Dare To Be You | Shelley Bridgman | TEDxKingstonUponThames
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- Опубликовано: 7 окт 2024
- A lot of work in the personal development industry focuses on changing yourself to become successful and fulfilled. What if you already possess all you will ever need? What if the goal of life is to become who you already are? Shelley is a Performance Coach, Psychotherapist and Hypnotherapist. She specialises in working with Thought Leaders and in the field of Diversity. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
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The story about being led to the gravesite and then choosing to let go of the trauma and fear inherited from her parents is so incredibly powerful. Moments like that don't happen very often and the fact that she recognized it for what it was _in the moment_ is incredible.
The contrast between her struggles and achievements makes such a powerful statement on perseverance. The legal battle for rights was particularly moving, all those people coming in to help.
Thank you @kenfletcher1306. Getting the support was such a big lesson
@@shelleybridgman-DaretobeYou thanks for your bravery
It's outrageous that her legal battle went on for a whole decade. Such unwavering determination and commitment is so, so incredible. That's taking the fight to stick up for your personal identity to such an amazing level and is truly a beacon of hope for future generations.
Shelley's fight for equal rights and her belief in the right to define one's own identity carries a broader message of inclusivity. It challenges societal norms and calls for acceptance and respect for all individuals, regardless of their gender identity.
Thank you @trevoramani I'm pleased you got something from it
Amazing how the speaker turned personal trials into a fight for broader legal recognition. Very impactful.
It's fascinating how she connects personal experiences with broader existential questions!
Her journey through self-discovery to legal victory is a lesson in not giving up on what's important.
Losing a child like your parents did must have been beyond tough. No wonder it shaped how they treated you and the whole vibe at home. Well done on overcoming all of that
The call to action about removing the invisible mask and revealing oneself for true empowerment-it's a powerful message of self-liberation.
It's powerful to hear someone advocate so strongly for defining oneself on one's own terms.
I appreciate the reminder that self-fulfillment is more lasting than transient success or happiness. That's an important one.
I loved her closing statement, and the idea that we already have everything we need inside of us.
The idea that we already possess what we need inside us is really empowering
"Shame needs the oxygen of secrecy." Such a powerful quote Shelley, thank you.
Thanks for the feedback @ByteMayhem
I felt every word of this talk! It's time to shed those masks and embrace authenticity. Let's start a revolution of self-acceptance and empowerment!
Love it! we need a healthy revolution of self-acceptance. Thanks for commenting
I'm so thankful to people like this who have taken such strong and firm steps towards equality. The difference it makes for young trans people is immeasurable.
The description of sitting in the European Court of Justice, being visible, and facing derogatory terms with a smile-it's a powerful image of strength and resilience.
Thank you for your comments @marychristmaseveryone
What an incredible win for Shelley, her team and the world by association. We need more people with her strength and courage.
Thank you Declan. I really appreciate your comments.
I think this talk really speaks to the power of resilience but also having a growth mindset, like seeing it as an opportunity to examine the inner self and correct things that aren't aligned with our authentic self. It's seriously impressive and inspiring.
The speaker's humor about their rough beginnings adds such a warm, human touch to her story.
Thanks Becky
Her story highlights the power of self-acceptance and fighting for one's rights, truly an idea worth spreading 💙
Your story about clubbing every night and numbing yourself with alcohol and drugs is so relatable in terms of people trying to escape their reality or just quieten that inner monologue. Good on you for not getting so caught up in it all that it became a problem in itself.
I appreciate the way she encourages us to stop waiting around and just start embracing our true selves now, even though her story is proof that personal growth and positive change are possible at any stage of life.
Thank you for feedback @kexinan I wish you well on your own journey
Sounds like this chick absolutely crushes it in everything she does. This is how to live life, purely you, willing to fight for your rights and beliefs. That's powerful and it's no wonder people were drawn to her cause
Wow this is such an incredible journey.... so many heart-wrenching stories but her courage to face fears is so inspiring, very grateful to have found this talk.
Thank you for the feedback @TooChatForYou. If there are any questions please feel free to ask
Her insights on facing fear and shame in order to reveal our true selves is really poignant and I tihnk would be so valuable for a lot of people to hear.
The contrast between external success and internal struggle in your travel business days is so relatable. It's a reminder that success doesn't always equate to fulfillment.
Thank you for your astute reminder George
The speaker's call to dare to be ourselves is a challenge I'm ready to accept.
Good luck on your journey @icekunggamer
Dare to be you! Fabulous, talk, fabulous quote fabulous you Shelley Bridgman. 💕💕
The part about finding the gravesite with the photograph catching on the breeze literally gave me chills and tears. Going to such effort to connect to our past is really admirable.
Thank you for taking the time to comment @jmurdaddyforever. much appreciated
The image of an old lady stealing your shoes after the mugging incident is so vivid. It's amazing how life's lows can be intertwined with simultaneous moments of reflection and empathy.
The way you described the cemetery in Israel was so vivid. I could almost smell the cedar and citrus and yes, I got goosebumps too when you spoke about the picture getting caught on the wind
Very proud to call you a friend Shelley. Your honesty with self and others is an example for all. xx
Love you Shelley, lovely person on and off screen ❤️
Nodded my head in agreement when she said personal development experts suggest we need to change to achieve success and happiness rather than look inside for the tools we already have.
I'm pleased you got something from the talk @moyaresgard
The scene where you sat in the ruins of Machu Picchu, letting go of emotion, and considering it your first meditation-so beautifully described. It's a testament to the transformative power of travel and being in the moment.
Thank you for your comments @jamnotsomagicmike. Sometimes we find ourselves in the right place at the right time.
This woman is an absolute trailblazer. I feel very honored to have heard these parts of her story.
Thank you for your comments @EverDragMedia
This really speaks volumes about what fear can do not just to ourselves but our relationships and how we treat others. Good on you for choosing to let go of so much of it.
This story is such a beautiful example of how, when you shine brightly in your true self other people are attracted to that light - it's like a beacon saying 'hey, this is who I am, if you're like this too we can be on the same side.'
Thank you so much @justinesaxenn That's a very astute insight.
Your mom’s reaction to your qender change with “but it’s not normal” really hit me. It’s tough when your loved ones don’t get it
I think her journey is a reminder that sometimes the most beautiful transformations come from facing our deepest fears. It might be hard in the moment but it is worth going through to be who we are truly meant to.
I'm glad you got something from my talk @williamsmythe. Thank you for commenting
That part about finding strength in the depths of winter was incredibly poignant and really resonated with me.
This is such an amazing example of what resilience and authenticity looks like.
I'm so pleased you enjoyed my talk @happyriley
Another profound insight from this talk = most people don't want to not be here they just don't know how to live. Amen to that!
Thank you @maymaylui3rd, I'm pleased you got something from the talk
I think this story shows that when you finally know and accept who you are, there's so much power in honoring that authenticity you can take on huge challenges like that court case
Thank you for watching Chandrazu
I also feel like weeping at the story of her finding that gravestone. What a poignant and beautiful moment.
Thank you for commenting @MediaMediums. I'm pleased you took something from the talk
I love this message, if we were all better at being ourselves the world would be a much happier place
Thank you Shelley! THANK YOU! Enough of the BS industry telling us to keep going until we reach the stars. WE ARE THE STARS!!
Thanks @anklebloem. I love it that you can own you are already a Star. Long may you shine
Incredibly moving talk Shelley! Such a powerful and empowering message! All with plenty of humour!! SUPERHUGGS!!
This is so heartwarming. It goes to show that our past doesn't define us. Thanks for sharing your beautiful and empowering journey.
Thank you @evanesternah. That was also my biggest lesson
The incident of being mugged in Peru seems like a turning point. It's fascinating to see how adversity can sometimes propel us towards self-discovery and transformative change.
W's all around, this lady is money and her message is the most important for getting true happiness
I love how she uses humor to lighten the discussion of such deep and personal topics. It made it way easier to absorb because obviously there are some pretty full on parts of the story
I appreciate that Dylan
I don't know why I teared up around the 12:40 mark?? Hearing about so many people wanting to fight for her... so beautiful.
Thank you @carlasteadman. I'm still moved by their generosity
Oh my goodness the story about finding the grave! Chills! I can't imagine how it would have felt actually experiencing something like that
Thank you for commenting Henry. The experience was somehow very affirming. Hard to explain.
I love the concept of authenticity and self-actualization. Psychological theories like Maslow's hierarchy and Rogers' person-centered therapy echo the importance of becoming our true selves.
The realization at the gravesite about letting go of inherited fear is so freakin poignant. Hoping you managed to break the cycle 💜
Really struck by the importance of confronting our fears as she suggested. Seems like it would be life-changing.
This just shows why you should never give up on yourself!
Many moments of this talk struck a chord but the image of an old lady stealing her shoes [6:50 minute marker] was the saddest.
A wonderful and moving story with laughter in all the right places. Embracing loss and acceptance of life's journey!
I think one of the key takeaways in all of this is the power of choice. We all have the power to choose how we respond to our circumstances.
Absolutely right Tony. Knowing we have a choice even when it's difficult is empowering.
I laughed I cried, better than an hour and a half with my therapist. Awesome Shelly.
Thank you Isabella. I'm pleased you got something from the talk.
Hearing about her moment of realization was so wonderful. It's amazing how our hardest experiences shine a light on things that need to be confronted or emphasis what is most important, and if we're able to see through the initial pain and hardship of the situation, that's when powerful changes start to happen.
Seeing through the pain is so hard to do but it is truly liberating when we can. Thank you for your feedback @ezekielaliss
Love what she says about not having to buy into the shame
Wow. That point of grief at the headstone. That unpacking and feeling the wave of emotions that come with acceptance. Really moving.
Thank you @bobergenn
So much strength here, beautiful to witness 💛
I think there's so much strength to be gained from reflecting on our fears and shame and then conquering them. It brings so much confidence and self-assuredness that nobody can take away.
Thank you @austinjay9486.I appreciate you sharing your insights
I really love what she says about how taking the mask off is about revealing yourself to yourself, not to others. It's a beautiful thought and self-discovery is a really important process that everyone should undertake at least once throughout their life.
Thank you for commenting @mstic.10. I'm so pleased this meant something to you
I really appreciate how open this person is. It's refreshing to hear stories that go beyond the surface and give true scope to the experiences that have shaped us.
Thank you @kinsleydanton. I'm glad you got something from my talk
Wow going through the courts and the support from your legal team-it highlights the importance of fighting for one's rights and the power of a united team.
Thank you @lornabalang. It was very humbling to receive such amazing support
Shelley Bridgman You can red pill me anytime! And quote Camus as we all have an invincible summer within us.
Bless you and keep showing others how to claim their authenticity 🙏🏽❤️
Thanks Shelley for saying that I am ok and have everything I need and I don't need to turn myself upside down and inside out
Thank you I'm so pleased that message meant something to you
This is an amazing TEDx talk by Dr. Shelley Bridgman. I loved your humour, storytelling and weaving of your message. Thank you for your authenticity, transparency and perseverance for us to dare to be ourselves.
A belated thank you for your appreciation Elaine
The assertion of your human right to define yourself is a powerful message. It prompts reflection on the delicate balance between authenticity and societal expectations.
Thank you @mymotivationsnow It was such a hard lesson but a liberating one
Wow. Shelley, you should be like the spokesperson for our species at this point. Amazing talk
Thank you @jonasblix. You're very generous
What an incredible journey this woman has been on to get to herself and also pave the way for others. Just beautiful.
Thank you @ClusterofHope, I really appreciate your comments
I have infinite respect for anyone who has the courage to transition. I can't imagine how difficult it is to do all the emotional work to figure out that's what you need, let alone take steps to bringing it into reality.
Thank you for your kind words Nigel
Shelley you are one of the funniest and most engaging speakers I've ever heard...'I was as good at self-destruction as I was at running a business' and many of your other lines made me laugh and get tears in my eyes simultaneously
Thank you for commenting Helen. I'm delighted you got something from my talk.
Growing up in an environment steeped in fear must have been incredibly challenging, it's so hard to tell as well when we're in those situations the affect it's having on us at a foundation level
Shelley Bridgman you are delight! So wonderfully natural with such ease. True to you and your TED title! Thank you.
Thank you Marina. I'm glad you enjoyed it
This is such an amazing story to me. I can't imagine living so much of your life knowing that you were in the wrong body and then having something so awful happen to you that it changed your perspective and gave you the courage to do something that you know is going to put you through an even tougher time. So much bravery in that and truly helping pave the way for future generations to not have to endure something awful before taking those steps.
That's a wonderful thing to say @IamShootCute I think we all get handed a challenge and it's simply about how we deal with it that defines us. I wish you well in your personal future
Her story about her experiences in Peru and Bolivia are truly captivating.
Thank you Lorraine. I'm glad you got something from the talk
Loved hearing about all the court stuff, just goes to show when you stand in your authentic power people will be rallied towards you
A powerful message for anybody, thank you
Thank you @sabahachim
Such a brave story told with honesty and humour. Thank you Shelley.
This talk gave me a renewed sense of hope. It's never too late to make a change and embrace who we truly are. I'm ready to take that step towards fulfillment
Thank you for your comments and I wish you well on your next steps.
brave, and vulnerable - doesnt matter gender, matters character
The legal battle story is a testament to the determination and belief in justice.
I've never thought about how, as humans we should all have the right to define ourselves. I guess that speaks to my privilege, because I can't think of any time someone has tried to tell me that who I am is wrong. Thank you for helping me understand all of this a bit better, Shelley.
Thank you for your comments @williambessel. I'm so glad you got something valuable from my talk
Oh man the line at the 11:20 mark was just... very real. I think alot of people have felt this.
Awesome video. I always enjoy your speaking
"When you face your fear, you deal with your shame" Thank you Shelley for your honesty and humour in sharing your story. Wonderful talk and proud to know you xx
It's interesting how much she had to endure... getting bullied and then the ordeal in Peru. Obviously built her resilience up to an epic level and that's even before all the court stuff!
Loved the story about finding the grave - it gave me goosebumps too!! But I think that kind of emotional impact also shows how our past and family history shape who we are
Perspective is everything - some might say a lot of self growth stuff relies on us shedding conditioning and looking beyond trauma based belief systems, to figure out who we really are, what is actually us and not what we are told is us.
Thank you for your comments @kingbrantley. You hit the nail on the head
The moment of getting mugged in Peru is intense. Pretty easy to see why that would be such a huge turning points for someone
This talk made me pause and think about the masks I've been wearing in my own life. It's time to embrace my true self and face my fears. Thank you for the motivation!
Thank you for your comments. I'm so pleased you're ready to embrace your true self. Don't forget to let others help you to face your fears. I wish you well on your journey
Thank you Shelley! There is such power to be found in vulnerability and self-acceptance. From fear to fulfillment should be a mantra for everyone at some point in their life. It's a perspective check that can lead to a truly meaningful transformation 👏🏽❤
Thanks Alex. I'm so please the message was relevant for you.
This is an awesome story! Loved hearing it, even the sad and shocking parts. Like life itself they add so much depth to all the other parts.