Should you be homeless with your man?
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- Опубликовано: 18 окт 2024
- Show Notes:
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Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!
14:43 - I'm with Yvette, because 3 years together and y'all are HOMELESS?!? How did that even happen??
19:25 - WHEW 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾!!! Beleaf took the words RIGHT out of my mouth, because how you ain't got a pot to piss in, but wanna be the head of the household?! Baby, he needs to pick a struggle, and PRONTO!
You guys should really do a segment where the people who have sent emails have a chance to tell how the situation turned out eventually, atleast the people who didn't want to be anonymous. Because situations like this & other episodes I'm so invested to see the outcomes! lol
Yess!! We need a follow up! Great idea!
Lol I love Glen’s reaction any time the husband isn’t working. Exactly. Unacceptable! 😂
Wow! “Your children are going to benefit from your obedience.”
“Who you choose is a legacy move.”
Jesus, thank you for this word.
Ohhhh boy. Could not be me. I’m not leaving my parents home for uncertainty. It’s expensive out there and I like my bed.
“He details” might mean that he details car on the side.
This episode was such great detail on realistic expectations to have for your significant other.
As a woman navigating dating, I've realized that at the end of the day we have to take our feelings out of the equation and look at the facts. Especially in the beginning we MUST stop with the fairytale love.
The daddy issues are creeping in because they are babies, shes only 21!!! I consider that young minded.
He couldn't possibly be attentive or anything else she said positive because hes not working and is not confident in himself.
The need for constant reassurance is draining and childlike.
He tried to marry you because he knows you'll sit there and take care of him.
Before your lease breaks, start moving your yhjngs back eith your parents and leave that man right there. DO NOT RENEW!! LEAVE!!! STOP BEING SO HARD PRESSED ABOUT SOMEONE NOT EVEN HARD PRESSED ABOUT THEMSELVES!!
18:51 I commend her for reaching out to y’all because she’s obviously sick of being sick and tired. I pray she’s listening with an open heart and mind. It’s unfortunate that she’s isolated from her family because of her decision to be with him. And what did he propose to you with????
Be courageous!
She should go home. Hopefully her parents are willing to take her in.
I was wondering the same thing!! If he doesn’t have a job what did he propose with?? 😭
This episode is going to help so many women and couples in how to navigate (or not!) relationships! Yvette, thank you for being vulnerable in sharing your story about how broken promises is the origin story behind your timidity. This episode was revelatory!
As a dude I dated potential for 4 years and now I’m a fraction of myself. As soon as I got out of that relationship opportunities immediately opened up for me. I didn’t have to figure out problems that weren’t really mine anymore. I can focus on preparing for college and building what I have. Do not waste your life over a person. What’s worse than the feeling of loneliness or heartbreak is regret and you will realize your net loss of your identity and your own potential once you leave the relationship.
I'm proud of you. Keep going!
Thank you for not sugar coating it. She needs to take her time to figure out who she is first. Because she will repeat this situation into the next relationship. Go home.
I felt this episode so much. I was married to a man who had major anger issues, was verbally and emotionally abusive. I was constantly on guard when we were in public because I never knew what would be the final straw to set him off. I lost so much of myself during the four years of marriage. Therapy and Jesus are helping me turn the page. Sis, I hope you take their advice and go back home to your parents because you do deserve better.
I am all for trying to work things out in a realtionship, but GIRLLLLAHHHHHHHH....RUNNNNNN ! Like yesterday RUN. You are settling for someone who is not worthy of your love. Tell him peace and blessings & take care LOL. PLEASE don't let him guilt trip you into staying. No ma''am. no ham, no turkey. RUN.
MA'AM RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN. Understand this, you need protection from him the most.
Details cars?!?! I am guessing is what she meant.
Yes
When I was young, between about 8-11 I would go fishing with my dad and brothers. I hated it. Didn't like worms or the wiggly fish. BUT, I went because I loved being with my dad and brothers on the boat. I told him a year or so ago. (I am in my 50's). He said he wish I had said I didn't like fishing, he would have let me stay home with our mom. I told him that wasn't the point. I wanted to go with him. That sounds kind of like what Anya is doing.😀 Have a great day!
This episode was FIRE.
I Hope she takes this advice and RUNS with it!
Y'all gave just the right amount of firm and love in your delivery 👏🏽
She was saying he does "detailing" to make money. He may detail cars for income but its not consistent and a full time job. The advice is still warranted, she needs to leave this man. Go home! Perfectly said.
Ugh I was in a similar situation. Just leave . Before you have kids ! Why? Because if it’s meant to be it will come back around . Meet with him again when he has a job and personal stuff to be proud of FOR HIMSELF . ….. if you weren’t with him how would he eat? How would he get toilet paper ? Let him level up ON HIS OWN or at least without you
You can do bad all on your own -meaning why be in a relationship and homeless when you can be single and NOT homeless ? Ain’t no romance without finance . Doesn’t mean each person has to be rich but we live in a society where money matters a bit .
And he as a man is taking advantage of the fact that you are choosing love over STABILITY AND SECURITY .
Big advice!!! Ladies please listen to this. Also, the living together etc. is likely not in line wi their faith. Also listen to the wisdom and guidance of people in your family who love you and want the best for you. Parental instincts are important and valid. Elders have been there and they don’t want you to make the same mistakes.
Been there. I would not do it again or choose someone who would ask me to risk EVERYTHING on nothing worthy.
This is man the most basic explanation of how living with a narcissist looks like
It's sad yes but.. the fact that Anaya's finding her voice and her confidence in speaking her mind, sharing her genuine thoughts is a very beautiful thing.
I love how Beleaf is giving tough love advice to the young lady. I agree. You're setting him up for the next. It made me think of the song by K. Michelle, can't raise no man. Great advice.
It’s been a year since I escaped a very similar situation. They’re speaking alllllll facts. Best episode Ive watched.
“Who you choose is the legacy move” That was so DEEP!!!
I wish we had young people with deep thinking, and understanding! Our world would be a better place!
Thank you for sharing with us your amazing work!
Glen holds no punches. But you gave great advice. Run back to your mommas house. Literally. Go back and spend sometime diving deep in the self esteem issues that made you feel like staying was an option.
If he isn't working now, being manipulative now what is going to happen when your married ?? This is a BONDAGE RING, he is giving you that ring to keep you in place
Much needed wise counsel was provided to the young lady who wrote in. I truly pray that her eyes are opened and she chooses herself over him.
17:29 whew 😮💨😮💨😮💨. Coming from someone who is already there, he is 1000% correct. The me I was years ago, before I met him, would look at me like I was not only a stranger, but the dumbest woman alive lol. I’ve lost so much of myself. I dropped out of school, was unable to go back to work after having my son, and it was always a problem when I worked afterwards, and I lost my car. I’m a ghost.
Before reading this, I was thinking about emailing you guys, but my email would just be a piggyback off this one. Getting away when it’s been years, and you’ve been worn down, and stupidly had a kid together. I hope she listens to you guys and the commenters
I love this episode and the vulnerability of Glen as a creative. “I can’t run if you keep holding on” that hit me as a single woman who is a creative. The accountability to myself to let go and run…. Thank You Fam😢!
I am not a commenter at all but this episode was absolutely wonderful. The advice you gave to the writer was all the way the truth. Something that every relationship can gain a take away from. I just loved it! The both of you just radiate black love and it is so very beautiful and admirable. Keep doing what you do, keep being vulnerable, transparent and full of Him! Stay blessed!
13:22 sounds like a verb in terms of “detailing” vehicles, but you need equipment for that: vacuum, solution, wipes, cleaning agents, water, potentially wax. I’m confused Sis.
“A LEGACY MOVE!” BARSSSSS! Ok? Bars!
To the woman who wrote this: look up covert narcissism and vulnerable narcissism and see if you're whole relationship with this man makes sense. Leave him; all narcissists are abusers in some form or another. PLEAAAASE, GET OUT!
Not Glen saying the funds are low so get in front of the camera!! 😂😂😂😂 funny
I'm so glad you reminded us to hit the like button... I watch all the time and forget the like button.... I love this podcast!
I truly enjoyed this episode, and it brought me out my "quiet" listening to comment. It hit hard when Glen said, "This is a legacy move!"
I am not a commenter - BUT - I LOVED this conversation and you speaking on how LOVE helped the growth of your relationship!!! Keep up the GREAT work!
Beleaf.....You just helped me so much with your wisdom. Recently my husband told me about a plan he has for our family and I have not been fully on board. The decision has been so difficult for me to accept. We are in a tough season. I just received so much clarity from you when you spoke about worrying about your wife's comfort instead of making the decision you know to be best for the long run for your family and business. I need to trust who I chose to lead my family more. I'm just scared and my fear definitely has the potential to deter his decision making processes.
Yvette.....a few videos ago(I don't remember the episode number, I have been binge watching) you mentioned being mindful of trusting in God first and relying on God more than you rely on your husband (although you trust and rely on Glen as well). My faith has been boosted and you both helped me in my current mindset so much. You don't even know how much. I truly love this podcast! I also remember you mentioning how you didn't realize non believers benefit from your ministry. I am a muslim woman and we believe similarly and I have been benefiting so much from this podcast. Thank you both so much
I wish I could like this episode 2x! All the advise is right and I hope she takes the advise given to her from them and the people in the comments because this type of relationship is not it! He will resent you for trying to do better and try to make you feel guilty. You deserve so much better at least you deserve your peace, trust it’s better to be alone.
I absolutely love the covering that Glen provided to Yvette during that moment in this episode. God was speaking through you guys and dropping GEMS! This episode was really good and also humbling. It reminded me of how when you are on the outside of a relationship the red flags are so clear, you have a Birds Eye view of everything but when you are the one in the situation or relationship it’s like you have blinders on. God help us and help this young lady. Give her strength to make the best decision for her and the calling you have on her life.
This is a great example of two mature adults having an honest conversation! I love you guys....
When Glen said “what is it good for” my immediate response “absolutely nothing! Say it again now !”
Great advice I can’t remember if the writer gave her age. I kept wondering these has to be young adults like 20-23 yrs old. Y’all gave her some good and honest advice. Ladies can definitely love on potential but what happens when the potential turns out to be lazy or manipulative you gotta know when to hold ‘em or kno when to fold ‘Em. And it’ll hurt but life goes on baby.
I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking about the song ♪♪😂😂
Glen just dropped so much wisdom in the 11th hour. The writer of this letter needs to give him an offering and heed this advice. Who you marry is life or death.. I hope she heeds this stern warning.
Yvette, you said it girl. RUN. Run like your behind is on FIRE!!!!. Sistah, SAVE YOURSELF. "Who you choose is a legacy move" Priceless!!!!!....
18:57 ABSOLUTELY ! and she may not wanna hear it but the next man you’re with you need to value yourself so high that he has to meet your needs
Great advice, she is too young to be in this predicament. Him not working is the ultimate disrespect but the fact that he proposed to her is super manipulative. He proposed to keep her around. If he got on his feet, he would likely leave her because she has excepted him at such a low point and when he comes up, she’ll be too much of a reminder of how low his life was.
Yes ! Men will value you the way you value yourself .
Great episode!! when I heard "he DETAILS to bring in income," I understood that to mean that he details cars [interiors] 🚗
This conversation was so powerful that it inspired a much needed discussion between my husband and I. There was greater understanding on both sides afterwards and we’ve been married 17 years.
I have a similar experience to Yvette with my well intentioned dad being unable to fulfill the promises made to my sisters and I.
My husband’s entrepreneurial spirit definitely triggered some of that unresolved trauma that I did not realize was still so prevalent.
My husband’s approach in not conveying his goals and plans in these endeavors created a huge divide.
He took the stance that I was being unsupportive while I was resentful that I was expected to support something that was not fully communicated to me.
This podcast sparked a much needed conversation and greater understanding on both parts. Thank you for your transparency, emotional intelligence and ability to communicate so effectively with your audience. This podcast is truly a treasure.
Other people's calling are not yours......married....single......etc. sometimes we have to step into our own calling and let our partner do theirs and come together otherwise
I’m with G, stop stop stopppppp 😭😂 so many flags on the play
3:34 What’s cool is that due to the removal and slow down of BIF videos, it’s allowed room to move creatively in other passion projects! Glad to see videos will be coming back.
This was an awesome episode!! Yvette, I’m right there with you and this is growth, don’t beat yourself up.
TD Jakes and his wife taught a series called model homes a few years ago that touched on roles in the household.
I think as women we should be less resistant to our role if it happens to be more domestic than our husbands. If I am the person who has the time to shop, cook, clean etc. than that is how I should be serving my family. When we focus less on gender and more on who has the bandwidth to get ABC done, the home will flourish. When I decided to stop complaining about why I was the person to do this or that everything changed for the better.
I’m glad I’m newly a part of the wedding party. I’m no longer married, but I love watching your videos.
He must DETAIL CARS 🚘!
This was such a good episode....I loved how Glen spoke from the heart to this young lady....it felt like it was his sister/niece he was speaking to. I felt his anger...Yvette I understand where you are coming from.with the comparison but that please remeber you have a loving husband who is doing everything in his power to provide and protect you and the children. You are on the right path and you already have abundance is so many ways. Finances are so much better than they were and they will continueto increase. ❤
Yvette, not to take anything from you, Glen is very smart also. He loves his family, and he will do anything to protect you guys and to keep you covered. What a blessing! I am hooked on your episodes and can't wait until I see the next one. I appreciate the seeds you always plant in my heart. Thank y'all for sharing your lives with all of us.
Big hugs to all of you,
K. Ford❤
You know imma admit, I always forget to like the video because I am typically multitasking or listening off of RUclips. I went back and liked a bunch! Imma do better cuz I love yall and it's such an easy way to support. Now let me listen to this episode
Love that y’all kept it real with her!
This episode is a gem 💎
Requirements: be sturdy lmaooo throwback 2020 ❤
This episode right here!!!! My God.
This was an amazing discussion with accurate conclusions. BRAVA & BRAVO!!!👏👏👏
These episodes are so thoughtful and insightful. They give so much value.
This relationship reminds me of the dynamic in my relationship and I’m sooo happy I’ve seen this episode tonight.
..... I can't even know what to say. 😮😮
I think this is a good example for you both and the children to realize that feelings change. It’s okay to change your feelings. I believe they wanted to have the videos down to process their feelings on that many people watching them. That’s new info they haven’t fully come to terms with yet. I think through their own thoughts and life experience they now have a different perspective. And that should be rewarded. They were clear on their boundaries and let you know when they had changed. Even if it does take a while, they’ll learn how to process and communicate these things better with time. Just have to meet them where they are. I studied Child Development and Family Studies
Y'all don't miss with these discussions... gave me something to reflect and think about
39:00 to the very end gave me goosebumps! It’s about legacy 👏🏾
COME ON 198!
oh y’all…
36:33 SPEAK and AFFIRM yo’ man Yvette!! This is soooo true for men and women cuz we say “I trust you” but it’s not blanketed over all issues and situations. So good!
PREACCCCHHHH! Omg this episode was so good! Thank y’all so much!💜
Checking in from the DMV.
Glad this episode to the turn that it did. 2nd half had me so emotional. 😢❤
I wish i could like this episode multiple times
You two are beautiful. I'm tearing up
Glen’s How Married Are You gave me happy tears! ❤️
Good advice to the young lady, I hope she heard you.
I hope this girl takes your advise!
I have to say your episodes are always so relatable in so many ways. My hubby is an entrepreneur type and I'm absolutely not. It's always scared me to death because it feels unstable. But I've learned to let go of that fear to some extent. And he's also worked a full time job while working on his pursuit that he loves
I would love to know what are the conversations are like after the podcast because y’all get to know or better understand each other in Each podcast
This got deep
I pray she lets go!
That is abuse, abuse, abuse. He does not respect you. Seek God first, ask Him is this man for me. And fleeeeeee!!
24:32 I felt that I’m angry. 😂
❤🎉😊 I am super excited the babies are back! They put such a smile on my face. I am single/no kids but adore all content about your family!
Wow this episode spoke to me. Thank you.
Don't worry Yvette. My little one and have come to the realization that we don't like the beach either. I love the site and sound of it and love to sun bath. I like to ground with sand. We both don't feel safe in open water and prefer swimming in pools. We are both great swimmers that find safety in not having to worry about rip tides, jelly fish and sharks. My husband and daughter love the oceans salt water. My daughter stays near to the shore but loves to go to the beach at night and watch the sunrise and do yoga. My husband causes me an uncomfortable amount of anxiety when he's in the ocean because he like go and stay out in water up to his chin, I hate going to the beach with him because I can never relax to read a book or take a nap because I'm in life guard mode just in case he has an issue 🙄
25:00 hahahaha my thoughts exactly beleaf lol two different relationships lol
I absolutely loved this episode ❤️ thank you
You guys are so awesome!
I wonder if you tried it like this would it roll off the tongue easier "my name Beleaf this is Yvette we married one three years...."
Loved everything about this episode❗️❤
🎯😀Stellar Episode!!
He probably details vehicles
I Really loved this episode!
15:40 he ain’t sturdy!
This one HIIITTTTT!
Agreed!
* He datails Cars
Detailing as in auto Detailing