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Thank you very much. I needed to hear this.

Yes this is what I experienced with my spouse

This is excruciatingly too close to home right now. But I feel alot less like I'm crazy now

I began watching this to see if the person I'm connected to is emotionally unavailable, only to find out that I am as well. Does that happen? Emotionally unavailable people are drawn to other emotionally unavailable people? Because I am so open-hearted with him and try to get him to be.

If you are looking up twin flames past life more than likely that’s a trauma bond oh let me not forget familiar spirits.

Been doing this since forever and never learned my lesson 😂

mine says ged try to change, and never did any work.

My brother is locked into a trauma bond it's a sad thing to see we all see his toxic girlfriend but she has full control

Very helpful. Thank you. It was a trauma bond for sure. Whew!

This video was really helpful for me. I've been in therapy a long time, but your comparisons, and table to visualize, really helped me understand my own dynamic and why it's so difficult for me to leave it.

Watching this, thinking in particular about the relationship with my ex (with whom I'm still very close, we are pretty much enmeshed, I'd say) - and then suddenly wondering if it's possible to have a 'trauma bond' with your parent(s)?

Guide

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I think the word friendzone is a way to manipulate women

The guy can’t even communicate

All these signs the guy has I am talking too n I kinda feel depressed with him

How to contact u

When I told him that my needs werentbeing met, he told me that I need to meet my own needs. And while it is true that certain needs of mine can only be met by me, I was referring to needs that I have in a partner- like putting in effort instead of going through the motions, following through on his word, listening to me, etc. On top of that, he recently told me that I should go hking alone because I like to film clips of scenery with the natural noise and so he cant talk while im filming and I cant understand why he wouldnt want to share those beautiful outdoor experiences with me and just not talk for a minute or 2 here and there?! Recently he came over for my birthday with a gift that he bought on the way over, a pair of work gloves, that were unwrapped and slapped them on the counter and said "here." Im not even sure that he wished me a happy birthday. He did drive me to a bearby island for the day- but thats because I pushed for it. On the flip side, Ive volunteered to drive to his place and help him clean and garden- at some points begging to help him because he needed the help and all it did was causehim to resent me... I cant figure out why he wouldnt apprecoate my help. We were together for 6 years. I just ended it.

This is the best dating guru Ive ever found and I'm 45

"genuine on the surface but different underneath" makes zero sense. What are you talking about

thank you

He wouldn't be exclusive after 4 months. It broke my heart to break it off but I knew it was best. Thank for this video confirmed it 🙏🏻

Omg I literally JUST 3 minutes told a guy goodbye because you're WONDERFUL

Omg how did i find you atvthe exact moment to pass on a guy injust started talking to lol

20 years later, and I have supported and waited and tried to help. He’s been in and out of counseling. Claims he wants to change, but then shut down isolates and stone walls. Roller coaster ride. Everything is wonderful until I indicate any sort of unhappiness with anything he says or does and then all hell breaks loose as he can’t handle any constructive criticism or have a conversation about it. It is literally ruined my entire adult life. And yet I still love him. Time to focus on me and figure out why it’s so painful.

Just dropping a comment here as someone with ADHD, not all of these red flags are on purpose. I am looking for a healthy relationship, I just share stuff too easily and love connecting on deeper topics for example. It is extra fun when I date people with ADHD because then we both do that shit

Great content. Just subscribed! You have no idea how much I need this!

Also great video…learning a lot from you 🌻❤

What if he was consistent for 2months And now he’s slowly pulling away… (i.e.- doesn’t check in everyday now but every other day, replies are more self centred and doesnt call at the time he specified he will) I clearly told him I need him to be consistent or atleast not say he will do things only to disappoint me by not following through. Despite peacefully mentioning it once. He was inconsistent yet again. Should I give him another chance? Where does one draw the line? How to cut him off?

This video is so good, the clear distinction between trauma bond and intuition - such an insight!

Yes. Thanks for this.

So this doesn’t work for men establishing boundaries to keep toxic women away?

Thank you very much 👍 I'm so happy to watch that video really really helped me to understand why I made so many mistakes in my past relationships thank you very much I will take all that advice and put in place in my life right now and keep the fingers crossed 🤞 I will be happy finally not disappointed and have high and low roller coaster in my life!! Thank you very much the video was what I truly needed to hear !! ❤️❤️❤️

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Guide please

Do most people experience relationships like you talk about ? Like the honeymoon stage . I’ve never had a relationship like that . Every relationship I’ve been in I don’t want to be in . Every relationship I want to be in , the person I’m interested in doesn’t like. Me , well they like me but they lose attraction as soon as t I show them I have feelings for them. It’s so tiring having to hide your feelings from a person all the time

Such a helpful, strong video! Thank you Amy, whenever i feel the urge i open one of your videos, i found out you are actually helping me to bring my awareness back to myself and my healing process!

yessir Coach Kerr

This thing is awful. You can’t focus, or sleep. You really loose yourself and suppress a lot. Very toxic!!!!

very useful informations, i decided to watch all your videos. I want to improve my self on this part of my life and your videos seems like they will help me on my process. thank you for doing this.

Can you say youre looking for someone who wants to eventually settle down with the rughtbpwrson.

Wow great ❤ thanks I move on

how much time would you give to each stage max?

My ex claimed to love me more than anything and wanted to marry me. Yet the guy hated helping me, being romantic or ever planning anything! I kept voicing my needs and he’d rage at me and call me ungrateful etc. he’d manipulate me back in as soon as I’d start to pull away with gifts etc. he’d promise he would try harder and a week later he’d be back to being so rude and making me cry. He did try to make efforts here and there but I just didn’t feel it was enough. I’m incredibly giving and he wasn’t able to match that energy. Also his anger and immature nature made things so difficult. So even though he looked obsessed with me… i feel he was actually deep down maybe emotionally unavailable? Even tho he’s extremely codependent and only has ever been in relationships his whole life. Like is this possible ??

Anybody know where to meet healthy minded ppl ? Lol like the park ?? The gym?? Ahhh where do I go? bc it ain’t the bar and it ain’t the apps.

Bro where are actual healthy people! I know I’m not bc i attracted a complete narcissist who emotionally abused me… and im trying to do the inner work to understand my childhood trauma. I’m trying to better myself as much as possible and create healthy boundaries. I just hope i can find someone who’s trying to do the inner work too if anything… bc i feel like we all have shit… n I’m not sure anyone is actually fully healthy. But i guess there’s ppl self aware and working on themselves… so that’s good.

Having boundaries is always necessary. It doesn't matter if love, friendship or work. Otherwise you won't be happy. Also just to receive the bare minimum is not enough.

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If your partner is supportive, makes an effort to meet your needs, and connects with you regularly, you will not feel insecure. 99 times out of 100 the only time I feel insecurity in a relationship is when I'm with a s***** partner

Great chart! Thank you for making a messy situation so clear!