I love how he explained this. I got past my eating disorder, substance abuse problem and abusive relationship; but then I was just left with unadulterated emotional hell, like an eternal sewer of emptiness with the manhole cover removed.
i never got the treatment i should have had, and everything i know, i have discovered through research, so i didn't know at the time that my issue was that i had no sense so self. looking back, i was a chameleon, matching whoever i was with. it wasn't until i finally started college that i finally began to find myself. i excelled at everything, and slowly challenged all my fears head on, proving my negative beliefs to be entirely unfounded each time. i remember a few weeks ago, being in the car with my boyfriend, having the typical argument that used to be the absolute end of the world; he told me like he does when he gets very upset that i would be miserable and alone with my anxiety, and would never achieve my dreams. and for the first time i was able to sit there, unrattled, because I knew myself better. the opinion of another, even my most significant one, was not going to knock me down and mislead me. that was the first time i realized i was going to be ok. never give up, recovery is hard, but it is so possible.
That happens to me too at moments I'm able to react accordingly and appropriately but I don't feel like I recovered or am recovering at all. Its just a moment of some clarity but its a moment, 99% of the time its still a roller coaster ride.
I have Bpd, and I've had friends telling me to just get a job stop making bad choices, that I'm too old for Bull shit, just stop being a victim , and I felt really misunderstood, like even if I tried to explain my anxiety and whatever else I'm feeling like my panic attacks, they just told me that It's because I'm making bad choices etc, I have issues talking to people I'm afraid to be looked at, lots of times I'm afraid to leave the house, and I'm extremely sensitive to criticism, a negative word to me or what I'm doing can make me want to jump off a cliff and I feel like a horrible person, and my self esteem falls to the floor, I get really depressed quickly, I can't control my emotions, I always feel extremely impulsive, I always feel like everyone hates me, I feel empty, like I can't do anything, lots of the time i'd get the impulse to jump in the train tracks, through out the years id get the impulse to cut myself, I always held back but when I got in to a tough situation when I got older I started cutting myself. Struggled not to take more pills than necessary, when it came to relationships, I couldn't trust him my mind would go wild with imagining every worst case scenario, I'd go on a suicide walk in the night down the mountain where wild dogs and boar roam , I just couldn't control my emotions and behavior , relationships are just a disaster, I'd engage in sexually dangerous behavior, I used to chop my hair off when I would get triggered, I would just spend money impulsively and started drinking when I would feel intense feelings, I got thrown out of places for not doing major damage but like breaking a chess board and scattering the pieces everywhere, most guys I've dated always would tell me I'm crazy. In a nutshell, I sometimes wish I were normal.
Ugh, you have been through a lot! If you can wrap your head around the possibility, know that recovery from this condition is possible. If you can grasp this, I hope you’re able to take the next step and seek help from someone with knowledge and trainings out testing bpd. Best of luck to you. Warm hugs.
THANK YOU! You have articulated what’s going on. My behaviour isn’t as extreme anymore, but the core of my thoughts are still following the same pattern, I’ve just attracted less attention to it
Thank you for the video...but sometimes it's incredibly hard not to just give up. The struggle is impossible when you have no idea how to tell anyone without anyone thinking your just a pure psycho. Bpd is not easy...I don't think it'll ever get easier sometimes.
There should be enough understanding people out there who won't judge you, my partner of over 4 years has borderline, we're happy. Edit: 5 years in 7 days ^_^
Hey.... Reading your comment made me sad for you, even though I don’t know you or your situation.... Whatever it is pray to our Lord God/Jesus Christ to help you.... He will heal your pain, and lead you in the right direction.... Have a blessed day.... 🙏🏼❤️ PS.... I just realized this is three years old.... Sorry.... I still hope you’ve found peace and happiness....
This sounds good, mostly. I think some of us would take offense at/be offended by the statement about not having a core set of goals and values. Our goals may change, but many of us are very bulldogish about our goals, and our values are solid and don't change. That's sort of part of the criteria. I'm sure you know that wording like that can set us off, so I thought I'd comment and say this. You sound like a very good therapist, but you can always learn, especially from us. :)
So what exactly is "coherent integrated sense of self"?? I mean I don't have any personality disorder but I love psychology as a hobby and would love to get a proper answer to this question, even better with some examples. Thanks guys, appreciate it.
Balancing your emotional body, mental body, physical body and your spiritual body. Becoming aware of the trauma trapped inside of you and healing those aspects. And, knowing you are spirit having a physical experience will change your life.
@@earthrooster1717 Hearing about borderline, sounds to me like a spirit fighting with other spirits in the same mind, plus sharing the body with other spirits, who can disable you. I don't believe in god nor spirits.
It's fairly self explanatory. You basically don't know who you are, so in effect you have no emotional anchor. As a result, all kinds of things can affect you deeply because you drift with the tide instead of being able to stop and control yourself. In many ways it's an extreme version of that phase many of us go through in our teens and early 20s - we don't really know who we are, so we may experiment with different sets of friends, different types of look and identity etc. while we figure ourselves out and gradually calm down. At that age, we're like a kind of emotional jelly that hasn't set yet. BPD people never do, often with disastrous results.
I wonder if anybody here has done this treatment? It sounds pretty good to me, but I couldn't really find any experiences of patients who underwent it.
I did this kind of therapy twice at a psychiatry at hamburg/germany and it's the best therapy I've ever done so far. No treatment in over 12 years of my personal therapy history was so good and helpful as tfp. I've learned a lot! Going there for a third and final treatment soon!
I love how he explained this. I got past my eating disorder, substance abuse problem and abusive relationship; but then I was just left with unadulterated emotional hell, like an eternal sewer of emptiness with the manhole cover removed.
So what do you do?
Breaks my ❤. Someone I cared for very deeply lost their life to this disease. R.I.P. PH
i never got the treatment i should have had, and everything i know, i have discovered through research, so i didn't know at the time that my issue was that i had no sense so self. looking back, i was a chameleon, matching whoever i was with. it wasn't until i finally started college that i finally began to find myself. i excelled at everything, and slowly challenged all my fears head on, proving my negative beliefs to be entirely unfounded each time.
i remember a few weeks ago, being in the car with my boyfriend, having the typical argument that used to be the absolute end of the world; he told me like he does when he gets very upset that i would be miserable and alone with my anxiety, and would never achieve my dreams. and for the first time i was able to sit there, unrattled, because I knew myself better. the opinion of another, even my most significant one, was not going to knock me down and mislead me. that was the first time i realized i was going to be ok.
never give up, recovery is hard, but it is so possible.
That happens to me too at moments I'm able to react accordingly and appropriately but I don't feel like I recovered or am recovering at all.
Its just a moment of some clarity but its a moment, 99% of the time its still a roller coaster ride.
I have Bpd, and I've had friends telling me to just get a job stop making bad choices, that I'm too old for Bull shit, just stop being a victim , and I felt really misunderstood, like even if I tried to explain my anxiety and whatever else I'm feeling like my panic attacks, they just told me that It's because I'm making bad choices etc, I have issues talking to people I'm afraid to be looked at, lots of times I'm afraid to leave the house, and I'm extremely sensitive to criticism, a negative word to me or what I'm doing can make me want to jump off a cliff and I feel like a horrible person, and my self esteem falls to the floor, I get really depressed quickly, I can't control my emotions, I always feel extremely impulsive, I always feel like everyone hates me, I feel empty, like I can't do anything, lots of the time i'd get the impulse to jump in the train tracks, through out the years id get the impulse to cut myself, I always held back but when I got in to a tough situation when I got older I started cutting myself. Struggled not to take more pills than necessary, when it came to relationships, I couldn't trust him my mind would go wild with imagining every worst case scenario, I'd go on a suicide walk in the night down the mountain where wild dogs and boar roam , I just couldn't control my emotions and behavior , relationships are just a disaster, I'd engage in sexually dangerous behavior, I used to chop my hair off when I would get triggered, I would just spend money impulsively and started drinking when I would feel intense feelings, I got thrown out of places for not doing major damage but like breaking a chess board and scattering the pieces everywhere, most guys I've dated always would tell me I'm crazy. In a nutshell, I sometimes wish I were normal.
It's tough.
Ugh, you have been through a lot! If you can wrap your head around the possibility, know that recovery from this condition is possible. If you can grasp this, I hope you’re able to take the next step and seek help from someone with knowledge and trainings out testing bpd. Best of luck to you. Warm hugs.
THANK YOU! You have articulated what’s going on. My behaviour isn’t as extreme anymore, but the core of my thoughts are still following the same pattern, I’ve just attracted less attention to it
he gives the best perspective in his descriptions and explanations from what I have researched on so far...
Thank you for the video...but sometimes it's incredibly hard not to just give up. The struggle is impossible when you have no idea how to tell anyone without anyone thinking your just a pure psycho. Bpd is not easy...I don't think it'll ever get easier sometimes.
There should be enough understanding people out there who won't judge you, my partner of over 4 years has borderline, we're happy.
Edit: 5 years in 7 days ^_^
@@Siberius- edit 9 years?
a great video, a great doctor! thanx a lot for sharing
yes it is really hard to navigate through your life without a coherent self identity
What a smart guy !
good video ✅
Watching this I cried. Made me realise how completely messed up I am. Holy crap I need to do something 😕
Hey.... Reading your comment made me sad for you, even though I don’t know you or your situation.... Whatever it is pray to our Lord God/Jesus Christ to help you.... He will heal your pain, and lead you in the right direction.... Have a blessed day.... 🙏🏼❤️ PS.... I just realized this is three years old.... Sorry.... I still hope you’ve found peace and happiness....
@@ilovejesus2290 Why this Jesus allowed BPD to happen to innocent children in the first place?
@@TomeRodrigo , don’t blame Jesus! Blame the people that did it.... It’s called free will.... 🙏🏼❤️
This sounds good, mostly. I think some of us would take offense at/be offended by the statement about not having a core set of goals and values. Our goals may change, but many of us are very bulldogish about our goals, and our values are solid and don't change. That's sort of part of the criteria. I'm sure you know that wording like that can set us off, so I thought I'd comment and say this. You sound like a very good therapist, but you can always learn, especially from us. :)
That sounded insanely narcissistic :) Probably why you have "solid values".
@@Nobody-Nowhere Thanks for showing the world how people with BPD are treated.
@@trilliance touché 👍
help me understand, when they hurt you so much,
So what exactly is "coherent integrated sense of self"?? I mean I don't have any personality disorder but I love psychology as a hobby and would love to get a proper answer to this question, even better with some examples. Thanks guys, appreciate it.
Balancing your emotional body, mental body, physical body and your spiritual body. Becoming aware of the trauma trapped inside of you and healing those aspects. And, knowing you are spirit having a physical experience will change your life.
@@earthrooster1717 Hearing about borderline, sounds to me like a spirit fighting with other spirits in the same mind, plus sharing the body with other spirits, who can disable you. I don't believe in god nor spirits.
It's fairly self explanatory. You basically don't know who you are, so in effect you have no emotional anchor. As a result, all kinds of things can affect you deeply because you drift with the tide instead of being able to stop and control yourself. In many ways it's an extreme version of that phase many of us go through in our teens and early 20s - we don't really know who we are, so we may experiment with different sets of friends, different types of look and identity etc. while we figure ourselves out and gradually calm down. At that age, we're like a kind of emotional jelly that hasn't set yet. BPD people never do, often with disastrous results.
It means they don’t know who they are
@@th8257Never? :(
Do you think DBT is an effective way to learn skills so you can retrain your brain to handle the difficulties of BPD and possibly overcome them?
😲😲😲 did me guy meet me before? 💯
Emotions
Behavior
Sense of self
I wonder if anybody here has done this treatment? It sounds pretty good to me, but I couldn't really find any experiences of patients who underwent it.
I did this kind of therapy twice at a psychiatry at hamburg/germany and it's the best therapy I've ever done so far. No treatment in over 12 years of my personal therapy history was so good and helpful as tfp. I've learned a lot! Going there for a third and final treatment soon!
Woops, I commented to the therapist and not Amanda. Sorry, Amanda, but maybe you know what I mean. :)
Everyone wants to label and put a title on shit