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Reminds me of a song, about how people become "somebody that I used to know" Sometimes, that's just the turn things take. But life goes on. A wise man once told me, "Remember the past and consider the future. But live in present." That's how I've held it ever since. I cherish my memories, all the fun we had, but I don't dwell on it. Life goes on, and new people become important to you. And that's a good thing - new memories to be created.
I've outgrown almost every friendship. My friends never really cared about me and I was just stuck in one sided friendships which is way worse than being alone. So I'm fine how I'm now.
You what’s really fun? “Growing out of people” into naught. “It’s a good thing to move over from past friendships into newer, more compatible ones”. I agree. It is a good thing.
I hope by now you are feeling better about the lost friendship. I am probably much older than you but still understand the feeling of realizing a friendship has changed. A year or two ago I took a hard and objective look at some friendships that opened my eyes to some realities I hadn't noticed before. It's not easy but it does help to see things as they really are, not as we would like them to be. No matter the age, we continue to learn from experience. Wishing you all the best.
Oh boy , same here but I am not upset about it anymore . 24 years of friendship. I haven’t heard from her for a few months . People change , we move on
I think the biggest sign you’ve outgrown a friend is when you’ve literally outgrown them…like they want and expect you to stay in the confines of the box that they’ve created for you. They constantly dismiss anything about you that provides for your expansion and readily accept pictures of you that show you to be small
I am surprised and glad I read your comment. I am losing a friend who was toxic and was happy to be so, as they typically are. As you said, this person's habits were to see me as small.😢 Recently, this person ran into a personally disastrous situation, so I responded to her email after a few years absent. She hadn't changed and froze me out again. Since I won't help this person except with supporting words, I guess, thinking of it, that is probably why. When I was in a similar position years ago, she did the same. We actually could have both done more, but this is not a deep bond as it might have been. So, for the best.😊
I struggle to let go of friendships, I’m quite a clingy person. To anyone who has a clingy friend, don’t get annoyed that their so clingy, fear drives them to be like that. Just talk to them privately and ask why if they willing to tell you. I’m clingy because of my struggle to make friends, have trust issues and much more.
Letting go actually requires more strength then holding on a lot of times. So, I totally agree! You'll learn in life sometimes you won't want to let go, so some people don't. But the strongest people are able to let go and grow into a better version of themselves. Letting go isn't easy but holding on, just holds you back.
Just like anything in life, friendships come and go. When this happens, I like to look back at it fondly for good memories and remember the growth it provided for the person I am today 🤗
@@AD-jq7ow I do, but I figured most, some just moved away and lost contact. Most were toxic and left me as soon stood up for myself. Others left because I was too clingy or had no longer anything in common
I have some friends that I know since more than 10 years ago and that no longer serve me. They are not bad people or didn’t do anything wrong to me, but our interests and goals are no longer compatible. I recently started to feel the need to be distant from them. I sometimes feel guilty about feeling this way. However, removing old relations that don’t add to your life is necessary to eventually make room for better people 😊
it’s actually more tiring to still prolong a friendship when both sides have outgrown it obviously. like why are we still holding on and forcing it when it’s not working anymore i think just letting it go through mutual agreement is healthier, no bad blood just closure
There is so often some self-interest behind most friendships which is why that friendship without self-interest is one of the rare and beautiful things in life. One good friend is worth more than a thousand fake ones 🖖
tbh I think however small, there's still a self-interest aspect to every kind of friendship. the most bare minimum is everybody want/need another's open heart, so you don't feel lonely by yourself any longer.
I'm growing distant from almost everyone. It's as if I'm choosing to stay away from anyone who I disagree with because almost all of my life I've always been a yay person, agreeing with everyone. Now, I understand that friendships are important for self growth, hence I don't want friends who judge me. Even if it means I'm only speaking with my colleagues and not making good friends, I'm better off focusing on my work and hobbies and family 😀
‼️ timestamps ‼️ 0:13 - introduction 1) 0:54 - “your values conflict” 2) 1:25 - “you don’t spend time together anymore” 3) 1:52 - “you don’t tell each other everything like you used to” 4) 2:25 - “things don’t feel natural with them anymore” 5) 2:53 - “would you still be friends if you met them today?” 3:50 - outro hope these were useful
This is currently happening to me. Although it's a little upsetting that I may be the only one aware of it. It's difficult to just cut the thread with the people you've spent years together with. To me, the most difficult is realizing that I've outgrown a lot of friendships for a long time and learning to accept that fact. However, looking at another angle, outgrowing friendships is a sign of a level of maturity. You're becoming aware of your compatibility with others, realizing that there are some things needed to be let go of in order for us to better ourselves. Doing so may help us create a better and healthier relationship with people.
The thing is I really don't know if the problem is me or my friends. I have a friend group that I've had ever since freshman year and I'm a senior now but lately all my friends ever talk about are guys. It's always about boys and we rarely ever talk about other stuff. I always find myself wanting more in my friendships... I really don't know if this is Envy, Or me outgrowing my friend group. I'm happy that my friends are getting boyfriends but I hate that boys are always our topic now. :(
@@Imakeawesomeeditsforrealomg i relate to this so much, Im a senior as well all and all my friend talks about is guys, and it makes me not want to really talk with her much.. Even when i try to talk about different things she barely puts in effort in the conversation
To be honest I feel like I’ve outgrown pretty much every one of my friendships I just stay friends with them because it’s awkward when I see them everyday at school. I relate to most of the signs
same...I have this friend that doesnt let me go like, she is very toxic sometimes. I just think about a life without her and it gives me this strange type of peace. But i dont want her to be sad, i just wish she wasnt a bad person.
Same here, most ppl from my school ask me if I want to meet up but I’m not interested in them anymore or pretend I don’t know them bc they excluded me then so yeah...
You will soon be out of school and will find a new world out there. Meanwhile balance your time with your current friends and alone time to get to know yourself better and what it is that you seek in friendships. A new life will open up to you.
I’m bisexual and gender questioning and my best friend is VERY against LGBTQ+ And well I’m very introverted and hate hurting peoples feelings but she says what she feels And I told her I’m bi and she still hates on LGBTQ+ when I’m around And I told her that I was gender questioning and she said “Your probably not, I mean you’ve always been a girl” And I just smiled and nodded my “thanks”
I feel you. The pandemic has really soured things, but at the same time reaching out can really weed out which friendship is worth pursuing in the future. P.S.: great profile picture, by the way.
For me it was the opposite, because we were all away and moving on with our lives, everyone in different cities, but when the pandemic started we became closer through social media, and because we had noone to talk about our problems, we became our only support uwu i suggest u make a group with all your friends, so u can chat of whatever
it makes me so so sad when I outgrow a friendship!! But I realized that longevity aka how long youve been friends with someone should not be the only reason to stay friends with them. I have no animosity or hate towards my old friends, it's just we are very very different now. There are still days that I think back to an old memory and I get nostalgic and sad
I was once close to a friend (we were once close like brothers). However, along the way, as I grew and evolved, he didn't. Additionally, he said some nasty remarks that left a sour taste in my mouth. We got to the point where things weren't naturally joyous anymore. I literally felt that I had to walk on eggshells cause he was emotionally immature. We admitted to drifting, but I can't really say he's that best friend I once knew...it is a sad thing
I’m going through the same thing. I realized that I outgrown my friendship with my best friend a long time ago , but the only thing that can’t make me let it go is the fact that we know each other since we were little and all the memories that we have together. Sometimes it breaks me into tears but maybe one day I’ll be strong enough to come to the realization that we’re two different people and we don’t have anything in common anymore.
@@kellis9346 I know exactly how you feel and it really sucks. You just want to hold on so badly and like these were people you’d think would be in your wedding party and future. And I don’t think there’s anything I could have done to keep the friendship together and it’s hard to let go.
@@tommygunn6901 I’m going through the same thing. As time passes, I feel more and more emotionally unsafe talking to this friend. Their way of “comforting” me is not comforting at all. Most of the time I feel like I’m being gaslighted and told my emotions don’t matter. It still hurts tho because I know that their behavior probably comes from their parents’ way of raising them. And I’m struggling to let them go because they feel familiar and I don’t wanna be “left alone.”
This makes me feel so much better. I've been going through a friendship edit for a number of years and because of a misplaced sense of loyalty I continued relationships with people who I've known since childhood even though I really don't have much in common with them anymore. What a relief to move on.
For me small friend groups have more drama cause we’re always with each other. I’m currently taking a bit of a break from my small friend group. I’m not sure if it’s permanent yet but I just know it feels great already. The small friend group had ppl I’ve know for 4 or 5 years but recently I’ve been feeling trapped in those friendships like if I do anything they will stop being friends with me and I’ve been more worried abt that then having fun and being friends with them
Looking back, most of my past friendships ended because we simply stopped calling each other. No big fights or anything dramatic just life moved on and we got too caught up in our own lives
This video makes me feel less crazy lol. I used to think something was wrong with me because so many friends and I have drifted apart due to lack of compatibility over time.
I've had a friend of 4 years who drifted away from me because we no longer have the same level of connection as from before, and that we have different conflicting values that is no longer beneficial to me and I think it's still beautiful and I don't blame myself for it. Not all friendships last forever, and that outgrowing them is a sign of maturity on your end. ✨
I’ve had a best friend for my entire life, but lately things have been so different. Even before covid. We never do anything, barely talk and have basically nothing in common anymore. I don’t want to let her go, but it’s probably time to find others.
We all outgrow friendships at some point in our lives, regardless of how close we've been with someone in the past. If you're not sure if it's a phase or the real thing, we've got some clear signs that you can run through.
1. Your values conflict 0:54 2. You don't spend time together anymore 1:23 3. You don't tell each other everything like you used to 1:52 4. Things don't feel natural with them anymore 2:24 5. Would you still be friends if you met them today? 2:53 I hope I could help! :)
This video has shown that the friendship that I have with a friend has outgrown. I am going to let the person know and let him go. I have problems with letting go and still processing my past griefs. What I can take for this is this friend is here to make me learn about the process of letting go. It hurts but I think I can take this step next week.
I see you psych2go, corpse husband drawing on the wall, always making us super comfortable in this little internet space which I love. Thank you for being there for us❤
I feel like the reason the pandemic ended a lot of people's friendships is because You're interests and joys grew seperarely over a long period of time. It's like meeting a new person at that point
I'm turning 30 next year and although I don't have a lot of friends to begin with, I feel like I've outgrown my remaining set of friends, especially after realizing that they never really cared for what I did or achieved.
It’s okay if this happens. I had a friendship that nearly lasted 15 years, we met on the first day of elementary school and we were always together. Over time, we both evolved into to two different people with completely different mindsets, interests and personalities and we had MANY arguments. The friendship turned toxic after time. She always wanted to keep staying friends with me, but I didn’t want her in my life anymore, after a whole lotta arguments and some dumb actions from her part, I decided to cut the bond. She was really petty about it, but I couldn’t care less. I felt like I had to be friends with her because I knew her for so long, but this shouldn’t be a reason to stay friends with someone, especially not if you’re not feeling good in her company. Now I definitely know, that it was the best thing to do, after all that, I realized how toxic she was, but I still wish her the best and I don’t hold any grudges for what she had done.
This video is so timely for me as I have just ended a 50 year friendship and am feeling some guilt about it. Understanding that we do not have similar values and that have outgrown her is so helpful to free me up to find people who are more like me!
I just went through a much sadder situation. I met someone in 2020 that really got along with me very well at first. We were fast becoming friends. People saw that we talked like we knew each other 10 years even though we had only knew each other for a few months. But then he started to change, rather quickly. It was very overwhelming because usually this situation would happen over a period of time. This was happening in a period of 6 months. Imagine a 5 year friendship process crammed into 6 months. Finally, a rift in our friendship was created. It was a shocker for me emotionally. I had to go for counseling because the turn of events was too quick. Again, imagine a 5 year situation crammed into a few months. But there was another layer, he was showing signs of mental illness. This explained everything. I found out he lost friends prior to meeting me. He was looking for a new friend. But I realized as long as he is not treating his problems, he will not be able to have friendships.
Going into my early 20s, me & my friends are a lot more busy with work, relationships, & college. I still ask my friends to hang out but even when they’re free it seems like they don’t want to. I try not to take it personal and think maybe something’s going on in their lives. It just sucks when you’re putting in all the effort.
It IS personal though........life happens, but the excuse that there isn't enough time is just that: an excuse Why is it that with my hectic life I still find the time to reach out to them yet they don't have the means of the same? Because I am not registered as important enough to MAKE time for. Simple as that. If it is important, people make time. If you are the ONLY one putting in the time and effort then they are blatantly saying you are jot worth the time and effort to them; that's what I finally realized with my own friend group after almost 10 years of being the one to make all the efforts and when finally I stopped reaching out first I stopped hearing from all of them
I've outgrown some friendships, but we still stuck together. It was always fun to be around with them, and stars align for us to be paired to be a team. We might not be as close but, we'd always be friends
My best friend right now is seemingly becoming more distant as of late, we used to talk and call all the time but now there is nothing. I want to find other people but nobody ever seems to fit besides what I used to have with my (now distant) best friend. It's a whirlwind of emotions and life kinda sucks rn ngl
Wow I can’t believe this was posted today.... for this past week I’ve been thinking about how me and my friend are so different now and that i want to make new friends that I can actually be compatible with... :( I guess this is a sign it’s really time to let go...
Thank you for this video 😭 I never thought I needed this information so much 😔 I've recently cut ties with someone I considered my close friend. Every point in this video is true and it's similar from what I've experienced. For everyone who is reading this, please remember that it's okay to grow and change as a better version of yourself. Do what you think is right, if you don't felt like continuing a friendship.. That is also okay. Friendship should be something that you can grow and learn together as a human. So please remember to prioritize in yourself first..
0:36 I recognize that hairstyle! It’s Twilight Sparkle!! *Friendship is Magic* ✨ 0:49 Celestia 🌟 1:54 Apple Bloom 🍎 2:30 Sunset Shimmer 🌅 3:37 Pinkie Pie ( or Cheerile), Rarity and Fluttershy 3:49 Sweetie Belle and Button Mash
There are some friendships that last a lifetime. My best friend and I met in our first year of school, and here we are 35 years later still the best of friends. We go out to the pub, catch the newest terrible films, play the latest awful games for the gitz and shiggles, and our wives are basically in the same boat. I wish more friendships could last like that
I feel like my best friend and I have really lost touch since she's had kids and I'm childfree by choice. Even before the pandemic, we really have nothing in common anymore except a shared past but I am finding it difficult to constantly be the one initiating communication (and being super flexible about times because of the kids) but she never initiates communication. It's like she's forgotten about our friendship.
I experienced this recently. It's really heartbreaking that you feel like you don't know one another anymore and feel like this friend is becoming one of those who contradict you. Thank you for the video, it made clear that what I am going through is normal. I have just need to pass through it as it is just recent. :/
Some people youve met were never meant to be staying in your lives. They are just here to help become a better person, to teach you something meaningful, or just giving you some good memories. Losing a good friend is certainlu painful, but that doesnt mean you can find more along the way.
Going to a different college, the pandemic, and my family moving farther away really opened my eyes and let me realize just how little they truly cared about me. It took a really long time for me to acknowledge that I'd outgrown these people and that they didn't genuinely care for me as a friend. Over like the course of a year I felt this hella slow burn mix of disappointment, jealousy, hurt, and anger towards these people I genuinely cared a lot about and tried to always do my best to help them. It really hurts when you realize your best friends stopped considering you a best friend at some point along the way. I'm trying to let go, but it really doesn't help when one of them happens to transfer to your college lmao. I literally can't escape
Sometimes these are good opportunities for you yourself to mature and go in new directions. Your life does not need to stay the same and it's better that new things happen. Explore new places, hobbies, and styles.
@@goldcherriesbeing abandoned by people you cared about and thought cared about you is never a "good thing"...... I already am maturing and changing and growing; I don't need abandonment issues to develope character
I think I outgrew my friendship with my best friend.. She's into stuff that I really don't appreciate at all and it seems like we're too different now... I still really like her but she just seems so childish to me? (I'm a bit childish too but in a different way), while she's focused on her k-idols and fanfiction stuff I'm getting annoyed by these things and the things I'm trying to focus on are more on the "preparing for adulthood" side like learning to maintain the house always clean, cooking, trying to get a job, learning to be responsible with money, etc. I really don't think we're that close anymore... Sorry for the giant comment but since I don't want to tell her this I don't really have anybody else to talk about this to, so thank you for listening.
I get it- I’ve been feeling the same way and it’s been almost an year (also she’s my only friend left from HS) Once I tried breaking it w her but she just “didn’t let me” , also I’m very shy and couldn’t assert myself (like always) and I just felt like once again I had no other choice than to stay friends w her but the more I’m extending this friendship, the more it feels like a “chore” like replying and hanging out w her feels like a chore. I don’t have any reasons as to why she’s “toxic” , ig we just are - well I don’t vibe w her anymore and maybe I’ve outgrown her So I totally get what u r saying, I also don’t have anyone whom I can talk abt this . 😶 Also once again I’m going to end this and assert myself more as I cannot do this anymore to myself cuz honestly I’d rather be alone Might update this comment once it FINALLY ENDS 😩 edit: its been more than a week since it ended- it was super awkward cuz like she cried and i felt guilty after that but ive just come to terms w it cuz its none of us’ faults :/
I mean it sounds like you're maturing a little faster than she is...but then you guys are supposed to be different I mean what's the fun in being the same? But it sounds like her interests are what's annoying you and thats a little unfair; to expect her to be just like you or you can't be friends. Having different interests doesn't mean outgrowing someone I mean if you have a problem with her being herself? She isn't the one with the issue 😉
@@Leoprincess3038 different but it should be complimenting, not a source of annoyance and separation. Sure there are some things that we can compromise to tolerate them and maybe this is not one of them for him/her. I'm in a similar situation however my party is as mature as Me. In fact we are both quite mature for our age.
Me too, and sometimes i question myself if im in the wrong for thinking that way. Maybe theyre not being too carefree, maybe im the one being too serious. But the thing is, i live a relatively carefree life and i am happy, i guess our definition of enjoying life doesn’t align anymore and it hurts :/
I struggle with making friends a lot and the friends that I have don't really feel like friends to me anymore so this video really helped me. Thank you
I have a best friend, and she hasn't been speaking with me a lot. we have been friends for almost 2 years, she now has many other best friends, and we barely go to hang our with each other anymore. :( I'm also afraid she's getting more toxic. I think my friend has outgrown our friendship, thank you for telling me!
I have a bestfriend I have known for 7 years but we moved away from eachother 3 years ago and It’s always I who starts the conversation so now I have been waiting in 2 months for her to be the first one who texts but she didn’t do it😔 So same, I also think I have outgrown a friendship :(
I have a bestfriend I had since more than 9 years but since we were torn apart into different classes,met different people and I showed her K-Pop I feel like I don't really know her anymore.A friend who once was happy,cheerful,funny,brave and an open book turned I don't know either...It just feels like she is not even interested in talking to me.Normally she would start conversations and tell jokes ect.Now I'm the one trying to break the awkward silence between us two when I visit her.And so on...
After watching this I thought back to a a friend from kindergarten we hung out every day she came over to my house I went over to hers and we enjoyed each other's company as we grew up we started to get different hobbies,Friends, She got popular I got labeled as the weird kid, We just didn’t really have anything to talk about And then Covid came along and we stopped hanging out all together, she was dear friend to me and Part of me wishes we were still friends, We still have mutual respect one could say, Recently when my dog passed she had heard about it and asked how I was doing and if I was okay because she knew my dog when she was younger and she knew I loved my dog, Really I just hope she dosent forget the fun times we had together when we were little, Thank you for the times we cherished that really what I’d like to say.
I have trusted many people that later screwed me over. I no longer tell anyone anything, even family deaths and how I feel at all. Anyone else feel that way?
Try talking to her about it. Often people don't realize how important they are to us. But also notice if their actions change. If it has been just words -leave them 🙌 if they explain why they do certain things and try making more space for you, gicve it another go (: sometimes, just like romantic relationships, platonic relationships need commitment and change as well
Try reaching out to her and ask how she’s doing or call her. If she doesn’t answer you or makes time for you, then just let the friendship go. It’s not worth being the only person hanging on if she doesn’t care about your feelings.
I don't have a single friend now. I've seen videos saying "you don't realize that not having any friends right now is a prime time for you because all doors are open for you and you have no one to limit you". And yes, I see that as true. But, knowing I'll be walking through the doors alone for possible years is what hurts me the most.
I had a whole year where I had no friends. One piece of advice stay hopeful and realise anyone and I mean anyone can be your new friend. Even if you don’t like them at first. I didn’t like my two besties till I became friends
@@queenchill6352 It's just so difficult because since I was little I've always lived as someone who lives to keep others happy no matter the sacrifices. Because everyone left, it feels like I didn't do a good job in keeping them happy. I don't want that to happen again, but I also don't know how to stop letting people use me for their benefit since it always keeps a smile on their face. I'm just, hurt and lost. Having hope in all of this is really hard to do. But, thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to read my comment and even give your own comment. Although it's going to be an emotional rollercoaster, I still plan to keep trying. Your comment today helped a lot more than you may think😊
I had friends and for the past months, they have outgrown both because they have more interesting moments that can be spent time with their new friends. Tbh, I’ve never felt really connected with them whenever they’re around with those people. I’m slowly distancing myself from them.
It's kinda something that I outgrown my friendships way too shortly that I always cling on to someone for a year or two and this has been going on my whole life
I really needed this, because I have this friend and we drifted apart too, and every time we did talk for just a little bit I wouldn’t be comfortable because I can’t trust her either. I’ve been thinking about ending the friendship for a while but I just didn’t know how to or to even say the words out because I realized we are really two different people with two completely different mindsets and I feel like I need to move on and find a circle just right for me
It's better to be alone than to be with someone who lowers your vibration. Don't be afraid of being alone. You are connected to the cosmos always. And you will find somebody who shares your values soon enough!
I have friends, since my first memories, memories with them will never change,but now iv never talked to them often,and they don't reply anymore, but my life will never forget them, because, the truth is, I want to make my friends feel loved
I have been doubting that I am no longer in the friendship and here u made me damn sure about it !! My only friendship died today......only remnants are the formal hi hlos and fake smiles...
Welcome, fellow time traveler. My name is Rusaka, nice to meet you! You’re allowed to time travel anytime and anywhere, but there’s one rule: Don’t reveal how to time travel. It takes away the special effect. Enjoy time traveling!💖💖
I feel tension from the things I did wrong as far as five years ago. It's been happening since last year and it's draining me although this is a supportive person and fun to be around. I just want to come off of the phone and feel good about myself afterwards though.
Imagine how amazing it is our friend or best friend who understand us the most and knows all of our secrets was a stranger before just as how scary it is to think of one day we might become stranger again...I think friendship is so fragile and vulnerable, that is why it's so valuable :) even though I'm alone now, when I see our pictures or remember our memories, I unconsciously smile alone...
I just changed schools recently and I don't talk to my best friend anymore. We used to live in the same city, but since I moved there's just no chance of us meeting anymore. I found new friends, I'm starting to forget about my best friend and every time I remember that, I cry, realizing I'm forgetting about the person that was once the only one who supported me.
I'm going through this rn and I'm trying so hard to save the friendship but I don't think that's an option anymore and they're making me feel like the bad guy. So watching this helps me feel so much better thank you!
I dumped my best friend because she agreed with a girl who talked shit about me, I dumped her but I contacted her to try and rebuild are friendship. since we talked in school and stuff, she said “I have a new friend group now anyways” I wanted to cry. I felt so alone. it’s so hard to let go even though she was toxic. it’s unfair that she’s doing better while I’m having mental breakdowns every day. life sucks, sometimes it’s hard to live.
I've outgrown almost all my friendships one year ago. It took me a long time to accept it. But it still hurts a lot. I have the feeling that since I learnt to truly love myself and be completely myself with others, I don't know where I belong anymore. I find it so unfair. I thought loving myself would bring joy in my life, not loneliness. Sometimes, I feel it was easier to adapt myself to others. Finally, I found some people with who I can truly be myself but that's only the beginning. So I often continue to feel alone.
Life can be tough for the many people, especially when they don’t have much connections during their childhood. This not only makes practicing the balance of having a friend difficult, but also can be a huge issue as a person has matured and has lost their commonalities due to having a close relationship for too long (especially if the number of friends are few) solving such a problem can be a big burden on those which stood too long with their few best friends.
i wanna break the friendship with my best friend bc.. reasons, but they’ll literally not be able to move on and.. probably end up dead. and i love them too much to let that happen.
I didn't use to have good boundaries and I would let people disrespect me or just go along with things I didn't really support. Now that I'm standing up for myself, I'm finding that I'm losing friends because they don't really respect boundaries. It is their way or the highway. I'll take the highway.
When you come from an abusive family and live in a predominantly lonely society with no authentic sense of community, sometimes friendships are all you have. The fact that we are seemingly expected to discard people at the drop of a hat over small, superficial differences is demoralizing. I wish there was more emphasis on appreciating others' differences and less energy put into black-and-white thinking about relationships. You don't have to stop caring about someone just because they went down a different career path than you or they got married or started a family and you're single, even if you can't spend as much time together as you once did. You don't have to stop caring about someone simply because they live far away, even if you don't speak as often as you used to. It's ok if these relationships evolve, and it's ok to expand your circle and connect with more people too. You can still keep people in your heart without holding on too tightly. Obviously, this does not apply to people who become toxic/abusive. It would be extremely detrimental to hold onto these relationships. Best to simply let these people go.
Thank you so much for this video. For a long time, I was concerned every time I noticed that I was gradually losing some of my friends, friends I had known, in some cases, for many years. Indeed, life is an uninterrupted process of changes, transformations, often subtle, to the point that we hardly notice them, sometimes painful. And the same goes for everyone. The problem is that I often refused to face reality. I persisted in clinging to chimeras, ghosts of the past. To paraphrase C. G. Jung, when someone is too much in our thoughts, when the relationship we have with that person becomes more and more one-way, that is a sign that we are investing too much energy in that person. As far as I was concerned, having always been of an insecure temperament, the fear of finding myself in front of a great void terrified me. Of course, it could only result in a deep sense of moral distress for me. Learning to accept change, that others do not belong to us, and to let it go is a completely healthy process and a sign of maturity. The idea is not to blame anyone. If we wait too long for a door that is closed to us to open, we do not see all the other doors that are already wide open. Cleaning up your backyard is more than just throwing away what is no longer suitable for us. It is also, and above all, making room to integrate new objects that will make us happy. With simplicity and clarity, you have made me (re)aware of an essential reality of life. For that alone, again, I say a huge thank you.
I was always questioning my friendships and I always thought that I don't belong somehow, but they were my friends since middle school (now I am a freshman) and I had no other friends so I had to let it go. But with Corona lockdown, I got more time for myself and my family and finally got a chance to slow down and rethink things, yes they are my friends and they are nice, but this relationship is doing me more harm than good, I can't even count how many times I came home after school crying on my bed while they couldn't care less. After corona and us separating in universities, I realized how we became really different and our interests are really different now. They are good people, they never meant to harm me on purpose, but it was too many hurtful moments to endure. But what really broke me was the fact that I've considered our friendship as something greater than they did, I thought we will be friends forever while they had set their mindset that we will break up after high school, so they didn't even put the effort to maintain it. Now some of them are trying to reach me, but getting away from them made me a lot happier, although I do really miss them every second, but mental health is more important.
I'm going to the same phase right now with my friends group. For a longer time now I don't feel comfortable around them anymore - and they've got much different interests then me - and I'm thinking what's the best way to let them know how I feel about that without burning bridges.
You voted in our community poll. Here's the video release! Have you checked out our other related friendship videos yet? 6 Signs That it's Time to Let Go of a Best Friend: ruclips.net/video/nNgIi4eJduY/видео.html
7 Signs You Shouldn't End A Friendship: ruclips.net/video/TA9t3YX0ShA/видео.html
hi :)
Love u psych2go!
Hello
Your art is so beautiful 😌
Thank you so much for these videos... It actually helps me a lot... Not just me, many others too. Thank you 💕
not friends
not enemies
Just strangers that has memorise
Written very poetically :)
Srry where’s my grammar
Not friends
Not enemies
Just strangers that have memories
@@LuxIuxit's ok to do grammer mistakes rather than lacking emotions. You have expressed your feelings and that's enough ❤
@@Decentgirl005 ty!
Reminds me of a song, about how people become "somebody that I used to know"
Sometimes, that's just the turn things take. But life goes on. A wise man once told me, "Remember the past and consider the future. But live in present."
That's how I've held it ever since. I cherish my memories, all the fun we had, but I don't dwell on it. Life goes on, and new people become important to you. And that's a good thing - new memories to be created.
the feeling is weird cause it's sad but freeing at the same time
Yes exactly
Feels like a paradox.
How are things now? Any new changes or regrets?
I've outgrown almost every friendship. My friends never really cared about me and I was just stuck in one sided friendships which is way worse than being alone. So I'm fine how I'm now.
It's normal and it means you've grown to become a better person :) - Cindy
@@Psych2go Thank you for comforting me ;-)
@@githala_manisha Noice
Awe luv I feel you completely 💗. I hope you’re doing better and ok ! You will meet people that genuinely care about you I know you will!
You what’s really fun? “Growing out of people” into naught.
“It’s a good thing to move over from past friendships into newer, more compatible ones”.
I agree. It is a good thing.
Coronavirus has destroyed so many friendships of mine it’s horrible...
But it leaves room for more friends!
The VERY person that I was thinking about throughout this entire video is due in a vast part to Covid-19. 🦠☣️
Same, I argued with my WHOLE F***ING CLASS and broke up my friendship of 8 years
You're lucky you have friends I don't I'm always alone
Same. I actually just got "dumped" by a toxic friend last night, but I made a new friend at the exact same time. :)
This made me cry because I've realized I've outgrown the friendship with my +10 years best friend, and it hurts like hell
I hope by now you are feeling better about the lost friendship. I am probably much older than you but still understand the feeling of realizing a friendship has changed. A year or two ago I took a hard and objective look at some friendships that opened my eyes to some realities I hadn't noticed before. It's not easy but it does help to see things as they really are, not as we would like them to be. No matter the age, we continue to learn from experience. Wishing you all the best.
Thats exactly what I'm going through right now with 15 years of friendship
@@superash4u578 going through the same rn, I feel you. Sending love!!
Oh boy , same here but I am not upset about it anymore . 24 years of friendship. I haven’t heard from her for a few months . People change , we move on
Me too, I’ve known her since I was a toddler
I think the biggest sign you’ve outgrown a friend is when you’ve literally outgrown them…like they want and expect you to stay in the confines of the box that they’ve created for you. They constantly dismiss anything about you that provides for your expansion and readily accept pictures of you that show you to be small
This.
This is a clear sign that it's time to move away from your group so you can evolve in a new one.
I am surprised and glad I read your comment. I am losing a friend who was toxic and was happy to be so, as they typically are. As you said, this person's habits were to see me as small.😢
Recently, this person ran into a personally disastrous situation, so I responded to her email after a few years absent. She hadn't changed and froze me out again.
Since I won't help this person except with supporting words, I guess, thinking of it, that is probably why.
When I was in a similar position years ago, she did the same. We actually could have both done more, but this is not a deep bond as it might have been.
So, for the best.😊
Some people think that it's holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it's letting go. 💞
Agreed! No matter what sort of relationship it is. Sometimes staying together can make things worse ,’:(
I struggle to let go of friendships, I’m quite a clingy person.
To anyone who has a clingy friend, don’t get annoyed that their so clingy, fear drives them to be like that. Just talk to them privately and ask why if they willing to tell you. I’m clingy because of my struggle to make friends, have trust issues and much more.
Letting go actually requires more strength then holding on a lot of times. So, I totally agree! You'll learn in life sometimes you won't want to let go, so some people don't. But the strongest people are able to let go and grow into a better version of themselves. Letting go isn't easy but holding on, just holds you back.
True
@@Cr4zy3lf Some men tend to do that, especially when they lost their wives.
Sees my little pony character: But friendship is magic!
I thought I was tripping it’s been so long since I’ve watched the show 😂😭
I counted, like, 5 pony-colored characters in the intro.
2:42 "My Little -Pogchamp- Pony"
@@dovewing3986 on the book
@@mediciki602 sameee I had to look at them like 4 times cuz I wasn’t sure if I was tripping 😂😂
Just like anything in life, friendships come and go. When this happens, I like to look back at it fondly for good memories and remember the growth it provided for the person I am today 🤗
Indeed 😊
So you don't think about why they don't want to hang with you anymore ? And why they lost interest in you?
@@AD-jq7ow the video answers it, you’re outgrowing your friendship
Nope they don't come and go for me, everyone just hates me for being an introvert.
@@AD-jq7ow I do, but I figured most, some just moved away and lost contact. Most were toxic and left me as soon stood up for myself. Others left because I was too clingy or had no longer anything in common
I have some friends that I know since more than 10 years ago and that no longer serve me. They are not bad people or didn’t do anything wrong to me, but our interests and goals are no longer compatible. I recently started to feel the need to be distant from them. I sometimes feel guilty about feeling this way. However, removing old relations that don’t add to your life is necessary to eventually make room for better people 😊
The fact that this got posted the same day I’m no longer best friends with someone
Sorry to hear that! 😕 You will find someone else that deserve you as a best friend - Cindy
I'm sorry, I hope you can heal from this.
More evidence that we live in a simulation
@@sleepyote Thank you❤️
@@colebeans3145 HAHAAHHAA FOR REALL
it’s actually more tiring to still prolong a friendship when both sides have outgrown it obviously. like why are we still holding on and forcing it when it’s not working anymore i think just letting it go through mutual agreement is healthier, no bad blood just closure
Healthy closure is always a good way to go and that's done through good communication.
There is so often some self-interest behind most friendships which is why that friendship without self-interest is one of the rare and beautiful things in life. One good friend is worth more than a thousand fake ones 🖖
This is a quote
This the one!
Wow this is so true and very based
tbh I think however small, there's still a self-interest aspect to every kind of friendship. the most bare minimum is everybody want/need another's open heart, so you don't feel lonely by yourself any longer.
I'm growing distant from almost everyone. It's as if I'm choosing to stay away from anyone who I disagree with because almost all of my life I've always been a yay person, agreeing with everyone. Now, I understand that friendships are important for self growth, hence I don't want friends who judge me. Even if it means I'm only speaking with my colleagues and not making good friends, I'm better off focusing on my work and hobbies and family 😀
What if your family is toxic.
I understand you, i'm in a similar situation
Cool, I've outgrown the only friend I had. So who is next, outgrowning myself
You opened up space for new ones. Join me on that quest.
You make new non toxic ones. Trust me
Same.
I have a close friend but we've drifted apart she bully😭😂but also funny soo idk😩
no. the next thing is making new friends
Life is constant change. Pay attention to what makes you happy. Friendships should not be work.
‼️ timestamps ‼️
0:13 - introduction
1) 0:54 - “your values conflict”
2) 1:25 - “you don’t spend time together anymore”
3) 1:52 - “you don’t tell each other everything like you used to”
4) 2:25 - “things don’t feel natural with them anymore”
5) 2:53 - “would you still be friends if you met them today?”
3:50 - outro
hope these were useful
Very useful. Thanks!
Thanks
Cheers.
Very useful indeed... thank you very much🙏
Public services be like:
This is currently happening to me. Although it's a little upsetting that I may be the only one aware of it. It's difficult to just cut the thread with the people you've spent years together with. To me, the most difficult is realizing that I've outgrown a lot of friendships for a long time and learning to accept that fact.
However, looking at another angle, outgrowing friendships is a sign of a level of maturity. You're becoming aware of your compatibility with others, realizing that there are some things needed to be let go of in order for us to better ourselves. Doing so may help us create a better and healthier relationship with people.
Being the only one that is aware of it explains me rn perfectly and it breaks my heart :(
@@bingbong3392 Yeah. I know how you feel. I've been there before. *pats back*
The thing is I really don't know if the problem is me or my friends. I have a friend group that I've had ever since freshman year and I'm a senior now but lately all my friends ever talk about are guys. It's always about boys and we rarely ever talk about other stuff. I always find myself wanting more in my friendships... I really don't know if this is Envy, Or me outgrowing my friend group. I'm happy that my friends are getting boyfriends but I hate that boys are always our topic now. :(
@@Imakeawesomeeditsforrealomg i relate to this so much, Im a senior as well all and all my friend talks about is guys, and it makes me not want to really talk with her much.. Even when i try to talk about different things she barely puts in effort in the conversation
To be honest I feel like I’ve outgrown pretty much every one of my friendships I just stay friends with them because it’s awkward when I see them everyday at school. I relate to most of the signs
same...I have this friend that doesnt let me go like, she is very toxic sometimes. I just think about a life without her and it gives me this strange type of peace. But i dont want her to be sad, i just wish she wasnt a bad person.
Same here, most ppl from my school ask me if I want to meet up but I’m not interested in them anymore or pretend I don’t know them bc they excluded me then so yeah...
You will soon be out of school and will find a new world out there. Meanwhile balance your time with your current friends and alone time to get to know yourself better and what it is that you seek in friendships. A new life will open up to you.
@@jeansindhikara1823 Your comment gave me peace😭
I’m bisexual and gender questioning and my best friend is VERY against LGBTQ+
And well I’m very introverted and hate hurting peoples feelings but she says what she feels
And I told her I’m bi and she still hates on LGBTQ+ when I’m around
And I told her that I was gender questioning and she said
“Your probably not, I mean you’ve always been a girl”
And I just smiled and nodded my “thanks”
But... friendship is magic 😫👏
Yes! With the right friends :)
But with fake friends... It's hell! I don't wanna even think about them anymore and i wish i could erase that part of my life🙂
During the pandemic, my friends and I kinda just drifted apart :(
-A time traveler
i hope everyone reading this has a successful and amazing life! (readmyname)
I feel you. The pandemic has really soured things, but at the same time reaching out can really weed out which friendship is worth pursuing in the future.
P.S.: great profile picture, by the way.
For me it was the opposite, because we were all away and moving on with our lives, everyone in different cities, but when the pandemic started we became closer through social media, and because we had noone to talk about our problems, we became our only support uwu i suggest u make a group with all your friends, so u can chat of whatever
It’s time for us to raise our standards of who we want to hang out with and be especially careful about becoming emotionally attached to someone.
What if some people force us to be with him.
I can’t find anyone at all T-T
it makes me so so sad when I outgrow a friendship!! But I realized that longevity aka how long youve been friends with someone should not be the only reason to stay friends with them. I have no animosity or hate towards my old friends, it's just we are very very different now. There are still days that I think back to an old memory and I get nostalgic and sad
I was once close to a friend (we were once close like brothers). However, along the way, as I grew and evolved, he didn't. Additionally, he said some nasty remarks that left a sour taste in my mouth. We got to the point where things weren't naturally joyous anymore. I literally felt that I had to walk on eggshells cause he was emotionally immature. We admitted to drifting, but I can't really say he's that best friend I once knew...it is a sad thing
@@tommygunn6901 Same.
I’m going through the same thing.
I realized that I outgrown my friendship with my best friend a long time ago , but the only thing that can’t make me let it go is the fact that we know each other since we were little and all the memories that we have together. Sometimes it breaks me into tears but maybe one day I’ll be strong enough to come to the realization that we’re two different people and we don’t have anything in common anymore.
@@kellis9346 I know exactly how you feel and it really sucks. You just want to hold on so badly and like these were people you’d think would be in your wedding party and future. And I don’t think there’s anything I could have done to keep the friendship together and it’s hard to let go.
@@tommygunn6901 I’m going through the same thing. As time passes, I feel more and more emotionally unsafe talking to this friend. Their way of “comforting” me is not comforting at all. Most of the time I feel like I’m being gaslighted and told my emotions don’t matter. It still hurts tho because I know that their behavior probably comes from their parents’ way of raising them. And I’m struggling to let them go because they feel familiar and I don’t wanna be “left alone.”
This makes me feel so much better. I've been going through a friendship edit for a number of years and because of a misplaced sense of loyalty I continued relationships with people who I've known since childhood even though I really don't have much in common with them anymore. What a relief to move on.
Small friend circles of 3- 4 people are the best ones😊
Fake friends should be distant
,
And it really sucks when you can't even tell those 3-4 people how you feel.
That too can breack and you are left with nothing
@@AyushSingh-cs2kj it does. I feel u
For me small friend groups have more drama cause we’re always with each other. I’m currently taking a bit of a break from my small friend group. I’m not sure if it’s permanent yet but I just know it feels great already. The small friend group had ppl I’ve know for 4 or 5 years but recently I’ve been feeling trapped in those friendships like if I do anything they will stop being friends with me and I’ve been more worried abt that then having fun and being friends with them
Looking back, most of my past friendships ended because we simply stopped calling each other. No big fights or anything dramatic just life moved on and we got too caught up in our own lives
I'm just a simple Time Traveler saying i hope you find true love
HOW
1 week ago ?
Thank u 🥺🌸
Did my friend forgive me?
You’re rupturing the timeline by saying this. Knowing this now, i could still be single.
This video makes me feel less crazy lol. I used to think something was wrong with me because so many friends and I have drifted apart due to lack of compatibility over time.
Glad this video can be a source of validation and empowerment.
"You don't spend time together anymore"...well that applies to almost everyone I know these days, because...you know.
what
@@saoirsestark3903 the virus...
From my experienc, is that, not spending all time thogether somtimes really good thing.
zoom call✨
I've had a friend of 4 years who drifted away from me because we no longer have the same level of connection as from before, and that we have different conflicting values that is no longer beneficial to me and I think it's still beautiful and I don't blame myself for it. Not all friendships last forever, and that outgrowing them is a sign of maturity on your end. ✨
POV: you are confused how everyone is time traveling
How the fuc-
@@ariiyss i hope everyone reading this has a successful and amazing life! (readmyname)
i think it's cuz of patreon early access to videos or smth
how the frick
Don't you get it? This comment is making us confused about how everyone is time traveling.
I’ve had a best friend for my entire life, but lately things have been so different. Even before covid. We never do anything, barely talk and have basically nothing in common anymore. I don’t want to let her go, but it’s probably time to find others.
same
Yup :(
@queenofthemidnightmadness This I understand.
same
this is definitely what am i going through
We all outgrow friendships at some point in our lives, regardless of how close we've been with someone in the past. If you're not sure if it's a phase or the real thing, we've got some clear signs that you can run through.
Love, peace, and chicken grease.
This helped me realize why a previous friend stopped talking to me months and months ago. Thank you for this video
1. Your values conflict 0:54
2. You don't spend time together anymore 1:23
3. You don't tell each other everything like you used to 1:52
4. Things don't feel natural with them anymore 2:24
5. Would you still be friends if you met them today? 2:53
I hope I could help! :)
ty!
Thank you, fellow time traveler!💖💖
Thank you time traveler 😊
Ah what? An early person who doesn’t talk about time traveling? I see that you’re the exceptionally rare
Also thanks!
@@oh-ohstinky5819 uh oh
This video has shown that the friendship that I have with a friend has outgrown. I am going to let the person know and let him go.
I have problems with letting go and still processing my past griefs. What I can take for this is this friend is here to make me learn about the process of letting go. It hurts but I think I can take this step next week.
I see you psych2go, corpse husband drawing on the wall, always making us super comfortable in this little internet space which I love. Thank you for being there for us❤
i hope everyone reading this has a successful and amazing life! (readmyname)
I Hope Everyone Is Safe - Im Sending Virtual Hugs To Everyone Who Needs Them
@@1202-r2c Why the 'readmyname'? That just makes your comment ingenuine.
Time traveler??
Esther Kissoon, How can u do this [1 week ago ], please tell the process
3:20 "sometimes the only thing connecting to people is their past together" that hit different
I think I'm going out of my sibling ship
I feel like the reason the pandemic ended a lot of people's friendships is because
You're interests and joys grew seperarely over a long period of time. It's like meeting a new person at that point
I'm turning 30 next year and although I don't have a lot of friends to begin with, I feel like I've outgrown my remaining set of friends, especially after realizing that they never really cared for what I did or achieved.
How are you doing now? And congrats on your new milestone!
It’s okay if this happens.
I had a friendship that nearly lasted 15 years, we met on the first day of elementary school and we were always together. Over time, we both evolved into to two different people with completely different mindsets, interests and personalities and we had MANY arguments. The friendship turned toxic after time. She always wanted to keep staying friends with me, but I didn’t want her in my life anymore, after a whole lotta arguments and some dumb actions from her part, I decided to cut the bond. She was really petty about it, but I couldn’t care less.
I felt like I had to be friends with her because I knew her for so long, but this shouldn’t be a reason to stay friends with someone, especially not if you’re not feeling good in her company.
Now I definitely know, that it was the best thing to do, after all that, I realized how toxic she was, but I still wish her the best and I don’t hold any grudges for what she had done.
Thank you, yes... Exactly. I am currently coming out of this same situation.
This video is so timely for me as I have just ended a 50 year friendship and am feeling some guilt about it. Understanding that we do not have similar values and that have outgrown her is so helpful to free me up to find people who are more like me!
I just went through a much sadder situation. I met someone in 2020 that really got along with me very well at first. We were fast becoming friends. People saw that we talked like we knew each other 10 years even though we had only knew each other for a few months. But then he started to change, rather quickly. It was very overwhelming because usually this situation would happen over a period of time. This was happening in a period of 6 months. Imagine a 5 year friendship process crammed into 6 months. Finally, a rift in our friendship was created. It was a shocker for me emotionally. I had to go for counseling because the turn of events was too quick. Again, imagine a 5 year situation crammed into a few months. But there was another layer, he was showing signs of mental illness. This explained everything. I found out he lost friends prior to meeting me. He was looking for a new friend. But I realized as long as he is not treating his problems, he will not be able to have friendships.
Going into my early 20s, me & my friends are a lot more busy with work, relationships, & college. I still ask my friends to hang out but even when they’re free it seems like they don’t want to. I try not to take it personal and think maybe something’s going on in their lives. It just sucks when you’re putting in all the effort.
It IS personal though........life happens, but the excuse that there isn't enough time is just that: an excuse
Why is it that with my hectic life I still find the time to reach out to them yet they don't have the means of the same? Because I am not registered as important enough to MAKE time for. Simple as that.
If it is important, people make time. If you are the ONLY one putting in the time and effort then they are blatantly saying you are jot worth the time and effort to them; that's what I finally realized with my own friend group after almost 10 years of being the one to make all the efforts and when finally I stopped reaching out first I stopped hearing from all of them
I've outgrown some friendships, but we still stuck together.
It was always fun to be around with them, and stars align for us to be paired to be a team. We might not be as close but, we'd always be friends
It’s so heartbreaking honestly.
My best friend right now is seemingly becoming more distant as of late, we used to talk and call all the time but now there is nothing.
I want to find other people but nobody ever seems to fit besides what I used to have with my (now distant) best friend.
It's a whirlwind of emotions and life kinda sucks rn ngl
It's hard to be friends with people who have friends that you don't like. You said it best it's all about respect,communication, and trust.
Wow I can’t believe this was posted today.... for this past week I’ve been thinking about how me and my friend are so different now and that i want to make new friends that I can actually be compatible with... :( I guess this is a sign it’s really time to let go...
Thank you for this video 😭
I never thought I needed this information so much 😔
I've recently cut ties with someone I considered my close friend. Every point in this video is true and it's similar from what I've experienced.
For everyone who is reading this, please remember that it's okay to grow and change as a better version of yourself. Do what you think is right, if you don't felt like continuing a friendship.. That is also okay. Friendship should be something that you can grow and learn together as a human. So please remember to prioritize in yourself first..
0:36 I recognize that hairstyle! It’s Twilight Sparkle!!
*Friendship is Magic* ✨
0:49 Celestia 🌟
1:54 Apple Bloom 🍎
2:30 Sunset Shimmer 🌅
3:37 Pinkie Pie ( or Cheerile), Rarity and Fluttershy
3:49 Sweetie Belle and Button Mash
1:54 - dude that's Wilbur
@@ThousandDoodlesikr they have so many Dsmp/Mcyt references it’s amazing it’s like in 34 vids
There are some friendships that last a lifetime. My best friend and I met in our first year of school, and here we are 35 years later still the best of friends. We go out to the pub, catch the newest terrible films, play the latest awful games for the gitz and shiggles, and our wives are basically in the same boat. I wish more friendships could last like that
But sadly it can't considering that our old friends just don't love us anymore.
your very very lucky. 1 in a billion
Gaaayyy lo
I feel like my best friend and I have really lost touch since she's had kids and I'm childfree by choice. Even before the pandemic, we really have nothing in common anymore except a shared past but I am finding it difficult to constantly be the one initiating communication (and being super flexible about times because of the kids) but she never initiates communication. It's like she's forgotten about our friendship.
I experienced this recently. It's really heartbreaking that you feel like you don't know one another anymore and feel like this friend is becoming one of those who contradict you. Thank you for the video, it made clear that what I am going through is normal. I have just need to pass through it as it is just recent. :/
Some people youve met were never meant to be staying in your lives. They are just here to help become a better person, to teach you something meaningful, or just giving you some good memories. Losing a good friend is certainlu painful, but that doesnt mean you can find more along the way.
Going to a different college, the pandemic, and my family moving farther away really opened my eyes and let me realize just how little they truly cared about me. It took a really long time for me to acknowledge that I'd outgrown these people and that they didn't genuinely care for me as a friend. Over like the course of a year I felt this hella slow burn mix of disappointment, jealousy, hurt, and anger towards these people I genuinely cared a lot about and tried to always do my best to help them. It really hurts when you realize your best friends stopped considering you a best friend at some point along the way. I'm trying to let go, but it really doesn't help when one of them happens to transfer to your college lmao. I literally can't escape
There will always be people who will match your energy, you are never alone in this world ❤
sometimes i feel like everyone outgrew my friendship and i’m the one that’s left behind
Sometimes these are good opportunities for you yourself to mature and go in new directions. Your life does not need to stay the same and it's better that new things happen. Explore new places, hobbies, and styles.
I disappear after i know the friendship is not gd but i ll try n see can improve it or not.
@@goldcherriesbeing abandoned by people you cared about and thought cared about you is never a "good thing"......
I already am maturing and changing and growing; I don't need abandonment issues to develope character
The comment sections for these videos always pass the vibe check😌
I think I outgrew my friendship with my best friend.. She's into stuff that I really don't appreciate at all and it seems like we're too different now... I still really like her but she just seems so childish to me? (I'm a bit childish too but in a different way), while she's focused on her k-idols and fanfiction stuff I'm getting annoyed by these things and the things I'm trying to focus on are more on the "preparing for adulthood" side like learning to maintain the house always clean, cooking, trying to get a job, learning to be responsible with money, etc. I really don't think we're that close anymore...
Sorry for the giant comment but since I don't want to tell her this I don't really have anybody else to talk about this to, so thank you for listening.
I get it- I’ve been feeling the same way and it’s been almost an year (also she’s my only friend left from HS)
Once I tried breaking it w her but she just “didn’t let me” , also I’m very shy and couldn’t assert myself (like always) and I just felt like once again I had no other choice than to stay friends w her but the more I’m extending this friendship, the more it feels like a “chore” like replying and hanging out w her feels like a chore. I don’t have any reasons as to why she’s “toxic” , ig we just are - well I don’t vibe w her anymore and maybe I’ve outgrown her
So I totally get what u r saying, I also don’t have anyone whom I can talk abt this . 😶
Also once again I’m going to end this and assert myself more as I cannot do this anymore to myself cuz honestly I’d rather be alone
Might update this comment once it FINALLY ENDS 😩
edit: its been more than a week since it ended- it was super awkward cuz like she cried and i felt guilty after that but ive just come to terms w it cuz its none of us’ faults :/
I mean it sounds like you're maturing a little faster than she is...but then you guys are supposed to be different I mean what's the fun in being the same? But it sounds like her interests are what's annoying you and thats a little unfair; to expect her to be just like you or you can't be friends. Having different interests doesn't mean outgrowing someone I mean if you have a problem with her being herself? She isn't the one with the issue 😉
@@Leoprincess3038 different but it should be complimenting, not a source of annoyance and separation. Sure there are some things that we can compromise to tolerate them and maybe this is not one of them for him/her. I'm in a similar situation however my party is as mature as Me. In fact we are both quite mature for our age.
Me too, and sometimes i question myself if im in the wrong for thinking that way. Maybe theyre not being too carefree, maybe im the one being too serious. But the thing is, i live a relatively carefree life and i am happy, i guess our definition of enjoying life doesn’t align anymore and it hurts :/
I struggle with making friends a lot and the friends that I have don't really feel like friends to me anymore so this video really helped me. Thank you
I have a best friend, and she hasn't been speaking with me a lot.
we have been friends for almost 2 years, she now has many other
best friends, and we barely go to hang our with each other anymore. :(
I'm also afraid she's getting more toxic.
I think my friend has outgrown
our friendship, thank you for telling me!
I have a bestfriend I have known for 7 years but we moved away from eachother 3 years ago and It’s always I who starts the conversation so now I have been waiting in 2 months for her to be the first one who texts but she didn’t do it😔 So same, I also think I have outgrown a friendship :(
I have a bestfriend we've been friends for 5 years but now he's avoiding me lately
I have a bestfriend I had since more than 9 years but since we were torn apart into different classes,met different people and I showed her K-Pop I feel like I don't really know her anymore.A friend who once was happy,cheerful,funny,brave and an open book turned I don't know either...It just feels like she is not even interested in talking to me.Normally she would start conversations and tell jokes ect.Now I'm the one trying to break the awkward silence between us two when I visit her.And so on...
After watching this I thought back to a a friend from kindergarten we hung out every day she came over to my house I went over to hers and we enjoyed each other's company as we grew up we started to get different hobbies,Friends, She got popular I got labeled as the weird kid, We just didn’t really have anything to talk about And then Covid came along and we stopped hanging out all together, she was dear friend to me and Part of me wishes we were still friends, We still have mutual respect one could say, Recently when my dog passed she had heard about it and asked how I was doing and if I was okay because she knew my dog when she was younger and she knew I loved my dog, Really I just hope she dosent forget the fun times we had together when we were little, Thank you for the times we cherished that really what I’d like to say.
I have trusted many people that later screwed me over. I no longer tell anyone anything, even family deaths and how I feel at all. Anyone else feel that way?
Yep ain't no one truly trustworthy.
Yes. I just learned that lesson this month
Yes.
14 years 2 of the best people I've known but I've definitely grown them.
Me and friend have been losing a lot of contact, I feel like she doesnt really care about me anymore. What do I do?😪
Try talking to her about it. Often people don't realize how important they are to us. But also notice if their actions change. If it has been just words -leave them 🙌 if they explain why they do certain things and try making more space for you, gicve it another go (: sometimes, just like romantic relationships, platonic relationships need commitment and change as well
Me too
Try reaching out to her and ask how she’s doing or call her. If she doesn’t answer you or makes time for you, then just let the friendship go. It’s not worth being the only person hanging on if she doesn’t care about your feelings.
same.... :(
..Also, people drift apart and become "Christmas card" buddies, FB "friends" or something like that. It's just how life is.
A lot of my friendships have changed. I’m not really super close to anyone like I used to be. I find comfort within myself now.
I don't have a single friend now. I've seen videos saying "you don't realize that not having any friends right now is a prime time for you because all doors are open for you and you have no one to limit you". And yes, I see that as true. But, knowing I'll be walking through the doors alone for possible years is what hurts me the most.
I had a whole year where I had no friends. One piece of advice stay hopeful and realise anyone and I mean anyone can be your new friend. Even if you don’t like them at first. I didn’t like my two besties till I became friends
@@queenchill6352 It's just so difficult because since I was little I've always lived as someone who lives to keep others happy no matter the sacrifices. Because everyone left, it feels like I didn't do a good job in keeping them happy. I don't want that to happen again, but I also don't know how to stop letting people use me for their benefit since it always keeps a smile on their face. I'm just, hurt and lost. Having hope in all of this is really hard to do. But, thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to read my comment and even give your own comment. Although it's going to be an emotional rollercoaster, I still plan to keep trying. Your comment today helped a lot more than you may think😊
@@narwhalthesnowmanhope you are doing better now mate
I had friends and for the past months, they have outgrown both because they have more interesting moments that can be spent time with their new friends. Tbh, I’ve never felt really connected with them whenever they’re around with those people. I’m slowly distancing myself from them.
The fact youtube does recommend this vid to me at the right time when im feeling that im no longer their best friend.....
It's kinda something that I outgrown my friendships way too shortly that I always cling on to someone for a year or two and this has been going on my whole life
I've been really lonely for awhile since my friends and i kinda drifted apart.. sad to realize i'm not as comfy as i used to with them:(
I was crying so hard, because I was scared of this happening.
2:48 My Little Pogchamp! XD
I really needed this, because I have this friend and we drifted apart too, and every time we did talk for just a little bit I wouldn’t be comfortable because I can’t trust her either. I’ve been thinking about ending the friendship for a while but I just didn’t know how to or to even say the words out because I realized we are really two different people with two completely different mindsets and I feel like I need to move on and find a circle just right for me
It's better to be alone than to be with someone who lowers your vibration. Don't be afraid of being alone. You are connected to the cosmos always. And you will find somebody who shares your values soon enough!
I have friends, since my first memories, memories with them will never change,but now iv never talked to them often,and they don't reply anymore, but my life will never forget them, because, the truth is, I want to make my friends feel loved
Psych2go: Are you currently experiencing a change in friends?
Me with no friends: hmm.. I have my dog
And cat
And u have ur phone , music and this channel UwU
The question is still legit. Is your dog still being a good friend? x)
Haha this should be top comment 😂
Pets never leave C:
i dont wanna become distant w my friends since 7th grade but i realized we dont have anything in common or share some interests anymore
people come and people go
I have been doubting that I am no longer in the friendship and here u made me damn sure about it !! My only friendship died today......only remnants are the formal hi hlos and fake smiles...
Omg I time travelled😳It's my first time travelling experience😆
JAHAHAHAHA same
lol
Welcome, fellow time traveler. My name is Rusaka, nice to meet you! You’re allowed to time travel anytime and anywhere, but there’s one rule: Don’t reveal how to time travel. It takes away the special effect. Enjoy time traveling!💖💖
Mine too ☺️
same
"Drifting apart from a friend is natural, and may even turn into a good thing in the long run"
But I don't wanna lose them. They're like, my happiness
I feel tension from the things I did wrong as far as five years ago. It's been happening since last year and it's draining me although this is a supportive person and fun to be around. I just want to come off of the phone and feel good about myself afterwards though.
Imagine how amazing it is our friend or best friend who understand us the most and knows all of our secrets was a stranger before just as how scary it is to think of one day we might become stranger again...I think friendship is so fragile and vulnerable, that is why it's so valuable :) even though I'm alone now, when I see our pictures or remember our memories, I unconsciously smile alone...
Sometimes it’s like the internet reads your mind, I’m having this exact problem right now
I just changed schools recently and I don't talk to my best friend anymore. We used to live in the same city, but since I moved there's just no chance of us meeting anymore. I found new friends, I'm starting to forget about my best friend and every time I remember that, I cry, realizing I'm forgetting about the person that was once the only one who supported me.
0:03 Dream and corpse posters
1:51 Wilbur poster up top ( I think )
2:47 lol little pogchamp
+ all the mlp references ( there’s to many to count 😳 )
I'm going through this rn and I'm trying so hard to save the friendship but I don't think that's an option anymore and they're making me feel like the bad guy. So watching this helps me feel so much better thank you!
I dumped my best friend because she agreed with a girl who talked shit about me, I dumped her but I contacted her to try and rebuild are friendship. since we talked in school and stuff, she said “I have a new friend group now anyways” I wanted to cry. I felt so alone. it’s so hard to let go even though she was toxic. it’s unfair that she’s doing better while I’m having mental breakdowns every day. life sucks, sometimes it’s hard to live.
I've outgrown almost all my friendships one year ago. It took me a long time to accept it. But it still hurts a lot. I have the feeling that since I learnt to truly love myself and be completely myself with others, I don't know where I belong anymore. I find it so unfair. I thought loving myself would bring joy in my life, not loneliness. Sometimes, I feel it was easier to adapt myself to others.
Finally, I found some people with who I can truly be myself but that's only the beginning. So I often continue to feel alone.
I feel like I have outgrown my friendship with my closest friend but she hasn’t. I don’t know what to do 😥
She misses you
Life can be tough for the many people, especially when they don’t have much connections during their childhood. This not only makes practicing the balance of having a friend difficult, but also can be a huge issue as a person has matured and has lost their commonalities due to having a close relationship for too long (especially if the number of friends are few) solving such a problem can be a big burden on those which stood too long with their few best friends.
i wanna break the friendship with my best friend bc.. reasons, but they’ll literally not be able to move on and.. probably end up dead. and i love them too much to let that happen.
I didn't use to have good boundaries and I would let people disrespect me or just go along with things I didn't really support. Now that I'm standing up for myself, I'm finding that I'm losing friends because they don't really respect boundaries. It is their way or the highway. I'll take the highway.
When you come from an abusive family and live in a predominantly lonely society with no authentic sense of community, sometimes friendships are all you have. The fact that we are seemingly expected to discard people at the drop of a hat over small, superficial differences is demoralizing. I wish there was more emphasis on appreciating others' differences and less energy put into black-and-white thinking about relationships. You don't have to stop caring about someone just because they went down a different career path than you or they got married or started a family and you're single, even if you can't spend as much time together as you once did. You don't have to stop caring about someone simply because they live far away, even if you don't speak as often as you used to. It's ok if these relationships evolve, and it's ok to expand your circle and connect with more people too. You can still keep people in your heart without holding on too tightly.
Obviously, this does not apply to people who become toxic/abusive. It would be extremely detrimental to hold onto these relationships. Best to simply let these people go.
Thank you so much for this video. For a long time, I was concerned every time I noticed that I was gradually losing some of my friends, friends I had known, in some cases, for many years.
Indeed, life is an uninterrupted process of changes, transformations, often subtle, to the point that we hardly notice them, sometimes painful. And the same goes for everyone. The problem is that I often refused to face reality. I persisted in clinging to chimeras, ghosts of the past. To paraphrase C. G. Jung, when someone is too much in our thoughts, when the relationship we have with that person becomes more and more one-way, that is a sign that we are investing too much energy in that person.
As far as I was concerned, having always been of an insecure temperament, the fear of finding myself in front of a great void terrified me. Of course, it could only result in a deep sense of moral distress for me.
Learning to accept change, that others do not belong to us, and to let it go is a completely healthy process and a sign of maturity. The idea is not to blame anyone.
If we wait too long for a door that is closed to us to open, we do not see all the other doors that are already wide open. Cleaning up your backyard is more than just throwing away what is no longer suitable for us. It is also, and above all, making room to integrate new objects that will make us happy.
With simplicity and clarity, you have made me (re)aware of an essential reality of life. For that alone, again, I say a huge thank you.
I was always questioning my friendships and I always thought that I don't belong somehow, but they were my friends since middle school (now I am a freshman) and I had no other friends so I had to let it go.
But with Corona lockdown, I got more time for myself and my family and finally got a chance to slow down and rethink things, yes they are my friends and they are nice, but this relationship is doing me more harm than good, I can't even count how many times I came home after school crying on my bed while they couldn't care less.
After corona and us separating in universities, I realized how we became really different and our interests are really different now.
They are good people, they never meant to harm me on purpose, but it was too many hurtful moments to endure.
But what really broke me was the fact that I've considered our friendship as something greater than they did, I thought we will be friends forever while they had set their mindset that we will break up after high school, so they didn't even put the effort to maintain it.
Now some of them are trying to reach me, but getting away from them made me a lot happier, although I do really miss them every second, but mental health is more important.
I'm going to the same phase right now with my friends group. For a longer time now I don't feel comfortable around them anymore - and they've got much different interests then me - and I'm thinking what's the best way to let them know how I feel about that without burning bridges.
I can see the artist made so much effort in this vid it makes me feel kinda happy