that you can learn from and become better, thus lessening the chance of getting ghosted in the future. First, don't put aside my "technique" because it didn't work on one girl. There are 3.5 billions women on the planet. Try it on at least 100 women and see what happens. Second, you are critisizing my "technique" although you, yourself, admit that you did not do it! Careful about this. I said "in the first 3min to 4min". You said "She knew me for about a year" :D ! What happens here is, everybody, when we first meet someone, we inconsciously process "if that a potential lover or not?" And this process can take from 3 seconds (if who we have in front of us is incredibly repulsive to us, or incredibly attractive to us), to about 3 to 4 min, when we get to know a bit more about them. After that process, we put those people in a box in our head : danger-ennemy, unknown-uninteresting, friendly, potential-lover, potential-life-partner. Once we put someone in that box, it is INCREDIBLY hard to change that. This is why, the women who knew you for a year, she already had put you in one box, and 1 year later you made a request to change the box. Not happening. This event "I made her change her mind" is extremely rare, I would say less than a 1% chance, but it's everybody's fantasy, this is why you will find it in every Hollywood movie or novel book. It's there, not because it's realistic, but specifically because it's almost impossible, thus they are selling us a dream. The problem comes when people watch those movies and start to believe that the normal world is like this... Another way of saying it is : "99% of women you ever met in your life, if they did not put you in the "potential lover" box, is already lost to you forever and eternity". This is why shitty PUA will sell products like "how to get your ex back" because they care about your money, not your relationship life. And this is why every REAL PUA will always tell you : "it is SO MUCH EASIER to just go out there and find another woman". Much love to you! I hope you will find someone who likes what you have to offer
i really appreciate the question of "is she working?" Because I have been a tutor and teaching assistant to students my age, and a few of them have expressed interest in me simply because I was polite to them and showed interest in their lives (I guess). I normally ask everyone how they are doing, and try to show all of my students that I care about them. I am extra nice when I am on the job, and it is to everyone, not just men. It is hard to show negative emotions to them because I could risk my job, and I really don't want to.
8:47 When a girl likes you, the conversation is going to be more in-depth, a little bit more deep of a conversation, and you're gonna be able to tell the difference Spoiler: he could not. Things like this might seem extremely obvious to women, but they are completely invisible to most men. Even if we do think that maybe this might be a sign that potentially there's something more, you'Re going to have either the guys that go for it no matter how slight the positive signs (and they're going to be wrong more often than not) or you're going to have the guys who back off because it's extremely ambiguous and he doesn't want to be called creep or pushy if he pursues this and he's wrong. If it's not a LOUD, CLEAR, and OBVIOUS sign, men will not get it. Full stop. Ladies if you want to tell your guy that you like him, TELL HIM. Even if you flat-out say "Hey I kinda like you, want to grab a coffee later?" Guys will STILL think 'maybe she's just being nice, I can't assume anything'. With guys you literally cannot be too obvious. The overwhelming majority of us don't do subtle. Some of these tips are good, but some of the hints are about as obvious as telling guys to make sure she's not twiddling her thumbs counter-clockwise under the table while glancing to the east. Unless it's completely blatantly obvious, it does not work.
Gents, just default to she's just being nice to you. She doesnt like you. She would never choose you over anyone else. She probably doesnt want to be talking to you right now and is simply enduring every moment she has to be in your vacinity. Simply be nice back, end the interaction as soon as possible and walk away. Stay strong and accept she probably didnt want to talk to you in the first place 👍
The sad thing is that the only reason a video such as this one exists is because there are soooo many dudes out there who've never gotten to feel how it feels to have a girl like you :(
Trust bro, it is glaringly obvious when they do, i went through primary, highschool and half of uni until a girl liked me and wanted to talk to me. Work on yourself bro and live your life good will come. Nothing worth getting ever came easy :)
I've recently discovered you channel and I must say that it's very informative. It's very frustrating how complicated relationships are,and the gap between men and women can seem as wide as the Grand Canyon. But,thank you for trying to makes things a little more clear,Courtney. Stay safe and have a wonderful day. :)
The last thing you said in this video is important. I know this girl in the gym. She is self confident but shy. Gives all kind of signs like positioning her self closse to where ever i am working out as if to say "Talk to me". But she never starts a conversation. She has no problem talking to other people, but with me seem to not be able to relax giving short answers. Id be sure she didnt like me if it wasnt for her "following me" seeking contact and during a conversation i had with another person and her, she straight up tells me "I will be here every tuesday this semester at this time"...
Every time I took a chance asking out a flirty, affectionate woman, I got shot down. I embarrassed myself so many times now I just assume these women are flirty and affectionate as a personality type. It bothered me for a while, but now I can ignore it.
I heard this when I was playing a video game from a character… “ son, it’s important to have very low expectations. That way you will not be disappointed.”
Or you could just keep taking the change and ask in the future, too. If you have a match, it's great. Otherwise you lost a couple of seconds to ask and do not need to think about anymore because you know the real status. Being embarassed just means that you weren't asking the question honestly - that is, truly interested to ask a question and know the true answer. If you ask any other question with yes/no answer, would you be embarassed by default for one answer?
This is a point-by-point exact description of all my work girlfriends, (and I am married, happily, for many years.) Not once have I ever flirted with them, or they with me, in an overt sense, but you know exactly what is happening when they find a reason to talk to you or touch you, or ask you a question and look right at you. So take your shot, if she's giving you these signs.
There was this girl whom worked in grocery shop as a cashier. She was always talking to me and stuff, then the other day I was in line and I saw she is talking to everybody, she was just being talkative. That was a sign for me she is not treating me special.
Personally, I'd much rather a girl just straight up tell me that she's not interested in me than for her to pretend that she does and intentionally lead me on
Facts I been there, don’t like the feeling rather have shit be straight the same way I am with them ya know?
Girls are to emo and care about your feelings to do that. But chances are if you are feeling like she is not interested is because she is in fact not interested. You are just blinded by emotion but your instincts are on point.
@@dnegel9546 But you could never be 100% sure unless she straightforwardly tells you. Like in my case: When I tried to get close, she always managed to slip away, but when I was backing down for a few day, she tried to get close and flirt.
It has happened several times, and I'm quite sure it's not my blind emotion. I'm interested in her but it's far from love and I would have no problem if she doesnt like me. But she just keeps getting in and out, keeping me guessing, neither refusing nor accepting, which drives me nut.
They like the attention
@@aclock2 if she does this one more time or so, just be straight up honest and confront her with your intentions. if she avoids the issue or doesn't know how to reply, then she's just into the attention and not into you. i'd just drop it and move on.
She liked my meme, so I think things are getting pretty serious
I think it's time to go buy a wedding ring.
bruh she saw my stories. Where should I take her for the honeymoon? :P
Lol
Kip! long time no see!
😂😂😂
Always assume someone is being nice/polite and never be bothered with those unable to express what they think and feel.
Fair enough
You aint gettin nothin thats way@@StillYearZero
My rule: I ONLY initiate text conversations twice, then stop. If she doesn’t initiate after, that’s it. I stop talking to that one. That goes for personal interest or female friends, reciprocity is the measure.
100% in agreeance with you my guy. I'm exactly the same way. Two txt initiations and if she doesn't initiate on the third chat? Game over. Disappointed? Yes but i'm not gonna lose any sleep over it. Her loss not mines.
This is best )
I am not texting anybody 🤣
Smart man
@@blinkzone1 What if she always replies to your text?
"She doesn't want to hurt your feelings, but long term doesn''t mind destroying you."
True so true
Amen.
Genius. Well said!
That's your problem though, chasing after somebody for months when there's no real interest
@@tramarthomas6105 Who are you talking to?
Even if she really does like you, it doesn’t mean she likes you
what
Correct
Aka she likes the attention you give her and not you entirely
so fucking true .
I generally go with the "she’s just being a nice person" to a female who’s friendly. I’m almost never wrong.
✔️
Me too.
You need to learn to read their body language. When women are attracted to you most of the time they will display subtle signs. Theirs video's on this subject.
@Blue collar Hero lol really?
@@antoinecharlesdegaulle580 yeah I actually agree, I’ve noticed when someone gives the signs, but usually girls if they try they’ll only do it for like 5 minutes and if we don’t react exactly when they want, they move on.
No matter if you are a man or a woman be direct with your feelings!! Dont give people false expectations, because it hurts them more in a long term.
Sad thing is I used to think I never attracted girls, and I did, but it was usually shy girls who didn't make the move, and I was suppose to try and assume their feelings through subtle approaches. As soon as I said something that sounds like rejection, rip! Happened a couple of times when I was a lot younger.
Not the best advice ever. Never be direct about your feelings until she initiated. Girls likes to flirt and so should you, they’d rather be indirect. If you directly tell them you like them that creates a huge tension and she might not have had enough feelings yet so hang out a free times, let her have feelings for you, let her initiate that conversation, until then enjoy the intimate moments. Being too direct kills all the fun.
@@Akrazzyy women need to be direct and men too
I disagree. I've had the roles were reversed, I would feel assuming the girl is pursuing me to be narcissistic, same vibe as "I have a boyfriend". So a woman may not know you're into them or at least suspects you are, but if she just bluntly says she's not into you, but you weren't pursing then it's very narcissistic. Just learn when things are actually reciprocal as the video says.
Ya but they crave the attention. That way they can go to their friends and say, "Oh my god, this guy won't leave me alone! 😊"
There's a book called Casanova Optimization of Attraction, and it talks from body language and conversaton starters to dark mind tricks and flirting through texts. it's the real deal.
Selling your book, are you? 😂
I saw this exact same comment word by word in another video, shut up man 😂
Bot
There is a community of women who are probably outraged that Courtney is giving valuable trade secrets. She’s on our team 🙌🏽🔥💪🏽
No, she's making money off you watching her ramble on without really having to deal with you.
@@2birddogsandawolfdog945 right xd, but still she is helping you isn't she
most of this shit is obvious tho...
@@cope_r3270 Me?? No. I'm just reading through all the simps in the comments!! 🤣It's basically a money making machine. Same as guys throwing money at baristas wearing bikinis or strippers. Put a decent looking chick on a video that puts on a sympathy talk and all these guys get their feelers all tingly. If she'd open a live chat, OMG these idiots would throw their life savings at her hoping for a phone number.
@@2birddogsandawolfdog945 she really should consider live streaming. The super chats would flow in… 😄
Courtney is talking to us a lot and giving us her direct attention. Is she just being friendly or does she like us? 😂 😂 😂
Man idk! What should I say??!
She's not looking at us, she's looking at me
@@Richard-wp6ep No, she's was looking me. I saw her first.
she's letting us down gently.
@@kevinmalone3210 I'm too high for this shit 🤣 🤣
Just always tell myself they’re just being nice, puts my mind at ease.
Real
I always like to tell my buddies that if you are in touch with yourself, and your objective is to live a good, fulfilling life (as opposed to solely chasing women, getting laid etc) - you will never put yourself in a situation where you need to worry about whether or not she likes you like that.
You will create platonic joy and depth with the people you interact with, women or otherwise. And that will always feel amazing and fill your heart. Winning female affection will become much less of an obsession.
And when a woman does have romantic feelings for you, the indications will be obvious. Women will make an effort to pursue a good man in their network. You just need to work on yourself!
These are great insights!
What is it they say about a man in his 50s: he finally becomes the man he always wished he would be. :)
Honestly just be yourself, your fun/funny confident version of yourself and be ambitious, and a women will eventually like you
@@Blinkers2007GameDev not if you are not attractive, that gets your foot in the door.
I agree that you should have a purpose in life and know what you are doing. This attracts girls. But I would not hope too much that they will reach out to you first. It depends on the culture, but still girls do that very rarely. At best, she can give you some signs, but this can be very misleading, as explained in this video. So with girls you should behave the same way is in life: know what you want and go ahead irrespectively of whether you think that she likes you
I learned a long time ago, she's just being nice. Always.
How tall are you?
@@Mogamishu I'm 6'1" of ugly bastard
@@zachw2538 me too just a couple inches shorter
I’m 6’4, 6 figures of “such a good friend”. 😈
Same bro I just assume most girls are Bing nice I made the mistake of assuming a girl who is just being nice to liking me and it always ended with it being awkward
I went through all of this, and I finally, after about 4 months, got her actually into me. In the end, it didnt workout but it was an insane learning experience. This video has helped me understand even more where i went wrong and why she would do the things she did.
If anyone is wondering how I went from her just being nice and us being friends to her actually wanting me, what changed was an increase in confidence, being a lot less needy, not being afraid to speak my mind and i massively improved my flirting just through techniques i found on YT.
I also threw in some simple and funny dirty talk ("you can get undressed in front of me i dont mind" kind of stuff), better eye contact, broke the touch barrier e.t.c. The main issue guys have is a lack of belief in themselves. If you think you can get her into you and when the time is right you flirt well and give off the right signs, play it cool, its actually pretty straightforward tbh.
When you said "or she's a narcissist." You made me so happy, I just needed the validation.
Same
yeah, we probably ain't missing much by ignoring those signs
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
wtf?????? just because she's quiet?
You think other people are worser than you & have bad intentions...you are the narcissist actually
I smashed the Like button, but don't get it twisted. I'm just being nice.
🤣😂🤣 toxic
Good point.
😂😂😂😂😂
You took it to far. Just give her the view. Not the like.
🅿️ushin 🅿️
I was at a restaurant the other day and this girl and I were having a conversation, she was giving me all of her attention, eye contact and she was asking me all sorts of questions about myself like how I like my steak cooked. She was even taking notes!! I think she must like me
🤣🤣🤣
#1 She never initiates conversations but she keep replying
#2 Bails last minute
#3 Touching
#4 No deep conversations/questions
#5 Attention
#6 Behavior with other guys
Just being nice to you
@@DigvijaySingh-ct7lu she likes the attention
@@rick-ry3kj probably
I learnt that the hard way last night, I broke down fr n spent all night picking myself back up, I haven't slept for 26 hours cos I'm scared of sleeping now
@@ktbecstasy damn bro I hope you got some sleep, I wouldn't tell you to change your whole life at once, you gotta put out 1 fire at a time, focus on getting some sleep, once you got that down improve your diet, then go to the gym, in a matter of a month or two, you'll get the rubber to meet the pavement
Hey, I got it!!! To be on the safe side, just regard any and every woman you meet as "only trying to be nice." You'll never expect anything from them nor be disappointed, this way. Thanks, Courtney!
Facts💯
I assume every woman is a lesbian even if they do all the signs because even if a woman sleeps with you, she can just be doing it because she's being nice.
And then you'll never have a romantic partner ever!
blessed is he who expects nothing - for he is never disappointed
This the way life ought to be lived. Assume the least of everyone.
The fact that nobody talks about forbidden books on Revandles is so insanee
I just got a book from this site, and I’m loving it. Thanks for pointing me in the right direction I’m finally feeling like I can address my fear of women.
@@OscarNew.1 Can you tell me where to find that books ?
Not sure about other guys, but when I was younger a girl literally had to throw herself on me for me to pick up on whether she liked me. It's years later that I figured out a lot of girls were flirting and I couldn't get their obvious signals. Now only married moms hit on me.
@ DM - They ALWAYS claim that they give "obvious' signals, so you NEVER really find out what was happening.
Not your fault. They just get away with being awkward.
Agreed!
I'm exactly the same, I don't have a clue
@@AppleBottomJ 🙄then grow a little bit of courage for 10 seconds and tell him your true feelings. Literally just one small moment of courage is all it takes. We men have to do it all the time.
Random Dude: Courtney, I think this chick likes me. She keeps rubbing my back.
Courtney: She's a massage therapist, it's her job.
Me: LOL!!!!
😂😂😂😂 I’m laughing!
Same happend to me! My massage therapist started whispering in my ear if i was enjoying it. I answerd positively.
Then she started kissing my neck, And biting my ears. A bit strange but probably part of the procedure
At the end of the session, she winked at me, asked if i was free tonight, And if i wanted a happy ending at her place. I had to do tax returns, so i said no and explained that to her. She got mad afterwards.
Tbh i just think she was being nice, and didn’t think much about it.
@@CourtneyRyan I have a good one for you... Long time ago I met this girl at work. She was a packet she pack orders she would ask me everyday to help her and to get her orders for her. Then she got a job up front in the office. I would be in the door way and she would be in the parking lot and I would hear her call out to me Mark cook so I would run to her and I would say yes Ashley she said walk with me she did that 4 times what did she meant by that ? And asking me to help her everyday? I was in love with her but I made mistakes and she acts like she hates me now.
@@CourtneyRyan you're probably just being nice
@@gentlebabarian damn I didn't know massage therapies end with winks, ear kisses and house invitations. Must be a VIP service!
I really like this RUclips channel because she always tells it how it is and doesn't sugarcoat anything. I can tell she's trying to be as honest as she can.
-and as nice 🙄
Courtney likes me. I can tell by how she looks at me through the video🥰
Lmao me too
Same
Dude you just cracked me up
you and the other millions of viewers.. 😂
Lmaoo she is just being nice.. thats her job
I knew a guy in school who (I think) was somewhere on the spectrum. he had a lot of trouble forming social connections, and most people (especially girls) would just dismiss him. so every now and again, when he'd meet a girl who simply wasn't rude to him... was just being polite... he would end up thinking that they liked him. I always felt bad for him for that. I saw him get hurt several times because of it.
jeff -- I was that dude.
😮
Yeah being on the spectrum makes attracting girls a billion times harder
I been going toy local convenient market gas station and had conversations with a attractive woman. Haven't seen her the past year to recently couple weeks ago, and she gave me a big smile. Seen her the next week walking in and immediately i noticed her eyes light up with big smile peeking under the food rack checking me out. That made my day😁. Week later she walk out the store while getting out of my car and she walk up to me smiling and said hello, and i responded the same then she went to her car. Im a gentleman and seeing where this might go. Im a introvert but more comfortable with people i know.
Seven months later, has anything happened? Also for the record, I think waiting is not necessarily the gentlemanly thing to do. It's not like you're going up to every pretty woman you see, this one is different.
Wait too long and the opportunity of a lifetime might slip away....Act now and go for it.
You're the person who tells people what they need to hear vs. what they want to hear. Quality tips
1 Is she obligated?
2 Actively messaging first ?
"" Cancels last minute?
Touches you/comes closer?
Asks personal questions?
Gives attention?
How she flirt with other guys? Or treat you different?
Nothing happens except 2 seconds of eye contact and "does she likes me ?"
Straight up, this goes for both sexes. You can’t force relationships. Whether it be romantic relationships or friendships. You can put forth the effort but if the other party doesn’t reciprocate, that’s on them. Those that want to be in your life will be and so forth. Relationships are a two way street and it takes two to maintain! Wish everyone the best
#2 is spot on. I cut off a girl last year and blocked her for good after we never met in person and she always bailed with one excuse after another. After the 3rd time, I disappeared
like clockwork!! definitely a big one to pay attention to 👏🏼
@@CourtneyRyan I like to use the baseball method, strike 1, strike 2, strike 3, you're out 👎🏻
That is definitely a good decision you made.
I have 1 BIG tip for all of us guys, I don't say it's 100% right, but a lot of the times it is...
If a guy asks a girl out on a date, she finds an excuse or really can't fit into his plan, if she wants to hang out with him and be with him, she will definitely suggest next time when she is free to go out even if it's in a week or two from the time he asked her...
I don't even suggest giving her a second or third chance...
I think we all are special and awesome and we should treat ourselves like that...
I hope I helped someone :)
@@jovan_jovanović_hic In my case, I initiated the first 2 times and got bailed on so I took a step back and let her initiate it. Before the 3rd and final came, she initiated while I took a step back and still cancelled. To me, she was just seeking attention and validation which is why #2 is good advice. Keep doing your thing and help others, we all can learn from each other 🙏🏻🙂
@@johngonzalez4298 The baseball method killed me 😂 I couldn’t have put it better myself!
“I can’t say I’ve ever really ghosted somebody”
Fellas like this comment if you didn’t believe that bullshit for one second
lmao no way in hell when she was in her teens and early 20's she ghosted all the time 100%
If you're a woman you've ghosted a few rugby teams worth of men in your life.
Alexis Valdovinos are you that desperate for validation?
as a girl myself, I can tell you that as soon as a girl is conventionally attractive, she has probably ghosted someone at least once.
Absolutely. Technology as a whole is great, but it's given people the ability to filter out anything they don't feel like dealing with. Young people, and even some older people, are so terrified of any kind of confrontation and it's so easy to enable that with just a click of the "unfriend" and "block" buttons. It's absolutely embarrassing. All that over something that's most likely a misunderstanding that could've been solved with a fucking sentence or two.
I liked this advice. I think the top point is whether or not she asks you questions. I have absolutely no trouble talking to strangers and beautiful women much, much younger than me. I actually enjoy listening to people's stories and problems. But, very, very few women ever ask me anything about my life, or even repeat my name. So, it's fun to get the conversation, but you are right. If they are interested, they'll ask questions.
Also, what you said about service/retail workers is spot on as well. I love chit-chatting with cashiers. They seem to light up when I come to the store and are very friendly and jovial. In a couple of cases, after a couple of years of this chit-chat, two different young women let me know that they were now single. I asked one to have coffee in broad daylight, a hundred yards from the store. One gave me an immediate no. The other gave me an immediate yes, but then ghosted me. I learned the hard way not to misinterpret women who are friendly at work--in my case, I think they were bored and a brightened up their day. I actually am happy to do this, but now I would never ever ask any to coffee again. I'm just happy to be friendly.
The texting example was great advice too. Some women have offered me their numbers and always respond to my texts, but never initiate. I agree with you. If they are interested they will ask questions and they will initiate contact.
Most women, I realize get hit on many times each day, in person, and online. Most are also in relationships and when they break up, they are only available for a brief window of opportunity. So timing is important. With all girls that I dated, I later found out that by blind luck, I approached them shortly after they'd broken up. That's why I was encouraged by the two cashiers who told me they were now single. But again, I knew them when they were at work, and even this information was not a "hint." They were at work. I also found out from a few that due to my friendliness they saw me as "gay" so they were friendly back. When I asked them to coffee, they saw that I wasn't and I got turned down. Now, at my stage of life, a mere conversation with a young woman is great and some have told me that it makes their day when they see me. That is wonderful enough.
In a relationship for years. But does she like you?
The answer is...its' hard to tell.
haha....but also yeah, truth. feels.
Being in a long term relationship doesn’t stop you from feeling attracted to other people. Crushes other than your significant other let you know how much the relationship means to you.
U dont understand how real this is. Its funny but its not a joke
Casuallyexplained level of uncertainty
@@NeptuneJr hahahah yess bro
I'm 21 now and I wish I knew all of this when I was 17. And even tho I don't consider myself old, I recommend to all teens who subscribed to Courtney's channel to listen carefully. You will save yourself valuable time and energy by letting go of someone who is not truly interested in you.
Same here. o /
You sound like me
Amen
Totally, specially for teenage girls it's really hard to be assertive in this subject.
I'm still learning and I'm almost 49. Eventually I developed the ability to not give a fuck about the outcome of flirting which is the secret. Now it's fun and not as stressful
*The signs you mentioned, like prolonged eye contact and playful teasing, are definitely key indicators. It’s all about paying attention to her body language and the context of your interactions. Great insights that can help a lot of guys out there!*
Having been married for 22 years and recently divorced, it's interesting to listen to you, although I'm still a very long way off from wanting to start thinking about dating again. Lots of good suggestions. I remember walking through a busy grocer back when I was first married. When we left the store my wife told me that 5 women had hit on me and I was completely oblivious to it.
Sorry about that Rick. It sucks, divorce does. My ex-wife constantly told me about women hitting on me, and I wasn't even aware. I wasn't paying attention; which should have gotten to her thick brain, that I really was devoted to her. As for divorce...they say it gets better, but after 2 years, I don't know. Some things get better. That shellshocked feeling you get right after it is final goes away. You are angry, you are sad, and then angry, on and on. Holidays suck and so do birthdays, but I have also seen it as a good opportunity to just be myself with myself by myself. Does that make sense? I am not dating yet either, but I keep my options open. Most days it is okay to be single. You only have yourself to answer to. We never had any kids, so there is not that concern in my life. I have grown up a lot....basically I am saying that there can be positives from a negative ugly situation.
She was lying to you brah, that absolutely never happened. Dudes are clueless, you would absolutely know if a woman was hitting on you 😂
I'm married and happens alot now.
She was probably making it up. The trick is to know, did your wife cut you off before or after that incident? Some women are looking for an excuse to take an out, others are willing to make one up.
How is this possible they were hitting on you and you didn't know it? Every Courtney's video says you will see it when they do.
Best way to tell if she likes you is to ask her out on a date. Anything other than yes means she isn't interested. The body language, eye contact, etc that Courtney mentioned is also important.
Very true, it saves your time and energy 😏
What if she is a widow? Her husband died 5 years ago.
Nope. Do not ask any woman on a date without knowing her a bit. Mostly if you approach her online. Many women are scared for safety reasons and would like to know some things before meeting up. So many men rush these things I lose interest when a men after few messages asks me out. I end up finding a fault or ghost him, or he ghosts me after I find something to put him off. I want a man to take the time to decide whether he wants to meet. I would meet him after 1-2 weeks conversations.
Five or six weeks of intermittent intense texting may have been waiting too long to ask her out in person.
@@ana-maria448 to take his time, after 1-2 weeks ? :D
I'm not sure how I came across your videos, but I'm glad I did. You're insightful, direct and succinct. Thank you!
Don’t even have to watch this....she’s just being nice. The end. 😆
Me: So, does a girl likes me?
Courtney: The quick answer is NO!!
Me: Darn.
Dude - don't give up. Work on yourself, and use women as motivation. The particular woman that you are using for motivation may not be the woman you end up with, but you can decide to improve yourself. No PMO is a great place to start, as well as exercising. Set some fitness goals, work hard, again do the no PMO thing. At some point you'll be content on your own, and the right woman will just come along. Again I will stress this point - no PMO works wonders as it increases testosterone.
It’s just 7 days and the outbreaks are well treated and unseen. Thank you so much Dr. Aloha #Autism #Cancer #Herpes for curing my HSV 1&2 completely. 🌱🍵ruclips.net/channel/UC_YFEEZEr1BxGkNg1d4vqww
@@aodh5966 women should not be a motivation for improvement, that would be chasing validation from them
@@rick-ry3kj not validation, I know I'm relatively good looking, but I also know that many women prefer other guys and wouldn't like me at all. Validation is weak, self confidence is key
@@aodh5966 yea
I used to have crush on my old class monitor. She was an extrovert who is friendly, polite, cute yet sometimes cold-out suddenly due to her job. One time i was luckily put right next to her, and i thought that that time was one of the best time in my life. The way she treated me, chatted me, frequently asked me questions and smiled at me completely made me thought that she was into me too. No, i was wrong all the time. Two months later, she was moved to sit next to another guy. From that time, the interactions between us almost went to zero, and we barely contact to each other anymore. After watching your video, I realized that she was just clearly being nice to me, and my thoughts was blinded by the emotions. It was a hard truth to believe in but finally the question about Was she into me is cleared. I decided to gave up chasing her and moved on
I also learned: The most attractive factors men have are the confident and the will
As a man, I have the opposite problem. I always assume they don't like me, so when some of them actually do, I completely miss the opportunity. This happen to any of you, lads?
And thanks for the insight as always, Court. Such a great coach to have.
I have a lot of female friends so its a tough call, but I just play it safe and chalk it up to them just being nice. Usually keeps things from being awkward.
@SpiritSword Honestly man, I don't know why so many advice channels (not Courtney) always grill us for not reading female body language or social cues right as if it's a total cake walk, when it's clearly not. lol
I dont even understand my own body language, since i act mostly blank, so how i am supposed other people's?
All the time from what I've heard. Their flirting goes right over my clueless head
@@MyNameisRevenant Allow me. Closed/crossed arms = Not interested in whatever. Look at the feet, where are they pointing? If they're more directed towards you, god sign! Same with her overall body. If it's more pointed towards you, and engaging, good sign. Another good sign, they fuck with their hair a lot, or expose their neck in a flirty way. Good sign.
Especially loved the tip about asking questions. Sometimes it's hard to pay attention to whether or not the other person is really engaging in the conversation until reflecting on it afterwards. Great insights, thanks for sharing!
I always recognize whether she's asking me questions or not. If someone's interested in you, they'll ask about you. Plus if I feel like I'm just interviewing her, I get bored real quick, and then I actually lose interest.
I respect that you actually respect your followers! Alot of these female hosted channels seem to make men think it's okay to simp over a woman instead of being the man you should be.
I don't need too much help in this situation.. however, it's always nice to know some tricks to keep a conversation light and fun.. I watch this more for regular interaction with women. Men and women are very different creatures.
Here's an example,.. I can naturally talk about Cars, Fitness and Boxing all day but as soon as you start talking to women about it they'll lose interest if you drag it on. But men could sit there all day and talk.
So it's just nice to know what women appreciate in conversations.. no one wants to be redundant or boring no matter who they're talking with.
"Does she like me or is she just being nice?"
Twelve minutes later: "She doesn't like you. She is just being nice."
I had the opposite. "She is just being nice" by the end I am like "Shit maybe she does like me" at the end of the day the best way to find out is to ask them out. if they say no they say no. Tell them to have a nice day and walk away. Its hard though!
@@TheBanana93 That is definitely an option when you just meet someone by accident. Not that easy to just walk away when you actually know the person, and meet them on a regular basis.
@@jirkazalabak1514 i met a girl in my college...and i am always in a doubt, some day i think
she likes me. The other day is shy... or the third day - just being nice
Yeah i only initiate conversations and i don't really know what to do now
Should i ignore her... don't talk much or huuuhhh!!!
My city is too small if you ask someone out you will see them again.
In which you she may like you? I am a woman so I can like a man for his physics, but that's not enough to want to date. I may like his wisdom, but if comes as cold ans arrogant, I lose interest. So you see, needs to be a balance. As with men. In the dating process, any moment you can be damped or rejected there are risks in everything. Just be mature and have not too many expectations. Or at least keep expectations low and do not fantasizes something that is not there still.
You might be the most honest woman who I don't know, who I actually feel like I do know . I love your honesty.
as a woman i never touch a man in any way without any intention. btw my daughter told me she backhugged her crush last week. so hugging is included as touching in her case.
Gosh! Courtney, you're a living legend...everything you talk about is so relatable and straight to the point. I appreciate that.
You’re spot on in this video. I ran into the girls who canceled at the last minute and girls who didn’t ask me questions. Before seeing this video, I did recognize the sign. I didn’t pursue and stopped communicating with them entirely. This video re-enforces my thinking. Thanks.
Saw a girl by herself at an outdoor bar, thought I'd ask her to come join me and my friends. I started with a joke, she responded in kind. We get to talking and I forget about my friends. She calls her babysitter to extend the time she can be out. We swing danced even though there was no music, we had to use our phones. She showed me hilarious videos of her son. I was really into her. I never have a girl agree to dance if we have to make the music ourselves, but she was into it. A few hours later, she has to get back home, I get her number. One of the best first dates I ever had. I texted a few times and tried a call over the course of a week. Never heard from her again.
This is easy for me! She is ALWAYS just being nice. Literally always.
Courtney is the best friend we don’t deserve but definitely need.
Speak for yourself
Wtf
Don't deserve?
Damn can you be more of a kiss ass than what u just said?!?! Thats a simp move...smh
@@yongdeng1813 💯
All us guys out there I pray you find the right women. I know it’s really hard to let go but if you fall in any category of what she’s say stop making contact. I am in the similar situation and I am heart broken but I feel a lot better after I stoped trying to get with her. God bless everyone! Just have trust in god
Me: I talk to the girl in the store*
Also me: I think she likes me
Courtney: Im about to end this mans whole career
I am you from the future
@@sirlanceinhole9299 what the hell is happening here!
sadly my dad doesn't understands this. whenever my dad sees a girl talking to me he'll try to encourage me to talk to her and get me to believe she's into me and I tell him just because someone talks to you DOESN'T mean they like you
I'm sure he understands seeing how he managed to reproduce via making you
Maybe because your father has a better understanding of female nature, or he thinks women are the same as the ones he met back then, i cannot tell for sure.
@@MyNameisRevenant well it’s different nowadays based on how women are taught by female rappers and other bad influences from other women. Also I’ve had girls flirt, talk and even touch me and still didn’t mean that she likes me. So I have a really tough time telling if a girl likes me so I just leave it alone at this point
Right! He asked why i dont give my co-worker a ride home? Huh? She doesn't know me like that.
Listen to your dad, go chat them up, make them laugh and actually listen when they talk to you. It WILL turn her on and she'll be even more interested.
Girl: “I wanna baby with you… 🥵”
Courtney: “Top signs that she is already pregnant with some douchebag and pin the pregnancy on you”
and she'll make sure you pay for the child support.....
Damn girl at least take me out to dinner first
Ain’t even joking!
DNA!
😂 I know three guys this happened to. 😢
Damn. I haven't had a conversation started by a woman to me outside of work in , gosh how many years.
When Courtney puts it like this I realise how repellant and cringe I am .
Damn that hits a spot
I've literally never had a woman initiate a conversation with me so you're doing better than I am! (and I just turned 34 lol)
U just realised
Bruh 😨
@@erikbeckstrand3748 they have me,only when they want something.
Keep in mind in the U.S. it's the man's job to get the ball rolling with the girl. Sounds doable on the surface, but the problem is that if a woman does like you, just who is the 'you' she likes? While men are pretty flexible in getting to know a women, with women they will have a whole 'play' that they need you to perform in, and you will be graded on how well you play your part. You'll only have a chance if you make it past the audition and opening night. The weird thing is if you win them over with this charade if you turn out to be a complete asshole they may actually stay with you. It's so strange...
The most dangerous and abusive encounters I've had with women were those who were expert at pretending to genuinely like me. Either as a friend or potentially more. I've become increasingly more aloof and skeptical over the years and at this point waste ZERO time on any person of either gender who would be hostile to my morals or who I am. Let them repel from me on their own, takes care of the problem before it ever gets started.
Based.
Bro, you’re delusional. They never liked you. If they liked you then you would know and would bang them. Or they like you and when they get to know you they think you’re lame
Whenever a woman has interacted with me in a warm, friendly way, I just always assumed she was raised to be nice and was living up to it.
I have never flirted, nor have I ever thought a woman was flirting with me. Many's the time, after a friendly interaction with a woman, other women who witnessed the interaction would give me an incredulous look and ask, "Why didn't you ask her out? She was hitting all over you!"
Ask my wife of 26 years, who finally snatched my keys as I was leaving work one day and wouldn't give them back until I made a date with her.
I don't catch hints from women, no matter how obvious they think the hints are.
You have to be VERY direct, or I assume you're just being nice.
So this is the third video that I've watched and wow guys she's actually being really honest and giving a lot of golden nuggets. Not just how to approach women that you're interested in but also how to talk to people in general. Another great video Courtney.
Thank you so much 😊
@@CourtneyRyan what if she’s shy shy girls usually don’t go up to guys and initiate a convo even if the girl does like the guy but I’ve heard shyness can come off as disinterest from what I’ve known
@@CourtneyRyan
Thanks Courtney: Time for me to move on then😢 I am Mister Nice guy… she even says it to me, “you’re a nice guy.” I should have seen it coming. So, if I was mean to her, would that help? Not that I could be mean really. Thanks for your video. ❤
Shes reading my mind😭😭😭😭again its just the video i needed😭
Thank you!!!
Yay!! ❤️
Like the third time she's made a video right after I was asking myself something about dating lol
When I was first dating i regretted not having a sister but now as I am older and divorced my daughters are even better to give advice and now RUclips helps big time.
This is always a tough one for us guys when actively courting a girl …. I find if you’re reaching out more often than her (even though we’re supposed to lead) it’s safer to assume she’s not as interested as you are. Don’t get led on.
Ladies need to step up at times if they really are interested. Stop the games/playing hard to get etc. Text the guy out of the blue from time to time, heck even ask on a date. The easiest ways to give signals you’re not interested is not putting in equal effort.
Okay give me advice..
I like a guy. I only see him in the summer.. last summer I dropped many hints to get him to ask me out. Once I even invited him to hang out by saying “we should do this..” and he responded “yea for sure.” It never did happen. Though, he continued to say “hey” and asked me how I was. Plus his smile! Even if I was turned the other way. I don’t want to seem desperate and clingy but I tried hanging out. He didn’t make that effort. I could say he’s shy, etc, etc. but I don’t want to lie to myself. Maybe he’s acting weird b/c I’m 17 and he’s 19? Some guys just want sex.
@@AppleBottomJ When you tell someone "we should do this", follow it up by talking about when you're going to do it. Like "are you free on Wednesday?"
If you don't it's not going to happen, it doesn't matter whether it's your crush or a friend. I do it all the time: a girl will sometimes ask me to do something together and I'll be like "alright", but I'll just forget about it or I won't follow it up because I don't like texting people first, even if I like them.
If they accept, they're interested. Pretty easy to figure it out
@@DXYS95nah, that was hell of an opening. That’s not some indirect suggestion. That was a come and get me one. No adult men that is interested would miss that, I want to believe it is impossible, precisely because he will be focused on getting those signals to pursue. The guy wasn’t interested.
For real. This. Women quick being lazy asses and making it all about you. Actually initiate conversation sometimes. Or put yourself around the guy. Good grief. Expect us to do everything and read your mind and play your games. It’s exhausting. Where are all the good women?
@AppleBottomJ I would guess he either wasn't interested, or just thought you were being nice. Men aren't as indirect and clued into tone and body language and stuff as women are. If he's only 19, he still might be young enough to be inexperienced or focused on other things.
Try flirting/giving him your number if you haven't already.
Courtney your voice is super smooth and captivating. I find it hard to take myself away when you start your simple and practical advice.
Courtney, your videos should be shown in every 6th grade classroom, as a public service. Wish you had been around when I was an adolescent.
Good point about a girl just being nervous or tongue-tied. Once, in my circle of friends, there was someone who I assumed disliked me very much--until one day her close friend said she was crazy about me (but froze up and resisted eye contact because she just got nervous around me).
as someone with Aspergers, your videos are so helpful, Courtney! i really appreciate the help in the dating scene. I never know if a grl likes me of if she's being nice, cause i can't read body language very well.
Thanks again
Graeme
This makes me so happy to read. I’m so glad my content is helping. thank you for the comment ❤️😊
I'm a bit on the Asperger's /OCD spectrum too. It takes me a while to understand social queues with a new person. Honestly, the best advice I can give you is that if you like a girl, be ready with a short, light introduction of yourself and then just ask for her phone number. If she likes you, she'll give it to you. Don't overthink it.
You can even include the fact that you find reading social queues difficult as part of your intro and finish with words to the effect of " I may be reading things wrong, but if I'm not, can I get your phone number?" A bit of honesty and vulnerability can go a long way. I'm not saying it will work, you've always got to be ready for a polite rejection, but believe me, perceived weaknesses can be strengths if you breeze through them with a bit of confidence.
This is really interesting to listen to as a woman! People (men) can often perceive me as flirty, but most of the time, I'm just being friendly and welcoming because that's my personality. Though I have decreased my "friendliness" (including touching and eye contact and asking questions) so as to not be misunderstood as flirty/liking them. I think asking questions (even deep ones), smiling, initiating conversations and hangouts just shows that they are interested in you as a person in general, including as a friend.
I think more of a sign that I like someone is wanting to spend more time with them and talk to them more than other people (like 3+ hours). It's about the length of time that I'm spending with my attention on them that shows I'm interested. It's lingering and not wanting the conversation to end. I also notice that I want to (and feel comfortable) being close to them and want to move closer to them.
Lastly, it's a vibe... it's about how you look at another person, not that you look at them. Does she look at you with warmth, excitement, tenderness? For prolonged periods of time? It's about the tone of voice too, like is it soft, tender, relaxed? Or flat, uncomfortable, stressed? These are the more sublte things to pay attention to.
But overall, yes when in doubt, ask and intitiate a date and you will have your answer. If she cancels last minute the first time, it may be for a good reason, but let her be the one to bring up rescheduling.
Why do women and dating in general have to be so complicated 🤣
Mgtow is the only way
Its not, your just over complicating it.
It's actually quite simple. The girl determines whether or not she will let you fuck her within the first 3 seconds of scanning you from head to toe. It's either a ✅ or a 🚫. Anything you do or say after that decision has been made is completely irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
Hormones
@@nonexistenceisbliss9528 and you probably think the friend zone is real 😂🤣😂 that 3sec decision is made every time they see you🤔 you choose to enforce the yes or no
Courtney, we men are lucky to have such a wise and attractive wing girl such as yourself helping us out. You're amazing.
Lots of love from the UK.❤
If a girl cancels a first date at the last minute REGARDLESS of the reason or excuse, move on. If she’s still interested, she will contact you later (just like car salespeople do), or she will reschedule. No contact later = she was just being nice. Personally, I’d rather the girl not be nice instead of leading me on.
"if they want to talk to you, they'll find a way. and if they don't, it's just gonna be you constantly reaching out"
I've been doing this my entire 28 year life. I'm constantly the one who reaches out first. It is so rare for a girl to actually want to talk to me. I've never been confessed to once in my life never had a girl initiate any kind of physical contact, never been touched, so I guess I really have gone unloved and unwanted as I thought. I've always been the one to initiate a hug, and I honestly don't even care about that anymore. If a woman feels pressured to hug me back and does so, at least I got what I wanted and can know what physical contact feels like, 'cause I certainly won't get it any other way.
Bro I’m 25 and I can’t remember the last time I was hugged. It truly sucks.
@@KoolAidSquirt what really sucks is that when it does happen, it's so abnormal that we get normal, platonic affection, that a lot of guys get feelings for the girl who does it when she was just being nice. Then we get rejected and go back to being unwanted and untouched.
i have a european Goddess message me every day for the last 9 years. but guess what she's just being nice. she has a bf too but still messages me every day
In my experience, when a girl actually likes you, she won’t show it because she’s afraid of the potential possibility that you won’t like her. She’ll often give subtle hints but won’t be upfront about it at all.
It's the opposite for me. A girl will make it obvious she likes you by talking a lot with you or smiling at lot when she is talking with you and doesn't make things difficult if you want to get together with her.
It depends on her confidence level. staring into your soul and smiling then laughing at anything you say. Shy girls avoid eye contact but they show it other ways like fixing their hair and being awkward
@@rascal211 Only works for the 1%ers. Because they are a catch and thus something for said women to show off. If you're less "high value" in the general belief, she wont because it makes them look like bad too.
lol bro you don’t get a lot of women then, they’re so obvious if they like you.
Thank you so much for making this. A lot of us men really get
Confused
By
Some woman’s or most of their mixed signals. This is huge to note. This could’ve saved me a lot of time, money and pain a year ago that Oom
E 7 months
To get
Over a girl that was just enjoying my company in bed, living with
Me for a few
Months and almost having my baby(!). I would’ve spent the rest of my life with this woman, if given the chance, and now looking back a year later and watching this video, I asked myself what was I thinking so glad to have a new perspective and dodging so many bullets of women seemingly interested. No thanks. This guy
Doesn’t eat only “affection crumbs” like he used to… that’s so messed up how women are seriously encouraged to be narcissist in our society more so now than ever before, in the history of mankind.
Me a lot
I wish I had somebody like you in my twenties to give me this advice, it would have saved me a lot of wasted time. Excellent information!!
5:26 I am going to be honest, this is so incredibly insulting. Not from you Courtney, you're just delivering the message and I appreciate that because people need to hear this.
I wouldn't feel heartbroken, I would feel disgusted by her for looking down on me. Maybe it's just me, but a girl scared to tell me the truth out of fear of hurting me is underestimating just how much life has thrown at me and turned me into someone strong. Sorry but you rejecting me won't crush me, thinking that it will is a poor judgement of who I am and thinking too highly of yourself.
The best rejection I have been through is the girl telling me up front that she just does not want a relationship. The rest of them tried to avoid telling me, one even saying she didn't want to make me cry. I did cry but more than anything I was disgusted. Would you rather reject me upfront and make me cry, or avoid rejecting me until you feel like it's convenient, make me cry and then make me hate you?
Respect soldier. Respect. This comment needs to be seen by everyone
Fair point
Damn, that's a good point. You're right, I hate it when women do this. There's just something so disingenuous and nefarious about giving a guy hope, making him think you like him, only to let him down when the date is getting close. This is far, far worse than simply letting the man know that you're not interested as soon as he asks you out. There are exceptions, of course. I had a girl who used to like me in high school (I'm not 100% sure she did, but almost everything pointed to yes). She was beautiful and I couldn't believe she was into me, but silly me got together with another girl in the meantime. Once I'd broke up with that girl, I asked this other girl out and she said yes at first. We set a date, a location and everything. The day before the date, she cancelled, saying she had some personal issues to deal with. I got pissed, told her that she'd wasted my time, which obviously pissed her off. It was only after that I realized she actually did have an appointment with her psychologist that day and literally couldn't make it. That made me feel like a knob, and even to this day, I think about that from time to time. 😅
It's like my ex she cheated on me and didn't tell me for over a year until after we split up "I didn't want to hurt you I just wanted to forget about it." Like bitch lying to me is more hurtful than the truth! If she had told me at the time we might of worked things out because I am Poly so I don't mind its the lack of honesty ya know? Watching it go down hill for no reason was confusing.
Tell
The
Truth!
A lot of them told me because I asked direct questions after 1 or 2 weeks. They won't even tell the truth until they have wasted atleast 5 to 7 days of your time 🤔
I like an instructor at my gym, she is beautiful. A good friend told me, if she has smiled you and talked to you; then, invite her out; I am like: "I like that you are trying to cheer me up to make a move, but she works here, she smile to everybody, it's customer service, and the time she talked to me was a work conversation about the PT I have with her coworker. Besides, I struggle to talk to her, even small talk".
We usually misinterpreted friendly women.
Hey man… you’ll never know if you don’t shoot your shot. 🤷♂️
@crandonborth1626 Yes, good advice, but let's take into consideration some things:
1-She now has a boyfriend, and she looks happy. That's the most important thing, no a dumbass shy idiot with a crush. Besides, by seeing her boyfriend, it's easy to see that I'm her type.
2- I think you didn't pay attention to the video. That's her workplace, and I go every day to burn myself down. It's not wise to follow your example and make her uncomfortable.
It's fine. It is a child fantasy to believe that everybody desires happiness ✌🏼
The sad thing for me is I'm not messaging insta models, I'm not messaging stripers and I don't hang out with hoes. I message normal, good girls. I feel like like I'm pretty successful, engineer at a national lab. Make good money. I've done everything right so far but 🤷♂️ none of that matters haha If she doesn't like you. She doesn't like you. And that's okay.
Appreciated hearing your insights.
Every idiot on earth will tell to lift weights but you could be as ripped as the Rock and she still not like you. And then they will tell you there are billions of women.
Visit some countries where the women actually WANT a good man. Dont ask anybodys opinion. Show back up with a wife.
Its not ok. If you were white with that kind of status you would automatically pull a 5. And getting a 6 or 7 would not be impossible.
i am on the verge of quitting social media. it's just too psyhco and everyone has developed some narcistic traits. It's usually just "me, me, me"...
Definitely. I'm thinking about selling my phone and getting rid of all my social media (except for RUclips). Society is getting more superficial by the day and the most prudent thing would be to just stop cold turkey with all this surface level shite. My generation will all have such awful mid-life crises.
I did it months ago and I would recommend to do so the fact I have felt great for months now is amazing it’s a different type of good when you feel good for like 99% of the time instead of just good here and there because of a dopamine hit or something
Hope you gave it a try! Deactivated Facebook and Messenger for 6 months and felt great, back on Facebook now but primarily to upload artwork, same with Instagram. Using practically no chat services that don't involve work/business or planning meetings, and the silence is golden. Been some whiny people who think I'm upset with them or who complain about how they're supposed to get in touch (the latter usually the same people who only want to text and cancel meetups consistently). Found that people contact me when they actually want something as opposed to when they're bored these days.
@@salthcreative5540 I kid you not!! I replied to you and my answer go deleted. I did NOT use any profane or triggering words. I just wrote how I did try it out and it has changed my life for the better. (My time is limited to write it again.) The heck is going on with RUclips?
@@NoctLightCloud The hell? Damn site is going mental.
Anyways, good to hear it turned out well!
This girl has the most soothing voice.
Thanks for advices Courtney. They are real gold. I just want to say that man needs to trust his own feeling. Feeling never lies. We are the ones who neglect it because we want to believe in something that is not.
What hurts the most is the day you hear no dude I don't see you that way you're just a friend
That's melting 😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂
Casually explained channel actually explained the concept perfectly.
This is 100% true. I have been through all of the things she said in the video. If a girl likes you they will make sure you notice :) .
I would say that it depends on cultural setting. Some cultures have (traditionally) so weird social rules that the girl cannot take the first step so signalling is really messed up. I'm pretty sure I missed a couple of girls when I was young because I was so socially ackward.
12min to explain this? This Indirect Game is shit, man!
Direct Game is so much better : in the first 3 to 4 min as you talk to the girl, pull the trigger and tell her you like her for this or that reason and that you would like to take her on a date.
- If she smiles and says "nope", she was being nice. You thank her for her honesty and you move on. You both saved an incredible amount of time
- If she smiles and says "yep", she likes you. You just got yourself an instant-date with a girl you like and likes you.
Boom. Done. 3 min to know it. Direct Game rules. Next Problem
Agreed, best approach is the 50/50 approach...ask her out if she really likes you she will accept, if not she will decline. Saves you lots of time and effort of trying to decode her behaviour
You nailed the whole complicated process in one move.Well Done!!
You are smooth as silk
This doesn’t work either. A girl said yes to me and still ghosted me. And you can’t say that it was my personality because she knew me for about a year before I asked.
@@TheseEyesSeeDarknessClearly7 I'm sorry you got ghosted. I will say thought, you made here two "mistakes" that you can learn from and become better, thus lessening the chance of getting ghosted in the future.
First, don't put aside my "technique" because it didn't work on one girl. There are 3.5 billions women on the planet. Try it on at least 100 women and see what happens.
Second, you are critisizing my "technique" although you, yourself, admit that you did not do it! Careful about this. I said "in the first 3min to 4min". You said "She knew me for about a year" :D !
What happens here is, everybody, when we first meet someone, we inconsciously process "if that a potential lover or not?" And this process can take from 3 seconds (if who we have in front of us is incredibly repulsive to us, or incredibly attractive to us), to about 3 to 4 min, when we get to know a bit more about them.
After that process, we put those people in a box in our head : danger-ennemy, unknown-uninteresting, friendly, potential-lover, potential-life-partner.
Once we put someone in that box, it is INCREDIBLY hard to change that. This is why, the women who knew you for a year, she already had put you in one box, and 1 year later you made a request to change the box. Not happening.
This event "I made her change her mind" is extremely rare, I would say less than a 1% chance, but it's everybody's fantasy, this is why you will find it in every Hollywood movie or novel book. It's there, not because it's realistic, but specifically because it's almost impossible, thus they are selling us a dream. The problem comes when people watch those movies and start to believe that the normal world is like this...
Another way of saying it is : "99% of women you ever met in your life, if they did not put you in the "potential lover" box, is already lost to you forever and eternity".
This is why shitty PUA will sell products like "how to get your ex back" because they care about your money, not your relationship life.
And this is why every REAL PUA will always tell you : "it is SO MUCH EASIER to just go out there and find another woman".
Much love to you! I hope you will find someone who likes what you have to offer
i really appreciate the question of "is she working?" Because I have been a tutor and teaching assistant to students my age, and a few of them have expressed interest in me simply because I was polite to them and showed interest in their lives (I guess). I normally ask everyone how they are doing, and try to show all of my students that I care about them. I am extra nice when I am on the job, and it is to everyone, not just men. It is hard to show negative emotions to them because I could risk my job, and I really don't want to.
8:47 When a girl likes you, the conversation is going to be more in-depth, a little bit more deep of a conversation, and you're gonna be able to tell the difference
Spoiler: he could not.
Things like this might seem extremely obvious to women, but they are completely invisible to most men. Even if we do think that maybe this might be a sign that potentially there's something more, you'Re going to have either the guys that go for it no matter how slight the positive signs (and they're going to be wrong more often than not) or you're going to have the guys who back off because it's extremely ambiguous and he doesn't want to be called creep or pushy if he pursues this and he's wrong.
If it's not a LOUD, CLEAR, and OBVIOUS sign, men will not get it. Full stop.
Ladies if you want to tell your guy that you like him, TELL HIM. Even if you flat-out say "Hey I kinda like you, want to grab a coffee later?" Guys will STILL think 'maybe she's just being nice, I can't assume anything'.
With guys you literally cannot be too obvious. The overwhelming majority of us don't do subtle. Some of these tips are good, but some of the hints are about as obvious as telling guys to make sure she's not twiddling her thumbs counter-clockwise under the table while glancing to the east. Unless it's completely blatantly obvious, it does not work.
this is true
Does she like me? No
*Video over*
*Curb your enthusiasm theme plays*
Gents, just default to she's just being nice to you. She doesnt like you. She would never choose you over anyone else. She probably doesnt want to be talking to you right now and is simply enduring every moment she has to be in your vacinity. Simply be nice back, end the interaction as soon as possible and walk away. Stay strong and accept she probably didnt want to talk to you in the first place 👍
The sad thing is that the only reason a video such as this one exists is because there are soooo many dudes out there who've never gotten to feel how it feels to have a girl like you :(
Trust bro, it is glaringly obvious when they do, i went through primary, highschool and half of uni until a girl liked me and wanted to talk to me. Work on yourself bro and live your life good will come. Nothing worth getting ever came easy :)
@angelorganization “Work on yourself” is the cop out advice to end all cop out advice.
Its better to have no girls like you than to have toxic ones trying to take your soul
@@thejet4672 That’s easy to say when you have actually had girls like you.
@@donaldwobamajr6550 just work out and they'll like you when you're buff. Lot of shallow girls
I've recently discovered you channel and I must say that it's very informative. It's very frustrating how complicated relationships are,and the gap between men and women can seem as wide as the Grand Canyon. But,thank you for trying to makes things a little more clear,Courtney. Stay safe and have a wonderful day. :)
You are on to something with that Grand Canyon comment. 🤔
The last thing you said in this video is important. I know this girl in the gym. She is self confident but shy. Gives all kind of signs like positioning her self closse to where ever i am working out as if to say "Talk to me". But she never starts a conversation. She has no problem talking to other people, but with me seem to not be able to relax giving short answers. Id be sure she didnt like me if it wasnt for her "following me" seeking contact and during a conversation i had with another person and her, she straight up tells me "I will be here every tuesday this semester at this time"...
Every time I took a chance asking out a flirty, affectionate woman, I got shot down. I embarrassed myself so many times now I just assume these women are flirty and affectionate as a personality type. It bothered me for a while, but now I can ignore it.
I heard this when I was playing a video game from a character… “ son, it’s important to have very low expectations. That way you will not be disappointed.”
DAMMIT I'M OVER it!! I'm just gonna sit in my chair and eat ice cream and drink beer and get fat!!
When you get really buff and still nothing. The disappointment makes you never want to lift again but you do anyways.
Or you could just keep taking the change and ask in the future, too. If you have a match, it's great. Otherwise you lost a couple of seconds to ask and do not need to think about anymore because you know the real status.
Being embarassed just means that you weren't asking the question honestly - that is, truly interested to ask a question and know the true answer. If you ask any other question with yes/no answer, would you be embarassed by default for one answer?
This is a nice cold dose of reality. I'm going to save this one and put it on replay constantly.
Some of this was tough love, but got the answers I needed. Thank you; there's a reason you're the best. Cheers!
This is so much more awkward with the waitress sitting next to me in th3 car. I ain't getting any answers that make sense !
For me this is the rule of thumb: If she is nice to you, she is very likely want you to do something for her.
Not the cynic we want, but the cynic we need: you
Ladies: shut up you liar!!!
They hated him for telling the truth
Facts
This is a point-by-point exact description of all my work girlfriends, (and I am married, happily, for many years.) Not once have I ever flirted with them, or they with me, in an overt sense, but you know exactly what is happening when they find a reason to talk to you or touch you, or ask you a question and look right at you. So take your shot, if she's giving you these signs.
Thanks this is the advice I needed.
There was this girl whom worked in grocery shop as a cashier. She was always talking to me and stuff, then the other day I was in line and I saw she is talking to everybody, she was just being talkative. That was a sign for me she is not treating me special.
Courtney you just destroyed my whole self-esteem thank you