Hey everyone hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts? Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 3 Steps to Heal Yourself after a Toxic Relationship Ends (Warning: Spots are limited) 🗒 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> www.healyourheart.school/webinar 🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> www.healyourheart.school/guide 💕 Apply For Heal Your Heart School Here! www.healyourheart.school/call
I was broken up with because I battle with depression. I’ve spent years learning how to manage it in therapy and never took it out on anyone. One day I had an off day and shared how I was feeling (doubtful a little suicidal) but I managed it and I even spent a few days in nature to recenter myself and I was better. Because she had past trauma with dealing with a relative that deals with depression she thought I was exactly like her and that I would hurt myself. I was put in a box and was not even given a chance. It was a great connection but she decided she didn’t want to deal with me even though I didn’t need her help.
@@LoveByDesign Sometimes when a guy has come from a secure attachment Ex and goes into a relationship with an anxious woman, he initially thinks he’s in heaven until she starts being hyper vigilant about the relationship. If she has toxic best friends they may induce her to sabotage the relationship. That happened to me 8 months ago. I’m in NC. I was no saint (I flirty type ) but 80% of the relationship was excellent. I can’t take her back if she rebounded or cheated. I’m dating again after 6 month healing. I’m fitter, wealthier and told I look good 👍
This was so incredibly helpful and insightful. Sadly, I became a widow 11 months ago at just 40 years old when my husband (who I had been with for 22 years, since I was only 18) passed away very suddenly and unexpectedly from sepsis. Never in my life did I expect to become a widow at such a young age, nor did I ever think I'd find a love like that again. However, almost 3 months ago, I met an AMAZING guy on a dating app who lives just 25-30 minutes from me. Ironically, he is originally from the same state as my late husband and only moved here about 7 years ago after his divorce. We talked on the phone and texted for approximately a week before we went out on our first date. Our first date was AMAZING. It could not have gone any better. We immediately felt so comfortable with each other and spent a majority of the time laughing until we were crying. Before we knew it, we had spent about 8 hours together and it felt like no time had passed at all because we were both having such an amazing time. We definitely had and instant connection and felt like we had known each other for years. He's 16 years older than me, but the age gap doesn't bother us at all. He is retired from nearly 30 years of working in law enforcement and I was a paramedic for many years, so we have fairly similar career backgrounds as well as many similar interests and other things in common. Ever since our first date, we have spent nearly every single weekend together going out of town and spending 2-3 nights in hotels and just having the most amazing time together. The only 2 weekends that we didn't get to spend together were the weekends right after his 19-year-old dog passed away and the weekend right after his mother passed away, which were within 2 weeks of each other. However, a week after his mother's passing and immediately after her funeral several days ago, he drove the 3 hours back home to meet up with me and spend the weekend together, showing up at the hotel still in his suit from the funeral. I feel like we had bonded on a much higher level at this point as I had been there to support him as his mother was in hospice at the end of her life and when he had to put his dog down. He told me that I am truly a blessing in his life, and I told him that I feel the same way about him. Now, because my late husband and I rushed into a relationship 23 years ago and had moved in together after only dating for about a month, I somehow feel that is what needs to happen here, which I KNOW it doesn't. We don't even have any labels for our relationship yet and neither of us have come right out and said "I love you" yet, but we have both definitely hinted at love in some of the memes and reels that we text each other that talk about love, so I feel like we are at least progressing in a normal and healthy manner for this stage in our relationship. I know that you can't develop a full-blown relationship in only 3 months and that you really need to take things slow and steady, which is becoming harder and harder for me because I have REALLY fallen hard for this guy and I just can't imagine myself with anyone else. I literally CANNOT stop thinking about him and I'm sad when I'm not able to be with him during the week. I'm bursting at the seams to tell him I love him, but I don't want to risk scaring him away, so I'm holding back a bit longer. I think he knows, but I'm not going to risk saying it too soon, unless of course he says it first, in which case I will obviously reciprocate, because I DO love him and deeply care about him. I often wonder how I've ever lived my life without him up until these last few months. When I'm with him, I feel like I'm home and feel such a sense of peace and happiness. I feel like I can be my true, authentic, raw self with him, which he has said he loves about me - that he can tell I'm being myself and not putting up a front or being fake. When you mentioned stage 4 about being more sensitive to less times of communication, that is EXACTLY what I'm going through right now. Even though we text every single day, at least every morning to say good morning, when there are days when I don't hear from him as much, I start feeling insecure, which I KNOW I have no reason to feel as he has been SUPER consistent the entire time we've been dating, so that is definitely something that I'm trying to work on.
I'm old school, but my natural personality is a friendly one, so it's very easy to start a conversation with anyone. Because I'm old school, I will not share my feelings outright with a man whom I find myself interested in. I still feel that men like being the hunters and they love catching their prey. Thank you for sharing some interesting information though❤
Interestingly in stage 4 I've always felt betrayed when the person was dating another person. Particularly because the person didnt disclose it to me beforehand and I thought I was the only person. Interesting hearing you talk about it from a different perspective. Also didnt know dating is different from being in a committed relationship.
And it can come back to us - we need to communicate and ask questions before we assume anything (that can lead to "betrayal"). And the difference between dating and committed relationship comes down to the level of communication you engage in to discuss and define the container, this is just a guide.
These videos are so helpful. I recently had an experience where a second date got somewhat physically intimate and my date love-bombed me and is now pulling way back, probably because he feels embarrassed and vulnerable. I feel like I’m on an emotional roller coaster. I like what you said about push/pull and waiting to see if they initiate. I previously would have thought that pulling back would be petty, but it seems like a good way to gage interest.
Soubds like you would need to be the one to reinitiate, if you are the one that refused the advance. He made an offer, you rejected it, then he withdrew his offer. Now it's up to you to make a counteroffer. That's how I see it. Just let him know somehow that you are ready for what he is offering, the bedt way is to offer it to him
That was SO helpful! I have watched many videos about relationships and so on but this one hits deeper. I dont know what that is but your words and advice get me right in the spot. I finally admitted to myself that I have attachment issues. I am not a clingy person, I give space to the other just because I don't want to be annoying but the truth is I am dying inside thinking of them too much and expecting them to behave in a certain way. I met a guy that seems to be very respectful and could be someone more that's why I see I need to step back a little bit and set some boundaries when it comes to my attachment and mutual physical desire. Damn, never thought it would be so hard!
And don't forget that while you're dating if they do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or unhappy simply say to that person you know I don't feel too comfortable with this and or I don't feel happy about this this makes me feel unhappy and see how they respond but always be honest about your own feelings don't say I don't like the way you're treating me because you're unhappy now you're angry and you act angry, just simply say say how you feel and keep it with your own personal feelings like I don't like the way I feel about this, or I feel that we're going too fast and we need to slow down I barely know you things like this don't let a man push you or have you do anything it makes you feel uncomfortable State how it makes you feel uncomfortable. Don't let him push you into anything you don't like and don't get mad and say you're pushing me no just State how it makes you uncomfortable and it does not make you happy and then decide what you need to do during that time regarding his response whether it's walk away or accept his apology and see if it goes better but also never put yourself in a situation where you're alone at a man's home when you're just getting to know him or at his apartment but anywhere alone keep it out in the public when you're trying to get to know someone
This is incredibly enlightening and helpful! As a 20 years old dating only recently, I had so many mistakes, try to analyze and read a lot afterward. Yet this video sum it up really well with highly insightful details (mentioning physical self-care), tiding to logical reasoning (like chemical and psychological behind dating). This doesn't make me feel bad about myself and all the mistakes I made. Yet it helps me gain clarity and empathy to improve.
This is very interesting. I like the overall goal of looking for the give and take; I feel like it brings purpose to the old rules of dating and a useful perspective on the whole exercise.
I really do love your video. Having come out of my divorce it's been tough getting my feet back under me. Your video has helped me. I'm looking forward to meeting my future partner in time.
Hello Amy i just discovered your video and thus channel and i am so grateful. Your knowledge and advice is exactly what i needed to hear and i wish i knew when i first started dating at 18. I am excited to watch all your videos and learn as much as i can in order to increase my self worth build strong foundation for myself in order to attract to right man to build a beautiful relationship and life with. Thank you again 🙏🏻
your channel is absolutely brilliant and is bringing so much clarity and value...! i hope more people will discover you soon, thanks so much for what you do...! 🙏
I really love how you express yourself, I think you're beautiful (in a friendly way!). Your video are so pertinent to my life and based on my own life experiences until now, I can see there is so much truth in this. Thank you for sharing the wisdom !
Why would the female have to say she wants to see him more? If he wanted to see her shouldn’t he say or do? If he was enjoying you, you shouldn’t have to ask…it should be his desire
Because communicating our needs is the only way our needs can truly be met. Yes, we can also observe their behaviour and notice their interest in us (this is a part of discernment), and if they don't appear to be interested, that is helpful info that he maybe isn't interested :)
My recent dating has gone extremely well because it seemed like both of us were on the same page about moving forward and continuing to see each other and date. This is a two way street and I want to hear her say she wants to see me again just as much as she want to hear me say it I’m sure, heck at least agree if I bring it up. But it’s nice when both are working to meet up. It’s felt a lot more real
I dated two times in my life, one 2005 one in 2016. I agree my mom talk boundaries with me and my sibling. Im being patience in God with his time not ours but God time.
Only thing I noticed is the phrasing of push pull. Instead maybe give and take? I know that narcissistic manipulation is described as "push pull" which means more than having a balance of mutual taking turns pursuing. It implies the ghosting or silence etc during any stage between two people. Otherwise great video, thank you.
I've heard that phrase used in narcissistic circles too. But give/take is not a good substitute. Push/pull describes to many aspects to the "dance", hopefully my audience that has past trauma can discern the new meaning when I teach it. And, you're welcome 🙏
Although I would like to go out for friendship obly, I can't do it honestly with some people. Sometimes I feel romantic about the person from the beginning, and trying to hide it while "being just friends" sound like hell. What then? I shouldn't date them at all?)
I can't really give you an exact timeline. Stage 1 takes as long as you need to get clear on what you need and feel ready to attract that. Stage 2 when you're meeting people takes as long as it takes until you find someone you want to move to Stage 3 with. Stage 3 leads to Stage 4 naturally when you both get on the same page about your goals/values etc (or don't, and then things end). Stage 5 can come after a few months or much longer - it really is up to both people as to when they want to define things as a relationship. Does that help?
@@LoveByDesignHow long do you think a man who has options and uses them to his advantage but has serious intentions with you would be willing to wait before you decide to get in a relationship with him and give it up?
Yeah I knew I was always head over heels every time I met someone I liked hahaha, very unhealthy, I basically rushed thru the stages and then felt jealous and rejected 😂😂😂😂
I like some of these but if ir dating and not boyfriend and girlfriend u should focus on other people unless u have the official title of boyfriend or girlfriend which is a relationship. Also if it's been as long as a month and they haven't spent the night I just friend zone them. I can't take them seriously enough in a romantic way or even a dating way
Also I just got dumped from a guy I saw as long as a year that I loved with a full heart. I'm on month two but I feel to fragile with my mental and emotional health to date right now. I'm on month 2 of being single I'm thinking of putting myself out there again at the end of October just because the holidays are coming up. I'll redue my profile then. right now I'm working on platonic friendships
Amy, all of the things you cover are relevant but the minute a man discussed boundries with a potential partner he's referred to as controlling. However if the woman talks of boundries its viewed as healthy and appropriate!
Women do have sensitivity to control. It's unfortunate that you've experienced this double standard. When we (all genders) set boundaries we have "sender responsibility" - how to deliver it in a way that lands for the other person, regardless of gender.
Very good , im not sire what exactly went wrong.bu i know we didn't set parameters early on. As the man , i should have been asking. I was willing to take it slow. I fell hard. She pulled back 2asnt ready. Jo knows gor sure.
@@LoveByDesign Thank you. I plan on making my intentions known , sooner. We had been hanging out in small group. Wasn't getting a lot of one on one. And when I did it was a belly flop.
Dating other people in stage 4 is crazy. How can you possibly get to truly know someone if you're dating other people while truly getting to know the one you're clearly attracted to - mutually. Never take your dating to decision by committee. Think of it this way, you're going to your group of girlfriends for advice, and one has 3 kids by 3 different dads, the other is a bar hoping party girl, and the other has a high notch count, is promiscuous, and you're taking advice from these women? NOT a good idea. Anyone giving advice must have their own shit together, in a big way; They must be in a healthy relationship, be emotionally stable, be a high value woman, and especially be a woman that doesn't gossip! or never tell them or listen to them.
Hey everyone hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts? Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 3 Steps to Heal Yourself after a Toxic Relationship Ends (Warning: Spots are limited)
🗒 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> www.healyourheart.school/webinar
🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> www.healyourheart.school/guide
💕 Apply For Heal Your Heart School Here! www.healyourheart.school/call
I was broken up with because I battle with depression. I’ve spent years learning how to manage it in therapy and never took it out on anyone. One day I had an off day and shared how I was feeling (doubtful a little suicidal) but I managed it and I even spent a few days in nature to recenter myself and I was better. Because she had past trauma with dealing with a relative that deals with depression she thought I was exactly like her and that I would hurt myself. I was put in a box and was not even given a chance. It was a great connection but she decided she didn’t want to deal with me even though I didn’t need her help.
I thought the dating phase and boyfriend/ girlfriend thing was the same thing... Thank you for opening my eyes to a better way to see dating
I’m so glad this gives you some clarification so you’re boundaries are more clear within yourself 🙏
Sometimes friends who are jealous can sabotage your relationship.
@@LoveByDesign Sometimes when a guy has come from a secure attachment Ex and goes into a relationship with an anxious woman, he initially thinks he’s in heaven until she starts being hyper vigilant about the relationship. If she has toxic best friends they may induce her to sabotage the relationship. That happened to me 8 months ago. I’m in NC. I was no saint (I flirty type ) but 80% of the relationship was excellent. I can’t take her back if she rebounded or cheated. I’m dating again after 6 month healing. I’m fitter, wealthier and told I look good 👍
They don't sound like friends to me.
This was so incredibly helpful and insightful. Sadly, I became a widow 11 months ago at just 40 years old when my husband (who I had been with for 22 years, since I was only 18) passed away very suddenly and unexpectedly from sepsis. Never in my life did I expect to become a widow at such a young age, nor did I ever think I'd find a love like that again. However, almost 3 months ago, I met an AMAZING guy on a dating app who lives just 25-30 minutes from me. Ironically, he is originally from the same state as my late husband and only moved here about 7 years ago after his divorce. We talked on the phone and texted for approximately a week before we went out on our first date. Our first date was AMAZING. It could not have gone any better. We immediately felt so comfortable with each other and spent a majority of the time laughing until we were crying. Before we knew it, we had spent about 8 hours together and it felt like no time had passed at all because we were both having such an amazing time. We definitely had and instant connection and felt like we had known each other for years. He's 16 years older than me, but the age gap doesn't bother us at all. He is retired from nearly 30 years of working in law enforcement and I was a paramedic for many years, so we have fairly similar career backgrounds as well as many similar interests and other things in common. Ever since our first date, we have spent nearly every single weekend together going out of town and spending 2-3 nights in hotels and just having the most amazing time together. The only 2 weekends that we didn't get to spend together were the weekends right after his 19-year-old dog passed away and the weekend right after his mother passed away, which were within 2 weeks of each other. However, a week after his mother's passing and immediately after her funeral several days ago, he drove the 3 hours back home to meet up with me and spend the weekend together, showing up at the hotel still in his suit from the funeral. I feel like we had bonded on a much higher level at this point as I had been there to support him as his mother was in hospice at the end of her life and when he had to put his dog down. He told me that I am truly a blessing in his life, and I told him that I feel the same way about him. Now, because my late husband and I rushed into a relationship 23 years ago and had moved in together after only dating for about a month, I somehow feel that is what needs to happen here, which I KNOW it doesn't. We don't even have any labels for our relationship yet and neither of us have come right out and said "I love you" yet, but we have both definitely hinted at love in some of the memes and reels that we text each other that talk about love, so I feel like we are at least progressing in a normal and healthy manner for this stage in our relationship. I know that you can't develop a full-blown relationship in only 3 months and that you really need to take things slow and steady, which is becoming harder and harder for me because I have REALLY fallen hard for this guy and I just can't imagine myself with anyone else. I literally CANNOT stop thinking about him and I'm sad when I'm not able to be with him during the week. I'm bursting at the seams to tell him I love him, but I don't want to risk scaring him away, so I'm holding back a bit longer. I think he knows, but I'm not going to risk saying it too soon, unless of course he says it first, in which case I will obviously reciprocate, because I DO love him and deeply care about him. I often wonder how I've ever lived my life without him up until these last few months. When I'm with him, I feel like I'm home and feel such a sense of peace and happiness. I feel like I can be my true, authentic, raw self with him, which he has said he loves about me - that he can tell I'm being myself and not putting up a front or being fake. When you mentioned stage 4 about being more sensitive to less times of communication, that is EXACTLY what I'm going through right now. Even though we text every single day, at least every morning to say good morning, when there are days when I don't hear from him as much, I start feeling insecure, which I KNOW I have no reason to feel as he has been SUPER consistent the entire time we've been dating, so that is definitely something that I'm trying to work on.
Wow thank you for sharing! I’d love to unpack this further with you on a call: www.healyourheart.school/call
I'm old school, but my natural personality is a friendly one, so it's very easy to start a conversation with anyone. Because I'm old school, I will not share my feelings outright with a man whom I find myself interested in. I still feel that men like being the hunters and they love catching their prey.
Thank you for sharing some interesting information though❤
Interestingly in stage 4 I've always felt betrayed when the person was dating another person. Particularly because the person didnt disclose it to me beforehand and I thought I was the only person. Interesting hearing you talk about it from a different perspective. Also didnt know dating is different from being in a committed relationship.
And it can come back to us - we need to communicate and ask questions before we assume anything (that can lead to "betrayal"). And the difference between dating and committed relationship comes down to the level of communication you engage in to discuss and define the container, this is just a guide.
These videos are so helpful. I recently had an experience where a second date got somewhat physically intimate and my date love-bombed me and is now pulling way back, probably because he feels embarrassed and vulnerable. I feel like I’m on an emotional roller coaster. I like what you said about push/pull and waiting to see if they initiate. I previously would have thought that pulling back would be petty, but it seems like a good way to gage interest.
Soubds like you would need to be the one to reinitiate, if you are the one that refused the advance.
He made an offer, you rejected it, then he withdrew his offer. Now it's up to you to make a counteroffer. That's how I see it.
Just let him know somehow that you are ready for what he is offering, the bedt way is to offer it to him
Pulling back allows us to observe them without investment. I’m glad the videos are helpful 🙏
That was SO helpful! I have watched many videos about relationships and so on but this one hits deeper. I dont know what that is but your words and advice get me right in the spot.
I finally admitted to myself that I have attachment issues. I am not a clingy person, I give space to the other just because I don't want to be annoying but the truth is I am dying inside thinking of them too much and expecting them to behave in a certain way.
I met a guy that seems to be very respectful and could be someone more that's why I see I need to step back a little bit and set some boundaries when it comes to my attachment and mutual physical desire. Damn, never thought it would be so hard!
I am so glad to hear this! Let's unpack this further on a call: www.healyourheart.school/call
Rejection is Gods protection.
It can be 😌
And don't forget that while you're dating if they do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or unhappy simply say to that person you know I don't feel too comfortable with this and or I don't feel happy about this this makes me feel unhappy and see how they respond but always be honest about your own feelings don't say I don't like the way you're treating me because you're unhappy now you're angry and you act angry, just simply say say how you feel and keep it with your own personal feelings like I don't like the way I feel about this, or I feel that we're going too fast and we need to slow down I barely know you things like this don't let a man push you or have you do anything it makes you feel uncomfortable State how it makes you feel uncomfortable. Don't let him push you into anything you don't like and don't get mad and say you're pushing me no just State how it makes you uncomfortable and it does not make you happy and then decide what you need to do during that time regarding his response whether it's walk away or accept his apology and see if it goes better but also never put yourself in a situation where you're alone at a man's home when you're just getting to know him or at his apartment but anywhere alone keep it out in the public when you're trying to get to know someone
This is incredibly enlightening and helpful! As a 20 years old dating only recently, I had so many mistakes, try to analyze and read a lot afterward. Yet this video sum it up really well with highly insightful details (mentioning physical self-care), tiding to logical reasoning (like chemical and psychological behind dating). This doesn't make me feel bad about myself and all the mistakes I made. Yet it helps me gain clarity and empathy to improve.
I'm so glad to hear this! ❤️
This is very interesting. I like the overall goal of looking for the give and take; I feel like it brings purpose to the old rules of dating and a useful perspective on the whole exercise.
I'm so glad it helps you!
I really do love your video. Having come out of my divorce it's been tough getting my feet back under me. Your video has helped me. I'm looking forward to meeting my future partner in time.
I’m so glad to hear this! ❤️
Hello Amy i just discovered your video and thus channel and i am so grateful. Your knowledge and advice is exactly what i needed to hear and i wish i knew when i first started dating at 18. I am excited to watch all your videos and learn as much as i can in order to increase my self worth build strong foundation for myself in order to attract to right man to build a beautiful relationship and life with. Thank you again 🙏🏻
Wonderful! If you need to unpack anything further let's book a call! x
THIS THIS THIS. I’m so thankful to have found your account!
Oh yay! I love your music too! ❤️
Thank you so much for this video, I always wanted someone to help me with what kind of boundaries I should have
I am so glad this is helpful!! 🙏
Hi Amy, loving your content. I subscribed to your channel ❤ Thank you for the work you are doing. I will definitely re-watch and reflect. 🌹
I am so glad to hear this!! ❤️
I would have killed to have this a few months ago, before I lost the most wonderful woman I've ever met.
There will be another wonderful woman and you'll be ready! :)
your channel is absolutely brilliant and is bringing so much clarity and value...! i hope more people will discover you soon, thanks so much for what you do...! 🙏
Oh thank you!! I'm so glad it's helpful for you ❤️
I had to have the conversation of what I'm looking for because it was going in a direction i didn't want it to go. Yep he 👻
Better to know now than down the track!
I think just coming out and having that conversation will scare men off, even if they truly like you and are interested in you before you ask it.
It is helping...
I really love how you express yourself, I think you're beautiful (in a friendly way!). Your video are so pertinent to my life and based on my own life experiences until now, I can see there is so much truth in this. Thank you for sharing the wisdom !
Amazing! I'm so glad they are helpful :)
Amazing talk 🎉
Thank you!
Adored this video, have subscribed! 😊
Thank you for your support! ❤️
Great content 🙏
Thank you! ❤️
great video!!
I wish I found the video earlier in life if would have save me a lot of headache
Isn't it wonderful you found it now! 🫶
Great content!!
Thanks!
This is so good!
Thank you :)
Why would the female have to say she wants to see him more? If he wanted to see her shouldn’t he say or do? If he was enjoying you, you shouldn’t have to ask…it should be his desire
Because communicating our needs is the only way our needs can truly be met. Yes, we can also observe their behaviour and notice their interest in us (this is a part of discernment), and if they don't appear to be interested, that is helpful info that he maybe isn't interested :)
@@LoveByDesignI desire more "women" taking your advice. . .lol
My recent dating has gone extremely well because it seemed like both of us were on the same page about moving forward and continuing to see each other and date. This is a two way street and I want to hear her say she wants to see me again just as much as she want to hear me say it I’m sure, heck at least agree if I bring it up. But it’s nice when both are working to meet up. It’s felt a lot more real
Never chase a man the only ones that enjoy that are usually narcissistic
It is his desire but he needs to know it’s yours too and not cause he asked. He needs the woman to ask and initiate as well at some point.
this was great!
Thank you! ❤️
I dated two times in my life, one 2005 one in 2016. I agree my mom talk boundaries with me and my sibling. Im being patience in God with his time not ours but God time.
hello,how to enjoy connection and be present
I'm a guy and this would be such a welcome change from women just assuming that I'm their boyfriend when they fall in love with me!
Must be tough
Only thing I noticed is the phrasing of push pull. Instead maybe give and take? I know that narcissistic manipulation is described as "push pull" which means more than having a balance of mutual taking turns pursuing. It implies the ghosting or silence etc during any stage between two people.
Otherwise great video, thank you.
I've heard that phrase used in narcissistic circles too. But give/take is not a good substitute. Push/pull describes to many aspects to the "dance", hopefully my audience that has past trauma can discern the new meaning when I teach it. And, you're welcome 🙏
Although I would like to go out for friendship obly, I can't do it honestly with some people. Sometimes I feel romantic about the person from the beginning, and trying to hide it while "being just friends" sound like hell. What then? I shouldn't date them at all?)
No, just take it slowly though 😀
So complicated. Who was supposed to teach all these?
Boundaries in school would be a great start ❤️
how much time would you give to each stage max?
I can't really give you an exact timeline. Stage 1 takes as long as you need to get clear on what you need and feel ready to attract that. Stage 2 when you're meeting people takes as long as it takes until you find someone you want to move to Stage 3 with. Stage 3 leads to Stage 4 naturally when you both get on the same page about your goals/values etc (or don't, and then things end). Stage 5 can come after a few months or much longer - it really is up to both people as to when they want to define things as a relationship. Does that help?
@@LoveByDesignHow long do you think a man who has options and uses them to his advantage but has serious intentions with you would be willing to wait before you decide to get in a relationship with him and give it up?
Yeah I knew I was always head over heels every time I met someone I liked hahaha, very unhealthy, I basically rushed thru the stages and then felt jealous and rejected 😂😂😂😂
Did this help you understand why?
I like some of these but if ir dating and not boyfriend and girlfriend u should focus on other people unless u have the official title of boyfriend or girlfriend which is a relationship. Also if it's been as long as a month and they haven't spent the night I just friend zone them. I can't take them seriously enough in a romantic way or even a dating way
I think monogamy/exclusivity can happen at any stage it's up to the person to decide, and not expect that too soon from the other.
Also I just got dumped from a guy I saw as long as a year that I loved with a full heart. I'm on month two but I feel to fragile with my mental and emotional health to date right now. I'm on month 2 of being single I'm thinking of putting myself out there again at the end of October just because the holidays are coming up. I'll redue my profile then. right now I'm working on platonic friendships
I only believe in being monogamous in the relationship stage right now never the dating phase
Amy, all of the things you cover are relevant but the minute a man discussed boundries with a potential partner he's referred to as controlling. However if the woman talks of boundries its viewed as healthy and appropriate!
Women do have sensitivity to control. It's unfortunate that you've experienced this double standard. When we (all genders) set boundaries we have "sender responsibility" - how to deliver it in a way that lands for the other person, regardless of gender.
Do the places keep opening up or are they just still there....
My calendar changes every week! ❤️
Very good , im not sire what exactly went wrong.bu i know we didn't set parameters early on. As the man , i should have been asking. I was willing to take it slow. I fell hard. She pulled back 2asnt ready. Jo knows gor sure.
Communicate early and often so this doesn't happen :)
@@LoveByDesign Thank you. I plan on making my intentions known , sooner. We had been hanging out in small group. Wasn't getting a lot of one on one. And when I did it was a belly flop.
Dating other people in stage 4 is crazy. How can you possibly get to truly know someone if you're dating other people while truly getting to know the one you're clearly attracted to - mutually. Never take your dating to decision by committee. Think of it this way, you're going to your group of girlfriends for advice, and one has 3 kids by 3 different dads, the other is a bar hoping party girl, and the other has a high notch count, is promiscuous, and you're taking advice from these women? NOT a good idea. Anyone giving advice must have their own shit together, in a big way; They must be in a healthy relationship, be emotionally stable, be a high value woman, and especially be a woman that doesn't gossip! or never tell them or listen to them.
Yes, discernment with who you take advice from is very important 😌