Yes!!! Best advice: slow down. Work on your inner child wounds so you won’t need external validation. And ALWAYS trust your intuition. Your body will tell you if a person is wrong for you.
Best line in this vid, Lee: "You can't heal in the same environment that made you sick." I stopped and said, "THAT'S SO RIGHT!" I am currently (like, over the past few days) doing everything I can to stand my ground, put my foot down, draw a line in the sand, [fill in the blank/you get the idea] with the narcissist in my life. He's resisting hard, and may well tell me to take a hike as a result of my pushing back on his need for total control ... but I am determined to show up for myself again, finally. Thanks again for your eye-openers! : )
He seriously asked what can he do to "help" me heal, and I told him, "How can I heal from the hands of the same person who hurt me?" Needless to say, that triggered him, caused an argument, now the tables have been turned, and I'm insensitive and ungrateful because I refused his "help". I'm still not OK.
I'm glad to have a word for what I'm going through. I made him leave, and I won't let him back if he doesn't do what I need him to work on. In 2020 I broke down and told my best friend what I was going through, she mentioned he sounds like a covert narcissist... I cried for days researching because I have an answer to why he's different and I'm miserable. Thank you for sharing your story and insight, it really helps people like me. God Bless you.
"I cried for days researching because I have an answer to why he's different and I'm miserable." I so feel you. Here's some guy, a Narcissist himself, talking about this disorder and his therapy. It might help you guys. God bless you. ruclips.net/video/CTJeec2DA-U/видео.html
Still in this. It's hell. I've been discarded but the pattern started early on in the relationship. You end up trauma bonded for a long time after it ends. It's a nightmare to break.
Thanks for saying that Lisa! I’m only a month and a half out. It is a nightmare. I’m exhausted and doing everything I can. I am curious since you wrote this 3 mths ago how you are now and if you have any advice
Leaving is hard, but eventually it does get better. I broke it off recently after a year of seeing someone, where I saw a culmination of these narcissistic traits. It was hard and I had a mixture of emotions (e.g., missing the person, regret, anger, etc.) while also replaying the dynamics of the relationship. However, the time apart provided more confirmation that I was doing the right thing and my life has improved in the process. I saw these videos after my breakup which further confirmed that my decision to leave was for the best.
I'm 5 weeks without my narc, I'm feeling so empty and lost without them, I'm aware of all I've been put through yet still I'm missing them!! How stupid is that . I'm so messed up
I am too ashamed and cannot put my close friends and family through the vicious cycle he puts me through. They're tired of hearing the same thing -- how he'd hurt me, I'd fall apart at the seams, they'd listen & be there and invest in helping me heal, only for me to go running back to him.
I have similar situation. My mom and brother helped me get out a few times and I mean drove through states to help me pack and go back home all for me to get back. Now that I finally know what is going on and the empty promises are just that no one wants to help. My mom said go volunteer and get out of the house like that’ll change. My health is so bad and getting worse ugh. Now I regret not staying away back in 2015.
This was MUCH needed!! I’m dealing with a covert narcissist. A whole action is different than their words kind of person.An authentic goal post mover. I’m tired of the trauma bond. I had to put him out while he was at work after being caught emotionally cheating and sexting with a chick ..but calling her a friend. I need to get off this hamster wheel.
Now imagine, you are both. I finally quitted the "relationship", *cough "friendship" after more than 20 years. I can confirm, you are addicted, as well as exhausted like hell, yet, it's such a good feeling knowing this and getting immune.
There is security in Hell. You've 'Been there, done that" and you only know how to deal with/survive that what you've previously experienced. Change is terrifying. But, Change is also enlightening, motivating and empowering. Abusers love stagnancy. Embrace change.
It’s true that I never felt so comfortable with someone like I was with him. He became the male version of me! Then BOOM!!! I started seeing the red flags but by this time I’ve moved my whole house in his apartment. So I began planning to move my belongings out(he sold all his furniture that was infested with bed bugs, yep sold it instead of throwing it away…trifling) I was addicted to him because of the extra affection. Well now that I know his life is doomed to hell, it’s easier for me to detach. I’m progressing as he declines.
@ LovinMe Lake best move you ever made. Leaving him. They are the same, will always be the same. My ex has a stinky moldy leather jacket that he cannot even fit into BUT he insists upon keeping it. If they do get rid of something, they want $$$ for it. It is just mental
@@cher8136 they are disgusting vile individuals. Like I’ve said before, a person doesn’t know how miserable they are until they get out of the miserable situation. To go back to that is asking to die a dreadful death. I’m ecstatic that I left.
@@livinmylife5025 Me too! Leaving him was so easy at that point because he was so miserable. I don't miss his unhappy face AT ALL. His nasty words or nasty disposition. He will be a crotchety old man no doubt
@@cher8136 it’s ironic you mentioned his unhappy face, I too went through that. He looks older than what he is and he was always unpleasant to look at but I was attracted to him in the beginning and didn’t know why. Of course I know why now. I had to get to a point of knowing I’m not missing out on anything dealing with him. I constantly remind myself of the conversations I had with some of his exes. We all share similarities. I will never go back. EVER! I’m thankful for this platform to vent.
@@livinmylife5025 Like you, I was so relieved to find out what I was dealing with period. I knew nothing about NPD. And throw in depression with that too....he was a walking nightmare. He never wanted to get help. I tried pushing for him to get help for his depression but for a narcissist to admit there is ANY kind of problem, is a problem. I was with him an embarrassing total of 18 years. Married 10 of them. Like you, I would never go back. We both had ex's prior and I know she would never go back. They had kids together so in many ways it was probably worse for her. His oldest daughter is a narcissist as well. Big shocker there huh? When I met her she was this sweet kid. Not any more
I don't understand how we can avoid these ppl before it's too late. I'm still in a lot of pain n really feel alone n like ppl don't understand. It's kind of like a ache that doesn't go away... Anyone who dealing with or has stay strong n keep God first
I remember when my mother told me not to leave my ex husband. She said he just needed some one to deeply love him. At this point I'd had enough and said "why don't YOU love him then if he's so wonderful then"? and we both fell about laughing 😂😂😂 But on a more serious note I had a therapist tell me that if you want to begin to break the trauma bond you have to literally use aversion techniques like if you think they talk too much. Try to imagine him/her literally talking vomit or diarrhea 🤮💩🤮💩🤮 imagine the stench and use as much detail as you can. If you use this imagery when they try to sweet talk/love bomb you..... Believe me you won't want to kiss them or have them anywhere near you again 😜😜. Good luck 😃✌🏾
My situation was different. My mom helped me get away a few times and move in with her the last time she helped me find a house and I let my husband come back. Now I finally realized what is going on she tells me to go volunteer and get out of the house more😢 this time I actually am more than ready. I’m in physical pain and my health is so bad I can even work at the moment so I’m trying to get my own plan together now. Basically my family got tired of me taking him back and it sucks but it’s my fault.
@@bean8354 try not to be too hard on yourself. I'm not sure any of us get away on the first attempt, I know I didn't. Usually it's a case of running out of options that does it and it sounds like you might be there. Also do not ignore your own health! I did that too and years later I've been diagnosed with Multiple sclerosis ...... I always used to say that he got on my nerves 😂😂. I try not to dwell on the past but they literally suck the life from you if you let them. Good luck, things can only get better if you focus on loving your self 🌞✨🌈💜
Lee I've been watching you for almost a year I think, and if I hadn't been told about you by my daughter, I wouldn't be strong enough right now to be leaving this situation. I want to thank you so much for being so strong and brave. I wish everybody with this disorder could I have enough bravery to try and fight it. Because the pain it causes isn't just one person in my life it is an entire community my entire family and every friend I've ever had. And my children. So and that's just one man. So thank you for being self aware and for helping everyone thank you so much.
He does makes it hard to break up completely. Even after all the cheating and lying years of emotional abuse, we are still together. He is seeking therapy. Appreciate your honesty Lee. I am learning that I am trauma bond.
An actual self aware narcissists providing advice/ counseling to the survivors you could be charging so much more…The energy & info you’re giving is priceless
I was on and off for 9 years with my ex narc and we have an 8 year old and now a 3 month old. I left in the beginning of my pregnancy. He begged for me to come back and now all of a sudden he's in a whole new relationship. I gotta keep telling myself that it doesn't matter what I feel for the moment I and my kids need to get a chance at a healthy and happy life. Thank you for these videos. It just reassure that I made the right decision.
What a constructive way for a real narcissist to get the supply/ affirmation he needs! I say this in love and sincerity! God bless your soul! Thank you God for showing him a constructive way to get affirmation that he’s good. Maybe that’s the remedy to reverse the curse! 🙌🏾✨
Good teaching once again! You do have to cut them off...COMPLETELY to break the bond, and you do have to get comfortable with being ALONE. Scary at first, but after a while you'll notice a beautiful peace!
thank you ! you are helping so many people, when you said music, it is a trigger , I force myself to remember the worst visit, and how I felt , also your quote " sweep you off your feet quickly is to drop u on your head" on point !!
Best channel on narcissism, right from the horses mouth! Giving me clarity and encouragement to keep a deeply wounded person out of my life so that I can heal
The whole time I’m listening I’m just thinking wow. I needed this so bad. I’ve been watching your tik tok for a while but I’ll definitely be coming to your RUclips now.
This is the best description of trauma bonding I have heard yet. The addictive power of the removal of the punishing behaviors of the devaluing stages of the narcissistic relationship is effectively what psychologists call negative reinforcement--which is not "punishing" as the opposite of reward. It is the removal of continuous punishment by--in the case of trauma bonding-- the introduction of reward--and therein you develop the addiction to the person. Negative reinforcement is the strongest of all the conditioning behaviors (stronger than reward alone or of punishment alone), and here it is in the trauma bonding process. WOW!
This is helping me so much. I used to beat myself up inside every time I went back but I literally could not help myself. Knowing exactly what I was going back to and the emotional abuse I would endure... but still going back. Now I know why and how I can move forward. Thank you, sending many blessings to you and yours 🙏
@@MentalHealness whenever I try to set forth healthy boundaries for the relationship my husband agrees . And then goes and plays by his own set of rules. I nearly left a year ago. He changed for awhile and now it is worse.
Grey rock if you stay. A boundary is something you set. Much like a child, if you allow the boundary to be crossed without consequence, the child will push further the next time. No chasing, no discussion, no pining no fawning. Just.Stop.Everything. if they get pissy, let them stew in their own piss. Not your problem.
Best advice ever! Once I began journaling every single instance of abuse and neglect I was able to step further back from the bad situation. It helped to help me break the bond with the toxic person who was controlling my life. Reading back through the journal helped in the process as well as I was able to see the progression of abusive and how much worse he became while I became healthy again. It helped to regain my self esteem.
I’m so happy the Trauma Bond doesn’t work on me anymore. I died when he said “You wanna leave? Let’s have a baby! You wanna leave again? Let’s have ANOTHER BABY!” 😂😂😂💀
I wanted another baby for years my ex refused because he struggled parenting the 2 we had. Fair enough. But after I demanded divorce.. he begged to have another baby. Can’t make this. Shit. Up.
I got sick...like I was coming off the worst drug imaginable. My body hurt, my stomach hurt, I couldn't focus, I looked for other things to feel better. Most insane thing I've ever been through. You're right. Study, pick your hard and move forward.
Lee Hammock!!! Thank you for these videos. I thought i knew it all. To not romanticize my fucked up marriage has been my challenge for over 5 months. That's how long my husband has been gone/dead and today i feel my reality, my truth. Exactly what the therapist has been trying to help me with. Long, long journey for me because he suffered n i watched. Over 25 years n he was hard core, not to be fucked with. Writing and watching videos has been giving me that validation to see exactly how fucked up of a human being he really was. Going back and rereading what i write seems like it's someone else's life. Thank you for letting go of your pride, just enough pride to do these videos. Pride can be bad but good to. You just don't know the difference this is making in my life right now. A thousand times over, Thank You.
People need to realize how valuable this information is 🙏 I would have given anything to know about narcissism and sociopathy when I was with my abuser. I could have been the one to walk away rather than get discarded. I wouldn’t blame myself. I would understand what gaslighting is and that I’m not losing my mind or forgetting things. I wondered what was wrong with me I went to therapy. I got on medication it wasn’t my fault it never was…
Thank you so muuuuch for making these videos! They are sooooooo helpful and I would love to see the narcs in my family and surroundings to be like you, to share info and make amends.
First off, thank you so much for sharing and being vulnerable with us all. I've been watching your videos now for a week or so and it's been therapy for me big time. I've gotten more help from your videos than from any doctors viewpoints or videos. I've always been put off by the whole attack on people that are on some level or full blown Narcissist can not love, can not feel, and they launch their attacks which in turn causes more trauma because it invalidates those things you know are for a fact real feeling and emotions in the Narcs in our lives and then makes me question myself. I do believe my husband has real pain, real fears, real sorrow, but like you mentioned ..... your brain shuts it down and changes into the other mode for whatever reason. Only God's opinion of us matters in life and the real gift is the Peace that Jesus left us along with his Holy Spirit which is our true counsel when we accept Jesus as Lord. There are so many many amazing traits my husband has, but his mouth, and addictive personality disorder, along with all this Narcissist manipulation is just too much and after 21 years of marriage done. My fear for not leaving recently is because I do believe I'm trauma bonded, and once I leave and if he decides to changes like you have, praise God (many prayers for you and your family to remain strong and blessed), I'm just scared that I know once I'm out and I choose the Hard of leaving and detoxing that if he does om fact truly change I'll never trust him and I'll never take him back. I see all the potential like you said, and it exhausts me to even think about trying to play along and I just can't ask anyone to play a game or them to play one with me. Sad, we have an amazing 18 year old son together and he moved out because he couldn't deal with it anymore. I believe we all need to learn to be okay with being alone & enjoy it. Now that I spent time getting to know God because he's chased me down for years and he knows me, now I have so much peace and I don't have to live with trusting anyone even myself, because only God is truth, even we lie to ourselves. So anyway, thank you. I truly feel like God has allowed you to go through this to make you stronger and to help others.
Different types of trauma bonds. Not sure what to call it but when the Narc does or says the worst things possible to you on memorable moments. Like fight you after a funeral or on your birthday… This is so every time you think of the funeral or birthday you’ll think of them, for the most part forever. And they know it.
Wow thank you. That helps a lot. I always tried to get an apology or some peace or some forgiving with that people that did that to me. I didn't get it, it just became worse and worse. I also felt like disconnecting with the world and being just for and with myself brought the most healing. Even though somehow I felt addicted to the trauma bond and the pain already... It made me feel alive somehow. Feeling that pain and desperation. I wanted to be seen with my pain inside... I wanted others to see my pain and then take it away from me. I wanted those people to see it, that did that to me. They never saw anything. They never realized what they have done to me. But my sister deserves something better then some desperate crying person addicted to the pain and desperation. Oh I have some problems for sure.... Caught in trauma bonding.... I better cut myself off. My just completely with myself and for myself and find the happyness within me again and my joy for the world and for life.
Lee, you are so right. I tried to help a survivor. But she couldn't understand why he didn't "want her anymore" I tried to tell her he is not concerned about you, you need to move on. Power up as you say!
You are speaking my life right now!!! It does get better over time.... it's extremely important to go no contact because they know you too well and they will use your wants and needs against you...😮💨 I love this channel especially this particular video because it's LIBERATING!!!!💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
It's the wounded inner children bonded ... Took me a long time to realize that. Im bpd diagnosed and I kept trrrryyyyyying to tell narcissist there is reason that we draw to each other 1. The bpd and npd drawing annnnnnnnndddd then one day it hit me it's our broken little selves. I hate it but I will fight that bond until my death. No more. I see it all and whole situation just bad for me. Don'e with it.
Ps I love the smell of gas ... And I don't even listen to my playlist any more. I let that radio play song come on we like I change it. I don't go to any places we have in common. Don't talk to no people in common. Luckily I had about 15 weeks of no contact. Currently they try testing waters and I just don't even emote I just say done is done.
I have had the same thought on the wounded inner children bonding together. I don’t think a personality disorder is needed to experience this. Just two wounded inner children can. Just a thought.
@@bowpow00 I've had personality disorder since I was child ... Conduct disorder that developed into bpd. I would image there would have to be some type of trauma and object relations issues to tolerate such behavior.
THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR SHARING I HAVE BEEN TRAUMA BONDED TO AN OVERT NARCISSTIS FOR OVER 8 YEARS.I KNOW THAT THIS PERSON IS NO GOOD HE ABUSES ME HE CALLS ME HORRIBLE NAMES. HE COMES AROUND ONLY 2 USE ME.THEN HE DISCARDS ME AND GIVES ME THE SILENT TREATMENT. TRAUMA BONDING IS DANGERS.
I have been ghosted for about a week now but each time I feel the need to text or call I stop and listen to one of these videos. I deleted the number so I won’t be tempted anymore. I will be deleting the message as soon as it gets to my phone once he tried to come back. Always with some bullshit apology. And then tells me he misses me or loves me or some shit. I do not see him anymore on a daily basis and got myself away so I could heal. This dude is so full of shit I can’t even. I broke the trauma bond but sometimes I get that anxiety. It’s so hard but I know I have to do it to be truly happy. Thanks for your videos they really help me relate.
Everytime i got away yo ttry and straighten my head out, they either love bombed me or emotiinally manipulated me by telling me there where depressed or suicidal. In the end i sussed it all out and finally got away. So much projection as well. The list goes on. You give your alll and get nothing in return. I stood up to mine for quite a long time and they couldnt handle the truth and never wanted to take responsibility for their actions. Told them my boundaries as a decemt human being who is supposed to be in a healthy loving relatiionship and everytime they overstepped them, i let them know. It's a long crazy story. In the end I got so exhausted with trying and having to stand up for myself and all the gasligthing and ghosting etc. Then they do the classic discard. On principle it makes you mad at them, let alone the hurt from putting your heart in. How could somebody do all this to me. Answer, because they are an evil self centres dusgusting narcasist. What they don't realise now is that they've shot themselves in the foot . Because this chicken has woken up and is not oing back. Too much self respect to put myself through any more of that shit. But it hasnt been easy getting to this point. Just get away and let yourself fall back together if you can. Even if you plan your escape slowly. The narc will know your up to something but dint say anythung. You can bet your bottom dollar that they will ramp up the discard or all the other shit that they pull, if they cotton on. Fact is that if you have attracted a narc into your life, it's because you are the cream of humanity and one of the best most careing compassionate empathetic people and believe in truth and integrity. Which is why the narcs world of lies and deciept can send you into a crazy fog of gognative disonance. They rely on your true ferelngs as a good hunan and that's what hooks you in there. Its your precious heart. that they get you hooked in by. Narsassist only choose the best, so don't forget that. Wishing everybody all the very best. And good luck with this crazy Jig saw puzzle.
Holy shit...I have been strict no contact with the covert nasty narc for over two years. I'm doing the inner work, and have healed a great deal, but I am learning more from you than any doctor! I'm freaking the f out!!!
Yes bond was so strong I think for my narcissistic x husband as well. One day after beat me till unconscious he said this is our marriage I’m going to abuse you. Even said he would kill me in angry not fell remorse. I will not take no blame everything is your fault even if I have bad day. Your kind an sweet to sensitive except it. Three days later made coffee food stared jar changed he was at work. I drove to whole another state with 80 nothing else filed police report. I left with nothing had big house job life. Started all the way over. I left more than 7 times this time I did not go back. I felt sick like withdrawing from crack him. I felt he was sick to ask me to come home I did not. I’m free all cycle happened end smear campaign him trying to destroy me he could not destroy child god. I forgive him I prayed for him. Thank you for your insight helping others set free an cope mr lee
Yes. Literally. The first time I left long term (a year and a bit). I left the province. Complete no contact. I was acting crazy the first few days. I hid in the closet.
@@Picca65 I think he does.. but how can I be certain? Maybe I’m projecting. Maybe when I think he’s love bombing me, I’m actually love bombing him. Maybe I don’t know. If I was a covert narcissist I would think it’s his fault even if it is my own.
I thought this through and I see how both parties can get killed by that behavior the narcissist has. No offense because I know everyone has some of it in them! I think that would be a great video, how would a narc get away from a narc!?
I tried dating after him and the new guy started showing some of his traits n it immediately put me in chase mode. I ruined two great relationships bc of how scared I was to feel like I was at someone’s will like that again
Whew! A word! After 16 years of divorce, I'm still trauma bonded. We had a kid together, after I left and came back, and left for good. I stay away from relationships.
That's so incredibly sad.. Everyone deserve love and a companion to share their lives with..When I hear this it hurts because essentially the narcissism has won.... Don't give up on love because a disordered individual hurt you.
@@MentalHealness If you can't heal in the same environment that made you sick,then how can your family heal...I find that if you change you,you can change how you react to your family environment,etc....That gives your family a fighting chance...
I am currently stuck in another 9 months lease with him we have 2 kids together and i told him that we cant afford where we stay so we are going to have to leave here he didnt text me back his daughter that lives with us hasnt spoken to me in almost a week i did learn alot about him but now i dont know the lies vs. Truth
Because of the trauma bond, I know what addiction feels like. I pushed through the other side with all my strength and know after THAT experience I can overcome anything. It was a very dark challenging time that I knew that breaking that chain was all apart of my awakening. My dear Lord...🙏🏽❤ Wow! Smh. So thankful & grateful for leaving immediately. 😊
@ Monica Benjamin Narcissists are attracted to empaths. People who are caring and can be intuitive. The narcissist will try to brake your spirit. You are nothing but an appliance, an object to the Narc. It’s a game to them to see how far and how much emotional pain they can inflict. Some Narcs can behave like dark triads. This type of behavior is considered: Cold Blooded. 🩸
Whats up mr lee since the consultation He still calling now its restricted i dont answer still shaking my head continuing no contact no communication whatsoever. Its gone get real when my phone go off to actually break the trauma bond. I got to be real with myself like every time i see his number my chest hurt like my stomach is queasy even though i haven't talked to him in weeks he tryna soften me up the games i played with him has came to haunt me i think my chest flutters now. You right every thing is a trigger. Im going thru withdrawals frfr.
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Yes!!! Best advice: slow down. Work on your inner child wounds so you won’t need external validation. And ALWAYS trust your intuition. Your body will tell you if a person is wrong for you.
☝ this right there is right on!
Truth
All of this! I just told my therapist this.
Best line in this vid, Lee: "You can't heal in the same environment that made you sick." I stopped and said, "THAT'S SO RIGHT!" I am currently (like, over the past few days) doing everything I can to stand my ground, put my foot down, draw a line in the sand, [fill in the blank/you get the idea] with the narcissist in my life. He's resisting hard, and may well tell me to take a hike as a result of my pushing back on his need for total control ... but I am determined to show up for myself again, finally. Thanks again for your eye-openers! : )
He seriously asked what can he do to "help" me heal, and I told him, "How can I heal from the hands of the same person who hurt me?" Needless to say, that triggered him, caused an argument, now the tables have been turned, and I'm insensitive and ungrateful because I refused his "help". I'm still not OK.
Hugs. You're not alone
You're more worth than that.
I'm going through that my advice be patient with yourself...
Boom! "You can't heal in the same environment that made you sick.." Mental Healness. What a perfect presentation. Thank you for delivering the truth.
Leaving is hard, staying is hard. Choose a hard. So simple but spelt out OMG it's an eye opener.
I'm glad to have a word for what I'm going through. I made him leave, and I won't let him back if he doesn't do what I need him to work on. In 2020 I broke down and told my best friend what I was going through, she mentioned he sounds like a covert narcissist... I cried for days researching because I have an answer to why he's different and I'm miserable.
Thank you for sharing your story and insight, it really helps people like me.
God Bless you.
"I cried for days researching because I have an answer to why he's different and I'm miserable."
I so feel you.
Here's some guy, a Narcissist himself, talking about this disorder and his therapy. It might help you guys. God bless you.
ruclips.net/video/CTJeec2DA-U/видео.html
Still in this. It's hell. I've been discarded but the pattern started early on in the relationship. You end up trauma bonded for a long time after it ends. It's a nightmare to break.
Thanks for saying that Lisa! I’m only a month and a half out. It is a nightmare. I’m exhausted and doing everything I can. I am curious since you wrote this 3 mths ago how you are now and if you have any advice
Leaving is hard, but eventually it does get better. I broke it off recently after a year of seeing someone, where I saw a culmination of these narcissistic traits. It was hard and I had a mixture of emotions (e.g., missing the person, regret, anger, etc.) while also replaying the dynamics of the relationship. However, the time apart provided more confirmation that I was doing the right thing and my life has improved in the process. I saw these videos after my breakup which further confirmed that my decision to leave was for the best.
I'm 5 weeks without my narc, I'm feeling so empty and lost without them, I'm aware of all I've been put through yet still I'm missing them!! How stupid is that . I'm so messed up
@@cazadoo339 I'm feeling the same way. Unbearable.
Doing this right now. SO freaking hard. So glad I left though.
I am too ashamed and cannot put my close friends and family through the vicious cycle he puts me through. They're tired of hearing the same thing -- how he'd hurt me, I'd fall apart at the seams, they'd listen & be there and invest in helping me heal, only for me to go running back to him.
I have similar situation. My mom and brother helped me get out a few times and I mean drove through states to help me pack and go back home all for me to get back. Now that I finally know what is going on and the empty promises are just that no one wants to help. My mom said go volunteer and get out of the house like that’ll change. My health is so bad and getting worse ugh. Now I regret not staying away back in 2015.
Such good advice in this video. "Pick your hard" - can't tell you how many times that reminder has helped me.
Glad it was helpful!
This is perfect.
This was MUCH needed!! I’m dealing with a covert narcissist. A whole action is different than their words kind of person.An authentic goal post mover. I’m tired of the trauma bond. I had to put him out while he was at work after being caught emotionally cheating and sexting with a chick ..but calling her a friend. I need to get off this hamster wheel.
Empaths get emeshed and codependent even addicted to the narcissist.
Now imagine, you are both. I finally quitted the "relationship", *cough "friendship" after more than 20 years. I can confirm, you are addicted, as well as exhausted like hell, yet, it's such a good feeling knowing this and getting immune.
Being a empath comes from trauma most times then not just like narcissism.
Narcs hold on long enough to find another victim to move to. That's it. Period.
There is security in Hell. You've 'Been there, done that" and you only know how to deal with/survive that what you've previously experienced.
Change is terrifying.
But, Change is also enlightening, motivating and empowering.
Abusers love stagnancy. Embrace change.
Thank you for this.
It’s true that I never felt so comfortable with someone like I was with him. He became the male version of me! Then BOOM!!! I started seeing the red flags but by this time I’ve moved my whole house in his apartment. So I began planning to move my belongings out(he sold all his furniture that was infested with bed bugs, yep sold it instead of throwing it away…trifling) I was addicted to him because of the extra affection. Well now that I know his life is doomed to hell, it’s easier for me to detach. I’m progressing as he declines.
@ LovinMe Lake best move you ever made. Leaving him. They are the same, will always be the same. My ex has a stinky moldy leather jacket that he cannot even fit into BUT he insists upon keeping it. If they do get rid of something, they want $$$ for it. It is just mental
@@cher8136 they are disgusting vile individuals. Like I’ve said before, a person doesn’t know how miserable they are until they get out of the miserable situation. To go back to that is asking to die a dreadful death. I’m ecstatic that I left.
@@livinmylife5025 Me too! Leaving him was so easy at that point because he was so miserable. I don't miss his unhappy face AT ALL. His nasty words or nasty disposition. He will be a crotchety old man no doubt
@@cher8136 it’s ironic you mentioned his unhappy face, I too went through that. He looks older than what he is and he was always unpleasant to look at but I was attracted to him in the beginning and didn’t know why. Of course I know why now. I had to get to a point of knowing I’m not missing out on anything dealing with him. I constantly remind myself of the conversations I had with some of his exes. We all share similarities. I will never go back. EVER! I’m thankful for this platform to vent.
@@livinmylife5025 Like you, I was so relieved to find out what I was dealing with period. I knew nothing about NPD. And throw in depression with that too....he was a walking nightmare. He never wanted to get help. I tried pushing for him to get help for his depression but for a narcissist to admit there is ANY kind of problem, is a problem. I was with him an embarrassing total of 18 years. Married 10 of them. Like you, I would never go back. We both had ex's prior and I know she would never go back. They had kids together so in many ways it was probably worse for her. His oldest daughter is a narcissist as well. Big shocker there huh? When I met her she was this sweet kid. Not any more
The best advice is to study. the more aha moments you get the more clarity comes.
I don't understand how we can avoid these ppl before it's too late. I'm still in a lot of pain n really feel alone n like ppl don't understand. It's kind of like a ache that doesn't go away... Anyone who dealing with or has stay strong n keep God first
This has got to be the Best. Description/ Explanation. Ever!!!
Mr. Hammock, you are the shiznit on multiple levels.
I remember when my mother told me not to leave my ex husband. She said he just needed some one to deeply love him. At this point I'd had enough and said "why don't YOU love him then if he's so wonderful then"? and we both fell about laughing 😂😂😂
But on a more serious note I had a therapist tell me that if you want to begin to break the trauma bond you have to literally use aversion techniques like if you think they talk too much. Try to imagine him/her literally talking vomit or diarrhea 🤮💩🤮💩🤮 imagine the stench and use as much detail as you can. If you use this imagery when they try to sweet talk/love bomb you..... Believe me you won't want to kiss them or have them anywhere near you again 😜😜.
Good luck 😃✌🏾
My situation was different. My mom helped me get away a few times and move in with her the last time she helped me find a house and I let my husband come back. Now I finally realized what is going on she tells me to go volunteer and get out of the house more😢 this time I actually am more than ready. I’m in physical pain and my health is so bad I can even work at the moment so I’m trying to get my own plan together now. Basically my family got tired of me taking him back and it sucks but it’s my fault.
@@bean8354 try not to be too hard on yourself. I'm not sure any of us get away on the first attempt, I know I didn't. Usually it's a case of running out of options that does it and it sounds like you might be there.
Also do not ignore your own health! I did that too and years later I've been diagnosed with Multiple sclerosis ...... I always used to say that he got on my nerves 😂😂. I try not to dwell on the past but they literally suck the life from you if you let them.
Good luck, things can only get better if you focus on loving your self 🌞✨🌈💜
Lee I've been watching you for almost a year I think, and if I hadn't been told about you by my daughter, I wouldn't be strong enough right now to be leaving this situation. I want to thank you so much for being so strong and brave. I wish everybody with this disorder could I have enough bravery to try and fight it. Because the pain it causes isn't just one person in my life it is an entire community my entire family and every friend I've ever had. And my children. So and that's just one man. So thank you for being self aware and for helping everyone thank you so much.
please stay safe and protect yourself
He does makes it hard to break up completely. Even after all the cheating and lying years of emotional abuse, we are still together. He is seeking therapy. Appreciate your honesty Lee. I am learning that I am trauma bond.
An actual self aware narcissists providing advice/ counseling to the survivors you could be charging so much more…The energy & info you’re giving is priceless
I try to make it affordable for as many ppl as possible.
Wow this man speaks the hard truth ! He’s exposing the evil ! To help others !
I was on and off for 9 years with my ex narc and we have an 8 year old and now a 3 month old. I left in the beginning of my pregnancy. He begged for me to come back and now all of a sudden he's in a whole new relationship. I gotta keep telling myself that it doesn't matter what I feel for the moment I and my kids need to get a chance at a healthy and happy life. Thank you for these videos. It just reassure that I made the right decision.
What a constructive way for a real narcissist to get the supply/ affirmation he needs! I say this in love and sincerity! God bless your soul! Thank you God for showing him a constructive way to get affirmation that he’s good. Maybe that’s the remedy to reverse the curse! 🙌🏾✨
Every time i start watching a video on dealing with this narcissist, he calls!!!!!! He totally interrupts the video - every time.
Good teaching once again! You do have to cut them off...COMPLETELY to break the bond, and you do have to get comfortable with being ALONE. Scary at first, but after a while you'll notice a beautiful peace!
I’m grateful and humbled to discover your channel. Every concept you mentioned has been insightful to say the least. Much respect! 🦋🙏🏾
Great video..after a year apart I have finally broken the trauma bond. It feels great and freeing. 🙂
thank you ! you are helping so many people, when you said music, it is a trigger , I force myself to remember the worst visit, and how I felt , also your quote " sweep you off your feet quickly is to drop u on your head" on point !!
Best channel on narcissism, right from the horses mouth! Giving me clarity and encouragement to keep a deeply wounded person out of my life so that I can heal
Best line for me in this video: if someone is sweeping you off your feet too fast it is to drop you on your head... 🎤 Drop...
🙏🏽🙏🏽
The whole time I’m listening I’m just thinking wow. I needed this so bad. I’ve been watching your tik tok for a while but I’ll definitely be coming to your RUclips now.
This is what i really need to hear rn..thank you so much Lee..you're such a big help for me,for my recovery.GOD bless you and your family💖
This is the best description of trauma bonding I have heard yet. The addictive power of the removal of the punishing behaviors of the devaluing stages of the narcissistic relationship is effectively what psychologists call negative reinforcement--which is not "punishing" as the opposite of reward. It is the removal of continuous punishment by--in the case of trauma bonding-- the introduction of reward--and therein you develop the addiction to the person. Negative reinforcement is the strongest of all the conditioning behaviors (stronger than reward alone or of punishment alone), and here it is in the trauma bonding process. WOW!
Ignore the lining through the words--don't know why that appeared. Have a new laptop and not yet accustomed to the platform.
This is helping me so much. I used to beat myself up inside every time I went back but I literally could not help myself. Knowing exactly what I was going back to and the emotional abuse I would endure... but still going back. Now I know why and how I can move forward. Thank you, sending many blessings to you and yours 🙏
I am struggling in an unhealthy relationship. Everything that your saying is truth. I need help . I don't even know where to start
have to make a plan
@@MentalHealness whenever I try to set forth healthy boundaries for the relationship my husband agrees . And then goes and plays by his own set of rules. I nearly left a year ago. He changed for awhile and now it is worse.
@@chastitywheeler8273 sounds like what I'm going through 😓.
Grey rock if you stay. A boundary is something you set. Much like a child, if you allow the boundary to be crossed without consequence, the child will push further the next time.
No chasing, no discussion, no pining no fawning. Just.Stop.Everything. if they get pissy, let them stew in their own piss. Not your problem.
YOU ARE THE REAL ONE LEE!!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Thank you 😊
Best advice ever! Once I began journaling every single instance of abuse and neglect I was able to step further back from the bad situation. It helped to help me break the bond with the toxic person who was controlling my life. Reading back through the journal helped in the process as well as I was able to see the progression of abusive and how much worse he became while I became healthy again. It helped to regain my self esteem.
I’m so happy the Trauma Bond doesn’t work on me anymore. I died when he said “You wanna leave? Let’s have a baby! You wanna leave again? Let’s have ANOTHER BABY!” 😂😂😂💀
Glad you made it, just had to break up with a longterm friend, can't imagine your stress. Now you're happy, that's great.
I wanted another baby for years my ex refused because he struggled parenting the 2 we had. Fair enough.
But after I demanded divorce.. he begged to have another baby.
Can’t make this. Shit. Up.
@@bjornna7767 It been years. I learned early.
@@ekah1234 That is crazy. 😧 I took me a while to understand that these people really exist.
Thank you for being transparent! This Gold! GOD BLESS YOU ON YOUR JOURNEY! KEEP PUSHING!
Started writing my thoughts down, it helped clear my mind. Thanks for the advice.
Yes Lee! You did it, I now understand. Fantastic job explaining the trauma bond. It can be confusing, but you did an excellent job.
I got sick...like I was coming off the worst drug imaginable. My body hurt, my stomach hurt, I couldn't focus, I looked for other things to feel better. Most insane thing I've ever been through. You're right. Study, pick your hard and move forward.
Lee Hammock!!! Thank you for these videos. I thought i knew it all. To not romanticize my fucked up marriage has been my challenge for over 5 months. That's how long my husband has been gone/dead and today i feel my reality, my truth. Exactly what the therapist has been trying to help me with. Long, long journey for me because he suffered n i watched. Over 25 years n he was hard core, not to be fucked with. Writing and watching videos has been giving me that validation to see exactly how fucked up of a human being he really was. Going back and rereading what i write seems like it's someone else's life. Thank you for letting go of your pride, just enough pride to do these videos. Pride can be bad but good to. You just don't know the difference this is making in my life right now. A thousand times over, Thank You.
People need to realize how valuable this information is 🙏 I would have given anything to know about narcissism and sociopathy when I was with my abuser. I could have been the one to walk away rather than get discarded. I wouldn’t blame myself. I would understand what gaslighting is and that I’m not losing my mind or forgetting things. I wondered what was wrong with me I went to therapy. I got on medication it wasn’t my fault it never was…
Awesome video! Complete validation here once again
Thank you Sir for sharing what you are aware of to help others! I wish I knew this years ago…❤️
I'm 70 days withdrawal ups and downs .. No contact!!!!!!!!!! Absolutely!!!!!!
“If someone is sweeping u off ur feet too fast, it is to drop u on ur head.” -the narc.
🎯
Thank you so muuuuch for making these videos! They are sooooooo helpful and I would love to see the narcs in my family and surroundings to be like you, to share info and make amends.
you're welcome
First off, thank you so much for sharing and being vulnerable with us all. I've been watching your videos now for a week or so and it's been therapy for me big time. I've gotten more help from your videos than from any doctors viewpoints or videos. I've always been put off by the whole attack on people that are on some level or full blown Narcissist can not love, can not feel, and they launch their attacks which in turn causes more trauma because it invalidates those things you know are for a fact real feeling and emotions in the Narcs in our lives and then makes me question myself.
I do believe my husband has real pain, real fears, real sorrow, but like you mentioned ..... your brain shuts it down and changes into the other mode for whatever reason. Only God's opinion of us matters in life and the real gift is the Peace that Jesus left us along with his Holy Spirit which is our true counsel when we accept Jesus as Lord.
There are so many many amazing traits my husband has, but his mouth, and addictive personality disorder, along with all this Narcissist manipulation is just too much and after 21 years of marriage done.
My fear for not leaving recently is because I do believe I'm trauma bonded, and once I leave and if he decides to changes like you have, praise God (many prayers for you and your family to remain strong and blessed), I'm just scared that I know once I'm out and I choose the Hard of leaving and detoxing that if he does om fact truly change I'll never trust him and I'll never take him back.
I see all the potential like you said, and it exhausts me to even think about trying to play along and I just can't ask anyone to play a game or them to play one with me. Sad, we have an amazing 18 year old son together and he moved out because he couldn't deal with it anymore.
I believe we all need to learn to be okay with being alone & enjoy it. Now that I spent time getting to know God because he's chased me down for years and he knows me, now I have so much peace and I don't have to live with trusting anyone even myself, because only God is truth, even we lie to ourselves.
So anyway, thank you. I truly feel like God has allowed you to go through this to make you stronger and to help others.
Different types of trauma bonds. Not sure what to call it but when the Narc does or says the worst things possible to you on memorable moments. Like fight you after a funeral or on your birthday…
This is so every time you think of the funeral or birthday you’ll think of them, for the most part forever. And they know it.
Might have to watch this one a few times! I'm only about a month or two into learning about my TBing.. wow.. tysm ✌
Excellent analogy about gaslighting!👌🏾
Word! Very good video & advice. Please keep these coming!
will do. Thank you
It’s been 5 months no contact and it’s a everyday battle.. I miss him but I love me more.. staying strong because I deserve to be happy!!
Wow thank you.
That helps a lot.
I always tried to get an apology or some peace or some forgiving with that people that did that to me.
I didn't get it, it just became worse and worse.
I also felt like disconnecting with the world and being just for and with myself brought the most healing.
Even though somehow I felt addicted to the trauma bond and the pain already... It made me feel alive somehow. Feeling that pain and desperation.
I wanted to be seen with my pain inside... I wanted others to see my pain and then take it away from me. I wanted those people to see it, that did that to me.
They never saw anything.
They never realized what they have done to me.
But my sister deserves something better then some desperate crying person addicted to the pain and desperation.
Oh I have some problems for sure....
Caught in trauma bonding.... I better cut myself off.
My just completely with myself and for myself and find the happyness within me again and my joy for the world and for life.
Thank you Lee.
You have helped me immensely.
Lose 10 lbs. gain it back!
Lose 10 lbs. gain it back!
Uuugh! Don’t miss the stress!
Lee, you are so right. I tried to help a survivor. But she couldn't understand why he didn't "want her anymore" I tried to tell her he is not concerned about you, you need to move on. Power up as you say!
You are speaking my life right now!!! It does get better over time.... it's extremely important to go no contact because they know you too well and they will use your wants and needs against you...😮💨 I love this channel especially this particular video because it's LIBERATING!!!!💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
So true, wasn't till I moved home after covid that I could see the forest from the trees. I was removed from it and around people who treated me well
It's the wounded inner children bonded ... Took me a long time to realize that. Im bpd diagnosed and I kept trrrryyyyyying to tell narcissist there is reason that we draw to each other 1. The bpd and npd drawing annnnnnnnndddd then one day it hit me it's our broken little selves. I hate it but I will fight that bond until my death. No more. I see it all and whole situation just bad for me. Don'e with it.
Ps I love the smell of gas ... And I don't even listen to my playlist any more. I let that radio play song come on we like I change it. I don't go to any places we have in common. Don't talk to no people in common. Luckily I had about 15 weeks of no contact. Currently they try testing waters and I just don't even emote I just say done is done.
I have had the same thought on the wounded inner children bonding together. I don’t think a personality disorder is needed to experience this. Just two wounded inner children can. Just a thought.
@@bowpow00 I've had personality disorder since I was child ... Conduct disorder that developed into bpd. I would image there would have to be some type of trauma and object relations issues to tolerate such behavior.
THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR SHARING
I HAVE BEEN TRAUMA BONDED TO AN OVERT NARCISSTIS FOR OVER 8 YEARS.I KNOW THAT THIS PERSON IS NO GOOD HE ABUSES ME HE CALLS ME HORRIBLE NAMES. HE COMES AROUND ONLY 2 USE ME.THEN HE DISCARDS ME AND GIVES ME THE SILENT TREATMENT. TRAUMA BONDING IS DANGERS.
I have been ghosted for about a week now but each time I feel the need to text or call I stop and listen to one of these videos. I deleted the number so I won’t be tempted anymore. I will be deleting the message as soon as it gets to my phone once he tried to come back. Always with some bullshit apology. And then tells me he misses me or loves me or some shit. I do not see him anymore on a daily basis and got myself away so I could heal. This dude is so full of shit I can’t even. I broke the trauma bond but sometimes I get that anxiety. It’s so hard but I know I have to do it to be truly happy. Thanks for your videos they really help me relate.
Thank you for all you do to help us!!!!!
i just want you to know your a good person i can see that, thanks for your help
Thank you
After I moved out, I bought blankets, pillows, cute stuffed animals and decorated to make my room feel like a safe comfortable place
Everytime i got away yo ttry and straighten my head out, they either love bombed me or emotiinally manipulated me by telling me there where depressed or suicidal. In the end i sussed it all out and finally got away. So much projection as well. The list goes on. You give your alll and get nothing in return. I stood up to mine for quite a long time and they couldnt handle the truth and never wanted to take responsibility for their actions. Told them my boundaries as a decemt human being who is supposed to be in a healthy loving relatiionship and everytime they overstepped them, i let them know.
It's a long crazy story. In the end I got so exhausted with trying and having to stand up for myself and all the gasligthing and ghosting etc. Then they do the classic discard. On principle it makes you mad at them, let alone the hurt from putting your heart in. How could somebody do all this to me. Answer, because they are an evil self centres dusgusting narcasist. What they don't realise now is that they've shot themselves in the foot . Because this chicken has woken up and is not oing back. Too much self respect to put myself through any more of that shit. But it hasnt been easy getting to this point. Just get away and let yourself fall back together if you can. Even if you plan your escape slowly. The narc will know your up to something but dint say anythung. You can bet your bottom dollar that they will ramp up the discard or all the other shit that they pull, if they cotton on.
Fact is that if you have attracted a narc into your life, it's because you are the cream of humanity and one of the best most careing compassionate empathetic people and believe in truth and integrity. Which is why the narcs world of lies and deciept can send you into a crazy fog of gognative disonance. They rely on your true ferelngs as a good hunan and that's what hooks you in there. Its your precious heart. that they get you hooked in by. Narsassist only choose the best, so don't forget that. Wishing everybody all the very best. And good luck with this crazy Jig saw puzzle.
Buckle up ! This is what I needed to hear
👏🏽👏🏽
Fresh AIR!! Great analogy! Thanks Bro!
And do things by yourself! Without the phone. Great advice! 🙌🏼
You got it!
They say trauma bond biochemicals is 100x more addictive than heroin
Holy shit...I have been strict no contact with the covert nasty narc for over two years. I'm doing the inner work, and have healed a great deal, but I am learning more from you than any doctor! I'm freaking the f out!!!
You speak about "Good Supply" can you do a video on just what that is from the narcs point of view??
Thank you so much, for such a informative content.
Holy shit!!! My narcissistic ex used to accuse me of looking at other females when I knew damn well I didn't.
Yes bond was so strong I think for my narcissistic x husband as well. One day after beat me till unconscious he said this is our marriage I’m going to abuse you. Even said he would kill me in angry not fell remorse. I will not take no blame everything is your fault even if I have bad day. Your kind an sweet to sensitive except it. Three days later made coffee food stared jar changed he was at work. I drove to whole another state with 80 nothing else filed police report. I left with nothing had big house job life. Started all the way over. I left more than 7 times this time I did not go back. I felt sick like withdrawing from crack him. I felt he was sick to ask me to come home I did not. I’m free all cycle happened end smear campaign him trying to destroy me he could not destroy child god. I forgive him I prayed for him. Thank you for your insight helping others set free an cope mr lee
Yes. Literally. The first time I left long term (a year and a bit). I left the province. Complete no contact. I was acting crazy the first few days. I hid in the closet.
I feel you. Hope you're safe🧡
@@Picca65 I’m pretty sure he won’t hurt me. It’s just annoying and driving me crazy. Or I am crazy. That’s always possible.
@@pajamacladangel9920 keep searching for yourself. You'll find yourself eventually in all that crazy.
@@pajamacladangel9920 are you sure he didn't of doesn't mentally disregulate you?
@@Picca65 I think he does.. but how can I be certain? Maybe I’m projecting. Maybe when I think he’s love bombing me, I’m actually love bombing him. Maybe I don’t know. If I was a covert narcissist I would think it’s his fault even if it is my own.
Thank you for this
🙏🏽
Every time I leave and come back, every time I leave and come back, Every Time I leave and come back 😒💔
Bro I always appreciate your insight. Thank you so very much💯😀💪👊👍
Thank you I get panic attacks when he calls me. .
This is good bruh. I am well versed on NPD. 🙏🏻
I thought this through and I see how both parties can get killed by that behavior the narcissist has. No offense because I know everyone has some of it in them!
I think that would be a great video, how would a narc get away from a narc!?
Great videos. Phenomenal job!
I tried dating after him and the new guy started showing some of his traits n it immediately put me in chase mode. I ruined two great relationships bc of how scared I was to feel like I was at someone’s will like that again
♥️ I so much appreciate you 3 more weeks to go
♥️🔨
Whew! A word!
After 16 years of divorce, I'm still trauma bonded. We had a kid together, after I left and came back, and left for good. I stay away from relationships.
Kick them to the curb. Get therapy if you can afford it. Let them know you are codependent.
🥺
That's so incredibly sad.. Everyone deserve love and a companion to share their lives with..When I hear this it hurts because essentially the narcissism has won....
Don't give up on love because a disordered individual hurt you.
@@MentalHealness If you can't heal in the same environment that made you sick,then how can your family heal...I find that if you change you,you can change how you react to your family environment,etc....That gives your family a fighting chance...
@@clarajones5626 I will keep learning, and applying, ways to heal myself, from the trauma. Thank you, for your kind words.
A narcissist would never admit to being narcissistic.
I try to lose him. I left him before and I came back. And I'm going crazy 😢
I am currently stuck in another 9 months lease with him we have 2 kids together and i told him that we cant afford where we stay so we are going to have to leave here he didnt text me back his daughter that lives with us hasnt spoken to me in almost a week i did learn alot about him but now i dont know the lies vs. Truth
Because of the trauma bond, I know what addiction feels like. I pushed through the other side with all my strength and know after THAT experience I can overcome anything. It was a very dark challenging time that I knew that breaking that chain was all apart of my awakening. My dear Lord...🙏🏽❤ Wow! Smh. So thankful & grateful for leaving immediately. 😊
@ Monica Benjamin
Narcissists are attracted to empaths. People who are caring and can be intuitive. The narcissist will try to brake your spirit. You are nothing but an appliance, an object to the Narc. It’s a game to them to see how far and how much emotional pain they can inflict.
Some Narcs can behave like dark triads. This type of behavior is considered:
Cold Blooded. 🩸
What about the narc who is trauma bonded to their ex spouse.....keeps contsct and uses that person to control the new supply?
Thanks for your truth ☀️
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Why when you're getting stronger,& try to leave the NARCISSIST SWEAR they are/have changed or talk about hurting themselves??
Idk what to do my parents are narcissit I want to heal but like how do I keep my friends i already have ??
it's a tough thing to do
Whats up mr lee since the consultation He still calling now its restricted i dont answer still shaking my head continuing no contact no communication whatsoever. Its gone get real when my phone go off to actually break the trauma bond. I got to be real with myself like every time i see his number my chest hurt like my stomach is queasy even though i haven't talked to him in weeks he tryna soften me up the games i played with him has came to haunt me i think my chest flutters now. You right every thing is a trigger. Im going thru withdrawals frfr.
Yup, isolate some... find yourself BETTER STRONGER SELF!!!!!!!