Childhood sexual assault takes all joy from life and leaves victims with complex PTSD. Some of us will never recover. We are hypervigilant and reactive. Sexual assault happens to men and women, and it destroys lives. Our species is failing its children.
@@perrinfan no of course not. As a survivor my self i could never justify it. But i think we are naive to think this is new, think ancient Rome. We just became better at hiding it.
@@GV_777YT I never suggested it is new. But I would like to suggest that we know much more now about how fantastically damaging it is and we have a responsibility to end it.
Both of you radiate love, trust, and vulnerability. It takes a lot of strength to share that, not only with each other but also with the viewers. Thank you Janet & Em!
Glad you are talking about this. This...type of after effect...PTSD, needs more understanding. Sexual assault & rape victims...we lose all sense of pleasure (intimate, social), what is or not appropriate. For me, there is always a guilt there. I even felt guilty enjoying sex with my husband at times. Like, I am betraying the trauma that happened to my younger self, that I had no control over, but still feel responsible. It's a lifelong hell honestly.
I don't think I've ever heard anyone explain the experience of sexual assault/trauma so eloquently as Em did here in just a few minutes. I'm gonna rewatch this later just to absorb it. Thank you both for your vulnerability. Your friendship is beautiful. Much love 💗
I had a very bad breakdown last night over previous assaults and something triggered my PTSD. I also had the worst dreams about it. I needed to see this video so much, to remember Im not alone
Wow, you both articulated that so well! I really relate to Janet and see me in her. I too, have always said i don't know how to laugh, how to be happy, how to love people other than my children, how not to shrink when i experience human touch. Ive learned people cant be trusted, its a F-up way to live life, your never really living. Its always forced and i just never knew where that came from. Your both so brave! I thank you for helping me tap in and tune into my own repressed emotions and the outcomes, because of my own experience of emotional and physical violations. Your amazing and my heart goes out to all the innocense lost by the hands of monsters.
Nicole, thank you for sharing your experience. I hear that you see yourself in me and that not knowing how to laugh, be happy, love people or be able to receive human touch is something that you, too, have experienced. I believe acknowledging this was the first step in reclaiming so much of what was taken from me. I want you to know that I hear you and I see you, and I am glad that you have gained more clarity to understand yourself.
I find myself after I had gotten assaulted that I threw myself into more hookups and even though I didn’t like it I continually tried to find my power and gain back my pleasure but all it really brought was more issues because I was ignore the fact that emotionally it was tearing me apart
K S luckily... I soon after decided to have therapy...not for my mind or emotional state...had sex therapy...so at least I could enjoy sex...never liked men...studied them... and could play them like a violin...if I wanted to...because 99% are governed by their cocks!
I also remember that I would have sex with people I didn't even like at all. I just wanted to feel myself. I wanted to experience my body, cause I felt like.. I need it with me. But with every sex partner I felt like.. Losing more of myself. I am very happy, I am not doing this anymore. But.. It's scary to be in a body I don't seem to know.
Every time when the question: "Why do you love me?" comes up I feel very similar to her. I don't know why I love a person, however I know I love a person because: I feel safe, they make me happy, their joy is my joy, their pain is my pain etc...
Safety, trust, and belonging are great foundations for love. I have gotten more clear on why I love as well. Thank you for sharing your experience, Nic.
So true. Sexual assault makes us feel “unworthy” of... anything. Even of feeling the pain of feeling so. And when we do, we open up - not just to pain, to beauty, too
A really moving video. I hope that they can release themselves of their pain and tension and feel free, safe and truly happy. You deserve it and thank you for your honesty and vulnerability!
Hi Renee! I hear that witnessing my experience has brought you back to what you have been avoiding daily. I completely understand why we have avoided it, and it makes sense. Please know you're not alone.
god her talking about distracting herself with academia and career goals and just this entire thing has too many parallels to my own life. why is everything so painful
Wow I'm so amazed and grateful for these beautiful, strong, vulnerable women... What a beautiful relationship, thank you so much for sharing your experiences with this platform 🙏🏽❤️
Wow, these women are both really brave and very aware of their own progress and what they need to work on to be their best and live their best lives. I wish them both nothing but the best 🙂
I relate so much w/ Janet at 8:35 To avoid my inner emotions and dating, I got my BS in biology and currently finishing my Masters in biology I just want to consume myself in work
Hi Gigi, I hear that you have also kept yourself busy in order to avoid the inner pain. It makes sense that we did that. If it helps to ease your nervous system, know that you will not be alone when you do decide to explore what you feel. It may hurt, but it will help you heal. I see you! I hear you! (My IG: @rodriguezjanet_)
I have to disassociate into a fantasy of one of us not being ourselves. In order to enjoy it. But then. When I pretend to be someone else. I am sabotaging my healing. Reinforcing my disassociation. It would take HOURS of foreplay to reconnect with myself and body. Takes a patient man that loves you. Never had that.
Sexual assault completely stripes away everything you knew about yourself and even harder when it happens as a child. You question any type of sexual or intimate pleasure, she was correct about it's blocked and it sucks. Only reason I'm not some type of lady of the night or in the sex industry is because of the grace of GOD. Many Blessings to these beautiful women😍
@@ERNIE555 Wow. Have some social tact. Now is not the time or place for religious debate, if someone found something that helped them cope with their trauma who are you to mock it, even if you don't believe in it? Shameful.
Correct ladies its called manifestation. Things that we think and say go straight into the universe (and so it shall be). Be it something positive or negative.
Non consensual circumcision is a problem young baby boys around the world have been suffering from for centuries. Where's our representation? I'm offended by the lack of it.
it seems like men only ever bring up their lack of representation when women are speaking about their traumas. If you want to watch that content then just look for it, there's plenty of it here on the platform. The issue is that you don't want to look that up, you just want to make women feel like they should shut up about their experiences. What did you hope you comment would do? You are acting emotionally childish and throwing a fit because the situation at hand isn't about you and is making you uncomfortable. Maybe this seat at the table isn't for you this time, maybe you need to go sit at the kids table for this one and GROW UP!
@@leonineaugust By saying men only bring up their traumas when women do is a disservice to all people's traumas. I'm offended that you're that close-minded and bigoted to shut men out of a conversation of trauma. Wow.
“Love isn’t logical and words just put me in my mind” I don’t know why but I love the way she explained that
I was going to comment this exact phrase too because words and languages has been such a huge struggle for me. And I just love that phrase.
Childhood sexual assault takes all joy from life and leaves victims with complex PTSD. Some of us will never recover. We are hypervigilant and reactive. Sexual assault happens to men and women, and it destroys lives. Our species is failing its children.
its been happening since ancient times tho.
@@GV_777YT So?
@@GV_777YT What is your point? Does this make it justified?
@@perrinfan no of course not. As a survivor my self i could never justify it. But i think we are naive to think this is new, think ancient Rome. We just became better at hiding it.
@@GV_777YT I never suggested it is new. But I would like to suggest that we know much more now about how fantastically damaging it is and we have a responsibility to end it.
Both of you radiate love, trust, and vulnerability. It takes a lot of strength to share that, not only with each other but also with the viewers. Thank you Janet & Em!
Glad you are talking about this. This...type of after effect...PTSD, needs more understanding. Sexual assault & rape victims...we lose all sense of pleasure (intimate, social), what is or not appropriate. For me, there is always a guilt there. I even felt guilty enjoying sex with my husband at times. Like, I am betraying the trauma that happened to my younger self, that I had no control over, but still feel responsible. It's a lifelong hell honestly.
Thank you for sharing!!
When janet Said there is a huge blockade that inhibits pleasure and joy I felt seen!!!
I see you!!
I don't think I've ever heard anyone explain the experience of sexual assault/trauma so eloquently as Em did here in just a few minutes. I'm gonna rewatch this later just to absorb it. Thank you both for your vulnerability. Your friendship is beautiful. Much love 💗
I had a very bad breakdown last night over previous assaults and something triggered my PTSD. I also had the worst dreams about it. I needed to see this video so much, to remember Im not alone
you are never alone darling. sending love and light
Yessss.
I’m so glad these two had each other. They understand so much about the world and each other, so wise together❤️
That was beautiful. Such a deep, meaningful, supportive and loving friendship. I want one like that too ☺️
Innocence is lost by ignoring the voices of the innocent!!
this conversation and connection embodies pure love to me, I don't have any other words to say... just, wow
Wow, you both articulated that so well! I really relate to Janet and see me in her. I too, have always said i don't know how to laugh, how to be happy, how to love people other than my children, how not to shrink when i experience human touch. Ive learned people cant be trusted, its a F-up way to live life, your never really living. Its always forced and i just never knew where that came from. Your both so brave! I thank you for helping me tap in and tune into my own repressed emotions and the outcomes, because of my own experience of emotional and physical violations. Your amazing and my heart goes out to all the innocense lost by the hands of monsters.
Nicole, thank you for sharing your experience. I hear that you see yourself in me and that not knowing how to laugh, be happy, love people or be able to receive human touch is something that you, too, have experienced. I believe acknowledging this was the first step in reclaiming so much of what was taken from me. I want you to know that I hear you and I see you, and I am glad that you have gained more clarity to understand yourself.
I find myself after I had gotten assaulted that I threw myself into more hookups and even though I didn’t like it I continually tried to find my power and gain back my pleasure but all it really brought was more issues because I was ignore the fact that emotionally it was tearing me apart
K S luckily... I soon after decided to have therapy...not for my mind or emotional state...had sex therapy...so at least I could enjoy sex...never liked men...studied them... and could play them like a violin...if I wanted to...because 99% are governed by their cocks!
I did the same thing
I can totally relate to this.
I also remember that I would have sex with people I didn't even like at all. I just wanted to feel myself. I wanted to experience my body, cause I felt like.. I need it with me. But with every sex partner I felt like.. Losing more of myself. I am very happy, I am not doing this anymore. But.. It's scary to be in a body I don't seem to know.
Every time when the question: "Why do you love me?" comes up I feel very similar to her. I don't know why I love a person, however I know I love a person because: I feel safe, they make me happy, their joy is my joy, their pain is my pain etc...
Safety, trust, and belonging are great foundations for love. I have gotten more clear on why I love as well. Thank you for sharing your experience, Nic.
You learn to mimic the people closest to you, if they have what you think looks like LOVE. Sometimes it is the only way to survive the memories😢
It's heartbreaking to see the pain on Janet's face...sending both of them my prayers and love
Thank you for seeing me, Noella. It has been a painful experience to live with.
janet"s facial reactions while Em answering is mesmerising..
So true. Sexual assault makes us feel “unworthy” of... anything. Even of feeling the pain of feeling so. And when we do, we open up - not just to pain, to beauty, too
A really moving video. I hope that they can release themselves of their pain and tension and feel free, safe and truly happy. You deserve it and thank you for your honesty and vulnerability!
Wow, Janet brought me right back to "those" things I've literally tried avoiding daily.
Hi Renee! I hear that witnessing my experience has brought you back to what you have been avoiding daily. I completely understand why we have avoided it, and it makes sense. Please know you're not alone.
I applaud your honesty and vulnerability .. it takes a lot of courage to say to thousands of people...
beautiful I'm sorry you had to go through that
god her talking about distracting herself with academia and career goals and just this entire thing has too many parallels to my own life. why is everything so painful
Wow I'm so amazed and grateful for these beautiful, strong, vulnerable women... What a beautiful relationship, thank you so much for sharing your experiences with this platform 🙏🏽❤️
You are most welcome, Mira! Thank you for witnessing us.
@@JanetRodriguez23 Ahww, you're so welcome!
Thank you for this articulate, deep, and honest conversation!!!! ❤
Wow, these women are both really brave and very aware of their own progress and what they need to work on to be their best and live their best lives. I wish them both nothing but the best 🙂
So relatable and true. I appreciate this so much. I feel less alone and less messed up because I feel just like this.
You are not alone!
I relate so much w/ Janet at 8:35
To avoid my inner emotions and dating, I got my BS in biology and currently finishing my Masters in biology
I just want to consume myself in work
Hi Gigi, I hear that you have also kept yourself busy in order to avoid the inner pain. It makes sense that we did that. If it helps to ease your nervous system, know that you will not be alone when you do decide to explore what you feel. It may hurt, but it will help you heal. I see you! I hear you! (My IG: @rodriguezjanet_)
I‘ve always wondered how one applies for a THE AND video 🤔 or how they find fitting persons. Does anyone know? Watched their videos for forever
Ella I bet they have a website
I love both of you because you’re brave and beautiful.
It’s hard to put love into words. Its too big. Hope we all have a hug like that at least once
I appreciate both of them SO much for doing this and am sending a telepathic hug 💖
No one should go through this! Especially a child!
So sad and beautiful at the same time...
I love you both so much and I appreciate your vulnerability.💚💚💚
Why do people not fear their Creator enough to not abuse the next person? Do humans think they can just do what they want? Justice will be served
People are starting to figure out that there is no god
Thank you both for being brave in talking about your experiences. And hope you two will be able to heal in time.💛
EDMR might be a great method for those who suffered from this to process their trauma!
Sending so much love to both. Janet you deserve so much love xo you are so strong. Ps please do part 2
Thank you, Lucy! I want you to know I am on a journey of reclaiming my birthright to love, safety, and happiness.
I have to disassociate into a fantasy of one of us not being ourselves. In order to enjoy it. But then. When I pretend to be someone else. I am sabotaging my healing. Reinforcing my disassociation.
It would take HOURS of foreplay to reconnect with myself and body. Takes a patient man that loves you. Never had that.
More of these vidéos plzz .
I relate to this so damn much...
I hear you and I see you, Asha!
@@JanetRodriguez23 ❤
Sirens!
OK, loved her voice.
wow this is so beautiful!!!
Sexual assault completely stripes away everything you knew about yourself and even harder when it happens as a child. You question any type of sexual or intimate pleasure, she was correct about it's blocked and it sucks. Only reason I'm not some type of lady of the night or in the sex industry is because of the grace of GOD.
Many Blessings to these beautiful women😍
What sucks is it’s also in the past and you can’t really talk about it. It’s just a part of you.
The grace of god...that watched..while your innocence was smashed....!?
@@ERNIE555 Wow. Have some social tact. Now is not the time or place for religious debate, if someone found something that helped them cope with their trauma who are you to mock it, even if you don't believe in it? Shameful.
tasha b so I am not entitled to have an opinion.....stop judging you religious 🥜
Your God watched it happen . . . .
This is my new favorite Skin Deep session❤️
Does love have reason? "Love isnt logical and worss just put me in my mind"
Am i tripping or does Janet sound a lot like Bette Porter/Jen Beals?
Aww thanks! I guess when you stan someone you want to project them on anyone/anything 😂
em's voice really reminds me of liv from made in chelsea
Correct ladies its called manifestation. Things that we think and say go straight into the universe (and so it shall be). Be it something positive or negative.
Thanks ❤
friendship?
First comment yey 🎉
Xei
perpetual self-victimization is becoming the norm unfortunately.
Non consensual circumcision is a problem young baby boys around the world have been suffering from for centuries. Where's our representation? I'm offended by the lack of it.
I agree this is a problem for sure. 🙏
Just like a man to jump in here and try and turn this conversation between women towards some unrelated topic involving men. Color me not surprised.
it seems like men only ever bring up their lack of representation when women are speaking about their traumas. If you want to watch that content then just look for it, there's plenty of it here on the platform. The issue is that you don't want to look that up, you just want to make women feel like they should shut up about their experiences. What did you hope you comment would do? You are acting emotionally childish and throwing a fit because the situation at hand isn't about you and is making you uncomfortable. Maybe this seat at the table isn't for you this time, maybe you need to go sit at the kids table for this one and GROW UP!
@@leonineaugust you hit the nail right on the head thank you
@@leonineaugust By saying men only bring up their traumas when women do is a disservice to all people's traumas. I'm offended that you're that close-minded and bigoted to shut men out of a conversation of trauma. Wow.