French vs American Weddings: Did you know these 9 differences?
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- Опубликовано: 27 июл 2024
- Welcome to this video about French and American weddings! Did you think that getting married in France was similar to getting married in the United States? French and American weddings have many differences from the timing, to the bridesmaids, the alcohol we drink (hello champagne!) and even how many ceremonies we have! I’ll talk you through the biggest differences I see between the two cultures, but I’m sure I didn’t get everything! Please comment below if you’ve got some fun differences to add and don’t hesitate to check out the corresponding article on my blog here:
#gettingmarriedinfrance #frenchwedding #americanwedding #americanvsfrenchweddings
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Video may be helpful for people searching for: Getting married in France, Differences between American and French weddings, Getting married in the USA, getting married in France for foreigners, how to get married in France.
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We have bridesmaids in France. They are called " Demoiselles d'honneur ". But you don't have to.
Thanks for the insight Claire! I've personally never been to a wedding with demoiselles d'honneur. The only thing i have ever seen are temoins. It must not be as popular.
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified the "demoiselles d'honneur" are usually the little girls accompanying the bride (the one with the flowers or with the rings or the ones lifting the veil so it doesn't get dirty on the ground) if it's a boy, we say "garçon d'honneur" (at least in the part of France I'm from 😉)
A real "pièce montée" is always made of "Choux à la crème" glued together with caramel generally in a tall conic or any decorative shape. It is always spectacular, delicious and goes so well with Champagne !
How cute that their speeches are so individual and over the top! I love that!
There's something that I've noticed in multiple films and series : why do the bride and the groom seem to leave the party so early in the US?? Here in France, they stay until the last guest.
In France, it's actually considered SUPER rude to leave before 1 am. Which is extremely annoying to be honest... but just like you said, that's because our freaking dinners take FOREVER.
The party goes on and on and won't stop until the bride throws her panties to the crowd, blows a kiss to the crowd and retires with the groom in the ante-chambre .
Civil marriages are, in France, not done at the court house (unlike PACS) but the city hall.
Leebpascal1 good point!
In planning a french wedding, that's 1/2 to 1 bottle of champagne per guest.
those lucky French ;)
1 bottle is better.
@@marcmarc8524 last new year's eve, we planned 1/2 bottle each, due to the fact that girl drink less, we ended with a bottle and a half for each guys....
Correct me if I'm wrong but in France témoins and bridesmaids are two different things. The bride and the groom need one witness each and then can have bridesmaids too! And bridesmaids don't have to sign anything, just help the bride :)
"You are the bride's biatch". I can't handle this 🤣😂
I don't think I would ever get used to the fact you guys eat so fast. I love a good everlasting dinner on special occasions
The castel things and over the top wedding are a thing of the last 20 years. The fact is that you are actually not invited to the dinner is a blessing sometimes knowing that the thing last till 4 am !!
And after all those feasting the whole night at a French wedding, guests are treated with steaming hot onion soup with croûtons and grated cheese before going to bed. So yummy 😜
So glad you're back! fun and informative wedding info
E. ATregoat thanks! Glad to be back 😻
What a wonderful video, so insightful! French weddings sound like a lot of fun! :))
Thanks Janey! Glad you liked it :)
The biggest difference for me between the PACS and marriage is that you can break up the PACS extremely easily, without any lawyers or even having to spend any money at all.
That is very true. Getting un PACs is a breeze. I've never divorced, but i can imagine that adminstration wise, it must be a mess!
PACS is a fairly new thing that was introduced by the governement of Lionel Jospin in 1998, created primarily as a means to provide recognition in law for same-sex couples and opposite-sex couples recognised as living together.
Another difference is when one of the partners died. Pacs given right on the only alive.
The food served at the cocktail is absolutely fabulous ! And then the dinner is out of this world !
This was so helpful. My Anglo-French wedding in weeks and you helped me realise I’m not going mad!!
Actually, in some family in France (mine and my husband for example), we start the wedding in the morning. My civil ceremony was at 10 am, then at 11 am we had the religious ceremony, the cocktail (or "vin d'honneur") at 12h30, and then we started the meal around 3h30 pm to around 7h30 pm. Then a little break, and the party began at 9h pm to 6h am. And then on the next day we a kind of informal meal with all our closed one we call "retour de mariage". So in my family, a wedding take up a whole week-end. Wich is great because you spend so much time preparing for it, better have time to enjoy it! (but it's a little tirering for the bride and the broom...)
As always, sorry for my mistakes in english!
In France you don't expect your témoins to wear THE colour of the outfits you choose for them , just because they dress as they please. I would have talked about that because to me that is a HUGE difference (just picturing a row of two/three American
bridemaids all in the same mauve dress..:)
Instablaster
Weddings in US weren't so ridiculously over-the-top in the 20th Century. I'm not sure when this $$$$$$ wedding hoopla started in the 21st Century but it keeps getting more and more outrageous.
Another great one. Merci! 🥂
That's so true about French speeches vs. American! I'm a Frenchie who got married in the US to my American husband. My family and friends who flew over from France planned this massive skit with props, costumes, and video interviews. You're right that it's usually interactive and very funny. Our American guests could not believe it that skit is the #1 thing everyone remembers about our wedding. It's such a fun tradition but also a lot of pressure on the siblings and "temoins"!
I totally agree! The pressure is enormous to come up with something really clever and funny, but when you do it's completely unforgettable!
They do the same thing in US weddings
Your hair and haircut here is THE BEST I EVER SEEN and also when you put your hair up!
This hair is so INCREDIBLE LOVELY as NATURAL and so AMUSING to see it.
Please wear it like that most or all the time !
Your video was very interesting ! :D I think what's interesting today is that French people are more and more influenced by american weddings. For example, wedding on the beach or in the country side is more and more popular, and above all, everything regarding the bachelor and bachelorette party (even trips) that did not exist before and is now almost mandatory, and also the bridesmaid(s), that did not exist before (only "témoin"), which helps the bride before and during the wedding.
Not everyone can afford that kind of wedding in France. More like someone living in the seizième in Paris. I am just a surfer dude from the Landes (south west of France) some of my friends just had a casual wedding that ended with a bonfire at a beach, a guitar, singing and a lot of beer. :-)
I am from the countryside in France and the wedding are huge and laat to the next morning.
In france the only legal marriage officiant is the mayor of the town or a deputy mayor. Religious wedding ceremonies can be performed by a priest but they have absolutly no legal value. Moreover, a religious wedding is illegal if there has not been a civil wedding before.
The priest who performs a religious wedding not preceeded by a civil wedding can be sentenced to 6 months in jail and 7500 euros fine.
5:59 "most people are getting married in castle" . damn, I'm learning something about my own country lol
Just wanted to say that your hair is beautiful in this video!!!
Your comparisons on US/French traditions are instructive. You talked about the ceremony cake, the "pièce montée" but you didn't say if you thought it was good, ahahhah! For your next videos, keep telling us about the sociological differences that you analyze well on these 2 countries.
Oh well i figured that it goes without saying how much i love the "piece montee"! But I did write a corresponding article on my blog and im pretty sure i mentioned how much i loved it there :) Thanks for the feedback! unintentionallyfrenchified.com/2019/02/21/did-you-know-these-9-differences-between-french-and-american-weddings/
Piece montée taste good but it is difficult to make small parts and the caramel is very sticky, but it is so good!!!!😍😍
Hello Kate! 😀 Nice video, and glad I've just discovered your channel. I wanted to react to some of the things you mentionned. I'm always open to discuss it. Actually, it's not the majority of French people that have wedding receptions in castles, simply because not everyone can afford it... Something else is, we usually have more people at the reception/ party and less at the ceremony; we usually have our family and closest friends at the ceremony (less people). And "the second category" can actually be welcomed at the ceremony (civil or church), but I think that depending on how close they are to the people getting married they'll attend / they'll make arrangement plans to go to the ceremony 🙂
Hello! happy to hear you love the channel! Of course everyone doesnt get married in a castle, neither did I. But the point I was trying to make is there are a lot of castles in France and people do get married in them. It's not possible in the states so even one wedding that you attend in a castle,, seems wow! Yea, the inviting people to certain parts of the day is a really new concept for a lot of americans!
Great video!! You're totaly right, we (as a french person) are inviting more people to the ceremony than the reception, but it seems not rude to us because these person are neitghbourgs or people that are currently working with us, but we are not very close to. And the day after the wedding, maybe not everywhere, there is a brunch. It's with less people than the reception, mainly the close family and the gests that are comming from far away 😊
And the pièce montée is the best part!! Love it 😂😂😂
The piece montee is amazing! :)
In France "Champagne never ends !" I wish it was true ;)
Je viens de découvrir ta chaine, j'aime beaucoup. Pouce bleu !
One small thing you didn't mentionned but probably explain the "double ceremony" in France : In France, priests have no legal power to marry people.
Church marriages in France are only a traditionnal thing and hold zero legal value (at best, performing one can prove that you're living together with another person, for a "civil union").
It probably dates back to the Revolution, when the Catholic Chuch was stripped of all ther powers and the civil records (birth, marriages, deaths) were moved to the town hall.
Note that France recognize marriages officially made in other countries no matter how, so religious marriages made in any country that allow priests/churches to make legal marriages will be legal in France.
The Catholic Church follows the law of the country so will not marry a couple who isn't already civilly married.
Lovely video! 😀
Thanks!
I was a bridesmaid to my sister’s wedding in the United States when I was twenty. I was far too inexperienced then to be of any help or advice and served mainly as a decoration. Yes, I have also been to several weddings in France. Usually here people really feast a lot. Before there were live orchestras which were less noisy than disco music.
Alexia Alex-Sandra the feasting is a highlight!!
Actually, the rights of PACS and marriage are not exactly the same. You have little less tax beneficits when you're "pacsé" and the retirement pension rights of the person you're "pacsé" with, in case you die, is the not the same. But in the end, the rights are not that different.
ahh good to know! I thought they were exactly the same :)
Paul ya i agree, the main thing in my experience is that it doesn’t give you the right to a visa... you have to have your own visa and then you have to prove that you’ve lived with your partner for at least 1 year before you can apply for the family visa, that gives you the right to work full time and stuff.
@@theMad155 That's interesting Madeline because my visa was completely linked to my partner due to our pacs. It was the easiest way for me to stay in France when my visa was expiring and I didn't have a CDI proposal. Has the law changed recently and its harder to get?
Unintentionally Frenchified Ya, but you have to already have a visa to prolong it? I got pacsed and then we left France for two years. When it came time to come back we learned that you can’t just get a visa for the pacsed partner :( I had to figure out my own visa. But now that I have a visa it should be easy to renew it with the pacs as justification. I hope ;)
@@theMad155 ahhh i had no idea. I would imagine renewing your visa won't be a problem now that everything is sorted!
I was my sister's bridesmaid. IT WAS A NIGHTMARE!
So true ! ) thanks
Thank you for reminding me weddings. My wife and I just passed the 50 years wedding anniversary and so far it has been so much fun. Our administrative wedding (mariage civil) occurred 6 days prior to our religious wedding and was celebrated by our mayor. On someone else wedding in Normandy, We have been demonstrated the trou Normand. You have a normal coktail, drinks, dance and then dinner. Then the ambiance slows down a bit. Time for the "Trou Normand". Marascin ice cream with quite some Calvados. Then a bit of dancing and then a second dinner with drinks of course, deserts, champagne, dance. We escaped around 5:00 AM and I drove very very slowly (only using 1st and 2nd gears). The next day we were like zombies but this was fun.
In the part of the US I live in (Oklahoma), it can be normal to just be invited to the reception (party after the wedding) but if you're invited to the ceremony then you're invited to the reception.
Francesca Hart interesting! I had no idea that something similar exists in the US and I’m à Midwest girl too 😀
Really interesting about the toasts, from the two family weddings I’ve been to I was really surprised that they’re weren’t toasts by the parents. My French father in law told me that, his children know how much he loves them and he doesn’t need to tell the wedding guests that since it’s not their business. I have some weddings this summer and am looking forward to some over the top toasts though :) thanks for sharing!
I hope you get a good one this summer! The last wedding we were at , the groom's temoins made a book that they passed around with his most embarrassing photos of all time. It was hilarious, but just way more effort and planning than i normally see!
Unintentionally Frenchified so fun :)
Totaly right! Parents are not always making speechs. But when they do, it is often the dads that make a speech (sorry for my english...)
I'm French and my wife is American. One thing she expected me to do was proposing the way we see it in American movies. Of course I thought that was only movie stuff. Oh! And she also expected a wedding ring with a stone the size of an asteroid!
Hahaha 🤣❤️
Well you know what Marilyn Monroe said... "Diamond, it's a girl's best friend." You may not last, but the stone will. :)
Hi Kate! I'm a long time fan and subscriber of your RUclips channel. I've always found your videos so delightful, informative and entertaining that I thought perhaps you may be able to offer some insight with respect to eloping to Paris in February. I've already found two independent elopement companies that seem trustworthy but was curious if you had any personal recommendations or advice on the matter? That said, no worries either way and thank you kindly for your time. Wishing you, Robin and Eleanor the very best ☺️
P.s. if this subject is of interest to you, I think it would be great to tackle on your channel.
In Brazil, everybody is invited to both the ceremony and the reception, but some choose not to go to the ceremony and would rather go straight to the party, and it's all right!
Interesting insight! I had no idea!
In the UK we invite close family and friends to the full day and then do "evening invites" for acquaintances who arrive around 7/8pm for the 'evening' portion of dancing and drinking. When my French boyfriend said they do it the other way round and expect people to leave I thought it was so rude 😅
Cesca Corinne i just went to an UK wedding recently and noticed the evening invites! That sounds WAY more appropriate to me 🤪
My brother has maried a japanese. She was so surprised because in Japan, the guests pay for the ceremony and it tooks 2 or 3 hours max because you pay the hall by hour XD
Yes i totaly understand that is sounding rude, actually, in the cases i know the people who are not invited to the party are grandmas or people that wouldn't stay if they were invited or forced themselves to stay. The night is very long, and it seems rude when you decide to quit at the very first beginning. In order to prevent that, parent with very young children, grandparents and people that you know will be sitting in a chair watching everyone dancing and waiting for the right time to go, are not invited. It might seem very rude when those invitations are not well made, but (in my family at least) it was not to «force» people staying late if they weren't abble or used to stay late in weddings.
As a french person (who have only experienced french weddings), I don't think we see it as "you are expected to leave" but more like "it was already nice of them to invite you in the first place". Because couples can't accomodate everybody (if I'm not mistaken, wedding budgets in France are not as big as the US ones, although it's already very expensive), the vin d'honneur is an occasion to invite people who are not so close (like coworkers, neighbors, coworkers of the parents of the couple, very distant relatives, etc...) or can't stay the whole night (like elderly people) but still make them part of the wedding.
To make a loose (and not perfect) comparison, I'd say it's a bit like if you went for an afternoon coffee at your friends house, and they received friends or family for dinner. You don't expect to be invited to stay for that dinner.
Also, there is the thing with the wedding gifts. If you stay for dinner, it's expected of you to buy a gift from the wedding list, or to give money. And I recently heard that there are some families where it's expected from each guest to give you as much money as what they costed you for the dinner (I really don't understand that one, and it seems people don't agree on it). So actually, being invited to a wedding can be pretty costly. So being only invited to the vin d'honneur can make it less expensive for you.
Also, I think it would be weird to have people only turning up for the evening, because we would be like "so you just came for the food and not the ceremony ?"
It's the same way in France then 😃
I live in the US we go over the top for the wedding I think it depends on the culture of the people of what wedding you are going to.
Absolutely! It's hard to generalize for everyone.
Yes it is very normal to not attend a full wedding ceremony here in france. In july i was invited to a friends wedding, but only to the morning mass and the evening buffet. Not the meal in between, I actually had to go to the church, leave, and come back in the evening lol
And they had a champagn fountain lol
My whats up no 9001745151
Wow, thats really so different for me!
In Ireland we always have day wedding guests who are then joined by evening guests.
Interesting! I wasn't sure if that was something we find in other cultures too!
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified In the Netherlands as well.
Kerry Edwards Same in France a lot of people only join for the afters.
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified And in the UK. Often the close family and friends are invited to the wedding ceremony and the sit-down meal, then other friends and family come to the party/dance and may (or may not!) have a buffet meal.
I live in Germany but I'm American, married to a German. There is definitely MUCH less fuss about the engagement ring here (let alone the three-month rule, the "ooooh lemme see the ring!" squeals, etc) If women wear engagement rings, it's usually a small solitaire on one hand with a simple silver or gold band is on the other. (I've often seen women wearing a simple metal band with tiny diamonds in it, very pretty)
Did you have an engagement ring?! What have you noticed about the culture of engagement rings in France?
Very interesting video
You speak very well because I understand your English 😁
jdimbo13 thanks!
Cool video! I'm spanish and I also find many differents between our weddings and the ones I have attended in France. Many of them are about the same subjets but they are no even similar to the american ones!
Lucía Vidal P. Thanks Lucia! You’ll have to do a French vs Spanish wedding so we can hear all the differences 🥰
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified hahaha ill love it..
The cream puff tower you're describing sounds exactly like a croquembouche.
you don't invite everyone to do both in Belgium either. the first part is for immediate family and best friends. the evening is for family, friends, colleagues
beer to a wedding ?? it's the first time I hear that :O
Yes! Love beer at any event!
Do you have as much dishes in the US than in France at weddings ? My cousin married a Colombian and they mixed up the French and Colombian traditions at their wedding. There is no "vin d'honneur" in Colombian weddings and they usually eat a huge dish before partying all night. The cooks and reception staff tried to take up the challenge of "entrée-plat-dessert" but my cousin could not find a "pièce montée" so their decided to make it funny by having the bride and the groom distributing Colombian popsicles. Also in the Colombian familly, the Father made a speech that is all about how much he was proud of his daughter and loved her and was proud to give her to his son in law, while in my familly, the French, there was a video of the Grandma who could not come to Colombia oppening the wedding invitation, and there was a powerpoint made by the friends of the groom. Actually you don't have to be a "témoin" to create something for you friends weddings, so usually you group of friend make somthing up. It can be a song, a dance, a powerpoint, video montage, a play whatever... The objetive is to entertain and show the funny and more private side of the bride and groom
There are many non-drinking subgroups in America, sometimes no alcohol at weddings.
The civil union you’re referring to is called a common law marriage. It used to be after 8 years, a live in relationship was called common law. I don’t think any states recognize that anymore
Good to know! I thought it was still recognized!
HI! I loved to hear about this. Is there any way you can do a video about your wedding? Like was it I France, how did you invite people, what traditions did you stick with? I am soon planning to get married to my French man in a couple years, but I'm already stressing about the French-American wedding. Or is there any way I could contact you via email? I am very interested!
Great idea! I'll definitely add this to the list! Sure, you can always email me on unintentionallyfrenchified@gmail.com. 😄
Est ce que vous avez des "enfants d'honneur" aux US ? Ici ce sont de jeunes enfants qui généralement tiennent le voile de la mariée, apportent les alliances et jettent des pétales de fleurs à la sortie. Ils sont tous habillés pareil.
Les témoins en revanche n'ont pas ce rôle et n'ont pas toujours de tenues accordées (même si c'est de plus en plus courant)
Marie Bambelle oui!! On appelle ça « flower girls » and « ring bearers » ils sont trop adorable 🥰
That was really interesting !!! I knew some things thanks to american movies but didnt know everything! Yeah partial invitations can be hard to understand but it's bc marriage are really expensive (locations/castel rents cost a lot) and maybe ? (I dont know about this as Ive never been to an American wedding) bc there are so many people invited ? What would you say ? Reception are as big in France than in the US ? Is there the same number of people invited ?
Glad you liked it! I think the size of the wedding totally depends on the couple and of course how much money they want to spend. But you normally decide an amount of guests for the entire day and only committ to the amount the venue can hold and how much you can spend! Just a little different :)
Not true. In the US, you can invite more people to the church ceremony and then have fewer people at the reception..
You didn’t mention the dress code at French or US weddings and I was wondering if there is as big a difference between the two as there is between U.K. and US weddings. I once attended a wedding in England between an American and an English girl. All of the Americans who travelled over, wore evening wear, as in Tuxedos and long gowns, whilst the English people were all in daywear with the women wearing gorgeous hats. At the time I thought it was amusing, as if the Americans hadn’t got the memo. However I later moved to the US and discovered that evening wear is commonly worn at weddings, especially amongst close family. Is it daywear at French weddings too? British and Irish (I now live in Ireland) weddings usually resemble the dress codes you’d see at a royal wedding, just not as posh
This is a really good question! When i moved to France at 21, i wasn't attending a lot of weddings and now at 31, i think my style has become "frenchfied" enough that I fit right in. When i go back to the states for weddings I often wear the same thing I did in France, so i would say its pretty similar from my experience! We dont have the big hats like they do in England. Would be fun though!
I have a big question : I’m American and my fiancé is French. If we want to live in the U.S where do we have to get married first? We are so torn
Hi! My Frenchie and I are getting married next year, and this weekend we were all chatting and his mom said it was essential for the FIRST dance to be between her and my fiance and my father and me. She said that after this dance each parent hands us off to each other so opposite of the states... I was a bit shocked! Have you experienced this at a French wedding before?
Katie Jimenez hey Katie! I’ve never heard of that before! Either it’s not a well known tradition or maybe a belle mère who is a little sad to let go of her baby boy 😆
It's definitely a thing... Everyone in my family does this for the first dance of their wedding... And I did it too, I was very happy to share my first dance with my father. But in my family it's only about the bride : she is the first to dance with her father and then, the second dance is with her husband, the third one, everyone gets to dance...I guess every family has its own traditions...
I think that’s because both of them live in Paris, where there is a lot more money in general than in the rest of France.
By the way, you didn't mention anything about the gift-giving portion of French weddings. Is that similar - i.e., do they register somewhere - or more of a low-key thing? How does that work out. And, how is gift giving in other situations in France?
Good point! At every wedding i have been to, the bride and groom have a registry so you can either send something to their house or leave something at the wedding. It's also really common now to give money for the honeymoon too. It seems to be very similar with the US!
For info PACS doesn't give the same rights as marriage does. On the subject of expat, my partner is Italian and I'm French, we are "pacsé" but he didn't get citizenship. Which would be different if we got married he would become french.
Other than that the video is really cool and so true!
I’m from Utah and it’s super common to be invited to only half of a wedding/just the reception and not the ceremony 😂 But that’s because Mormon wedding practices have heavily influenced wedding culture in the area, even for non-Mormon weddings.
Cindy C thanks for the insights! I had know idea it was a common practice in the US too!
In France is very very very rude to only come to the reception and avoiding the wedding ceremony. Don’t ever do that in France. Everybody will avoid you the rest of your whole life, considering you as the rudest person.
Hi
Rules vary state by state in the US, but it is true that there is this thing called "common law marriage" in some states. If you have lived together continuously acting like man and wife for XX number of years [ whatever number of years is listed in the state law ] and you have acted exactly like a man and wife in public during all that time, you have entered a de facto state of marriage.
Sometimes it's five years and sometimes it's ten years.
Hi. Sorry (for my English, too), but Rosie and you seem to have the same problem : you generalize too much clichés. Yes, we have a lot of castles in France, but not "most of the people are getting married there", because it's expensive.
:-)
I completely agree that everyone isn't getting married in castles and it's definitely expensive to do it. But, on the other hand, NOONE is getting married in a castle in the USA, so even if you think it's a cliche, it's still happening in France and it's a big difference for us! :)
I think it depends on where you're living; by me there are a lot of castles that are not expensive, or maybe not castle as we call it as castles «de la loire» but there are a lot of pretty and old houses to rent for anything and everyone us getting married there. I think it really depends on the lpcation, but at least everyone dreams of a wedding in a castle
For me it was pretty accurate
When you live in the country it is more common to have the wedding party in castle (but a small one, more like the ones used as « maison d’hôtes ». But Also a lot of wedding parties take place in a « salle des fêtes »
I've been to only one wedding in a castle for about 5/6 in some "salles des fêtes" and yet I lived for 20 years in the villages of Champagne, where there are of course lots of castles like everywhere hidden in the country. Most of us can't afford a castle, it's really not that common, even when you live in a region full of them. The basic french wedding takes place like you said in the town hall to sign the papers and everything, then in the church, and finally everyone goes to the 'salle des fêtes' until the morning after.
like my country the best of both worlds: civil = american; religious = Spanish, ceremony
Unfortunately in the states the cohabitation laws vary by state- so in some states u may get the same rights as marriage after say 5 or 10 years...then theres states like California which have absolutely NO protection for cohabitation, even after a lifetime.
the PACS is not legally exactly the same as a marriage. PACS is like a Domestic Partner agreement. With a PACS, there is no need for a divorce, you just fill out a form to say you are finished. With PACS there are no inheritance/financial rights if one partner dies, custody rights are limited. As with Domestic Partner agreements, they can file joint tax returns and have their relationship socially recognized. However, if you move out of France, your PACS will not be recognized and you will be classified as single.
Bạn này chia sẻ hay quá, chúc mừng nhé.
In fact, the french PACS was created for couples of the same sex. I did not know that it was an option for heterosexual couples.
So if you have a "PACs " are you considered a civil union?
and what documents do you need to have for a real actual French marriage just have a officient sign the certificate and nothing else no going to sign at the court etc?
I'm not the best person to answer for the civil union pacs because it seems to be mroe diffrent than i previuosly thought. You need lots of documents to get married or PACS in france! You have to send your documents for mariage in france to the town hall or drop it off and as a foreigner, i took three plus months to collect everything i needed like birth certificates, rental agreements, documents proving you aren't already married etc....
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified wow! So much, great video!
Actually, in France most of the receptions are at the parents' or any relatives' house, very few weddings are in castles, and it's people who can afford to rent it.
Of course, it's expensive to get marreid in a castle. But in the USA, it's not even a possibility.
Actually, many people save a lot of money for a long time to be able to do that. It's pretty common and not rare at all, but of course it's not every couple! Just recently, two of my friends who earn only around 2000euros/month each did that.
I have never seen a wedding taking place in the actual parents' or relatives' house. It's more often, a little castle, a "maison d'hote" with a beautiful old barn renovated, or in a salle des fêtes.
@@lenam2946 Well, not everybody can afford renting a castle or a big house. Sometimes the wedding meal is in a "salle des fêtes", it's true, but the rest of the day isn't.
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified Peoplefromusa who had the money,go to Europeto find the castle to get married
Do you have your wedding video to share, to demonstrate the differences?
We actually didn't end up doing a wedding video, but i do have some photos up on my instagram account (instagram.com/unintentionally_frenchified/) and some on the blog here (unintentionallyfrenchified.com/2019/02/21/did-you-know-these-9-differences-between-french-and-american-weddings/)!!
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified Thanks for the links. How long have you been married? Is your mari faithful? Sorry if this offends you. But many people say French guys cheat. They love to flirt around. So wonder if you also notice that while you are in France? It'll be interesting if you can talk about this. 😊
je suis française et ayant regardé ta vidéo je trouve que tu généralise beaucoup:
Chez moi on fait les mariages sur une journée ( nous avons donc deux repas un jour + le lendemain ce qu'on appel le "retour de noce" donc trois repas) donc à ce prix là évidemment on ne se paie pas de château pour notre mariage et on ne peut effectivement pas inviter tout le monde toute la journée. et nous ne buvons pas obligatoirement de champagne : mon frère s'est marié en Novembre dernier et il n'y a pas eu de champagne du tout. Du bon vin oui c'est sûr. de la bière aussi.
je trouve que beaucoup de gens qui se trompent en pensant que le champagne est un produit luxueux alors qu'il existe de très mauvais champagnes et de très bons vins meilleurs que des champagnes....
Hi Clemence, j'adore l’idée d'avoir seulement du vin et de la bière. C'est plutôt comme mon mariage aux etats unis! En revanche, je n'ai jamais vu ça en France donc je peux que parler de ce que je suis vécue. Et je comprends qu'un mariage est très cher, donc difficile de payer 3 repas pour tout le monde. Mais d'ou je viens, tu décides plutôt de ne pas inviter quelqu'un que au lieu de leur dire qu'il peut rester seulement une partie de la journée... c'est juste différente pour moi.
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified en fait c'est pas que ça : au mariage tu invite aussi les amis de tes parents qui ne sont donc pas tes amis... donc tu ne peux pas les inviter toutes la journée.... j'avoue que je préfère carrément faire comme ça parce-que y a des gens que tu ne peux pas, ne pas inviter et pour autant tu n'est pas assez intime avec eux pour qu'ils partagent toute la journée du mariage. ça permet aussi je pense d'inviter plus de gens différents.. effectivement tu ne peux parler que de ce que tu connais mais c'est dommage du publier un contenu que tu ne maîtrise pas parce-que je suis désolé mais tu véhicule des informations qui sont fausses et que je trouve pas très flatteuses pour nous...
En dessert , j'ai eu l'occasion de voir une pièce montée représentant une moto , c'était pour des amis bikers .
Did you do two ceremonies, one here and one in the U.S.?
Darby Terpstra yes! We did the mariage civil in France which was smaller and then a bigger non religious ceremony and reception three months later in the US! 😻
je me suis marié, il y a 3 ans et le mariage que tu présentes n'est pas le même suivant les régions en France et le budget.
Pour notre mariage avec un budget plus restreint (12000€ environ) pas de chateau mais une salle des fêtes avec un parc champêtre, on prépare le mariage 1 an et demi à l'avance, on réserve la salle puis la mairie et le traiteur. On a fabriqué une partie de notre décoration avec de la récupération ou des achats dans des vides grenier pour des vases ou pot en verre (notre thème c'était champêtre chic) avec du lin, dentelle et du rose pastel. on a décoré la salle avec la famille, les amis, la veille.
On ce prépare tôt, la mariée va en générale à 7h ou 7h30 du matin au coiffeur puis au maquillage et après elle mets sa robe de mariée.
On ce retrouve devant la mairie vers 10 ou 11h, il y a l'acte civil puis on a fait une cérémonie laïque dans le parc (que nous avons aussi organisé, nous n'avons rien demandé aux témoins, sauf l'enterrement de vie de garçon et de fille), c'est une amie qui avait le rôle d'officiant.
Puis on fait le vin d'honneur (kir, rosé et sans alcool, avec du sucré et du salé) et on fait des photos aussi pendant le vin d'honneur, cela dure environ 2h 2h30. puis on passe à table avec un petit verre pour commencer, après c'est en général une entrée(nous c'était foie gras), un poisson (nous c'était brochette de gambas et st jacques au basilic thaï ùmais traditionnellement c'est un sandre au beurre blanc) puis nous avons un trou normand (une glace avec de l'alcool fort pour digérer) puis une viande (nous c'était un filet mignon avec légumes et gratin dauphinois) , un plateau de fromage et le dessert, le tout est servi par du vin (moelleux, vin blanc, vin rouge et pétillant) qui sont servi par des tireurs à boire. Il y a plusieurs animations pendant le repas (chanson, vidéo, powerpoint, jeux, sketchs) on a finis le repas vers 20h, on prend un café, on ce détend (souvent on fait des partie de palets, pétanque etc.)
On a commencé le bal à 21h pour le finir vers 5h30. Pendant le bal, on aussi d'autres animations (la danse du parapluie, la danse de la brioche typique de chez nous, on a une très grande brioche et les mariés doivent la porter sur un plateau et les gens doivent passer par en dessous, et on mange la brioche après) puis on a plus tard la soupe à l'oignon (normalement les invités doivent réveillé les mariés et apportent la soupe à l'oignon dans la nuit)
Le lendemain, on fait un retour, un apéritif (normal) après nous c'était un buffet froid, des animations puis on range la salle.
j'ai plusieurs mariage et jamais dans un château, c'est souvent des salles des fêtes ou une salle chez un vignerons et j'ai rarement bu du champagne, c'est souvent du crémant.
Avec ceux qui ont participé à des mariages dans des châteaux, il reviennent souvent déçu car c'est souvent ennuyeux et long. Souvent on préfère éviter les mariages dans des endroits très chic car on le sait à l'avance que l'on va s'ennuyer.
Interesting to hear the differences between French & US weddings. In the UK with regards to inviting people to the wedding, it's the other way around.
The couple tend to invite less people to the actual marriage ceremony / post ceremony drinks & dinner (called the Wedding Breakfast).
Then they invite more people (that didn't come to the ceremony/dinner earlier that day) to the evening reception which tends to start around 7pm. Which is where the first dance happens, maybe a buffet/canapés around 8/9pm & all the partying!
I am a single young man, I am 37 years old, from Egypt, looking for marriage and stability
when did you got married?
Pillecukor Ka in May and September 2017! Almost two years ago now 🥰
Congrats! I like your videos! I live in Eastern Europe now and I guess we just get married way younger. We have the same thing with the civil marriage and the religious ceremony. But we only had a courthouse ceremony; many people do it this way. I have a different religion as my husband and was not willing to give up mine and convert to his just to be able to get married in a church, as it was required. I am Hungarian and have nothing to do with the orthodox church, he is not religious either, so that was it. We had a small ceremony and it was lovley. On the 26 th of February we’ll be celebrating 4 years.
Pillecukor Ka congrats on 4 years! Sounds like you guys did what was absolutely perfect for you! 😻
@@pillecukorka2862 congrats to you,this days people are more focuse in the wedding ceremonies than the real marriage,i know people who had big weddings and smal marriages,too bad
What about the singing?
Journal le Monde "Près d’un million de couples se forment chaque année dont plus de la moitié en union libre, soit davantage que le nombre de mariages et de pacs réunis."So wedding and PACS are less popular than free union.
I thought that dessert is a croquembuche
hello there
Since it's not mentioned in the video, I'm going to assume that fist fights between drunk family members degenerating in all out war is a staple of marriages in both countries :p
hahah i think that can happen anywhere 😂
😎
It's important to note that for same-sex couples or opposite sex couples who adopt, they have to get married for both parents to have equal rights. Whereas opposite sex couples who have biological couples can simply put the name of the father on the birth certificate, an unmarried woman who is not the biological mother of her partner's child can't put her name on the birth certificate and couples are allowed to adopt together if they're unmarried.
It's pretty unfair that opposite sex couples get to benefit from the flexibility of PACS while starting a family but opposite couples have to get married.
Il y a beaucoup de différences entre le mariage et le PACS. Le PACS est une ébauche d'organisation patrimoniale qui vous donne des avantages en matière fiscale mais on est très loin du degré de protection que le mariage offre en matière de droit civil. Juste à titre de comparaison entre le mariage, le divorce, les successions, il doit y avoir plus de 250 articles du code civil qui traitent du mariage et de ses effets. Alors que pour le PACS, il n'y a pas plus de 10 articles dans le code civil. Bonne continuation.
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified Pas de soucis. Je faisais cette précision car beaucoup de français font également ce raccourcis. Le PACS est très pratique dans la vie quotidienne et d'un point de vue fiscal. Il peut être protecteur pour le partenaire à beaucoup d'égards (sécurité sociale, droit au bail, ...). Mais étrangers ou français, n'hésitez pas à vous renseigner chez un notaire français à ce sujet. Par exemple, pour que le PACS soit protecteur pour votre partenaire en cas de succession, il faut faire un testament. By the way, keep going, I like your videos.
lebourse noted!! Glad you like the videos 😁
Hi, I am from France and i've been to a couple weddings in Montreal,Canada and It's very similar to what you just said about the US weddings. Another thing that shocked me is that all the weddings i've been to were in summer, and both were in a reception closed, no access to the outside with like a nice yard for the kids to play or things like that. Everybody is inside with the AC. I've been disappointed with that. I don't know if it's also the case in the US.
Lauragueen hi Laura! Most weddings I’ve been to in the summer are outside in the US too. But it’s true we have lots of indoor weddings and I would assume with the cold in Canada you might see that even more?!
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified Yes, I'd assume the cold has to be a big reason (you see more summer weddings in the northern US). In the South of the US, as I'm sure you know, Summer weddings happen, but I'd say Fall and Spring are much more common for heat reasons. An outdoor Summer wedding in the south is a recipe for disaster w/ the older folks. I'm actually not even sure I've been to a southern summer wedding now that I think about it--though I'm sure they are common, particularly on the beach.
My (French) wedding was a civilian one.
I remember the mayor, who was our marriage official, giving us a speech no one had asked for, and punctuating it with the lamest music, that no one but him had ever heard, or liked.
Then began the motorcade towards the party hall, my aunt took my mother in her car, I was with my wife in her father’s high end Mercedes.
My aunt was right behind us in the parking lot.
We turned left.
She turned right.
EVERYBODY FOLLOWED HER CAR.
My wife burnt me for the whole ride :”your family is a bunch of punks”.
Not the best way to start a couple😁
the way I figure it is if you live with them your married !
What a mess! We went to the city hall with the witnesses, signed the documents and got back to home. And that's all. We just did not see any meaning in spending money and time for a party.
That's perfect if that's what you wanted and you didn't see any point in spending money! It's exactly how my husband felt too!
Ok I'm here cause I read a fanfic of a french cartoon couple or anAU not sure what it's called but anyways I'm here cause I want to write one but I sign wanna offend anyone.
"Anyone"... elle a du passer un test, donc c'est pas "anyone"...
The wedding witnesses... one for the maid, one for the groom... have a huge responsability, the youth life burial (ehm, not sure if I can translate it like that) where the to be married must follow without knowing what will happen....They are the organisator of that famous last day of freedom.
Too bad you didn't mention the garter auction.... higher is the auction, higher the bride must wear the garter... Though, I'm not sure, maybe it's same tradition with US wedding?
and the chamber pot? ugggh
Stéphanie Marchino Enterrement de vie de jeune fille/garçon se traduit bien mais par « Bachelor Party » :)
Very true! They do organize the bachelor/bachelorette party and its a HUGE responsibility for some people!
Vaelios3292 Enterrement de jeune fille is a hen party
Oops - sorry! I’m not burying the girl! Enterrement de vie de . . .
I’m French and I don’t understand this tradition of inviting people to a part of the wedding. You can even invite to the cocktail & the cake... I mean like people leave the wedding and come back a couple of hours later.
Chawiland good to know you don’t get it either! It’s such a bizarre concept for foreigners!
Souvent, pour le vin d'honneur, on invite nos contacts professionnels et/ou personnes qui ne sont pas des "proches" :)
Sérieuse Fantaisie oui, c’est très différent pour moi!
@@UnintentionallyFrenchified je comprends. Ce n'est même pas évident pour nous xD Bonne continuation et vivement tes prochaines vidéos 😁
A wedding is a public ceremony in France, so in theory every human being on earth could come and assist to the ceremony.
The "vin d'honneur" is generally held just after the ceremony and is often also relatively open. For example if I am (fully) invited to a wedding I would expect to be allowed to come with a friend for the "vin d'honneur". Most people in a small village are more or less explicitly invited, colleagues are often invited too, the mayor who presided the ceremony, etc.
On the other hand the dinner/party afterward is for far fewer people. I would expect everyone to know well one of the newlyweds or at least one of the two families.
I have never seen someone only invited to the "vin d'honneur" and the cake. However I have seen people which where invited to everything but were too busy and end up only coming to part. For example someone came to the vin d'honneur for a few minutes, then came back later just in time for the cake.
le pacs ne donne pas les mêmes droit que le mariage , en cas de décés , on perd tout ou presque
Being only pacsed, you can't inherit after your partner and you cannot take their family name as yours. If it was exactly the same, the two things wouldn't exist I guess. One would be enough.