If you want to achieve your goals, don't focus on them: Reggie Rivers at TEDxCrestmoorParkED

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  • Опубликовано: 6 ноя 2013
  • Former Denver Broncos running back Reggie Rivers discusses how focusing on your goals is the one sure way NOT to achieve them. With humor and insight he goes on to explain how focusing on your behaviors is how you achieve goals.
    In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

Комментарии • 2,7 тыс.

  • @raphaeldayan
    @raphaeldayan 5 лет назад +8370

    1. Set goal
    2. Forget the goal and determine the process you need to achieve the goal
    3. Fall in love with the process
    4. Do the process without thinking about the goal
    5. Eventually, achieve the goal

  • @vandannhidao6365
    @vandannhidao6365 3 года назад +2564

    I will understand it like this: ”Success is not something you pursue. It is something you attract by the person you become.” - Jim Rohn

    • @robertkosen436
      @robertkosen436 2 года назад +5

      ✔️✔️✔️

    • @potterylady44
      @potterylady44 2 года назад +3

      🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

    • @devilsoffspring5519
      @devilsoffspring5519 2 года назад +20

      Another way of putting it is, "Enjoying the pursuit *IS* the success, becoming wealthy is the bonus check."

    • @1953sharoha
      @1953sharoha Год назад +1

      Absolutely

    • @MrSridharMurthy
      @MrSridharMurthy Год назад +1

      Law of Success ! ( Attraction) Yep !

  • @ogmac1804
    @ogmac1804 Год назад +252

    Don't mess up your goals by putting yourself under pressure. Everything is so much better without pressure. You will love what you do without the expectation of success. It's all about feeling good about yourself. This is your Life.

  • @user-sl3kq7og5l
    @user-sl3kq7og5l 3 года назад +1059

    My Summary :
    If you wanna achieve your goals, focus on controlling your actions/behavior towards yourself or other people. Don't focus on the goals itself, but focus to enjoy the process that will lead you to achieve your goals instead.
    Ex : i wanna get a fit body, so i do exercise. I focus on exercising that day and feel good at the moment. I focus on the part that i can controlled, which is controlling myself, my consistency. Try to enjoying the workout while thinking that i've been closer to my goal. ^^
    Just in case if you're in a hurry, hope it's helpful :)

  • @jamessullivan5181
    @jamessullivan5181 7 лет назад +8535

    You'll never climb a mountain looking at the top

    • @ayusa8493
      @ayusa8493 5 лет назад +73

      @James Sullivan well summarized.

    • @browser37
      @browser37 5 лет назад +33

      James Sullivan great quote

    • @drutter
      @drutter 4 года назад +57

      I was always taught "you can only climb a mountain by looking at the top", and as I've gone through life I've found it to be true.

    • @JewardJayOfficial
      @JewardJayOfficial 4 года назад +13

      You'll never climb a mountain looking at the top.

    • @carolynaitken7632
      @carolynaitken7632 4 года назад +19

      Jeward Jay I didn’t say look at the top I said look at where you’re at not up or down but where you are at!

  • @DanishKhan-kg8os
    @DanishKhan-kg8os 7 лет назад +3515

    Summary:
    Steps
    1. Set Goals
    2. Dont focus on the Goal
    3. Focus on the Behaviours that controls the Goal.
    4. Reach your Goal!

    • @fran-yt4ok
      @fran-yt4ok 7 лет назад +5

      Thankyou :)

    • @firouzkarim7842
      @firouzkarim7842 7 лет назад +2

      StrkR Muzik I hope you make it man.

    • @febedahre7315
      @febedahre7315 7 лет назад +5

      thanks

    • @user-ti2xi9bd4u
      @user-ti2xi9bd4u 7 лет назад +15

      Danish Khan thanks you saved 10:41 mins in my lige

    • @koolsamie
      @koolsamie 7 лет назад +5

      Danish Khan so true... to your name as well..!!

  • @geethaanuvanahally4089
    @geethaanuvanahally4089 2 года назад +137

    Every TED talk is a precious lesson for life

  • @bhargavranjankaushik9262
    @bhargavranjankaushik9262 Год назад +29

    You don't attract what you want, you attract what you are. This talk just exactly taught this

  • @Tbessix220
    @Tbessix220 7 лет назад +1376

    My mentor once said "Focus on the process, falling in love with the process is the secret to success."
    if you wanna make money, don't focus on the money, fall in love with the process of making money... (whatever is your plan)

  • @GetSetFly
    @GetSetFly 7 лет назад +869

    Goals should be just set to provide a direction you want to go. Plan of action is what you need to device next and focus on working towards it in order to achieve your goals. Actions have magic in them!

    • @keshardev6633
      @keshardev6633 3 года назад +6

      Hey gaurav bhaiya 💕 If you are reading it please tell in any one your vedio that how you attract your subscribers to watch your each and every vedio because I think you have a magic in your voice 🤩, literally the same I feel for ownself too 😉 but the way you but the tadka 🍝 of sense of humour and joy is just Awesome! 🥳

    • @VikasYadav-hf7eo
      @VikasYadav-hf7eo 3 года назад +2

      Ji bhaia that's true!

    • @thientruongcong5262
      @thientruongcong5262 2 года назад

      gthshha

    • @ayusharyan3312
      @ayusharyan3312 2 года назад

      Ohoo

    • @natashamerline
      @natashamerline 2 года назад

      But is it healthy to keep looking at your progress?

  • @quike.5249
    @quike.5249 Год назад +47

    1) you can control your behaviour
    2) focus on behaviour required
    3) write down goal
    Ask 3 questions
    What can I do today, tomorrow and this week to achieve x goal

  • @LouisePetit2002
    @LouisePetit2002 Год назад +38

    1. If you want to achieve your goals don't focus on them.
    if you spend too much time focusing on your goals, you'll never achieve them.
    you alone can do behaviors, and behaviors are things that you focus on in order to achieve your goals
    2. if you focus on your goal, you won't achieve it. Instead, you have to focus on your behaviors. your behaviors are what is in your control
    So, when I sat a goal, I say " What can I do today that is going to help me to get closer to that goal? " ; " What can I do tomorrow that is going to help me to get closer to that goal? " and " What can I do this week that is going to help me to get closer to that goal? "
    i'm focused 100% on the part that is in my control.

  • @jeremyngpiano
    @jeremyngpiano 9 лет назад +2020

    This talk reminds me of a Jim Rohn quote: _“The ultimate reason for setting goals is to entice you to become the person it takes to achieve them.”_
    When we focus on the behaviour as Reggie puts it, goals make us a better person. That's the real gem of setting goals. It's not whatever we set out to achieve, but rather, the person we grow into as a result.

    • @MichaelChernik-zf2fy
      @MichaelChernik-zf2fy 9 лет назад +5

      Goals change behavior. I understand he concept he will continue to develop. He is on to something. The goal is not where you are now, but what you want, what you want to be. Law of attraction. that is the purpose of goals. So he is contradictory. He admits he sets goals. When someone gets serious either by nature or wanting to change and stick to the goals, tweak goals as you go along; this changes behavior When you focus on your goals, you will see what behavior you have to change.
      You you say you will do something you have to do it.
      his talk reminds me of a Jim Rohn quote: “The ultimate reason for setting goals is to entice you to become the person it takes to achieve them.”
      When we focus on the behaviour as Reggie puts it, goals make us a better person. That's the real gem of setting goals. It's not whatever we set out to achieve, but rather, the person we grow into as a result

    • @RobertSpiller
      @RobertSpiller 9 лет назад +18

      Not only that Jeremy, but Jim also said work on yourself more than your goals, and this is what he's talking about. Focus on becoming the type of person that will achieve that goal. That makes a lot of sense to me.

    • @JunayedHasanAyon
      @JunayedHasanAyon 9 лет назад +1

      ***** Not certain about the points made but ,if anyone else wants to discover how can you achieve success try Sarparder Subliminal Starter (do a search on google ) ? Ive heard some unbelievable things about it and my partner got excellent results with it.

    • @22261697
      @22261697 9 лет назад +1

      Junayed Hasan hi everyone ,if anyone else wants to learn about ways to achieve your goals try Sarparder Subliminal Starter (do a google search ) ? Ive heard some amazing things about it and my mate got excellent success with it.

    • @RobertSpiller
      @RobertSpiller 9 лет назад +1

      Junayed Hasan I went to that video, but I don't see any testimonials, no one is saying that they've increased their income. Whom do you know has had an increase in income by using that particular video series?

  • @silyu97
    @silyu97 5 лет назад +679

    "future is just a concept. it was never exist...
    life is just an eternal now" -Alan Watts

  • @jennyzhang3088
    @jennyzhang3088 Год назад +50

    This is so true. I always set up goals, I mean so many goals. But I have never think about how to change my life styles, attitude, or behaviors to actually make some changes. Now I learned. I am so glad that I swiped to this video today. It inspired me a lot. Thank you.

    • @SixStringsCovers
      @SixStringsCovers Год назад +2

      Setting up goals take too much of your energy because you think about them all the time and you are going to be disappointed if you won't achieve them. Start focusing on your progress instead and enjoy the process and also the little things in life.

  • @BibleBlondie
    @BibleBlondie 5 месяцев назад +7

    1) Focus on what’s in your control - your behaviours
    2) Our goals are outside of our control
    3) Focus on input which will lead to the output
    4) Goals require the participation of other people that why they’re never in your full control whereas…
    5) Your behaviour is fully in your control

  • @RayAngeloRamilo
    @RayAngeloRamilo 9 лет назад +312

    first of all, this guy is very charismatic, I admire that. and what he's saying is probably true. For 3 years now I wanted to be a rapper but never focus on how to be one. I'm going to try to write my first song tonight. wish me luck yo.

    • @projectsuperstore4049
      @projectsuperstore4049 9 лет назад +16

      How did your song go?

    • @morganthem
      @morganthem 9 лет назад +3

      You should like tongue twisters then.... I'm a vocalist, not a rapper, but diction is everything. Well not really but it is important.

    • @18marisol
      @18marisol 9 лет назад

      RayAngeloRamilo best of luck

    • @dmemon7722
      @dmemon7722 9 лет назад +1

      How did it go?

    • @saltypsychosis4093
      @saltypsychosis4093 7 лет назад +2

      best o luck

  • @DoubIeRose
    @DoubIeRose 7 лет назад +1588

    I've heard countless ted talks and at least for me this is the best one.

    • @monsterhigh1975
      @monsterhigh1975 7 лет назад +18

      i am watching this because of your comments..
      :D

    • @monsterhigh1975
      @monsterhigh1975 7 лет назад +7

      i am watching this because of your comments..
      :D

    • @almas1081
      @almas1081 7 лет назад +1

      DoubIeRose and mee 😉

    • @krystonjones
      @krystonjones 7 лет назад +6

      DoubleRose: Damn! I was about to say the exact same thing. Now I will have to focus on speeding up my commentating, to get you back.

    • @pearguysnek
      @pearguysnek 7 лет назад

      kryston jones 6011234456uy670

  • @englishwithtaryar6044
    @englishwithtaryar6044 9 месяцев назад +11

    Don’t focus on your goals.
    Focus on your behavior.
    Control what you can.
    Don’t control what you can’t.
    Make your behavior out of best today , tomorrow and coming week.
    Thank you Reggie🎉❤

  • @TheWilDOn31
    @TheWilDOn31 8 месяцев назад +3

    If you keep THINKING about the goal you drive yourself nuts - you feel it's too hard somehow and that frustration affects you and stops you.
    So I think this video says quite clearly: set a goal, start working on it, and forget about it.
    Simply forget about it ...

  • @QuickTalks
    @QuickTalks 8 лет назад +741

    Summary:
    "The secret is to focus on the behavior that will lead you to the goal and get your mind off the goal.
    Focus on the process, not the goal. You can control 100% your behavior, but not always the exact outcome of the goal, so focus on what you can control, not what you can't"

  • @tarikay93
    @tarikay93 8 лет назад +283

    This goes hand-in-hand with the words of Bruce Lee: "A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at."

  • @Simran-qu5ny
    @Simran-qu5ny Год назад +46

    This video teaches me two things. Firstly don't focus on your goal, focus on your actions or behaviors which help you to achieve your goal. Secondly, the things which are not under your control, don't worry about them. Just focus on yourself.
    Be sure you are doing right, right for you which is not bad for others, and everything else left for God.

    • @themacocko6311
      @themacocko6311 7 месяцев назад +2

      Pretty sure God had nothing to do with it

  • @ichi_san
    @ichi_san Год назад +11

    This was nice. Everything seems so much more achievable when the focus shifts to behaviours instead of things that are out of one's control

  • @shinhyeokhur5899
    @shinhyeokhur5899 7 лет назад +286

    The man's got some comforting inspirational voice.

  • @TheRealAbrahamLincoln
    @TheRealAbrahamLincoln 9 лет назад +458

    Thanks for this message. This is a much better approach to success than having some motivational speaker yelling at you for an hour telling you that you just need to want it bad enough.

  • @venyoktaviany7990
    @venyoktaviany7990 Год назад +9

    This video is also one of the best Ted Talks I've ever heard. It's also one of the first Ted Talks that actually made me laugh out loud despite having to read the translation. What speaker Reggie Rivers said is absolutely true. We should not be too focused on our goals, but focus on the behavior we do to achieve these goals.
    In my opinion, having a goal is important because if someone has a goal then he will inspire himself to do better things. Successful people certainly will not be like that in a short time. What most people see at a glance as wealth, a great career and accomplished goals are the result of hard work and busyness that takes up a lot of time. In this video it can also be concluded that the first step to achieving a goal is to set a goal, then set that goal aside and determine the process that will be needed to achieve the goal, after that love or enjoy the process and do the process without thinking about the goal so that in the end we will be able to achieve the goal we want.
    Cheers to all of us!!

  • @PT-vg3xi
    @PT-vg3xi Год назад +6

    If you are way too focus on your goal, you will only think about the result and if it is not the good one, you will get disappointed and eventually you will lose your track. Instead, you should focus on your behaviors and even if u face smth bad, just take it as a lesson or step to climb higher and continue your process. Take control of what you can…not the one you cannot…This video makes me realize this…Thank youu!!

  • @jeehooahn9114
    @jeehooahn9114 8 лет назад +274

    This guy would be a great guy to be friends with.

  • @ChineseIrish
    @ChineseIrish 7 лет назад +383

    I found this to be true in my life. There are so many goals I didn't achieve because i was so focused on them I wanted them as fast as possible, which meant doing unenjoyable behaviors (lots of cramming) and eventually quitting.
    But I also got a black belt in Taekwondo when that wasn't a serious goal. I just liked hanging out at the club with my team mates so I trained everyday. (Enjoyable behavior)
    Making the good behaviors enjoyable I think is the key to a good life.

    • @munnaahmed4148
      @munnaahmed4148 4 года назад

      Wow.. Very interesting...great plan...

    • @parimtm
      @parimtm 4 года назад +1

      But what about a great life?

    • @rheasapanizales3872
      @rheasapanizales3872 4 года назад

      ChineseIrish wow! Thank you for this👍🏻

    • @investment90
      @investment90 4 года назад +1

      the same :)

    • @violetsky1285
      @violetsky1285 3 года назад +5

      Basically you've to be in a state of flow of passion and love and enjoyment. The outcome of success is inevitable and you wouldn't really be as happy as much as you're happy actually doing the little things consistently with happines and enjoyment

  • @MrFischvogel
    @MrFischvogel Год назад +26

    A clear thinker and great speaker !

  • @precious5605
    @precious5605 2 года назад +23

    The truth is more important than the facts. Access to productive information is what we all need to become successful in life. To possibly create wealth good enough to retire, proficiency is indeed necessary; causing most affluent entrepreneurs to acquire the synergy of wealth managers that offers high-net-worth operations that encompasses all parts of a person’s financial life. Get yourself an aid

    • @theodorerossi7998
      @theodorerossi7998 2 года назад

      Our perceptions of your approach influence how we interpret, understand, and act on the truth.
      It’s so true that rich individuals seek the knowledge and skills of professionals and claim to achieve their success without any prior help

    • @Elizabethgreen779
      @Elizabethgreen779 2 года назад

      The thoughts and ideas here are remarkable and would as well appreciate it if I’m enlightened more on how to get a wealth manager.

    • @precious5605
      @precious5605 2 года назад

      @@Elizabethgreen779 To achieve your goals, proficiency makes your plans a reality. I engage in compound interest and leveraging and as well operate exclusive packages with a body of a wealth management firm and so far I’ve attained good ROI (amount is confidential)

    • @precious5605
      @precious5605 2 года назад

      As to get more details on the wealth manager, easily do quick internet research; (Genevieve Glen Rogers) where I believe you can easily approach her from, do your research with her full names mentioned.

    • @svenoliver6040
      @svenoliver6040 2 года назад

      Thanks that makes the most sense

  • @mineonlyhooves
    @mineonlyhooves 7 лет назад +235

    The greatest advice ever given. This is something tangible that actually works.

    • @sjb5092
      @sjb5092 7 лет назад +2

      The Lazу Реrson's Secret To Gеt Еverything Yоu've Еvеr Wishеd For => twitter.com/7b3c9fb14125d6cd5/status/804630629388152832 If уou want to aсhiеve your gоals don t foccссus оn thеm Rеggie Rivers аt TEDхCrеstmoоrPаrkED

    • @icekurimu1688
      @icekurimu1688 5 лет назад

      Sj B 😂

  • @lavidaesplendida
    @lavidaesplendida 7 лет назад +89

    This was amazing. I've realised that my biggest mistake in life has been exactly this... too much focus on my goals and not enough attention to my daily behaviours and action to achieve them...

  • @loankim565
    @loankim565 9 месяцев назад +29

    After watching this video I feel like I am going in the right way. Keep going, loving and contributing to the world then you will receive what you deserve. "Go with the flow and enjoy the process"
    Thank you so much for such an inspirational sharing :3

  • @longguitar4194
    @longguitar4194 4 года назад +40

    Well, this channel is too good for me to learn English
    I can hear it over and over again to improve my skills like listening, speaking, grammar, my communication, my imagination, and a lot.

  • @saniahsan
    @saniahsan 8 лет назад +82

    He was 100% right; I can tell this from my own experience. At one point in my life, I was so much committed to a goal, that I almost forgot I have a family who love and yearn for my attention and yet I ignored them and totally focused on my goal. Guess what? I failed to achieve it; then I felt totally ashamed of my behavior towards my near and dear ones and totally abandoned my outside responsibilities; I went from one extreme to the other extreme: both are problematic and are prone to failure, depression, and/or anxiety.
    At another point in my life, I ultimately achieved something, something of a kind that I have been waiting for so many years to get, and this is the first time I got something like this. But when I achieved itm I felt relaxed and slowly but surely retired from my responsibilities, since I already achieved it! I deserve rest now. However, internally, I was not happy either, because I was questioning myself: does it worth so much struggle, pain & sacrifices? I mean, I didn't really enjoy much of the process I had to go through to achieve that goal, most of the steps directly conflicted with my personality type (I had to do a lot of acting to conform with the crowd around me though I didn't like those type of people), yet I forbore for the sake of that goal because I was thinking: how awesome that goal would be! If I achieve it, its joy will definitely let me forget about all those sacrifices, etc. But the opposite happened. I felt that the joy was momentary, as compared to the actual pains of the process.
    In summary, I realized that if you don't like the process, no matter whether you achieve your goal or not, you won't be satisfied/fulfilled/happy. So love what you do rather than loving/focusing on your goals.

  • @markd2797
    @markd2797 7 лет назад +280

    TED TALKS YOU HAVE IMPROVED MY LIFE SO MUCH! THIS ONE IS... JUST AMAZING. Simple, to the point, not boring, relative... 100% on this one :)

  • @sonyclaystation
    @sonyclaystation 4 месяца назад

    I read the title and instantly found the problem within the way I was working. I think about where I want to be so often that no sort of work I put in feels as if I’ve done enough. amazing ted talk

  • @jackhart9289
    @jackhart9289 Год назад +16

    This was an important reminder that I needed today. Thank you ❤️

  • @RahulGupta-ju1tm
    @RahulGupta-ju1tm 8 лет назад +181

    A wonderful wonderful speaker. :)
    So calm and confident. It is pleasant to hear him speak.

    • @PhilosophicalBum21
      @PhilosophicalBum21 8 лет назад

      +Rahul Gupta Yeah! He was a very affable, easy-to-follow speaker. Love his speaking style.

    • @pratyushpriyadarshi8130
      @pratyushpriyadarshi8130 8 лет назад +5

      +Rahul Gupta I like how he does the switch from Calm to imitating an angry person.

    • @nitishmaan7444
      @nitishmaan7444 7 лет назад +5

      I think he unknowingly explained "Karmanye vadhikaraste Ma Phaleshu Kadachana"

  • @Alm.H
    @Alm.H 6 лет назад +78

    "It's the journey what brings us happines not the destination"
    -Peacful Worrier.

  • @aditisuryawanshi1967
    @aditisuryawanshi1967 4 года назад

    His voice is so calming!

  • @riyarose4514
    @riyarose4514 Год назад +1

    He spoke so well ! Great ! Just loved it!

  • @pastor_labhpreet_paul
    @pastor_labhpreet_paul 5 лет назад +320

    In conclusion: Focus on process not on Results.

    • @danielparlered3944
      @danielparlered3944 3 года назад +19

      I would say progress instead, but yeah pretty much

  • @grazryan
    @grazryan 7 лет назад +318

    I'm so inspired by this talk

    • @frankfierro6451
      @frankfierro6451 7 лет назад

      yes

    • @julieta7790
      @julieta7790 7 лет назад

      same

    • @pussnboots2271
      @pussnboots2271 7 лет назад

      me too, but I just don't understand because if your trying to get into something like selective schools test or something, you have to work for it and study for it to get in, you don't just go to that test empty minded you have to go to that test thinking your going to get in and you've worked so hard for this.

    • @terezasebkova775
      @terezasebkova775 7 лет назад +4

      +Letty! Look I'll give you an example okay?:) You want to get the test and make it, you set a goal for yourself, which is the test.
      But you can't control the grading or whatever. You only can control how much work will you put in.
      So he's right.
      Don't focus on the final grade, focus on how much work you do and how you study. (To make it.)
      Hope this will help! :)

    • @grazryan
      @grazryan 7 лет назад +2

      Tereza Šebková Very well said...

  • @soumiabenrekia5796
    @soumiabenrekia5796 3 года назад +1

    He is the best speaker I habe ever listened to.

  • @newlife.vanessacalfan
    @newlife.vanessacalfan 2 года назад

    soft spoken kind and inspriring soul. thank you

  • @malouskids
    @malouskids 7 лет назад +61

    Thank you Reggie! I recently had Weigh loss surgery June 9th. In Oct,2015 my first weigh in at the Bariatric Center I weighed 299. I am 5ft 3 in. Today I weigh 249. Your speech is teaching me to focus on my behaviors not on my goal. This speech really spoke to me.

    • @Paolaandreaxx
      @Paolaandreaxx 7 лет назад +3

      Congratulations 😊

    • @mzsnayem1731
      @mzsnayem1731 7 лет назад +3

      congrats. and remember the attitude.

    • @trivo3949
      @trivo3949 4 года назад

      @@mzsnayem1731 thanks you

  • @rositarose7928
    @rositarose7928 7 лет назад +168

    when people mock at you. means you do something.

    • @rositarose7928
      @rositarose7928 7 лет назад +1

      L O nice to hear

    • @fodaygbondo8292
      @fodaygbondo8292 7 лет назад +1

      good advice

    • @FaFa-bw1mm
      @FaFa-bw1mm 7 лет назад +3

      that's so encouraging n positive:)

    • @LessonsInLife
      @LessonsInLife 5 лет назад +6

      You need to believe in yourself even when things aren't going right. Get outside your comfort zone and learn as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

    • @X3000Chan
      @X3000Chan 4 года назад

      ? When people mock you it means you do something? Can you rephrase that? I don't understand what you mean.

  • @chinasacasmir
    @chinasacasmir Год назад +4

    If you focus too much on your goal, you will never achieve the goal- you will have to focus on the behavior !!!! Heard this at the right time in my life😌🙏

  • @random-sv7rz
    @random-sv7rz 7 месяцев назад +1

    Ted× talks is the best thing I've ever discovered full stop! 🙌

  • @dmoneyhustler1486
    @dmoneyhustler1486 9 лет назад +135

    I have never failed. I have found a lot of ways that won't work, Never failed. I refuse to accept that I am not the best at what I do in life. Whether it be my job at a gas station, or doing lawn care part time, or creating electronic dance music, I pay extra attention to what I do, and always focus on learning new things, and always enthused to discover ways that won't work. You will not feel like the best at what you do until you declare it, once you have declared it, and have accepted that, you must prove it, by learning from every mistake you make, with extreme perseverance, you will get to a point where you say "WOW, look how far I have come!" just by being enthused about the fact that you are the best, and ready to prove it, and every mistake is just a part of getting to the mastery you declared at the beginning. People will hate on you, and prove you are not worthy, but that is just fuel for the fire. Take what they say and prove them which you have already declared and accepted in your heart. Most importantly love yourself. It's easier said than done, but you will lack faith in your ability's until you learn to love yourself and have extreme self value.

    • @dmoneyhustler1486
      @dmoneyhustler1486 9 лет назад +3

      Dan Wilson Accepting that you are not the best, and in progress to be the best is what prevents you from moving forward. In order to actually make progress, you must accept that you already the best, and the proof is already in your heart, but for the people to validate that, you must do what ever you have to, failure means progress.

    • @Richietek318
      @Richietek318 8 лет назад +2

      Today was my first foray into commodities trading and I lost
      a lot of cash in 4 hours. Your comments gave me a different perspective and I don't feel as bad. Much appreciated.

    • @therealme1518
      @therealme1518 8 лет назад +2

      Dan W That truly is the secret of success! And success is never a straight line but full of twists and turns-with that attitude you can successfully navigate your way to your goal.

    • @o0LoveLove0o
      @o0LoveLove0o 8 лет назад

      wth did dan Wilson say

    • @nayanshrestha6592
      @nayanshrestha6592 8 лет назад +1

      +Cannabis Informational Videos Appreciate Video! Apologies for the intrusion, I would love your opinion. Have you thought about - Saankramer Revolution Life System (should be on google have a look)? It is an awesome exclusive guide for getting an amazing manifestation of success and wealth minus the headache. Ive heard some incredible things about it and my good mate called Gray got astronomical results with it.

  • @isa_1997
    @isa_1997 6 лет назад +92

    So he's basically saying: if you want to be something in the future, live today in the best way to be that something.
    Now, that's a lesson I've learned some while ago and life keeps confirming it to me. Thanks life.

  • @itsminhbeliever
    @itsminhbeliever 3 года назад +9

    "You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems"

  • @arpitsharma6075
    @arpitsharma6075 Год назад +1

    One of the most basic and honest principle, Thanks Reggie. And yes, I have seen it work.

  • @anshusharma1983
    @anshusharma1983 8 лет назад +253

    There is a verse in Bhagwat Geeta which is a Hindu Scripture. That goes one step further to what the man is saying. The verse says-
    कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन।
    मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भूर्मा ते सङ्गोऽस्त्वकर्मणि॥
    You have the right to perform your actions, but you are not entitled to the fruits of the actions.
    Do not let the fruit be the purpose of your actions, and therefore you won’t be attached to not doing your duty.

    • @anshusharma1983
      @anshusharma1983 8 лет назад +7

      Hey Rock Scripts This is very tricky to grasp. It means that you have the right to do your duties, but your duties are not linked to the fruits of your action. So do your duties, but never expect any results because you have no right over the results. This is the core psychology of detachment and sanyas. We have a saying in hindi "Neki kar dariya mein daal'. that means do your best and then throw your actions in the river.(forget about them)

    • @johnedgard861
      @johnedgard861 8 лет назад +3

      +Anshu Sharma Keep your primitive savage scriptures to yourself.

    • @nipunramani
      @nipunramani 8 лет назад +5

      +Anshu Sharma Yep, there is also Lord Krishna who cited this verse to Arjuna before the battle in which he was fighting against basically his Mentors and Caretakers who nurtured and sharpened him during his childhood.

    • @johnedgard861
      @johnedgard861 8 лет назад +5

      Nipun Ramani Krishna and Arjuna etc does not exist. Your entire 1 billion Hindu gods are all myth. Wake up. Idiots.

    • @nipunramani
      @nipunramani 8 лет назад +6

      Roen Spacy Chill brah, just sharing tit-bits of knowledge. It's something I read in Turning Pro by Steven Pressfield. Great read, pick it up next time you go shopping in non-fiction genre.

  • @Darlagayle
    @Darlagayle 7 лет назад +311

    This seems like it's something obvious but there's just something in the way he says it that enlightened me so much. Thank you!!!!

  • @QueenFynecountry-rs6oh
    @QueenFynecountry-rs6oh 3 месяца назад +1

    Amazing lesson learned.
    Thank you very much TED

  • @true4585
    @true4585 3 года назад +1

    Focus on what you can control not the goal. You will never get to the top of the mountain looking at the top. Fall in love with the process.

  • @danieltonga6052
    @danieltonga6052 9 лет назад +26

    There's a key to this talk that I think is overlooked... He mentioned that when he heard "If you want her to be your girlfriend, you got to ask her yourself," he, in essence, heard, "Yes." Or in other words, he believed that the goal in his head had already been achieved. The speaker here mentions over and over again that if you want to achieve your goal, you need to shift your focus from your goal to your behavior--on what is within your direct control and influence. However, a potential pitfall here is that people lose sight of the goal and focus too much on self-management and change. Without proper guidance and direction in changing our actions, people can overwork themselves or put in too much effort and yield little to no results. It's like putting forth a lot of effort into jogging in place... Wearing the right shoes, eating a good breakfast, getting a good night's sleep, and getting a good stretch in... You're working really hard. But you're going nowhere.
    But once again, the key here is to not "not focus on your goal," but rather, to "believe as if your goal has already been achieved." To see ourselves in the future, having already achieved the goal successfully. This visualization technique is a powerful one that helps outline the path to success, and helps us to see the changes we need to make to become the victor of our goals. This allows us to "focus on our behavior" correctly and in an efficient and productive way that will lead to results. This can easily be related to principles that Stephen R. Covey teaches in "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.": Begin With the End in Mind and Circle of Influence vs. Circle of Concern.

  • @thamestrinity
    @thamestrinity 8 лет назад +39

    10 minutes in my life had never passed so fast

  • @adina9751
    @adina9751 2 года назад +6

    My goal is actually to be discipline. In order to be discipline i have to have a routine in my daily life. Then i break down my other goals into routine. So, on the path of achieving my biggest goal, i also on the path of achieving my other goals. My mindset is to be discipline, i don’t focus on my other goals which i put in my routine. And the goal become a short-term goal. So i feel the achievement every day.
    Whenever i want to follow my desire, i tell to myself that my desire is only a sensation. Meaning, it does not gives you anything except a temporary feeling. Is not really benefits you & following your desire too much only makes you a weak person.
    As a short reminder : you don’t have to have a beautiful goals (from other person’s perspective). As long as it makes you a better person, your goal is beautiful. Surprise other people with a bigger results than your goals that you tell to them.

  • @neeta3322
    @neeta3322 3 года назад +1

    The way you speak is soo amazing. I love the way you are.

  • @mindfreaker300
    @mindfreaker300 9 лет назад +39

    Change yourself first then the goal is coming. Nice talk.

    • @lauratan4392
      @lauratan4392 7 лет назад

      Sam Abu Awww You got the point!!

  • @dendichiu9370
    @dendichiu9370 8 лет назад +26

    “Its like a finger pointing away to the moon. Dont concentrate on the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory.”
    ― Bruce Lee

  • @user-jq5iu9bs5b
    @user-jq5iu9bs5b 2 года назад

    Reggie is so confident. I love it!

  • @JJ-zy3zv
    @JJ-zy3zv Год назад

    this is so true. whenever ive applied this to my own life i've achieved amazing outcomes

  • @iyaphasomfongo7285
    @iyaphasomfongo7285 6 лет назад +72

    This is so legit. We spend too much time wanting outputs but really what builds is the process. Trust the process and focus on it. Look at how to get there. Think about it as becomming a better you then just getting there because I want to be like this etc .

    • @coryr7183
      @coryr7183 Год назад +1

      i recently was wondering whats the process wahts there to do to get thru it ??? anyway good point that it often requires other people often with diff goals

  • @Emma_Ahn
    @Emma_Ahn 7 лет назад +79

    totally agree. the mindset, focusing on behaviors, processes instead of focusing on goals make me try to do new things and motivate myself. besides, I could be more resilient from bad results. love this ted

  • @mjdavis777
    @mjdavis777 7 месяцев назад +2

    I showed this to my freshman class. It's exactly what they needed to hear. Thanks Reggie!

  • @aftersunset3915
    @aftersunset3915 Год назад +1

    this is amazing. I read Atomic Habits and the Power of Habits and then I watch this I realize how important focus to something that we can control and the result is gift from our habits

  • @gianfrancow2850
    @gianfrancow2850 8 лет назад +55

    one of the most beautiful, life changing videos I've seen on youtube.

  • @raj8717
    @raj8717 8 лет назад +28

    he is 100 percent correct it all makes sense

  • @rainonov8667
    @rainonov8667 Год назад

    So great. I'm grateful to hear this talk

  • @lordwelb4161
    @lordwelb4161 2 года назад +1

    You are right.. God bless you

  • @ManojKumar-mw2kv
    @ManojKumar-mw2kv 7 лет назад +26

    A goal is very easy to achieve if you know the path heading towards to goal. The problem with 90 % people is that they don't know exactly the path of destination they want to achieve or they don't stick to it untill they reach to eat. Goal is all about overcoming about path. A goal is final bit or step of your destination. Actually goal starts from the stage where you take first initiative to achieve your goal. Every step determine your goal. So it is more important to stablize yourself on path than being worried about achievement. Think and make an action plan correctly before you start it analysing every strategy and pros and cons of your path. once you start your journey just keep moving ahead. Never be afraid of and be worried about obstacles. Every failure is teach you something which tells you you have done something wrong before and a failure gives you another chance to think and improve. I have more to write but I think it is enough for today.

  • @notesqueries4335
    @notesqueries4335 9 лет назад +19

    Real, lasting growth can come from small changes. I've recently come to understand this and how it has played out in my life. I've seen example after example in my own life of writing down goals and completely forgetting about them only to go back years later and realize that I had achieved those very goals. Not because I had forgotten about them, but because I had focused on the behaviors and not on the outcomes. Focus on behaviors and the outcomes will take care of themselves. Excellent talk!

  • @Angell_Lee
    @Angell_Lee Год назад

    Bless this man, thank you!

  • @tasneemgorach4055
    @tasneemgorach4055 3 года назад +1

    It's like so many people have told us something like this, but the way he says it finally sinks in

  • @LiveProfound
    @LiveProfound 8 лет назад +212

    I was walking around thinking about how to achieve my goals. I decided to watch one of my favourite videos on the topic. I opened my laptop and logged on to youtube. I 'accidentally' clicked somewhere, the page was still loading. My intuition kicked in and something within told me to wait. This was exactly what I needed. Great talk Reggie Rivers! Thank you! :)

  • @invaderz1919
    @invaderz1919 6 лет назад +66

    "Ladies, I'm here."

  • @NinaNaculangga
    @NinaNaculangga 2 года назад +23

    In my opinion, having a goal is important because if a person has a goal then he/she inspire himself to do better things. And other things is there's a lot to do with behaviour. In my experience, 4 years ago my goal is to finish college and today I'm so excited because I'm graduating student so I believe that behaviour is one of the things to focus on too.

  • @sudhanshudeol3149
    @sudhanshudeol3149 4 года назад

    BEST THING I EVER HEARD ON THIS PLANET............hats off to u

  • @Storczie
    @Storczie 9 лет назад +138

    This is great. My goal is to become a pro gamer for esports and my goal is to be good enough to join the pro's. But since i always focus on winning the games which is a 5v5 game, i cant control the people in my team or enemies. When i lose games i feel that i will never reach my dreams. But from now on i wont focus on winning, ill focus on improving and becoming good enough to win games no matter how hard my teammates make it or how good the opponents are. I also suffer from short temper so thats something i could improve on. Thank you!

    • @Storczie
      @Storczie 9 лет назад +3

      Feybred Yes :)

    • @gametangia
      @gametangia 8 лет назад +3

      K -Leif Storcy Haha blaming teammates is the worst you can do. Always focus on yourself, what did I do wrong, what can I do better. teammates are just circumstances you need to work with. If you get carried its great but you should learn how you couldve carried yourself, if you lose you need to think about what you couldve done to give your team a better chance of winning, Its about small advantages. I was stuck in silver for 2 years, and then in 3 weeks (holiday, i played almost 18 hours a day) i got to diamond 2 by focusing on ME. and this is good enough for me i enjoy this level of play. Long story i know but i feel like with my experience it could help you. GL and i hope to see you in the LCS

    • @socccorbot
      @socccorbot 8 лет назад +1

      K -Leif Storcy My goal was diamond. I've been stuck there for 2 years, and then I started not caring about getting there. I just played for fun, (I smoked weed at that point which made me not care) I started rising in elo, and eventually got to diamond, which tbh, was kinda easy. Stay calm control yourself, and motivate yourself and ya teammates, hopefully ill see you in TSM next year xd

    • @abubakarsiddique2447
      @abubakarsiddique2447 8 лет назад

      +K -Leif Storcy hey ,if anyone else wants to learn about ways to reach your goals try Sarparder Subliminal Starter (Have a quick look on google cant remember the place now ) ? Ive heard some awesome things about it and my brother in law got amazing success with it.

    • @mohammedtaibani5090
      @mohammedtaibani5090 7 лет назад

      K -Leif Storcy you should try counter
      -strike GO

  • @nurlisasyahmil7315
    @nurlisasyahmil7315 7 лет назад +83

    I'm very inspired by his talk..gonna focus and think about my behaviour this time..u go girl!

  • @aztec3201
    @aztec3201 2 года назад +1

    So true , never really looked at that way befor , focused on the moves first so you can reach the goal later!!!!

  • @rudygoofysrh
    @rudygoofysrh Год назад

    Thank you for sharing. It always helps to rewatch it and get more clarity.

  • @fazsaeed
    @fazsaeed 5 лет назад +209

    "I am not worried about anything that is outside of my control. I am focused 100% on the part that is in my control. If you want to achieve your goals, don't focus on them. If you want to achieve your goals, you have to focus on the behaviours that are the building blocks, that get you to your goals." - Reggie Rivers

  • @sun.sh.in.e
    @sun.sh.in.e 7 лет назад +71

    THIS WAS AWESOME!!! Very concise and he even threw some humor in there! I enjoyed this talk.

    • @airparris
      @airparris 7 лет назад +2

      Jasmine Jackson agree

    • @loas3967
      @loas3967 4 года назад

      Preach!

  • @phuongthao6679
    @phuongthao6679 3 года назад +1

    this is surely for me... whenever i focus on the goal, i'm always exhausted, like right now. things are getting harder, i just want to give up thinking about the outcome! future is not even happen

  • @vongsokmony9881
    @vongsokmony9881 2 года назад

    Thank you Reggie River !

  • @LessonsInLife
    @LessonsInLife 5 лет назад +34

    “Despite your past, no matter your mistakes or shortcomings, you are an amazing human being, capable of greatness and worthy of happiness.” Andrea Pennington

  • @kkmatt
    @kkmatt 9 лет назад +8

    When I read the title, I was SO in disbelief that he was serious that I clicked on it and watch it immediately. I'm SO happy that I did because what he said is something that I am putting into practice right this minute. And he's hilarious. I love that this was short and to the point and he used a very interesting life example to show explain his idea. Great TEDtalk.

  • @Jerryjustjerry
    @Jerryjustjerry Год назад +15

    First of all, love the presentation😂! And well said, it gives me a new perspective on how to achieve goals, he’s not telling to NOT have a goal or NOT to have plans but focus LESS on your goals. This is a pretty good mindset because in my book, if we focus on our goal, we lower down the efficacy of our behaviour. But this had me thinking, as to what i define goal, anything and can be behaviour, we should actually focus on SMALL goals; in terms of whether you’ve done it irl or not, whether you did control what you can, rather than asking a yes or no question on the BIG goal.

  • @gregorybrian
    @gregorybrian 3 года назад +6

    Excellent. This is quite a Zen approach. The only thing I would say is that focus should be replaced with awareness. Focus feels too much like obsessive control to me. As soon as I try to control my behavior, I get into a fight with myself and I get angrier and angrier until I simply give into a distraction, thus leaving the issue at hand unresolved. My behavior naturally changes as I pay attention to what’s going on without moral judgement. For instance, if I’m aware of how my body feels after eating too much but I reserve good/bad judgement on my eating habits, I eventually conclude “why am I continuing to eat even though my gut is already satisfied? It’s because I haven’t obtained oral pleasure and I keep eating until I am (impossibility) orally satisfied.”

  • @zhonlino
    @zhonlino 8 лет назад +28

    The best speech so far

    • @Mezzykins
      @Mezzykins 8 лет назад +2

      Personally I prefer other ways to think about it. It is great to have goals that you desire and that are measured only by you (ie don't measure to be the fastest sprinter in the world - measure to break the 10 second barrier at 100metre sprints). But, you need to know that everything starts in small steps and you need to plan out how you are going to do it. If you do this and you know you are going to have tough times, then there is nothing you cannot achieve.
      Not having either can set you on the path to failure (1. no goal or a goal given to you by external influences means the path you take may lead you somewhere you don't like. 2 - No plan of action will mean you see a goal as impossible but nothing in life is impossible).
      Balance is the key in all walks of life :)

    • @tjkim688080
      @tjkim688080 8 лет назад

      +Tony O 국민투표를 ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ 국민투표를 잘 할 일이 잘 할 일이 잘 할

  • @gangstersayfock
    @gangstersayfock 6 лет назад +6

    I have watched this talk two years ago and it really inspired me! I really agree with Reggie Rivers! I have learn a lot of this ted talk and I have focussed more on my behavoirs and not my goals. It helped me very much to become more succesfull and look different to live. I focus now more on my own behavoir and my positive habbits. I have benefit a lot of the research of Shawn Achor to become better in that. His "20 second rule" helped me to be better with positive habbits and avoid bad habbits.

  • @abalaji9143
    @abalaji9143 3 года назад +62

    Video in a nutshell
    Bhagavad Gita
    "Do your duty, don't think about end result"

    • @SoniSharma-nm5cc
      @SoniSharma-nm5cc 3 года назад +2

      Karma karo fal ki iccha mat karo

    • @studyyynow6933
      @studyyynow6933 2 года назад +2

      @@SoniSharma-nm5cc karma kro fal ki chinta mt kro

  • @godfreyshimbo4251
    @godfreyshimbo4251 3 года назад +1

    Thank you so much 🙏. Really opened my eyes