5% Of People Are Sociopaths - Here’s What You Need To Know
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- Опубликовано: 18 май 2024
- Sociopathy is a spectrum. It’s a disorder that affects roughly 5% of the population - similar to the number of people who have depression or anxiety. Patric Gagne is a sociopath.
In this chat with Fearne, Patric explains the difference between a psychopath and a sociopath. Sociopaths have access to inherent emotions like sadness and happiness, but struggle with learned social emotions like remorse, guilt, empathy, and love. There’s also a huge feeling of apathy for Patric, which in the past led her to anti-social behaviours like stealing cars and breaking into houses.
Fearne also points out the benefits of not caring what others think of you; while she people pleases a lot, she can see the freedom in having a lack of a filter. They chat about how to function in a relationship when you have to communicate any kind of mental disorder or illness too.
Patric’s memoir, Sociopath, is this month’s Happy Place Book Club read. Come and be part of the Book Club discussions on Instagram @happyplacebookclub.
Sociopath is out now.
Listen to Book Club Meets: Jo Cheetham
Listen to Book Club Meets: Jennie Godfrey
Thanks to Bluebird (an imprint of Pan Macmillan) for the Sociopath audiobook extract.
ABOUT FEARNE COTTON
Fearne Cotton is an English television and radio presenter, mother, broadcaster, writer and founder of Happy Place, a place where Fearne holds difficult but important conversations to encourage self-care and self-appreciation, creating a positive impact on the world, giving everyone a voice and actively listening.
CONNECT WITH FEARNE COTTON
Instagram: / fearnecotton
Facebook: / fearnecotton
Twitter: / fearnecotton
#FearneCotton €#HappyPlace #PatricGagne 
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This is the art of manipulation. You will be told what is in their interests and how they want you to believe. Everything is a calculation of their self interests.
If you're going to be closed minded and biased, I don't understand what's the point in watching the vid and commenting something so useless.
you DO realize you are literally straw-maning and gaslighting her, right? Like this is witch hunt level argumentation...
I also love how you make everyone with ASPD out how to be this Moriarty-esque mastermind.
You really have the mind of child...
My mother is a sociopath. They ARE monsters. Not all are violent, in fact, i think the non-violent ones may be more dangerous in a way. Because theyre highly unlikely to ever be stopped if the things they do aren't easily identified, the way violence would be. My mother ruins anyone's life she is allowed into. And has been allowed to do this, her entire life.
my mother too😢
I’m betting this woman is also 1000% a bonafied narcissist too.
All people w ASPD are narcassists
Anti-social (sociopathy) is in the same category as narcissism, they are both personality disorders, meaning they are cemented into the personality, into who that person is. Although they have different names, narcissism and sociopathy as well as histrionic etc, they all blend a bit together. It’s not like they are separate. So yes, naturally, by way of having a personality disorder, there would be narcissistic traits as well as sociopathic.
Her real name is Patricia Cagle and her PhD credentials are dubious.
Lol it would be kinda disappointing if they weren't...dubious... ya know?
Thank you
I'll look that up. Thank you
Maybe you are a fraud. Can't even spell her name properly.
My step son was Conduct Disorder, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, then after 18 Antisocial Sociopath. He is the most dangerous person I know and he has stolen from me since he was 7 and he is 36 now. He kicked my dog the day I brought her home from being spayed when he was 7. He went to prison for 2 years at 18 for assaulting me and family violence. He shot his own dog in the head as adult. I have seen him beat a grown man until he was bleeding out of his ears and the man's brain was hemorrhaging. He is more manipulative today than he was a child. Sociopaths are not to be trusted.
Scary
Wow that is disturbing. I pray Jesus saves him
Wow that is disturbing. I pray Jesus saves him
If you listened to her you'd have heard that she's not on about those extreme cases of sociopathy like your stepson. There's a spectrum and those that live with sociopathy and aren't violent should have access to treatment. I'm so sorry you went through what you did. I can't imagine the pain & trauma you must've gone through 🫂
@karinamurison1537 Yes, you're right, but if you know what the criteria is having to meet that you have to do some pretty heinous things. So either she's not being honest with us. Or maybe she's just in my opinion. Might meet sociopathic tendencies without meeting the full diagnosis. But if she gets really honest about her conduct disorder I could probably believe Her diagnosis, but I know a lot of people who break into homes who aren't diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder and wouldn't fit the full criteria.
🤔😏Notice how she said she attacked a child, she got a shocked reaction from the interviewer then tamed it by saying she took the barrette out of the girl's hair in front of her, then the interviewer calmed and they moved on to the next point. Sociopaths will say or do little awkward things that make you feel uncomfortable hours or days later. Lots of eyebrow raising moments but not too many that will make you run screaming in the opposite direction, unless you're an empath, very sensitive person, or a narcissistic abuse survivor.
Yes and they'll pick someone weak to torture. Like that barrettes pull? Maybe there was a little clump of hair in there. Oops! Crying little girl runs for help and socio laughs and says it was an accident. There was some fuzz in barrettes girl's hair! Barrettes girl is exaggerating!
Yeah, she's very sly and sneaky and knows what she's doing. And it's all so funny to her. Give them their own city to live in
@@muma6559 we need education and awareness. if everyone knew we could protect each other better. and all healthy people need to realize that gossip is always toxic and it's how these socios get away with a lot: by ruining other's reps. don't tolerate it in the workplace.
I sensed she was toning down a lot of the questionable things she did
@@lilij1915 yeah she/he was minimizing her/his criminal behavior. Did you notice she/he was called Patrick at the end ?
My first husband was diagnosed with ASPD and NPD, and let me just say that being his wife or his child was to be in a relationship of inevitable harm. I do not want anyone watching this to think people can be as "normal" as this woman, and actual sociopaths are everything a parent should never be. I can't believe that she chose to have children knowing she was antisocial . I bought the book, and I look forward to reading it, but I have very mixed feelings about this and mostly I worry about the false hope this will create in empathic people. What she said around 34:32 about seeing pain in someone else's face, I very much doubt this diagnosis. She sounds more like she thinks like a lot of neuro typical men. It is uncommon for a female to be that emotionally detached, but we don't need to lose the stigma because these people destroy lives. Again, not this woman, but sociopaths are mostly not anything like this woman. Also, my ex did make choices and his behavior was calculated and deliberate and he was a master manipulator, handsome and charismatic and wearing a mask always except for behind closed doors where he was terrorizing me and our children. .
I totally agree with you on this
I agree with you. People need to be aware of how deceitful superficial charm is, how it is used as a manipulation tactic to get you just where they want you to be, and how it’s always self serving.
Don’t put your gard down people, they can sniff it out like a shark and will take advantage of the opportunity at your expense.
Also remember, all sociopaths are narcissists (but not all narcissists arre sociopaths.) She’s most certainly doing this for, at least, narcissistic supply. She’s gotten skilled at her game, mimicking other people’s behaviour to fool people behind her mask. She knows how to play on other people’s empathy to get what she wants. I see all the tricks she’s playing here.
Furthermore, you don’t have to be a murderer (or in prison) to wreak havoc in someone’s life, do serious damage or severely hurt someone. I mean, that is the bar she sets for not being a dangerous/bad person? Says all we need to know, really.
@@mnemetotoro I 100% agree with you. She's getting narc supply as she speaks about herself and sociopathy and how wonderful, freeing it is to be one
Actually it makes perfect sense that a sociopath would have children despite knowing they have a harmful antisocial personality disorder. That seems pretty textbook to do something selfish to benefit oneself without considering the detrimental harm it will have on others who are extremely vulnerable and will be directly negatively impacted by their self centered decision.
I can totally see how you'd be hesitant, as I also think her talking about herself is exactly what she'd want. However do know your ex husband was one case and not every case. She seems really nice to me, so I think she's right in saying it's a spectrum and they can learn and not all of them become violent. It's also very interesting to hear her perspective and how she feels. I'm sorry you went through what you did.❤
This interview is dangerously riding the line of normalizing and even glorifying not having the burden of empathy and emotions.
Not having empathy. Sociopath do have emotions.
Only people with a lack of comprehension or common sense would see this as glorifying a mental disorder.
Lack of empathy though leaves a huge handicap..
so RIGHT on you are here! I study psychology and in so many vids online I see this too - they are always saying it's not bad to be like this as a way of comforting the mentally unbalanced person and then celebs are also making it chic and cool to be ment ill - like how bipolar and BPD have esp gotten to be super popular and normalized.
This is def an agenda on a higher power level by the elites who run the system b/c they want to make us sick and create chaos so they can get us
1) under their control to be vulnerable to their agendas so they can play the 'hero' act
and 2) to make huge profit.
They've done this forever - you see it in physical health first and how Big Pharma preys on us w/ their relationship w/the FDA to put junk in the food to make us sick to drive profit to the pharmacy and dr's. Insurance scams galore and all of that, etc.....
@annaburson1 If you watch her other videos she speaks the exact opposite of what your saying. She does everything within her abilities and tells others to do the same to tap into what feeling of empathy she may have in one area and cultivate it in other areas and excepting and taking responsibility for her disability
I would like to hear a little more about some things she’s done - like she briefly mentioned she likes to follow people as well as breaking into a strangers home- because it’s true that we live in a world were many people have higher than average traits of psychopathy (secondary & primary) and the presentation isn’t what one would think. It’s not a rare condition as most people are taught to believe. If we calculated more honestly the percentage is 30% of our population. That doesn’t include the more mildly toxic individuals. When you realize this it really changes how you understand your relationships and environment. I test 0 on the PCLR and I am a target for manipulative people. I’m far from naive but I have been at war to remove a few individuals who have wanted to hurt me.
Did she used to become rageful if she felt someone was going to expose her disorder??
Wait, socio/psychopaths make up 30% of the population?!
I agree, I wish she would elaborate a little more on the examples of her strange behavior.. the interviewer should have probed a little more
I read the book; she is a monster
I feel like most management and landlords that I have dealt with are sociopaths
Brutal honesty is 1000 times better than sweet lies!
Thank you, at least someone on the comment section has some brains.
Egoism isn't
Said the sociopath, an individual notoriously well known for charismatic lies and manipulation.
From my understanding, her laughter and smiling are part of her mask to make the other person feel at ease with them.
Agree the eyes stay cold!
@@tathe3786I noticed that…not saying she cant choose to be a decent human being.
Exactly. Duping delight.
The eyes are dark and dead - they called it a sociopathic stare
She reminds me so much of a bully from school.. all makes sense to me now
Oh this interviewer!! 🤦🏼♀️ “Oh how freeing it must be to not care about your fellow humans!! I just care so much about how what I do affects others! Your way of thinking just makes so much sense!” 😳
Gross huh?! 🤢
Disgusting isn't it. 😢
I feel like I need to take a bath and burn my clothes. Giving a platform to a person like this is dangerous.
Hahahaha!!!!! You nailed it!!!! Imagine not feeling guilty or bad for hurting other people's feelings???
Never to be scared of doing bad things like being cruel or violent or breaking into houses.....
@@TuxieTude It's revolting!
I'm related to a an entire family of dark entities. I've also been affected by them at work. I honestly don't believe that sociopaths are only 5%. The percentage in the corporate jobs I worked was much much higher.
It is now clear that a lot of people in our community are emotionless. They have advantage over others. Healthy people must learn to identify them for our own safety.
Yes some people are emotionaless but these people are not emotionless, they are empathyless
Extremely well put
You're not smart enough to catch it trust me, I'm diagnosed ASPD and my own mother still doesn't know I'm a sociopath. You just can't tell who's a sociopath lol we'll sit there and talk about narcissistic and sociopaths and how terrible and two faced those people are all the while we are one 😅
Got news for you. Some of the people you believe are healthy are sociopaths because believe it or not, sociopaths can be healthy too.
@@user-rh9jg9fu7z They are emotionless in the sense of "emotionally blind" like how someone is color blind.
Main emotions they lack or hardly feel: sadness, embarrassment, anxiety, fear, true joy, etc.
Emotions they feel a lot: anger, contempt, satisfaction or duper delight, etc.
sociopath or psychopath is basically being color blind, but for emotions. that's what aspd is.
Most aspd also have the emotional maturity of a child.
I've seen many a psychopath talk themselves out of trouble like a 6 year old denying they took their friend's toy (you know they did).
First of all…way too many ads. Secondly sociopaths live “normal” lives because they manipulate and abuse vulnerable people, empaths without boundaries, people pleasers etc. Third this woman should not be allowed to be a one on one therapist. She already admitted that she knows how to blend in. Fourthly her upbringing is clearly why she is the way she is and that was completely left out of the conversation. Lastly there is “stigma” because it has been rightly earned! & saying there is so much stigma is invalidating the victims of their abuse! I do not trust this woman for a second, anyone can perform for an interview, what do her children think, what do they neighbours know? The people closest to them are the ones with all the insight, not a performance for society!
@@AK-bx3ft nah, the stigma is well deserved, spectrum or not, nothing to do with OP's ego
I'm pretty sure sociopaths are evil and just because they're a surgeon doesn't change that. I said what I said. I don't care what anyone thinks of what I said either. You're free to have you're own opinion.
I've been to social personality disorder. And I'd say don't trust. Us. I'm probably the only sociopath. If you want to call me that there will be honest with could care less about stigma because I could care less about what people think of me. The only time I could ever care and I'm only gonna say this once is if my bridges were burned. These people who come on here and say they have this disorder and want to end the stigma. Do not have this disorder.
Agree 👍 my gut told me exact the same thing you wrote
I was thinking the exact same thing…anyone can put on an act for an interview and she said herself that she knows how to adapt to situations. That’s the problem with people like this (psychopaths, sociopaths and people with NPD). They lie so much that they don’t even know when they’re doing it anymore. Their reality is beyond skewed. Even if you DID find one that wasn’t trying to manipulate you, you’re never going to get any takeaway from talking to them.
She could’ve gone to nature for stillness. She derived a sense of power from violating people’s personal space. it’s about violating boundaries- entitlement to power over others. Feelings for themselves and for what they want but not for others.
Embodied cognition/linguistics (book: Metaphors We Live By) show the ways we think and speak are connected to emotions and physiology. I think it’s very worth continued studying what is nature and nurture as there are already studies showing nurture is a big part (war torn countries have more sociopaths.) Essentially it seems love for others is perceived as a vulnerability when young and so the embodied emotions/loving thinking is not practiced/wired in. These internal maladaptive protections have some baring in truth-feeling for others CAN be a vulnerability because those feelings can be manipulated until you learn how to avoid/understand people who do that. & Unfortunately, so much of psychology is weaponized by the disordered in power for their own aims, not for the benefit of humanity. Nothing is or has ever been left on the table that can be used for the furtherance of wealth and power.
Or maybe the only thing left on the table is that to gain wealth one must be willing to violate
I think the bad tendencies are a response to rejection bc they obv don't feel like they fit in and that's a feeling of rejection.
Spot on. I thought the same...There are plenty of places where one can find calmness and quiet without breaking into houses. It doesn't wash.
A distinction she left out is that personality disorder is not a mental illness. It’s the way your particular personality style evolved over time given your genetic heritable traits coinciding with your environment. The do know right from wrong and are not out of control. The prognosis for this personality disorder is poor.
Yes but legally a bit different in different countries...for example, Personality Disorders became recognised under The Mental Health act (in Scotland) in order that people could be offered treatment...including Personality Disorders under the umbrella of Mental Illness/Health opened doors that were previously closed.
So if you have multiple personality disorders?
Then by your definition, being a psychopath isn’t a personality disorder, like being a sociopath is, because psychopaths are born with different brains. This lady may be a psychopath, not a sociopath.
@@AK-bx3ftseems accurate!
I have had close relationships with BOTH!
The sociopath is BY FAR much easier to “be friends” with…for a while..and yes…they are EMOTIONAL and can be a LOT of fun!! They can SOMETIMES feel empathy…
I disagree. It began with the sociopaths lie that a sociopath is a “milder” form of psychopath.
A sociopath lies to you on this video about how sociopaths can change and psychopaths cannot.. and you believe it?
Very rarely do these people change, from either category. Psychopaths can be “self aware” even though the sociopath in this video claims differently.
This video is excellent example of the behavior.
Don't care about her. Don't care about her niche marketing.
Spend resources on educating potential victims and victims on how to detect and avoid the wolf. Educate people on boundaries. Sharing is not caring with a wolf
I agree. All start as school bullies then somehow fit into society, workplace bully or end up in prison. Using "illness" as an excuse when it hurts others, animals, innocents, I don't care about you. OCD as Fearne mentioned, is a completely different outlet, mostly harming the one suffering with the illness not others. If anything this is worse as it goes under the radar, atleast with pyschopath's they are helped / dealt with approriately.
Don't watch then. It's that simple. You have no right to speak if you want to silence someone else based on your ignorance of the disorder.
It's about her book and getting more sales...bottom line..but so what really? Even Neuro typical people are selfish and callous with a general disregard for anyone unless it's close family ..or they identity with the person,or they need the person..
@@emilyau8023 Oh yes, lemme guess, next we need to have empathy for the sociopath bc they are simply "NEurOdIvERgenT".....🤡
@@emilyau8023 au contraire- many naive ppl can learn self defence if theyre wise to coniving behaviour.
As a psychologist whoever said a personality disorder is not a mental illness is totally wrong. Antisocial personality is a mental illness where one feels empty and needs drama to feel something.
A PD is different from a mental illness
Where did you graduate?
Not all psychologists are right. Just like there are amazing auto mechanics. And garbage ones. I could go on and on and on.
Are you saying sharks have a mental illness because they’re not “nice” like dolphins?
@@AnnaMishel Hope you truly are not this low of an IQ.
The percentages are way off in society. First, 30% of our young girls are depressed. Second, statistically as she stated it’s on those in prison. Most never get diagnosed because they don’t go to counseling or a Dr for symptoms. They’re just skirting around us in society.
So many questions I wished the interviewer asked! WHEN did she start stealing cars and breaking into homes? How did she pick the home and how did she get in? How did she never get caught? Were they homes of people she knew or strangers' homes? What would she do with the cars she stole? So many questions unasked...
Exactly. Very disappointing!
Yeah let's just skate passed that and keep it positive
Read the book..it is horrifying
What's the point in comparing the stats to someone who has depression etc. Not linked. The attempt to reframe what is essentially psychopathy as some kind of "disorder" deserving of some kind of compassion is dangerous. Sociopaths, admittedly through no fault of their own, are highly manipulative, empathy-devoid, selfish and capable of callous and deviant behaviours. You don't want to have a connection with a sociopath - they will cause you harm. I'm tired of these reframes - they almost slot into the frenetic end of woke culture that's causing so much harm generally. If someone tells you they're a sociopath disengage and cut the contact. Period.
Yes, I agree 💯. Great comment!!
“psychopathy” is antisocial personality disorder in the dsm-5.
Says a neurotypical
She is very dubious. As are some of her claims and credentials.
She seems like a narcissitic grifter if anything.
100%
All sociopaths & psychopaths are narcissists (but not all narcissists are socio-/psychopaths.)
@@mnemetotoro wrong
Yeah there is something about her I don't totally believe. It's like a inverse version of people today becoming obsessed with how special and unique they are because of their problems and fetishizing their diagnosis.
@@dreamingangeltarot2919Yes!!
@@ofliliesandremains.Um, no... absolutely correct by definition. all people with ASPD are narcissists. Not all narcissists have aspd.
There IS a singularly evil aspect to people who don’t experience developed empathy. If someone doesn’t have social emotions and feels a NEED to be antisocial to reduce internal tension: they WILL hurt others. And they will NOT seek help.
Well that's just factually not true.
@@AK-bx3ft it is a fact. If you don’t have developed empathy and feel a NEED to be antisocial to reduce tension: you WILL hurt people. It’s a fact. Because you don’t care and need to be antisocial. Fact.
@@MellowBellow1people may, for whatever reason, want to look as if they want help. Or the manipulation is better if seen by others an effort to seek help
@@user-rh9jg9fu7z do you mean sociopaths when you say people? Sociopaths may well superficially present flippantly as wanting help. Yes. They may also want help, but not feel empathy anyway, so cannot “learn” to feel empathy.
@@MellowBellow1 heh, yep
This is a sociopath - how are we supposed to believe anything she says or writes???
🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
And she is authoritarian about sociopathy
How can you believe anything someone says, then??
@@brugueshj559 trust NO ONE EVER
@@brugueshj559 90% of the ppl are not sociopath nor narc... so there is no lack of moral compass. that's why it's important to know how to identify those who don't have it.
Why are we trying to reduce the stigma of an antisocial personality disorder that is literally named antisocial because these people will hurt you without a care.
There are so few people with these types of personality disorders that will ever be self-aware enough to care enough to normalize their behaviors. It is not a safe message to tell us to normalize their disorder.
Agree
Of course we want to be seen to give each other a chance
Why you wanna normalize other disorders but not this one?? We don't choose to be this way and stigmatizing it and not giving treatment it's ultimately bad for us and for all the people around us. Hipocrite
Stigma stays. And we get to notice bad behaviour more quickly.
I wish the interviewer had challenged Patric's lack of accountability for her actions instead of gushingly empathizing with her. Patric laughs when she says something that she doesn't want challenged, and the interviewer unthinkingly laughs along with her. She is being conditioned by her interviewee, so this isn't a very valuable interview, and it's painful to watch as someone who lived with one of these people for decades. I'd like some real answers as to why my sociopath does what he does, and I am not getting them from him because he is a pathological liar with an airtight public persona of being this wonderful person who helps everyone. I see this in Patric, as well. Like me as I am, because I can't help being abusive and creepily invading people's boundaries, and couldn't possibly take responsibility for my actions like every other adult on the planet does. I am also so frustrated with the psychology community. The DSM is utterly no help, and this Patric woman has a psychology license when she has no emotional empathy for anyone? You might better be treated by utilizing an AI program.
Thank you for mentioning this.
What an enlightening interview, one of the best I have seen on RUclips! Thank you very much for sharing!
What gaslighting too😂
But sociopaths care enough about what others think to hide.
My take on it is, they can care plenty enough about themselves and if they did certain things, they would be socially outcast. But they care little to none about others feelings whether it’s how their own actions affect others or how someine else’s actions affects others - it’s very superficial.
They care about what others think about them only insofar as it affects their ability to get what they want or need from others.
It depends, some of us are quite friendly and nice people and don't want to hurt anyone. Speaking for myself, I only take part in society because I have children and I don't want to be in prison and be away from my children or put them in harms way.
My actions always take in to count my children. If my actions could hurt my children in any way I will not perform thjose actions.
It’s manipulation. My ex tried to be normal in public. But was a horrible abuser behind closed doors. A liar, a thief, an animal abuser. Tried to unalive me and other girlfriends. Did prison time and still insists he never hurt anyone? An awful control freak and the list goes on. But they have to try to pretend they are normal in public to blend in. Stay away from them at all costs. He never believed he needed professional help. Nothing you can do to help them so avoid them at all costs. Once you know, run away and never look back. I had to get a restraining order.
@@cassandracross-soto4133 oh i am so not trying to help her.
During the pandemic, people were taught to lack empathy for unvaccinated people and those harmed by vaccination. If empathy can be learned then perhaps sociopathy can be learned as well.
Oh, and I love your comment btw
A photo from this exact time and subject comes to mind. I recall seeing a woman holding up a sign in protest of the lockdowns. “Sacrifice the weak and reopen Tennessee,” it said. Until I discovered antisocial PD, I didn’t really know how anyone could proudly say that on a street corner. Now I get how.
@@yolandaponkers1581you have reminded me of the damage done by lockdowns and the psychopathic disregard for the death and suffering that they caused. We must do everything in our power to resist the hysterical, fearful, virtue-signalling, brainwashed lockdown-supporting tyrants in future, and say "never again"!
No- I think for the most part these ppl are broken from a very young age.
Wow there's so many ppl in this comment section here who very obviously lack empathy, as well a even BASIC critical thinking skills.. so utterly unaware of the traits they share with sociopaths!
Explain yourself please
That's not true. Extreme reactions in these comments are rooted in fear and personal experience. Fear doesn't mean lack of empathy.
My sister spent 15 years trying to get my daughter to commit suicide, abused us both. There was not much help to be had for the victims either. And she knows what she has done because she kept everything hidden😢
Sending emotional support vibes from afar.
Trusting a sociopath who tells you she's a victim so that's why she's manipulative is next-level naive.
Love the idea of learning about sociopaths but I feel this was a very happy, superficial look aiming to normalize the condition. She may be very well adjusted and have tons of support but is absolutely not the norm. Sociopaths have a compulsion to do things that are hurtful, manipulative, exploitative and cause pain and suffering, even if its not their main aim. Thats just reality. They do not care and only want to feel better. Im sure she’s trying and ‘learning’ how to feel love and empathy but that is a cognitive experience, they will never feel real love or empathy for others and that is emotionally dangerous for people around them, at the minimum. They are exploitative! In this podcast shes minimizing the illness because obviously she doesnt understand what she isnt feeling and how she can actually hurt others. Following people IS a big deal and so is breaking into houses. She’s laughing and minimizing everything, you can tell shes so emotionless and intellectualizes everything. Im so sad for her children!
I've discovered that my mother has BPD and this woman is helping me understand that the sociopaths etc exist and they are around us and are our mums and dads and not just in the movies.
Psychopath: Goal- oriented.
Highly organized.
Machiavellian in emotionless state with eye always on the ball of obtaining that end-GOAL.
Usually more intelligent than the Sociopath.
Unless goal IS to inflict chaos & pain ( as in psychosexual psychopath), any cause of pain & mayhem is just part & parcel of obtaining the goal...that pain & chaos will always be dismissed as fallout & price of obtaining the goal but it's neither the motive or payoff.
The OBTAINING of *The Goal*
( aka: 'WINNING') provides the Psychopath with his or her NARCISSISTIC FUEL.
|||
Sociopaths are MORE toxic & dangerous than the psychopath because pathological envy & pain-inflicting is ALWAYS at the helm of all they do; it's ALWAYS their motivational- factor.
While the psychopaths MAY hurt people along the way of obtaining their goal...they are not driven to DO so.
(They just don't care IF they do.)
The Sociopath, on the other hand cares VERY much that tgey do. In fact, doing so IS their goal.
The socippaths need NARCISSISTIC FUEL too but he or she obtains it a different way than the Psychopath.
Sociopaths' Aim is *always* to incite & *WITNESS* the chaos & misery *they create*
Sociopaths aim & REQUIRE to cause & *witness* it.
That makes them feel omnipotent.
Oh Christ these comments BORE me to death.
Agreed. I can see right through that fesad. She doesn't fool me 😡.
A real eye-opener, thank you.
Nearly finished this book. Fascinating insight into sociopaths
Does it warn you about them? Bc it should!!!
@@queenofthebutterflies5212 and in that case it's a useless book
@@queenofthebutterflies5212I think just realizing the things she has done are very wrong are a warning.
And she is very open with others about herself.
The charm offensive
A psychopath is born a sociopath is made.
@@serenity8876 Can you elaborate. I love this topic so much
All three of my children are very different. I wonder why my middle son was antisocial.
That's how I have always understood it. Psychopathy is biological whereas Sociopathy comes more from how you are raised.
@@lindasacks8572 Oh, my heart really goes out to you. I can't imagine how you must feel. I went through a difficult time with my son some years back and it just gnawed at my soul.
You've obviously raised your children the same as one another I'm assuming from your comment. Has your son ever had any traumatic brain injuries? Bc that can be a cause of antisocial behaviour if there are not genetic or environmental factors.
The etiology is officially unknown.
One of her tells is nervpud laught. She us lying then. When she said she made and effort always to be hyper honest with her husband...she lied and laughed. I dont want to ne anywhere near the mind of someone like this
I thought so too
There's NO WAY her husband either knows or WANTS to know the truth
There is something so delightfully perverse about discussing empathy for sociopaths. I totally agree with it. But it still makes me chuckle.
She wrote a book so in the interview she isn’t going to give it all away so ppl thinking she is being some type of way aren’t understanding the basics of marketing.
Oh, this will be interesting
What an amazing and enlightening conversation. Thank you both ladies. I’ve often wondered about sociopathy and how different it may be from what had been written about it when I tried to research it around 12 years ago following my thus far only encounter with a diagnosed sociopath. I’d not even heard of it prior to this.
For him, according to his mother, it wasn’t a from birth thing but something that shifted in him around aged 11.
I wonder if someone encounters something particularly traumatic if they can shut off so deeply in avoidance of feeling the emotions related to the trauma, that everything, all the emotions can shut down rather than it be, as is the case here with Patric, that it’s inherent in the original make-up.
This was so interesting and insightful. Thanks again ❤️
I think a lot of my friends growing up had strong sociopathic tendencies. I like them fine, but I do remember a lot of challenges. I found making myself someone whose absence would inconvenience their lives is a big part of why we ended up friends. I believed as a kid that everyone would harm you if it wasn't in their best interests not to. So my, "befriend and be indispensible" game was strong, yet I also held strong boundaries where they mattered to me. A lot of friends who believed themselves to be sociopaths were well behaved because they could understand sociatal best interests. They mentioned the cognitive understanding then the emotional understanding. The discussions were always fascinating.
You are correct.
You can’t “cognitively” learn the innate feeling of empathy, as she says she did. I believe that she *thinks* she can understand it; but it’s an extremely complex neuro-wired process that develops in-utero; and for vulnerable individuals, if not nurtured early, it’s never going to develop.
Instead, I think she believes that “seeing” things from someone else’s point of view is the same. But it’s not. Empathy is the ability to literally *feel* what someone else is feeling… and thus, feel absolutely terrible, for instance, if you’ve caused pain to another human.
Or, if you would trade someone else’s suffering for your own, to relieve them of pain. I wonder if this woman would *actually* do that if it meant saving her own child’s life. Probably not. And that’s a sociopath.
Research psylocibin lsd and other drugs, youbare terribly informed and have a terrible understanding of the typical understanding of empathy which tends towarda an ego cwnyric projection of experience or alternatively an authoritative construct of pride/shame.
But that runs along the same vein as empathy..compassion etc...theres a reason they don't feel guilty or shame either..because those emotions come from the same place so to speak..@@brentblackburn976
THANK YOU. Finally I can get insight into my boyfriend who has a darkness inside of him due to his heartbreaking upbringing.. and how he has build his life up and became such a strong person. He could have went down very negative paths but he didn't, he now has the life he deserves.
Your story at the beginning about being 7 and pretending to care about things is sooooo relateable. I didn't. I was never really sorry either when I hit other kids or said something mean. I just had no feelings about it. I'm convinced the sociopaths are sages in training from former lives. Now I'm 51 and the most emotional mature person I know. No therapy, no drugs. Just quit drinking over a year ago on my own too. Deep into my spiritual practices these days.
I am very surprised to hear all of the negative comments. I am reading the book and it is absolutely fascinating. I am learning so much and highly recommend it to anyone who wants to educate themself on sociopathy.
We live in a culture of suicidal empathy. Back in the day if a sociopath was in a tribe they were removed swiftly and violently and would never get the chance to talk on RUclips. Or ever again for that matter.
And yet we live in a world where if they are rich enough, smart enough to command a big business sucessfully everyone celebrates them, not excluding them.
Says kp8972 who writes us messages from "back in the day"
This is so weird. Trying to put sociopathy on a pedestal....what is the world coming to? People are so foolish these days.
How on earth did you think that this interview is putting sociopathy on a pedestal? 😂
@@cece9770I guess you didn't "hear" the questions she didn't ask. 😏
It's not a pedestal. It's just information. Have you not researched anything before?
46:05 love Fearne’s reaction to this 🤣
Very interesting!
I understand the interviewer having empathy for this woman, but interpersonally, sociopaths are harmful. Period.
what's actually harmful is a society that doesn't allow people to be different and doesn't have the resources for different personality types to mature and find their place without being constantly traumatized by the bandwagoners insisting on their way being the only way.
@@rongike I would say dysfunctional rather than different, there needs to be understanding of why that is.
@@jasminebarratt1809 then 99% of society is dysfunctional from my empath's perspective
@@rongike No one stops these people being "different" they are perfectly normal (and clever at presenting that picture) until they choose to cause harm on others from "built up tension". I can't believe you are victimising them. You've clearly never encountered a Sociopath to have such a viewpoint. If anything, they are overtly confident, cocky, bully types who are well respected in schools and workplaces due to their dominance and you are coming along and saying we need to help them find their place and stop traumatising them? You have no idea what you're talking about.
@@TB0991 I wasn't only talking about them, most people are unhappy in this bandwagoning society where differences are shunned, if society wasn't so cruel I wonder if sociopaths would even exist.
I can’t believe she’s married and had kids! Who would have kids with a sociopath?
Men are sexually attracted to chaotic women.
Some men will root anything.
You mean knowingly right? Because it happens all the time and unfortunately the victim has no idea til it's too late to prevent the marriage and kids.
And 90 percent of those are celebrities
And those in high power jobs where they don’t mind making cut throat decisions. Surgeons etc it could be said are suited to this personality type as they wouldn’t be emotionally involved - whereas an empathetic emotional being may feel the enormity of it all. Barristers, politicians etc come to mind too.
Most of them are narcissistic. All psychopaths are narcissists but not all narcissists are psychopaths.
*politicians, you mean
With all due respect, a significant trait of personality disorders is they lie, especially for sympathy. They may not even understand (make a complete cognitive connection) that it is a lie.
The example is when the guest claims “I would not touch anything when I broke into houses” which quickly shifted to “well I might to small things like turn off a stove that was on.”
First these two statements made within a minute of verbal conversation, knowing it was a recorded interview, the sociopath said two very different things.
Secondly, the sociopath breaking into to case people’s homes changed the story to suddenly becoming a hero, literally implying she saved lives by breaking in and turning off people’s stoves.
Thirdly, I think this sociopath turned on the stove and then would pretend it was “left on” and they were a friggen superhero for breaking in to someone’s home to “turn off” the stove.
Okay now it’s obvious the book was ghost written as she doesn’t know the facts. Many ghost write, but it is a convenient excuse to twist around the research but still try to speak knowledgeably.
So take that portion of the interview with a grain of salt. What is interesting about the interview is you see how manipulative a sociopath may be. It almost seems like they keep reinventing “truth” to make themselves look “better and better” from their (disordered) perspective.
I thought lying for sympathy was a trait for regular average humans. Lol!
Right from the outset, she created a scenario that makes her look harmless as you out line here and everything that follows must be taken with a huge grain of salt.
These people are highly adept at manipulation, but once you get it, you know better than to believe their entire presentation of who they are. That's how deep the lying goes.
@notaclue822 It's probably not wise to belive any persons presentation of who they are without critical review. Whether they are lying or not, they may have blind spots.
I hope people don't walk around trusting anything without recognizing that we're doing so...
I knew a women that was sociopathic. She cheated on her long term bf over and over again and it was very painful to watch. She was pretty difficult to live with as a roommate. It was extremely difficult to have a relationship with when they don't have any empathy for your needs. It can be painful dealing with people with this disorder but they are humans worthy of love and forgiveness. Setting boundaries can be hard when your not use to it, but that is the best way to manage. Often I listened to her stories that made my skin crawl a bit, but ultimately she was trying to open up and get relief.
I have this diagnose and what she says it's completely right. It's a spectrum. People in the comments act like she is saying all sociopaths are like me or her. She's not saying that. She's saying it's a spectrum and you shouldn't treat everyone with this disorder the same. There's a lot of us who only want to live a normal live, have relationships, job, a car and a home.
I also have ASPD and I have no desire to make someone suffer anymore. I'm not sadistic like when I was little. I live according to rules and abide by set principles now even better than some neurotypicals. Honestly, people who won't be open minded aren't worth using logic with. They want to believe something we aren't. Let them be ignorant. We know the truth. Generalizing anything and anyone is super dumb and arguing with a dumb person is a waste.
Hi 😊
I don't believe that many people are psychopaths. I have met real psychopaths and most people aren't psychopaths. But, a lot of people don't have enough empathy I noticed. A lot of people aren't nice, they're not sympathetic enough.
I agree
Disorders that work, increase over time. Because people with those disorders mate and their children are more likely to inherit those disorders. We here as sociopaths may have been 5% of the population now it is much higher, because they mate.
So she generate money out of it! Do you really think she wants to improve? I don’t think so! It’s just a thrill she gets out of it! If it keeps her calm it’s ok but I think, to trust someone like her is real tricky!
Everyone who writes a book want money out of it!
@@catnap8042 no, there are others that wants to share their truth with us…and do this not just for the money
Read the book, listen to the book. Patric tells you, she does not care, she barely feels and she'll absolutely continue to act against the darkness of apathy that, at times, swallows her.
Her work on sociopathy is a gift, but I would not trust her😮 this disorder is dangerous.
So interesting!
Listened to the audiobook it was quite interesting
She’s not a sociopath
LOL …..You must think a lot of your self
Are you the authority on sociopaths ?
She said she attacked a girl. Then after the interviewer looked at her shocked she quickly changed it to a took something out of her hair.
I think sociopaths are a lot more boring than people give them credit for. They simply lack empathy. That can result in behaviors that are harmful to others, but that’s not really the goal. They are simply without empathy. That’s it.
I would like to get with you on this note as well. I have experienced some very divine intervention possibilities, exactly for the reasons that you are saying, spotting them and being able to salvage is actually possible.
There’s probs not a lot of information & support out there re sociopathy, as typically people with this don’t tend to seek support or a diagnosis?
I know the term "sociopath" can be applied to a wide range of personalities, but if you briefly narrow the definition to include anyone who lacks compassion and empathy, and feels no remorse when acting in ways that purposefully cause harm to others, then I would confidently estimate the percentage of people with such a disorder is more like 10-15% of the population. I have personally dealt with dozens of such people, many of which had 'normal' careers in management, medicine, etc.
I love this. Patric is really courageous and inspirational, not only for other sociopaths out there, but for the neurodiverse, or anyone struggling with being the way the way they were born. But I have always been curious about different ways to diagnosing aspergers, sociopathy and psychopathy, I also always wondered whether we should really demonise a sociopath, and I do think there are those out there who do not want to admit to this label. Which makes them getting help harder. We need to destigmatise this.
Hi, that's great you are learning and I have more feedback there.... I'm not liking the use of 'Aspergers' here. As an autistic person, I fully agree with the destigmatisation of all forms of neurodivergence and it's important for the sake of not contributing to misinformation to not group autistic people so closely with conditions associated with barriers to empathy (in the same way we shouldn't conflate schizophrenia with dissociative identity disorder). 1. Autism does not affect empathy (see the 'double empathy issue' that people best relate to those that think like them so the communication gap is mutual but as autistic people we get scapegoated and expected to be the only ones working to resolve it - despite being deemed disabled) 2. We now use the label Autistic Spectrum Disorder for all levels of support needs because 3. Hans Aspergers supported the Nazi's and was responsible for sending autistic people to their deaths.
@@debbieparnell7582 I was not aware of that context behind the term but thank you for informing me this! I am also autistic and neurodiverse so support your premise.
@@clarissawright6378 you're welcome! It does make sense wanting to learn more about what other stigmatised conditions really mean from lived experience rather than assumptions.
As an Autistic Adult I must correct the misleading Diagnostic Myth that Autistic people have low emotional empathy and cognitive empathy. This used to be a diagnostic cryterion decades ago and is no longer used by up-to-date and informed Autistm Diagnosticians.
I am autistic and have strong empathy and many, many autistic people on FB groups have discussed how the debunked sbtereotype about autistic people having no/little empathy is unfair.
Some autistic people have empathy and some don’t. Society only focuses on and movies portray those autistic people who don’t have empathy.
So as Autistic People we are under the Neurodivergence Umbrella with all diverse brain differences but we share few dominating traits with Sociopaths.
As an autistic person, the term aspergers doesn’t bother me, but we are not sociopathic and would not like to be lumped into that basket, thank you! Sociopaths et al, can find a new term to talk about their brains differences!
It’s more common than we think :/ HG Tudor has NPD at 16%.. I wonder what percentage of the world’s population are true sociopaths.. I learned that all sociopaths are narcissists but not all narcissists are sociopaths.
Where is the link for the feedback please? 🙂
Do sociopaths attract each other as they move into the same towns or hang out in the same areas?
But it's still scary to think that this woman is a mother. She talks about always talking without a filter, does she just tell her kids if they're looking not so pretty, looking fat? Any regards for her kid's emotions? If her kid hurts someone at school physically or emotionally, would she even care? If she sees another child in pain, would she care? It's all these extra little things that weren't asked, that bother me. It's not that I believe she will do something bad, it's the having someone around that doesn't emotionally care if they witness something bad. As a highly sensitive person, I can't imagine willingly having someone like this in my life.
Fascinating
'A means to an end'. Says it all really😮
i think she just wants to highlight the fact that not every person with aspd is evil like colors there are multiple shades of the disorder from the most evil persom to someone who is just lacking in social skills, emotions and empathy but they dont go out and destroy lives or hurt ppl
People pleasing is insecure. It’s not that the majority of people are people pleasing. These are false dichotomies. Secure people don’t care about what stranger’s think. There is emotion around people being hurt.
Thank you for inspiring and encouraging others to understand the symptoms and seek help if needed 🙏
Yes of course there's a f**king stigma around the term. Been said in other comments in various ways but this tendency now to try to redefine concepts and in effect sympathise with them is so foolish and dangerous. A diagnosis doesn't have to have the person engaging in some sort of filmstyle violence to it for it to be valid - it just has to represent a series of traits that we wouldn't really wish on another person (or wish on the people who are forced to spend time with them)
Tee author's entire identity, work life and academic credentials are unverifiable.
This lady is so well spoken and seems very compassionate, I can see these traits in a little kid I know and have so much love for him. Funny, charismatic, incapable of empathy.
I'm sorry,,,, in my opinion,,, under ANY circumstance is it ok To DELIBERATELY AND INTENTIONALLY harm another person just to Satisfy your own needs. 😡
I am confused. She said she physically assaulted a girl when she was young. She said she assaulted the girl, not because she wanted to hurt her, but to release the “pressure” that was building up inside of her. Aren’t there other ways to release pressure-unless that “pressure” was a compulsion to carry out a deviant act, cause another person discomfort, or actually to find gratification in hurting someone?
This pressure that needed to be released seems to be directly related to the act that was carried out in order to release it.
as an empath (the opposite end of the spectrum) I can relate to not caring about what other people think about me, it's not about me, I genuinely don't want them to feel discomfort bc I feel their discomfort, if they're in discomfort so am I, it's not about improving my social status or whatever all these neurotypical people are obsessed with, I'll actually make myself smaller so I don't have to FEEL their jealousy..
Yes.
Wow, that is so true. I never realized that I do that as well. What an insight. Thank you for posting that.
She does not have a job, she has a career. It was interesting to hear the host say she maontains a job.
I haven't read the book, but from the little you are sharing here, it sounds more like common sense. Why not ask why? If someone else has made up rules, why not make up your own rules. Especially if they are making sense and not pretending. It's funny, a lot of these thoughts are on point with autism.
Psychopathy exists on a spectrum. Sociopathy is not a valid diagnosis, its all degrees of psychopathy. It's not like she is "psychopath lite"... she is a degree of psychopath and for that reason, I'm not going to buy her book or listen to this interview. All she will do is lie. I don't wish her harm, I am merely not interested in being lied to.
An opportunist, not a sociopath. . .
Uncommon honesty in her emotions, feelings, impulses, and the label.
13:13
Is it a 👎or a👍🏼?
How does ONE distinguish?
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Great STRENGTH & Big Blessings, BRAVERY & Love, Many Mercies & Joy, All the COURAGE, Compassion & Luck🍀🙏✌🏽✊🏽❤
May All be free from Suffering
Would REALLY APPRECIATE some Compassionate & REALISTIC feedback
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that feel
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Inspire, Improve, Assist, Give Compassion, Awareness, Understanding or any kindness...
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STIGMA is THE DECIDING APPLICABLE STICKER?
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When I worked in a secure unit, I was told by a psychiatrst, that the difference between a psychopath and sociopath, is that sociopaths have genuine empathy, shame and guilt etc, after doing nasty things. But they just go ahead and do more nasty things, and the cycle starts again.
If sociopathy exists on a spectrum, individuals like Susan Smith, who infamously murdered her children in 1994, would likely be situated at the extreme end, bordering on psychopathy. Conversely, those positioned at the lower end of this spectrum, as suggested by the author, may have potential for treatment aimed at effectively managing their disorder.
Something that should be acknowledged is that sociopaths exist because there is a necessity for their unique traits. Highly empathic individuals, while deeply attuned to emotions, may not always possess the emotional resilience required for tasks that necessitate a lack of empathy. This contrast sheds light on why leadership roles often find better alignment with individuals who possess such traits.
This is why messiah offers us a new heart. Our heart is our will and desires, our feelings and intellect is our souls. Our spirit is our words, which is a record of our hearts. Biblical definitions.
Is it just me or do they look like twin sisters?
Totally glossed over. Not as peachy as described here, at least for those nearby.
Always the victim.. but thank you for the honesty ❤
Interesting.
Everybody can turn into a sociopath and killer.
I am convinced of that.
Btw.
Look around you.
From bottom up, to bottom low...
I have seen, met, observed, many humans, who do not care, are hard, but all learn to mask.
We all learn to lie very early on to navigate life. We gaslight, manipulate...
We do all necessary to avoid punishment, ridicule, humiliation shame, being slapped ( spilling the milk as a toddler for example ) by mom, dad or they get angry and you want to avoid this in the future. You learn to lie and so on for selfpreservation in all kind of ways.
You get better after each experiences.
All people motivate you to build pressure up...
We as primates are not as easy to live with and we learn from it every single day.
I agree with you .