13 Karl's Diary - Suzanne's Birthday HQ 2012

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  • Опубликовано: 2 дек 2024

Комментарии • 175

  • @swanky4079
    @swanky4079 5 лет назад +660

    Here’s the thing, Karl’s right about relationships. A lot of people are saying that it’s terrible advice, and that may be true if you’re desperately looking for a partner...but for long term happiness you have to be true to yourself. Changing yourself for someone else may be rewarding at first but eventually it’ll be exhausting, because it isn’t you. Eventually you will see the relationship as work and a lot of the passion goes away when you see a relationship as a chore.
    Well done, Karl. The simple genius.

    • @HeShoeTooBig
      @HeShoeTooBig 3 года назад +22

      Yeah. there are SO many terrible couples out there who need constant help keeping their relationship together. they're clearly wrong for each other and they just force it ether for the kids or some other reason, usually being that's just easier.

    • @kaspernordlund6828
      @kaspernordlund6828 3 года назад +4

      Well honestly carl is saying that he also does tape these shows, so he made a small change to make Zusane happier. That is what both partners should do.
      I picture it as two trees growing in a forest, both have to lean away a little so they both get enough sunlight.

    • @tranidite
      @tranidite 3 года назад +4

      @@kaspernordlund6828 Exactly, you should accommodate your partner but don't try to be something you're not. You both should accommodate eachother in ways that help the other as long as it isn't changing your fundamental self.

    • @philbecker4676
      @philbecker4676 3 года назад

      You're all stupid.

    • @Phoenix1664
      @Phoenix1664 2 года назад

      Its bloody great advice!!

  • @Wingless117
    @Wingless117 7 лет назад +811

    "As soon as it's hard it's not right" damn.... That's so true.

    • @catmagic2226
      @catmagic2226 6 лет назад +6

      Yonnick David gosh the truth is so simple.

    • @muchograndeyolatengo
      @muchograndeyolatengo 6 лет назад +29

      That's not what she said..

    • @thecorruptversion
      @thecorruptversion 5 лет назад +12

      True, if you want a mediocre life inside your comfort zone.

    • @WildBassfly
      @WildBassfly 5 лет назад +24

      Yonnick David so go about your business and see if she joins in... I love that

    • @Humblemumble7
      @Humblemumble7 4 года назад +8

      @@thecorruptversion Mediocre? Compared to what?

  • @mcdouche2
    @mcdouche2 3 года назад +372

    The funniest part that everyone missed is that Karl considers Siamese Twins as “a bloke with two heads on”.

    • @SuplerMarko
      @SuplerMarko 3 года назад +6

      I think he meant more that, the show with 'the bloke with the two heads' was on at the moment

    • @noahmay7708
      @noahmay7708 3 года назад +1

      I think he was talking about the ellephant man

    • @jordanleigh8119
      @jordanleigh8119 3 года назад +1

      The spider sisters?

    • @THICCTHICCTHICC
      @THICCTHICCTHICC 2 года назад +4

      Hopefully they look both ways crossing the road

    • @laurathomas1083
      @laurathomas1083 2 года назад +1

      Nobody missed it 🤷🤷

  • @AJBa83
    @AJBa83 11 лет назад +376

    "He thought he was IT", Panda doing nowt, Ford Sloth, "unless you want fudge"... it's scary how easy it is to agree with Karl as you get older.

    • @obelix7349
      @obelix7349 6 лет назад +11

      steve reads it well...

    • @imarknutt5638
      @imarknutt5638 6 лет назад +7

      AJBa83 Its spelt “Naught” meaning none or nothing. Not trying to be a grammar nazi just letting you know. Cheers!

    • @lyf4pac2biggie
      @lyf4pac2biggie 5 лет назад +18

      @@imarknutt5638 incorrect. nowt is a regional slang word you dickhead

    • @redmille1000
      @redmille1000 5 лет назад +2

      Billy Batson , two different words, just letting you know.

    • @johnwedgbury6817
      @johnwedgbury6817 5 лет назад +1

      it'snot really that scary. ricky's a knob who goes out of his way to tease karl sometimes, just because it's karl

  • @realkingofantarctica
    @realkingofantarctica 4 года назад +195

    I just love the idea that there is a random teenager in the world who got dissed by some random bloke in his diary.

    • @realkingofantarctica
      @realkingofantarctica 4 года назад +1

      Lawn Mower I was trying to age it up to 18 or 19, but saying “an adult” would make this comment confusing

    • @realkingofantarctica
      @realkingofantarctica 4 года назад +1

      Lawn Mower I’m saying at the time that I’m writing this comment, not 2012

  • @irishelk3
    @irishelk3 8 лет назад +508

    I love Karl, and i love the way he lives his life, more than happy to sit down watch a bit of tv and have a few biscuits or do some diy, nothing wrong with that at all, we cant have consistently exciting lives, its about simplicity and Karl has it down to a tee, fair play Karl mate, gent.

    • @rare4403
      @rare4403 7 лет назад +8

      IrishBard well said

    • @ZoraCatone
      @ZoraCatone 5 лет назад +2

      Agreed.
      I also love your avatar.

    • @philbecker4676
      @philbecker4676 3 года назад

      No, it's just because he lacks imagination and he's ignorant and miserable. Jesus, he isn't the Buddha.

    • @littlecommissioner
      @littlecommissioner 2 года назад

      @@abcxyz53 life's about whatever you want it to be about

  • @twoturtlesinabathtub
    @twoturtlesinabathtub 11 лет назад +157

    "There's nothing else...unless you want fudge."
    That made me laugh so fucking hard.

  • @blackngold007
    @blackngold007 11 лет назад +348

    good relationship advice near the end there, even though it was from an unlikely source :)

    • @duroxkilo
      @duroxkilo 4 года назад +10

      @Helmholtz '...go about your business and see if she joins in' is as simple and genial as it gets when it comes to long term relationships... of course, it goes both ways

  • @KRAFTWERK2K6
    @KRAFTWERK2K6 5 лет назад +106

    I think Karl and Suzanne are gonna get VERRRRYY old together.

  • @eazytheog158
    @eazytheog158 2 года назад +20

    Steve reads the diary so well

  • @CopiousDoinksLLC
    @CopiousDoinksLLC 7 лет назад +412

    I like the idea that Suzanne and Karl are perfect for each other because they're both so completely bemused and numbed to every aspect of modern life that they're unable to be perturbed by the others' actions.
    Suzanne: "Yeah, he's lazy and kind of dumb but... eh, whatever."
    Karl: "Yeah, it would be nice if we had more in common and I don't really understand what my role in the relationship is but... eh, whatever."

    • @loveace2430
      @loveace2430 5 лет назад +1

      I like your name and your point.

    • @doxasophosmoros
      @doxasophosmoros 5 лет назад +4

      Yes a sexless relationship is all you can aim.for, so clearly you're trying to relate to it being so sterilized.... lmao
      ....sad.... 🤣🤣🤣 You know fuck all about relationships , and reading your comment was cringeworthy. I shuddered.

    • @EmoPeter2000
      @EmoPeter2000 5 лет назад +49

      @@doxasophosmoros Well Karl and Suzanne have been together for ages and you assumed that it was sexless. All OP said was that they were perfect for each other. You're the one who knows Jack shit about this show and their relationship.

    • @bananamanchester4156
      @bananamanchester4156 4 года назад +10

      @@doxasophosmoros you're in a sexless relationship with virtually everyone on the planet so you're not one to talk lmao

    • @Somebody23
      @Somebody23 4 года назад +4

      @@doxasophosmoros so you find it funny or cringeworthy? you said both sad and lmao in the same comment that I can't tell if you're annoyed or you genuinely find the idea of other's people shortcomings funny.

  • @HRHooChicken
    @HRHooChicken 2 года назад +17

    His relationship advice is seriously good at the end. People pay thousands of £ to hear that. Take heed guys. Don't chase a girl or change for her.

  • @vajrayana4504
    @vajrayana4504 6 лет назад +67

    Haha, I love how fun Ricky has at the carpark scenario.
    "The room overlooked the CARPARK!"
    "nja HAHHAHAHAH"

  • @xxTheJesterxx
    @xxTheJesterxx 5 лет назад +31

    Karl's advice on relationships is right on the money.

  • @cazw179
    @cazw179 5 лет назад +45

    He went to see wildlife and all he got was roadkill 😂😂

  • @omfgacceptmyname
    @omfgacceptmyname 3 года назад +26

    my partner and i actually quite like going through graveyards and reading the tombstones. it's a bit contemplative

    • @BrandiMattison
      @BrandiMattison 3 года назад +3

      Momento mori

    • @bmphil3400
      @bmphil3400 2 года назад +1

      In London they have these old sites next to the tower where it has all these names. And it will say something like ...."Here the 4th Earl of Pembroke died in considerable anguish and pain.....this day....the 12th of July 1647 or something.....it's a little graphic.

  • @jgrillo638
    @jgrillo638 2 года назад +5

    Karl is a legit genius and I love him

  • @LimSky420
    @LimSky420 4 года назад +13

    "I like watching weird stuff and all that...and now and again I won't make her watch it. I'll tape it. But sometimes you just say 'No, come on the bloke with the two heads on I wanna watch it live!' " 😂 Best relationship advice ever....

  • @ashleyjones9704
    @ashleyjones9704 10 лет назад +167

    Am I the only one that thinks Ricky's cartoons looks like Fred Flinstone?

    • @danmancmufc
      @danmancmufc 10 лет назад +36

      It was Ricky's request to create it a bit like the Flintstone's :) x

    • @satiricalhaz-homeofbanter4371
      @satiricalhaz-homeofbanter4371 7 лет назад +21

      Its in the hanna-barbera style similar to the flintstones, the jetsons, scooby doo and the smurfs and stuff like that

    • @doxasophosmoros
      @doxasophosmoros 5 лет назад +2

      Omg that's what you notice? You 45 year old obese big chin ? Omg I'm laughing so hard

    • @doxasophosmoros
      @doxasophosmoros 5 лет назад

      Yes a sexless relationship is all you can aim.for, so clearly you're trying to relate to it being so sterilized.... lmao
      ....sad.... 🤣🤣🤣 You know fuck all about relationships , and reading your comment was cringeworthy. I shuddered.

    • @doxasophosmoros
      @doxasophosmoros 5 лет назад +1

      Omg lolllllllllll

  • @LisaODavis
    @LisaODavis 11 лет назад +35

    "Posh hangers with foam on them".

  • @Fluttershyer_
    @Fluttershyer_ 7 лет назад +91

    The thing with them counting the age of the dead person in the graveyard. I do that too if ever I am currently in the graveyard watering the grave and taking care of my not so living relative. You know, putting flowers on their deathbed or whatever. And afterwards I go and have have a look at all the different tombstones. Its sort of a game almost.

    • @johnwhittington2998
      @johnwhittington2998 7 лет назад +9

      Princecid yea. Same when I went to the graveyard when I was like 9 I saw this small old grave and I lost my Shit when I found out one bloke was born in 1802

    • @gemstonegynoid7475
      @gemstonegynoid7475 5 лет назад +2

      My dad is buried with a rather basic headstone. Merely a slab on the ground really. And most of the graves in this cemetery are like that. But there are a few rather posh graves with headstones as big as a car. And some of them are couples graves. Where one bloke has his name and dates on, and the spouse has their name and birthday on. What im wonderin is what if the spouse remarries?

    • @BNK2442
      @BNK2442 3 года назад

      I used to visit graveyards. I took pictures the lastbtime I was in one. :-P

    • @SamuelBlack84
      @SamuelBlack84 Год назад

      @@BNK2442 Any ghosts?

  • @TheSilverWolf1998
    @TheSilverWolf1998 4 года назад +9

    I'm happy he found a wife that really must love him to be with him so long

  • @dolphin8815
    @dolphin8815 3 года назад +13

    Karl somehow always puzzles you with the actual logic he brings. Right after tellin a story about tasting rhinos poo.

  • @DeadlyNightShade60
    @DeadlyNightShade60 3 года назад +6

    Karl: I don't see the point in going out in large numbers.
    2020/21: Seems like good advice.

  • @MOO67204
    @MOO67204 3 года назад +3

    "Go about your business see if she joins in" - words to live by

  • @ckpemac5268
    @ckpemac5268 3 года назад +3

    Ricky's continuous giggles are adorable. He is in his fourties here and I am seventeen. I don't care.

  • @DarkAutumn3D
    @DarkAutumn3D 2 года назад +2

    1:12 Ricky's "OH THE IRONY!!!" laugh sums it all up 😂😂

  • @josephmarrison4606
    @josephmarrison4606 5 лет назад +7

    I can relate to Karl. I sometimes find other people annoying when I am eating in a restaurant.

    • @TheRuddster95
      @TheRuddster95 3 года назад +1

      Yeah people infuriate me there too

  • @georgeamos1271
    @georgeamos1271 3 года назад +7

    Karl’s advice on relationships is what made me split with my ex - true story

    • @shoeshiner9314
      @shoeshiner9314 2 года назад +2

      I went through a similar revelation with my own. I didn't know how to describe it but karl worded it perfectly

    • @iiqspat2629
      @iiqspat2629 Год назад

      Did she not let you watch bloke with two heads live? 😂

  • @yehoshuasmith5608
    @yehoshuasmith5608 3 года назад +5

    "If it's hard, then it's not right..." pretty sound relationship advice to me

  • @91walshy
    @91walshy 2 года назад

    I play the church graveyard game too and I love fudge so I'd have loved that trip to the cotswolds

  • @muir2809
    @muir2809 4 года назад +10

    Rickys laugh is the cure for depression

  • @RealClassixX
    @RealClassixX 4 года назад +5

    Karl: "I drank dome coffee.'
    Ricky: _WHEEEEZE_

  • @davidrule385
    @davidrule385 2 года назад +1

    That Ford Sloth moment is still one of my favourite funny parts from this show.

  • @jeepz669
    @jeepz669 2 года назад

    These are gold I tell ya!

  • @maymayth3n
    @maymayth3n 5 лет назад +8

    My partner and I actually do frequently go to graveyards to see how old the dead people are lol

    • @frankhinstine4552
      @frankhinstine4552 3 года назад +1

      Yes, there is a certain excitement when finding a really old grave or the plot of someone famous..

  • @THICCTHICCTHICC
    @THICCTHICCTHICC 2 года назад +2

    Ricky makes a joke about the Vauxhall Slug.... But there is actually a Nissan S-Cargo (Escargot) which literally looks like a snail.

  • @rejectbedward8000
    @rejectbedward8000 4 года назад +1

    His diary entries are like poetry

  • @him050
    @him050 3 года назад +2

    My ex would only buy the ridiculously expensive, triple layered, quilted toilet paper. It was like wiping your arse with a 13 tog duvet, absolutely horrendous.

  • @swayampattnaik4858
    @swayampattnaik4858 3 года назад +3

    3:24 - 3:32 best bit

  • @burnsyboyy7534
    @burnsyboyy7534 7 лет назад +31

    Unless you want fudge. LOL!!!!!!

  • @drauslucas491
    @drauslucas491 6 лет назад +3

    LMAO, I love this fucking show!!

  • @SlyRy
    @SlyRy 7 лет назад +10

    3:22

  • @urbanrider403
    @urbanrider403 3 года назад +1

    Too true Karl,we don’t go sky diving,wind surfing and nip off to the Caribbean all the time do we

  • @joshuamorrison8332
    @joshuamorrison8332 Год назад +2

    "there's nothing else.. unless you want fudge" Karl must know how funny he is but he never lets on so we are left to wonder.

  • @CrazyFreak714
    @CrazyFreak714 5 лет назад +3

    Sometimes, no come on, bloke with the 2 heads i wanna watch it live 😄

  • @jamesjameo8571
    @jamesjameo8571 3 года назад +1

    ‘He thought he was IT!’

  • @callum110597
    @callum110597 Год назад +1

    Gosh, so much to do with Suzanne, and Karl had to live up with her and treat her well! 😄

  • @thecanadiandane7262
    @thecanadiandane7262 3 года назад +1

    I’ve never seen cartoon Larl smile about anything until this clip, I’m not sure I like it-

  • @lol-pz1ni
    @lol-pz1ni 2 года назад +1

    karl Pilkington is a genius

  • @thomasshaftoe461
    @thomasshaftoe461 7 месяцев назад +1

    What About a beetle snail 🐌?

  • @daibonehead
    @daibonehead 2 года назад

    Karl and I agree about a lot of things.

  • @josey6231
    @josey6231 Год назад

    "People say they go to the country to see the wildlife. I saw rabbits, pheasants & a fox on the way home. They were all dead in the road"
    That is actually incredibly profound. Sounds like just a joke but it touches on the fact that civilization is destroying nature.
    It's something I imagine Diogenes would say if he could see modern times.

  • @pillarsofdoom4891
    @pillarsofdoom4891 4 года назад +1

    Scrimpton,! So quick

  • @idontdovarioustasks
    @idontdovarioustasks 7 месяцев назад +1

    Unless you want fudge lol

  • @p.t.a
    @p.t.a 4 года назад +1

    Amazing😂

  • @ramblinevilmushroom
    @ramblinevilmushroom 3 года назад +1

    did HQ in 2012 mean 240p?

  • @MyoclonicJerkCough
    @MyoclonicJerkCough 6 лет назад +18

    As someone who has to wipe after peeing... the cheapo toilet paper can leave teeny paper fibers all over, and if they get in your pee passage it friggin burns. Scott toilet tissue I'm looking at you 😠😠

    • @benjaminfacouchere2395
      @benjaminfacouchere2395 6 лет назад +4

      Or you afford yourself the luxury of a bidet, that's exactly what they're for.
      If I may quote from wiki:
      "From an environmental standpoint, bidets can reduce the need for toilet paper, saving households money on paper products and allowing users to reduce their carbon footprint by reducing their paper waste over time.[1][3] Considering that an average person uses only 1/8th gallon of water for cleansing using a bidet, much less water is used compared to the amount of water required to make toilet paper. An article in Scientific American concluded that using a bidet is "much less stressful on the environment than using paper."
      Source: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bidet

    • @Berttttt
      @Berttttt 5 лет назад

      Fuck up you melt

  • @chrisbirch6513
    @chrisbirch6513 2 года назад

    Go about your business and see if she joins in is actually excellent advice.

  • @spinny003
    @spinny003 3 года назад +1

    HD=240p

  • @haydnwood5300
    @haydnwood5300 3 года назад

    Am I in control of my brain or is my brain in control of me

  • @onehandednedned6673
    @onehandednedned6673 День назад

    In hospital?

  • @ItsEdboy
    @ItsEdboy 5 лет назад +3

    Guys guys you're making it too complicated, an easier way to get a straight answer is to ask either guard "Which way is up?"
    Depending on who you ask they'll easily reveal who they are because they either tell the truth or tell lies.

    • @adam79634
      @adam79634 5 лет назад +2

      wrong video mate

  • @NickC-Ohio
    @NickC-Ohio 2 года назад

    "it shouldn't be hard; as soon as it's hard, it's not right." For a moment I thought that sounded insightful but then I realized it's infantile asf.

  • @betholivia99
    @betholivia99 6 лет назад +6

    I don’t think Karl would be the sort of person to keep a diary..?

    • @wallytomlins
      @wallytomlins 4 года назад +1

      There was an episode where he explained his thought process for starting. The other dudes probably encouraged him to keep writing.

  • @therealfinnaspring8585
    @therealfinnaspring8585 3 года назад +3

    I'm genuinely concerned at everyone who thinks this is good advice lol "as soon as its hard its not right" there are always times its hard just like anything but if its right it passes you work through it and it gets better. You and your partner will continue to change through out your life and there are growing pains and adjusting to the changes can be hard for everyone. Relationships aren't stagnate or they shouldn't be.

    • @evoke97
      @evoke97 2 года назад +1

      na karls advice is bang on

  • @LetsChatGrace
    @LetsChatGrace 8 лет назад +12

    3:08😂😂😂😂

    • @dhadad9885
      @dhadad9885 5 лет назад

      grace's camera roll you look pretty!

  • @MorphingReality
    @MorphingReality 5 лет назад +2

    classic

  • @olivergille8305
    @olivergille8305 3 года назад

    The story about the Cotswolds with it's witty observations wouldn't be out of place in the tight 5 of an experienced comedian, but Karl just adlibs/scrawls it in the diary off the cuff

    • @jamesmortimer6007
      @jamesmortimer6007 2 года назад

      Karl's the comedian's comedian, and a comedic genius at that. His style is simple and mundane but I'm convinced it's backed by a keen intellect.

  • @codydavidyates72
    @codydavidyates72 4 года назад +1

    My dairy'd be sadder than his, so

  • @yannik246
    @yannik246 4 года назад

    "HQ"

  • @manxpuss
    @manxpuss 5 лет назад +20

    My car is behaving like a Ford Sloth at the moment.

  • @jasonstone8587
    @jasonstone8587 5 лет назад

    Great Audio. ....there's some shit out there.

  • @randomuploadsism
    @randomuploadsism 5 лет назад

    press 4 for rickys laugh

  • @Marcelo83uk
    @Marcelo83uk 3 года назад

    Pilkington don't mess about... if the women don't keep in line he kicks them to the kerb!

  • @joshuhahodkinson232
    @joshuhahodkinson232 4 года назад

    Que in the fiat panda

  • @schmay3312
    @schmay3312 4 года назад +1

    This has to be scripted

  • @BewareTheRising
    @BewareTheRising 11 лет назад +8

    I'm 16 and feel the same way mate aha

    • @bigal640
      @bigal640 6 лет назад +13

      BewareTheRising
      Hello mr 21 year old

    • @homocidal1862
      @homocidal1862 5 лет назад

      Hello mr 22 yr old

    • @benarmstrong6904
      @benarmstrong6904 4 года назад +1

      Congratulations, you two can count

    • @LFP_btc
      @LFP_btc 2 года назад

      hello 24 year old

  • @grease_monkey6078
    @grease_monkey6078 4 года назад +1

    We did the usual thing... Going round the Graveyard seeing how old the dead people are.
    I can relate, my Dad used to take me and my sister to graveyards to do the exact thing, weird innit

  • @el6178
    @el6178 4 года назад +1

    Coronation street perspective. Its miserable and it s not funny. It s slightly amusing only if you travel the globe multiple times like Rick has and you find some joy in couch potato observations because you fed up with adventure and glamour.

  • @somethingcliched4921
    @somethingcliched4921 5 лет назад

    69

  • @swim_ad
    @swim_ad 5 лет назад

    He's gonna ta k e you back the past...to play the shitty games that suck ass...

  • @rejectbedward8000
    @rejectbedward8000 4 года назад +1

    His diary entries are like poetry